


Only The Truth

by JUNMAK0



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Amusement Parks, Angst, Birthday Party, Bucky Barnes's Metal Arm, Chubby Reader, F/M, First Dance, First Date, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Hickeys, Jealousy, Loss of Virginity, Love Bites, Massage, Motorcycles, Movie Night, Mutual Masturbation, Oral Sex, Phone Calls, Protective Bucky, Public Display of Affection, Self Confidence Issues, Self-Esteem Issues, Slow Burn, Smut, Strangers to Lovers, Teasing, Tickling, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Truth or dare game, Vaginal Sex, Virgin Reader, a lot of dates, a lot of tears, angst but with happy endings, btw the tags can be confusing, bucky loves teasing the reader, choking (not kinky), cute nicknames, forget thor from the first chapters reader and him are friends now, im sorry for what i did to thor in the first chapters i swear he gets better, mentions about asgard, mentions of past bullying, no specific timeline but imagine it happens after civil war and it had a good end, ok maybe this isn't as fluffy as it was at the beginning, reader has healing powers, small description of injuries, steve and nat are team bucky, steve and nat ship it, steve is the mom of the avengers, the story doesn't revolve around reader having to pick between bucky and loki, theres refs to avengers 1, this is gonna hit very close home, this work will contain smut later, thor is team loki, tony doesn't hate bucky, tony is a father figure to reader, we really 200k into this huh, will eventually add more tags
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-09
Updated: 2019-09-05
Packaged: 2020-04-23 04:51:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 85
Words: 265,322
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19143931
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JUNMAK0/pseuds/JUNMAK0
Summary: You are a soon to become Avengers member and now you get to live in the Stark Tower. What will you find there? A friend? Perhaps more?





	1. First day at the Stark Tower

**Author's Note:**

> I'm obsessed with Bucky and now I only write for him.

"Alright. Everyone, may I have your attention please?" Tony Stark got up from his seat and looked at the Avengers members. It was a normal night like an another, the Avengers were having dinner in the Stark tower like they usually did if the team wasn't on a mission to protect Earth or its people. Everyone stared at Tony, waiting for what he had to say. "I'd like to introduce you all to our new member." He announced with a smile. The Avengers all exchanged looks, a bit surprised by the news.

"A new member?" Natasha Romanoff asked. Tony didn't reply as he walked towards the door and opened it. The new member waiting behind it.

You were really nervous. Fidgeting on your feet and taking deep breathes to calm yourself down. You weren't a big fan of being in the center of the attention but to add onto your stress this wasn't just any crowd. It was the fucking Avengers. Of course you knew them, of course you were a huge fan and of course you were intimidated as fuck. You were already a mess in front of normal people so you really didn't want to do this. You also knew Tony Stark had a thing for shows so he wouldn't introduce you gradually to one member at a time to ease your social anxiety. You couldn't really be mad at him though, you weren't very vocal about your insecurities.

Suddenly the door opened, you raised your head and Tony smiled at you before gently grabbing your arm. You smiled back trying to make a good impression. You walked into the huge dinner room and oh God, they were all here and staring at you.

"A child?" You recognized Thor's deep voice. You crossed eyes with him as he was judging you from up and down. You wanted to disappear. Thankfully Captain America came at your rescue.

"Don't be rude. Hi, I'm Steve Rogers. Welcome to the team." He offered you his hand as he smiled in a friendly way at you.

"I-I'm [Y/N]." You stammered. You shook his hand unenergetically and quickly so your hand could go back to your side.

"Actually not in the team yet." Tony spoke. "She's talented but never worked- did this kind of job before." He corrected himself. "Consider her more like a trainee."

"So you want us to babysit her?" Thor spoke again. Seriously, what was his problem?

"What does she do?" Nat asked. Tony looked at you so you could speak for yourself.

"I can heal people." You looked at her. Nat raised her eyebrow.

"Really?" What she did next left you and everyone else speechless except for Thor who let out a scream. She grabbed a knife that was on the table and ran it against the asgardian's arm. It wasn't a deep cut but it was enough for blood to drip. "Show us." She challenged you.

"That didn't even hurt." Thor recomposed himself after letting that ridiculous shriek that made Bruce Banner snicker next to him.

You walked towards the God of thunder and kneeled in front of him before putting your palms against his muscular forearm. You closed your eyes and concentrated, forgetting about everything around you, about where you were and who you were with, just focusing on the cut. The room was quiet, everyone was on the edge of their seat waiting for the result. If you were really who you pretended to be you'd be a huge help to the Avengers. You opened your eyes and brought your hands back to yourself as you got up. The cut was gone. No trace of a scar or blood stains. Thor raised his arm and inspected his skin thorougly.

"Incredible." Bruce let out, amazed.

"I like her." Thor raised his eyes to meet yours and grinned. Looks like he was just testing you after all.

"I'm twenty-five." You said to him as you placed yourself back next to Tony.

Everyone relaxed, the air had been very tense.

"So how did you find her?" Nat asked Tony.

"Fury." Everyone nodded, of course. "Missy here actually just heals random living beings that she finds on her way. People, animals or... secret agents. She found a SHIELD agent wounded and despite-" Tony paused to look at you. "Asking him to keep quiet about her abilities the agent immediately reported about her to Fury."

"Why did you want to stay hidden?" Steve asked you with his deep piercing blue eyes.

"I-I..." You sighed. "I just want a quiet life."

"Yeah well, you can say goodbye to that now." Bruce ironised. "Once SHIELD finds you they never leave you. Trust me."

"You shouldn't hide, you have great powers." Thor added.

"With great power-" You started.

"Comes great responsibility." Steve finished. He looked at you with a reassuring smile. He understood.

Suddenly the door opened and you all turned your heads towards it to see who interrupted. You recognized him and your body froze. The winter soldier. You had heard about him, his metal arm and what he could do with it.

"Hey." He threw nonchalantly as he noticed all the stares on him. "Am I interrupting something?"

"Not at all." Tony shrugged. "Say hi to our trainee though. She's gonna be living in the tower with us now." Bucky looked around, searching for the new face until he crossed eyes with you.

"Hey, I'm Bucky." He gave you a head nod.

"[Y/N]." You replied quickly.

"You're late for dinner." Steve joked.

"Won't be the first time." Bucky replied to him.

"[Y/N], did you eat yet? You can eat with Bucky if you want." Steve said to you, meaning well.

Eat? In front of other people? Yeah, ok. Not happening. You have always been mocked for your appearance your entire life so now you were just used to eat by yourself or very small amount of food at special occasions where you couldn't avoid not being there. But this, this was above your strength. You knew what you looked like. Fat. Fat and repulsive in your own eyes. People did make you feel like it your whole life too though. They were always making comments about what you were eating, be it junk food or healthy food, people just had something to say about it. You couldn't stand it anymore, so you shut yourself out.

"Yes, I did." A lie. You were starving. But starvation was an ache you were far too familiar with. You would just grab something in the middle of the night while everyone was asleep, no one would be there to see you. This was your new job now and you needed to feel comfortable. You knew that if one of them made any comment about what you ate or your appearance you would vanish in the second.

Steve nodded and said nothing more. Bucky threw you a glance too but quickly acted as if normal. It was late now and people excused themselves for the night. Tony already showed you around the tower earlier but he didn't give you a room yet. So as everyone left and you stood in the middle doing nothing Tony rememberd.

"Oh yes, [Y/N], your room. Come." You left the dinner room with one last glance for the winter soldier and followed Tony's steps.

  
  


"She looks... uncomfortable. I think it was me." Bucky said to Steve, only the two of them remained in the dinner room.

"I think she's just shy. She didn't hesitate when she showed us her powers." Steve reassured his best friend. "But I don't think it's you. It's her first day and Tony told us she never worked in a team before."

"What's her powers?" Steve picked bucky's curiosity.

"She can heal with just her hands. I wouldn't have believed it if I didn't see it with my own eyes. It was extraordinary." Bucky nodded. "Well, see you later Buck." Steve got up and put a hand on his shoulder.

  
  


You were in an elevator with Tony, this area of the tower were all the bedrooms were. It stopped at your floor that was surprisngly high but you had nothing to say about it. Tony stepped out as you followed him.

"Here you go." He took your hand and gave you a card. "It opens and closes the door."

"The function of a key, yes."

"Right. Anyway, I think this floor is pretty quiet if I remember correctly. You only have one neighbor next to your room. Bucky." (Awesome) You thought ironically. "If you need something or if you get lost, trust me it happened, you can call F.R.I.D.A.Y. She will guide you." He smiled at you before leaving. "Make yourself comfortable." The elevator doors closed on him.

You slided the card on the card reader next to the door and it unlocked it. "Welcome [Y/N]." You heard a woman's voice. "I am F.R.I.D.A.Y. If you have any questions don't hesitate to ask me." Well, that's it, you were a trainee future Avengers member at the Stark tower and going to be working with the world's most famous heroes.

  
  


\---

  
  


You had arranged your belongings into the different closets and drawers of your room and took a shower before laying onto your new bed. You had no idea what would tomorrow be made of and you were nervous about it. You didn't like the unexpected. You hated being so anxious about everything and constantly overthinking. You wish you could use your powers on yourself and heal your mind alas, as ironic as it is, you couldn't heal yourself.

_Gmblmm..._

A sound coming out of your stomach got you out of your reverie though. It's been 3 hours since you met with the Avengers. When you thought back about it it happened so fast. They all seemed friendly, Tony making you the most comfortable and Thor the least but you figured he wasn't a mean person, it was just his way to test you and bring out your personality. You weren't mad at him. Steve, Bruce and Nat looked friendly too and they welcomed you well. Someone else greeted you but you don't know why, it felt different. The winter soldier, your new neighbor, Bucky. Maybe it was because of everything you heard in the news but he intimidated you. More than the others of course. You had heard about his background, the serum, hydra, the brainwashing and honestly you felt sorry for him. Sorry he had to go through all these horrors and despite it all he acted normal with people around him and you earlier. Maybe he was putting on an act to hide his deepest fears and traumas, just like you did. The person you showed outside was nothing like who you really were. You liked to joke, you liked to laugh, you even liked making friends but your insecurities were entraving you. You were always afraid of people making fun of you because whenever that happened you would freeze and shut yourself. You would be reminded you didn't belong where you were.

Your stomach reminded you once again that you were hungry. You checked the time. It was very late. You had heard a door outside your room close an hour ago and you guessed it was Bucky rejoining his room but you waited until he fell asleep to finally sneak into the kitchen to grab something to munch on. You couldn't be 100% sure everyone was deeply asleep but if you waited a bit more you would faint. You left your slippers in the room and decided to sneak in bare footed, it was more discreet. You ran to the elevator after standing in front of Bucky's room for 30 seconds, trying to hear anything but only silence replied. When you arrived at the corresponding floor all the halls were empty and the lights turned off. Yep, you were alone. You released the breath that you were holding and made it to the kitchen.

"At long last." You whispered to yourself as you opened the fridge. God, you wanted to bow down to whoever made the groceries around here. The fridge was filled with absolutely everything. You didn't have time to cook something so you quickly grabbed what you needed to make a big sandwich and closed the fridge door. When you were done you grabbed a high chair and sat on it to eat on the counter. God, this was good. You let out a pleasant sigh as you chewed. In your mental pleasure you unfortunately didn't hear the footsteps entering the kitchen.

"[Y/N]?"

You choked on your food and almost fell out of the chair as you turned around to see who caught you eating in the middle of the night. Just your luck. The winter fucking soldier.

"It's not what it looks like." You defended yourself. You saw his lips curve into a smile. What was so funny? You dropped your sandwich into your plate and took a sip of water. This was so embarrassing, you wanted to disappear. He was going to make fun of you and tell everyone in the morning how he caught the fat trainee stealing food.

"And what exactly does it look like?" He raised an eyebrow at you. You sighed.

"I-I..." God, fuck this. "I don't owe you an explanation."

"It's true." He said as he walked past you and grabbed a water bottle from the fridge. "But maybe you can explain to me why you were standing in our hallway and in front of my door listening for sounds?" You blushed as you dropped your head down. So he indeed wasn't sleeping.

"I lied earlier, alright?" He looked at you and didn't interrupt so you could go on with your explanation. "When the captain asked me if I had dinner, I said yes but I lied."

"So it was indeed me, you didn't want to eat with me?" He asked you.

"I don't want to eat with anybody."

"Why?"

You sighed deeply. "People make comments."

"About what?" He genuinely asked, he had no idea what you were getting at.

"My appearance, Bucky." You finally let out, exasperated. "I'm fat."

"And?" You thought he was doing this on purpose to mock you but when you raised your head towards him you saw confusion on his face. So you took another deep breath.

"I'm fat and I get mocked for it. Everytime I eat people make fun of me so I decided to stop eating in front of other people so I don't get to hear their mean comments anymore." You weren't hungry anymore. You left the half eaten sandwich on your plate and got up. You knew they were coming, tears and you bit on your lower lip to stop them until you'd reach your room where no one could see you.

"[Y/N]-" You didn't turn back and you left Bucky in the kitchen, running to your room as your vision blurred. You had to get out of there.

You shut the door behind you and dropped on your bed. You cried and boy, for a long time. It was your first day and you already screwed it up. Tomorrow first hour in the morning you were going to thank Tony for the opportunity but announce that you're leaving. You weren't going to say bye to the others and you were absolutely not going to cross roads with Bucky again. Not after making a fool out of yourself like you did tonight. Hopefully if he had an ounce of respect for you he wouldn't speak of what he saw.

  
  


_Knock, knock._

  
  


Oh no, someone was at your door. You held your breath as you raised your head from the wet pillow and stared at your door as if it was magically going to tell you what to do.

"It's Bucky." You heard his announcement. You really didn't want to do this right now. Maybe if you pretended you're asleep he'd walk away. "I know you're there, please open."

You let out a deep sigh and got up from your bed. You turned your pillow over on the other side and wiped your tears away with your fingers and then opened the door.

"You forgot this." You looked at his hand in confusion, he brought your sandwich.

"I'm not hungry." You said sharply.

"Yes, you are. If it's been since I met you that you're on an empty stomach you are still hungry and I'm not going back to my bedroom until you return that plate empty."

"Why are you doing this?" You asked him, frustrated. "You don't know me, why do you care?"

"Aren't you a new member? It's called teamwork." You didn't know how to respond to that. "Can I come in?" You rolled your eyes as you gave him your back and let him in.

"Sure." You sat on the edge of your bed. He put the plate next to your thigh and sat next to you.

"I'm sorry if I offended you in any way." He started.

"Don't. Please. You did nothing wrong, I just rememberd not pleasant memories and talking about them brought the pain back to the surface." You stared at your feet but he was looking at your face. He tried to gently put his hand on your shoulder but your body flinched unconsciously so he took it back.

"I'm not gonna pretend I understand what you feel because I don't but I really don't think it's anybody's type here to make fun of people." Bucky started laughing quietly. "You should see how Thor eats, I'm pretty sure you wouldn't feel bad about yourself after it."

"No one comments pretty people's eating habits." You said with a dry chuckle that felt empty. "A beautiful person could eat whatever they want in the amount that they want and no one would say anything mean about it." Bucky was about to say something but you interrupted him. "Trust me, I witnessed it. Be it healthy food or junk food if it's someone like _me_ eating it, people will find something to say." You continued. "If I'm eating a salad people will say that I'm trying to lose weight and start lecturing me about the right way to do it. If I eat a burger they will get meaner and say that I'm fat enough and if I keep eating i'll explode. Sometimes I wish I was invisible." You didn't even notice your hands were shaking until Bucky put his flesh hand on yours.

"I'm sorry you went through that. Some people out there are capable of the most evil things." You turned your head towards him, Bucky smiled at you as you glanced at his metal arm. He understood. "I'm gonna leave you alone for the night but promise me you're gonna finish that sandwich. I'm not gonna force you to eat in front of me if you're not ready but I hope one day we can share a meal that you enjoy with the rest of the team... or together, just the two of us." You blushed as he got up from your bed.

"I-I promise." You said quietly as you raised your head to him.

"Goodnight [Y/N]." The winter soldier smiled at you and left the room, closing the door behind him.

 


	2. Wrong encounter

You opened your eyes and looked around, remembering where you were. The Stark tower. You almost forgot. You spent five more minutes in your bed, rolling around and thinking about your new job as an Avengers trainee. You really did this. No going back to a quiet life now as Dr. Banner said. You got up and when you put your feet on the ground you hit something cold.

"Ugh, what is that?" You whined. You found your plate. You forgot about it. Bucky had nicely brought you your dinner back after you dashed out of the kitchen. That was really nice. You weren't used to kindess. You put it on the desk in your room and went into the bathroom to clean yourself before going downstairs.

You got out and walked to your closet. As usual, you picked a pair of black leggins and a hoodie. You didn't like to stand out and tight fitting clothes were out of the question. You let your hair down, the tips were still wet but they would dry in the air. You checked yourself in the mirror. You hated your appearance but you were only making sure there was nothing between your teeth or stains on you. You may be ugly and fat but at least you were clean. You grabbed the plate and left your room.

"Ooh cold." You really didn't expect the halls to be freezing. You honestly expected the Stark tower to fix the room temperatures on its own. The hallway was empty and there were no sounds coming out of Bucky's room. You had no idea if he was still sleeping or already up. You pushed the elevator button to go take a breakfast. No one could get between you and your breakfast. Not even your insecurity. You weren't a morning person and if you skipped breakfast you'd be in a sour mood all day.

You almost reached the door and you could hear a few voices, some members were already up. You took a deep breath and walked in.

"Hey, good morning [Y/N]." Ah, Steve Rogers. Always a sunshine. His bright smile alone warmed your chest.

"Good morning, captain. Hi, everyone else." You waved to the people behind Steve. Nat and Bruce were sipping coffee on the counter and they both waved back at you.

"You can call me Steve you know." He said to you with a smile. "Coffee? Or maybe tea?" He asked you as he grabbed an empty mug.

"I-I'm more of a milk type of person actually... But thank you Steve."

"Who the heck just drinks raw milk?" You heard Tony appear behind you.

"I do." You rolled your eyes.

"Leave her alone, Tony. And milk is good for the bones." Steve defended you as he nicely poured you a glass of milk. "Here you go."

"You know I can make my own breakfast." You said to him as you grabbed the glass. "But I appreciate, thank you."

"I'm just trying to make our new member feel comfortable." You blushed as you smiled. You were thankful.

"Anyway, what do _you_ have for breakfast?" You asked him.

"Coffee usually. Toasts if I have to be quick, pancakes if I can take my time. I love pancakes." You slightly giggled at his answer. Steve was just so adorable.

"I prefer crepes." You replied.

"Really? That's funny, Buck does too." You choked on your milk and started coughing. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. Hum. Wrong pipe." Speak of the devil, he just entered the kitchen.

Bucky had indeed already been up you assumed. He was wearing sportswear clothes and he was sweating a bit. You figured he had a morning routine. You couldn't help staring at him as he walked into the kitchen but quickly recomposed yourself as you noticed he was coming towards you and the captain.

"Hey Buck, [Y/N] and I were just talking about you." (Oh no, Steve what are you doing?) You blushed harder as you started focusing on your glass of milk as if it suddenly started speaking to you.

"Really? What were you saying?" Bucky glanced at you. You ignored him trying to avoid his gaze.

"We were talking about breakfast, I told her about my love for pancakes and she told me she preferred crepes. Like you!" You smiled slightly.

"Pancakes are just too thick, you can't even fill them." Bucky argued with Steve. You stopped smiling.

"I like thick." Steve said. Honestly were you the only one hearing how weird this conversation sounded?

"I like my crepes thin and then fill them with goodness. Otherwise they just taste too flour-y. I like a different kind of thick though." He said as he crossed eyes with you. You choked even louder this time. Steve quickly came behind you completely oblivious of the situation. He gently patted your back.

"I'm gonna get you a straw." Steve said.

"It's fine." You coughed as Bucky chuckled. "I'm good."

"Come grab a few toasts with me, you only had milk." Steve pulled a chair for you to sit on. Oh no, was this a good idea? Steve made you comfortable and after what happened last night you trusted Bucky with your secret but there were still too many people in this kitchen. You were hungry though...

Bucky noticed your hesitation but he waited for your response. He would help you if he noticed you needed him. He searched for your eyes and waited for any kind of hint you would give him. You took a deep breath. It was just breakfast and most of the people in the room didn't make you uncomfortable. You were safe. You were safe. You were safe.

You reached for the chair and Bucky relaxed. He walked next to you as Steve was preparing your breakfast.

"You okay?" He asked you quietly so no one would hear. You nodded. The winter soldier smiled at you as if to show he was proud of you. He was about to walk away but you grabbed his sleeve quickly, without thinking. He glanced at your hand then at your face.

"C-Can you stay?" You asked him anxiously.

"Steve, make some for me too. This jogging really opened my appetite." Bucky spoke to Steve but he stared into your eyes. You relaxed as you released his sleeve. He grabbed a chair and sat next to you. You looked into each other's eyes without saying anything. It's as if time stopped. Suddenly there was no one in the kitchen besides you and Bucky. His knee gently brushed against yours and you felt a sparkle run inside of you. It was indescribable.

"There you go." Steve's voice brought you and Bucky back to Earth. You awkwardly shifted straight onto your seat, ignoring whatever had just happened. It was nothing.

"Thank you, Steve." You said with a smile.

"You're very much welcome." The captain smiled back at you.

"Please sit down, you've done so much already." You started to feel bad.

"I'm coming right up, let me just grab the good stuff to spread on these bad boys." You let out a laugh. For the first time in a long long time you felt comfortable sharing food between two people. You truly felt at home. You hadn't noticed as you started buttering Steve's toasts for him to show your gratitude but Bucky's been looking at you with a small smile on his face.

  
  


\---

  
  


After breakfast you all split up. Steve went out, Tony and Bruce disappeard in their labs, Nat had something to do, you had no idea where Thor was and Bucky went to his room after you both took the elevator to your floor. You had nothing to do and the tower was huge. You couldn't just go out because, for one, you wouldn't have any idea where to go and second, you had social anxiety. Your room was pretty empty too so you couldn't entertain yourself with the stuff in it.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y.?" You called.

"Yes?" The AI replied immediately, startling you a bit to be honest.

"What do people do around here? I mean, to entertain themselves?" You asked.

"Mr. Stark have parties sometimes. There's also a gaming room, a jacuzzi, a training room, a pool, a library..."

"Wait, am I allowed to go there? The library?"

"Absolutely."

"Fantastic. Can you guide me please?"

"Of course."

You liked reading and at least it will make time pass faster. You didn't want to bother any of the Avengers members and they didn't look like they needed you so for now you would spend a little time by yourself. The AI guided you until you finally reached the library. It wasn't very big but there was a fair amount of books for you to pass some time. F.R.I.D.A.Y. guided you again throughs the rows so you could find a genre that you like.

"Can I take the book to my room?"

"Yes. If somebody asks for the book I will say that you have borrowed it."

"Alright, thank you." You held the book close to your chest and headed back to your room.

  
  


You spent the whole morning reading until your stomach started aching and making sounds around 12pm. It was lunchtime. You had no idea who was still in the tower and if they had schedules for stuff like this. You put the book down and left your room. You took a deep breath and knocked on Bucky's door.

"Hey [Y/N], what's up?" He greeted you with a smile as he opened the door. Oh god, what was this? He smelled so good. Also he was wearing a white tank top that looked a bit too tight around his pecs. You suddenly found yourself speechless as you stared at him. You were starting to look stupid so you quickly recomposed yourself.

"I-I... I'm sorry for bothering you-"

"You're not." He interrupted you. You smiled shyly.

"I really don't wanna sound like this but I'm new around here and it's lunchtime, I'm just wondering if the team usually have lunch together. Like, do you guys have a schedule or something?" He wanted to laugh, you worried about the tiniest things.

"It depends. If something is planned Tony usually announce it at breakfast. If not, feel free to just walk into the kitchen. Sometimes you find people, sometimes you don't." Bucky explained to you.

"Alright, thank you. S-Sorry, again." You stuttered before walking towards the elevator. Bucky wanted to come with you but he thought maybe this was going a bit fast for you. You already agreed to breakfast with other people in the room this morning, he didn't want to escalate things too quickly and add pressure to your shoulders. He knew you would ask him, like you did this morning, when you would be ready. He closed the door after seeing you disappear in the elevator.

  
  


You walked to the kitchen and there you had the surprise to find Thor.

"Oh trainee, hello." He smiled and waved at you.

"Hi." This is the last time you make this mistake, next time you'll ask Bucky to come.

"Come next to me, you have come to have lunch right?"

"Actually-" You tried to avoid him.

"If I looked like you I wouldn't leave the kitchen." Oh dear, he had done it. Everything you built up until now, the small amount of courage and confidence, it all crashed inside of you like a card castle in the wind. You ran out of the kitchen leaving a confused Thor behind.

You got out of the elevator and ran to your room as your tears filled your vision. But suddenly you bumped hard into somebody and fell on your butt.

"[Y/N]?" Bucky lent you his hand to help you back on your feet but you ignored him and slapped your door hard behind you as you entered your room. You stepped into the bathroom and shut another door behind you, putting as much distance as you could between you and everybody in this bloody tower. You dropped to your feet and cried again. One day. That's how long you've been here and you already cried twice. You didn't hear Bucky knock several times at your door but even if you did you wouldn't have opened this time. You just wanted to be alone.

"[Y/N], open please. What happened?" He almost missed it when you fell but he heard you sniffle when you got up and ran to your room. He knew you were crying. Bucky couldn't just leave you alone, not even five minutes ago you were knocking on his door with a smile on your face so what had happened between that small time lapse he took his eyes off you?

Since you weren't answering he decided to go to the kitchen, something must have happened there. He didn't even take the elevator he ran in the stairs and when he reached the kitchen he just found Thor who was happily munching on his food.

"What happened?" He asked Thor coldly.

"Oh Bucky, he-"

"What did you do to [Y/N]?" Thor looked confused.

"The trainee? I don't know, she came in here and then ran away. I asked her to join me." Bucky furrowed his brows. That couldn't be it, he knew how you were and you wouldn't have cried for something just like this.

"Did you say something else to her?" Thor tried to focus on the really short conversation he had with you.

"Uhh... I asked if she came for lunch-"

"And?"

"Ah, I remember. I told her I would spend all my time in here if I looked like her." Thor smiled completely oblivious.

"You what-" Bucky's eyes widened.

"Yeah, she's got a big body. She probably needs a lot of nutrients. My friends on Asgard would love her." Bucky sighed deeply. Thor meant no offense when he spoke to you but he didn't know the words he picked were the worst you could hear.

"Thor. That's... not something you say to women here."

"What do you mean?" Thor asked genuinely.

"Some women on Earth... They don't like these kind of comments about their bodies." He tried to explain.

"Midgardians are too sensitive." Thor huffed.

"Just. Don't talk to [Y/N] about her body again."

"Have I offended her?"

"Yes."

"Ah. I meant no offense. Where is she, I need to apologize." Thor said as he put his food down.

"Not right now. You can do that later. I'm gonna go see her." Bucky sighed as he left the kitchen. Yeah, next time he would come with you.

  
  


\---

  
  


Bucky came back in front of your door and knocked on it several times, in vain. You were still in the bathroom, on the floor and crying.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. unlock [Y/N]'s door." Bucky ordered to the AI.

"It already is." The AI replied. Bucky rolled his eyes before grabbing the doorknob and entering your room. He knew he shouldn't do this and it's a violation of your privacy but he couldn't leave you alone knowing you were sad.

"[Y/N]?" The winter soldier called out but he was met with silence. You weren't on your bed or in the room so there was just one place left where you could be. He walked towards the bathroom and knocked on it.

You raised your head when you heard the knocks. How could someone be in your room?

"Please, come out." You heard the familiar voice speak to you. You started crying again.

"Leave me alone." You said through the sobs through the door.

"That's out of the question. I'm not leaving until you come out." He spoke firmly.

"Please." You begged. "Just leave."

"No. I'll stay here all day if I have to." He said as he sat down and leaned against the wall next to the door. You took a deep breath and sighed.

"Why..." You let out. Why did this man you only met one day ago care? Why didn't he just close his eyes and walk away? Why was he so obstinate?

"I don't like knowing you sad. You don't deserve it."

"You don't know me." You replied.

"I've seen enough to know you're a good person." You bit onto your lower lip. "They told me about your powers since I wasn't there to see it." You kept listening and stopped crying. "I thought about what you told me last night, about how you got hurt by people around you while you have the power to heal. That's unfair. It hurts me to know you're hurting."

"Buck-" You started.

"Can you please come out?" He interrupted. "I feel stupid talking to your door." Your lips almost curved into a smile. You wiped your tears with your fingers and then reached for the door handle. Bucky heard the door open and waited for you to come out. You didn't so he peeked inside and found you on the floor, with puffy eyes and your nose scrunched. It probably wasn't the best time but he found you so adorable, his heart tightened in his chest. He crawled next to you and put his metal arm around your shoulders. You naturally leaned into him and hide your face against his chest as you felt your tears coming back again. "Hey, it's ok." His other arm joined your side and he hugged you against him as you cried on his torso.

"I-I'm sorry." You said quietly when you calmed down. You saw you had wet his tank top when you pulled your face away.

"Don't be." He reassured you with a smile. "I'm glad you opened for me." You blushed slightly. What was going on? Bucky noticed your cheeks redden but said nothing. "Say, do you wanna get out of here? Out of the tower I mean?"

"Wh- where? I don't know any place."

"I do. Come with me." He said as he got up and handed you his hand to help you up. You took it naturally. "I'm getting hungry and I don't feel like cooking. Let's go somewhere."

Ah, eating. You really didn't want to after what happened. Bucky saw your hesitation. "I promise you, it's gonna be just the two of us."

"What, like a date?" You let out with a dry laugh.

"It can be if you want." He winked at you.

"D-Don't be ridiculous." You stuttered. Who in their right mind would want anything to do with you? Bucky was probably just joking to ease the mood.

"C'mon, join me in front of your door in ten minutes." He concluded as he left you in your bathroom and left your room to change in his before going out.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!


	3. Sweet Escape

Bucky was already waiting for you when you got out of your room. You had changed into a pair of jeans, a shirt and picked up your jacket. You didn't want to hang around with your old clothes that reminded you of what happened in the kitchen. You walked next to Bucky and couldn't help staring at him. Did he always look so dreamy? It's as if you were looking at him for the first time. You noticed his beautiful and piercing light blue eyes, his square jaw and probably the softest hair you've ever seen. He also wore a shirt under his black leather jacket and God, why did everything he had to wear be so tight against his torso. You could pratically saw his abs. You coughed lightly to recompose yourself and hopefully not get caught staring at him.

"Where are we going?" You asked.

"I don't know yet. I just wanna get out of here."

"Yeah, feeling's mutual." You replied.

He pushed the elevator button and you made it to the parking lot.

"Let's borrow Tony's car." He said with challenge.

"Are we gonna get in trouble?" You asked.

"Only if we get caught." Bucky smirked at you. He opened the door of the luxurious car for you and you hesitated for a moment before finally giving in and going in the car. Bucky got in soon after you and turned it on.

"I'm pretty sure Tony heard his car roar from wherever he is in the tower." You warned Bucky.

"We better get out of there quick before he gets his suit then." Bucky chuckled. You put on your seatbelt and then you were out. You really needed this and you were thankful for the winter soldier.

  
  


Bucky's been driving for thirty minutes, he took the long roads, avoided the city and you had no idea where he was driving you to. You stared out the window, too nervous to say something. You're pretty sure that even if you wanted to you wouldn't know how to start a conversation. Thankfully the silence seemed to weight heavily on him too so he spoke.

"What do you feel like eating?" He asked you. You shrugged.

"I don't know."

"Why do you girls never know what you want to eat?" He joked.

"You been talking to a lot of girls?" You asked. He raised one of his eyebrows and smiled, watching the road. "Fine, we can go to McDonald's so I can grab a salad."

"Who goes to McDonald's for a salad?" He argued.

"I really don't have much appetite, Bucky." You said.

"I'm not letting you starve yourself until 2am like last night." He said to you. "I really need you to trust me and know you can be yourself around me. I'll never judge you about anything." Your heart tightened in your chest. You just weren't ready yet.

"I-I..." You started. "It's true, inside me I know you're not that type of person but I'm gonna ask you to please be patient. This really isn't something that comes from you. It's me, it's my problem." You said as you faced forward.

"And I want you to know you're not alone, not anymore. I can help you solve your problems, you don't have to do it on your own." He turned his head towards you.

"I really wish it was this easy."

"It can be."

"No. It's years of it. It can't get erased like this." You looked by the window again, staring at the scenery as you got lost in your thoughts, thinking back of the painful memories that haunted you. The warmth of Bucky's hand suddenly brought you back, you glanced at your thigh where your hand rested with now his hand on top of yours. You suddenly felt too hot and constricted against the seatbelt. You kept quiet and didn't dare move, you didn't want him to remove his hand. You appreciated the gesture.

"There's a drive-through, we can check it out if you want." He spoke as he watched the road, his hand not leaving yours.

"S-Sure..."

  
  


\---

  
  


"Tony's gonna kill us for eating in his car." You said to Bucky as you took a sip of your water bottle.

"He won't say anything as long as we don't dirt-" And at that moment he dropped a chicken nugget on the seat. That oil stain was so gonna get noticed by Tony.

"What were you saying?" You teased him.

"I should've taken a salad too." You smiled at him. Eating with your hands was just too risqué, especially in a car.

"Don't worry, I'll come at your funeral. Someone's gotta be there for Steve." You teased.

"Oh, he's the only one who's gonna miss me?" Bucky said to you in a fake offended voice. You smiled shyly as you blushed.

"We gotta go back to the tower." You said as you looked away from his face.

"Nah, you reply first."

"And what do you want me to say?" You rolled your eyes.

"Only the truth." He looked at your face.

"Fine." You crossed your arms on your chest. "M-Maybe I will miss you." You confessed as you avoided his gaze. His lips curved into a smile as he stared at you.

"C'mon, give me your trash to throw away and let's head back before Tony sends the whole Avengers after us for stealing his car." You giggled quietly as you handed him your paper bag.

  
  


The ride back home was much more lively than when you got out. You turned on the radio and you both sang to a few songs that played, cracked a few jokes and imagined the worst things Tony could do to you guys which made you howl with laughter. You really had a great time with Bucky and you were thankful he helped you.

As you made it back to the Stark tower parking lot, before you could reach for the door Bucky stopped you.

"I know it's probably not a good time right now but I have to tell you. Before I came into your room earlier I went to the kitchen and spoke with Thor." The smile you had on your face vanished with all the life from it and Bucky felt bad. "Wait, let me finish."

"I don't want to speak about him."

"I know, just listen. Please." He begged with his puppy eyes and it was just impossible to say no to that.

"Fine." You sighed.

"He meant no offense." He started.

"If you're just gonna defend your frie-"

"What? No. When I went in the kitchen I was ready to figh-" Your eyes widened. "That's not the point." Bucky grabbed your hand again in his to calm you. "I guess you know but Thor is not from Earth. What he said to you, it wasn't in a vile way to mock you. He explained it to me. Of course that doesn't excuse everything." You took a deep breath. Deep inside you knew you've heard enough about Thor to know he wasn't a mean person. Maybe it was indeed a misunderstanding. "And he wanted to search for you to apologize but in the state you were in I told him it wasn't a good time."

"Yeah, you were right." You smiled sadly. "So basically I overreacted."

"That's not my point at all. And if it got you worked up like that it means that it mattered to you and it's not unimportant. I know what you went through and I'll always be on your side." You raised your eyes to look at him. No one had ever taken your side before.

"O-Okay... I understand. Thank you Bucky." You said softly in a voice that melted his heart. Then the winter soldier gently leaned in on you and you saw him hesitate before he kissed your cheek. You let out a quiet gasp, not expecting his action.

"Come now, we have to face Tony." He said to you jokingly as he opened the door. But as your face reddened you couldn't stop thinking about his lips on your skin. Bucky opened the door on your side and you got out, your legs were shaking a bit.

  
  


You got out of the elevator and walked in what seemed like a living room if you were in a normal appartment but in the Stark tower it was much more than that. This was definitively for parties. A few members of the Avengers were there looking at you and Bucky suspiciously as you walked in.

"Hey." Nat started. "Where have you two... been?" They didn't know you yet but they sure as hell weren't used to, out of all people, Bucky going out with someone else.

"Uh..." Bucky started. "We needed to get some fresh air so we went out to eat."

"Really?" Steve added.

"Just the two of you?" Nat continued. "Like a date?"

"Not a date." You said. Bucky shrugged and you glared at him. Nat looked at both of you with a small smirk on her lips. "I'm gonna go change." You threw quickly before somebody else asks a new question. Bucky waved at you and you rolled your eyes.

"What are you doing?" Steve asked his best friend.

"What do you mean?" Bucky replied.

"That and grinning like that. What is going on?"

"I told you, we went out to eat."

"Uh huh..." Nat stared into his eyes in hope to catch whatever hint Bucky could let slip out.

"Please just ask me whatever questions you both are having a hard time holding back." Bucky sighed.

"Was it a date?" Steve started.

"Did you make out?" Nat continued.

"We didn't put a word on it and no we didn't." Bucky replied truthfully. Steve and Nat exchanged glances. Well, this was a first.

"How did this thing even begin between you both?" Nat asked.

"We're floor neighbors."

"I see. So you visit each other's rooms or something?" Nat continued.

"She didn't come to mine yet." Bucky realized his mistake too lately.

"But you went to hers?" Steve raised his eyebrows. "And what do you mean 'yet'?"

"I feel exhausted I'm gonna take a nap." Bucky left into the hallway.

"Oh no, you come back here Buck." Steve followed him.

"I have to talk to the new girl." Nat thought out loud.

  
  


\---

  
  


After changing into more comfortable clothes you were chilling on your bed, reading the book you borrowed earlier in the library. Could we call that reading though? Distraction sounded more accurate. You were trying not to think because God knows what happens when you're left alone in your thoughts and today **a lot** happened. Though one thing you couldn't understand was Bucky's behavior around you. You've never been through this before. Someone being especially nice to you, caring for you and just being generally pleasant around you. What was his problem?

Yes, you liked being around him but you couldn't understand how it seemed like he liked being around you too. In all your twenty-five years of living you had never met someone that acted like Bucky with you. It couldn't be your looks because you knew what you looked like and it wasn't pretty. You had only known him for a day so he couldn't have find you particulary funny or interesting so what was it? Why was he acting like- You closed your eyes. Like he liked you? You quickly chased the thought away. It was impossible and thinking deeply about it would just end up hurting you. Maybe he just felt sad for you and pitied you. This had to be the only logical explanation.

Suddenly a knock on your door got you out of your reverie. You put your book down and went to open the door of your room.

"T-Thor?" You were surprised to find the Asgardian at your door.

"Evening, Midgardian." He took your hand. He looked nervous somehow? "I have come to get you. I mean, we are all gathered downstairs and you were missing so I proposed to escort you."

"Oh. Uh, I-I don't kn-"

"Please accept. You must be feeling alone in your room." That wasn't completely true but not so false either. After all what was to lose? At worst you could still retreat to your room anytime.

"Alright, I'll come." You said. Thor smiled at you but didn't release your hand.

"I have also been informed that I hurt your feelings earlier today and so I wanted to properly apologize to you. I meant no offense in the words I have used against you." The Asgardian looked straight into your eyes.

"It's fine, Thor, really. I accept your apology." You smiled shyly at him. "Let's forget this happened, okay?"

"Thank you. Shall we?" He let go of your hand and offered you his arm. You closed the door behind you and took his arm as you walked towards the elevator.

  
  


You were brought again to what you called the "living space" as it was too big to fit the normal title. Everyone was scattered around a bit, some members sitting on the couch and others on the floor. As you and Thor walked in everyone smiled in your direction.

"I have successfully brought the lady." Thor announced to his pals. Bucky didn't miss your arm around Thor's.

"The more the merrier!" Tony said with a grin. You were surprised he didn't say anything about the car but then you crossed eyes with Bucky who somehow hinted you that Tony didn't hear about you both's getaway. You let go of Thor's arm and discreetly joined the winter soldier on the couch.

"He doesn't know?" You whispered to him.

"I don't think so. Looks like we got lucky this time." He said with a grin. You felt bad about hiding this to Tony but it's not like you crashed his car or something. It was still intact.

"So, [Y/N]..." Suddenly Tony's voice made you jump. "What have you been up to?" Oh God, did he actually know and he was testing you? You became nervous. You weren't a good liar and you didn't know how long you c-

"Her and Bucky went on a date." Nat let out and suddenly everyone around you became silent.

"What? Really?" Tony asked a bit surprised, he crossed eyes with Steve who didn't deny it either.

"T-That's-" You stuttered as you felt your face become red. Oh God, you were screwed. You stared at Bucky asking for help.

"We just ate out." The winter soldier explained.

"Yeah, just the two of you guys... A date." Bruce added as he looked at Bucky.

"C'mon. She could've gone with any of you guys." Bucky tried defending you the best he could. He really did.

"She didn't eat with me when I proposed." Thor added. Did you just fall into a trap or something? You wanted to disappear.

"Where did you both go anyway?" Tony asked.

"To a drive-through, nothing romantic. We took your car and-" You grabbed Bucky's wrist, alas it was too late.

"You WHAT-" Tony shouted. Nat and Steve had trouble keeping their laughter quiet.

"Great. Good job Buck." You told him.

"Buck?" He repeated.

"Aw, they're having their first argument." Nat joked.

"Tut tut tut, we're talking about my car here." Tony interrupted. "Which-" He took a deep breath. "Which car?"

"I don't know? Looked luxurious, was comfy..." You let out. "But we didn't ruin it or anything I swear."

"I dropped my chicken nugget though." You glared at Bucky as suddenly a roar of laughter was heard from Thor, Bruce, Nat and Steve's side.

"YOU ATE IN MY CAR?!" You heard glass shatter in the middle of the laughs and you jumped on Tony.

"Oh my god." He had broken the champagne flute he was holding in his hand. "Open your goddamn hand." You ordered him in a severe voice. He obeyed you as he looked at your face, you could tell he was still angry but his hand mattered the most now.

"Steve, get the first aid kit" Nat said to him.

"Ugh, no need to." You told them. You removed some of the broken pieces of glass with your fingers and when most of them were gone you took his bloody hand in yours. You closed your eyes and concentrated on the several cuts on his palm. Fifteen seconds passed and you released his hand. All new. The cuts disappeard and the tiniest pieces of glass that got in his wounds rested in his palm now.

"Wow." Bucky let out. It was the first time he saw you using your power. He almost couldn't believe it, it was the most powerful thing he's ever seen. Tony stared at his hand while the others had their eyes on you.

"I'm going to bed, goodnight." You spat out as you got up and walked out of the room. Bucky sighed before following you.

He joined you in front of the elevator and raised his arms in sign of surrender when you glared at him.

"Just wanted to make sure you were okay." He spoke softly.

"I don't like being the center of the attention." You said. Bucky nodded.

"Can I walk you back to your room?" He asked with a smile.

"We're on the same floor, what are you playing at?" You rolled your eyes. He offered you his arm and you looked at him with a funny expression.

"Oh, so only Thor has the privilege of offering you his arm?" He teased.

"Wh- are you jealous or something?" You didn't let him reply as you were asking jokingly and took his arm. But yes, he was jealous indeed.

"After you, my lady." Bucky joked after the elevator doors opened.

"I've known you for twenty-four hours and I already can't stand you." You huffed. You tried to softly let go of his arm in the elevator but he kept you still.

"We haven't reached your chambers yet." Bucky reminded you. He smiled as you laughed quietly next to him.

You had finally reached your floor. The elevator doors opened, Bucky held your hand for you to step out first then followed you and replaced your arm on his. He walked you to your door and finally released your arm. Or you thought so. He delicately took your hand in his and brought it to his lips. He kissed the back of your hand while maintening eye contact with you. A chill ran down your spine as you suddenly felt too cold and too hot. Your face was burning, no one had ever done something like this to you.

"Thank you for today. I had fun." He said to you as he placed your hand back next to your body.

"I-I..." You were speechless. Bucky smirked, he hid it from you but he loved seeing your flustered reactions. The winter soldier knew this was bad, he could quickly get addicted to it.

"Goodnight, doll."

 


	4. A Help

"What the fuck is going on?" You whispered to yourself after you closed the door of your room and laid on your bed. You raised the arm Bucky held a few seconds ago above your head and stared at the back of your hand. Your stomach was doing backflips and your body temperature still hasn't dropped back to normal. Then you thought back about what he said. What he called you precisely. Doll. A non fitting word to describe you in your opinion. Dolls were delicate, pretty and gracious, you, you were just.. **you**. Not these things at all. So what was the winter soldier's deal? What game was he playing? You turned around in your bed and shoved your face deeply against your pillow. That's it, you were going crazy.

You got up and walked to your closet to grab your pyjamas. You tried really hard to stop overthink about Bucky but God, it was damn hard. There was no way in hell somewhere in your mind you could think that Bucky fancied you. It was just impossible. He was him, hot, strong, funny, charming, kind, basically just perfect and you were... not. A part of you wished he could stop acting like that around you so you wouldn't accidentally catch feelings and hurt your already aching heart but another part really loved the attention he was giving you. No one had ever paid attention to you, the only times you got noticed was to get bullied by others. Bucky was warm and his entire being healed you. You loved to hang out with him. You loved how he was somehow always looking after you. You loved the way he smiled. You loved-

Your eyes closed and you fell into a deep sleep.

  
  


\---

  
  


You stepped into the kitchen and there you only found Steve. It didn't surprise you he would be the one out of all the Avengers members to be up first and prepare breakfast for everyone.

"Hey, Steve." You threw with a sleepy voice.

"Good morning, [Y/N]. Fell out of bed?"

"I could ask you the same question." The captain grinned. "Can I help you?" You asked.

"Uh, sure. Thanks for proposing."

"No problem."

"You can set the table." He instructed you. You walked toward the cabinets and picked a few plates and mugs. As you were working he suddenly spoke. "By the way..." He started. "I hope we didn't make you uncomfortable last night."

"Don't worry about it." You said to him.

"The tower is big but we get bored pretty quickly so we poke a lil fun at each other. It's never with mean attentions but I'd understand, since you're new, if you don't like it." He stared into your eyes with a kind expression.

"I know you guys are nice people, really. I'm okay." You reassured Steve. It was the truth. Sure you didn't like being the center of attention but you know they weren't mocking you in _that_ way.

"And if I can be truly honest with you we were mostly teasing Bucky. Trust me before you came we could barely see him. It's good you guys are getting to know each other." You blushed slightly, focusing on your work and avoiding Steve's eyes. So did Bucky use to avoid people too?

"Yeah, he's nice." You replied to not leave a blank.

"Never thought someone here could call Bucky that." Steve chuckled. "I think he likes you too." You dropped a plate and the sound of it being shattered on the ground made Steve immeditely run to you." Are you okay?"

"Yeah, yeah." You said as you dropped down and started picking the pieces of the broken plate. "It slipped out of my- ouch!" You accidentally cut your palm with a piece. "Ah, damn it." You got up and walked to the sink to wash your hand from the blood.

"Hey, what happened? I heard something break." Bruce announced as he walked into the kitchen.

"I'm sorry, I broke a plate." You explained.

"Don't worry about that. How's your hand?" Steve asked you with worry.

"I'll survive. I'm gonna get a bandage." You said as you turned off the faucet.

"Wait, why don't you just use your power?" Bruce asked. You smiled.

"It doesn't work on me." You revealed.

"What? Really?" Steve asked.

"That's sadly ironic." Bruce added. You sighed as you nodded.

"Uh, can you guys tell me where you put the first aid kit?" You asked.

"I'll go fetch that for you." Bruce said as he walked out.

"I'm so useless, I'm sorry." You huffed as you dropped on a chair.

"Hey, why are you saying that? It's just a plate, we got plenty." Steve kneeled in front of you.

"I can't heal myself."

"Neither can we." He reassured you with a smile. "You're gonna be a big help to the Avengers, your powers could save us in dangerous missions." You raised your eyes to look at him. At that moment Dr. Banner came back and handed Steve the kit. "Open your hand for me please." You let the captain clean your cut and wrap a bandage around your hand. "Here you go [Y/N]."

"Thank you. Both of you." You smiled at Steve and Bruce. "I'm gonna clean this mess."

"Let me handle it, just sit down." The doctor said to you. Steve crossed eyes with you as to say you better not move from that seat.

"Good morning everybody!" Tony cheered. You turned your head to wave at him, Nat following behind him.

"What's up?" She asked. Steve grinned.

"I made pancakes." He said excitedly. Nat rolled her eyes with a small smile on her face.

"What happened to your hand?" Tony asked as he sat next to you.

"It's nothing, small accident." You replied.

"[Y/N] can't use her powers on herself." Bruce said to Tony before he could ask.

"Oh. Fury didn't mention that to me."

"I... don't think he knows." You said. "People have seen me heal others but I never got wounded so they couldn't have guessed. I think they just assume I do."

"That's an information he needs to know, in case you join us in a mission. We can't risk to lose you. You'll need protection. F.R.I.D.A.Y. send an email to Nick Fury with what was just said in this conversation." Tony ordered.

"Yes, boss." The AI replied.

"Tony, I-I wanted to apologize for yesterday. For using your car and-" He raised a hand to silence you.

"Forget it, you did nothing wrong. Bucky, on the other hand..."

"Please don't be mad at him if you're not mad at me." You begged Tony. "I'm as much responsible as he is. We went out because I needed fresh air. He just helped." Tony stared into your eyes for a moment before sighing.

"Fine. I'll let it slide because you healed my hand." A bright smile appeard on your face.

"Thank you so much, I promise we won't take your car again!" You swore to him.

"Morning." You heard a low voice mumble. You expected to see Thor appear at the door but it was Bucky. He looked like he fell out of bed after one horrible night, he had bags under his eyes and his hair was disheveled. (What had happened to him?) You worried. You saw Steve turn his head towards his best friend and mouth an "Again?" and Bucky just nodded. Whatever had happened to him seemed like it wasn't his first time.

"Gather around everybody, the pancakes are ready!" Steve announced with a smile. Bucky dropped on the seat next to yours, it didn't seem like he recognized you.

"Hey." You whispered to him as everyone was shuffling around you both, taking their seats and pouring coffee in their mug. You reached for him, gently putting your hand on his forearm. Bucky slowly turned his head, his eyes widening a bit when he recognized you. He didn't expect to see you in the dining room with the team.

"Hi." He greeted you with a smile. You could see a wrinkle on his forehead despite his gentle expression, it seemed like he had a headache.

"Are you okay?" You worried. You instinctly reached to touch his face but as sudden realization hit you about what you were about to do you brought your hand back to yourself. Not quick enough though.

"Doll?!" He seized your wrist with an anxious expression." What happened to you?"

Nat was watching you both and she nudged Steve with her knee, pointing her chin towards you and the winter soldier. She then turned her head towards the captain and hid her mouth with her palm "He called her doll." she whispered to Steve who widened his eyes as he discreetly started watching you too.

Your stomach did a backflip again at the tender nickname. "I-It's nothing, don't worry about me. What about you though? You look like you had a terrible night."

"Yeah... It happens." You stared at him. He let go of your wrist and took your hand between his. Your heart was racing and you could feel your blood rush to your face. You got up suddenly, startling Bucky and Tony who were sitting next to you.

"I-I forgot my milk." You said as all the stares were focused on you. You walked to the fridge, ignoring their gaze. Bucky raised his head and faced forward. He was met with Steve and Nat looking at him with a smirk in the corner of their mouth. He rolled his eyes and reached for his mug of coffee. You came back to your seat and focused on your glass of milk, trying to calm the quick pace of your heartbeats down. "So, uh..." You wanted to clear away the blank. "Where's Thor?" Bucky raised his eyebrow, surprised you'd ask after the God of thunder.

"You'll probably never catch him have breakfast with us, he likes to sleep through morning." Bruce said.

After that everyone started digging into their plates, Steve made sure you helped yourself to some of his pancakes and despite your hesitation first you finally ate, relieved and happy everyone was treating you well and no one made any displeasant comments to you. They didn't even seem to pay attention and you honestly couldn't ask for better, it's all you ever wanted. You glanced at Bucky from time to times and noticed he was holding his head between his hands sometimes. You weren't sure if you could help, you had never tried to heal "mental aches" before. You probably couldn't heal psychological wounds but maybe you could help relieve a bit of the pain from the headache. You turned your chair to face him.

"Can I?" You asked him in a whisper. Bucky wasn't sure what you wanted to do but he nodded anyway, trusting you. "Face me." You said to him. He turned his body towards you, you slowly moved your hands up and delicately put your fingers on each side of his head against his temples. You closed your eyes to focus on the pain. It helped you to visualize it, though this was harder since it wasn't a cut or a wound that you could clearly see.

But you felt it, you could sense it was there. His pain. When you found it you cleared your own head and focused on it. Everything was silent around you, there was nobody except you and Bucky. You were afraid but you trusted your power and your own instinct to not fry his brain's out. You knew there was a risk to what you were doing but seeing him look so tortured was a sight you couldn't stand. You wanted to help him like he helped you. You had unconsciously come closer to him until your foreheads met. Soon you felt fingers gently wrap around your wrists and put your hands down.

"It doesn't hurt anymore." You heard Bucky speak and that made you open your eyes, immediately realizing where you were. You backed up quickly and looked around you, a blush crept on your cheeks as everyone had their eyes fixed on you. You had trouble breathing suddenly, you needed to get out.

"I-I'm s-sorry." You stuttered as you got up from your seat and walked quickly out of the room. Steve wanted to reassure you it was fine but you were already out.

"She just doesn't like being the center of the attention." Bucky explained to the others.

"How's your head?" Steve asked.

"It's... I don't know, incredible. No pills had ever cleared the pain away like this. Like she just did." Bucky replied.

"It's really an amazing ability." Bruce added.

"Indeed." Said Nat.

"Welp, I gotta discuss with Fury about a few things." Tony said as he got up. "I'll see you later."

  
  


\---

  
  


You closed the door of your room behind you and dropped on your bed. You were shaking and had trouble breathing. You curled up on one side of your body and closed your eyes. You took long deep breath to calm yourself down. You were fine, everything was okay you repeated to yourself. After a few minutes you had calmed down and you were breathing normally. Your body felt weak though, it happened sometimes after healing big wounds but this couldn't be the case, Bucky just had a headache. Maybe it was because it was a mental injury this time? You had never tried to heal those before so maybe you just needed practice.

You closed your eyes to rest, after all you had nothing planned this morning and you didn't feel like reading. Soon you were the one who was going to get a headache. You cleared your head and let sleep slowly take you in.

  
  


\---

  
  


"I got your email about [Y/N]'s powers and the pancakes." Nick Fury was facetiming Tony about his report.

"The pancakes? Right, I told F.R.I.D.A.Y. to send you the conversation." Tony sighed. "Anyway, she needs protection if she's gonna come along in missions. She's just human and I doubt she has combat skills like Natasha."

"For now she's not joining the Avengers, I told you to put her in the tower because she's socially awkward and she needs to get familiarized with the team. How's that going by the way?" Fury asked.

"Good i'd say, though I didn't spend most of the time with her. Between us if you wanna ask someone you should go to Bucky." Tony confessed.

"The winter soldier?" Fury asked, his brows furrowing.

"You're not the only one surprised, we all are. But yeah, they seem to get along. Steve is making sure she's comfortable too. It's going well."

"Alright. She might join if I put you guys in a small mission to see how she handles it. So don't go building her a suit or something for now, she's forbidden from joining dangerous work. We can't afford to lose her, that ability is a huge bonus for us."

"Understood. Well, I'll let you know if there's more."

"We'll stay in touch, Stark." Nick ended the call.

Tony grinned. "Building her a suit?" He thought out loud. "F.R.I.D.A.Y. we got work to do." He walked to his lab as he hummed happily.

  
  


\---

  
  


A few sudden knocks at your door woke you up from your nap. What time was it? You got up as you rubbed your eyes awake and opened the door.

"Yes?" You asked in a tired voice.

"Ah, sorry. Did I wake you up?" Bucky was standing at your door, he looked better than this morning.

"Oh Bucky. Sorry, yeah I was."

"You don't have to apologize." He smiled at you. "I'm the one who was bothering."

"No, no, it's fine. You did well. What time is it even?"

"Uh, around 2pm?" Your eyes widened.

"What?! Already... I feel like it's been forty-five minutes. I'll put an alarm next time." Bucky chuckled softly as he looked at you. "I'm sorry, did you need something?" You asked.

"You didn't come for lunch so I, uh... I was wondering where you were." He worried about you but he didn't want to trouble you with that so he hid the truth from you. You smiled timidly at that.

"You don't need to care about that, trust me I'll always find a way for food." You giggled slightly.

"Look at you, joking about yourself and food. Who are you and what did you do with my [Y/N]?" You blushed instantly at that. His [Y/N] he said...

"I-I don't know, maybe [Y/N] doesn't feel much like a prey to everyone around her anymore and she's starting to feel more comfortable?" You couldn't help the smile on your face. It was true, recently you really felt more relaxed and even trusting towards the team.

"Well, I'm very happy for you." Bucky said to you as he gently replaced a strand of your hair behind your ear. Your heart raced fast inside your chest. "I also wanted to thank you for earlier. My headache, it's much better."

"It's really no problem. My power is the reason I'm in this tower. I'm glad I could be useful to you." You told him as you avoided his gaze.

"Is that the reason you did it?" Bucky asked you as he stared into your eyes. You gulped. He catched your hesitation. "Remember? Only the truth."

"I didn't like seeing you with a tortured expression, it hurt me. That's why I proposed to help before anyone ordered me to or before it got worse." You confessed in a quiet voice. Bucky smiled again. "I would've tried even if you refused my help." You spoke too quickly.

Bucky approached you and wrapped his flesh arm around your head holding you close against his chest. You closed your eyes and listened to his heartbeat, ignoring yours beating even quicker. The embrace felt warm and he smelled good. Suddenly you felt him kiss your forehead and you instinctly gripped the hem of his tank top in one of your hands. Your body froze, you felt too hot, it was like you were about to have a stroke and you needed to cling on anything.

"Ah, Buck. I was searching for you." Oh God, you didn't hear the elevator doors open and Steve's footsteps coming towards you both. You immediately let Bucky go and took a few steps back in your room. You crossed eyes with Steve and you knew that he saw you and Bucky and Steve knew that he walked onto something.

"I'll see you later, doll." Bucky said to you with a smile and a wink, not a care in the world if Steve saw you two or not. After all he was his best friend and he had nothing shameful to hide. You closed the door, hiding your red face from the two super soldiers.

"Did- Was I interrupting something?" Steve asked Bucky.

"Who knows?" He replied with a grin.

 


	5. Truth or dare?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know the "with great power comes great responsabilities" line is from spiderman but please bare with me.

You and the team were all gathered in the living space, sharing a few drinks and snacks. It was another quiet night in the Stark tower with no missions in sight or enemies to stop. Now it's been around a week since you started living here and despite the difficult start you were finally integrated to the team and you got along with each member of it, even Thor. Nothing had escalated between you and the winter soldier, when no one was looking you'd catch yourself be clinging on his arm or sometimes he'd make small moves on his side and kiss your cheek gently but it was just that.

"Hey, do you guys wanna play truth or dare?" Nat asked.

"Oh, sounds fun!" Thor said.

"Aren't we too old for that?" Bruce said.

"Speak for yourself old man, I'm in." Tony replied. Nat crossed eyes with you and raised her left eyebrow.

"Sure." You said with a smile.

"Great because I already know everything about these guys." Nat said to you as she put her glass down.

"How long do you guys keep on hazing me?" You said with a slight chuckle.

"Until we get busy with work? Maybe longer than that?" Nat teased you with a wink. You crossed eyes with Steve and Bucky who were sitting in front of you and looked at you with a reassuring smile. You knew everyone in the room were going to ask personal questions to get to know you better but you also trusted them to not make you actually feel terrible at the end of the game.

"Alright, go on with your questions." You capitulate as you sink further into your seat.

"Hmm, let's start very easy. What's your favorite season?"

"Winter." You replied almost immediately. Bucky raised one of his eyebrows as he took a sip from his glass. Tony snickered next to you. "Oh, c'mon. I just prefer colder temperatures, in summer you get sweaty and it's too hot to do anything." Nat said nothing as she smirked but everyone knew what was going on.

"Why are you guys laughing, I don't get it?" Thor said.

"Just, forget it." Steve said to him.

"Alright, your turn. Ask us something." Nat continued.

"Okay. Hmm? What would you say is the hardest thing about this job?"

"Wow, way to ruin the mood [Y/N]." Tony said with a fake offended voice. "You mean despite the fact that any of us can die at any moment?"

"Alright, it got sad real quick." Bruce said.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to ruin the mood. I just wondered if you guys had regrets about becoming Avengers." You said.

"I think the sad part is that we don't actually choose to become Avengers, we just do." Steve replied to you. "With great power-"

"Comes great responsibility." You finished Steve's sentence. He smiled to you. "Alright, that's good enough for me."

"Next question. Anyone wanna go?"

"I'll do an easy one too." Started Bruce. "If you could trade your power with anybody in this room, who would you pick?"

"Oh, interesting." You took a few seconds to think. "Thor." The God of thunder raised his head in pride and grinned before throwing you a wink. "I mean, not gonna lie, the hammer looks cool."

"Yeah, it does." Tony let out.

"Ok, my turn." You said. "Did something ever happen between you guys?"

"Oh, you wanna play it like this huh?" Nat laughed.

"I don't think so..." Thor thought about it.

"Didn't something happen between you and Bruce?" Tony asked Nat. You saw Bruce sink into his seat, he looked kinda uncomfortable.

"I don't know, wrong time, wrong moment. Whatever was there quickly died." Nat replied truthfully as she took a sip of her drink.

"Haha, no need to look so uncomfortable my friend." Thor patted Bruce with strength on his shoulder.

"Alright [Y/N]. We're done being nice. Who did you share your last kiss with and did you enjoy it?" Nat asked you while looking straight into your eyes. Bucky glanced discreetly at you as you immediately blushed and stared at your feet.

"I-I..." Oh, fuck. "I... never had my first kiss." You let out embarrassed. Suddenly there was a blank. Nat's jaw dropped.

"No way..." She said.

"But you're twenty-five." Thor added.

"Yes, indeed I am." You sighed. "And yes, it's awkward."

"I-It's fine-" Steve started but you silenced him.

"Please don't start pitying me over this, it's fine. Let's just say I'm waiting for the right person and I haven't met them yet."

"Or maybe you did." Nat said as she guided her eyes from you to Bucky. You sighed as you rolled your eyes.

"So, you haven't-"

"Thor, I swear if you finish this question..." You threatened. Tony tried so hard to hold back a laugh.

"What about you Bucky?" Nat asked. "You've been awfully silent. I bet there's some questions you wanna ask [Y/N], right?" She looked at him. The winter soldier repositioned himself in his seat.

"Yes, there is." He crossed eyes with you. "Tell us about your past." You took a sip of your drink before replying.

"Alright but it's about to become terribly sad in here." You replied as you looked back at Bucky.

"Give us your best shot." Tony challenged you. You took a deep breath.

"Alright so before I came here, as Tony explained to you the first day we met, I used to heal with my powers literally anyone or anything who crossed my path and needed my help until I met that SHIELD agent and you guys know the rest. Before that I used to live with my family in a small village. It was so small everyone knew each other and so gossiped about each other too. As you guys noticed the first time you saw me..." You unconsciously crossed eyes with the winter soldier again. "I'm fat and I used to get bullied a lot for it. Not only by random strangers, that would've been too easy..." You said with a sad smile as you stared at your feet. "But by my family too. It was always mean nicknames and comments about what I ate and as people kept bullying me I found comfort in food." You paused for a second as you rememberd the horrible memories, triggering you like war flashbacks for a soldier. "And one day, my powers manifested. By the way no need to ask me how I got them, I have no idea and no one in my village was capable of doing what I do."

"[Y/N]..-"

"No, don't interrupt me." You said, you didn't know who just spoke as you were staring in front of you and not at their faces. "One time I got into a fight with a girl who kept bullying me and I had enough so I pushed her and she fell on the ground, her knee got scratched pretty badly and she started screaming. I knew I was gonna get in trouble so I started crying and I approached her to apologize but then I accidentally fell and my palms touched her wound." You took another pause. "I thought I hurt her even more but she stopped yelling and when I took my hands off... the wound was gone. No bruises, no blood, nothing. I stared at my hands in shock and the next thing I remember is her mother who saw everything and she started calling me a monster. The word quickly spread out and soon after my..." You didn't realize your hands were shaking. "My family kicked me out. Probably tired of having an ugly demon like me as daughter. I took a backpack that I filled with a few things and ran away. I never looked back. I survived until then by finding wealthy people to heal, I asked for a little money in exchange of my powers and before they could get their hands on me I ran away again. Poor people and animals I healed them for free and then I met that agent who reported about me to Fury. That's it, that's my past." You concluded. You realized you were crying when a tear fell on the back of your hand. You discreetly wiped your eyes and then raised your head to face their reaction. What you saw moved you, they had tears in their eyes too.

"People are so awful." You heard Thor speak. "If you tell me where this village is, I'll be glad to give them a taste of my hammer." You let out a dry laugh.

"That's nice of you to say... I think? But don't worry, the time I spent here was the happiest I've been and to be honest, I don't wanna think of my past anymore. Ever."

"You were not a demon in that village, you were an angel and they were too stupid to realize it." Bucky spoke and you felt tears coming back again.

"I told you it was about to get sad." You told them with a small smile. Tony wrapped his arm around your shoulders and brought you close to him. You were surprised but it didn't feel bad. He hugged you and smiled at you as he gently released you.

"How about we take a small break?" Nat asked. "But we're not finishing on that note. We'll continue in ten minutes."

You got up and walked towards the balcony, you needed fresh air. You felt like you were suffocating in there. As you walked out you took a deep breath, the chilly air of the night immediately soothing you. You stared at all the small dots of light in front of you, the night sky was starry and beautiful. Suddenly you felt an arm wrap around your waist, you turned around to see who it was. Bucky. He wrapped his two muscular arms around your body and hugged you tightly against him. He said nothing as he held you. You felt good. His embrace was comforting and warm. You hadn't realized you needed this. Your arms timidly wrapped around him too.

"Thank you." You whispered.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have asked you in front of everyone." You backed up a little to look at his face, he had the same expression he wore on his face when he had his headache. Tortured and sad. It hurt you, you couldn't stand it.

"No, you did me a favor. I'm not sure I would've opened to everybody if you didn't ask. It was the perfect occasion and I'm glad I got it off my chest." You said to him with a reassuring smile. He released your waist but then took both of your hands in his.

"I promise you, as long as I'm here, no one will ever hurt you again. I won't let anybody do it. Not even any members of the Avengers." The winter soldier brought your hands to his lips and gently kissed them. Your stomach did a backflip again. You were thankful the darkness of the night hid your face because you were as red as a beet. Bucky let go of your hands. "C'mon let's get back before you catch a cold."

"I told you winter is my favorite season. I don't mind being cold." You smiled at him.

"I'm not letting you get sick under my watch, doll." He put his hand behind your back and pushed you gently inside. You followed him as you saw the others gathering back too.

"Alright, back again. Now let the fun finally begin." Nat said. "[Y/N], I think it's your turn to ask a question." Bucky sat next to you this time.

"Tony." You said as you turned your head towards him.

"Yes, sweetheart?" He replied with a smirk, probably expecting an easy question from you.

"Have you ever built something to use in bed? And yes, I mean in the sexual way." Nat and Thor let out a laugh.

"I take back the 'sweetheart'." Tony said. He sighed deeply. "Yes."

"Holy shit." You let out. "I can't believe it." You took a sip from your drink.

"Alright, my turn. We're finally getting serious here." Nat said. "[Y/N], who do you feel the closest to here?"

"That's your question? Even Steve can answer it." Tony spat out. You rolled your eyes.

"Obviously, Bucky." At the mention of his name he turned his head towards you and grinned.

"I'll ask one now." Tony said, well decided to take his revenge for the embarrasing question. "[Y/N], what's your favorite physical trait about Bucky?"

"Ohh, good one." Nat threw to Tony. Ah, crap. You felt a blush creeping on your cheeks so you took another sip from your cold drink to give yourself some courage.

"H-His... arms." You let out. Bucky raised one of his eyebrows, surprised by the answer.

"It's getting kinda hot in there or am I the only one?" As if to tease you Bucky took off his jacket and put it next to him. He was only wearing a tight tank top under it. Okay, this was clearly an attack.

"I hate you." You whispered to him in a joking tone. He kept staring into your eyes with a grin on his face.

"Wait, we don't have to ask questions just to [Y/N] right? Buck, what's _your_ favorite physical trait about [Y/N]?" Steve smirked to his best friend.

"Oh, party Steve mode is on." Nat and Tony chuckled. Bucky took a few seconds to think which made you a bit nervous. You didn't even know if he could find **anything** attractive about you.

"The way her nose scrunch up when she's upset." He replied which immediately made your face blush.

"Oh, shut up." You said to him as you lightly slapped his biceps with your hand.

"See? She's doing it again, it's so adorable." He laughed in such a lively way that it made your heart miss a beat. You crossed your arms on your chest and backed up into the couch, wanting to disappear. You were so embarrassed. Nat crossed eyes with the other Avengers as you and Bucky were too busy quarreling to see them exchange approved glances and smirks.

"Okay, enough with the questions. Let's do some dares now." Nat said.

"It's way too late for me, I'm gonna wish you all a goodnight." Bruce said as he got up.

"Coward." Thor huffed to the doctor.

"Yeah, it's time for me too." Added Tony. "Don't stay up too late kids."

"Well, it's just the five of us I guess. There's still plently to have fun. Everyone still in?" You all nodded to that. You were having fun until now so why stop? "And this time feel free to ask anybody, not just [Y/N]." Everyone nodded again.

"I'll go first." Thor started. "Natasha, I dare you to finish your glass while you're standing on your hands."

"No problem." She accepted the challenge. "Come and hold my legs though." You all moved from your seats to give her space. She proceeded to do a headstand and when her legs were in the air Thor came to her side and held her with one hand. Steve handed her her glass that was sitting on the table and then she drank it. Thor released her legs and Nat stood up back on her feet. "Tadaa!" You all clapped with laughs. "Okay, my turn." She said. "[Y/N], I dare you to give Bucky a hickey on his neck." You went red again but you were not the only one, the winter soldier blushed too. God, you had never done this before.

"O-Okay..." You said as you turned to face Bucky on the seat next to you.

"Shit, I didn't expect you to accept." She said. "But go on, you can't back up now." Bucky stared at Nat but she shrugged.

"A-Are you okay with this?" You asked him. He stared at your eyes and nodded. You pushed a hand against Bucky's chest to rest his back against the couch and then moved it to his chin, slowly lifting it to access his neck. Your heart was beating hard against your ribcage and your palms were sweaty. Nat, Thor and Steve all leaned to look at you and Bucky. You closed your eyes and put your lips against his neck. Oh God, that's it, you were doing it. You parted your lips and sucked on his neck, at first softly but then a little harder.

"Hmm..." You heard him moan and God, that's the hottest thing you've ever witnessed in your life. After a few seconds you stopped sucking and backed up to look at the result.

"There's nothing, you gotta suck harder." Nat said, Thor jolted with laughter behind her. You rolled your eyes.

"Fine." You said before putting your lips on Bucky's neck again. This time you gently kissed his neck in hope to hear one of his moans again and you got rewarded when you sucked on a part of his skin. You sucked longer and then eased the hickey with your tongue. You felt Bucky shiver under you when you licked his skin. You backed up and this time it was there, a small purple circle on the side of his neck.

"Good job, [Y/N]!" Nat cheered as she raised her glass to clink it with yours.

"Sorry..." You muttered to Bucky who took his normal position back in the chair. He said nothing, he simply stared into your eyes. You didn't know what it meant.

"Alright, your turn." Nat said to you.

"Steve." You saw the poor boy's body freeze when you said his name. "I dare you to give Nat a lapdance."

"I thought you were my friend." He said to you with puppy eyes which made you giggle.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. Turn the music up!" Nat ordered to the AI. Steve got up and walked towards his friend.

"Holy crap, he's gonna do it." Bucky said next to you. Steve stood up in front of Nat who was sitting down and started dancing on her. You all started cheering for him as you laughed too. Soon enough he dropped next to her and they highfived each other.

"Steve, I gotta say I'm impressed." You said to him with a smile.

"Thank you." He said as he panted. "It's my turn though now I think, hm?" Nat nodded.

"Buck." He crossed eyes with his best friend. "I dare you to give [Y/N] a hickey too." He said with a smirk. Your body froze.

"I'll do it." Bucky accepted with challenge. "Doll?" He asked for your consent. You blushed and were embarrassed but nodded anyway. "Come." But where? He patted his lap.

"I'm not sitting on your knees, I'm too..-"

"Do you not trust my strength? Come I said."

"Are you ordering me?"

"Will it make you sit on my lap?" He asked with a smirk.

"We can leave you guys some intimacy if you want." Nat teased. God, you had forgotten they were here.

"Come." Bucky whispered to you. You got up and moved one leg between his but he put his hands around your waist and made you sit on him. You fell with a little gasp on his lap. "See? I'm good." You rolled your eyes and said nothing. He wrapped one arm around your thighs and the other rested on your waist. "Lift your head, doll." You took a deep breath and did as he said. Bucky smirked as he approached your collarbone. Instead of directly doing the hickey he started with leaving a trail of soft kisses from your collarbone to your neck. Then you felt him run his tongue there and it sent a chill down your spine. Soon enough he parted his lips and started sucking on your neck. You closed your eyes, focusing on what he was doing to you and how it made you feel. God, it felt amazing. He sucked harder and you couldn't help a moan escape your lips. You had rested your hand against his chest but you were now gripping his tank top as he sucked with more strength on your neck. You could swear you felt teeth too, he had bitten you and it had you squirming against him. Bucky chuckled against your neck at your reaction, he left one last wet kiss and then backed off of you. The three remaining Avengers leaned on you to check the winter soldier's work.

"That's bestial." Nat said. "She has teeth marks along with the hickey." You put your hand against your neck as you looked at Bucky.

"What can I say? I'm devoted." He crossed eyes with you. Steve was so embarrassed. This felt too intimate.

"He has marked you." Thor let out. You blushed as you were still staring at the winter soldier in disbelief. You realized you were still sitting on Bucky as his hand was uncousciously rubbing your clothed legs. You got up quickly and took back your seat next to him.

"It's my turn and I'm gonna dare Thor." Bucky announced.

"I'll do everything." The God challenged with a grin.

"I dare you to slip into Bruce's bed... naked." All your jaws dropped. There was a silence before Thor got up.

"Thor, don't-" Steve started.

"I will do it." Thor said as he started removing his clothes. When he was left in his boxers you couldn't help your eyes wandering accross the Asgardian's muscled body. You had unfortunately crossed eyes with Bucky and it made you choke on your glass.

"Everything good, doll?" He asked you with a smirk.

"P-Perfect." You stuttered. Thor walked out of the room to go to Bruce's bedroom and you all followed behind him.

"I can't believe he's gonna do this." Nat said. When you all had reached Bruce's door, Thor removed the last piece of his clothing and what had you gasp and turn around to hide your eyes is that he didn't even bother to hide himself.

"Thor!" Steve called out to him. "Could you at least cover your-"

"I have nothing to be ashamed of." Thor simply let out with a grin. Bucky was snickering next to you as he watched you cover your eyes.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. unlock Bruce's door." Surprisngly the AI obeyed to Nat's voice. You all looked at her but she just shrugged.

Thor entered Bruce's room while you all waited outside, the floor was silent for about fifteen seconds then you all heard an incredible roar and saw Thor's naked body flew out of the room. You all ran in the opposite direction, not wanting to get caught in the doctor's anger.

Nat and Bucky were literally crying with laughter while you and Steve were frowning with worry and regret, in your escape you didn't even bother to care about Thor.

"Alright, I think we're gonna call this a night." Steve said as you nodded.

"God, my sides hurt." Nat said.

"Well, goodnight you both, I'm gonna escort this lady back to her room." Bucky said to his best friend and Nat before gently grabbing your arm.

"Goodnight!" They waved at you and the winter soldier when the elevator doors closed.

  
  


"Oh my god, will Thor be okay?" You asked him

"You seem to worry a lot about him." Bucky said to you as he stared into your eyes.

"And that's bad because..?" You raised one eyebrow.

The elevator doors opened and you stepped out of it, Bucky following behind you.

"Do you love him?" He asked you suddenly, his tone leaving no room for jokes.

"Wh- What?" You asked confused.

"I've seen how you look at him, laugh with him and even get flustered around him."

"B-Bucky, wha-" You suddenly started blushing. Were you really acting like this with Thor? You had reached your bedroom door and you were about to slide your card in the card reader when the winter soldier reached for your waist and made you face him.

"Reply." He ordered you as he took a step towards you and trapped your body against your door. His flesh hand not leaving your waist while he put his metal fist above your head. You realized how tall he actually was and made you feel so small caged between his body and the door. You raised your head to look at him, your heart was racing and a blush had crept on your cheeks, the closeness of your bodies had your stomach do backflips.

"No!" You let out louder than you intended do. "W-What's going on with you?" He let go of your waist and took several steps back. The winter soldier seemed to realize he might've gone a little too far.

"Doll... I-I'm sorr-" He started.

"Goodnight, Bucky." You spat out before closing the door behind you.

 


	6. Night Terrors

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the way, I don't think I mentioned it in this work (but you know if you read my other works) english isn't my first language so I'm sorry if my writing seems sloppy to y'all, I try to google synonyms and new words so the reading can be enjoyable but none of you made comments about it yet and I'm thankful. Thanks to everyone who's enjoying this so far and keeps coming back for more <3

You woke up two hours later after going bed, startled by a sound of shattering glass. What had happened? You were exhausted. When you went to bed you overthought about what happened after the game. The way Bucky acted with you. You were worried he was mad at you for being friendly with Thor. Why would he be mad about this though? It drove you crazy the way the winter soldier was acting towards you sometimes. That man was a mystery and the fact that you couldn't solve was starting to make you stressed. You heard another loud thud. You sat on the edge of your bed. Was the tower being attacked? You rubbed your eyes awake as you walked towards your door. You put your ear against it, listening for any sound that could give you a hint about what was happening.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. where are those sounds coming from? Is the tower under attack?" You asked the AI.

"No, miss. They are coming from Bucky's room." Your eyes widened. What the fuck was he doing at 3am? You sighed deeply as you grabbed one of your jackets and put it on before stepping out of your room. You were only wearing a tank top and underwear for bed and there was no way you were going to knock clothed like that to his door. You zipped the jacket and pulled a bit on it until it covered your front. You were only going there for five seconds anyway.

You stepped out of your room, your floor was silent and the lights were turned off, no sound was coming out of Bucky's room anymore. Was he toying with you to piss you off? Well, damn it worked. You walked to his door with angry steps and knocked hard on it.

"Bucky, can you stop whatever you're doing? Some of us actually need sleep." You said. Only silence replied. "I heard you, open this door." You were about to go back to your room but then you heard another sound, something heavy fell on the floor. "F.R.I.D.A.Y. unlock Bucky's door please." You ordered the AI. You heard an unlocking sound so you turned the doorknob and opened the door. The room was plunged into darkness, only the moonlight was letting you see a bit in the room. "Bucky?" You called in a soft voice. You could grasp the shadow of his bed but it looked empty, the bathroom was in the dark too so he couldn't be there. Suddenly you heard a gasp on the other side of his bed, the part you couldn't see from where you stood. You walked around it and there you found the winter soldier.

Bucky was on the ground, his eyes were squeezed shut and his body was shivering and shaking, you honestly couldn't tell the difference. You reached for his flesh arm, his body was sweating but his skin was cold. Was he having an attack or something? You were on alert, you immediately kneeled next to him and started shaking his shoulder to wake him up. "Bucky! Bucky, please wake up!" You called out to him. His brows were furrowed, he looked in great pain and you had no idea what to do to wake him up from his nightmare. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. There was only one thing you could do. You brought your hand to his forehead and concentrated. You felt your powers flow through you, now all you had to do was hope he was gonna wake up soon.

Bucky's eyes flew open and the next thing you knew you were shoved hard on your back against the floor. As the winter soldier sensed a presence above him his defense reflexes kicked first and his metal hand wrapped around your neck pushing you down. Your fingers gripped his metal wrist to stop him before he choked you to death. You sobbed out his name in hope he'd recognize you, you knew with the darkness of the room he probably couldn't make out your facial features.

"B...uck..." This was bad, you could feel yourself getting weaker and your mind slowly fading away.

"[Y/N]?!" He quickly removed his hand from your neck and placed it under your head, raising your body so you could be in a sitting position. You brought your own hands to your neck and coughed hard, a few tears rolled down your cheeks. "I-I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." Bucky apologized to you. "Are you okay?!" He asked with fear in his voice. "Wait here." He got up and walked to the bathroom, he filled a glass of water and brought it to you. "Here, drink." Bucky brought the glass to your lips and you took a few sips of water before calming down. "Doll, I'm sorry." He repeated again.

"'s fine." You let out in a raspy voice and coughed again. Bucky suddenly wrapped his arms around you and hugged you tightly against him. His flesh hand caressed your hair while his metal one was pushing your back against him, not wanting to let go yet. "I'm gonna pass out if you don't let me breathe." You said to him. He released you with a small sad smile.

"What are you doing here?" He asked you with worry.

"I heard sounds coming from your room and they woke me up. I knocked on your door but you didn't answer so I got worried and came in, sorry." You explained yourself. "I-I think you were in a bad place... I found you laying on the floor, you were shaking and I was so scared..." Bucky took your free hand in his, your other one was still grasping the glass of water. "I tried using my powers on you and it might've worked since you woke up."

"I'm sorry I woke you up because of that, it happens to me sometimes. I'm gonna ask Tony to change rooms." Bucky said as he lowered his head.

"No!" You cut him sharply. "What happened? And are you okay?" You asked him, worried. "Changing rooms isn't gotta solve it, I want to help you!"

"I get nightmares since..." He took a deep breath. "Everything that happened." You nodded, he didn't need to explain it to you and go through these painful memories again, you had heard about what happened to him.

"I'm here for you." You simply said to him and squeezed his hand in yours. "C'mon, go back to bed. I'm gonna try to relieve some of your pain and I'll leave when you sleep." You got up with him. When he wanted to turn on the lamp on his nightstand he noticed it was gone. You kneeled and picked it up, finding it next to your feet. "I guess that's the sounds I heard. Damn, you must be wild in bed." You immediately regretted saying that out loud.

"And you haven't seen everything yet." He teased with a smirk.

"Shut up Bucky and get on that bed."

"You can just say so if you want me, doll." He chuckled as you rolled your eyes. He laid on his bed and he watched you stand next to him. "Well, come. Get comfortable at least if you're gonna use your power on me." You hesitated but finally climbed on his bed next to him with a blush. You sat next to him and he came closer to you. "Can I?" Bucky asked as he raised his head towards you.

"Can you what?" You asked, having no idea what he wanted.

"Put my head on your lap?" He asked. Your stomach did yet another backflip. "It's gonna be easier for you too, you won't have to twist your back to reach my head."

"You just have an answer for everything hm?" You said to him in a sarcastic tone.

"I know how to get my way." He smiled. You sighed deeply.

"Fine." His body approached yours, your heart raced as you rememberd you were in your panties and he was gonna lay his head on your naked thighs. The winter soldier rested his head on your lap, his soft hair was tickling you a bit and you couldn't help letting out what you wanted to be a **quiet** giggle.

"Why are you laughing?" He asked with closed eyes.

"Nothing, your hair's tickling me."

"You're ticklish?" He asked as he raised one of his eyebrows.

"I'm not sure that's an information that's gonna put me in advantage if I give it to you."

"You're right, it won't." He smiled as he moved his head a bit, earning more giggles from you. "I love when you laugh." Bucky suddenly let out.

"J-Just let me heal you, I-I'll be gone before you know it." You stuttered, embarrassed.

"Please, stay." He said to you as he got up and kneeled in the bed to face you. "I want you to be there when I wake up." You looked at his eyes.

"I-I'm not sure..."

"What are you afraid of?" He asked you. "You trust me, right?" You nodded shyly. "Then please stay."

"Okay." You said quietly. He smiled at you before approaching his face closer to yours and kissing your cheek. He laid back again on the bed and put his head on your naked thighs. You delicately put your fingers against his temples and closed your eyes. "You can relax, it's not gonna hurt you." You reassured him.

"I know it won't, I trust you." Bucky said as he closed his eyes, leaning into your touch.

  
  


\---

  
  


When the winter soldier woke up he felt rested, full of energy. He doesn't think he ever felt this good in a long long time after waking up. He rubbed his eyes open and turned his head to look next to him. What he saw warmed his heart. You were curled up next to his body, sleeping peacefully and you looked relaxed, free of all your worries and fears. This is what you deserved he thought. To always look this peaceful. He approached you and put a kiss against your forehead. Suddenly he got worried about finding your skin cold. He felt bad about being such a bad host. He didn't even give you a pillow or a blanket. You were curled up because you were cold. He got up and grabbed the unused blanket on the bed to cover you. His eyes couldn't help wander on your body. Jesus Christ, he hadn't noticed last night because of the darkness but you were in your underwear. Bucky blushed as he decided to take a cold shower to wake himself up.

  
  


You opened your eyes soon after, the sounds of water coming from the bathroom waking you up. You looked around you, remembering where you were and how you had appeard here. You heard the water stop and two minutes later Bucky came out of the bathroom. You were fully awake now. The winter soldier was only wearing a towel around his hips, his hair was wet and he had droplets of water running down his torso. A sight that immediately had your heart beat faster and your stomach doing backflips.

"Good morning, doll." He said to you with a smile on his face.

"H-Hey..." You replied back shyly, looking away from his muscled body. Damn, he really had nothing to envy to Thor. He looked even better in your own opinion. "A-Are you feeling better?" You asked, trying not make him notice you were trying to avoid looking at him.

"You did wonders on me doll, I never slept like last night."

"I'm glad." You kept avoiding his gaze.

"Why are you not looking towards me?" He asked with amusement.

"I-It depends, are you still naked?"

"Not yet but that can change." He chuckled.

"No! God, please." You begged. You heard him walk towards the bed. You were screwed. You closed your eyes as you sighed.

"Look at me." He asked.

"N-No..." You replied shyly.

"Why not?"

"Goddamn Bucky, you're naked. It's embarrassing." You let out, frustrated. Suddenly he grabbed your hand and put it against his abs which made you open your eyes and gasp loudly. You brought your hand back to you and jumped out of the bed. "Stop playing Bucky, what the hell do you want from me?!" You shouted. He was laughing at your reaction which honestly made you upset.

"Your nose is scrunched again, it's so cute." You threw a pillow at him before reaching for his doorknob. "Wait, doll, I'm sorry." Bucky said as he kept laughing.

"I hate you so much." He wrapped his arms around you. "Stop touching me, put on a shirt at least."

"Thought you loved my arms." Your face reddened.

"You're a pain in my ass." You told him. "Ouch! What the hell?" He had bitten your neck again. "Did you just bite me? You're actually crazy, you know that? Let me go, I'm gonna change in my room."

"Ah... doll please, never leave my life." Bucky asked you as he let out a pleasant hum and grinned.

"Damn, I think I actually damaged your head last night." He started laughing again. "Release me, I gotta go!" You asked him one more time.

"What's the nice word?"

"Are you serious?"

"Very."

"Is your goal to annoy me to death today?" You asked.

"You're just so adorable to mess with."

"W-What the..." You blushed. You paused before sighing deeply. "Fine. Please, let me go." Bucky released you and took a step back.

"I'll come get you in thirty minutes for breakfast." He said to you.

"Sure." You rolled your eyes as you finally stepped out of his room and closed the door behind you.

"Bucky Barnes, you're in too deep." He thought out loud.

  
  


\---

  
  


You took loud and angry steps towards the winter soldier as you pointed a finger towards him. He has been waiting for you in front of the elevator. "Bucky, what the fuck?"

"What's wrong, doll?" He asked, really confused this time.

"My neck!" You pointed towards it. You had a huge hickey on the side, a bite mark on the nape and worse of all, traces of strangulation. "If the others see this they're gonna assume the worst!"

"What's wrong with th- ow!" You had slapped him on the shoulder. "Okay. Why don't you just wear a scarf or something? And if somebody asks say you catched a cold." You put your palms against your face, trying so hard not to lose your cool. "C'mon doll, it's fine." He reassured you.

You went back into your room and grabbed a scarf that you wrapped around your neck before joining Bucky back to the elevator. "If they see my neck I'm out of this tower." You warned the winter soldier as the elevator doors closed.

  
  


"Good morning you both!" Steve greeted you with a bright smile as always.

"Hi Steve. Hey everyone." You waved back at the Avengers members in the kitchen. All of them were here except for Thor as always.

"Is that a new look?" Tony asked you as he pointed at the cloth around your neck.

"N-No... I-" Oh God, you were such a bad liar. "I-I'm just cold." You replied.

"Really?" Nat raised one of her eyebrows. "You don't have to hide Bucky's hickey, we were there."

"The what now?" Tony asked.

"It was a dare." Bucky replied. Tony crossed eyes with you but you quickly lowered your head in shame.

"Why do you have one too?" Bruce asked the winter soldier.

"Also a dare." You replied. Nat and Steve were quietly chuckling as you and Bucky took seats around the table.

"It can't be that bad, show me that [Y/N]." Tony said as he approached you.

"NO!" You accidentally shouted as you got up. Everyone looked at you except Bucky who was trying to suppress a smile next to you.

"Fine, fine." Tony gave up. "Anyway, I have to inform you. This afternoon you will go on a mission. Don't worry, nothing dangerous." He said as he noticed a glimmer of anxiety pass in your eyes. "It's just in case things go bad for the agents. They might need your healing."

"Okay." You accepted.

"Is any of us on that mission?" Bucky asked Tony.

"No, they don't need us. Maria will pick you up later." He said as he looked back at you.

"Yeah, don't worry Bucky. Your [Y/N] will be fine." Nat teased. A blush crept on your cheeks.

"Anyway, eat well [Y/N], you gotta gather some strength for your first mission." Steve said to you with a smile as he placed breakfast on the table. "Don't worry, it will be fine." He reassured you with a pat on your shoulder.

When everyone sat around you to eat Bucky discreetly put a hand on your knee under the table. You crossed eyes with him in silence. You appreciated the small gesture.

 


	7. Late night call

"Are you gonna be okay?" Bucky asked you with a worrisome look. The winter soldier was sitting on the edge of your bed, he had come after lunch to check on you. He watched you prepare your bag.

"Yeah, yeah. Everyone reassured me." You said with a little smile. "I just thought my first mission would be with you guys."

"If you want I can come with you. No one will stop me." You walked towards him and gently ruffled his hair.

"No, it's fine. Thank you though." He wrapped his arms around your waist and brought you closer to him. You heart beat faster as he rested his head against your stomach.

"Be careful. You can't heal yourself." He reminded you.

"I've been all my life."

"If it's too dangerous run away."

"That I did too." You said with a sad smile. Bucky released you and took your hands in his, raising his head to look at your face.

"I'm serious doll, the people the SHIELD deals with aren't nice guys. They're-"

"You're starting to stress me Bucky." You cut him. He sighed.

"I'm sorry doll, I just don't want to los-" He stopped himself. "I wish you'd let me come to protect you."

"It will be fine. Like Tony said it's not a dangerous mission, they know I have no fighting skills so I'm sure they won't put me in danger."

"They better not." Bucky said as he put a kiss inside one of your palms.

"I-I gotta go." You said as your face reddened. Bucky smiled and let you go. He got up and hugged you in his arms one last time.

"Give me your phone. Just in case." You unlocked your phone and gave it to him. "I put my number in there." He said as he gave it back to you. "We don't know what could happen. If you get separated from your team or get lost or anything- Call me."

"Bucky I'll be fine." You said with a small laugh. He opened the door of your room for you and decided to escort you to the parking where Maria was waiting for you.

  
  


"Hey, you must be [Y/N]. I'm Maria Hill." She offered you her hand that you took. You shaked it quickly.

"Y-Yes, it's me." You stammered. "Well." You said as you turned to face Bucky. "See you later I guess."

"Remember." He said as he pointed at your phone. You smiled at him as you got into the car and then waved him goodbye.

"You and the winter soldier are dating?" Maria asked you after she closed the car door and turned on the engine.

"W-What?! No!" You replied panicked.

"Ok... I was just asking."

"H-He's a... friend." You said as you put on your seatbelt and looked out the window.

"Uh huh." She raised one of her eyebrows, her eyes on the road.

"S-So what's the mission?" You asked in hope to change the subject.

"First mission huh? I understand you're nervous. Don't worry, you'll mostly stay in a van with armed agents. Their missions is to protect you while the other agents are gonna do a job a lil more messier, you don't wanna hear about it." She explained.

"Okay."

"So, you can heal people huh? Must be useful."

"Yeah I guess." You said. You were lost in your thoughts, the moment you left the tower with Maria you only had Bucky in mind. You couldn't wait to go back home.

  
  


\---

  
  


"I got a call from Fury, [Y/N] might not be back tonight. Their guy escaped, they're searching for him at the moment but they need to keep her around in case things go wrong." Tony announced to the Avengers in the dining room.

"Alright, I'm going. I knew I should've gone with her." Bucky said as he got up.

"Calm down, she's fine." Nat said to him.

"Yeah, relax Buck. It wasn't a huge mission and they know [Y/N] can't fight. It's not like they sent her alone searching for that guy." Steve put a hand on his best friend's shoulder. Bucky passed his flesh hand on his face. He was very worried.

"Everytime I leave her alone something happens." The winter soldier sighed as he sat back on his chair.

"Why are you worrying? She will be back tomorrow and everything will go back to normal." Thor reassured Bucky.

"Buck, can you come with me for a second?" Steve asked him. They both proceeded to walk out of the room. Bruce crossed eyes with Nat but she just shrugged.

"Alright, do you want to tell me what's going on with [Y/N]?" Steve asked his best friend as he leaned against the balcony door. Bucky took a few steps forward and stared in front of him, the city lights laying across him and shining brightly in the darkness of the night relaxed him.

"She's probably scared. She worries a lot, I can't leave her alone." The winter soldier told Steve.

"And?"

"And what?" Bucky asked, his brows furrowing.

"C'mon, there's more, right?"

"What do you want me to tell you Steve? There might be, okay?" Bucky said as he turned around to look at the captain's face. "But it's not- I don't think she's ready. Everytime I think we're gonna take the next step she runs away. Honestly I think she's scared of who I really am."

"And who's the real you?" Steve asked.

"The winter soldier. A murderer." He let out with a sad expression.

"First of all that wasn't you and she has never seen that side of you. And second she literally only smiles when you're around. You're right. I think she's not ready but it's not because of you." Steve said as he took a few steps towards Bucky. "I think it's because of her own personal problems and I actually believe she's getting better since you both are getting closer."

"I don't know..."

"Hey, everyone in this tower noticed your games with her but trust me, we saw hers as well. I don't think you leave her indifferent. I'm your friend Buck and honestly I think you both help each other. I think [Y/N] just needs a lil boost of confidence in herself and then she'll let go."

"You gotta help me Steve, I'm going crazy." Bucky confessed to his best friend who smiled at him.

"Don't worry, me and Nat are on it already. Did you really think the truth or dare game was improvised last night? And the hickeys, they're Nat's idea too." Steve revealed.

"You both could've put me in the confidence." Bucky told him as he shaked his head.

"So, you really like her?" Steve asked seriously this time.

"Yeah. I think I do." Bucky replied. "She's been gone for- what, eight hours now? And I couldn't get her out of my mind once."

"I hope this works out for you Buck." Steve said as he put a hand on his best friend's shoulder. "You both deserve to be happy."

"Thanks." Bucky replied as he smiled at the captain.

  
  


\---

  
  


After his talk with Steve, Bucky bid goodnight to the team and retreated to his bedroom. The super soldier laid on his bed and closed his eyes, your face never leaving his mind. It tortured him how hard he wanted to talk to you, touch you, hear you laugh or even see you be annoyed at him. He was getting obsessed with your reactions. He never missed the way your cheeks reddened when he acted a little too bold with you, the way your lips curved into a smile when he said something funny or, his favorite, the way your nose scrunched up when you were upset. You were so adorable he wanted to hold you close against him and never let you go.

"C'mon Bucky, get a hold of yourself." He thought out loud. "Oh, fuck it." Bucky grabbed his phone that rested on his nightstand and decided to send you a message. He needed to hear from you.

" _Can I call you?_ "

It was late and despite wanting to immediately call you and hear your voice he knew you might be sleeping, you needed rest during a mission so he respected that.

Two minutes later he heard a notification sound coming from his phone.

" _Yes._ "

Bucky smiled as he put his phone against his ear after clicking call. God, he felt like a teenager boy asking his crush out for the first time.

"Hey, Buck." You greeted him with a soft voice that made his stomach do a backflip.

"Did I wake you up?" He worried immediately. It would've been the second time.

"No, don't worry." You giggled. "I just got into bed and..." You paused. "I was thinking about you." Bucky blushed.

"Really?" He smiled. "Why didn't **you** call?" He teased.

"D-Didn't dare to..." You bit onto your lower lip. "It made me very happy when I saw your message."

"I miss you, doll." He confessed. "Tony told us about your mission and they're all forcing me to stay here instead of joining you." You let out another little giggle.

"You should listen to them."

"Tell me, are you okay?"

"Yes, I am. Don't worry about me." You reassured him.

"How can I not? Everytime I take my eyes off you something happens."

"Is that an indirect way of saying you're my good luck charm or something?"

"Maybe I am." He chuckled and then paused. "I can't wait to see you, doll."

"M-Me too..." You confessed. "It's all I've been thinking about since I got into the car with Maria."

"Only the truth?" He asked.

"Only the truth." You confirmed. God, he was thankful he was alone in his room at the moment because he was grinning like an idiot. "By the way, how are the others?" You asked.

"Good but if you miss them you can just call them. You're with me right now." He reminded you. You smiled.

"Are you jealous or something?" You teased.

"I didn't call to talk about them, focus on me doll." He licked his lips. You let out another small giggle.

"Alright, let's talk about you. What did you do today after I left?"

"You mean after you left a gaping hole in my heart?" You laughed a little louder this time.

"Bucky..."

"It's true, doll. I tried to take my mind off things so I went to the training room. Stayed in there for quite some time until Steve picked me up. He said he could hear me punch into the sandbag from all the way up to his room."

"You're incorrigible." You said to him.

"Then I spent another good amount of time thinking about you, wondering and worrying if you were safe. When Tony told us about the delay I couldn't believe it. It felt like my world was crashing down."

"You're exaggerating." You sighed.

"Only the truth, doll." There was a pause where you said nothing. Then Bucky heard a sniffle on your side. "Doll are you okay? Did something happen?"

"S-Shut up, why are you telling me this?" You squeaked.

"Are you crying?"

"N-No..."

"Yes, you are. Please don't, it hurts me that I can't wipe your tears away."

"It's because of you that I-I'm crying. Are you p-playing with me?" You asked.

"Never, doll. I mean, sometimes I do but not right now." Bucky said serious. He heard another quiet sob. "I feel bad about calling you and making you cry now."

"You're the worst." You heard him let out a genuine laugh.

"Before you came into this tower I was suffocating and then you stepped into my life and it feels like you put oxygen into my lungs, the air has never been fresher." He confessed.

"Stop talking I'm begging." Your heart beat so hard against your ribcage you thought it was gonna pop out of your chest. You were crying at his declaration because no one had ever said something so sweet to you but you were also lost. You had no idea if he meant those things. How could he? You were just you and to you it wasn't enough. How could he _L word_ someone like you? It just couldn't be real.

"You should go to sleep now." Bucky said to you. "I'm sure we'll see each other soon."

"I hope so." You smiled. "Goodnight Bucky." You said in a soft voice.

"Sweet dreams, doll." And then you both hung up, put your phones away and closed your eyes in hopes tomorrow would come fast.

 


	8. Reunited

Four days.

That's how long you've been gone.

Bucky was going crazy, especially lately. He was constantly in a sour mood and didn't want to participate in any activities the others organized. He's asked Tony and Fury countless times to join in on the mission and he was rejected each time. Your phone had unfortunately ran out of battery too since you didn't bring your charger with you, this mission was only supposed to last around four hours not _days_ so that meant no more talks with Bucky at night. Steve tried to cheer his best friend up alas the winter soldier couldn't be satisfied. He just wanted to see you and make sure you were okay. Bucky deeply missed you presence in the tower.

"If these SHIELD agents are so incompetent they can't catch one man I don't even want to think about how they can protect [Y/N]." Bucky complained again. The others were used to it now.

"Hey, at least we know she's still fine." Bruce tried to reassure him.

"Yeah, if something had happened Fury would've informed Tony and Tony inform us." Nat continued.

"If I had just known where they went..." Bucky muttered to himself as he held his head between his hands.

"Buck, stop torturing yourself." Steve worried about his best friend. "And go take a nap or something. You look terrible." Bucky raised his head to look at Steve who just raised an eyebrow at him. "You honestly don't want [Y/N] to see you like this." The winter soldier sighed and got up to go back to his room. There was no need to loaf around like this in the tower.

Bucky decided to take a warm shower to try to relax a little bit, it's true he looked terrible. His hair was disheveled, he had bags under his eyes and he didn't shave his beard since you disappeard. After he cleaned himself he laid on his bed and immediately closed his eyes. He wanted to fall asleep quickly to not think about you. If he did he knew he was going to overthink and make himself sad again. Hopefully when he'd wake up you would be there to welcome him.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Hey, good news everybody!" Tony announced. "[Y/N]'s mission is over and she can come back here."

"Oof." They all sighed with relief.

"She should be here in around three hours I think. Where's Bucky?" Tony asked.

"Finally catching some Z's." Steve replied. "Let him, honestly. I'll warn him later."

"Should we organize something?" Bruce asked.

"Yes, let's have a feast!" Thor cheered.

"That's not a bad idea." Nat shrugged. "She'll feel welcomed and can tell us how the mission went." Steve got up and rolled up his sleeves.

"I got work to do." He said.

"You know I can just have food delivered here, right?" Tony told him.

"You wanna order takeouts for [Y/N]'s arrival? Not on my watch. Well, if any of you is looking for me, I'll be in the kitchen." Steve walked out of the room.

  
  


Bucky walked into the kitchen two hours later, waking up rested from his nap, he looked better than earlier. His eyes widened as he looked around the kitchen. It looked like a bomb had exploded in there.

"Steve, what the hell happened here?"

"Oh Bucky, you're up." The captain turned around to check who was speaking to him. "Guess what? [Y/N]'s mission is over, she's coming home in around uh... one hour!" Steve said after he checked the clock. Bucky's jaw dropped. At long fucking last.

"And you, what are you doing?" He asked his best friend.

"Dinner, obviously. I don't know what she ate over there and if she had the same thing that we usually get when we go on missions then she's gonna be thrilled to find a warm meal on the table when she comes home." Bucky chuckled before erasing the smile off his face.

"Oh fuck, I gotta change before she arrives, I look like shit."

"Are you nervous?" Steve asked with a smirk as he kept cooking.

"Shut up, Steve." Bucky threw at him before getting out of the kitchen. He ran to his room with a grin on his face. Time had stopped in the tower since you left him alone in it. The winter soldier couldn't wait to speak with you again, laugh with you, touch you if you let him, he desperately needed you.

  
  


One hour later Bucky found Steve in the kitchen again, still cooking energetically by himself. The winter soldier hoped you were going to accept to eat with the Avengers otherwise you'd be breaking his best friend's heart.

"What smells so good in here?" Nat asked as she walked into the kitchen.

"Must be the pie in the oven. It should be almost ready." Steve said. Nat glanced towards the oven before dragging her eyes to Bucky.

"I see you took note of what [Y/N] said during the game huh?" She teased. Bucky was leaning on the wall next to Steve and what immediately jumped to Nat's eyes was his outfit. He wore a tight white shirt that made his torso muscles look alluring. His crossed arms made the veins on his biceps pop out, [Y/N] was not ready the Russian woman thought to herself.

"I'm gonna wait for her in the parking lot." Bucky said as he walked out of the kitchen, ignoring Nat's silly game.

"He's so in love with her." Nat said to Steve. The captain's lips curved into a smile but he couldn't reveal Bucky's secret. It wasn't his role to do so. "You know something, don't you?" She asked.

"Can you help me put on the table please? I'm very busy here." He said to her.

"Uh huh. Whatever you're hiding from me... I'll eventually figure it out Steve."

  
  


\---

  
  


The winter soldier raised his head when he heard the parking lot door open. He had been sitting on the stairs waiting for your arrival for around thirty minutes. He would've stayed here all night if he had to. The wait had been unsustainable and when he finally saw a dark van coming in he held his breath. The door opened and he finally saw you.

You waved goodbye to the SHIELD agent who drove you here and closed the van door behind you. When you turned around air got knocked out of your lungs. You didn't expect to find Bucky waiting for you. When you crossed eyes you both started running towards each other with grins on your faces. The winter soldier opened his arms for you and when you were finally face to face you wrapped your own arms around him as he closed his on your body. You don't know how but he succeeded to lift you off the ground and do a little twirl on himself. You giggled against him, you were happy to see him. Bucky put you back on the ground and then put his palms against the sides of your face.

"Doll..." He breathed out the tender nickname with a smile. The winter soldier closed his eyes before putting a soft kiss against your forehead. "I can't believe you're finally here."

"I-I missed you so much." You confessed, overwhelmed with joy.

"Are you okay? Why did it take so long? Did anybody touch you?" He suddenly asked with anxiety as he started checking you out, looking for any bruise or whatever.

"One question at a time, Bucky." You said with a giggle. "I'm fine, don't worry. But how about you?"

"Never been better now that I'm holding you." He said as he held you tight against him once more. "Come, I bet you're exhausted." Bucky released you and took your hand in his, well decided to never let you go again.

"Not gonna lie, I'd kill for a warm shower." You said as you walked to the elevator.

"Go rest in your room, I'll warn the others you arrived. I'll come get you later for dinner." You smiled at him.

"Thank you, Bucky." He turned his head towards you, Bucky stared at you with gentle eyes before bringing your hand to his lips and putting a kiss on the back of it.

"Go, now." He ordered as the elevator stopped on your floor. He let go of your hand and before you walked away you approached him and kissed his cheek leading to a light blush appearing on his cheeks. When the elevator doors closed on him he let out a long sigh before inhaling deeply. It's as if he was holding his breath the whole time since he saw you in the parking lot.

  
  


Bucky stepped inside the kitchen with a huge smile on his face, lost in his thoughts.

"I thought you were waiting for [Y/N]?" Steve asked in confusion.

"She's here." Bucky replied.

"Wh- Where is she?" The captain asked as he threw a glance behind Bucky, expecting to find you behind him.

"She's in her room, I said I'll get her later for dinner. She wanted to clean up."

"Oh yeah, okay, sure." Steve said as he stared a little longer at Bucky's face. "Are you okay? You seem... not here?"

"What are you talking about Stevie, I'm right here." Bucky said with a light chuckle.

"You've really fallen deep huh?" Steve said to him with a small smirk.

"You have no idea." Bucky confessed.

  
  


\---

  
  


"[Y/N], I'm so glad to see you!" Steve said as he wrapped you in his arms.

"Me too, Steve." He gently released you and then Nat came.

"Please don't ever leave us this long with this guy." She said as she pointed towards Bucky who was behind you before hugging you too. "We couldn't hear ourselves think with all his whining." She teased.

"Very funny, Natasha." Bucky said as he rolled his eyes.

"How are you doing sweetheart?" Tony threw a friendly wink at you as he smiled.

"Good. I'm fine." You said timidly, still not used to be in the center of the attention. Thor and Bruce greeted you too before Steve hurried everyone to the dining room.

"He's been cooking all day for you." Nat said to you. You glanced at Bucky and he confirmed.

"Oh my god, he didn't have to." You said as you started to feel bad.

"Don't worry, he likes doing it. And we all agreed it was a good idea." Nat continued. Steve came back with all the dishes and put them on the table as you all took your seats. You sat between Nat and Bucky.

"[Y/N], I hope you're hungry because there's no way you're leaving this table if you don't help yourself to everything here." Steve warned as he sat across you.

"I'm starving." You let out with a grin. Bucky glanced at you discreetly with a smile on his face.

"I bet they fed you with those disgusting bland crackers that taste like... sand." Thor said to you.

"Oh my god, how did you know?" You asked him.

"I get them each time. Blergh." He made a disgusted face that made you giggle.

"I had that for four days. I'm so happy to finally get a warm dinner."

"I can't believe they didn't even feed you well despite keeping you there for so long." Bucky said to you. "You're never doing missions with these guys ever again." The winter soldier put his flesh arm around your shoulders. Nat rolled her eyes next to you.

"By the way Nat told me you cooked, Steve. Thank you so much." You smiled at him.

"You're absolutely welcome. If you wanna thank me, the best way is to finish your plate." The captain smiled at you.

"Oh you can count on that."

During dinner you told them about your mission, there was not much to say since you stayed in a van most of the time with the medic team waiting but in the end the mission was a success and no agent got wounded so you weren't even needed. By the end of dinner you were leaning on Bucky, your back against his torso and he had his arms wrapped around your waist and stomach. You didn't even realize how close you both got. He rested his chin on your shoulder and you stayed like this for a little moment while you were listening to the others speak about various things. Suddenly Bucky put a kiss against your neck and you gasped in surprise. The others turned their heads towards you both alerted by the sound coming out of your mouth. You blushed as you lowered your head down. You tried to sit straight on your seat but Bucky had a death grip on your body and didn't let you move.

"You both are so adorable." Nat teased you. You bit onto your lower lip, feeling so ashamed. You tried moving again and you heard the winter soldier chuckle lightly next to your year.

"Buck!" You squeaked. As an answer he just put a kiss against your cheek this time. You hid your face in your palms, too embarrassed to look at him or the others in the room.

"Doll, I missed you so much." He laughed against your hair as he hid his face on your nape.

"I'm starting to realize maybe I didn't as much." You replied with annoyance. "Ow! Hey!" You yelped after Bucky pinched your side.

"Look at him, he got back his [Y/N] and now he's the happiest." Bruce said next to Tony who nodded.

"Alright kids, I think it's time we call it a day." Steve said as he got up.

"Bucky, let me go." You said quietly.

"Never." You rolled your eyes.

"I wish you all goodnight." Thor waved before leaving, Bruce and Tony following after him.

"Don't stay up too late you two." Nat smiled as she dragged Steve outside with her.

"Bucky, please." You turned your head towards his face. You blushed as you realized it was just inches away from yours. You were the only two members remaining in the room.

"Please what?" He asked with a provocative smile that annoyed the shit out of you but also made your heart beat faster.

"I want to sleep, I'm exhausted." You said with a tired face.

"Fine." Bucky said as he released you. You both got up from your seats and as soon as your feet hit the floor the winter soldier picked you up bridal style in his arms.

"Wh- Aah! Bucky, put me down!" You shouted as your arms automatically wrapped around his neck. You clinged to him like if he was a lifesaver and you were about to drown.

"No. You said so yourself, you're exhausted."

"Stop, please, I'm too-"

"You need to stop underestimating my strength, doll. I'm holding you and not letting you go." He said with a smirk. "C'mon, let's go to our floor." You sighed deeply as you closed your eyes. Bucky carried you all the way to the elevator and until he reached his door. "Can you turn the doorknob, my hands are kinda occupied."

"Bucky, that's not my door."

"I know."

"What game are you playing again?" You said as you reached his doorknob. The quicker you'd do as he say the quicker he'd put you down. After walking into the room he finally put you back on your feet.

"Please stay with me." He requested you.

"W-What?" You asked confused.

"It's been too long since I saw you. I want to talk with you more." God, he made those puppy eyes that made your heart melt and you couldn't say no to.

"Okay, fine." You accepted. You saw a bright smile appear on his face and you couldn't help smiling too. "Can I change at least? I'm gonna go back to my room."

"If you're not back here in five minutes I'll come get you, doll."

"You're actually terrible, did you know that?" You said as you stepped out.

As promised you came back five minutes later changed into your pajamas that consisted of booty shorts, a tank top and your jacket. You also brought your pillow and blanket with you this time.

"Well, doll, if you wanted to move in you could've just said so." He teased you as he saw you coming with your stuff over his bed.

"Alright, I'm leaving." You said as you proceeded to step out again but Bucky was quicker and wrapped his arms around your waist, making you fall on the bed on top of him.

"You're not going anywhere." Bucky said as he looked into your eyes. Your face reddened, you fastly moved away to change positions. "I see you've put on pajama bottoms _this time_." He teased, hinting at the time you came into his room in underwear.

"I hate you so much, I don't know what I'm still doing here." Bucky chuckled.

"I'm joking, doll." He laughed as he laid on the bed next to you. "And those panties suited you perfectly."

"Y-You stared??" Bucky turned his head towards your red face and nodded as he bit onto his lower lip. You were speechless, you didn't know what to say or do, you were terribly embarrassed.

"You're beautiful, doll."

"Oh, shut up." You sat on the bed and crossed your arms on your chest

"Such a mouth on her." He said with a grin. "And it's just fair. You look at me and I look at you."

"What are you talking about, I never looked at your- you know..." You said as you blushed.

"Have you ever seen one?"

"Buck!" You gasped. "I can't believe you just asked me something like that." He was laughing next to you.

"Hey, remember when you touched my torso the other time-"

"You mean when **you** made me touch." You corrected. "And before you ask, no it wasn't the first time I touched a stomach. Remember I need to touch people to heal them?"

"So you've healed a-"

"Please, tell me you were not going to ask this question..." You closed your eyes as you sighed. "And n-no, I-I never touched one..." You facepalmed. "I hate how you always trick me into just- giving into these conversations with you."

"That happens when you're comfortable around someone." He smiled at you. You blushed, God, you needed to change subjects.

"Do you still have your nightmares by the way?"

"I barely slept while you were gone. No sleep equal no dreams or nightmares." He said as he turned around to lay on his stomach so he could look at you.

"That's not a solution, Bucky." You gently put a hand against his cheek. He leaned into your touch and kissed your palm as he locked eyes with you which made your heart miss a beat.

"How could I sleep while you were away? What if you needed me?"

"I don't deserve you." You let out with a sad smile.

"Don't say that. You have never done anything wrong unlike me." Bucky said.

"It wasn't you." You reassured him. "The real Bucky is the one I have right here." You guided your hand from his cheek to his metal shoulder. The winter soldier felt a warmth in his chest when you touched the metallic part of him.

"You're an angel, doll. It's sad the people you encountered in your life never saw past your appearance. You're beautiful both in and out. You're glowing." Bucky sat next to you and took one of your hands in his.

"Thank you... for saying that." You smiled fondly at him. Bucky turned his head towards you and put his flesh hand against your cheek. He stared into your eyes but couldn't help glancing at your mouth.

He approached his face closer and closed his eyes before brushing his lips softly against yours. A chill ran down your spine and you felt butterflies fluttering inside your stomach, you closed your eyes and leaned into the kiss. His lips were full and warm, his kiss was the softest thing you ever felt.

Bucky gently broke the kiss and rested his forehead against yours as he smiled.

"You're the best thing that's happened to me, doll." He nuzzled your nose with his. In response you wrapped your arms around his neck and hugged him tightly against you. You have never felt this good before. "Doll?"

"Hm?" You replied as you hid your face in the crook of his neck.

"Look at me." Bucky told you with a smile.

"Nuh uh." You shaked your head as you hugged him tighter. You felt so embarrassed. He gently ran his hands on your sides and tickled you. You burst out laughing and let go of his neck to remove his hands away from you. "Cheater!"

Bucky held your face between his hands and put another kiss on your lips that knocked air out of your lungs. Your face was as red as a beet as you stared at him in disbelief. "C'mon, it's time to sleep doll." You bit onto your lower lip as you took a laying position on the bed. Bucky laid next to you and pulled the blanket on your body. He grabbed your hand and gave it a kiss before squeezing it a bit. "Goodnight, doll." Bucky smiled at you and never let go of your hand

 


	9. Pillow Talk

"Hmm..." You moaned in your sleep. Bucky had woken up before you and he was currently leaving a trail of soft kisses on your skin while you were still in Morpheus' arms. "Bucky..." You muttered in a soft voice.

"I'm here, doll." The winter soldier smiled against your skin before wrapping his arm around your stomach and sticking his body to yours. He put his face in the crook of your neck and sucked on your skin there to leave a mark. His first hickeys and bite marks had disappeard while you were away so he had to put new ones to let everyone know you were his.

"Wh- Oww..." You had opened your eyes, confused and not remembering where you were. The little stingy feeling in your neck had awoken you. You also felt a warmth around your body coming from Bucky next to you. "Bucky? What are you doing?" You asked in a sleepy tone.

"Good morning, doll." He greeted you as he removed his head from your neck and moved to put a kiss on your cheek.

"Good morning..." You said back as you rubbed your eyes awake. You proceeded to sit on the bed. Bucky looked at you, your hair was disheveled and your eyes were puffy, you looked so adorable he could eat you.

"Come back here." He ordered you with a smile. You were too tired to argue so you laid back next to him. Bucky looked at you as if he didn't expect you to comply so easily. "Come in my arms, I want to feel you against me." You started blushing as you suddenly realized what he was saying to you. The winter soldier spread his arms and despite feeling a bit reluctant you came closer to him.

"Wait a minute..." You face reddened. "Since when were you shirtless Bucky..?"

"Last night." He chuckled.

"I-I'm pretty sure you had a shirt on."

"I felt too constricted in it so I took it off after you slept." He lowered his head to look at you. "Aren't you happy? I thought you loved my arms." Bucky teased. He hugged you tighter until you had to push your palms against his naked chest to be able to breathe.

"You're so cocky." You let out which made him laugh.

"So tell me, doll..."

"Hm? What do you want to know?"

"How was your first kiss?"

"B-Buck!" You blurted out in embarrassment. "G-God, don't you got no shame or anything..."

"Why would I feel ashamed about what we did? I liked it." Damn, Bucky really wore his heart on his sleeve with you.

"I-It... was good." You let out as a blush crept on your cheek. His brows furrowed.

"Just good?" He repeated. You rolled your eyes.

"I need to leave." You said as you proceeded to remove the blanket off you.

"You're not going anywhere." He said as he locked his arms around your waist.

"Well, I can't really compare can I?" You sighed. "Actually you're the one who can but I'm not interested in the answer. It was probably your worst kiss since I'm inexperienced." You said as you avoided his gaze.

"It wasn't that bad." He shrugged before glancing at you and giving you a wink.

"You're the worst and I hate you." You tried to get off the bed as he laughed.

"Doll, I'm joking." Bucky couldn't stop laughing, he seized your wrist and brought you back next to him. "It was perfect, I loved it." He confessed as he stared into your eyes. "All I've been thinking about since yesterday is when am I gonna get to kiss you again." Your heart missed a beat.

"W-We'll see that later. For now I need to take a shower."

"Take one with me."

"Buck!" You grabbed your pillow and hit him lightly with it.

"What? I can rub your back, you can rub mine-"

"Are you out of your mind?" You interrupted him as you threw your legs to the side of the bed to sit on the edge. "I-I'll see you later." You said as you got up.

"You're not even gonna kiss me goodbye?" Bucky teased with a smirk. You sighed loudly as you rolled your eyes and grabbed his doorknob, getting out and ignoring him.

  
  


\---

  
  


You and Bucky walked into the kitchen to have breakfast, the other members of the Avengers were already there.

"Hey." Nat started. "How come you both always come in here together every now and then?" She asked with a suspicious look.

"You know..." Bucky started as he noticed you looked uncomfortable. "We're on the same floor, take the elevator at the same time..."

"Uh huh..." She dragged her stare from Bucky to you, trying to analyze your expressions.

"Good morning, [Y/N]." Tony greeted you with a smile. "I knocked on your door this morning but you didn't answer." Your face immediately reddened.

"O-Oh... S-Sorry, I-I must've been sleeping d-deeply and didn't hear you..." You replied nervously, Bucky held back a chuckle next to you which earned him you elbowing him discreetly in the side. "D-Did you need something?" You asked quickly in hope to change the subject.

"Forget it, it can't wait." He simply waved with his hand. You nodded.

"[Y/N], Bucky... I made your favorites: crepes!" Steve announced as he put the pile of crepes on the table. You and the winter soldier's jaws dropped.

"Steve, I owe you my life." You said to him. The captain let out a genuine laugh. Bucky pulled out two chairs for you and him to sit.

"I think this might be my favorite morning in a long time." Bucky said out loud.

"C'mon, I have made crepes in the past." Steve said with a smile.

"Yeah, I was also talking about waking up next to-" His eyes widened as he realized his mistake. You had brought your palms against your face. Bucky and that goddamn big mouth of his.

"What were you about to say?" Nat asked with piercing eyes.

"Nothing-" He started.

"You weren't in your room this morning, right?" She said as she crossed eyes with you. Tony was balancing his stare from you to Bucky with an open mouth, he was shocked.

"I-I swear it's not what you all are thinking right now!" You panicked.

"Good morning everyone." Thor interrupted as he walked into the kitchen. "Crepes!" He shouted with joy as he eyed the table.

"You slept in his room?!" Tony finally let out. Everyone completely ignored Thor.

"Tony, I'm sure there's a reasonable explanation." Steve tried to calm things down.

"I-I mean... Do they really owe us one though?" Bruce added.

"Oh, they absolutely do." Nat said as she didn't stop staring at you both.

"Why is no one talking about Thor being awake so early?" Bucky tried changing subjects.

"Oh no no, we're talking about you and [Y/N] here." Tony reminded him.

"Stop, we didn't do anything!" You defended yourself. "It has been a long time since we saw each other so after everyone went to bed we just had a conversation in his room."

"Yeah it was pillow talk." Bucky continued.

"Buck!" You shouted as you turned your head to face him. You heard Nat and Steve hold back a chuckle. "That's absolutely not what that was!"

"But he said he woke up next to you." Tony didn't let go.

"God. I was tired and I accidentally fell asleep while we talked. That's it." That wasn't completely false but not completely true either. Bucky's lips curved into a smirk.

"Why are you grinning?" Nat asked him. You immediately glared at Bucky and he stopped smiling.

"What are you guys talking about?" Thor said as he took a chair and sat on it.

"Is that a hickey I see on your neck?" Tony asked as he was staring at you. You directly put your hand on the purple mark to hide it.

"N-No?" You lied.

"Oh my God and it's a different one from the game." Nat noticed. "So it was either Bucky or an agent of the SHIELD."

"You just had to let that slip huh?" You said as you faced Bucky again. "Because there's no way you're not doing it on purpose now." You held your head between your hands and closed your eyes to calm down. God, you felt like you were on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

"Doll, are you o-" You raised your hand to silence him.

"Don't." It was getting harder to breathe. "I-I'm gonna faint." You warned. After all you were still on an empty stomach and the stress of the situation made you dizzy. Your vision blurred but it was not because of tears this time. You felt yourself slipping off your chair and suddenly everything was black. You thought you heard a voice calling you but you couldn't make it out. You were gone.

  
  


\---

  
  


You blinked several times before finally opening your eyes. You looked around you and you recognized the walls of your room. What had happened?

"Doll, you're awake!" Bucky said with relief. He was sitting on the bed next to your laying body. He brought his flesh hand to your forehead as his metal one was holding one of yours. "I-I'm sorry about earlier. Are you mad at me?" Ah, yeah. You rememberd now.

"Of course not." You said in a quiet voice. You noticed his lips curved into a small smile as a glimmer of sadness went through his eyes. "What happened? How long has it been?"

"A few hours. I think you needed rest. You fainted." He explained to you. Bucky lowered his head before speaking again. "It's my fault, doll. I'm very sorry. I was selfish asking you to stay up with me when you had returned from a long mission. I didn't think about you."

"Bucky, it's fine."

"No, it's not. You were right, I never learn when to stop." You gently squeezed his metal hand and he raised his head to look you in the eyes.

"Stop torturing yourself about this. I'm not mad at you."

"You should be."

"I don't want to be mad at the only person who does everything to make me happy." You smiled at him. Bucky leaned over you and put a kiss against your forehead. "Where are the others?" You asked when he sat back next to you.

"Out. Something about Thor's brother? I don't care. I told them I'd watch over you." Oh, yeah. You rememberd Thor was there during breakfast this morning. "You should rest, doll." He said to you as he noticed you were lost in your thought.

"Don't wanna argue with that." You said with a smile. "Will you stay with me?"

"I'm not going anywhere." He gently brought your hand to his lips and kissed it. You slowly moved a bit to make some space on the bed.

"Lay with me." You asked him.

"Are you sure?" Bucky asked you as he raised his eyebrows.

"Hmm." You nodded. "Hold me in your arms please." You requested in a soft voice that melted his heart.

"You finally admit you can't resist me." He smirked.

"Shh, don't ruin the moment." You giggled.

"Turn on your side, I'm gonna big spoon you." He said to you. You did as he said with a little blush on your cheeks. Bucky wrapped his arms on your waist and brought your back against his torso. "Better?"

"Hmm." You nodded again as you closed your eyes. He started kissing the back of your neck softly, earning a few other giggles from you. "It tickles." You said.

"You're so adorable I want to eat you." He whispered to your ear. Your stomach did a backflip. The winter soldier's hand was rubbing your stomach as he nibbled on your neck. You let out an accidental moan escape your lips when Bucky licked the side of your neck. "Doll, you drive me crazy..." He whispered again. You brought your hands to your face to cover your mouth as you blushed hard.

"B-Bucky...Ah!" The super soldier sucked on your skin harshly. Suddenly he gripped your waist with his hands and turned you around so you'd be laying on your back. Bucky towered over you and placed his two hands on the bed next to your head. You felt so small under him as he stared into your eyes.

"I want to kiss you, doll. Can I?" His eyes never left yours as he spoke to you. You felt so hot, temperature wise of course, your heart was about to burst out of your chest. You licked your lips out of stress as you stared back at him before nodding slowly. Bucky smiled and then leaned on your face. He closed his eyes and before you closed yours his lips crashed on yours. He kissed you a little more harshly than last night, your teeth collided and you felt his tongue run against your lower lip asking for permission to enter. You lips parted and then your tongue met his inside your mouth where they danced sensually. This felt amazing, you had never been through something like this before. It's like your whole body was on alert but not the bad kind. You got goosebumps as Bucky kissed you and you felt butterflies fluttering in your stomach. The winter soldier brought a hand against your cheek and gently caressed it as he kissed you deeply.

You hands were resting against your stomach because you had no idea what to do with them until you decided to wrap them around Bucky's neck, bringing him against your body. Bucky moved his legs between yours and laid on top of you, careful not to crush you though as he supported his weight on his elbows. You felt him slowly grind between your spread legs his hips against yours, even though you were both clothed you could feel his bulge and despite everything it made you nervous. He ran his flesh hand on your side until he reached the hem of your shirt and went under it to rub your naked skin.

"B-Bucky... I-I-" You broke the kiss and you were both panting. "I-I'm not ready..." You confessed. You were afraid you were ruining the moment and that he was going to be mad at you but instead he put a chaste kiss on your lips and moved off of you.

"I understand." He said as he laid back next to you.

"You're not mad?" You asked timidly.

"I'd be a monster if I got mad at you for that." He grabbed your hand and brought it to his lips. "I'll wait as long as you need me to, doll."

"I-I'm sorry." You said. Bucky opened his arms and hugged you against him.

"You don't have to be sorry for something like this, doll. I don't want to do anything with you if you're not 100% comfortable." Bucky reassured you and put a kiss on top of your head. You wrapped your arms around his torso and rested your head on his chest.

"Thank you."

"C'mon, you should rest now. I'll stay with you." The winter soldier released you and you both laid on the bed.

  
  


\---

  
  


When you woke up Bucky was gone from your bed and you felt terribly lonely. You missed his warmth, you wanted him to wake you up with soft kisses again and to be surrounded by those strong arms of his. God, what time was it? You felt like you slept all day, it's as if you were catching up all the hours of sleep you missed while you were on the mission. When you looked by the window the sun was setting down, it was probably around 5pm or something. Another thing you noticed: You were starving. You didn't even get to eat the crepes Steve made this morning. Your body felt so incredibly weak. You changed into some new clothes and decided to head straight for the kitchen, hoping you were not going to meet anybody there. Your confidence has taken a blow lately and you didn't felt as comfortable as before. You only trusted Bucky. You didn't know if the others were home or if Bucky had joined them maybe. You turned on the doorknob and walked to the elevator.

"Blessed." You let out a pleasant sigh. No one was in the kitchen. "Doubly blessed." You opened the fridge and Steve's crepes were there. You poured yourself a glass of milk after you grabbed the plate of crepes and put down everything on the counter. You literally salivated at the sight, they looked so delicious. For a moment you almost wished you could share them with Bucky since they were his favorites too but too bad you haven't catched sight of him in the tower. You filled your crepes with your favorite fillings after you sat on a chair and finally took a first bite. Oh God, this was Heaven. You died and you had reached Paradise. You felt rewarded after this terrible morning, no one had disturbed you while you were eating, no one made fun of you, asked you about Bucky or teased you. When you were done you cleaned up after yourself and left the kitchen. Where were the others?? This had started to worry you.

You had walked past the living space and you heard voices in the distance.

"He can't stay here! He's too dangerous!" Tony argued.

"I'm telling you, he won't do anything. I'll look after him." You recognized Thor's voice.

"Thor, I have to agree with Tony, we can't trust him." Steve said.

"No one is trusting him, I'm not trusting him." Thor continued. "But I need to keep him where I can watch what he's doing. I can't go on Asgard right now and he can't be trusted with your military or SHIELD or whatever." What the heck were they talking about?

"I have a bad feeling about this." Bruce said.

You stepped inside the room and all the Avengers turned their heads towards you.

"You told us she was sleeping!" Tony said to Bucky.

"She was when I left."

"Well, it's too late now." Nat said.

"What is going on here?" You asked.

"Ooh, this is the one you didn't want me to find out about?" You turned your head towards the new voice you didn't recognize. Your eyes widened at his sight.

"Is that the guy from New York?? The God of mischief?" You asked in shock. You had heard about what he did in the news.

"Brother! You didn't tell me I was popular on Midgard." Loki chuckled as he spoke to Thor but his eyes remained on you.

"Listen to me Brother, you lay one finger on her and I will execute you myself." Thor treatened his brother for you, as surprised as it made you.

"I will kill him first if he does anything to her." Bucky spoke and you blushed. This was nice and all but you were still confused, what happened?

"Bucky, you should take [Y/N] out of the room." Steve spoke to his best friend. You stared at him confused, the winter soldier put his hand on your back and hurried you to leave. You crossed eyes with Loki before he was out of your sight.

"What's going on?" You asked Bucky in the hallway.

"Thor thinks his brother is up to something, he's asked Tony for him to stay in the tower while he tries to find out Loki's plan. Of course the others are against it for... your safety."

"I-I see..."

"No offense, doll, but you can't protect yourself and your powers are useful to the Avengers. They can't afford to lose you."

"What about you?" The words left your mouth too quickly for you to realize what you had just asked. He smiled at you before replying.

"I have other reasons to not want to lose you." Bucky said before leaning and kissing you softly on the lips. Your legs had turned into cotton.

  
  


"Whatever it is that you're hiding from me, Brother, I will find out who this girl is." Loki promised to the Avengers.

 


	10. God of Mischief

After you and Bucky left the Avengers with Loki in the living space you both had retreated to your room and you were currently in each other's arms. He was sitting on your bed and you were between his legs, he was hugging you from behind.

"Doll, you understand? You absolutely can't use your powers in front of Loki." The winter soldier reminded you once again.

"Yes, Bucky. You've been explaining it to me for twenty minutes now." You chuckled. "I've heard of what he did, I won't underestimate him."

"I'll never leave you alone with him anyway."

"Are you gonna chain me?" You said as you turned your head to face him.

"Don't tempt me." He teased. You rolled your eyes.

"How long does he plan on staying here anyway?"

"I don't know. Guess you'll have to ask Thor." Bucky sighed. "This is such a bad idea."

"It's gonna be fine. I'm sure Loki won't try anything as long as you are all here. I mean, you're the goddamn Avengers. He knows he can't win." You reassured him.

"You're an Avengers too now." He said to you.

"Don't be ridiculous. I'll never be an Avengers. I'm like- the medic team."

"That's an important role."

"Oh yeah, I'm aware. I'm just saying I'll never be on the front line or actually fight a bad guy. I have no skills."

"I can teach you some stuff if you want." Bucky said to you with a raised eyebrow.

"Don't be ridiculous. Have you seen me?"

"What? Natasha is a woman too and she can fight."

"I wasn't talking about that but _thank you_." You ironized. "I know women can fight and Nat is fast, brave, **thin**..." You paused. "I'm slow, fat and stupid." Bucky started laughing and you elbowed him in the stomach. "Hey..."

"I really wish you could see yourself through my eyes." You blushed as you faced forward to not look at him. "We all have some flaws but somehow you think you have all the flaws in the world and I sometimes wonder why."

"Well..." You started. "People have reminded me of my flaws all my life..."

"So if I show you and remind you of your advantages daily will you start believing in them?" You took a few seconds to think.

"Who knows..." You let out in a quiet voice. "It's gonna be hard to erase twenty-five years of... what I've been through." Bucky hugged you tighter as he put a kiss on your clothed shoulder.

"I promise you I'll show you your worth everyday." You smiled as you put your hands on his forearms that were around your stomach. "And I'll begin with telling you that you're not stupid at all." He put a kiss against your cheek. "Trust me I know what stupid is, you'd know too if you had met Steve back when we were kids." You giggled against him.

"What was he like?" You asked.

"Always getting in trouble. He didn't even do it on purpose most of the time, a real stupid boy." You turned around to face him. Bucky was lost in his thoughts and he had a tender smile on his face. You gently caressed his cheek, your touch had brought him back and he guided his gaze back to you. He took your hand that was on his cheek and kissed the palm as he stared into your eyes. Your stomach did a backflip as a blush had crept on your cheeks, he always did that to you and you loved it.

Your heart was beating so fast inside your chest, this time you leaned on him and kissed him on the mouth. Bucky let out a surprised gasp against your lips and it made you smile as you kissed him softly. You broke the kiss after a few seconds but Bucky put his hand behind your head and brought you back against him. He couldn't let go and get enough of your mouth, the winter soldier hungrily kissed you until you both had to pull back for air.

"Bucky..." You breathed his name.

"Don't say my name like that or I won't be able to control myself, doll..." You smiled as he rested his forehead against yours.

"Bucky~" You teased as you wrapped your arms around his neck.

"Oh, that's how you wanna play it?" Suddenly Bucky put his hands on your sides and started tickling you. You burst out laughing and tried to remove his hands off you.

"S-Stop, I can't breathe!" You tried to get away from him but he gently pushed you on the bed until your back hit the mattress. "P-Please!" You laughed harder as the winter soldier absolutely did not stop tickling you. Bucky had you squirming under him, all your efforts to get away from him had been useless.

"Tell me you're sorry." He smirked.

"I-I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" You said between pants, tears had appeard in the corner of your eyes. His hands finally stopped their torture on you and you took that opportunity to catch your breath again. Bucky leaned on you and rested his head on your clothed chest. You ran your fingers through his soft brunette locks, he stayed like this without saying anything, just listening to your heartbeat.

Suddenly a knock against your door made you both jump out of the bed. Bucky didn't even know why he reacted like this, he doesn't care if the others see him being intimate with you but _your_ reaction startled him. You opened the door after quickly rearranging your clothes and hair.

"Hey..." You found Nat at your door, she glanced from you to Bucky in the back of your room. "What were you guys doing?" She asked, suspicious.

"Discussing." Bucky waved with his hand.

"Uh huh... Well if you're done with that we need to talk about the Loki situation. Would you both do us the honor of joining in the plan?"

"O-Of course." You threw quickly as you stepped out of the room. Bucky followed behind you after closing the door of your room.

"Did you tell her?" Nat asked Bucky.

"Yeah, don't worry, she's smart. She won't show her powers to him." Nat crossed eyes with you and you nodded.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Well, Loki will be staying here until we figure out whatever he's doing so we can keep a close eye on him." Tony said. He looked tired as if he argued for hours.

"Fury and SHIELD knows about this too. Just in case things go wrong." Steve added.

"We will constantly watch over him so if he tries something fishy stay on guard." Tony continued.

"My brother can't be trusted but he's not stupid. He knows he doesn't have the upper hand right now." Thor said.

"Well, thank you for that." Loki ironized. The Asgardian was also in the room.

"As long as he's here I'm not leaving [Y/N] alone in the tower." Bucky added as he glared at the God of mischief. But Loki turned his head towards you and started analyzing you. There was definitively something going on about you he thought.

"We're not leaving him alone with anyone." Steve said.

"As I was saying Loki is not stupid, he's not going to attack us. He knows what will happen if he does." Thor continued.

"Yeah, well I'm still not gonna trust him or you with that." Bucky chuckled dryly.

"He's simply playing right now. It's what he does." Thor concluded.

"Well, just remember everyone, keep an eye on him and look out for each other." Tony reminded you all. Loki's been watching the scene with a little smirk on his face. "Alright, I'm starving. Anyone wants shawarma?"

  
  


You had brought your dinner to your room, after everything that's happened lately you didn't feel that comfortable eating with everyone else again. You had simply told them you felt tired and you wanted quiet which they didn't argue with. They had other things to think about, everyone was a bit on edge since the God of mischief was in the tower. You, you also had other things in mind.

Bucky. You and Bucky had kissed. And not only once but _several times_. What was going on? You always thought that the only reason he liked hanging out with you was because he pitied you and you were both lonely, you thought he simply needed a friend and you were okay with filling that role. You absolutely did not want to think that he could have genuine feelings for you, that was impossible. After all what could you bring him? You were a mess and you knew that Bucky already had problems on his own, you couldn't trouble him with yours.

But what if there was more? Your heart started racing at the thought that he might actually like you like you liked him. You were too afraid to ask him anything in fear of his answers and he never asked you either so maybe it was indeed nothing. You didn't understand. How could you though? Before you joined the Stark tower you had never had friends or people who behaved like they cared about you. You couldn't recognize those feelings. If Bucky had indeed more than friendly feelings for you he needed to explicitely express them for you to realize it.

Your chest started to ache. You had fallen and _deep_. You knew it inside of you no matter how hard you tried to shut the voice in your head, you loved him. When you were with him nothing else existed and he healed the deep wounds and scars that you had. What the winter soldier made you feel was pure happiness. Your old memories of past abuse were still there but when you stared in Bucky's eyes he made them go away. No one had ever looked at you the way he did.

You pushed your plate of shawarma away and laid on the bed, you stared at the ceiling before closing your eyes. You wanted to cry, incertitude was driving you crazy. You took a deep breath before getting up and getting out of your room. You headed to the kitchen to wash your plate and ustensils that you had brought to your room. To your surprise you ran into no one on your way there, it wasn't that late so you doubted the Avengers went to bed already.

Before heading back to your room you took a detour to the library, you had finished the previous book and you needed a distraction to help you think about something else than your feelings for the winter soldier.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. the books that talk about anything but love please." You ordered the AI.

"Would you be interested in history books?" The AI asked. You sighed.

"Sure." You passed a hand through your hair.

"Second section on your right." The AI replied. You walked to the shelf and picked a random book. "World War II. The 40's..." You put the book back in its place. "Looks like everything in this goddamn library will remind me of him." You gave up and left the library. You've been waiting in front of the elevator doors to go back to your room and when they opened your eyes widened.

"Y-"

"Well, well, well... What do we have here?" Loki smirked.

"How is it that you're by yourself??" You asked as you took a step back.

"Oh, they think I'm locked inside the room they gave me but it's just a projection. I'm actually right in front of you." He said naturally as if it all made sense to you and you were supposed to be reassured by that. He took a few steps forward, the elevator doors closed behind him and got called upstairs. You were now alone with the God of mischief in the empty hallway that linked to the library.

"W-What are you doing anyway?" You asked him. You had no idea what to do and how to react around him. After all he was indeed dangerous and you couldn't protect yourself but you also knew that Loki couldn't be that stupid and if he attacked you it would sign his immediate death contract.

"No need to shiver my dear, I won't touch you." He said with a grin as you kept staring at him.

"And I'm supposed to trust you?" You rolled your eyes.

"I know that you and the others are hiding something from me." He said as he locked eyes with you.

"Ok and?"

"Why would I kill you if I might find some utility in you for me?" Loki smirked again.

"So the only reason you won't attack me is because you think I'm gonna help you?" You let out a dry laugh.

"Well that and also my brother would kill me for harming one of his friends." He added. You sighed before taking a few steps forward and pressing the elevator button. You were sure he was harmless this time. Still you got startled when he grabbed your arm.

"Who are you?" He asked you as he towered you with all his height.

"[Y/N]." You replied.

"Tell me [Y/N], what is it that you're hiding from me?"

"Nothing. Now if you could let go of my arm before I start screaming." Loki stared into your eyes for a little while before finally letting you go.

"I will find out what it is. That you can trust."

"Goodnight, God of mischief." You said as you got into the elevator. You saw him smile before the doors closed.

  
  


\---

  
  


"I think you guys might have a problem." You told the Avengers as you walked into the living space. Half of them were there except Tony, Bruce and Nat.

"What do you mean?" Steve asked you as his brows furrowed.

"I just met with Loki in the hallway that goes to the library." You let out.

"What?!" Thor said as he got up from the couch.

"Did he touch you? Do anything to you?" Bucky jumped on you.

"No, no, which was honestly surprising. He also said he won't harm me."

"He can't be trusted, doll." Bucky reminded you.

"I know, and don't worry I didn't tell him anything about me." You continued.

"How did he find you?" Steve asked.

"Oh I was actually in the library. Loki also told me that the him in the locked room or wherever you guys put him, it's a projection." Thor let out a dry chuckle.

"Of course."

"But I don't think Loki was looking for me, he looked as surprised as I was when we ran into each other. I think he was just looking around."

"I'm gonna chain him this time." Thor said as he walked out.

"Why didn't you call for help?" Bucky asked you as he put a hand on your shoulder.

"It was fine really, I honestly don't think he lied back there. If he wanted to harm me he could've done it and he didn't." Bucky sighed deeply.

"You can't trust-"

"I get it!" You said a bit louder than you intended to. You looked at him and Steve before getting out of the room. Steve crossed eyes with his best friend and gave him an apologetic look before walking out too.

"[Y/N], wait!" The captain ran after you. You turned around to face Steve as you crossed your arms on your chest. "Bucky is right you know, I don't think you know Loki as much as we do and what he's capable of." He said.

"I saw what happened in New York, I know how dangerous he is. I'm just saying that Thor is right, Loki is not stupid and he will not try to kill me while he's being watched by everyone in the tower." You sighed. "Why are we even arguing about this, I feel like I'm defending him against you all."

"I know you mean well, we're just worried." Steve paused. "Are you mad against Bucky?" You rolled your eyes.

"You know I'm not." The captain smiled at you.

"Alright, then please do me a favor and go talk to him or he's gonna sulk all night."

"Fine." Steve put a hand on your shoulder.

"Goodnight [Y/N]." He left you alone in the hallway. You returned back in the living space where you found Bucky sitting on the couch with a depressed expression. You heart ached inside your chest. You approached him and wrapped your arms around his neck from behind.

"I-I'm sorry." You said quietly as you buried your face on his shoulder.

"Doll..." He sounded relieved.

"I didn't mean to yell." Bucky put his hands on your forearms as he smiled. He turned around and pulled you against him until you rolled on the couch and laid on his lap.

"I can't lose you doll, I won't let anybody take you away from me." His words warmed your chest so much you felt like crying. Bucky hugged you tight against him, his head went in the crook of your neck and he kissed you there as his hand rubbed your thighs.

"I'm not going anywhere, Bucky." You reassured him. He left a trail of soft kisses from your neck to your jaw until his lips finally met yours. The winter soldier kissed you passionately, you felt his arms get tighter around your waist and you heart beat faster.

"Come with me." He said after he broke the kiss. You both got up from the couch and he took your hand before walking out of the living space and heading to the elevator. It stopped on your floor as you expected. Bucky guided you to his room and closed the door behind you. "Get on the bed." He said to you.

"Bucky..." You looked at him not sure of what he wanted.

"Don't worry I'm not going to jump on you." He reassured you. "Just the couch was uncomfortable and I wanted to keep kissing you." He said as he approached you. "You okay with that?" He asked. You smiled as you nodded. "Then get on this bed before I make you." Bucky warned you with a smirk.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Loki stans you're boutta get fed (・ω<)


	11. Birthday girl

"Hmm..." You bit your lower lip to muffle a moan. Bucky licked and sucked on your neck to intentionally leave a mark on your skin. You gripped his shirt in your hand as your eyes were closed, you loved everything he was doing to you. He lightly chuckled against your skin after you couldn't help a pleasant sigh escape your mouth.

"Doll you can't make sounds like that, you have no idea what they do to me." He whispered to your ear.

"Y-You ask me to not make sounds but you do everything for me to make them." You blushed as you let go of his shirt and turned your head the other away. You were laid on his bed and the winter soldier was on his fours above you, his head hidden in the crook of your neck. He turned your head with two fingers so you could face him. Bucky stared into your eyes as he licked his lips, a smirk appearing on his face. "W-Why are you looking at me like that?" You asked him.

"You're so beautiful." He simply let out. You rolled your eyes. "Why do you do that everytime I compliment you?" Bucky asked. You sighed.

"Because it's not true."

"I think I'm the one who gets to decide." He argued.

"You're only saying it to be nice. It's not true, I'm not." You turned your head again to not look at his face. "Can we please not talk about it?" You asked.

"No, I want to talk about it." He said as he backed up and sat on the bed in front of you. He grabbed your arms and made you sit too. You looked down as you played with the blanket in front of you. "Go on, tell me."

"What do you want me to say Buck, I feel like I'm repeating myself and whining constantly and I hate it."

"It's because of the people you used to know?" You nodded without lifting your head. You got up and gave him your back as you walked towards the glass wall, you didn't want him to see you crying again. But Bucky got up and walked in front of you, as he saw tears in your eyes his heart ached and he opened his arms for you. "Come here." You hugged him and cried quietly against his chest. The winter soldier gently rubbed your back as you sobbed. "I promise you I'm not saying it just to be nice. I really believe it."

"B-Bucky-" You started.

"I love it when you smile or laugh, I think it really suits you, you glow and shine like the sun and it warms my soul." He said to you with a smile. "To me that's the definition of beautiful. And you're the prettiest thing I've laid my eyes on."

"I'm sorry..." You started crying a little harder.

"For what doll?" Bucky asked as he put a hand behind your head and lowered his eyes to look at you.

"I-I just don't believe it." This time your scars were too deep to just be erased with words, as gentle as they were.

"It's okay." He said as he put a kiss on your forehead. "I promise you one day I'll make you believe it."

"I really doubt it." You said as you backed up from his chest and sniffed.

"Well, not with that attitude that's for sure." Bucky said as he laughed. It made you smile a little. "Are you feeling better?" You shrugged. "Wait. I got an idea. Don't move from here." Bucky said before he got out of his room. You were confused but did as he said. You sat back on the edge of his bed and waited for him. Five minutes later he came back and he was holding a tub of icecream with two spoons.

"God, you're perfect." You let out which made him laugh. "How did you guess my favorite flavor?" You asked him as he sat on the bed next to you and handed you a spoon.

"Are you kidding? I just picked mine."

"This is getting scary, first the crepes and now the icecream." You said with a giggle.

"Maybe we were really meant to be for each other." You turned your head and looked at him with a small smile on your face as he opened the lid.

"Thank you, Bucky." You were thankful he was always there for you and doing everything to make you happy.

  
  


\---

  
  


After eating ice cream with the winter soldier you both decided it was getting very late so you bid him goodnight and returned to your room. He let you go with a kiss and closed the door behind you. You laid on your bed and closed your eyes with one final thought for Bucky.

You woke up a little later than usual since you went to bed late too, you stretched your arms before dragging yourself to the bathroom to clean up. What would be waiting for you today? You had a little idea. You put on some clothes after your shower and then headed out for breakfast. You opened the door to your room and almost broke your jaw as you fell down, your feet got tangled in something.

"What the f-" You rubbed your aching palms as you landed on your hands thankfully. There was a huge bouquet of flowers right in front of your door. You picked them up and noticed there was a little card in the middle of the pretty and colorful plants.

" _Happy birthday, doll_ _~_ "

You smiled as you rolled your eyes. Okay, even though you almost broke a bone you had to admit they were very beautiful and you greatly appreciated Bucky's gesture. You left the flowers in your room and then walked to the elevator.

When you arrived in the kitchen you didn't find the usual members for breakfast, it was indeed pretty late in the morning already and they were all busy. But you did find two Asgardians, Thor and Loki.

"Good morning." You waved to them as you walked towards the fridge.

"Ah, [Y/N]! Happy birthday!" Thor greeted you with a huge grin, he walked towards you and embraced you in his muscular arms. He squeezed you so tight you let out a little shriek. "Sorry." He added with a smile as he released you.

"Thank you, Thor." You smiled back at him nevertheless. Loki's been watching the scene quietly and when you crossed eyes with him he spoke.

"Happy birthday, [Y/N]." He said with a smirk. "I would embrace you too but-" He raised his wrists to show you he was chained. "By the way, I _thank you_ for your discretion." The God of mischief added with irony.

"You didn't tell me to not warn them I ran into you." You teased with a little smile in the corner of your lips. Loki kept staring at you as he raised one eyebrow.

"You should've stayed in your room." Thor said to his brother. As they quarreled you poured yourself a bowl of cereals and then joined them at the table.

"So how long do you plan on staying here?" You asked Loki.

"I'm not staying here, I'm actually a prisoner of this tower." He reminded you and Thor.

"And you shall return to Asgard once I find out what you're planning." Thor said.

"I think my plans have changed." Loki said as he glanced at you. You raised your eyebrows as you digged into your cereals. "Tell me, what are you hiding from me?"

"If your new plan is me, you're gonna get pretty bored _**and**_ disappointed, God of mischief." You smiled. "There is nothing about me. I'm just a normal human being." Thor grinned at you before looking at his brother.

"You're wasting your time, Loki."

"Lying has never been your forte, brother." Loki smirked. "And it's not yours either, [Y/N]." You and Thor exchanged glances as you both shrugged. It's like you mentally agreed to annoy the God of mischief.

"If we're being sincere here, why don't **you** share with us what were your plans before you came into this tower?" You asked Loki.

"Tell me your secret and I will tell you mine." Loki smirked.

"Hmm, can't do that. You can't be trusted."

"She's right, you can't be trusted." The God of thunder added with a playful tone.

"ENOUGH!" You and Thor held back a laugh as Loki was losing his cool.

"Anyway. Gentlemen, it's been a pleasure." You bowed after you got up as you had finished your breakfast.

"See you later, [Y/N]." Thor waved at you.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Mr. Stark has asked for your presence in his lab, miss." F.R.I.D.A.Y. called out to you as you were chilling in your room.

"Oh, okay." You said as you got up from your bed. You hadn't seen anybody except the two Gods in the kitchen earlier. You wondered what Tony wanted from you. You've never been in his lab either. "Can you guide me there please? It's been a long time since Tony gave me a tour of the tower."

"Yes, go into the elevator please." You followed F.R.I.D.A.Y.'s instructions until you had finally reached Tony's lab. You saw behind the glass door that Bruce and Pepper were with him too.

"Hey!" He greeted you with a grin after you knocked on the door and he waved you to come in. "Happy birthday!" Tony approached you and hugged you.

"Thank you." You said with a shy smile.

"Happy birthday, [Y/N]." Bruce came and embraced you too. Wow, you weren't used to being hugged so much in one day, it made you feel something though, you really appreciated it.

"Thank you, Bruce." You smiled at him too.

"[Y/N], I don't think you've met-"

"I'm Pepper, CEO of Stark industries." She gave you her hand as she interrupted Tony.

"Pepper Stark, my wife." Tony added as he looked kinda offended.

"Happy birthday." She said to you with a smile.

"T-Thank you, I'm honored. I-I heard about you of course." You shook her hand as you were intimidated.

"Anyway, I wanted to announce you. I'll throw a party for you tonight." Tony said to you with a grin.

"Oh, wow." Your eyes widened. "A-Are you sure? I mean, I don't know anybody and-"

"Don't worry, you don't have to do anything. Just show up tonight." He said to you.

"A-Alright."

"You're free to go. Oh and by the way, what's your favorite color?" Tony asked you before you left.

  
  


You went back to your room after leaving the lab. A party. Damn, okay. You had never been to a party before, you had no idea what to expect and especially from Tony. And suddenly realization hit you with something. Oh God. Party meant dressing up. What the fuck were you going to put on?? All you wore were black leggings and oversized hoodies to cover your body as much as you could. You couldn't escape this party, after all it was for you and you were pretty sure Tony would drag you out of your room to attend it. Your heart started racing inside your chest, you were on the verge of getting a panic attack you could feel it. What were you going to do?

A knock at your door got you out of your reverie. You took a deep breath before getting up and opening the door. When you saw Bucky you jumped in his arms and hugged him tightly.

"That's a nice welcome." He said with a smile.

"I-I'm sorry I just needed this right now." He frowned.

"Why? What's wrong?" The winter soldier asked in worry as he wrapped his arms around you.

"I-I was just panicking a little, don't worry. It happens..." You explained. You felt him kiss the top of your head.

"Do you want to tell me about it?" He asked. You pulled him in your room and closed the door. Bucky took place on the edge of your bed and you sat down next to him.

"Tony told me he's throwing a party tonight and I-I just overthought as always." Bucky put his arm around your shoulder.

"Why is that?" He said as he looked at you.

"Y-You're gonna laugh..." You turned your head the other way.

"Have I ever?" He's asked you as he raised one eyebrow.

"I'm sorry, you're right." You paused to take a deep breath again. "I-I've never been to a party before... A-And..." You sighed as you rolled your eyes at yourself. "I have nothing to wear."

"That's not a problem. First of all you won't be alone at the party, I'll be there so you don't have to worry about not finding your place or anything." He started. "And for the clothes I have a solution." You raised one eyebrow as you looked at him.

"Really?" You asked.

"Yes, but first of all I want to do something else." Bucky said as he leaned on you and kissed you. You gasped in surprise against his mouth but still kissed him back. Bucky smiled against your lips as he gently caressed your cheek. "Happy birthday, [Y/N]." He whispered against your mouth. You felt like your heart was going to burst out of your chest and your stomach was doing backflips again, you loved what he was doing to you.

"Thank you for your flowers this morning." You said before kissing him again. "And just-" You kissed him again. "Thank you for you." And again. Bucky grinned as he looked into your eyes and then kissed you again some more. You were both giggling like teenagers and most importantly, you were happy.

"I have a gift for you." The winter soldier announced after breaking the kiss. Your eyes widened.

"W-What?" You couldn't help a smile appear into your face. Bucky took a tiny silk pouch from his pocket and put it into your hands. The top was tied with a little knot.

"Open it." He smiled at you. You untied the little knot, you noticed your fingers were shaking a bit in anticipation and excitation. You dropped the content of the pouch in the middle of your palm. Your jaw dropped at the sight of the gift. It was a beautiful thin necklace with a heart shaped pendant. You started tearing up as you looked at it.

"Bucky, it's beautiful." You let out quietly. "N-No one has ever offered me something like this... o-or anything at all..." You wiped your tears with your fingers. "I-I can't accept it."

"It's your first gift and you won't even accept it?" Bucky joked. "You're just gonna let me ridicule myself as I return it to the jeweler?" He let out a hearty laugh as he looked at your face and you were crying your eyes out. Bucky wrapped his arms around you and hugged you tightly. "I'm glad you like it."

"I really don't deserve you." You mumbled against his chest.

"Yes, you do." He said as he put his hands on each side of your face. "You've done so much for me and you don't even realize it." Bucky kissed your forehead before letting you go. "Let me put it on you." You handed him the necklace and turned around. Bucky placed the necklace around your neck and closed it. "There you go." You grabbed the pendant between your fingers and looked at it. You wanted to cry again but you were happy. As you stared at it you noticed something weird on the side.

"Wait, is it one of these pendants that opens??" You asked the winter soldier as you turned around again to face him. He nodded with a smile. You carefully opened it and when you looked inside it you couldn't help smiling. "You're so cocky."

"What? I think I looked my best on that day." Inside the pendant was a tiny picture of Bucky, and since it was in black and white you figured it was from the 40's.

"You do, I love your smile." You said as you stared a little longer at the picture. The winter soldier catched your mouth with his again and you kissed passionately. You ran one of your hands through his hair and he wrapped his metal arm around your waist to bring you closer to him.

"As much as I'd love to keep kissing you all day I'm afraid I have to go, doll." Bucky said after he broke the kiss.

"But where?" You asked him.

"Well, you have to take care of your clothing problem for tonight and there's a few things I need to do. Go change and wait here, okay? Trust me."

"O-Okay." You said a bit sad.

"Please don't make that face doll or I won't be able to leave." Bucky said after he got up. He put a kiss on your head before waving at you and leaving your room.

When he was gone you did as he said and when you were putting on your shoes there was another knock at your door.

"Hey birthday girl, I heard we got some shopping to do." Natasha announced to you with a grin when you opened the door.

 


	12. Pretty woman

In the afternoon Natasha drove you to the luxurious streets in New York to help you get a nice outfit for your birthday party tonight. You were thankful she agreed to come with you. During the car ride she told you it's Bucky who asked her. You got out of the car and entered a luxurious shop, you felt so out of place in the middle of the pretty women around you, be it the customers or workers. Everyone was wearing heels, had makeup on and wore pretty clothes.

"I-I shouldn't have come-" You told Nat as you were about to leave the shop but she held your arm firmly.

"You're not going anywhere, [Y/N]. We'll go back once we find you an outfit." She pushed you into a fitting room. "Take off your clothes and wait for me. I'm gonna grab you a few dresses to try on."

You sighed deeply after you closed the curtain. You were there anyway and Nat was being nice enough to come and help you. You didn't want to waste her time so you did as she said and waited for her. Five minutes later she came back with clothes under her arm.

"You don't even know my size..." You whined.

"I have a good eye. Try them on." She ordered you. You grabbed the first dress and looked at it before putting it on. It was pretty and you were sure it would look good on anybody if that anybody wasn't **you**.

"I-I'm not sure..." You said as you got out after putting on the dress and asking for Nat's opinion who was sitting on a chair in front of your booth.

"Hmm, I think the color doesn't suit you. Try another." And you did. You tried all the dresses and in your opinion you looked bad in all of them. "I'm not a fan of the pearls." Nat commented.

"The problems aren't the dresses Nat, it's me." You let out. "I tried all these dresses and I looked horrible in all of them."

"Maybe it's this shop, let's visit another." She told you as she got up. She noticed your depressed expression. "[Y/N], you're not the only chubby woman in the world. There's a dress out there waiting for you and we're gonna find it. We're just in the wrong shop." She reassured you with a smile. "C'mon, let's get out of there." You were thankful she was being nice and patient with you.

You had visited many shops in vain, you could tell Nat was getting frustrated too but for you she didn't want to give up. She promised Bucky she would help you find an outfit and she intended on keeping that promise.

"It's fine, Nat. We don't have to keep running around until night time." You told her. You honestly just wanted to go back to your room and cry.

"Oh, let's check this one. It's my favorite." She told you with a grin. You followed her anyway. She did have the keys of the car so you couldn't really escape. "C'mon, in the fitting room! You know the drill by now." You took off your clothes automatically like a machine and waited for her, you were used to this now. "Oh my god, [Y/N]. I think I found something." She handed you a black dress, you wondered what was so special about it since it looked very simple but then it hit you.

Yes, it's exactly because it looked simple that it would be perfect. The other dresses were all too sophisticated or had too much details into them, some of the bright colors made you look like a cupcake but this one didn't attack the eyes. You tried it on and you actually felt comfortable. Even more, for the first time you felt **pretty**. The dress featured an elasticized off-the-shoulders neckline, long sleeves and a back zip closure. It wasn't constricted around your stomach and the hem ended above your knees but still covered your butt. This was definitively the dress you needed. You opened the curtain with a smile to show Nat.

"I-I love this one." You told her with emotions.

"Wow, [Y/N]! You look so good!" Nat complimented you with widened eyes. "Do a little twirl." She asked with a smile and you turned on yourself. "Girl, you're gonna make a few heads spin." She teased. "C'mon, we're getting this one." You closed the curtain and put your clothes back on. Nat also helped you pick a pair of shoes to go with the dress and at the end you walked to the cashier.

"I-It's very expansive though, how am I gonna pay for this?" You told her a little panicked. But Nat already had her card out and she handed it to the cashier.

"Isn't it your birthday today?" She winked at you. "Happy birthday, [Y/N]." She told you with a smile. You took her into your arms and hugged her tightly with teary eyes, you were very thankful for everything she did for you today.

"Thank you so much." You told her as the cashier handed you the bag. Nat took your arm before walking out.

"C'mon, let's grab some donuts." She said with a grin.

  
  


You were now both sitting at a café sipping some iced coffee and eating donuts.

"So... You and Bucky..?" She started as she raised one eyebrow.

"Right off the bat huh?" You joked.

"I think you owe me this one." She smirked.

"Alright, ask your questions." You told her.

"What's going on between you both?" Nat asked as she put her cup down. You took a deep breath.

"T-To be really honest, I'm not sure. I can tell you about what **I** feel but I-I don't know for him."

"Alright, and what do **you** feel?"

"I-I never experienced something like this with anybody. He's so nice to me, he always defends me, cares for me, really does everything to make me smile. Nobody had ever done this before."

"Do you have feelings for him?" She asked you with a little smile. You nodded slowly.

"Yes, I think I do." You took a deep breath. "When I see him my stomach does backflips and when he touches me my heart races so painfully in my chest but i-it doesn't feel bad you know?"

"What have you done so far?"

"Only what you guys have been seeing. Hugs, cuddles, he's constantly teasing me too but it's never in the mean way like I experienced in the past. W-We uh..." You paused as you blushed. "We also kissed." Nat's eyes widened.

"No way... Wow, I would've never expected Bucky to actually allow himself to be intimate with somebody. Do you think he likes you too?" You lowered your head.

"That seems impossible to me. I mean, what is there to like? I'm not pretty, smart or an interesting person. Why would he?" You said in a low voice.

"Then why would he act like he does?" Nat asked you.

"I-I don't know, I think maybe he's just lonely? Like I am and we all need human warmth, maybe he went to me because it was easier."

"Is this really what you think?" Nat asked you with a piercing gaze. "I think deep inside you, you know the answer to your questions." She said to you. "Did you guys talk about this?"

"N-No, I mean we compliment each other and stuff like this but we never confessed or anything."

"Maybe you should." Nat said as she took a sip of her drink.

"I-I'm scared." You admitted.

"I don't think you should be. Bucky's changed since you're in the tower. He seems more human. Before you came here he was just a shadow. He rarely spoke, never hanged out with us. I feel like you actually made him live and if I'm not too wrong I think he did that to you too huh?" She raised one eyebrow. "Who were you before you came into this tower?" Realization hit you.

"A shadow." You replied.

"C'mon, it's getting late. Let's go back to the tower." Nat said as she got up and gave you her hand.

  
  


\---

  
  


When you arrived in the parking lot you and Nat took the elevator and stopped in the floor that lead to the living space. You crashed into the couch after this long afternoon running around from shop to shops in New York.

"Hey, you're back." Bucky said as he entered the room with Steve.

"Welcome back, girls." Steve approached you both. "And happy birthday, [Y/N]." He smiled before leaning on you and putting a kiss on your cheek.

"Thank you, Steve." You blushed lightly.

"How was your afternoon?" Bucky asked as he sat next to you on the edge of the couch.

"Tiring." You replied. "But hey, at least I found something!" You said as you grabbed your bag but Nat held your arm.

"No no, he can't see until tonight." She stopped you as she smirked.

"Okay. Sorry, I can't show you." You told him with a small smile.

"Well, you both look like you had fun." Steve said.

"We had a good talk." Nat said as she winked at Steve.

"I'm exhausted, I think I'm gonna take a shower and little nap before the party." You told them as you got up. "Nat, thank you so much again." You said as you leaned on her to hug her before walking out.

"I'm gonna help you with that." Bucky said as he followed you out.

Now that they were alone Steve sat next to Natasha on the couch.

"She told me she had feelings for him." She let out to Steve who's eyes widened.

"Are you kidding? He told me the same." Both of them let out a laugh.

"Wait, did he also tell you that he's afraid because he thinks [Y/N] doesn't like him?" Nat asked.

"Roughly, yeah. That's what he said." They both laughed again.

"My God, they're the same. It's kinda cute." She held her stomach as she laughed.

"Do you think they'll figure it out by themselves or should we step in?" Steve asked the redhaired woman.

"Let them, I don't think it's gonna take much longer." Nat said.

  
  


\---

  
  


In the elevator Bucky couldn't help himself, it's been far too long since you've left him alone in the tower. He pushed you against the elevator wall and crashed his lips on yours. The winter soldier pushed his body against yours, he needed to feel you on him.

"B-Buck-!" You tried to speak against his mouth. He broke the kiss and went for your neck. "S-Stop! What if someone sees us?" Your hand went through his soft hair.

"Don't care." He said against your skin before biting you.

"Ouch! B-Be gentle..." You said. He raised his head back to your level, he smirked at you before licking his lips and glancing at your mouth. You gulped as you stared into his half lidded eyes. Thankfully the elevator finally stopped at your floor and no one had seen you and Bucky. You stepped out with the winter soldier following you and entered your room. You had just time to close the door and drop your bag on the floor that Bucky had already jumped on you again. "Bucky!" You called him out as you giggled.

"Yes, doll?" He replied innocently as he dragged you towards the bed before dropping on it with you trapped between his arms.

"I'm tired."

"You can sleep while I kiss you." He smiled against your cheek.

"That's not how it works."

"It can though."

"Buck!"

"Okay, alright. You sleep but I get to hold you, deal?" He smirked. You rolled your eyes.

"Fine." You let out. Bucky proceeded to lay on the bed and then held his arms open for you to snuggle against him. You moved next to him and the winter soldier closed his arms on your body.

"You look like you had fun today." He said behind you.

"I did, Nat was really nice." You smiled as you thought back of your afternoon.

"I'm happy for you." Bucky said before putting a soft kiss against your nape.

"Thank you for asking her to do this with me." You turned around so you could face Bucky before hugging him against you. You kissed him on the jaw before he looked down at you and then your lips met. He ran his hand on your side before bringing it to your head and play with your hair.

"Doll, you drive me crazy." Bucky said against your lips as he stared into your eyes deeply. You blushed as you smiled slightly. For a second you thought back at the conversation you had with Natasha and a question burned at the tip of your tongue.

"Bucky, I-I..." You hesitated, your heart was beating faster than before. "Do you-" You closed your eyes.

"What's wrong?" He asked you with worry. You took a deep breath before sighing.

"No. Nothing, nevermind..." You said with a fake smile. "C'mon, let's nap for a little while." You said as you put your head against his chest. Bucky decided to not argue and he simply put a kiss on your forehead before closing his eyes too.

  
  


You woke up one hour later in Bucky's arms. You felt good, he was warm and made you feel secure. You noticed he was still asleep so you decided to wake him up with soft kisses too like he did to you. You left a trail of kisses from his collarbone, to his neck, to his jaw until you moved on your fours above him and then kissed his face. Bucky opened his eyes and smiled when he saw you drowning him in gentle kisses everywhere on his face.

"Hey." He said to you with a sleepy voice as his hand caressed your arm.

"Hi." You replied between two kisses.

"Please, by all means, don't stop what you're doing to me." He pleaded you. You giggled quietly against his forehead.

"Don't plan to." You teased. Your lips left his face and went to his neck again before reaching his metal shoulder and leaving a few kisses there too. Bucky was so moved by the gesture he suddenly placed his hands on your waist and brought you on top of him. You were now straddling his hips which immediately made you nervous.

Your face was as red as a beet but before you could move or say anything Bucky raised himself up in a sitting position and with you on his lap. He wrapped one arm around your waist and the other gently grabbed your hair before he smashed his mouth against yours. The winter soldier kissed you hungrily, his tongue made its way inside your mouth where he found yours and they danced sensually together. He groaned against your lips as you accidentally moved your hips against his, you could feel his bulge between your legs and you couldn't help a moan escape your lips.

"Doll..." He breathed against your lips. "I-I can't-"

"I-I'm sorry..!" You said as you held his head between your hands and kissed him again. Bucky held your back firmly before switching positions, he was now on top of you while your back hit the mattress and you still had your legs wrapped around his hips. He pulled on your lower lip with his teeth and let go before running his tongue on it. You playfully licked his lips and he smirked before kissing you roughly again. His metal hand gripped your thigh as he kissed you. God, this was bad. You really wanted him but this was not the time. You both couldn't seem to be able to stop though. Thankfully a sudden knock at your door made both you and Bucky stop what you were doing. He sighed in frustration as he let you go and moved to the side. You got up and opened the door.

"Hey- Wow, what happened to you?" Nat asked as she looked at your face.

"W-What do you mean?" You asked in confusion.

"Your hair is all disheveled and-" She dragged her eyes behind you and found Bucky, _again_. "Am I interrupting something?" She asked with a smirk.

"No! No, you weren't. W-We... I, uh." You took a deep breath. "I was sleeping and Bucky is here too. Nothing happened." You said nervously with a smile that you wanted reassuring.

"Anyway-" Nat said as she raised both her eyebrows. "I came to help you prepare for the party but I think I'm gonna come back in- let's say thirty minutes. Alright?"

"Yes, perfect. Thank you very much." She left and you closed the door behind her. "Stop grinning Buck." You glared at him. He let out a low chuckle while he approached you and put a kiss on your temple. "I'm gonna take a shower."

"Do you want help with that?" Bucky winked at you.

"Stop playing around." You said as you rolled your eyes.

"What if I was being serious? We don't have to be naked, you can put on a swimsuit."

"I-I don't even have a swimsuit, Bucky." You stuttered.

"So if you had one you would've accepted?" He raised one eyebrow.

"G-Get out of here." You told him as you blushed. The winter soldier grinned as he came closer to you and put a kiss on your cheek.

"I'll see you at the party, doll." He took your hand and kissed the back of it before leaving your room. You were so in trouble. After Bucky left you took a shower and then wrapped yourself inside a towel. You took your dress from the bag and laid it on your bed while waiting for Nat. Soon enough she finally knocked on your door and you let her in.

  
  


You checked yourself in front of the mirror. You had never looked like this before.

"[Y/N], you're gorgeous." Nat complimented you. God, you really wanted to believe her. But even you had to admit you looked pretty tonight. Nat made your hair along with your makeup, she did a miraculous job. Your hair was straightened but the tips were curly, your eyes were smokey and she put on you a red cherry lipstick. You looked like a whole different person but Nat reassured you it was still you, you just weren't used to this. She helped you put on your dress and zipped up the back. Bucky's pendant he offered you rested perfectly between your cleavage, the neckline really made your breasts pop. You put on your heels and even if at first you felt a little uncomfortable in them you quickly took the hang of walking in them and you released Nat's arm to stand on your own.

"I-I'm so nervous." You confessed to her as you sat on the edge of your bed.

"Don't be. Most of the people who are gonna be at the party have never seen you before so they won't question your new look." She reassured you. "And when our boys will see you their jaw will drop at your sight. You look really pretty."

"T-Thank you." You smiled shyly at her.

"C'mon, it's almost time. Everyone is downstairs already." You got up and she gave you her arm that you took happily. You closed the door behind you and headed to the elevator, Nat was already dressed up when she came to prepare you. You took a deep breath as the elevator doors closed.

 


	13. Birthday party

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 100 kudos already! Thanks to everyone who subscribed to this fic or regularly comes back to read the new chapters!

The elevator doors opened at the floor of the party and-

_Holy shit._

The entire floor was crowded with people, the air was condensed and you were pretty sure the walls shaked against the loud music. Your nervousness upgraded by another level and had it not been for Nat's death grip on your arm you would've taken the elevator back to your floor.

"Smile, it's gonna be fine." She whispered to your ear. She walked out with you following behind her. You saw her wave to a few people you met on your way and you politely smiled at them when they crossed eyes with you.

"Who are all these people?" You asked her discreetly.

"SHIELD agents, Avengers members, some friends... Tony really invited everyone." She said to you as she eyed the crowd, she looked like she was looking for someone. "Oh, look. Nick is there." She walked towards him. "Hey, Fury." She greeted him.

"Agent Romanoff." He bowed his head and then he crossed eyes with you. "[Y/N], happy birthday." He said as he gave you his hand. You shaked it quickly as you slightly smiled at him. You had only met Nick Fury once but you trusted him, he made a good impression on you. "How have you been since you live in the tower?" He asked you.

"Good, it's really nice." You said truthfully.

"Clint! Hey!" Natasha hugged her friend. "[Y/N], I'm sure you know-"

"Hawkeye, yes. Pleased to meet you, I'm [Y/N], uh trainee I guess." You told him as you gave him your hand. He shaked it gently as he smiled at you.

"Yes, I heard. Welcome to the team." He said to you. "Nat, can I offer you a drink?" She smiled at him as she took his arm before walking towards the bar. Oh God, there we go. You were left alone in the middle of a crowd of people you didn't know. You looked around you in hopes to see Bucky or literally anybody you knew but thankfully someone poked your shoulder.

"Y-You?" Your eyed widened.

"Good evening to you too, [Y/N]." Loki ironized.

"What are you doing here?" You asked him.

"Well, I was getting bored in my room and I heard music so I decided to check out what was going on." He paused to look into your eyes. "I can leave if you want me to."

"N-No!" You answered a little bit too quickly which made the God of mischief smirk. You were just thankful there was a familiar face around you. "I-I mean, you can do what you want."

"You seemed a little lost and as a Good Samaritan, I came to your rescue." You rolled your eyes but couldn't help smiling.

"Alright, maybe indeed I was." You said to him truthfully. You were thankful he had indeed helped you.

"By the way, you look ravishing." Loki complimented you. You blushed lightly.

"Thank you." You gave him a small smile. You were both silent for a little while, not knowing what to talk about or say to each other. After all, you both knew you couldn't trust the other. Suddenly Loki handed you his hand and you looked at it before raising your head to look at his face with a confused expression. He rolled his eyes.

"May I?" He asked you.

"May you what?" You asked him. He gestured you to look around, the music had changed and people around you were dancing together.

"So, may I have this dance?" The Asgardian asked you again.

"O-Oh... I-I'm afraid I don't do...this." You replied nervously.

"What? Dancing? Don't tell me you don't know how to." He said with a low chuckle. You stayed silent and he suddenly looked at you with seriousness. "You really don't know, do you?" Loki asked you.

"I-I've never danced before or even just... all this. Attending parties and stuff." You confessed as you lowered your head. You didn't even know why you were telling Loki out of all people this thing about you.

"Interesting..." He said. "Well, would you try to have your first dance with me?" He asked you as he re handed you his hand. You took a deep breath before finally agreeing. After all, why the hell not? Everyone around you was dancing and Bucky was nowhere in sight, had it not been for the God of mischief hanging out with you at this party you would've left.

"Fine." You said as you took his hand. Loki guided you to the dance floor then he put his hand on the lower part of your back while the other one held one of your hands.

"Put your other hand on my shoulder." He ordered you discreetly. "Look around you and check how the other women are doing." You did as he said, you were thankful he was actually being nice and patient with you. "Alright, now follow my lead." He grinned at you and you could swear your heart missed a beat. This was actually easy, you didn't stomp on his feet once and you were really starting to have fun. You smiled at him as you kept dancing, ignoring everyone around you. The nervousness disappeard as you stared into the God of mischief's eyes.

"This is actually nice." You started. "Thank you." Loki smiled back at you.

"Would you like to try something else?" He asked you.

"You're scaring me now." You said.

"You don't have to be." He took a few steps back but kept holding your hand then he twisted his arm and made you twirl on yourself before catching you back against him. You let out a little giggle before realizing what you were doing. Your hands were against his chest and Loki had his arms wrapped around your body, you blushed more as you raised your head and stared at him. When you turned your head to avoid staring at him longer you crossed eyes with Steve and immediately took a step back from Loki.

"I-I'm sorry!" You blurted out to the Asgardian before walking quickly towards the captain. "Steve, I-I swear it's not what it looks like!" You tried to defend yourself as you panicked.

"[Y/N], it's fine." He said as he stared into your eyes. "Just be careful." Steve warned you before looking towards where you left Loki. He was gone.

"W-Where is Bucky? I didn't see him at all." You changed the subject.

"He was here earlier, he told me he was going to get a drink." Steve said to you.

"Okay, I'm gonna try to look for him." You walked away from the super soldier and paused to breathe deeply to calm your panic. What the hell were you doing?? You hadn't realized how much of a bad idea it was to dance with Loki in the middle of a crowd who all either wanted him dead or imprisoned for the rest of his life. And now a thought was scaring you. What if Bucky saw you having fun with the God of mischief? You really needed to find him to erase any suspicions. Unfortunately before you could reach the bar Pepper put a hand on your shoulder.

"[Y/N], come with me." She said to you. You had no choice but to follow her now, hopefully you'd find Bucky later. She guided you to a stage where the band was playing music. Uh oh, this sounded bad.

"Everyone, may I have your attention?" You recognized Tony's voice. He was speaking into a microphone to the crowd. Oh, God. You were standing between him and Pepper on the stage, all the eyes were on you and you never wanted to disappear this badly before. "First of all, I'd like to introduce you all to the birthday girl _and_... new Avengers member." What?? Everyone started clapping and as Tony was smiling at you, you decided to smile back to show you absolutely weren't on the verge of a panic attack.

"What is going on?" You asked discreetly to Pepper.

"Just smile, it's gonna be over soon." She said to you through gritted teeth. She was, out of all people, the most used to Tony's taste for extravagant shows.

"[Y/N], I have a birthday gift for you." He said to you. Your eyes widened.

"Tony, you really shouldn't have..." You started but he raised his hand to silence you.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. activate [Y/N]'s birthday gift." Activate- wait, what? Suddenly you heard loud stomps behind the stage where you stood with the Stark couple. You turned around to check what it was and your jaw dropped. The crowd cheered behind you but you couldn't hear it as you were shook about what you were seeing.

"Oh my god!" You brought your hands to your mouth, this couldn't be real. It was a huge iron suit and you noticed Tony made it in your favorite color. You stared at the suit then at Tony and Pepper in disbelief. "Y-You're crazy!" You let out. Tony chuckled lightly.

"I'm glad you love it." Okay, if you were being totally honest here the suit actually looked really cool. "I know it's not Thor's hammer but I'm sure it will be very useful to you." He teased with a wink.

"Haha, very funny Tony." You knew he referenced the truth or dare game you had a few weeks ago. You relaxed a little and took a few steps towards Tony to hug him. "Thank you, I really love it." You said with a smile.

"We'll deal with the basics, theory, training and everything another day. Now go back to your party, have fun." He said to you before pulling Pepper away. When you walked down the stage Fury approached you.

"I can't believe he did it. I told him not to." He shaked his head.

"You knew?" You asked him.

"We did discuss about your security on the battlefield if that day had to come but I told him to wait. As always, Tony does what he wants." You smiled lightly. Nick Fury left and someone else came to talk to you.

"Hey, [Y/N] right?" A man smiled at you before offering you his hand to shake it. "I'm Scott, Scott Lang. Ant-man. You probably heard of m- judging by your face you don't..." He looked disappointed.

"I-I'm sorry, I don't know all the members but it's nice to meet you Scott. Yes, I'm [Y/N]." You smiled at him as you shaked his hand politely.

"Your new suit looks so cool, God, I wish that were me." He looked lost in his thoughts. Suddenly you rememberd Bucky.

"I'm sorry, I have to find someone Scott." You told him before walking away. You tried to go through the crowd to reach the bar and when you finally made it you saw that Bucky was nowhere in sight. You sulked. You wondered if he was even at the party, if he saw you on the stage he would've joined you no? So where was he?

"Can I offer you a drink?" You heard someone speak to you. You turned your head and saw Thor smile at you.

"Oh, hey Thor. Sure..." The Asgardian spoke to the bartender and then rested his forearms on the counter before turning to you.

"I saw you with my brother earlier." He said. Your heart ached.

"Listen, if you're going to give me a lesson too-"

"What? No, not at all." He pushed your glass to you after the bartender placed your drinks in front of the God of thunder. "I know my brother the most among everyone here. I know he doesn't plan on attacking you." Thor took a sip of his drink. "He's playing around, it's what he does. For now, I'm sure he's just interested in finding what we're hiding from him." He said to you. "When I say don't trust my brother, I mean don't give him your secrets. Loki only serves himself. It didn't mean you can't become his friend." You raised your eyebrows.

"I-I don't plan on-"

"I'm just saying. Loki can be surprising sometimes." He paused. "I'm gonna tell you a secret..." You looked him in the eyes. "There's no one else I trust more than my brother." Your eyes widened.

"But you said-" You started.

"Yes, don't trust him. When I tell him to stay at one place or not steal something he doesn't do it but everytime I really needed him, Loki was there." Thor smiled at you.

"Why are you telling me all this?" You asked him.

"I felt like it. I think you're the only person here who is actually willing on giving him a chance at redemption." You smiled slightly as you lowered your head.

"Yeah, I think that's true. He was nice with me earlier." Thor put a hand on your naked shoulder and smiled at you before taking another sip of his drink. You did the same.

"Hey, what are you both doing?" Bruce appeard between you and the God of thunder. You wanted to keep this conversation with Thor to yourself so you changed subjects.

"I was looking for Bucky and Thor gently offered me a drink. By the way, have you seen him?" You asked the doctor.

"I think he came with Steve at the beginning but I haven't seen him since." He said to you. "Congrats for officially becoming an Avengers by the way." He cheered.

"Thank you, Bruce." You smiled at him.

"Also, I forgot to tell you but you look very beautiful." Thor said to you. You blushed slightly.

"Thank you. Well, I think I'm gonna look again. Have fun you both." You waved at them and left the bar.

  
  


\---

  
  


Your feet were hurting, you had looked all night for Bucky but he was nowhere in sight. This couldn't seem possible, where was he?? You re-asked the Avengers members you knew and they all told you they hadn't seen him so you gathered some courage and started asking people you didn't know too. One woman had told you that her friend wanted to speak with the winter soldier and since then she had disappeard too. You had a bad feeling about this. You thanked her and left.

It was super late and a lot of people had gone home already, it made you sad that you didn't spend your first birthday party with Bucky. He was the person you were the closest to in the tower, you really would've wanted to have fun with him. You walked to the elevator to retreat to your room but it was busy so you decided to take the stairs instead. You sat on one step of the stairs and took off your heels before climbing up.

When you reached a floor you thought you had recognized Bucky's laugh. So it that where he was the whole time?? You walked in the hallway with your heels dandling in one hand and you could now hear a little more clearly.

"Buck-" Your voice got stuck inside your throat. Your eyes widened at the sight in front of you. You were going to be sick. In the corner of the end of the hallway you had recognized his form. Bucky was pushing a woman against the wall and his mouth was on hers. When he heard someone call him he turned around and then he crossed eyes with you, his eyes widened just like yours.

"[Y/N]?" No doll, just your name. Your vision blurred immediately when you saw his face, you had hoped it wasn't him, you would've given anything to be wrong. You dropped your heels on the floor and ran in the opposite direction. "Wait!" You heard him yell. You ran fast like never before, you wanted to escape so badly you almost fell down the stairs but thankfully catched yourself on the side. Realization hit you as you sobbed and climbed quickly. Bucky missed your birthday party because he was playing around with another woman. You felt so stupid.

"I'm such an idiot!" You spat out angrily as you sniffled and wiped your tears with the back of your hands. You had finally reached your floor and before you could grab your doorknob a cold hand closed on your arm.

"D-Doll, listen to m-" You turned around when you recognized his voice, you hit his arm with the one he grabbed you with but just ended up hurting yourself as it was his metal one.

"Let me go!" You screamed at him. Your heart ached so badly, more tears blinded your vision.

"P-Please-" He tried pleading you but you were firm. You had heard enough, _seen enough_. You just wanted to be alone.

"I never want to see you again!" You yelled at him and he finally released you. You grabbed your doorknob and slammed the door shut behind you. "F.R.I.D.A.Y. don't let anyone come in, I don't want to be bothered." You ordered the AI as you cried.

Bucky had ruined everything.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Shoutout to the person who commented in the last chapter "I can't wait for Bucky to see reader at the party."


	14. Movie night

You gripped your necklace and threw it on the floor before dropping face first on your bed. You grabbed your pillow and cried hard against it. You couldn't believe it. Everything hurt so much. How could he have played with you like that? How could you be so stupid? You really believed Bucky had something for you, you really believed him when he used to tell you you were the best thing that's happened to him so why? Why did he betray you like this? And why did he have to do it today? You don't mean just on your birthday but you also thought back about the nap you took earlier in his arms. You had almost let him _touch_ you. You felt stings in your chest, the pain was immeasurable. You knew you would never trust someone ever again.

You heard knocks on your door as you cried but you ignored it all, you didn't care who was behind the door. You didn't want to see anybody and especially not Bucky. You got up and walked to your bathroom. You felt even more stupid as you stared at yourself in the mirror. You wanted to get rid of your clothes, your makeup that was ruined on your face and your hairstyle. You took off the dress and your underwear and sat in your bathtub. You let the water run and fill the tub while you continued crying.

You washed the hair spray off your hair, the makeup off your face and the perfume off your body. You didn't want to keep any trace of the party on you. You massaged your aching feet, thinking back of how you made a fool out of yourself as you asked everybody where Bucky was. You would've never imagined he was busy with a woman on your birthday after making you believe for days he cared about you. You couldn't believe that out of all the people, the only person who actually made you have fun at _your birthday party_ was the God of mischief, Loki. You held back a dry chuckle as you thought back about how Bucky told you to not approach and trust the Asgardian.

You got out of the bath after the tip of your fingers turned wrinkly, you had spent too much time in the water. You put on your pyjamas and hid yourself under your covers. You grabbed your phone and put on your earbuds, the knocking on your door hadn't stopped. You couldn't care less if the winter soldier was gonna stay up all night at your door. He wasn't your problem anymore.

  
  


You woke up when the rays of sunshine shined on your face and almost blinded you when you opened your eyes. You checked the time. 12pm. You had nothing to do that you were aware of anyway so you stayed in bed. You didn't want to greet anyone and especially not Bucky. After spending one hour in bed wasting time on your phone your stomach had unfortunately started growling. You really regretted that you didn't keep food in your room, you would've stayed there all day. You quickly put on your clothes after leaving the bathroom and walked towards your door. You could do this, you were just going to grab something to eat in the kitchen and then climb back up on your bed.

You opened the door and then you heard a thud. You lowered your head and found Bucky leaning against your door. It looked like he was sleeping. You got around and avoided stepping into him then headed to the elevator. You didn't bother closing the door of your room, you didn't want him to wake up and talk to you.

You arrived to the floor that lead to the kitchen and thankfully no one was there. You made a sandwich in hurry that you put on a plate and took it with you along with a water bottle and grabbed a package of cookies in case you got hungry later so you wouldn't have to come down again. You walked quickly to the elevator and made it back to your floor. Problem, Bucky was gone when the elevator doors opened. You took a deep breath before walking past his room to join yours but oh, no, that would've been too easy. When you entered your room he was there waiting for you.

"Get out." You told him in a harsh tone as you put down the food you carried on the desk.

"No." He replied.

"Fine, I'll go somewhere else then." You said as you were about to walk out again. But Bucky approached you and before he could touch you you glared at him. "Don't you dare." All the warmth, kindness and love that you usually reserved for him were gone from your eyes. Bucky felt his chest ache.

"Please, listen to me..." He begged you.

"I never want to speak with you ever again." You felt tears coming back again as you thought of the party. "I-I can't believe you've done this."

"Doll, I-"

"No!" You interrupted him. "Don't ever call me that." He came closer to you and tried to put his hand on your arm but you slapped it away. "Get out of my room." He paused before speaking again.

"I saw you with Loki." Your eyes widened when he brought this up.

"So you thought what? Getting revenge and hurting me by kissing another woman because I danced with him?" You let out a dry chuckle. "Well, congratulations. It fucking worked." You spat out. You walked towards your bed and bent down to pick up the necklace he offered you. You shoved it against his chest. "Take it back and give it to her. Get out, I won't say it again." You gave the winter soldier your back, you didn't want to cry in front of him again. Bucky stayed silent for a little while but finally stepped out of your room. You broke down in tears when the door closed.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Miss, you are requested downstairs." F.R.I.D.A.Y. announced you.

"By whom?" You asked.

"Mr. Stark." You sighed deeply. It was 7pm now. You had stayed in your room all day and no one else had come to knock at your door. This must've been important if he asked the AI to warn you so you decided to go.

They were all in the living space, the Avengers members you were living with but also Loki which surprised you. Maybe since he was behaving correctly they let him wander around the tower. And then you spotted him too, Bucky. He was looking at you but you decided to ignore him.

"Hey." Steve said to you. "We haven't seen you today."

"Guess I'm not used to parties, I was tired and needed rest." A lie but you didn't care. You weren't going to spill your problems to everyone in the room.

"Anyway-" Tony interrupted. "Now that everyone is here I have to announce you of the next mission." You had a bad feeling. "[Y/N], your first official one." Great.

"Okay." You said.

"You'll be going with Steve." Oh, thanks God. "And Bucky." Fuck. This was great, fantastic. Just what you needed. "And a few SHIELD agents. The mission is to grab a few classified files. They already know about it and you don't have to worry about that since you won't be on the battlefield."

"Okay." You repeated.

"Right. So, tomorrow morning. Be ready." He said. "Oh and if you're not busy right now come with me, I'll show you how to use the suit, just in case."

"Yeah, let's go." You got up from your seat and followed Tony to his lab.

"Is it me or-" Nat started after you left. "Something seemed wrong?" Steve shrugged. Bucky got up and left without saying anything. Steve and Nat crossed eyes before they both got up too and followed the winter soldier.

"Buck! Hey, did something happen?" Steve said after he catched Bucky in the hallway. Bucky stayed silent.

"What happened?" Nat asked. They guided him to an empty room to talk in peace. Bucky sat down on a chair and sighed deeply before replying.

"I fucked up." He finally let out.

"What do you mean?" Steve asked.

"I-I..." He paused. "I kissed a women at the party and do- [Y/N]... she saw me."

"You what??" Nat's eyes widened.

"Wait, start from the beginning." Steve said as he and Nat grabbed a chair each and sat on it. Bucky took a deep breath.

"When I told you I was going to get a drink, I was at the bar and then I turned my head and I saw her... She looked so beautiful, she was stunning..." He paused, he was lost in his thoughts with a little smile on his face before coming back to himself. "But she wasn't alone. Loki was with her. I thought he was up to something so I was about to walk in on them but I saw her smile and laugh with him. It drove me crazy."

"She was with Loki?" Nat asked.

"Yeah, I saw them too." Steve said.

"He offered her his hand and she accepted it. I saw them dance and she looked like she had fun the whole time. I couldn't stand the sight anymore. I was about to go break his jaw anyway but then this woman came to me. An agent she told me. She was flirting with me I could tell." He sighed. "I was going to reject her but then I looked back at [Y/N] and she was even closer to Loki. I don't understand what happened. Next thing I know I let the woman drag me to another floor of the tower. I let her since I didn't want to see them dancing together anymore. We spoke for some time until-" Bucky passed his flesh hand on his face. "All I had in mind was her, my doll, looking as pretty as ever in another man's arms and smiling at him like she smiles at me. I was lost in my thoughts and the agent took that opportunity to kiss me. When I turned around she was there..." Bucky had tears in the corner of his eyes. "I'll never forget her expression, Steve. She will never forgive me."

"Don't say that." Steve said as he put a hand on his best friend's shoulder.

"No, it's too late. Remember when you told me all she needed was to let go to be ready to be with me? I think that just before the party she was. She was ready to be with me." A tear streamed down his cheek. "I ruined everything."

"We'll talk to her, I'm sure we can fix things." Nat tried to reassure him.

"We got the mission tomorrow, I'm sure we can find a moment for you both to be alone and speak things out. C'mon, get up. It's not too late." The captain added.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Give me your wrist." Tony said. "I'll put this here." He fixed a type of iron wristband around your wrist. "When you click this button on the side, it will activate the suit. Don't worry about not knowing how to control it, F.R.I.D.A.Y. will guide you the whole time. It's mostly designed for defense, you won't fight with this on."

"Alright." You said to him as you looked at the object on your wrist.

"And remember, it's only for emergencies. In case you get separated from your team or if you get captured by the enemy. If someone tries to forcefully take it off it will activate too. You're a member that we can't afford to lose so the suit will do everything to put you back to safety."

"Okay."

"[Y/N], that means you can't use it if someone is in danger. If you activate the suit it will take you away. If you happen to be somewhere where a crisis is happening simply talk to F.R.I.D.A.Y. and she will alert the SHIELD and the tower."

"Alright, I think I got it. Thanks again, Tony." You smiled at him as you lowered your arm.

"No problem, kid." He smiled back at you. "By the way, are you okay? You didn't look too good earlier." Tony worried.

"Yeah, don't worry about that. Something indeed happened but it's nothing you need to be concerned about, I'll be fine." You told him.

"Alright, I won't force you to talk to me but I want you to know my door is always open if you need me." You smiled a bit sadly.

"Thank you, for everything you did for me since I came here. I really appreciate it." You felt tears coming so you hugged him before he could look at your face. He gently patted your back.

"C'mon, let's go back. It's getting dark." You followed him inside.

  
  


"So, what do you guys feel like doing tonight?" Nat asked as you were all brought back to the living space.

"Can we do something a bit relaxing this time? Watch a movie?" Bruce suggested. You shrugged.

"I'm in." You said to him.

"I'm okay with it too." Steve and Tony said.

"Alright. What genre are we watching?" Nat asked.

"Horror." You let out a bit too quickly. You had no need for romance or comedy at the moment.

"Hahaha, I like the sound of that." Thor said.

"How about comedy?" Bruce asked.

"Let's vote." Steve smiled. "Who wants horror? Raise you arms." You along with Thor, Nat and Loki, to your surprise, raised your arms. You crossed eyes with the God of mischief and he smirked at you.

"And comedy?" Bruce, Tony and Steve raised their arms this time.

"Well, I think that settles it." Tony said.

"Wait, Bucky you didn't vote." Nat said to him. "You either tie the vote or we go with horror." You avoided his gaze and acted as if he wasn't in the room.

"Horror." The winter soldier let out. You raised your head. He turned his head towards you and you crossed eyes with him but immediately looked away again.

"Alright. Let's meet up in twenty minutes in the movie room? Time for everyone to go to the bathroom or grab snacks." Nat said as she got up. Everyone did the same.

"You surprise me everyday a little more." Loki said as he came next to you.

"What? You thought I would be into romantic movies?" You rolled your eyes. He shrugged.

"You're right, I shouldn't make assumptions. After all, I do know _nothing_ about you."

"Nice try, Loki." You smiled as you understood he was still fishing for your secret. "Anyway, I'm gonna change before the movie." And you left him there as you walked out.

  
  


You asked F.R.I.D.A.Y. to guide you to the movie room since you had no idea where it was. When you finally reached it you saw that almost everybody was already settled in the seats. You liked the place, it looked like a small cinema theater, it really gave a nice vibe. You noticed there was an empty space next to Thor on the couch so you decided to sit next to him.

"That's my seat." Someone said to you after you settled on it. You raised your head to meet the God of mischief's eyes, of course.

"I like her company better." Thor said to his brother with a smile. You smiled before moving a bit closer to the God of thunder.

"C'mon, we can fit all three of us on that couch." You told Loki. "I'll let you sit next to me if you share those cookies." You eyed the snack he was holding. He handed you the package and sat next to you.

"Don't you dare snuggle up next to me if you get scared." Loki told you.

"As if you'd hate that." You said a little bit too quickly. You regretted it immediately.

"Try me." He teased. You rolled your eyes and faced forward.

"What are we watching anyway?"

"Annabelle." Nat replied as she walked into the room with Bucky. You saw him stare at you and he looked like he wanted to say something but you reported your attention to the Asgardians sitting next to you so he walked to his seat and sat on the same couch as Steve and Nat.

"Alright, everyone ready?" Tony asked. He was sitting on another couch with Bruce. "F.R.I.D.A.Y. we can start." Suddenly the lights turned off and the movie began.

  
  


"I-Is it over yet??" You asked Loki as you covered your eyes.

"Yeah, it's gone." Loki replied. You removed your hands to stare at the screen and suddenly you let out a scream along with Thor who got startled by your reaction. Loki burst out laughing next to you both.

"Ugh, you lied!" You said angrily but discreetly to not bother the others.

"You said it yourself, I can't be trusted." He teased.

"Ha ha, you're hilarious." You rolled your eyes. Okay, maybe you deserved that one. You had been watching the movie for one hour now, Loki wondered why you wanted to watch a horror movie since you acted so badly to them. Everytime you felt a jumpscare coming you hid your face against your hands or _him_.

"You're amusing, _cookie_." He said to you. Your eyes widened.

"W-What did you call me?" You asked as you blushed. Oh, God, this was bad. What was happening? The God of mischief didn't reply, he simply took a cookie from the package that rested on your lap and ate it while looking into your eyes before bringing his attention back to the movie. You decided to ignore it and reported your attention back to the movie too.

  
  


"Stop glaring at them so much, even I can feel my back burning, Bucky." Nat said discreetly to the winter soldier who didn't miss any of your interactions with Loki.

"He doesn't deserve to talk with her, he doesn't even deserve to have her smile at him." Bucky muttered.

"You know if I didn't pity you so much right now I'd almost find you adorable." Nat teased.

"It should be me protecting her, he's not even reassuring her he's just making fun of her." Bucky continued. Nat elbowed Steve so he could say something to his best friend.

"Buck, chill." The winter soldier hadn't brought his gaze to the screen once, he was focused on you. "Tomorrow during the mission you'll get to talk to [Y/N]." Steve tried reassuring him.

"What the fuck does he think he's doing?" Bucky watched Loki put his arm around your shoulders.

"Calm down Bucky, the sun's getting real low." Nat said as she put her hand on the winter's soldier forearm. He turned his head to look at her with a confused expression.

"Tell me you didn't just try _that_ on me." She couldn't help a low chuckle escape her lips.

"What? It works for him." She pointed towards Bruce. Bucky ignored her and reported his attention back to you.

You yawned as you leaned on Loki's side, this was a long day and filled with emotions. And tomorrow will probably be even more tiring. Hopefully the movie was gonna end soon and you wouldn't get nightmares because of it.

"Cookie, are you sleepy?" He asked you in a low voice to not disturb the others. You nodded. "You can sleep if you want, I'll bring you to your room when it's over."

"How are you gonna do that?" You asked as you raised one eyebrow.

"I think I've been too friendly with you lately. Did you forget who you're speaking to?" Loki said with a smirk.

"Oh, excuse me God of mischief, a mere mortal like me meant no offense your highness." You joked. You saw him hold back a laugh.

"To answer your question." He said back seriously. "I can teleport you to your room."

"That seems a bit dangerous." You said.

"Oh for you? Probably. For me, not at all." You playfully hit him on the arm. "You can sleep, I promise you you will wake up on your bed in one piece."

"I don't know, you can't be trusted." You teased again. He pinched your nose and you whined.

"Fine, you can just sleep on this couch I guess. We will leave you here alone and maybe Annabelle will visit you during the night." The Asgardian said as he faced forward.

"You're so mean actually. Whatever I'm not sleepy anymore." You lied, you just didn't want to risk falling asleep in the room and be left there. Loki chuckled next to you. "Oh thanks God, it's finally over." You said as you saw the credits roll. You all got up from your seats and stretched your numb muscles.

"Well, this was fun." Loki said to you.

"Yes, I agree." Your day had started very badly you were thankful you got to think about something else than Bucky today.

"Well, goodnight everybody." Tony said before walking out of the room. Bruce followed behind him.

"You look like you had fun." Thor said to his brother.

"The movie was entertaining, indeed." He replied.

"I didn't mean the movie." The God of thunder grinned.

"Then I don't see what you mean." Loki rolled his eyes. You didn't pay attention to the Asgardian's conversation as you spoke with Nat about the scariest parts of the movie. Behind her you could see Steve talking to Bucky but he had his eyes fixed on you. You ignored his gaze though.

"I wish you all goodnight too. [Y/N], Bucky, I suggest you both go to sleep now, we got a mission tomorrow." Steve reminded you.

"Yes, dad." You replied to him playfully.

"Don't make me send you to your room, young girl." Steve replied with a smile.

"Goodnight, guys." You told them before walking towards the elevator. Before you could escape Loki seized your wrist but let go as he realized what he did.

"I-I just wanted to say goodnight." He stuttered to your surprise. You smiled at him before you decided to hug him. "Sweet dreams, cookie."

"Thanks, you too." You said before going. Thor stared at his brother with a smirk before Loki noticed him.

"Shut up." He told him.

As you walked towards the elevator you noticed someone was walking behind you. Bucky of course. You did live on the same floor after all. You both walked into the elevator when the doors opened. During the lift you were both silent, you weren't looking at him but you know he was looking at you, you could feel his gaze burning you.

"[Y/N]..." He called you by your name. You did tell him you didn't want to hear the surname.

"No, Bucky. I'm not doing this right now. I just want to sleep." You stopped him.

"Please..." He spoke lowly and softly as if he was drained of all energy. "I-I just miss you so much-"

"No!" You interrupted him again. "I-I don't want to hear it." You could feel you were about to cry.

"I-I don't know what to do, I want back what we had before the party..." His voice broke, you didn't look at him but you knew he was crying too. You heard him slowly approach you and you hated it.

"P-Please leave me alone." You pleaded him as you cried.

"I'm sorry for making you cry, I'm sorry for everything, doll." He put his hands against your face and wiped your tears. Bucky kissed your forehead and held you against his chest as you both cried in the elevator. Thankfully the doors finally opened, you escaped his arms and ran to your room. He didn't try to hold you back or stop you, he let you go and dragged himself to his own room.

 


	15. First mission

After you had spend a long time crying on your bed sleep had finally consumed you. You woke up feeling like shit honestly. The scene in the elevator with Bucky kept replaying in your head all night. You didn't want to see him, you didn't want to go on a mission with him, you didn't want to interact at all with him. It was very early and honestly you wouldn't have said no to a few more hours of sleep. You dragged yourself to the bathroom and decided to take a cold shower to wake yourself up. You prepared your clothes and your backpack before going down to have breakfast. Thankfully the hallway was empty when you got out of your room alas you had less luck when you arrived in the kitchen. Steve and Bucky were already there. You took a deep breath.

"Good morning." You said to both of them because you were polite

"Hey, [Y/N]." Steve said to you with a smile as always. The captain nudged the winter soldier who stayed silent.

"Hi." Bucky finally said, he looked uncomfortable though. You walked past them and poured yourself a bowl of cereal before taking a seat around the table. You started digging into your breakfast in this dreadful ambience. Everyone was silent and didn't dare to speak.

"So..." Steve started. "How are you feeling for your first real mission?" He asked. You shrugged. Okay, we were going to have a blast Steve thought. Bucky glanced in your direction sometimes but you didn't dare lift your head from your bowl of cereal. There was no way you were going to let him cause a scene like yesterday night in the elevator. "I have a few more things to prepare, I'll catch you both soon." Steve said as he got up, he eyed Bucky to encourage him to finally speak with you. You had seen clear in his game though, you knew he left you alone with Bucky on purpose.

"[Y/N]-"

"If you're gonna talk about the party again, I'm not interested and now is not the time." You said coldly.

"When is it the time then?" He asked you.

"I don't know." You replied.

"Tell me what I can do to erase this." He said to you. "Look at me, please." You raised your head and you were met with his sad and tortured expression, the one you couldn't stand seeing on his face.

"You're the only person I ever trusted Bucky and you betrayed me. I don't know how this can be fixed!" You said louder than you intended to. You got up and put your bowl in the sink before walking out of the room. Steve crossed you in the hallway as you were walking out, you had tears in your eyes again.

"Hey, are you okay?" He said as he gently took your arm.

"No!" You yelled and ran away from him.

"What happened?" Steve asked Bucky as he came back in the kitchen. "She was crying." Bucky held his head between his hands.

"I told you, it's over. She's never going to forgive me." Bucky sulked.

  
  


You were on your way to the SHIELD's headquarters with Steve and Bucky in a car. You had to meet there to join the agents who were assigned to this mission too. During the car ride none of you spoke after what happened in the kitchen. You could tell everyone was a bit on edge but especially you. If one of them dared to bring back the conversation you were ready to throw yourself out of the car just to avoid it. At least Bucky was relieved this time he could be with you and even if you didn't want to speak with him he would do anything to reassure and protect you.

"Alright, here we are." Steve said. You got out of the car and followed the two super soldiers.

"Hey, Steve." Maria Hill greeted him. "Bucky, [Y/N]." She crossed eyes with you both. You made a small waving movement at her with your hand. She guided you three through the hangar and stopped in front of a small plane. "Fury must've explained the mission to you already. The agents are inside. Good luck." And she left you there. You examined the plane, boy were you nervous. Bucky looked at you curiously.

"First time?" You heard him ask.

"Is it that obvious?" You replied.

"Don't be scared, it's gonna be fine."

"I'm not." You lied. And he knew you did, he smiled slightly. You three climbed into the plane and greeted the SHIELD agents.

"Hey, you must be the medic." One of them said to you.

"Might as well make it my official name I guess." You rolled your eyes.

"Sorry. I already know Captain America and the winter soldier. We only heard about you."

"I'm [Y/N]." You said. "Sorry, I don't mean to seem cold. It's my first mission and my first time on a plane." You explained yourself.

"Oh, understandable, don't worry. Well, I hope this turns out well." You nodded. After that you were assigned a seat and you took place on it. You put on your seatbelt and hoped for the best. You saw Bucky take place next to you and you hoped to God he wasn't going to start again.

"Alright, let's take off. You all know what you have to do." Steve said. You were getting stressed to be honest, you were thankful you actually weren't going to be on the battlefield. All you had to do was wait in the plane for injured and wounded members.

Suddenly the plane took off and you closed your eyes. You felt the whole thing shake and you wondered if that was normal. You opened your eyes when you felt someone grab your hand. You turned your head and saw it was Bucky. You turned your head the other way but kept holding his hand. The gesture warmed your chest but still you were not ready to speak to him and as gentle as his attention was it didn't erase everything. You unconsciously squeezed his hand when the plane shuddered as it entered some turbulence though. You really hoped you were going to land soon enough. You didn't like this first experience.

Thankfully, someone out there heard your pleas and you finally landed. Bucky let go of your hand, you immediately missed his warmth and the feeling of security he procured you.

"[Y/N], you stay here with the pilot. The others, follow me outside." Steve ordered everyone. The winter soldier crossed eyes with you before walking out and this time you didn't avoid his gaze.

  
  


\---

  
  


You and the pilot raised your heads on alert when you heard a huge crash. It sounded like a big explosion. What the hell happened out there?! Your heart started beating fast against your chest, you started worrying for your teammates but especially for Bucky. You had landed on a deserted field and the enemy's headquarters were underground. If a bomb exploded under the ground there could be a risk that everyone was now buried with no chance to get out.

"Where are they?!" You asked in panic to the pilot.

"I don't know I don't see anyone out there." He replied. You were both facing forward and looking out through the glass of the front of the plane.

"Fuck! What should we do?"

"First of all calm down, trust them okay? It's not their first dangerous mission." He reassured you. He was right though, you were panicking and you knew how much panic lead to bad decisions. "I think I see something over there." You immediately turned your head to where he was pointing. You squinted your eyes and recognized a car, it was driving towards your location. "Look carefully, it might be the enemy. And if it is we're taking off."

"What? Without the others?" You asked.

"I have orders [Y/N]. I can't let them take you." You eyed the iron wristband you wore on your wrist. You couldn't do this. Tony warned you, it's not for rescuing others.

"Wait I think I recognize the agent I spoke to." You told the pilot.

"It might be a trap, wait until we see everybody else in the car." He advised you.

"It's them! I see Steve!" You cheered. You dropped yourself on the co-pilot seat and breathed deeply with relief.

"Alright, I'm opening the door. Help them, they might be wounded." The pilot clicked on a button on the dashboard and the door in the back of the plane opened. You jumped out of the seat and ran to the back. The members left the car and ran towards the plane. Thanks God you saw that all of them were there.

"C'mon!" Steve hurried everyone to get into the plane. An agent made it first and he was carrying a case, probably those documents the mission was for. The others followed and then Steve helped Bucky get inside too. Wait, why did he need help?

"What happened??" You asked Steve as you helped him carry Bucky on a seat.

"Not now, [Y/N]."

"Everyone here?" The pilot asked loudly from the front.

"Yes, let's go!" Steve ordered the pilot. You looked at Bucky's face, he looked in pain and couldn't even keep his eyes open.

"Bucky, stay with me!" You ordered him. You checked his body and saw he had blood coming out of his flesh shoulder but also on the side of his torso. You kneeled in front of him and at the moment you were about to touch him the plane took off and you glided to the side with a little shriek.

"Steve help me, keep Bucky still." You grabbed Bucky's seatbelt and instead of attaching it to him you put it around you so with the plane movements you wouldn't slide again. Steve catched himself on Bucky's seat with one arm and the other was around his best friend's shoulders. You unbuttoned Bucky's jacket and took it off carefully. His shirt was bloody on the shoulder and the side of the torso. You eyed Steve for explanation.

"They shot at us." The captain said. You wondered why out of everyone it was Bucky, the winter fucking soldier, who got shot. I mean, he was a super soldier and extremely skilled too so how could everyone dodge a bullet but not him? You had no time to think about that though.

"You!" You pointed to an agent. "Hand me that bag next to you." The agent threw you your backpack and you quickly unzipped it to get what you needed. You grabbed a pocket knife and then cut through Bucky's shirt with it. You dropped the bloody fabric to your knees and then examinated Bucky's skin. You could see clearly now. He had two bullet wounds and he was losing blood. You looked into Bucky's eyes. "You're gonna be fine." You reassured him

"I know-" He started as he panted. "I trust you, doll..." Your heart missed a beat.

"I'm gonna start with your shoulder, you're not missing another arm today." You placed your palms on the wound and closed your eyes. You could see the wound in your mind, you needed to focus to pull the bullet out. You could hear Bucky whimper quietly as you healed him, then you felt something hard poke at your palm. You opened your eyes and pulled the bullet with your fingers. You dropped it on the ground and placed your palm on his shoulder again to close the wound. Ten seconds later his shoulder showed no sigh of any injury. It was like new.

"Incredible..." You heard an agent comment behind you.

"Your powers are really miraculous [Y/N]." Steve said to you as he watched you heal Bucky. You said nothing as you were not done yet. You placed your hand on the winter soldier's side.

"Feel free to touch as much as you'd like." You heard Bucky joke above you.

"Shut up, Bucky." He smiled tenderly as he looked at you. He really missed this. You closed your eyes and let your powers flow through you. Suddenly the plane went through another turbulence and you were propelled against him. You catched yourself by putting your hand against his naked torso. "S-Sorry." You stuttered as you removed your hand.

"No harm done, doll." He grinned. You rolled your eyes.

"I-I'm almost done." You placed your hand back on his side and closed your eyes to focus and visualize the wound. Soon enough you pulled another bullet and then you closed his wound. When you were done you took a deep breath. You checked him for other injuries but as far as you could see he had none. "Are you hurt somewhere else?" You asked him.

"Not physically..." Bucky replied as he looked into your eyes. You bit onto your lower lip as you lowered your head. You took off the seatbelt and got up but as soon as you did you felt dizzy, Bucky saw you waver and before you fell he catched you on his lap. "Are you okay?" He worried.

"Y-Yeah... Sorry, it happens sometimes. Healing drains my energy." You explained. You blushed as you realized you were sitting on him, you wanted to get up but he kept you against him.

"I'll let you get up once we land, it's too dangerous." You sighed but you were too tired to argue with him. "Thank you for healing me." He smiled at you.

"'S my job." You replied as you looked away from his face. "By the way, how did you get shot? I mean... No offense but you're a super soldier and probably more skilled than all these agents reunited and you got shot... _Twice_." You asked with furrowed brows. He sighed before replying.

"My mind's away, doll. I can't stop thinking about y-" You raised your hand to silence him. Of course, you should've seen this coming. Your expression started turning angry and Bucky regretted speaking.

"I can't believe you're really blaming this on me and making me feel guilty, saying it's my fault you got wounded." You tried to get off him.

"Doll, that's not what I meant!" He defended himself.

"I told you to stop calling me that!" You both argued and heads started turning towards the scene. "Get your hands off me." You spat out. Steve came back towards you both as your voices started getting louder.

"No! P-Please listen to me!" The winter soldier begged you as he kept his arms on your waist.

"Buck, stop." Steve said to him. Bucky looked at your face and when he saw you had tears in your eyes he released you. You walked to a seat and ignored the SHIELD agents who were pretending they absolutely weren't watching and listening. You hated this. You were stuck on this plane and you couldn't hide to cry so you tried to hold back your tears but it was hard. Your heart ached, everything hurt. How did this happen? What happened to the Bucky who was doing everything to make you happy? What happened to the Bucky who healed your deep scars? Why all he did lately was hurt you? You couldn't help sobbing quietly on your seat. You didn't even care if they all noticed you. That one agent you spoke with at the beginning handed you a handkerchief and you accepted it.

"Thank you." You muttered. He went back to his seat, he understood this probably wasn't the time to comfort you or get you to vent to him. After all, you didn't even know each other, this was the first time you met.

After a really long flight you finally landed, you quickly waved goodbye to the SHIELD agents you met and then headed to the car without waiting for Steve or Bucky. You got in the back seat and prayed to God they weren't going to speak to you. You just wanted to go to your room and cry right now. You saw Bucky approach the car first while Steve was still talking to an agent and your heart started beating faster. You swore that if he dared open his mouth and speak to you you would activate your suit and get the hell out of this situation. Why couldn't Steve come back quicker, he knew the situation was chaotic. Bucky opened the door and took place in the passenger seat in the front. You stared out the window, you didn't want to risk crossing his gaze in the rearview mirror. Thankfully Bucky didn't speak too. You both just waited for Steve in absolute dreadful silence. The captain finally came and got into the driver's seat.

"Well? Mission accomplished! Your first mission was a success [Y/N]!" Steve cheered. You didn't reply, you honestly didn't care at all. The captain looked at you for an answer but after a little while he gave up and started the car.

It was now 11am. During the whole ride nobody spoke and when you arrived in the parking lot of the tower the silence continued. You three rode the elevator, you stopped at your floor and let the two super soldiers together. When you finally reached your room you dropped on your bed and cried, again.

  
  


\---

  
  


One hour later you headed to the kitchen to have lunch. After crying for a good time on your own you had showered to erase all traces of the mission on your body and tears on your face. This time unfortunately, everyone was here.

"Hey [Y/N]!" Tony greeted. "Steve told us you did an amazing job on your mission." You eyed Steve who was sitting around the table and he smiled at you which relaxed you a little.

"Thanks." You said quietly.

"Come sit with us, there's pasta." Nat said to you. You grabbed a plate from the shelf and ustensils in the drawer then went to sit next to her. Bucky was also here but thankfully he was seated between Steve and Natasha. You didn't know if he had glanced at you and honestly you didn't care, you totally ignored him.

"Hey, you both." Bruce said to Thor and Loki who had just entered the dining room too.

"Are we late?" The God of thunder asked.

"Not at all, [Y/N] just arrived as well." Tony told the Asgardians. You crossed eyes with them and they both smiled at you which honestly made you feel better, you still had friends in this tower. Not that the others had done anything to you but you started to really appreciate the two Gods. When you thought back of your first encounter with Thor you never would have guessed you'd come to appreciate him and he'd be one of your favorites here.

"How was your mission by the way?" Thor asked you as approached the table.

"Accomplished, so good I guess." You replied humbly.

"It was more than that, you did a really good job." Steve complimented you again. You tried to make yourself look smaller in your chair, you weren't used to this.

"That's awesome. Loki asked after you." You held a breath.

"No, I did not." He said to his brother.

"Yes, you did." Thor teased him. Oh God, what the fuck was going on? Loki let out an awkward little chuckle.

"I think you must've hit your head brother. You seem to have memories only you can remember." He glared at Thor to silence him. The God of thunder grinned in amusement but said nothing else. You digged into your food pretending this absolutely wasn't awkward as hell. Though you wondered if it were true. Did Loki really ask after you? Why would he? Then he took place next to you and Thor next to him. For a minute everyone was quiet and you could only hear the sound of forks hitting against plates. Thankfully someone finally broke the atrocious silence.

"So, did any of you get nightmares after the movie?" Nat asked to soften the atmosphere.

"I did." Thor confessed truthfully which made you smile. "Though I doubt Tony and Bruce could since they slept through the whole thing."

"Hey!" Bruce retorted in a fake offended voice.

"We're the ones who work the most here, excuse us for being humans and getting tired at the end of the day." Tony added.

"How about you, cookie?" Loki asked you as he shifted a bit on his chair to look at you.

"I couldn't close my eyes for quite some time during the night but it wasn't because of the movie." You replied.

"The mission I suppose?" He said to you. You bit your lower lip. You unconsciously glanced at Bucky and thought back of the fight you had, alas you crossed eyes with him so you quickly reported your attention back to the Asgardian.

"Yeah, the mission." You lied but Loki saw clear through you.

"I'm gonna pretend I believe that to not embarrass you." He said.

"I'm sorry, it's not against you. I just don't want to talk about it right now and... _here_." You said quietly to him. He nodded and you were thankful he didn't try to preach harder. You continued to eat and talk a bit with the God of mischief, as surprising as it was he was actually pleasant and you started to find yourself enjoying talking to him.

"Wait, you have something there cookie." Loki brought his thumb to the corner of your lips and wiped a stain of sauce before bringing his finger to his mouth. Your eyes widened as your turned red. Did he not realize what he just did??

"T-Thanks..." You stuttered in embarrassment. You took your napkin and wiped your mouth thorougly feeling ashamed.

But this was the last straw for someone who kept watching you and the God of mischief the whole time. Bucky got up from his chair and _loudly_ before exiting the room. If he stayed any longer he would lose his cool and launch at Loki. But this was the winter soldier's problem, you didn't follow after him. After all you had done nothing wrong.

 


	16. Just A Kiss

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the way I wanted to warn y'all I can post these chapters rather quickly because when I first posted this fic I already had the first eight chapters written and at the moment I'm currently writing chapter 22. I don't know how long I can keep posting these chapters daily but just don't get worried if I suddenly start posting every 3 or 4 days :)  
> Like I said kudos and comments motivate me to write and you guys have been very supportive so far and I thank you for it!

After Bucky left the dining room Steve and Nat followed him. They gathered on the balcony.

"I'm losing her." The winter soldier let out as he faced forward to look at the sunny view.

"It's not too late." Steve reassured him again.

"Yes, it is. Now she's getting close to someone else."

"What, Loki? Are you mad?" Nat asked him. "C'mon, he's a criminal."

"Her heart's too good, she will see past that if she wants to." Bucky said.

"Aww, that's so cute." Nat smiled. "I'll talk to her and see how she feels, okay?"

"It's too late, we fought again during the mission."

"What??" She eyed Steve who confirmed. "What happened?" The captain told her about the scene and then Nat took a pause to think. "Well, you know... As sad as it is but if she cries and reacts that means she cares. So there's that at least."

"When she's with Loki she smiles and laughs and when she's with me she cries. I can't fix this." Bucky sulked.

"Well, not with this attitude that's for sure." Steve said. Bucky let out a long sigh. "I think it's a good idea you try talking with her, at least we'll be fixed on how she feels." He said to Nat.

"You know..." Bucky started. "During the mission when she healed me... I really thought we got back what we had, she got annoyed at my jokes like she always did." The winter soldier smiled sadly as he talked about how he felt. "I was wounded and despite what happened she was reassuring me. She's a real angel." He concluded as a tear streamed down his cheek.

"Hey, I promise you it's gonna get better." The captain said as he put a hand on his best friend's shoulder.

"She'll come back, I'm sure of it." Nat reassured him.

  
  


During that time you were still in the kitchen with everyone else. You knew something was wrong with Bucky but it wasn't your role to comfort him anymore. He wasn't your friend, you were _**in love**_ with him and he had betrayed you.

"D-Do you want to get out of here?" You asked Loki after you were both done with your lunch.

"Where do you want to go?" He asked you as he raised his eyebrows.

"I don't know, I need fresh air." You paused. "We can't get out though, how about the roof?"

"Sure." Loki replied. You both got up and walked out together.

"What's going on?" Tony asked. "Her friending Bucky was already surprising enough for me but now _him_?"

"Is it a good idea to leave them together?" Bruce asked.

"My brother won't harm her." Thor defended Loki.

"She has the suit, I'm not worried." Tony reassured Bruce. "And they're still in the tower."

"It's funny how out of everyone here [Y/N] friended the most two dangerous people." Bruce smiled.

"Yeah, really funny..." Tony zoned out.

  
  


"Thanks for accompanying me." You smiled to Loki in a friendly way.

"It's nothing, cookie." He replied.

"Still, I appreciate." You were both sitting on the ground in the middle of the roof, it was sunny but you didn't mind.

"Do you want to tell me about what kept you awake this time?" The God of mischief directly asked you. You breathed deeply.

"Are you sure you want to hear? I don't wanna annoy you." You told him.

"I have nothing else to do." He joked.

"Fine." You sighed. "After the movie I took the elevator with Bucky and we... fought."

"And because..?" Loki asked.

"Right, I forgot you weren't there since the beginning. I got used to having you around in the tower." You smiled. "We, uh..." You paused. "I-I... God, I don't even know how to put it." You said as you lowered your head. "Bucky and I had a thing? I think."

"You think?" Loki repeated.

"We never put a word on it, never talked about it either." You explained. "But that's not the point." You paused. "I haven't been in this tower for a long time and Bucky was immediately nice to me and we got closer. I think since we were both alone, I don't know, it just matched." You explained to the Asgardian. "Basically everything was going well until my birthday party."

"What happened?" He asked. You let out a dry chuckle.

"You." You let out. Loki raised his eyebrows.

"Me?" He asked, confused.

"Bucky saw us when we danced, you remember?"

"I don't remember him being there but I remember dancing with you, yes." Loki smiled.

"He disappeard from the party and I searched for him all night until I..."

"You found him." That wasn't a question but a confirmation. You nodded.

"He was kissing a woman and-" You took a deep breath. "It hurt me like never before and trust me on that, I have been hurt in the past." You passed your hand on your face. "I avoided him as much as I could but when I couldn't he spoke and told me he saw me dance with you. At the moment it made me angry because that was absolutely nothing." You told Loki. And the God of mischief agreed. _Back then it was nothing_. "In the elevator he told me he missed me, that he was sorry then during the mission we fought again because he got wounded and Bucky told me it was my fault because he couldn't get me out of his mind." Loki got closer to you and put his arm around your shoulder as he noticed you were shaking.

"Calm down, it's going to be fine." He reassured you. His kindness surprised you but you appreciated it.

"I-I don't recognize him, he was so nice and doing everything to make me happy but now all he does is hurt me."

"What do you want from him now?" Loki asked you.

"I-I have no idea. Yes I do miss him but everytime I look at him I'm just reminded of what I saw in that hallway. Him kissing that girl against the wall and I surprised them. I just wonder what he would've done if I didn't catch them. Would he have told me later?" You sighed. "I'm so lost." You turned your head to look at Loki. "I'm sorry, I must be annoying you with this."

"You're not." He smiled at you. You stared into his eyes.

"Why are you being so nice to me anyway?" You asked Loki.

"I think I'm starting to like you, cookie." He admitted and your face reddened.

"Wha-" The word died at the tip of your tongue when the God of mischief suddenly put his lips against yours. For a moment you remained in shock and didn't move at all. Loki broke the kiss after a short moment and you brought your hands to your face. "W-What did you do??"

"I believe it's called a kiss." He replied with a grin.

"Stop with your jokes Loki, why did you do it?!" You asked in panic.

"I wanted to." You took a deep breath and passed your hands through your hair.

"Oh fuck, what am I gonna do?" You spoke to yourself.

"Hey, at least now you're even with Bucky." Loki said to you. How was he so calm?? "Cookie, you seem a bit panicked." He noticed.

"How can I not be?! I-I kissed another man." You let out.

"Technically I kissed you." Loki smiled playfully. He was right about one thing though, now you and Bucky were even.

"How am I gonna tell him?" You sulked.

"You know you don't have to right?" Loki asked you.

"Well like you noticed, I'm a bad liar. He's gonna see through me for sure." You let out.

"And even if he does, are you and him in a relationship?" Your heart missed a beat.

"No... You're right, we're not." You lowered your gaze.

"Then I guess it's not too late for me to play my cards." Your eyes widened. You raised your head to look at him and say something but he spoke first. "I told you, I think I'm starting to like you." What the fuck. You were on the edge of a nervous breakdown. Before you had came into this tower you had never kissed anybody, no one ever liked you and suddenly you find yourself kissing two men and one of them even confessed to you. The tower had to be cursed or something there was no other way.

"L-Loki, I-I... I-I'm sorry I don't know what to say, no one had ever told me they liked me before..." Now it was Loki's turn to be surprised.

"Don't worry, I didn't expect you to tell me you felt the same. I'm just asking you to let me _seduce_ you properly." He said. "If, of course, you're indeed not promised to Bucky already." He added.

"No, you're right... We were- I'm not." You replied.

"Good." He took a deep breath before looking at you. "I apologize if my kiss startled you by the way."

"I-It's fine, don't worry about that. You're right, I'm doing nothing wrong." You repeated.

"Then would I be pushing your boundaries if I asked to kiss you again?" Oh God, why was your heart beating faster? You were stuck in a mental debate with yourself. You knew that no matter how much you repeated to yourself you were doing nothing wrong you still felt guilty. Then you thought back about the pain you felt on your birthday party, spending hours searching for the man you loved and finding him having fun with another woman. You had the right to try and have fun too. You looked at Loki and finally nodded.

  
  


\---

  
  


You and the God of mischief were now sitting in front of the kitchen counter and digging into a tub of icecream. The heat of the sun and _makeout session_ had made your heads feel heavy. You couldn't believe you did this but the worst is that you didn't hate it. You really appreciated Loki. Sure, not as much as Bucky but the Asgardian was here for you and for someone like you who wasn't used to kindness and having someone care for them it was enough to make your heart race.

"Hey, you're here." Nat said to you, ignoring Loki.

"I am." You replied.

"Can you come with me? I want to talk about something." She asked. You looked at Loki as if you were asking for permission and he smiled at you which reassured you.

"I'll see you later." You said to him before walking out with Nat. She grabbed your arm when you were out of the God of mischief's sight and dragged you to a different floor so no one could bother you.

"What are you doing??" She asked you with furrowed brows.

"What do you mean?" You asked.

"Don't play dumb with me [Y/N], Bucky may find it cute but I don't." She released you. "What are you playing at with Loki?" You rolled your eyes.

"He's... nice to me." You replied.

"Please tell me you're joking."

"I'm not."

"Then you're completely unconscious. I don't think you actually know who he is." This time you were the one who's brows furrowed.

"I don't care what he's done, he treats me nicely and I need it at the moment."

"You need Bucky." She said to you.

"Don't talk to me about him!" You yelled.

"And why not?" Nat asked.

"He betrayed me! I hate him! I was looking forward to spend the evening with him on my birthday party! I even let you relook me because for the first time I wanted to look nice for somebody but you know what happened after you left me alone? Bucky didn't show up at all and while _Loki_ was making me have a nice time Bucky was too busy making out with another woman!" You cried as you spilled your feelings out. "Everytime I look at him the scene keeps replaying in my head, it keeps me awake at night. The way he was kissing her, had his hands on her and even before I surprised them I heard him laugh with her in the hallway. He was having the time of his life with that girl. If he feels so miserable he can just join her again!" You were about to run away but Nat catched you again.

"Stay right there!"

"Leave me alone Natasha, you have no idea how I feel!" You cried harder. "He was lying to me the whole time! When he was telling me that he needed me, that I was the best thing that happened to him, that he never wanted to lose me. Why did he hurt me like that then?!" You dropped to your knees as sobbed. She kneeled next to you as she sighed.

"He's made a mistake okay? I know you don't want to hear it but he got really hurt when he saw you dancing with Loki." She put her hand on your shoulder. "But I promise you that since that night he regrets it all, he misses you very badly and all he wants is the chemistry you both had back."

"You don't understand, I don't trust him anymore." You told her as you wiped the tears out of your eyes.

"Oh, c'mon it was just a kiss." Something inside you snapped.

"Just a kiss?! Nat, what the-" The next thing she did left you baffled. Nat put her lips against yours.

"See? Just a kiss. Do you suddenly have romantic feelings for me now?" You shaked your head. "Then you can understand he doesn't have feelings for that woman."

"Okay, let's admit. T-There might be another problem..." You started. "I-I... Me and Loki kissed." Nat's eyes widened but soon enough she let out a low sigh.

"It was just a kiss." She repeated. "Do you have feelings for Loki?" She asked. You hated that you hesitated to reply.

"It doesn't matter. My feelings for Bucky are deeper." She smiled at your reply.

"Good."

"I honestly don't see what's good in my situation. I like Bucky but I'm nowhere near ready to talk with him and Loki is actually nice and I want to let him have a chance."

"Okay, can you please stop? Loki isn't for you and as soon as we find out what he's plotting Thor is sending him right back to Asgard." Nat reminded you. "What would it take for you to forgive Bucky?"

"I-I don't know."

"Knowing you can't blame him for the kiss anymore since you did worse."

"I- what??"

"You kissed Loki and me." She winked. "Okay, seriously. Will you at least talk with Bucky?" You sighed.

"I-I guess, sure." You let out.

"Victory!" She cheered. "At long last." She got up and gave you her hand so you could stand back on your feet. "Alright, go back to your room. I'll come get you later."

  
  


\---

  
  


You had been stressing all afternoon about what you were going to say to Bucky once you'd talk to him. You had no idea what Nat was planning too and it made you nervous. You had warned Loki about the discussion you had with her and he was also aware of your feelings for Bucky. You wanted to be very honest with him to not play with his feelings. You knew too well what that felt like to do it to other people. Finally a knock was heard in your room.

"Go get ready, we're going out." Nat said to you when you opened the door.

"What? And who's we?" You asked.

"Just you, me, Steve and Bucky." She replied. Of course, the winter soldier team. "Hurry, they're already waiting for us in the parking lot."

"Hey, you could've warned me sooner instead of letting me stress myself out in here." You said as you opened your closet and grabbed your clothes. When you were finally done you and Nat took the elevator and made it to the parking lot.

"Ah, here she is." Steve announced with a smile as you stepped out of the elevator with Nat. The captain and the winter soldier were both leaning against the car as they waited for you. Your heart missed a beat when you crossed eyes with Bucky. Suddenly you didn't feel as confident anymore.

"C'mon get in!" Nat said. Steve took the driver seat and you took the passenger seat in the back behind him. Bucky was about to sit at the front next to Steve but Nat stopped him and gestured him to sit next to you in the back. "Go!" She told him discreetly. You said nothing when he sat next to you and the proximity made your heart beat too fast inside your chest. Yup, you still felt it you thought to yourself, which was good news for the winter soldier.

"Where are we going?" You asked after you fastened your seatbelt.

"Somewhere relaxing and nice." Nat replied. That could be one million places.

 


	17. Reconciliation

The front part of the car was lively with Steve and Nat talking about random things and never letting the conversation die while in the back it was completely quiet. You and Bucky had no idea how to start the conversation. You didn't even know if the other wanted to talk so you both just stared out your respective windows and listened to the conversation at the front. But suddenly Bucky's had enough so he gathered his courage and dared to put his hand on yours. You flinched in surprise but decided it was a nice start so you didn't remove it. You had indeed missed his warmth after all. Bucky smiled and tangled his fingers with yours. He turned his head to look at you but you didn't dare cross his eyes, you stayed focused on the scenery outside.

At long last Steve finally stopped the car, you had arrived to the destination. The beach. You had guessed Nat didn't suggest this place for you guys to go surfing since it was really late in the afternoon but she had a good idea, you liked watching the waves during sunset. It was indeed relaxing. You got out of the car with the team and took a deep breath of the salty air.

"How about we go take a walk on the sand?" Steve suggested.

"I like the sound of that." Nat smiled at him.

"Sure." You replied as you shrugged.

"Same." Bucky said.

"Alright, let's go gang." Steve concluded. And so you started walking alongside the water, not too close though since none of you removed their shoes. Nat clinged to Steve's arm and walked in the front with him while you and Bucky stayed next to each other behind them. You said nothing for a little while, you only enjoyed listening to the sea waves. As Steve and Nat started walking a little faster than you and the winter soldier he decided now was the time to start a conversation.

"I-I'm glad you came." Bucky said as he turned his head to look at you and you noticed he stuttered a bit. Was he as nervous as you? Because, boy, you sure were.

"Nat is good at persuading me into doing things." You replied and then let out a low sigh. C'mon, you could be friendlier, Bucky was actually trying unlike you. You took a deep breath. "D-Do you wanna sit down?" You asked him. "I-I mean, I think it's a good time." You said in reference to when Bucky asked you when would be a good time to finally talk. You and Bucky turned your heads and noticed Steve and Nat were gone, this was probably their attention all along though. He smiled at you as he nodded and then you both proceeded to sit on the sand in front of the sea. The sun was slowly setting, it was very beautiful.

"First of all, I-I apologize... I'm sorry you had to see what you saw that night." Bucky started. "I really didn't think about what I was doing." He continued. "I know I'm responsible for what I did and I have my wrongdoings in this but I swear to you do- [Y/N]-" He corrected himself. "I wasn't looking for a girl to hurt you or something like this, she came to me and I noticed she was flirting and then I-I saw you dancing with _him_ and something snapped in my head." You listened to him without talking. "She hurried me to follow her and I know I could've said no but with the crowd and the music and I wanted to stop seeing him put his hands on you so I followed her to another floor of the tower." Bucky explained himself. Your lower lip was trembling, you didn't know if you wanted to cry or scream, it all just hurt so much.

"I-I looked for you the whole night." You started. "I asked everyone several times, I even gathered my courage to ask people I had never spoken with before." You breathed deeply to calm your emotions and not break down. "I-I was looking forward to that night. I had never been to a party or even danced with somebody." You played nervously with the sand in front of you with your finger. "And at first it was Loki who asked me to dance and when I revealed him I never did it before he didn't mock me that's why I accepted." You explained yourself this time. "That kinda... moved me? I don't know how to explain. Y-You know I've been bullied for every little thing in my past b-but anyway..." You paused. "I came with Nat at the party and then she met with her friends and I was alone, the only one who stayed with me was Loki." You said. "And then I saw Steve and asked after you, you know the rest. It was getting very late so I decided to go back to my room. The elevator was busy so I took the stairs and-" A few tears streamed down your cheeks. "I-I really wanted to spend my first birthday party with you, Bucky." You finished your sentence in a high pitched voice before finally breaking down in sobs. Bucky approached you and put his arms around you, you were both crying in each other's arms.

"I'm so sorry, I'm really sorry..." He cried as he trembled against your shoulder. Your throat felt constricted and your heart stung inside your chest, once again you were suffering and you really wished it would stop. "I-I promised you I'd let nobody hurt you ever again and I hate that I'm the one who did it." He kneeled in front of you after he wiped his tears away. "There's not one thing I wouldn't do to erase what happened on that night. I would do anything to go back in time and escort you my damn self to that party." Your uncontrollable sobbing had calmed down a bit so the winter soldier put his hands on each side of your face to look into your eyes. "Do you believe me?" He asked you desperately.

You stared into his eyes, he looked so sincere but you were so lost.

"D-Did you mean everything you said to me?" You asked. "All the night conversations we had... W-When you said you didn't want to lose me..." You paused before continuing. "P-Please, were you lying to me when you said those things Bucky?" He stared back into your eyes, he could tell you really needed those answers to move on.

"Every single word. I meant all of them. I swear to you, I never lied when we were just the two of us together." Bucky confirmed. You let out a long sigh of relief as you closed your eyes. "The happiest moment of my life as far as I can remember-" He paused, he couldn't contain his smile appearing on his face. "When I woke up after you helped me with my nightmare and you stayed with me the whole night... You were curled up on my bed, you were half naked and cold but despite that you trusted me enough to stay." Bucky took your hands in his. "I'll never forget what I felt that morning." He grinned at you and the stungs you had felt until now inside your chest were replaced with warmth. Suddenly his expression changed and he looked at you seriously. "Please [Y/N]... Tell me what I need to do for you to forgive me. I miss you so very much." He confessed.

"I-I don't know." You started. "I don't know how I feel anymore, it's not just the party. The fight we had in the elevator and then in the plane, I can't believe you rea- Buck, are you seriously staring at my nose right now?" You asked as you brought your hand to your face. He had that stupid grin on his face that annoyed the shit out of you.

"I can't help it, it's so adorable." He let out with a genuine laugh.

"You're really an idiot." You told him as you removed your hand from your face and before you knew it Bucky tackled you on the sand and hugged you tightly against him.

"Let me go, I can't breathe and you're dirtying my clothes." You rolled your eyes.

"I'm never letting you go ever again. Everytime I leave you alone something happens." The winter soldier buried his face in the crook of your neck and kept you close to him for what seemed like an eternity to you. Finally he moved off you and helped you sit back on your butt. "Let's watch the sunset since we're here." Bucky suggested to you.

"Didn't know you were so romantic." You teased.

"I'll take you on a real date." He replied.

"Stop joking around, Bucky." You rolled your eyes again.

"What? I'm serious, I'll do it." You smiled at him before facing forward to look at the sun. The winter soldier came closer to you and put his arm around your shoulders. As you looked at the horizon you noticed Bucky wasn't watching but he was looking at you the whole time.

"Aren't you gonna watch the view?" You asked him.

"It's right in front of me." He replied and your heart missed a beat. God, you had forgotten he could do that to you. You blushed at his answer, he had knocked air out of your lungs and you had no idea what to reply to that. Then you saw him shuffle next to you and you wondered what he was doing. Bucky took your hand and placed an object in your palm. "I-I took it before heading to the parking lot in hope that... we would reconcile. Please take it back." You looked at your palm and saw the familiar pendant he had offered you. You smiled in nostalgia as you looked at the necklace before raising your head to stare into his eyes.

"Fine." You let out. "But only because I really meant it when I said it was beautiful and it was my first gift." Bucky grinned.

"Can I put it on you?" He asked and you nodded. The winter soldier moved behind you and you moved your hair out of the way so he could attach it. When he was done Bucky took the opportunity to put a kiss against your nape. You shivered under his touch but you couldn't just go back to where you left off with him. Too many things had happened.

"B-Bucky..." You started. "I will need time, okay?" You said in a quiet voice. "I-I forgive you but I-I can't just go back to where we left off and pretend nothing happened. What we had got severly damaged and we need to build it again."

"I understand and I'll wait as much as you need me to." He reassured you with a smile. You didn't know if he was pretending to be okay with your decision but that's the best you could give him for now. "I'm glad you're not mad against me anymore." You smiled at him.

"Alright, so where do you think Nat and Steve went? It's been a while now." You decided to change subjects. Bucky got up and then gave you his hands to help you back on your feet too.

"They were heading over there so we can go in the same direction? If they're not we can head back to the car." Bucky suggested.

"Alright, let's go." You replied.

As you were walking next to each other you realized how good it made you feel to not be mad with Bucky anymore. You really missed him too and you were glad you could put that upsetting episode in the past.

"Do you wanna go for some ice cream?" Bucky asked you as you passed a vendor on the beach.

"I think I had enough for today, I already ate some earlier with-" You stopped yourself. Oh no, you forgotten about the God of mischief. Unfortunately Bucky could read through you now.

"With Loki?" He asked. You stayed silent but the winter soldier knew. "It's fine, you do what you want." He reassured you. You started feeling even more guilty, you didn't know if you should tell Bucky how far you already went with the Asgardian. You really didn't want to hurt him with that revelation. You decided to keep silent.

"Actually I think I'm gonna go for a popsicle." You told him with determination.

"You sure?" He asked you.

"Yeah, it's refreshing and I'm feeling warm." You said.

"Alright." Bucky said as he walked towards the vendor. Fuck, he sounded upset and you just wanted him to smile again. You had to stop mentioning Loki's name around him. "Here you go." The winter soldier handed you your treat after you told him the flavor you wanted and you both proceeded to search for your chaperones again.

"Thank you." You noticed Bucky took a different ice cream than you as you were ripping off the paper. You didn't know why but it stung you a bit. "S-So... I-It's getting late." You were so uncomfortable, you had no idea what to do to cheer him up.

"Yeah, maybe Steve and Natasha left us here." He joked. Oh, thanks God.

"I don't think they'll even notice us not being in the car. The ride was so uncomfortable in the back seat." You said.

"Oh, you too?" Bucky smiled at you and you both let out a small laugh.

"I-It made me happy when you reached for my hand." You confessed. "C-Can I?" You asked him as you moved your arm towards his.

"Of course, do- [Y/N]." The winter soldier corrected himself again. But you shaked your head as you smiled.

"You can call me that again." You told him as you grabbed his hand. It warmed your heart when you saw the small glimmer of happiness going through his eyes. After walking for a little while and not finding your teammates you and Bucky decided to head back and wait for them next to the car. As you were eating on your popsicle you didn't notice Bucky glancing at you from time to times. He watched the way your lips encircled the ice and sometimes your tongue would lap at the droplets at the base of the popsicle. He started sweating and it was not because of the warmth of this day. Bucky tried looking away but Goddamn it was hard. As you approached the car you noticed two people were already inside. "They were there the whole time?" You asked.

"They could've warned us." Bucky said. Nat and Steve smiled at you guys as you approached. You threw the ice cream trash into a bin and then climbed in the back seat with Bucky. "We spent like thirty minutes looking for you both."

"It was too warm, we stayed here and put on the AC." Nat said before moving on her seat to look in the back and face you both. "Looks like things are going well though?" She added with a smirk. "Nice necklace, [Y/N]." You smiled at her.

"They are." You replied.

"I'm happy for you both." Steve added. "Alright, let's head back." Then the captain started the car. After you fastened your seatbelt you gently reached for Bucky's hand. He lowered his gaze to your hands before looking up at you and smiling.

  
  


\---

  
  


When you arrived at the tower the four of you walked into the living space where the rest of the Avengers were chilling. You noticed Loki was missing.

"Hey." Nat said to them.

"Oh, you're back." Tony noticed. "Where did you all go?"

"A walk at the beach. It was nice." Steve replied.

"Why weren't we invited?" Thor asked.

"Car's too small for you." Bucky told him. You held back a giggle.

"Promise, next time I'll invite you." You said to the God of thunder.

"I knew you were the only one I can count on [Y/N]." He smiled at you. You went to sit next to him on the couch.

"What have you been up to?" You asked him to make small talk.

"Nothing interesting. I had a talk with my brother, even if he doesn't seem hostile at the moment I can't lower my guard around him." Thor turned his head to look at you. "And you shouldn't either." He reminded you. "But even I gotta admit he seems nicer. I think it's because of you." You blushed.

"D-Don't talk nonsense..." You stuttered.

"I'm not in Loki's head though so I never know what he thinks."

"Yeah, I get that feeling too." You said as you faced forward. You seemed lost in your thoughts. "Where is he now?" You asked the Asgardian.

"I don't know. His room I suppose?" Thor replied. You got up and walked out of the room. Bucky saw you but he said nothing. You needed to have a talk with Loki too. You headed for the elevator and when the doors closed on you, you spoke to the AI.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. guide me to Loki's room." You ordered.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Summer is here, don't forget to pick up your trash at the beach, don't litter >:(


	18. I Trust You

When you got out of the elevator you walked through a long hallway and then stopped in front of a door the AI guided you to. You took a deep breath and finally knocked on the door. Soon enough, it opened.

"Cookie, you're back." The nickname made you smile, it was so lovely. If someone had told you one day that the God of mischief would give you a cute name like that you would've never believed it. Then again, if the same person told you you'd become an Avengers you would've never believed it either. Loki grabbed your arm gently and pulled you inside. "Why are you smiling?" He asked.

"Nothing, it's just the name." You let out a little giggle.

"I think it suits you. You're tempting like a cookie resting inside a jar that children are not allowed to touch." He said to you with a smirk as he came closer to you. A blush immediately crept on your cheeks.

"Wh-" You were speechless.

"You're adorable when you're flustered, dear." Your heart started beating faster.

"A-Anyway..." You stuttered. "I came to talk to you about something." Loki took a deep breath before giving you his hand.

"Alright, come." You took his hand. "Do you trust me?" He asked you. You hesitated, every voices inside your head shouted at you that you shouldn't but deep down in your heart you knew the truth. You indeed trusted him.

"I-I do." You finally let out as you stared into his eyes. Something in his expression changed, you only saw it for half a second, his usual playful smirk and mysterious gaze had disappeard. Loki looked like he was surprised? Maybe he felt validated? Maybe it was the first time someone told him they trusted him and he believed it? Guess you'll never know because the God of Mischief replied something that left you feeling confused.

"You shouldn't." He simply said. "But for this you can." He continued. "Close your eyes, cookie." You looked into his eyes one last time before finally closing them and squeezing his hand in yours. At first you felt him gently brush his lips against yours but then the atmosphere changed too. It was so bizarre, you couldn't explain it. "You can open your eyes now." Loki reassured you. You found him staring at you with a gentle expression but then it hit you. You weren't in his room anymore, actually this isn't even the tower.

"What?" You looked around you, you didn't recognize this place. You were in a park? You're actually outside? It was the beginning of the night but you could see it, there were trees, colorful plants and flowers, this was one of the prettiest sight you've ever seen. "Loki, where are we??" You asked him in confusion.

"We're still on Earth if that's what you're wondering." The God of mischief joked as you kept looking around. You stopped moving to look into his eyes.

"Did you teleport?" You asked.

"Indeed." He revealed. "You'll excuse me but I'm not a fan of the room they gave me, I prefer this scenery much more." You smiled.

"Yes, it's really beautiful." You commented. Loki kept your hand in his as he guided you to a bench in the park.

"I believe you wanted to talk, cookie." Suddenly your smile faded away. You were so lost in your feelings and you didn't want to hurt Loki. You sat down on the bench and turned your body a bit to face him.

"I spoke with Bucky this afternoon." You told him. Loki took a deep breath and before you let him imagine the worst you continued. "I-I decided to forgive him for what happened. We made peace but we're-" You paused which made Loki's stress level up. "We're not together or anything." You finally let out. Loki freed the breath he was holding. He was relieved and it surprised him. Maybe he had deeper feelings than what he thought.

"What are your feelings for Bucky?" Loki asked you.

"Before the party I-I loved him... He didn't know and I only told Nat and... you." You said. "But things changed."

"Because of your argument?" He asked. You took a deep breath.

"Because of **you**." You revealed. You lowered your gaze, you were so embarrassed you didn't want to look into his eyes.

"What are your feelings for me?" Loki continued. He had to know.

"I-I'd be lying to myself if I said I feel nothing. I-I do, I feel something. I felt something when we danced, I felt something when we watched the movie, I felt something when you kissed me..." You shivered. "B-But I'm lost, I-I also still feel things for Bucky..." You gathered your courage and decided to face the God of mischief. "I don't want to hurt you or Bucky, you both have been the only people who ever treated me right and made me feel so... _**loved**_." Tears started appearing in the corner of your eyes. "I-I feel so selfish, you both deserve someone better than me." Loki came closer to you and wrapped his arms around you.

"All I'm getting from this conversation is that you feel something for me, cookie." Loki started. "And-" He chuckled lightly, he felt embarrassed too. "It's making my heart beat faster, I feel happy right now." You wiped your tears and backed up to look at his face.

"Loki you understand that means I have to take a decision right? I can't play with both of you."

"I understand, cookie." He reassured you with a smile. "I still have a chance with you, right?" He asked.

"You do." You answered truthfully. Your heart was split in half at the moment and one part belonged to the God of mischief and the other to the winter soldier. Why did this have to happen to you? No one had ever loved you before and all it took is one wounded SHIELD agent for your life to change drastically. Loki brought his hand to your cheek and gently traced the lines of your face with his finger before leaning to kiss you. "Hm!" You gasped against his mouth. "L-Loki, I-I can't, it's not right... Not until I-" He smirked before kissing you again and _crap_ , you kissed him back because you really liked it.

"Your actions don't match with your words, cookie." There it was again, his mischievous expression. "Look me in the eyes and tell me you don't want to kiss me." He challenged you. You bit onto your lower lip before huffing and crossing your arms on your chest in annoyance.

"I-It's not that I don't want to... It's not right." You said with a sad expression. "Let's say... What if while I spend time with Bucky I kissed him behind your back?"

"I wouldn't mind." He _shrugged_.

"Loki!" Your eyes widened.

"What? As long as you kiss me too, I don't mind." His honesty baffled you.

"Well, I do. I mind very much. If you kissed other girls I wouldn't be happy about it." You said.

"I don't want to kiss any other girls." Loki said to you with a small smirk.

"T-That's not the point!" You blushed. You couldn't believe what he just said.

"So, you do?" He asked you as he raised one eyebrow.

"I do what?" You repeated.

"You actually do want to kiss me right now?" Loki smirked and God knew that was bad news.

"Why do you have to be so annoying right now?" You asked as you rolled your eyes. "W-We have to go back to the tower." You said to him.

"I will if you kiss me." He played.

"Wh-" You gasped.

"You want to cookie, you're just finding excuses." He came closer to you on the bench and towered you with all his might. "If you can look me in the eyes and tell me you don't want to kiss me I will take you back, I promise." Loki whispered to you. You stared into his beautiful and mysterious eyes, you were mesmerized. You closed your eyes and stopped thinking. You leaned into the God of mischief and smashed your mouth against his. You ran one hand through his silky black hair while Loki wrapped one arm around your waist and brought you against his torso. You moaned against the kiss when he ran his tongue on your lower lip, you parted them and let him invade your mouth. You felt nothing but pure desire and excitation.

"L-Loki..." You breathed against his mouth. You knew you had to stop.

"Be quiet." He ordered you before kissing you again. Your hand that was in his hair went to his nape and soon enough you wrapped your arms around his neck. Loki smiled against your lips. He knew you wanted this just as much as he did. The God of mischief playfully pulled on your lower lip with his teeth before giving your lips a cat lick and then kissed you again. Fuck, he was an amazing kisser and you were so in trouble. Your hands went to his shoulders and you finally suceeded on pushing him away. You lowered your head as you knew you were probably red as a beet right now.

"Please..." You panted. "You promised." You reminded him. Loki put a finger under your chin and raised your head to look into your eyes.

"Close your eyes." He ordered you. And you did. He couldn't help putting one last kiss on your mouth though and then when you felt the atmosphere change again you opened them. You were back in his room.

"Thank you." You said to him.

"Oh no, I thank _you_ , cookie." He smirked. You rolled your eyes.

"Anyway, do you wanna go down with me? I don't know what the others are doing." He shrugged. You sighed before taking his arm and pulling him out of his room. "C'mon, I'm not letting you alone in here." You knew just too well how that felt. The only people in the tower who tolerated his presence were you and Thor. You felt bad about leaving him alone. If you were in his position you would've appreciated if someone did the same for you. Loki followed behind you. You didn't see him but he smiled, your gesture moved him. When you were in the hallway you noticed something was weird. The lights were all red as if an alert went off.

"Is that normal?" Loki asked you as he looked around, he was as confused as you.

"I have no idea. That's the first time this happens since I live here." You started walking quickly towards the stairs. "Let's not take the elevator in case something is really going on. We'll try to find the others." You went down the stairs rather quickly and soon enough you made it to the tower entrance.

"Stay behind me." Loki ordered as he walked in front of you. "Just in case." Your eyes widened a bit and your stomach did a backflip, you didn't expect him to do that. As you were lost in your thoughts and a bit moved by his action suddenly a loud voice startled you and brought you harshly out of your reverie.

"LOKI!" You recognized Thor's voice and he instantly jumped on his brother's throat and pushed him against the wall. You let out a scream before running towards the God of thunder to grab his muscular arm so he could free Loki.

"Put him down! Are you mad?!" You yelled at Thor.

"Where the hell have you been?!" You turned around to face Tony and you were surprised to find him wearing his iron suit.

"Doll! Are you okay?!" This time Bucky ran towards you and wrapped his arms around your body. You were so confused.

"What is going on with you all??" You snapped. Nat, Steve and Bruce came running towards the chaos too and what shocked you is that they were all wearing their battle gears.

"What is going on with us?" Tony repeated. "You and Loki disappeard from the tower!" He shouted.

"And what about it?!" You defended yourself. Tony was about to lose his mind but Steve came behind him and put a hand on his shoulder.

"[Y/N], you're under our responsibility and Loki is not only a dangerous and powerful being, he's also our prisoner." Steve explained to you but there was no warmth in his tone.

"You flatter me." You heard Loki mock behind you.

"Silence!" Thor said to him. You got out of Bucky's grasp and walked back towards the Asgardians.

"Let him go! He did absolutely nothing to me!" You said to Thor angrily. He looked into your eyes before releasing his grip on his brother. Loki fell to his knees and you helped him stand up.

"Where have you two been?" Bruce asked. You didn't let Loki speak, you knew that whatever he would say they wouldn't trust him.

"I needed to talk to him so I-" You paused to choose your words carefully. "I asked him to teleport us out." The Avengers all looked baffled.

"Are yo-" Tony sighed deeply. "Are you out of your mind?!" He asked with anger.

"You can't trust him, [Y/N]." Nat reminded you.

"Oh, enough with that!" You couldn't stand to hear that anymore. "He had multiple times to harm me and he's never done it."

"Did you say anything to him?" Steve asked. You knew what he meant.

"He didn't even ask me once about it." You replied. "You're all making a big deal out of nothing. I thought the tower was under attack and-" You knew how you could make them lower their guard a little. "Loki was ready to defend me." You let out.

"Yeah, right." Tony said and you saw Nat hold back a chuckle.

"It's true!" You yelled angrily. God, this was going nowhere you needed support from someone else. So you turned to the only person who could defend the God of mischief. "Thor please, remember what you told me at the party." The God of thunder stared into your eyes. You looked at his expression and he looked like he was stuck in a mental debate with himself. "The secret you told me." You whispered to him. He sighed deeply before speaking.

"I believe [Y/N]." He announced to the others. A smile appeard on your face out of relief.

"C'mon, you're his brother." Tony said.

"I believe I'm also the first one who attacked him." He reminded the Avengers.

"Please, Tony. Why would I lie about this?" You pleaded him. "Don't you think that if Loki actually tried anything I would've activated that thing?" You rolled up your sleeve and showed him the iron wristband. "I admit it was a mistake to just run away from the tower with him and not warn at least one of you but I didn't think about it." You said to all of them. "I apologize for having you all worried but I'm fine. Isn't that the most important thing?" You looked at Steve, you knew he could be the one to calm things down. Steve stared into your eyes before letting out a sigh.

"She's got a point I guess. She's okay and she didn't tell him anything. False alarm." The captain concluded. Tony sighed deeply before walking out.

"Wait-" But Steve raised his hand in front of you.

"Let him calm down first, he's not going to listen to you right now." You were sad but you understood. "Thank you Steve... And I'm sorry." He put a reassuring hand on your shoulder before leaving as well. Nat and Bruce followed. Bucky left too but at the moment you didn't pay attention to him.

"Are you okay?" You asked Loki with a worried expression as you put a gentle hand on his arm.

"I'm fine." He simply replied. Then you turned to Thor who was still around.

"Thank you so much, Thor." You said as you grabbed one of his hands in yours. "I swear to you, everything I said is true!" You told him.

"[Y/N]-" Thor started. "Do you trust my brother?" He asked you in front of Loki.

"I do." You replied with determination. Loki's eyes widened. "I remember what you told me at the party and I think I know a bit more how your brother works but he's proved to me, with actions, that I can trust him." You said.

"Alright." The God of thunder smiled at you. You think that Thor might've been happy Loki had someone he could count on. And if it was someone as kind as you he just had to accept it. "Don't betray this one, brother. I doubt you're gonna find another one like her." Thor said to Loki as he pointed at you. You smiled at Thor before he walked out.

"Loki, I'm so sorry." You felt so bad about what had just happened. He really didn't deserve to be attacked by everyone else like that.

"I guess I really should've stayed in my room."

"No!" You let out a bit louder than intended. "What happened was really unfair, you did nothing wrong this time." You reassured him. "I-I promise you I'm gonna fix it." You said to him.

"What are you going to do?" He asked you as he furrowed his eyebrows. He was confused.

"I'll make them change their minds about you. I refuse to believe someone who acts so nice with someone like me is actually evil." You said as you grabbed his hands in yours. "I crossed path with really evil people in my past and you have nothing in common with them." You squeezed his hands as you stared into his eyes with a smile. Loki's heart was beating very fast and he knew he was fucked.

You didn't have time to blink that you suddenly found yourself in his room again and when you were finally alone he grabbed your face between his hands and kissed you deeply. His kiss was passionate and full of love, you could feel it. It was nothing like the kiss in the park earlier. The God of mischief couldn't describe what he was feeling at the moment. The way you defended him against all the Avengers, promised him to make them change their opinions about him and the expression you had on your face the whole time. You even told Thor to his face that you trusted him. Loki's never seen someone look so determined for his sake. No one had ever stood up for him like you did. Fuck all his plans, fuck the secret you kept from him and fuck this tower, now all he had in mind was you.

Loki wanted you.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everyone calm down, Bucky doesn't appear a lot in this chapter but he will later. Don't worry about the reader's fate.


	19. Torn

"Okay, you need to stop doing this." You said as you looked around after you both broke the kiss to pull back for air. "Teleporting me without warning me first."

"Fine, I'll warn you next time." Loki promised. You smiled at him before worrying again.

"Are you sure you're okay?" You asked.

"Cookie, you're forgetting again who you're speaking to." He smirked at you as he raised one eyebrow.

"Okay, I'm so sorry." You rolled your eyes in sarcasm. "I'm sorry for doubting the God of mischief and worryi-" You bit onto your lower lip as you turned your head to avoid his gaze.

"You worry about me?" Loki asked as he looked at you. You took a deep breath and sighed.

"Yes. Is it a crime?" You let out as you blushed. Loki took your hand and guided you to his bed where he sat and invited you to do the same.

"Tell me cookie... About you." He said.

"What do you mean about me?" You asked.

"I don't really know things about you. I mean, personal you. I want to know about what you like, what you dislike, your past, everything." You were confused but you smiled at him, that was an odd request.

"I guess I can tell you a few things." You replied. "Wait, let's play a game. You ask me a question and I reply truthfully and then I do the same. Deal?"

"Aren't you afraid I'm gonna ask you what you're hiding?"

"I trust you." You reminded him. His heart missed a beat, you had to stop doing that to him.

"Fine. I'll play your game." He replied, amused.

"Okay, I'll let you start." Loki took a few seconds to think before asking.

"Why do you like watching horror movies if you react so badly to them?" You let out a little giggle at the question, you didn't expect it.

"I love when movies make me feel things, I love the adrenaline of getting scared. Sometimes I get jumpscared but then I laugh at my reaction. I have a good time when I watch them." You replied with honesty.

"Alright, that's _weird_ but I accept your answer." Loki commented. "It's your turn." There is something you always wanted to ask him.

"Why did you never make fun of my appearance?" You asked.

"What is there to make fun of?" He asked and he really looked like he had no idea what you meant.

"C'mon, I'm... big and not pretty like the other women." You said.

"And that is a reason to mock you?"

"It was for the people I met all my life." You said.

"Were those people immature children? To reply to your first question, you look normal to me and I have no reasons to make fun of your appearance. Now, my turn. Tell me about these people." Loki said as he stared into your eyes. You took a deep breath.

"Fine, I'll take that opportunity to tell you about my past too." You proceeded to tell him the same thing you told the Avengers on the truth or dare game but carefully avoided the part about your powers. Loki listened to you without interrupting once and the expression on his face stayed neutral. You felt relaxed around him and you didn't cry this time when you narrated your story to the God of mischief. When you were finally done he approached you and put a gentle hand against your cheek, you raised your head to stare into his eyes but you couldn't read them. You didn't know what he was thinking.

"Would you tell me where this village is?" Loki asked in a quiet voice.

"I could, but why do you want to know?" You asked.

"I would like to get rid of all the people who wronged you." He simply said and brought his hand back to himself. Your eyes widened.

"No! Oh my God, are you crazy?" You asked a bit shocked but then you started giggling. Loki stared at you in confusion and you explained. "It's just funny. Thor said something similar when I told the Avengers about my past."

"I admire you, cookie." Loki said. This time you're the one who looked at him with a confused expression. "You have been through a terrible and unfair treatment and yet I've never met someone as kinder as you." He said. "You can trust that if it were me I would've done a massacre." You smiled at that even though none of it was funny and Loki was probably not joking.

"Well, first of all I'm not a God so even if I wanted to it's not like I could've done something." You said. "I did what I do best. Run away." Your lips curved into a sad smile. Loki's heart ached, he had fallen too deep and he realized it. He wanted to do everything in his power to protect you from now on so you would've never have to suffer ever again. You didn't deserve any of it, not after showing him how kind you were and especially to someone like him.

"Come." He said. You didn't understand but then you saw him move on his bed and proceeded to lay on it and invited you to join him.

"Is it a good idea?" You asked him but God knows you were asking yourself too.

"I will not do anything to you." Loki reassured you. And you trusted him, _again_. You climbed on the bed next to him and the God of mischief brought you against his torso. You wrapped your arm around his waist and rested your head on his chest. Loki gently caressed your hair while his other hand grabbed yours that were resting on his stomach. "You've never had someone before Bucky, right?" He asked you. You kept quiet for a little moment but finally spoke.

"No..." You replied. "You and him are the only people who showed-" You paused. "- _Interest_ in me..." You continued. "You're the only ones, the only two people I ever got really close to." You smiled slightly. "I still don't understand why to be really honest. You both could do so much better."

"It's a little bit funny how you can somehow see something in me and Bucky, despite what we've done- And I know about it, but you, who'se never harmed think you're so worthless." Loki said as he tangled his fingers with yours. You bit onto your lower lip.

"But I'm-" He knew where you were going with this.

"Do you think appearance and beauty is everything, cookie? Did you get feelings for me and Bucky because of our physical traits?" He asked you seriously as he turned his head to look at your face.

"N-No..." You replied.

"I understand you have been showed this false image about the world during all your living years but it is what is it, false. There is so much more that matters and you, dear, are definitively worthy." Loki stared into your eyes as he spoke those reassuring words to you. Your heart beat fast inside your chest, you really appreciated what he said and you believed him. You closed your eyes and brushed your lips against his. Loki let out a little surprised hum against your mouth but soon enough he kissed you back. "I thought you didn't want to kiss me anymore." The God of mischief smirked against your lips.

"Shut up." You replied before kissing him again. Loki let go of your hand and put both of his on each side of your face to kiss you deeper. You moved on the bed and proceeded to go on your fours above him. You straddled his hips and leaned to keep kissing him, you supported your weight by placing your hands on his shoulders. Loki unconsciously moved his hips against yours and you let out an accidental moan against his mouth.

"Have you-" Loki breathed against your lips. You understood what he asked.

"No." You replied. "And we're not going to." He catched your lips with his again. Loki put his hands on your waist and inversed your positions very easily, you didn't expect him to have so much strength. Maybe you were indeed underestimating him.

"Why not?" He asked as he moved between your legs before kissing you some more.

"Not until I make my decision." You said as you pulled back for air.

"Then choose me." Loki said as he stared into your eyes. You smiled as you stared back at him and put a hand against his cheek..

"It's getting late, I should go back to my room." You told him.

"Yes, you should." Loki smirked before kissing you again.

"Loki..." You said against his lips.

"Yes, cookie?" He replied with mischievous eyes.

"I have to go." You put your hands against his chest. Loki sighed before moving off you. He got up from the bed and gave you his hand to help you. "Thank you."

"Please, do visit me again." The God of mischief winked and you rolled your eyes.

"Goodnight, Loki." You said as you approached him and put a kiss on his cheek.

"Goodnight." He said as he opened the door for you.

  
  


\---

  
  


God, what were you doing? When you were alone in the elevator you thought about how close you became to Loki then you thought about your afternoon with Bucky and how happy it made you that weren't mad at him anymore. But guilt quickly invaded your mind. You were kissing another man behind the winter soldier's back. You and Bucky were back to square one but this still didn't make you feel good about yourself. What were you supposed to do then? Tell him and break his heart? He would be so disappointed in you and it scared you that you might lose him. Then again you thought about Loki again and you didn't want to break his heart either. The winter soldier and the God of mischief didn't deserve to suffer anymore, you hated that you let the situation escalate this badly.

You were going to your floor but suddenly the elevator stopped and when the doors opened your heart tightened in your chest. Bucky was the one waiting on the other side. You both's eyes widened before he stepped in. You didn't say anything to each other and this was awkward as fuck. You were feeling bad because of what you had been doing until now and Bucky didn't know what to say to you after he learned you and Loki teleported God knows where to spend time together. And the fact that you didn't spend the night with him or the other Avengers and now he found you in the elevator, he knew what that meant. You were with the Asgardian again.

The elevator finally stopped at your floor and as both of you were about to step out you accidentally bumped into each other.

"S-Sorry." You stuttered.

"It's me. Please, go." Bucky took a step back to let you walk out first. You lowered your head and stepped out in quick steps. You were about to reach your room when suddenly he called you. "Doll?" You turned around.

"Yes?"

"Do... Do you wanna come in for a minute?" He gestured to his door. You bit onto your lower lip as you considered his request.

"O-Okay." You accepted. You turned back on your feet and followed him inside his room. You looked around as if it was the first time you walked in there. It has been a long time though.

"Sit." Bucky told you as he moved towards his bed. You both sat on the edge and you could tell you were both nervous. Then Bucky's had enough of fidgeting around, he had to ask now. "You were with him, right?" You nodded as you lowered your head and faced forward to not look at him. The winter soldier sighed before speaking again. "Please tell me the truth doll... How do you feel about him?" That's it, he asked and you couldn't lie to him.

"I-I have feelings for him." You confessed. Bucky got up and took a few steps in the room as he passed a hand on his face.

"How do you feel about me?" He asked.

"I have feelings for you too." You let out. Bucky breathed deeply.

"How... How did this happen, doll?" He asked you as he came back to sit on the bed.

"I-I don't know, it all escalated very quickly." You started. "Before the party I-I..." You paused. "I was ready, Bucky. Remember when we were in my room and then Nat interrupted? I-If we had just a little more time I think I-I would've... you know." You said as you kept looking down. "And then... While I was mad at you Loki was comforting me, he was nice with me all the time and I-I don't know how... I-I didn't decide it... We spent time together and I realized I felt something for him too..." You explained.

"Does he feel the same?" Bucky asked.

"H-He told me he did... And I believe him." You let out. "I-I'm really sorry Bucky, I have feelings for you both and I don't know what to do. I-I don't want to hurt any of you." You said as you started crying. "I-I feel like I'm manipulating you both and I hate myself. I-I've never been loved before, I don't know how I'm supposed to face this situation."

"You have feelings for me?" The winter soldier asked as he looked into your face with a small smile.

"Of couse I do, you idiot!" You let out as you raised your head to look at him.

"You know I really thought you were going to tell me you were going to leave with Loki because you loved him." Your eyes widened.

"What? No! That's not the case at all." You said.

"So." He took a deep breath. "If I get this right you have feelings for both me and him?" He asked and you nodded as you wiped your tears. "So what happens now?" Bucky asked.

"I-I need time to think, I don't want to play with you both. I have to take a decision." You said to him.

"How far have you gone with him?" He asked you with a serious gaze this time.

"W-We... We kissed." You let out.

"That's it?" He asked. You nodded again. Bucky took a deep breath and then let it out. "I guess I can't really get mad at you for it after what I've done huh?"

"You can, I'd understand." You said. "You both deserve better than someone like me." Bucky came closer to you and put his arm around your shoulders.

"How about this?" He said as he glanced at your lips. "I'll let it slide if you kiss me." You turned your head to look at him.

"Y-You're not mad?" You asked.

"I made a mistake too." He simply said. "And I've been waiting to do it since we were at the beach." Oh, fuck. You hesitated for a short time but then when you saw the way he looked at you, you couldn't help it. You really missed him too and you wanted to do it.

"Okay." You finally agreed. Bucky brought his hand behind your head and then leaned on you. He gently brushed his lips against yours as he held your head in place. You parted your lips and kissed him passionately. Your heart beat faster and butterflies fluttered inside your stomach. You _really_ missed this.

"My doll, how I've missed you." He said against your lips. You smiled as you shifted on the bed and wrapped your arms around his neck.

"I missed you too, Bucky." Your fingers played with the strands of hair at the base of his nape as you kissed him. "I'm really sorry." You said as you pulled back for air.

"Shh. I don't care about anything as long as you're against me." Bucky said. "Do you want to stay here?" He asked. You let out a sigh.

"I-I don't think it's a good idea." You told him. "It's very late I'm gonna go to sleep."

"You can sleep here." He teased.

"Bucky..." You rolled your eyes. You leaned on him and gave him one last kiss. "Goodnight." You said as you walked to the door.

"Dream about me, doll." He winked.

"I'll be sure to do that." You joked as you finally got out and closed the door of his room behind you.

 


	20. Promises

You slept so badly. All night guilt had been consuming you. Even if Bucky and Loki didn't seem to mind you knew that what you were doing was wrong and you were not okay with it. The only thing you were sure about now was that you liked both of them and they liked **you**. You passed your hands on your face before getting up and heading to the bathroom. You had to be prepared for the day and you also had to see Tony, you couldn't stand the idea of him being mad at you longer. He was like the father you never had and you hated worrying him.

After washing your body and brushing your teeth you picked up your clothes and put them on before walking out of your room. As always you had no idea if Bucky was already awake when you walked past his room, you pressed on the elevator button and then went to the kitchen.

"Good morning." You announced as you entered the room. You glanced towards the table and saw that a few members were there already along with Bucky _and_ Loki. Your eyes widened when suddenly the two of them got up when you walked in the kitchen. What the fuck were they doing again? Nat, Steve and Thor looked at them with furrowed brows, they looked as confused as you.

"Good morning, doll." Bucky said as he approached you and put a kiss on your cheek. "Do you want me to pour you a glass of milk?" He asked.

"Good morning, cookie." This time Loki came towards you too and also put a kiss on your other cheek. "I'll get you your favorite cereals."

Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, this was absolutely not happening right now.

"I'm begging you both to please sit down, you're embarrassing me." You said to them in a quiet voice to not be heard by the others. You knew your face was becoming red as the Avengers members in the room had their eyes locked on the scene. You wanted to disappear.

"What is going on?" Nat mouthed to Steve and Thor discreetly. The winter soldier and the God of mischief listened to you and went back to their seats around the table. You poured yourself a bowl of cereal and then joined everyone. Unfortunately the only empty seat left was between your two love interests so you had no choice but to sit there.

"Have you slept well?" Steve asked you.

"N-Not really." You replied but you weren't going to tell everyone why. "Is Tony already up? I-I want to talk to him." You said to Steve.

"I don't know [Y/N], I haven't seen him yet." He looked at you with a comforting expression. You lowered your head. You were worried, you hated being in conflict with people and especially those you appreciated. "Don't worry, I'm sure it will get solved soon. Tony calms down as quickly as he gets upset."

"I hope so, thank you." You shyly smiled at the Captain. You were about to dig into your cereals but with _the two_ distracting you earlier you forgot to take an ustensil. "I forgot my spoon." You shaked your head because of your clumsiness.

"I'll get it for you." Bucky said as he got up immediately.

"You can use mine, cookie. I didn't touch it." Loki put it next to your bowl. You held your head between your hands as you rested your elbows on the table.

"What are you doing?" Thor asked to his brother.

"What?" Loki looked at the other Asgardian as if he had no idea what he was talking about. Bucky came back and handed you a spoon. Steve crossed eyes with him and gave him a questioning look.

"Oh my God, you both fancy her." Nat suddenly let out and you really wished you could teleport too at the moment. Steve and Thor's eyes widened as if it hit them too. What you hated the most is that they stayed **silent** , the both of them, which just gave confirmation to the redhaired woman. Bucky and Loki crossed eyes and glared at each other while you were hoping really hard you were still sleeping and this was actually just a bad dream. You pinched your thigh under the table but nope, this was indeed real and happening.

"I'm going back to bed." You said as you got up and walked out quickly.

  
  


\---

  
  


After you left the kitchen you asked the AI if Tony was awake and she told you that he was in his lab so you decided to go talk with him. You took a deep breath when you arrived in front of the glass door, he was alone which was perfect. You knocked on the door and Tony raised his head from his work and crossed eyes with you. You saw him put down his tools before he gestured you to come in.

"H-Hey..." You greeted him shyly.

"Hi, [Y/N]." He said back.

"T-Tony-" Tears already appeard in the corner of your eyes. "I-I'm sorry for yesterday, I swear I didn't think about the consequences, it was never my attention to have you all worried because of me." You apologized to him. "I-I know I sounded aggressive but I panicked when Thor jumped on Loki, he had really done nothing this time. I don't want you to be mad at me anymore, you're-" You paused to take your breath again, you were talking so fast. "You're like a father to me and I'm thankful for everything you did for me since I live her." You sobbed. Tony wrapped his arms around you and hugged you.

"It's fine, it's in the past." He reassured you. He put a kiss on top of your head before releasing you. Your words moved him. "I care about you [Y/N] and I consider you like my daughter too. I really thought it was over when you disappeard with Loki."

"I'm really sorry." You repeated and wiped your tears. "How did you know I was gone by the way?" You asked.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. has eyes on Loki so if he disappears from the tower we get warned about it. We all panicked when the announcement said you disappeard along with him." Tony explained.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know."

"I know. You're well and it's all that matters." He smiled at you. You sighed out of relief and sat on a chair next to his.

"I know you probably don't want to hear this right now but I didn't lie yesterday." You raised your head to look at him. "When we came back and noticed the tower was on alert Loki and I took the stairs to join with you all in case we were under attack or something and when we reached the entrance, Loki walked in front of me and ordered me to stay behind him." You narrated. "He doesn't know about my powers and I don't even think he knew about the suit." Loki was there during the party but you rememberd he disappeard before Tony's show.

"Don't you think he could be manipulating you?" Tony asked after he let out a sigh. "You know, try to become your friend and get your trust so you can reveal him your secret?" You didn't hesitate, you were determined in your reply.

"No, I really believe him." You told Tony. "You know when I was-" You paused. "When I was living alone out there and I used to heal people in exchange of money or food, I ran into malicious people who tried to take advantage of me. And some of their plans were really well thought and I did get fooled once or twice but they always-" You thought back of those times. "I always had a bad feeling about them. Maybe I am being naive but I never felt that with Loki. I don't think he's lying to me." Tony stared into your eyes and understood what you were telling him but he couldn't help worrying, after all he only knew Loki for his crimes, he didn't spend time with him like you did so you understood his side too. "What I'm trying to tell you Tony is that- I trust Loki." You revealed to him.

"I really hope you don't regret that choice [Y/N]." Tony said.

"And I plan on making you all change your mind about him." You looked Tony in the eyes to show him you were not joking.

"[Y/N], he's killed pe-"

"Haven't you all in this tower?" You asked firmly. Tony's eyes widened, he looked shocked. "I'm not underestimating him or justificating his crimes, I'm asking you all to give him a chance at redemption. Let him fix his mistakes. You all have been forgiven because today you're heroes and you defend people, I know Loki deserves a second chance too." Tony stared into your eyes but he stayed silent.

"I'm not gonna lie, you're starting to make sense and I _hate_ it." He said to you and you smiled at him. "You know that I'm gonna put him under your responsibility right? And if he fucks up that's on you?"

"Tony you can be sure that if he fucks up I'll be the first one to kick his ass and then Thor will probably give me a hand at it too." You assured him.

"Fine." He gave up. "You and Loki will both join us in the next training." You jumped in Tony's arms to hug him.

"Thank you so much, I promise you you won't regret it!" You grinned.

"Alright, alright. Now get out of here I got work to do."

"You're the best!" You threw at him before walking out.

"I **am** the best, that's true." Tony said with pride as he picked up his tools again.

  
  


\---

  
  


You were relieved and reinvigorated after your talk with Tony so you went back in the kitchen because you were starving now. You were literally so happy you even hummed on your way there. You couldn't wait to tell Loki about the good news. Even if you didn't talk about your plan with him you knew he would make all the efforts to redeem himself.

When you arrived in the kitchen it was empty but it didn't surprise you, it's been a while since you were up now and everyone had eaten already. You grabbed a package of cookies and poured yourself a glass of milk before sitting in front of the counter. You had a huge grin on your face the whole time you were eating. You couldn't wait to see the look on the God of mischief's face when you would reveal to him that he was about to basically become an Avengers trainee like you were not too long ago. That made you really happy for Loki, he deserved this.

After you were done eating you decided to search for the Asgardian to announce him the good news though you were too lazy to search the whole tower so you asked F.R.I.D.A.Y. about his location.

"He's in the library, miss." You raised one eyebrow. The library? Okay, Loki just scored new points with you. You took the elevator and headed for the specific floor. You walked through the hallway that guided to the library and found him there. The God of mischief was sitting on a chair and he had a book between his hands though you didn't care about what he was reading at the moment.

"Hey." You announced yourself. Loki raised his head towards the voice and smiled when he recognized you.

"Cookie." He greeted you in a soft voice. "What are you doing here?" He asked you.

"I was looking for you." You answered.

"Were you?" Loki raised one eyebrow.

"Hmm." You confirmed as you nodded and took a few steps towards him. "I have some good news for you." You teased him.

"Don't tell me you've made your decision..?" You rolled your eyes with a little smile.

"No, it's not about that. But I think what I'm going to announce you is gonna make you happy too." He stood up but you gestured him to keep sitting down. "No, I think you're gonna need that chair." You giggled.

"Well go on cookie, you're gonna give me a heart attack otherwise."

"Tony said you and I could come to one of their trainings!" You announced happily. Loki's eyes widened.

"What?" He asked in confusion.

"Remember when I told you I'd make the Avengers change their opinions on you?" It was after you defended him against everyone. He nodded. How could he not remember what you did for him? "Well I persuaded Tony that you aren't a bad person and that you too, could get a second chance." You smiled at him. "And Tony accepted!" Loki was baffled. He couldn't believe it.

"Is the secret you're hiding from me the power to control minds? Because I have a hard time believing he accepted." You let out a little laugh.

"Nope! Guess I'm just lucky Tony is a smart guy and he listened to my arguments." You grinned out of happiness. Suddenly the God of mischief wrapped his arms around your waist and brought you on him. You almost slipped and let out a little surprised gasp but thankfully you catched yourself on his lap. Your hands rested on his shoulders for support.

"I-I..." The Asgardian found himself speechless. He stared into your eyes with love, it was like if he was looking at the most precious jewel he ever laid eyes on. Loki couldn't believe someone could do so much for him.

"I'm really happy for you, Loki." You said to him. "That doesn't mean it's going to be easy though. For now only Tony knows and he told me I'd be _responsible_ for you." You giggled. "So you better work hard and not make me regret going against Tony." Loki tightened his grasp on you and glanced at your lips, he wanted you so badly.

"I promise you [Y/N]-" He called you by your name and you couldn't help your lips curving into a small smile as you stared into his eyes with happiness. "I will do everything to never disappoint you, everything to protect you and everything to always make you happy." Your heart raced in your chest and your stomach did backflips. You felt like crying but you held your tears back. One of your hands gently went to his cheek and then traveled to his ear to replace a strand of his beautiful black hair behind it. Loki leaned on you and put his lips against yours. One of his arms was wrapped around your waist and the other went up, he gently held your head with his hand as he kissed you passionately. You kissed him back because you couldn't help it, you felt something for the God of mischief and he was indeed an incredible kisser. When his mouth met yours it's as if time stopped and nothing around you existed, you were the only two people on Earth.

"I guess no matter how many times I ask you to stop kissing me you never will huh?" You asked with a shy smile as you blushed.

"You didn't give me the impression you truly wanted to stop." Loki smirked. And he was right, you didn't.

"C'mon, I gotta go." You said as you proceeded to get up but the Asgardian kept holding you against him.

"Is there somewhere you have to be?" He asked you as he raised one eyebrow.

"N-No..." You replied.

"Then you can keep staying here with me." Oh God, there it was. His mischievous expression again.

"Loki..." You sighed. "What if someone sees us?"

"Have you ever met someone else in this library?"

"How do you know no one else comes here?" You asked.

"Why do you think I decided to spend time here? I know no one comes in besides you." You rolled your eyes as you smiled.

"S-Still, it's not ri-" You were interrupted by him kissing you again. Loki's had enough of you repeating that because he knew it was just an excuse. You wanted to kiss him just as much as he wanted to kiss you. You moaned against the kiss and he took the opportunity of your parted lips to put his tongue in your mouth. He played with you until you both pulled back for air.

"I really like you cookie." He breathed against your lips with a smirk.

"And I hate you." You replied falsely offended.

"You wound me." Loki chuckled.

"C'mon, enough with the play. Why don't you tell me about what you were reading?"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bucky better get to work quickly or Loki will steal her away from him...


	21. Pretext

You and Loki stayed in the library until it was time to have lunch. You could tell he felt lighter with the good news you brought him and you liked seeing him being positive and happy in general. You decided to head to the kitchen together and there you found all the Avengers.

"Hey." You announced your presence with a smile.

"Hi, again." Steve replied to you. "You seem to be better than how you were this morning."

"I am." You replied as you crossed eyes with Tony who smiled at you. "Are we late?"

"Just in time." Thor replied. Loki grabbed yours and his plates and ustensils before you gently took his arm and guided him to sit around the table with everyone else.

"Where were you both?" Nat asked.

"In the library." You replied.

"I didn't even know this place had one." Thor frowned.

"I'd be surprised if you can read at all." Loki mocked and you had to hold back a laugh.

"Don't be mean." You whispered to him and in response he smiled at you. You turned your head and you crossed eyes with Bucky. For a second you didn't know how you were supposed to react but then you naturally just smiled at him and he smiled back at you which relieved you.

"Did you guys know the theme park is open this weekend? Do you wanna check it out tonight?" Nat asked. Your eyes started shining. You had never been to an amusement park before, you always saw other people talk about it or go with their friends, you really wanted to go. Bucky didn't miss the way your eyes shined.

"I'm in." He said. You smiled as you looked at him.

"Yeah, I think it's a good idea." Steve added.

"[Y/N], you're coming?" Nat asked you. You nodded happily.

"I pass, Pepper finally found a moment in her schedule to remember me." Tony said.

"Yeah, I think I'll pass too." Bruce said.

"What, you're too old?" Thor teased him.

"Well, I guess that's the six of us." Nat said. "At the parking lot at 6pm, alright?"

"You're coming, right?" You turned to Loki.

"Everywhere you go I shall follow you." You bit onto your lower lip as you blushed slightly and lowered your head with a small smile.

  
  


After that you all digged into your foods and when you were done you retreated to your room. There was still plenty of time left before the night. You were chilling on your bed for a little hour when suddenly there was a knock at your door. You didn't expect anyone so it surprised you. You got up anyway and opened the door, there you found the winter soldier.

"Oh, hey Bucky." You smiled.

"Doll." He winked at you with a little smile and it made your heart skip a beat. You forgot he could do that. "I was about to do some training on my own and I wondered if you'd be interested in joining me?" He asked.

Seriously? You and sports? It really must've been a long time since you hang out with Bucky if he had forgotten what you looked like and you and physical activity weren't a good match.

"I-I... Why me?" You felt so stupid asking that question. "Y-You probably know I'm not good at... that." You said.

"You're really gonna make me say it huh?" He asked with a low chuckle.

"Say what?" You asked in confusion.

"Doll, I don't care about training, I just wanna spend some time with you."

"O-Oh..." You lowered your head in shame as you let out a small laugh. "I told you I was stupid." You joked. Bucky rolled his eyes.

"C'mon, change your clothes and come with me." Bucky smiled at you.

"Alright." You accepted. Five minutes later you joined him in the elevator and he guided you to the training room. It was very large and had all kinds of machines and tools. "I literally never came here." You confessed which made Bucky laugh.

"Well if you ever want to, come get me." He said.

"I doubt it but I will get you for some other things." You said.

"Really? What things?" Bucky asked as he raised one eyebrow.

"Stuff that don't require physical activity?" You said.

"I hope there's a least one kind of physical activity you'd want to do with me." He teased. Your jaw dropped.

"Buck!" You hit his arm as you blushed profusely. Bucky laughed next to you. You couldn't believe he just said that.

"I noticed it's funny how you usually call me Bucky but when you're upset you say Buck." He looked at you with a tender smile.

"R-Really?" You haven't even noticed. "A-Anyway... What are you gonna make me do in the torture room?" You asked which made him laugh again. God, you really loved hearing him laugh.

"We'll start slowly by warming up and stretching." He grabbed two fitness mats from a shelf and laid them on the floor.

"Okay, that doesn't sound too hard." You said.

"Take off your shoes, get on your mat and imitate what I do." He ordered you with a nice and friendly tone, you felt good with him. Bucky showed you some classic warm up exercises and you were doing good so far.

"You know you deserve a reward for being the first person to convince me to exercise." You said to him with a playful smile as you were both laying on your respective mats.

"Really?" The winter soldier wondered with a smirk. Uh oh, what was he thinking of?

"You're scaring me when you're making that expression Bucky."

"There might be a reward I would be interested in." He said.

"Hit me with your best shot." You challenged.

"Kiss me." Here we go again. Though you didn't chicken out and walked over to his mat before leaning on his face and putting a kiss against his lips then you went back to your mat.

"What's the next move?" You asked.

"I don't know? I kiss-" He started.

"I meant the training, Bucky."

"Oh, yeah. The training." He shaked his head. "Of course. How about some pushups?"

"Sounds tiring..." You whined. "How about **you** do them and I count?" You smirked playfully. Bucky couldn't resist when you looked at him like that.

"Fine." The winter soldier agreed. Then he proceeded to lay on the ground and started doing his pushups while you counted. It lasted for a little while but you didn't mind staring at him, he did look very hot while he was working out.

"Bucky, you reached two hundred, I'm worried for you." He had to stop as he let out a chuckle.

"This is the most unproductive I've ever been." He said as he got up.

"Hey, you're the one who invited me." You reminded him. "And I thought this was a pretext to see me." You joked.

"I've been too easy on you, doll. Lay on your mat." You were confused but did as he said.

"Alright, so far so good." You joked. Bucky approached you and touched your legs to bend them. Then he came in front of you and wrapped his hands around your ankles.

"You're gonna do abs." He said. You let out a laugh.

"Are you joking?"

"Does it look like I am?" He asked you.

"Well you must be, you know I can't do abs."

"Not with that attitude that's for sure. C'mon, it's easier if I hold your legs." Bucky encouraged you.

"Why don't you do th- Buck!" You burst out laughing after he's had enough of your complaining so he raised one of your legs and started tickling the sole of your foot. "P-Please, stop!" You squirmed in front of him and shaked your legs to escape the winter soldier's grasp.

"Did you know that by laughing you can burn calories too?" He teased you as he kept tickling you.

"Bucky, I-I can't breathe!" You couldn't stop laughing and tears started appearing in the corner of your eyes. Suddenly he let go of your foot and put his hands on your knees to spread your legs, he sticked his body against yours and leaned on you. You stopped laughing and stared into his eyes with a blush appearing on your face, he towered above you and placed his palms on your mat next to each side of your head. He was sweaty and his musky fragrence reached your nose but you didn't mind. His face got so close to yours the tip of his long brown locks were tickling your cheeks. You could only hear the pounding of your heart inside your chest as your stomach did backflips, suddenly you felt oh so very hot and you only wanted to feel Bucky against you. One of your hands slowly crept behind his head as your other rested on the side of his torso.

"Doll..." He whispered as he stared back into your eyes.

"Kiss me." You asked him. And he did. Bucky finally closed the gap between you two's faces and kissed you passionately. You guided the hand that was behind his head to his cheek and caressed it as you kissed him back deeply. Bucky was grinding his hips against yours and you felt hot between your legs, he's the only one who ever made you feel that. Your hand that rested on his side went under his tank top and you caressed the skin there. You felt Bucky's muscles contract under your touch and you smiled against his lips. Bucky broke the kiss to pull back for air and when he leaned back he decided to take off the sweaty material. Your eyes widened and you blushed harder but you didn't have time to protest or say anything as he leaned back on you and catched your mouth with his again.

"Touch me, doll-" He breathed against your lips before taking your hands in his and putting them against his chest. His skin felt burning on your palms as you traveled your hands on his pecs, abs and sides. Bucky gripped one of your thighs and spread it a bit more as he rubbed his clothed crotch against yours. You moaned against his kiss and when you felt him guide his hand between your legs. It was too much, you had to stop.

"B-Bucky!" You gasped a bit panicked. "P-Please, it's not the time." You said with an apologetic look in your eyes as he went to your neck and kissed you there. He let go of your legs and brought his palms back to the mat to help him support his weight to tower you. He put a kiss on your forehead before getting up. "I'm sorry..." You said as you took a sitting position and lowered your gaze.

"It's okay, doll." He smiled at you and ruffled your hair. Bucky gave you his hands and you took them to get back up on your feet. You wrapped your arms around the winter soldier and hugged him. You hated how scared you were of what could happen if you took the next step with him and you also feared his reaction when he'd see and touch your body. Bucky was perfect and you were not. He deserved better in your opinion. Suddenly Bucky got you out of your reverie as he put a finger under your chin and made you raise your head to look at him. "What are you thinking about in that pretty head of yours?" He asked with reassurance.

"Nothing you need to worry about." You replied with a sigh.

"Are you sure?" He sensed the hesitation in your voice.

"Hmm." You nodded. Bucky leaned and put a kiss on your lips before smiling at you. You blushed and let go of him.

"Would you join me for a shower?" He winked with a smirk.

"B-Buck!" You gasped.

"I'm sure you would love it." He continued with a grin.

"I-I'm gonna take a shower on my own in my room and then get ready for tonight." You said to him as you picked up your mats and put them away on the shelf.

"Can I at least escort you on your way there?"

"Bucky, we live on the same floor." You reminded him as you smiled anyway at his annoying play. He picked up his tank top that rested on the floor and then joined you before heading to the elevator.

"I can't wait to spend the evening with you." Bucky said to you after the elevator doors closed. You turned your head to smile at him. "I saw how excited you looked when Nat mentioned the theme park."

"I've never been there. I walked by and saw all the colorful neon lights, heard people laughing and the smell of the different treats reached my nose, it seems like a paradise. I'm happy I get to go with you all and especially with you." Bucky took your hand and brought it to his lips like he used to do before everything that's happened and you felt your stomach do a backflip.

"I promise you I'm gonna make you have a great time." He stared into your eyes with a tender smile. You took a few steps towards him and wrapped your hands around his neck as you giggled happily. Bucky hugged you tightly against him before releasing you, you had reached your floor and the elevator doors opened. "This time I'll come get you in one hour, doll. I'm never leaving you alone again." He said as you both stepped out.

"Alright. One hour it is." You promised him before grabbing your doorknob and entering your room.

  
  


\---

  
  


You were so conflicted. You sat in front of your wardrobe for ten minutes unsure of what to wear. For the first time you wanted to wear something else than dark leggings and oversized hoodies, you wanted to look pretty. You did possess some cute outfits but you never went out with them, you were too scared of getting weird looks and comments. Though this time it was different, you weren't alone anymore and you trusted all of your new friends. You took a deep breath and decided to stop thinking too hard about this. It was just clothes. You grabbed a black pleated mini skirt and a white top that you put on immediately. You fixed the necklace that Bucky offered you around your neck and then put on your shoes. You checked yourself in the mirror and you liked what you saw. You weren't used to these kind of outfits but this time you gathered your courage and decided to not change. You quickly stepped back inside the bathroom to fix your hair and face, you knew Bucky would knock on your door at any minute now. And speaking about the devil, that's when he did.

"Come in!" You shouted from the bathroom.

"Hey, it's me." Bucky announced as he stepped in. "Where are you?" He asked as he couldn't see you.

"The bathroom. Just a minute." You replied. You stepped out and saw he was seated on the edge of your bed. When he saw you he got up but then you saw his eyes widen when he took a better look at your outfit.

"Doll- Wow." Bucky let out with a smile. "Y-You're beautiful." He catched himself stuttering and it surprised him. At your sight his heart started beating faster.

"Thank you." You replied shyly with a little smile. The winter soldier handed you his hand and you happily took it.

"Let's go, the others are probably already waiting." He said to you as he opened your door.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapters: the theme park!


	22. Theme park

When you reached the parking lot with Bucky and stepped out of the elevator you saw the team waiting next to a van. Of course all six of you couldn't fit inside a normal car.

"There they are." Nat announced.

"Hop in, gang." Steve said as he opened the door on the driver's side.

"Hi." You greeted Loki discreetly while everyone was getting in the van.

"Hello, cookie." He greeted you back with his usual piercing and hypnotizing gaze. "You look stunning." He complimented you with a smirk.

"Thank you." You replied with a little blush.

In the car Bucky sat next to Steve, the two Asgardians Gods went in the back of the van and you sat next to Natasha in the middle. The captain started the car and then you were on your way to the theme park.

"So [Y/N], what's your favorite ride?" Nat asked you. You started blushing.

"I-I don't know actually, I never went to a theme park." You replied.

"What, really?" She raised one eyebrow. "This shall be fun then." She added with a playful smile. "I hope you're not afraid of heights."

"I doubt I am since I can stand in front of the glass wall in the tower without feeling sick." You joked and they all let out a little laugh.

"Yeah, I guess that's true." Steve added, his eyes stayed on the road. "Wait, you like horror right?" He asked after he rememberd something. He glanced at Nat through the rearview mirror.

"Oh, I'm indeed thinking of what you're thinking Steve." She winked at him.

"What are you both scheming?" You asked.

"You'll see soon." And then Nat kept silent.

You continued talking about trivial matters during the car ride until you finally reached the theme park. You could already hear the loud music, children laughing and people screaming on the rollercoasters. You were very excited. You got out of the car and then the six of you entered the park.

"Wait for me here, I'll grab our tickets." Steve said before walking towards the ticket office.

"So what do you guys wanna try first?" Nat asked.

"I don't know? I'm counting on you all to guide me to be honest." You said.

"How about that over there?" Thor pointed to a ride.

"Really? The drop tower? Right off the bat?" Nat asked.

"What does it do?" You asked.

"So you take a seat and it brings you very high up and then it suddenly drops." She explained and your eyes widened.

"I-Isn't that dangerous?" You stuttered.

"Only after you've eaten I guess." She shrugged. "Actually you're right Thor, we should do it first." You weren't that reassured.

"You guys in?" You asked Bucky and Loki when you turned to face them.

"Well, someone _has_ to look after you." Loki teased. "And I can actually save your life if something happens."

"You're not reassuring me Loki." You said with a low voice.

"If you don't wanna do it I'll stay with you, doll." Bucky added.

"No, c'mon, we have to! I don't wanna chicken out for my first ride already." You said determined and they both smiled at you. Steve came back and gave a ticket to each person of the gang.

"We've decided to do the drop tower first." Nat announced to Steve.

"Well, thanks God, I haven't eaten yet." He said.

You all walked towards the line of the amusement ride thankfully it wasn't too crowded and your turn came quickly. The six of you fit in one row which was cool, you wouldn't be separated from your friends and that reassured you. You got a little more stressed when you stood in front of the ride and raised your head, it was really tall. From right to left you sat in this order: Thor, Loki, you, Bucky, Nat and Steve. The security fencing lowered and you started getting _**really**_ nervous.

"You guys realize this might be the last time we talk to each other?" You let out a little scared and you heard them burst out laughing.

"Doll, you're so adorable." Bucky said with a grin as he turned his head to look at you.

"I don't see what's adorable about me fearing for our lives." You said as you rolled your eyes. Then suddenly the ride started going up and you let out a little surprised gasp.

"I can't wait til she tries the other rides." Nat said to Steve.

"That if I make it alive from this one." You said after you heard her. "Oh, God, we're really high now." You said as you faced forward.

"Thought you weren't afraid of heights." Loki said to you.

"Yeah, well, the tower actually protects me. Here I only have this fence that will probably break under my weight." You said not reassured at all.

"I thought I told you cookie, I won't let anything happen to you." Fuck, the smooth idiot. You started blushing. The ride stopped going up and you panicked.

"Is this normal??" You asked.

"Yeah, it means it's gonna drop soon." Steve said to you. Your eyes widened and you quickly grabbed Loki and Bucky's hands who rested next to yours for security.

"Cookie, it will be fine." Loki tried to reassure you.

"S-Shut up, j-just don't let go of my hand yet."

"Doll, are you gonna be okay?" Bucky worried when he saw your terrified expression.

"Y-Yeah, it's just- I'm not very patient and this is taking forever to happen. Please I'm begging you both don't let go yet." You pleaded them. Suddenly you heard chuckles and you gasped when you noticed it was coming from both of them. "Are you really making fun of me??"

"How can they not?" Nat said as she held back a laugh too.

"You've never been this talkative before." Thor noticed.

"Alright, I see. Since I've become the clown of this group apparently-" You started a little upset. "I will shut- AAAAAAAAAH!!" At long last for you, but especially your teammates, the ride finally started. Your heart and stomach ached in your torso as you screamed, you've never felt this before. It was the scariest thing you've ever experienced. You were pretty sure you crushed Bucky and Loki's hands in yours but you were too busy screaming your lungs out to notice or apologize to them right now. The hellish ride finally ended and when you got up from your seat your legs were shaking so much you almost fell thankfully the winter soldier and the God of mischief next to you catched each one of your arms. "I-I'm sorry..." You said in a low voice.

"Tony and Bruce are really gonna regret not coming." Nat chuckled.

"What's next?" Thor asked as you all walked away from the ride and you got support from Bucky and Loki to walk.

"Okay, I think I'm fine, thank you." They released you and you stood up a bit more firmly on your legs. "By the way, I'm really sorry for your hands." You told them with an apologetic look. They both said that they were fine.

"How about that?" Steve suggested as you walked past a shooting stand.

"Child's play." Nat smirked.

"Yeah, with you and Bucky on the team it's gonna be unfair to everyone else." You joked. You glanced towards the huge plushies dangling on top of the stall and the winter soldier didn't miss the way your eyes shined like a child in a candy room.

"I'll do it." Bucky announced to the team. You turned your head towards him and smiled.

"I wanna try it too." Loki wouldn't miss an opportunity to challenge the winter soldier. Nat held back Steve and Thor by the arm to let your two love interests fight for you. Bucky smirked as if he knew the God of mischief would never beat him on a shooting game. After all it was his most skilled speciality. The manager of the stall gave them each a gun and explained the rules while you stayed behind with the others.

"Bucky is so winning this." Nat said.

"Don't underestimate my brother with a gun." Thor defended Loki. You looked at Nat and Thor before reporting your attention to Bucky and Loki. Oh God, this was still just a game right? The winter soldier and the God of mischief glared at each other before they started shooting. You covered your ears and closed your eyes, you weren't used to the sudden loud din. When you opened them you were shocked, all the targets were down. The manager looked surprised too as if no customer had ever won at the game.

"Pick a prize." He told them after he let out a resigned sigh. You saw them both turn to face you and your eyes widened. What the fuck were they doing?

"Which one do you want?" They asked you at the same time and you heard the others chuckle behind you.

"Oh my God..." You let out as you blushed. Finally you picked two huge stuffed animals and you were happy. It was actually nice and the gesture warmed your heart. "Thank you." You told them before walking to each of them and placing a small kiss on their cheek.

"[Y/N], do you wanna come with me to the van to leave your prizes there?" Nat asked you but with the way she was looking at you, you knew it wasn't a question. She grabbed your arm and left the boys behind after she took the keys from Steve.

"I know what you're going to say." You started. "But I can't help it. They both make me feel things. I don't wanna hurt any of them." You sighed.

"You're hurting both and yourself by not making a choice." She said to you.

"I know Nat but I need time, I'm not decided yet." You said.

"Ok you know what? I thought you were just provocating us all along but it's starting to worry me that you're really being serious about Loki." She finally let out.

"Nat!" You gasped. "Why wouldn't I be?? He's really nice with me." You said.

"We're all nice to you [Y/N]." She said.

"It's different! H-He says things to me... Things like Bucky says." Her eyes widened. "I can't have this talk with you anyway, you're clearly on team Bucky." You said.

"Well yeah, unlike Loki I know Bucky will treat you right."

"You don't know anything about Loki which is why I'm willing to do everything for you all to change your opinions about him."

"You're what now?" She asked.

"You heard me. Loki deserves a second chance as much as you all did." You said with determination and closed the door of the van after placing your plushies on the seats. "C'mon, don't you trust me by now? I know what I'm doing. You know I've met bad people, Loki isn't one of them." She stared into your eyes as you stared at hers.

"Well, when you look at me like that I can't argue, can I?" She said. "But you can't stop me from rooting for Bucky."

"Fair enough." You smiled and then she took your arm to return back to where you left the boys.

  
  


\---

  
  


When you returned you and the team did a few fun and non scary amusement rides before you all agreed to take a break and eat something. You were now sitting on a bench and munching on hot dogs.

"We have to do the haunted house next." Nat announced.

"Thor is gonna get nightmares again." Steve teased.

"And cookie handles horror badly." Loki smirked as he nudged your shoulder.

"Hey~" You replied falsely upset as you looked at him and smiled. "I'm actually a bit excited, I can't wait to get scared."

"I already told you that was weird, right?" Loki teased.

"Looks like you found your perfect match since you love scaring people so much." Thor added as he was eating.

"Yes. I think I did." Loki replied and your eyes widened. You blushed and you looked away to avoid his gaze. Your heart beat faster in your chest. It has been days and many things happened but you still had a hard time believing people could be into you. Thankfully no one made comments even though you were pretty sure they all heard the Asgardian's confession.

After you all ate your food you went to the haunted house, the manager explained that you had to go in small groups so you divided by two. Nat, Steve and Thor in a team and Loki, Bucky and you in another. The captain's team decided to go first and fifteen minutes later they came back and while Nat and Steve were crying with laughter Thor's face was as white as a sheet.

"Oh my God, are you okay?" You asked the God of thunder. He kept silent which worried you. "M-Maybe this is a bad idea..." You started.

"No, no, you're not going anywhere except in there. Go!" Nat hurried you as she gently pushed your back.

"Don't worry, doll, I'll protect you." Bucky said as he came next to you.

"Wait, go on the other side. If I have to hold your hand I wanna take your normal one. You might crush me with the other." You said as you moved him to your left so his flesh arm was on your side. Loki moved to your right and then you stepped inside.

"What are we supposed to expect in here? I've never been to a haunted house either." The God of mischief said.

"I-I don't know? Probably loud noises or people jumping at us to scare us." You said not reasssured at all. "By the way, don't do any magic tricks or something. These people are humans, it's just their job to scare us." You warned Loki just in case, you didn't see him but he smirked.

"It's getting really dark." Bucky commentated.

"Yes it is- AHH! What's that?!" You screamed.

"It's just me, calm down, doll." Bucky started laughing as he took your hand in his. You decided to hold both his and Loki's hands again as you walked further into the darkness. Suddenly a light turned on and you saw a scary child appear right in front of your face and you let out a huge scream before falling to your knees.

"I'm gonna die!" You whined. The winter soldier and the God of mischief were holding back chuckles as they helped you up back on your feet. "Y-You know what, you two must be psychopaths for not getting scared at all." You said as you huffed. You noticed the child was gone and a path opened in front of you.

"Guess we have to go through there." Bucky said.

"How smart of you." Loki mocked.

"Don't start!" You yelled as they glared at each other. "Please, I just wanna get out of here, it was a mistake." Suddenly you heard the sound of what you recognized was a chainsaw. "Oh God, what again?" You turned around and you saw a huge man wearing a mask behind you, he was starting to run towards your team with a chainsaw in his hands. You screamed as you ran forward with your two partners. You arrived in a room that looked like a bathroom and when you turned around the man with the chainsaw was no longer here.

"Cookie, I dare you to open the curtain." Your eyes widened after you noticed there was a bathtub hidden by a bloody curtain.

"What?! Are you mad??" You asked Loki. "Oh, fuck. Okay, I can do it." You gathered your courage and took slow steps towards the corner of the room where the bathtub was. You were concentrating and suddenly you felt something grip your leg, you let out the loudest scream since you entered this place. You turned around and found Bucky and Loki dying with laughter. The winter soldier was the one who gripped your leg and tricked you. "Ugh, I hate you both!" They stopped laughing and looked behind you with widened eyes. While you were scolding them you didn't hear the curtains open and when you turned around to check what they were staring at you were faced with a terrifying sight. A woman with cuts and bloods all over her body, the bathtub was filled with a red liquid too. She stared into your eyes, her face was frightening and when she screamed you did too and ran away from the room with the two idiots following behind you.

After spending quite some time being chased by scary monsters you had finally reached the end of the house. It was nighttime already and while you were taking back your breath after screaming and running so much you crossed eyes with Bucky and Loki before all three of you let out a huge laugh.

"So, how was it?" Steve asked after his team joined you when they recognized your forms from afar.

"Terrifying." Bucky said.

"Yeah, it was so scary. I loved it." You said.

"I had a great time too." Loki added.

"I don't think I ever ran that much." You wiped the tears of laughter off the corners of your eyes.

"You'd do it again?" Thor asked.

"Oh no, never. That was the scariest thing ever." You replied.

"But you just said-" Thor huffed. "Midgardians..."

"I told you you were weird." Loki said to you.

"I had fun, it's all that matters." You smiled.

"Hey, doll. Have you ever tried cotton candy?" Bucky asked you as he catched a vendor not far from where you guys were talking.

"No, what's that?" You asked.

"Why don't you go with him?" Nat suggested to you as she raised one eyebrow. You rolled your eyes before taking the hand Bucky was giving you and then you followed him towards the vendor. You stayed next to him as he bought one cotton candy from the vendor then he released your hand before taking a little piece of the pink fluff on the top.

"Open your mouth." He said to you with a smile and you obeyed him. Bucky put the piece of candy inside your mouth and watched your reaction.

"Oh wow, what's that? It's so sweet and soft." You said with shiny eyes.

"Just like you." Bucky said and you couldn't help smiling as you blushed. He took your hand back in his and brought it to his lips to kiss the back of it. Your stomach did a backflips. You really missed this. "Do you know how they make it?" He asked you. You shaked your head. "They pour sugar inside a small hole in a big machine, the machine heats up and makes the sugar melt and while it heats the machine spins. At the contact of cold air the melted sugar turns into filaments and then the candy maker takes a stick and catches all the filaments with it. That's how you get cotton candy." You listened to him carefully as Bucky explained how the treat is made and you stared into his eyes the whole time. You really liked the way he spoke, his voice was charming and smooth. It's like the first time you really listened to him and you loved what you discovered.

 


	23. Supportive teams

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to post this earlier since I was super productive today and wrote 2 chapters!  
> This is my longest fic in history! Thank you for 4000 hits!

You and Thor held onto each other after you went down from the rollercoaster, this time you were sure of it. You were going to be sick.

"Are you guys okay?" Steve asked you and the God of thunder.

"Please just let me breathe some fresh air. If I smell literally anything I'm going to be sick." You warned. You sat on a bench with the Asgardian while the others looked at you two.

"You've travelled many times in the bifrost, how are you sick?" Loki asked his brother.

"I don't know, must be this planet. The pollution and all." Thor replied.

"Okay, I'm okay." You said as you got up but your head immediately started spinning so you fell back on your seat. "No, I'm not."

"Doll, stay down." Bucky said as he approached you. Loki came by your side too and started waving his hand next to your face to give you air and it made you laugh a little.

"Thank you." You said. "I'm fine, don't worry." You reassured them.

"Do you want me to bring you something to drink?" Loki asked you.

"No, it's fine." You smiled at him.

"I would like something to drink, brother." Thor said to the God of mischief.

"Do I look like a bartender to you, go get your drink." Loki rolled his eyes as he spoke to his brother. He reported his attention back to you and gently caressed your hair. Thor stared at him and he looked upset.

"It's getting late, do you guys wanna do one last ride?" Nat asked the group. You've had your eyes on one ride since you came here. It was the tallest, brightest and probably the most exciting ride of the theme park.

"The ferris wheel." You let out.

"Are you sure? You don't wanna get sick up there." Steve said to you.

"It's fine, it doesn't go fast like the rollercoaster. I really wanna do something that looks relaxing and the view must be amazing." You said.

"Ferris wheel it is then." Nat said. "Are you both fine now?" She asked you and Thor.

"Yeah, I'm good to go." You said. You turned to face the God of thunder who also seemed to be doing alright. Bucky and Loki both gave you one of their hands to help you back onto your feet and you gladly seized them. "Thanks." You smiled at them.

"C'mon, let's go." Steve hurried you all. You walked to the line of the ferris wheel and waited for your turn. Oh, no... When your turn finally came you noticed the ride had small booths that only allowed two people inside. Steve and Nat climbed together in one booth and then when the manager turned to you the worst that could happen to you happened.

"Doll-"

"Cookie-"

Both Bucky and Loki handed you one of their hands and you had to make a decision. Who will you choose to ride with? Panic submerged you and so without thinking and in hurry you grabbed Thor's arm. You looked at him with an anxious expression and pleaded him with your eyes. Natasha was right, while you weren't making a decision all three of you were suffering because of this situation.

"I'm sorry gentlemen, I think lady [Y/N] prefers my company over yours." Thor joked to ease the mood. The manager opened the booth and you climbed inside it with the God of thunder.

"I-I'm really sorry, Thor..." You said as you lowered your head.

"About what?" He asked. "I'm glad to be with you, I'm not sure it would've been fun with my brother or Bucky." He grinned and it made you feel a little better. Then he paused before asking you a question. "Your heart can't decide between the two of them, right?" You nodded as the ride started. "Though I gotta admit, I wonder what you saw in my brother that the others didn't." Thor chuckled a bit.

"I don't know, it happened so suddenly." You told to the Asgardian. "I think it was during the party. I was alone and Loki came and made me have a good time. It really surprised me."

"Yes, I think that describes Loki well. Surprising." Thor added.

"When the others talk to me about your brother you know they- Well you must know. But when he's with me he doesn't act at all like they described him. He's funny, caring and kind..." You continued.

"I think that's the first time I ever heard someone use these words to describe my brother." The God of thunder said as he faced forward. "I'm glad he met someone as pure as you."

"I-I'm not pure..." You started blushing.

"I think we can all agree that it's the first time we met someone like you, despite everything you went through you still act kind to other people." Thor said. You smiled a bit sadly.

"You know what they say... Don't do to others what you don't want people to do to you." You looked at him. "I live by that motto." You smiled.

"You have a positive influence on Loki and I think he really needed it for his redemption. Whatever your decision shall be at the end I hope you two can remain in good terms." Thor said as he turned his head to face you and he smiled. You had tears in the corners of your eyes.

"Thank you." You said to the Asgardian.

"But I still hope you chose him. I think my mother would love someone like you." He joked.

"Thor..." You rolled your eyes. "Now I have Steve and Nat on team Bucky and you on team Loki."

"You'd have me as a step-brother." You two started laughing.

"You're right, that does add to the balance." You teased.

"Hey, look, you climbed in this for the view right? I think we're high enough." Thor said as he pointed behind you. You turned around and your jaw dropped at the sight. Your eyes shined as brightly as all the lights in front of you in the darkness of the night. The view was absolutely breathtaking and for a moment you forgot about all your troubles and problems. Sure, you wish you were sharing this moment with either Bucky or Loki but this wasn't so bad after all. You had the whole view for yourself and you could memorize each part of it inside your head.

"It's so beautiful." You let out.

"You can see sceneries like this one daily if you come to Asgard." Thor teased and that got him a light slap on his arm from you which made him laugh.

"Okay, I get it." You smiled.

You and Thor kept joking around until the ride finally ended. You felt bad when you learned that Bucky and Loki didn't climb together but maybe this was better. What if they fought during the ride? It would've been bad, but oh well, there will probably be new occasions to enjoy the ferris wheel again.

"So, did you like it [Y/N]?" Steve asked you.

"Yeah, the view from up there was really stunning." You said with a grin. You were now walking through the park to join the entrance and leave when suddenly you heard loud noises coming from the sky. You stopped and raised your head as well as your teammates. "Wow..." You let out.

Colorful and gorgeous fireworks went off and exploded above your head. You stared at them with mesmerized eyes. The night couldn't end in a better way to be honest. You started tearing up when it hit you how many things you had missed while you were running away during your life. The world had so much to offer and you had never realized it. You were thankful to the Avengers about all the things they teached and showed you. You were shivering as you were hypnotized by the show but suddenly you felt something warm wrap around you and it brought you out of your reverie. Bucky had taken off his leather jacket and put it around your shoulders. You stared into his eyes before smiling at him.

The winter soldier had been staring at you the whole time, he didn't care about the fireworks or everything else around him. It warmed his heart the way your expression turned into a child-like one, you looked so happy and he thought that was the best look on you. Bucky wanted to show you the whole world just so he could gaze at that joyous smile on your face forever.

"Why are you crying?" The God of mischief asked you as he came next to you. You brought your fingers to your face to touch your cheeks and your eyes widened as you realized you were indeed crying.

"I-I don't know..." You said as you looked at your fingers. "I'm not sad or anything, in fact I'm really happy." You said as you grinned. "I never had this much fun before. I-I'm just so glad to be with you all." You said as a tear streamed down your cheek.

"Aww, you're so adorable [Y/N]." Nat said before wrapping her arms around you. Then Thor came too and suddenly everyone joined you in a group hug. Thor pulled his brother when he noticed he stayed behind and you gripped Loki's arm to show him you needed him too. You didn't care if team Bucky didn't like the God of mischief, they stayed close to each other as they hugged you on your right and the two Asgardian Gods were squished against each other as they hugged you on your left. You really felt loved.

  
  


\---

  
  


When you arrived in the parking lot you decided to all go to bed and so you bid each other goodnight. You hugged them all individually and thanked them for the fantastic day you had.

"Sweet dreams, cookie." Loki whispered to your ear as you hugged him tightly. You kissed his cheek and then took the elevator with Bucky.

"Oh, here by the way. Thank you." You gave him back his jacket.

"You're welcome, doll." The winter soldier smiled at you.

The elevator stopped at your floor and the doors opened soon after, you stepped out with Bucky and when you reached his door you dropped your plushies on the ground before taking the super soldier into your arms.

"Goodnight, Bucky." You said softly to him. He hugged you tightly and put a kiss against your neck before releasing you.

"Sleep well, doll." He smiled at you tenderly.

You stepped inside your room and hurried to get ready to sleep. You were super tired and you even started yawning at the sight of your bed. You took your two stuffed animals with you under the sheets and finally closed your eyes. For the first times you didn't get trouble sleeping, you didn't overthink about your problems, you slept peacefully.

  
  


The next day Bruce was alone in the kitchen when then he got joined by Nat, Steve and Thor.

"Good morning." Nat greeted him.

"Hey." He said to them before he took a sip of his coffee. "How did the evening go for you guys?" The doctor asked them, curious.

"Good. We had a good time." Steve replied as he started preparing breakfast.

"You should've come, it was really fun." Nat told him with a smile. "[Y/N] and Thor got sick."

"I see you're here." Bruce started as he looked at Thor. "But is [Y/N] alright?"

"Yeah, she was fine by the end of the night." Thor said.

"She's probably just sleeping." Nat said.

"And did things go well with... Loki?" Bruce asked.

"Surprisngly he didn't do anything fishy." Steve said.

"That doesn't mean I'm gonna trust him." Nat started. "No offense, Thor."

"None taken." The God of thunder replied. "Though even I gotta admit, I think he's changed. And I've actually known him since we were both kids."

"You think it's because of [Y/N]?" The captain asked.

"How are you so slow with these things Steve, of course it's because of [Y/N]." Nat said to him with a chuckle.

"She confessed to me she liked my brother and Bucky and her heart couldn't make a decision." Thor admitted.

"What?!" Bruce asked a bit alarmed.

"Yeah, she told me that too." Nat continued.

"I...Okay." Steve was speechless.

"Who do you think she will choose?" The doctor asked.

"Bucky, obviously." Nat replied as she rolled her eyes.

"She will become princess of Asgard if she marries Loki." Thor added.

"Oh, okay. We're talking marriage now." Steve let out as he couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"I don't think she went to Loki for the title, Thor." Nat said to him.

"Yeah, you're right." Thor took a few seconds to think. "[Y/N] would've come to me otherwise." He said with pride and that made the three Avengers members in the room burst out laughing. "What?" He asked after he didn't understand why they were laughing. "Becoming the queen of Asgard is a title many Asgardian women would kill for."

"Forget it." Nat huffed to him. "What about you Bruce? Who do you think she will choose in the end?"

"I don't know? I haven't really been involved. To me it was surprising enough that someone like her could become close to Bucky so let alone Loki." Bruce said.

"Good morning!" Tony announced as he walked into the kitchen. "What's up?"

"We were talking about [Y/N] and her two love interests." Nat said to him.

"Oh God, I almost forgot about that." Tony said as he pulled a chair and sat on it.

"Breakfast?" Steve asked him.

"No, no. I already ate with Pepper. She says hi to you all by the way." He said with a smile. "So, what about [Y/N]?" Tony asked.

"It's confirmed she likes both Bucky and Loki and she also can't pick between the two of them."

"Poor girl. She never had a relationship before and she goes for the two dangerous men I can think of. I should've introduced her to Peter. He's a nice guy." He sighed.

"Parker? Isn't he like fifteen?" Nat asked as she frowned.

"What? That young?" Tony looked surprised. "I need to ask Happy, I forgot how old the kid was."

"I doubt that even if Peter had her age she would've went to him if she chose people like Bucky and Loki." Bruce said.

"Yeah, I think [Y/N] has a thing for bad boys." Nat chuckled. "Which is funny because she told us that when she's alone with them they're as harmful as lambs."

"Good morning." You said as you entered the kitchen with the winter soldier and the God of mischief. You had met with the two in the elevator, Bucky was up early for his morning training and Loki had just woken up like you, you were all headed to the kitchen. Suddenly the Avengers went silent but you didn't question it. "Hey, Tony. How was your evening?" You asked him with a smile.

"Great, thank you for asking." He replied a bit too quickly, you found it suspicious but said nothing. "By the way, I have to warn you all-" He started. "I planned a training for today. It's been a long time so I thought it was time." Tony announced.

"Great, okay." Steve said. You smiled as you glanced at Loki. You knew what that meant. "Well, everyone gather around. Eat well for breakfast is ready." The captain announced with a smile.

You all took seats around the table and then started to eat. You talked a bit with the God of mischief discreetly as everyone was digging into their plates and you noticed he seemed a bit nervous but you were really optimistic about this. You couldn't wait for everyone to finally accept him to become an Avengers. After all what could go wrong? Loki was a skilled opponent and his magic could be very useful to the SHIELD. You knew you would probably have to face Nick Fury but if you convinced Tony to give the God of mischief a chance you knew that anything was possible. Tony did warn you you would be responsible for looking after Loki but you trusted him and you knew you could count on him. You were definitively going to make everyone change opinions about the Asgardian.

You knew you had to give him this at least because deep inside you you knew your decision was already made between Bucky and Loki.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> DUN DUN DUNNN


	24. "I love you"

You were sure of it. Your heart belonged to Bucky.

Had it not been for that sad episode at the party you and Bucky would probably already be together and official. You did grow feelings for Loki but you had to admit, his story moved you and someone who acted so nice with somebody like you truly deserved to be happy but that's all it was. You wanted to help Loki, you wanted him to be happy and you wanted him to feel accepted by everyone else because it's what he deserved in your opinion but your heart only truly beat for the winter soldier. You were sure of it now.

Though you had to admit, when Loki looked at you with his mesmerizing eyes you could never gather the courage to reveal the truth to him. Hurting him is the last thing you wanted. You were afraid of his reaction, you were afraid of what he would do and lastly you were afraid he might feel abandonned again. Loki was amazing but you were not his. You thought back of the things he told only you, the expressions he showed only to you and the things he were willing to do only for you.

Your heart ached inside your heart but this couldn't keep going anymore. Both Loki and Bucky were hurting during the time you were not taking a decision and you were hurting too. But before revealing anything to him you had a mission to accomplish. Make Loki an Avengers. That's the least you could do for him. If you couldn't give him your heart you could at least offer him his redemption.

"Are you ready?" You asked the God of mischief with a smile. You were at his door to come get him for the special training lesson with the official Avengers members.

"Do I have a choice?" He sighed.

"C'mon, it's gonna be great." You took his arm and pulled him out of his room. "You're not scared, are you?" You teased. Loki raised one eyebrow.

"I'm not scared of anything, cookie." Loki smirked at you. You both knew that was a lie but you decided to not tease him any further.

"I'm sure you'll do fantastic." You reassured him with a gentle expression. "You're one of the strongest person I know." Loki turned his head to look at you and he felt his heart warm at your words, his lips curved into a small genuine smile as you both headed for the elevator.

When you reached the training room the Avengers were already there. You notified them of you and the Asgardian's presence with a friendly greeting. They smiled when they saw you but furrowed their brows when they noticed the God of mischief by your side.

"What is he doing here?" Bucky asked.

"I have nothing against [Y/N] joining us but yes, why is Loki here?" Nat asked as well. You stared at Tony, you thought he told them.

"I warned you, he's your responsibility now. You explain it to them." Tony said to you as he raised his arms in abandon. You sighed before taking a deep breath and speaking to the Avengers.

"I want to make Loki an Avengers." You announced. A huge silence dropped in the training room.

"Wh- What..?" Bruce broke the silence by asking.

"You knew about this?" Nat asked Tony.

"She... Indeed told me about it."

"And you're okay with it?" Steve asked Tony this time.

"Hey, don't look at me like this. She had arguments and I'm sure [Y/N] will do you all the pleasure of explaining why she thinks this is a good idea, right?" Tony said as he turned his head to look at you and hurry you to explain.

"Well, first of all-" You started, you were a bit intimidated now that you had to face all of them. "I trust Loki and I don't think he's a bad guy." You saw one of them was about to speak but you raised your hand so they could let you continue. "Don't bring up the 'he's killed people' argument, I already had this talk with Tony and I will probably have it again with Nick Fury."

"At least she's aware she has to speak with SHIELD too." Bruce said.

"As I was saying-" You took a deep breath. "Yes, Loki's done bad things in the past but the famous God of mischief in the New York incident isn't the only person I heard about in the news. You all have made mistakes in the past I believe and your way to redemption was this. The Avengers. Loki can redeem himself if he offers his strength, his power and-" You smiled at him. "His mischief to the SHIELD and help you protect innocent people."

"And you want this, brother?" Thor asked his sibling with a piercing gaze. You came closer to his side and took his arm before raising your head to look at his face and smile at him reassuringly.

"I do, brother." Loki replied to the God of thunder.

"C'mon, just think about it. Who here or in SHIELD can do what he does? Teleport, change appearances, trick people. Imagine infiltration missions with Loki on your side?" You asked all of them with an encouraging voice.

"[Y/N] has points. Loki would certainly be useful to us." Thor said. "And maybe this time he will actually listen to me when I ask him to not steal something." He added and you saw Loki's lips curve into a small playful smile.

"Well, you were right about this. She indeed has arguments." Steve said to Tony before looking at you and smiling.

"You guys agree??" You asked as you started grinning.

"It won't hurt to let him into this training at least. You'll still need Fury's accord, he's the one who will decide if Loki can become an Avengers or not." The captain sighed before looking at you. "But you have my support, for now." Steve said as he stared into your eyes. You couldn't help letting out a little shriek of happiness and relief as you jumped into Loki's arms and hugged him tightly against you. Though you quickly rememberd Bucky was in the room too so you let go of the God of mischief with a little blush.

"If I could convince Tony who was mad at me at the time I think I can convince anybody to be honest." You teased.

"I wish you luck with that, [Y/N]." Steve said.

"How about you guys?" You turned to face Bruce, Nat and Bucky.

"I beat him once, I could do it again if he tries something fishy." Bruce said with pride and you couldn't help giggling, you saw Loki roll his eyes.

"I hope you really don't regret trusting him, [Y/N]." Nat said to you. "But don't count of me for that right now."

"Hey, I don't trust him either. It's [Y/N] that I trust." Tony said to Nat.

"You all can rest assured that if he dares betray [Y/N]'s trust I will end him myself." Thor said.

"I imagined my welcome to be a bit _warmer_." Loki joked.

"Hey, I trust you and I know you won't let me down. I'm not worried I'm sure they will all change their opinions about you soon." You said to the Asgardian discreetly so only him could hear, you reassured him as much as you could. "They just need to see the real Loki, the one you only showed me." You smiled at him as you took his hand and squeezed it in yours. His heart beat faster inside his chest. He truly felt like he didn't deserve you.

"I want to fight against him." You heard someone say and you turned your head as your eyes widened.

"What?" You asked as you looked at Bucky.

"It's training too... Unless he's too scared maybe?" Loki released your hand and took a few steps forward to face the winter soldier.

"What the hell is going on with you, Buck?" You asked as your brows furrowed.

"Let me handle this, cookie. It will be quick." Loki smirked as he spoke, his gaze never leaving Bucky's.

"Don't just stand there, stop them!" You ordered to the others a bit panicked.

"Why?" Thor asked, visibly amused by the situation. "He's right, it's training." You looked at Nat for support but she just shrugged.

"Take a seat, y'all." Tony announced. What the fuck was going on? Bruce put a hand on your shoulder and guided you to a bench on the side with the others.

"I don't want to see this!" You protested.

"You're the one who wanted to make him an Avengers, this is training and once he will be on the battlefield he will have to figh too." Nat said to you.

"Don't underestimate my brother." Thor said as he sat next to you.

"Don't underestimate Bucky either." Steve reminded you. You crossed your arms on your chest and pouted as you faced forward. You were worried, you didn't want to seem them fight or hurt themselves.

And so they started fighting- training as the others said. No guns, no knives, no magic tricks, just their fists and fast movements. You were anxious the whole time, you couldn't stand watching at this. You were on edge on your seat and let out a few gasps sometimes when one of them almost punched the other. This was too much for you so you got up and decided to leave the area, Loki got distracted one second when he saw you walking away and at that exact moment Bucky punched him right in the face with his metal fist. You turned around when you heard a loud thud against the floor, your eyes widened at the sight of the God of mischief laid on the floor with blood on his face.

"LOKI!" You shout out with worry as you ran towards him. You kneeled next to the Asgardian and put a hand behind his head to help him sit. "What is wrong with you?!" You yelled at Bucky.

"Doll, I-" The winter soldier started.

"No! Enough! Why do you always have to ruin everything?!" You glared at the winter soldier. Your expression turned sad as you looked back at Loki. "Come with me." You said to him in a soft voice, nothing like the tone you just used for Bucky.

"Doll-" Bucky started again. He looked really pained, not that he regretted punching Loki but because you looked mad at him, **again**.

"Leave me alone!" You helped Loki back on his feet and then left the training room with him. You headed to the elevator and decided to go to your room to have some privacy.

"Ah shit, here we go again." Nat said as she put a comforting hand on Bucky's shoulder.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Sit here, I'm gonna get a wet cloth for your nose." You ordered Loki gently after you stepped inside your room. He did as you said while you went to your bathroom, you came back a few seconds later. "I-I won't hurt you." You reassured him a bit nervously before dabbing the wet cloth on his face. He winced a bit but said nothing. "I-I'm really sorry... Ugh, I'm so mad at them, at _him_..." You frowned.

"It's not your fault." The God of mischief smiled at you.

"It looks broken..." You sighed deeply as you lowered your head. "Loki, do you trust me?" You asked as you raised your head back to stare into his eyes. The Asgardian took your hand in his.

"Why do you think I wouldn't after everything that's happened?" He smiled tenderly at you. You knew what you had to do. Fuck what you promised to the Avengers.

"Close your eyes and don't move, okay?" You said to him with determination. Loki immediately did as you said, he had an absolute trust in you. You put the cloth away and brought your hand to his nose. You closed your eyes and focused on his injury, mystical energy flew through you and soon enough you didn't feel anything anymore. All traces of blood or broken cartilage were gone, his nose was like new. You brought your hand back to yourself and Loki opened his eyes.

"Wh-" He looked confused, he touched his nose and it didn't hurt him or anything.

"That's my secret." You said to him with a small smile.

"I'm not entirely sure what it is..." Loki raised one eyebrow as he stared at your face.

"I-" You took a deep breath. "I can heal people when I touch them." You finally revealed. Loki's eyes widened before he grinned at you.

"Cookie, you are an extraordinary one." He complimented you. "Is this why you live in this tower?" He asked.

"Yes. I guess I can tell you all about it now." You said. And so you proceeded to tell him about **everything**. The part of your past you hid when you first told him about you, how you made it to survive, the wounded SHIELD agent, Nick Fury and finally meeting Tony Stark and living in the tower. "Now, you know about the _personal_ me." Loki stared into your eyes deeply, he couldn't believe everything you just said. He was truly lucky to have met you. The God of mischief couldn't help himself. He leaned on you and put his lips against yours. At this point you were too mad at your teammates to think twice about it so you kissed him back. You were just relieved he was okay, you were really anxious back then in the training room.

Once again you were mad at Bucky but you were mostly mad at yourself. This morning you were ready, your decision was made but with the recent events you didn't know anymore. Everytime you thought it was the right time for you and Bucky something happened so maybe this was fate? Maybe you and Bucky weren't truly made for each other? Maybe the one for you was the man you were kissing at the moment? It was always Loki who was there when you felt lost and alone. You had to admit it at least, Loki was making you happy and happy is what you needed.

"Cookie- No..." He paused. "[Y/N]-" Loki breathed against your lips before putting his palms on each side of your face and stare into your eyes. "I love you." Your eyes widened and your jaw dropped. At the speed your heart was beating you thought you were going to have a stroke. You felt like crying suddenly, tears appeard in the corner of your eyes and the Asgardian got worried. "What's wrong?" He whispered.

"I-I'm sorry... I-I can't say it back..." You cried but Loki wiped your tears away with his fingers and then put a kiss against your forehead.

"Shh, it's alright." He reassured you before bringing your head against his chest, he wrapped his arms around your body and gently cradled you. That calmed you. "I know you are torn at the moment but I'll wait as long as you need me to."

"You're the first person who ever told me that." You said to him as you wrapped your arms around him too. "I-I can't say the words but I want you to know Loki, I feel something. I do." You raised your head back to his level and looked into his eyes. "You make me happy and I don't care if no one on this Earth will come to trust you, I promise you you will always have me and I will defend you against the whole world." You said with determination. "Because I know the real Loki and I trust you." You said to him. Loki crashed his lips back against yours and you let out an accidental moan against his mouth. He kissed you with so much passion and love you felt butterflies flutter inside your stomach. You wrapped your arms around his neck and squeezed him tightly against you. Fuck, you started to feel hot and that was bad.

"I want you, [Y/N]." Loki moaned against your mouth. He ran his tongue on your lower lip and you parted them to let him invade your mouth.

"Please, don't say things like that to me..." You looked into his eyes.

"It's the truth. I want you." He repeated. You gripped his collar and kissed him deeply. You backed up on your bed and soon enough Loki laid you on it before hovering above you. He rested between your thighs as he kept kissing you then he left your mouth to bury his head in the crook of your neck. You let out a little moan when he sucked on your skin there, this was definitively gonna leave a purple mark on your skin.

"L-Loki..."

"I love the sounds you make." He smirked as he came back at your face level to look at your eyes. You blushed as you realized how embarrassing it was. Then Loki looked at you more seriously. "How far do you want to go?"

"I-I'm not ready, I'm sorry..." You said sadly.

"It's fine." He reassured you before putting a kiss on your lips. "Do you want me to leave?" You immediately shaked your head.

"I-I'm sorry to ask you this but can you stay with me please?" You asked.

"How can I say no this adorable face of yours?" Loki smiled at you tenderly. He moved off you and laid next to you on the bed. You turned to stick your body to his and hug him.

"Loki, I..." You paused. "I really wish I had met you first." You confessed. The God of mischief took your hand and tangled his fingers with yours.

"Trust me, cookie, me too."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, Bucky ruined everything.


	25. She will come back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [EDIT: I edited this message because it contained spoilers about the future chapters and since I don't want my future readers to be spoiled and ruin their lecture I deleted the spoilery parts. Here's the edited version below.]
> 
> Before you start reading this chapter I want to say a few words to some of y'all.  
> You have the right to not like my fic but I would rather have you all stop reading it than tell me about how boring or unlikable you find my work.  
> Writing is a hobby for me that allows me to escape my reality and think about something else than my depression. I write for myself first and then I decide to publish it online because I think others might need a distraction as well and will find some comfort in this.  
> Bucky and Loki are my two favorite characters in the mcu. I plan to make this long, I don't have an exact amount of chapters in head but I wanna reach at least 100k words and create 40 chapters.  
> As long as I have ideas I will keep creating chapters.  
> Now that this is out of the way, I wanna thank the people who leave me nice comments and compliment my way of writing. It's always super motivating to get cheered on your work and to know that people are excited for the new chapters. And, of course, thanks to everyone who despite everything continue reading this and leaving kudos.

You and the God of mischief took a little nap until the afternoon, you needed to rest after everything that's happened in the morning. You opened your eyes and turned your head to look at Loki's face, he was still sleeping and he looked so peaceful. You carefully brought your fingers to the side of his face and guided them on his pale skin to trace his traits. Suddenly he opened his eyes and it startled you so you brought your hand back to you.

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to wake you." You stuttered in shame. Loki took your hand in his and brought it to his lips. Your eyes widened, only Bucky has done this to you before.

"How are you feeling?" The Asgardian asked you. You sighed sadly.

"Conflicted? I-I'm mad at them for treating you like they did. To be honest it brings back bad memories." You admitted.

"You don't have to worry about me, cookie." He smiled at you.

"But I do. You're so kind to me, I won't let them continue treating you like this. If they respect me and see me as a friend then they need to do the same with you." You said determined. "Because you're **my** friend and I trust you." Loki wrapped his arms around your body and brought against him.

"The things you say to me, cookie..." He started. "You have no idea how much power you have on me."

"Loki-"

"I don't think you realize how much I've changed for you and how much more I'm willing to change to please you." He said as he put a finger under your chin to raise your head and stare into your eyes.

"I do realize you've changed." You smiled at him. "The only thing I want is for you to be happy."

"I am when I am with you." Loki confessed as he brought the hand that was under your chin on the side of your face. You bit onto your lower lip as you stared into his eyes before closing yours and leaning on his face. You kissed him softly, you couldn't help it. When the God of mischief was saying sweet things like that to you it made your heart beat faster and you wanted to show him with actions how much they meant to you.

"Hmm." You let out a pleasing hum against his lips before he broke the kiss. "Again..." You whined so cutely he had to laugh. You felt him smile as he kissed you once more before he decided to play with you a little. Loki broke the kiss one more time and he was surprised to see try to catch his mouth with yours again.

"Tell me what you want, cookie." He stared deeply into your eyes with his seductive gaze and voice that did things to you. You blushed under his stare.

"Y-You know what I want..." You muttered.

"I want to hear it." Loki said.

"Kiss me." You finally let out.

"How do you want me to kiss you?" He asked again and you were getting frustrated.

"L-Loki stop toying with me, i-it's embarrassing to say... out loud..." You said as you avoided his gaze.

"You get embarrassed around me?" He smirked as he looked at you.

"Don't act like you don't know you're intimidating and all..." You pouted as you laid back on the bed and crossed your arms on your chest. Loki chuckled before towering you and making you look at him.

"You're so adorable."

"Are you mocking me?" You asked as you raised one eyebrow.

"I would never." He replied. "But I do enjoy playing and I'm having a great time with you." He teased. "Tell me what you want and I shall give it to you." You hesitated as you brought your eyes back to his and bit nervously onto your lower lip.

"Kiss me like you did before, with p-passion." A blush had crept on your cheeks as you spoke, the God of mischief raised one eyebrow.

"Well? See, that wasn't so bad, was it?" He asked. You rolled your eyes.

"Loki, I swear if y-" You started but he interrupted you by crashing his mouth against yours. He licked and sucked on your lower lip before your tongue came to meet his. They danced sensually inside your mouth and you couldn't help moaning. Loki took in all your sounds, he really enjoyed hearing you moan. He felt pride as he realized he was the one making you feel good at the moment. You wrapped your arms around his neck while he ran his hands on your sides while you kissed.

"I'm afraid-" He started as you both broke the kiss to pull back for air. "I will have to stop now while I can cookie, because if we keep going I won't be able to control myself."

"I-I understand, I-I'm sorry Loki." You said before putting one last kiss on his mouth and releasing him of your arms. Loki laid next to you and let out a long sigh. God, you felt bad. "D-Do you want to get out of here? I mean the tower? We could grab a late lunch outside, I don't wanna run into anybody in the kitchen." You suggested to him.

"I don't think we're allowed to do that." Loki said to you.

"I'll go warn Tony, they got worried last time because they didn't know where we were but it will be fine this time." You said as you got up from the bed. "Wait for me here, I'm gonna find him." Loki nodded and you got out of the room. "F.R.I.D.A.Y where's Tony?" You asked the AI.

"In the lab, miss." She replied. You headed there.

"Hey, Tony." You announced yourself, the door was open so you stepped in.

"Oh, [Y/N]. Didn't see you and our guest at lunch." He said.

"Yeah, about that..." You started. "I've come to _warn_ you this time... I want to go out with Loki."

"What? Why?" He asked as his brows furrowed.

"Listen, I don't want to run into anybody and especially not Bucky. We're just gonna grab lunch somewhere and come back." You explained. Tony stared into your eyes before sighing.

"You still got the suit?" He asked. You rolled up your sleeve and showed him the iron wristband and smiled. "Fine." He finally let out and you jumped on him to hug him.

"Thank you! Oh and by the way can you arrange like a meeting with Fury so I can talk to him about Loki?" You asked.

"You're really serious with this, huh?" He asked you.

"More than ever." You replied. "Catch you later Tony!" You waved happily before heading back to your room.

"So?" Loki asked you when you came back.

"He said yes." You grinned. "You have permission to teleport me out of here." You said happily.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Has anyone seen do- [Y/N]?" Bucky asked. "I knocked on her door but she didn't answer." The winter soldier stepped inside the living space where everyone was chilling since they had nothing planned for the day. It was late afternoon and you and Loki were gone for a little while now.

"I'm not sure you're gonna like the answer." Tony started.

"I don't care if she's with him again, just tell me which room so I can talk to her." Bucky said with furrowed brows.

"Yeah, uh... They actually went out." Tony finally revealed.

"They-" His eyes widened. "What?!"

"And you let them?" Bruce asked Tony.

"W-Well... I didn't have a reason to say no, she has the suit and apparently trusts Loki too..." Tony explained.

"They're fine, he won't do anything to her. My brother likes her." Thor reassured everyone but Bucky grew more anxious.

"Everything has been going to shit since he lives here!" Bucky let out in an angry tone.

"Calm down..." Steve put his hand on his best friend's shoulder to reassure him.

"She will come back to you." Nat said to him so only he could hear. Bucky sighed deeply.

"Do you still believe that?" He asked her as he turned his head to look at her face.

"I do." She stared into his eyes. "[Y/N] and Loki aren't made for each other, she likes him because he treats her nicely and you know she hasn't been used to kindness but you can't build a relationship based just on that."

"I don't know anymore..." Bucky lowered his head. "And now she's mad at me again."

"That will get fixed with time, don't worry. She won't be upset forever." Steve said.

And at that moment you walked into the living space with the God of mischief by your side.

"Oh, hi again." Tony smiled at you. Team Bucky turned their heads to look at you, thankfully you hadn't heard their conversation.

"Hi." You smiled back at him.

"Where have you two been?" Thor asked as he raised one eyebrow with a smirk.

"At the park." Loki replied to your surprise. "We had a good time I believe." He said as he looked at you with a small smile.

"We did." You confirmed. "And I didn't have to use this." You teased Tony while you showed him the wristband.

"Alright, alright. I get it." He huffed.

"How's your nose?" Bruce asked to Loki meaning to ease the mood but suddenly you flinched and Nat didn't miss it.

"You did it, didn't you?" She asked you. The boys didn't understand what Nat meant. "Look at his face, no bruises or cuts." You sighed in exasperation.

"Yes, I healed him." You finally revealed and the Avengers eyes widened.

"[Y/N], we told you to keep it secret." Steve reminded you.

"Stop!" You snapped. "I wouldn't have had to do it if-" "You paused before gathering your courage and dared to look at the winter soldier in the eyes. The way you glared at him they knew you were about to say something you would've regretted so they stopped you. Bucky also didn't need to hear it, he felt bad enough.

"[Y/N], stop before it's too late." Steve said to you.

"You know what you reminded me of? All of you?" You asked as tears started blurring your vision. "You reminded me of the people I used to run away from, the people who used to bully me." You let out.

"Cookie, it's alright." Loki said as he wrapped one arm around your shoulders. You wiped the tears off your eyes with your fingers. You were sick of crying everyday in this tower. You took a long breath before you calmed down, you were thankful Loki was besides you.

"Tony." You spoke in a calmed voice. "Any news about Fury?"

"Yes. Uh, you can speak to him later. Come to my lab around 8?" Tony replied.

"Perfect." You replied dryly. You were about to walk out but Bucky took a few steps forward, Nat tried to hold his arm back but he didn't care.

"Doll-" He started.

"What?" You stopped and turned around to look at him. Bucky didn't expect it, you left him a bit speechless.

"I-I'm sorry." He just said. Your brows furrowed.

"It's not to me you owe an apology." You spat at him before walking out this time.

  
  


You dropped onto your bed heavily, you felt so exhausted. You had spent a good afternoon with the God of mischief but everytime you came back in this tower it drained your energy. It's as if the tower or _you_ were cursed.

"Are you okay?" Loki asked you. He had followed you on your way out.

"You know... After the party or at this moment-" You smiled sadly. "I sometimes wonder which was worse or better, living in this tower or when I was by myself out there." You let out. Loki approached your bed and sat on the edge of it next to your laying body.

"It will get better, cookie." He said to you gently.

"I have a hard time believing that right now." You said. "But I don't care about me at the moment, I just want to talk with Fury so he can make you an Avengers and that'll make them all step off their high horses."

"Why would you go so far for me? Putting yourself against all your friends?" Loki asked you, he had a tender smile on his face but deep down he was confused. You took a sitting position on your bed to look at him.

"Loki... You're important to me." You stared into his eyes. "I meant it when I said you deserve a redemption, you're a good person and you deserve to be happy." You said to him. "I promised you, I'll always be there for you." You smiled at him warmly and grabbed his hand. The God of mischief squeezed your hand, he wanted to tell you again how much he loved you but he was afraid of your reaction so he didn't.

"I-I'll leave you alone now." He said as he got up from your bed. You looked confused.

"You don't want to stay?" You asked softly. "I don't mind, you know I love your company." You smiled again.

"No, no. I'll let you rest. I'll see you after you speak to Fury."

"Alright." You said. "See you later, Loki." He smiled at you before bowing and then he left your room.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Hi again, Tony." You announced yourself as you stepped inside the lab.

"Hey." He replied after he turned around to see where the voice was coming from.

"Fury will come here?" You asked.

"Oh, no no. You're gonna talk to him through a hologram. Should be any minute now." Tony said as he was eyeing his computer.

"Oh, okay." You were getting a bit nervous. Nick Fury was nice to you but that didn't mean you could lower your guard with him, he was still the boss of SHIELD and that made him intimidating. Suddenly lights started activating in front of you and you saw Tony push a few buttons and finally Nick Fury's hologram form appeard in front of you.

"Good evening, [Y/N]." He spoke to you.

"Hi. I-I uh, wanted to speak with you about something." You started.

"Yes, I've heard from Tony though he didn't tell me what exactly but he said it was important."

"It is..." You took a deep breath. "I'm not gonna beat around the bush Nick... I want you to consider-" You chose your words carefully. "Making Loki an Avengers." You dropped. You saw Fury's eyes widen and he stayed silent for a little moment.

"Excuse me?" He asked.

"I want you to let Loki have a chance to redeem himself and I believe he can do that... By becoming an Avengers." You repeated. Fury looked at Tony who stayed in the room and he just shrugged so Nick reported his stare back to you.

"And why would I do that?" He asked you.

"W-Well... You must already be aware of his talents. Loki is a powerful God and his skills would most certainly be useful to SHIELD and so- to our cause." You continued.

"He can't be trusted." There it was again, you couldn't bear to hear that argument anymore.

"I do!" You said a bit louder than you intended to and Tony flinched next to you, he didn't expect it. "I trust him and you're- Nick you know how hard it is for me to trust people. Since Loki lives here he has done absolutely nothing wrong and he even protected me."

"From what?" Nick asked. You bit onto your lower lip before telling Fury about the whole incident when you teleported the first time with Loki outside. "You're out of your mind if you allowed him to do that." He said after he listened to your story.

"And yet I did and nothing happened to me. I trusted Loki with many things and he has never betrayed me. He could've harm me, kidnap me or kill me and he did none of it. He was nothing but kind to me." You continued. "Listen, I heard of what he did and what he's done in the past and there's probably a part I'm not even aware of but please let him try this. Give him a chance to redeem himself." You pleaded him.

"Is everything she said true?" Nick asked Tony. He sighed deeply before replying.

"It is. Gotta admit that since he lives here he actually behaved well and even though he's allowed to roam freely around the tower he didn't try anything fishy. Nobody catched him in a place he shouldn't be or found him messing around." Tony said. "But I still don't trust him and the others don't either. I actually believe [Y/N] trusts Loki more than Thor who's his brother."

"See?" You said to Nick with a small smile. Fury put his hands on his hips as he sighed and stared into your eyes. "C'mon, I'm not saying we make him a member right away. Put him on a mission and let him prove himself." You insisted.

"I will consider it, for now." Nick finally let out. You couldn't help grinning.

"Thank you so much!" You said. "I promise you you're not gonna regret this!"

"Don't promise things you can't guarantee [Y/N]." Nick said to you. "Alright, I'll be going now."

"Goodnight and thank you again!" You smiled and then the hologram turned off. You turned to Tony with a happy expression on your face.

"I can't believe you convinced him." Tony let out.

"I need to tell Loki!" You ran out of the lab happily. You walked through the hallway and called the elevator. You were fidgeting on your own feet with a grin on your face but it quickly disappeard when the doors opened. Bucky was standing inside.

"Doll-" His eyes widened. You stepped inside silently. Bucky pushed the button of your floor thinking you were headed there and you let him, he didn't need to know you were going to Loki's room. The winter soldier was nervous, he didn't know what to do, how to act around you. He bit onto his lower lip before speaking. "Are you mad at me?" He asked in a quiet voice, taking the opportunity that you were alone in the elevator to speak with you.

"It depends, did you apologize to Loki?" You asked as you faced forward, you didn't want to look at him.

"No..." He let out.

"Then, I am." You replied. "At least you know what to do this time if you don't want me to be mad at you anymore."

"You can't ask me that..." He said as he sighed.

"Yes, I can. What happened was unfair to him. You all's behaviors... Yours especially, you hurt me the most. After everything that I told you about me, I thought you would be the one that'd understand." You said. Bucky was looking at you even though you were ignoring him but he didn't care. Suddenly he noticed something and he approached you. You didn't know what he was going to do until he brought his hand to your neck and moved your hair out of the way. You rememberd and you blushed in shame.

"Are you with him?" Bucky asked you after you brought your own hand to your neck to cover the hickey Loki left on you.

"No." You replied truthfully.

"Do you still have feelings for me?" You kept silent. The elevator doors opened on your floor and Bucky took a step back to let you walk out first but you stayed fixed on your feet. "I see." He replied and he proceeded to walk out. What the fuck did that mean? You felt anger start to grow inside of you.

"What does that mean?" You asked. He turned to look at you. "What do you mean by you see?" You repeated.

"You're going to him, aren't you?" Bucky asked. You bit onto your lower lip in frustration, you didn't like what he was intending.

"And what about it?" You asked.

"Nothing, you do what you want." He simply replied. Your heart ached, your stomach hurt, your throat felt constricted, you were this close to break down in tears. "It's just that- there used to be a time where I was the only person you were comfortable sleeping with."

"I'm not going in there to sleep with him!" You replied. "I just had my conversation with Fury and I told Loki earlier I'd report to him about the situation." You rolled your eyes and huffed. "I don't even why I'm explaining myself to you, I owe you nothing." You said before pushing the button of the elevator but Bucky acted quicker and stood between the doors so they wouldn't close.

 


	26. What do you want?

" **What do you want?** "

You both asked at the same time but in different intonations. You sounded frustrated and Bucky sounded tired.

"What do I want?" You asked as you raised one eyebrow. "I want to go to bed so I can stop thinking for starters." You sighed. "Bruce was so right, I'm never gonna get a quiet life."

"And I want to know if you still have feelings for me." You avoided his gaze and crossed your arms on your chest. "I deserve to know that, at least." He said and your eyes widened.

"You deserve-" You looked shocked. "Get out of this elevator, Bucky." You spat out.

"Not until you reply. If you don't have feelings for me anymore say it and stop giving me false hopes if you and Loki have decided to be together." Bucky let out and your heart ached.

"I already told you, he and I are not together!" You said louder than you intended to.

"What's the hickey for?" He asked. You brought your hand back to your neck in shame.

"What about it? You used to do that too and we weren't together." You defended yourself.

"Yes and I regret every minute of it." Bucky let out and you brought your gaze back to his face. "We weren't together but I know what I was thinking about while I was kissing you on my bed." You bit onto your lower lip nervously.

"You already know how Loki feels about me." You said in a quieter voice.

"I don't care about his feelings, I want to know yours." Bucky said as he approached you.

"I told you I don't know, I need to make a decision." The winter soldier came closer and caged you against the elevator wall with his arms.

"I think deep down you already know how you feel, doll." His gaze never left yours. "Why aren't you dating him? Why haven't you offered yourself to him already? Why can't you tell me how you feel about me?" He put two fingers under your chin and raised your head. You dared look into his eyes and you started blushing. Bucky was right.

"I-I don't want to hurt Loki." You revealed.

"But you don't mind hurting me?" He asked.

"I feel less bad about it when you act like such a jerk." You let out. "You really disappointed me this morning." You said as you stared seriously into his eyes, your brows were furrowed.

"Oh c'mon, he deserved it." You pushed Bucky away with your hands.

"No, he didn't? What the hell?" You said angrily. "I don't recognize who you are. You're not the kind Bucky I met when I came in this tower."

"I don't recognize you either. Look at you, how fierce you became. You didn't even cry once since we started talking." He smirked.

"Are you saying you miss the vulnerable and pathetic me?" You chuckled dryly. "Thank yourself, you're the one who gave me the confidence to start believing in myself." You couldn't believe he was reproching this to you? This time he was wrong though, tears started blurring your vision once again.

"D-Doll..." Bucky regretted everything he said.

"Do you enjoy hurting me?!" You asked as you cried. "What is your goal, Buck?!" You pushed him out of the way and stepped out of the elevator. You decided to take the stairs since you knew the winter soldier wasn't going to leave you alone.

"Please wait, I-I'm sorry!" He ran after you. You stopped and turned around.

"How long do you think that's gonna work?! Say mean stuff to me, do things that will hurt me and then you think you can just say sorry and all will be forgotten??" You wiped your tears with the back of your hand. "Before you ask me how I feel about you ask yourself how **you** feel about me! I don't have any experience in relationships but I know that what you've been doing since my birthday party is not how you treat people you like." You left him there and headed to Loki's floor. Bucky didn't follow you.

  
  


When you were far away enough from Bucky you stopped running and sat on the stairs to calm yourself down. You were sure you loved Bucky more than Loki but you had to recognize it, the God of mischief was treating you way better than the winter soldier. Some of his harsh words were still resonating within your head. He was right about one thing. Why didn't you take the next step with Loki? What was to lose after all? You weren't in a relationship with either man and you felt for them what they felt for you. Maybe crossing that line with Loki would actually unlock new and deeper feelings for the Asgardian? Your head said Loki but your heart said Bucky, you hated it.

You got up and passed your hands on your face. You tried to chase away all these Bucky thoughts away from you and thought back about how Nick Fury said he's consider making Loki an Avengers and that made you happy. You finally got to the God of mischief's door and knocked on it. It was late but he was probably waiting for you.

"Cookie." He smiled at you before taking a better look at your face. "Are you okay? Were you crying?" Loki worried as he gently pulled you inside his room.

"I spoke with Fury." That wasn't a lie but you decided to hide from him your conversation with Bucky. "He said he'd consider your application!" You grinned happily before jumping into the Asgardian's arms. You felt good against him.

"W-What?" Loki sounded shocked.

"It's true! He didn't say no! The big boss of SHIELD said he'd consider it!" Loki hugged you tighter against him. God knows he didn't care about becoming an Avengers but if that could make you happy he'd do it right away. Loki would do anything for your happiness. He released you from his embrace but before he saw anything coming you leaned to kiss him deeply. He let out a quiet gasp but kissed you back instantly.

"I love you." Loki breathed against your lips and you smiled.

"Shh." You both didn't need that reminder that you couldn't say it back to him, at least not yet. You moved slowly towards his bed until you both fell on it. His back hit the mattress and you decided to climb on your fours above him. You kept kissing passionately while you sat on his hips. Loki gradually grinded his clothed crotch against yours until you accidently moaned against his mouth.

"How far do you want to go?" Loki asked you as he stared deeply into your eyes.

"Do you promise me you will stop at any moment if I ask you to?" You asked nervously, a blush had crept on your cheeks. "I-I don't wanna go too far..." You revealed. "But I do want to start slowly w-with you."

"I believe the word you're looking for is foreplay." Loki smirked.

"Wh-... D-Don't say it out loud..." You blushed harder.

"Is it what you want though?" You nodded shyly. "Say something anytime you want, I promise you I will stop." He reassured you.

"What about you?" You asked. "I-I mean I'd understand if you don't want to... W-We're not in a relationship and I don't look-" Loki shushed you by pressing his lips against yours.

"You're thinking too much, dear." He kissed you once more. "This won't change anything." He reassured you again. You smiled before leaning on him to catch his mouth with yours. Loki moved your positions and this time you found yourself under him as he towered you. Boy, were you nervous.

"C-Can we please turn the lights off?" You asked.

"Of course." Loki turned all the lights off and came back next to you on the bed. He gently guided a hand on your cheek before kissing you. Soon he moved between your legs so he could be on top of you. This was nothing you hadn't done before so you were okay with it, everything was going well for now. Then the God of mischief broke the kiss and went a bit down to bury his head in the crook of your neck. While he kissed you there you felt one of his hands move to your waist until it gently cupped one of your breast. You couldn't help letting out a little squeak. "Are you okay?" He asked between kisses.

"Hmm." You confirmed. "Y-Yes, it's fine, sorry."

"You don't have to apologize for everything, cookie." He smiled at you as he brought his head back to your level. Even though the lights were off you could still make out his traits and some shadows in the room, the moonlight shined brightly that night. You wrapped your arms around his neck and brought him against you to kiss him. Loki pulled on your lower lip and nibbled it before running his tongue on it to soothe the tingle. You smiled against his mouth and parted your lips to play with his tongue. The Asgardian sticked his hips back against yours and you let out a moan that made him smirk.

"L-Loki..."

"Tell me what you want." He ordered you.

"Take off my pants." You said. The God of mischief put his hands on hem of your bottoms and pulled them down carefully.

"Do you want to remove something else?" He asked you reassuringly. You smiled at how kind and patient he was being with you.

"My jacket... B-But I wanna keep my tank top on." You added.

"Of course, cookie." He gave you his hands to help you sit on the bed and then he unzipped your jacket and threw it somewhere on the floor of the room. Loki pushed you gently against the bed before he came back between your thighs. You felt a lot more intimidated now since you were in your panties.

"I think it's a bit unfair that I'm the only one who has removed layers." You teased to ease the mood.

"All you have to do is ask." Loki smiled at you. He proceeded to take off all his clothes until he was left in his underwear. Oh God, you should've shut the hell up. This is the first time you were with an almost naked man while being almost naked you too. This felt so intimate, you heart started racing inside your chest. Loki looked... Well, God-like. It was fitting. He had the right amount of muscles everywhere, his skin was so pale and it seemed so smooth. You could clearly never be good enough for someone like him. He deserved way better. He deserved a Goddess and you were not. "What's wrong?" He asked you and got you out of your thoughts as he noticed your anxious expression.

"Y-You're perfect." You let out. Loki let out a low chuckle.

"Are you worried again about your appearance?" You nodded. "You don't have anything to worry about. I thought I already told you-" He said as he leaned back on you and stared into your eyes. "I love you, [Y/N]." Your heart skipped a beat. Loki kissed you passionately as if he was trying to prove to you all the love he felt for you. You decided to stop thinking and kissed him back, his words reassured you and so you let go. The God of mischief brought back his hand on your breast as he invaded your mouth. He gently massaged it through your tank top and it felt surprisngly good.

"Hm!" You gasped against his mouth when he found your nipple and pinched it between his fingers. You started to feel hot, no one had ever touched you like this before. And sadly, somewhere in the back of your mind you couldn't stop thinking about the winter soldier. Guilt started consuming you. Maybe this was a mistake. "L-Loki! I-I'm sorry. I-I can't..." You passed your hands on your face.

"Did I hurt you?" He asked.

"No! No, you were perfect. I-It's me, I-I'm really sorry." You said. Loki moved off you and you proceeded to sit on the bed. You sighed deeply. God, this was so awkward. You felt so bad. "I'm really sorry, I'm gonna go back to my room." You said as you got up and picked up your clothes. Loki didn't say anything and let you go.

You ran to your room with your clothes under your arm, you took the stairs to be sure to not meet anybody in the elevator. You just wanted to sleep your problems and worries away. Thankfully for once you didn't meet Bucky, this would've been hard to explain if he saw you walking half naked to your room and knowing you were with Loki.

When you reached your room, you took all your clothes off and put them away, you wanted to forget about what you almost did. You took a quick shower and then dived into your bed.

  
  


\---

  
  


It has been two days since you avoided everybody and stayed in your room. You pretexted to be sick and they all left you alone, even your two love interests. Bucky didn't knock on your door, after what happened between you both he wanted to give you some rest since you were sick. Loki didn't manifest into your room either, the situation was way too awkward to pretend as if nothing happened. You didn't know what the Avengers have been up to and honestly you didn't want to think about it. Sometimes you wished you had never walked into the tower. You wondered if things would've been different if on that first day at the tower you stayed to have dinner with Bucky like Steve suggested you to.

Though now that Loki was almost an Avengers you had to be honest with him, Bucky and yourself. You didn't love him like he did and he needed to know the truth.

You sighed deeply before getting up and getting ready to meet with everybody downstairs. You headed to the kitchen as it was lunchtime already, when you heard voices in the hallway you knew they were probably all there already. You took a deep breath and stepped into the dinner room.

"H-Hi." You announced yourself shyly.

"[Y/N]!" Steve greeted you first with a grin. "Glad to see you're doing better." You saw the others wave at you happily behind the captain. Bucky threw you a small "Hi." too and Loki lowered his head. Uh oh. "Come eat with us, I bet you must be starving after staying up there all this time." Steve guided you to your seat and he eyed you to stay on it while he went to fill your plate.

"Thanks." You said in a quiet voice. He came back and put your plate in front of you. You were seated between him and Bruce.

"Eat up or he's gonna ground you." Nat teased across you.

"Send her back to her room without eating? Nah." Steve started. "But I will feed you myself if you don't finish your plate." You smiled. You missed this. You started eating and soon enough everyone started talking about random things again.

"Don't flinch." You warned Bruce with a little smile before putting your hand against his jaw. You noticed he had a small cut on his face, probably a razor cut. You closed your eyes for a few seconds and then you removed your hand to look at his face, the cut was gone. "All new." You said to him.

"Thanks." He replied as he touched his face to check himself then he smiled at you.

"Anyone else?" You asked as they all had their eyes on you, they were always fascinated by your power. Most of them shaked their heads.

  
  


After lunch everyone disappeard you didn't know where, you had retreated to your room and were currently reading until the AI called out to you. You were requested in the living space. You had the surprise to find everyone there as well. This only meant one thing. Missions.

"So, Fury called me." Tony started. "There's a new mission and some of us are on it." You listened carefully. "Natasha and... Loki."

"What?" You all's eyes widened, Loki's as well.

"It's an infiltration mission. Natasha is the most skilled among us for these and... Nick wants to try [Y/N]'s theory. It's not very dangerous that's why no one else is going. They won't need your powers either [Y/N]."

"I'm not trusting him." Nat said.

"No one is asking you to." Tony said before turning to speak to Loki. "Are you gonna do it?" You glanced at him nervously.

"What do I have to do?" The God of mischief asked.

"Right, I didn't mention it yet. The chief of a gang has stolen an old necklace from a museum or something, you know how Fury is with the details-" He sighed as he looked at the others. "Our man's gonna hold a party soon with his men to celebrate I guess. You and Natasha infiltrate it and take back the necklace. The end."

"Consider it done." Loki smirked. You let out the breath you were holding. For a moment you were anxious he was going to refuse.

"How do I know he's not gonna take it for himself?" Nat asked and Thor shrugged, he knew his brother and it could indeed be something he'd do.

"You can't." Loki replied amused by the situation.

"Maybe it's time you all start trusting him." You spoke out loud without realizing. You lowered your head and blushed in shame. The God of mischief glanced at you but said nothing.

"She's right." Steve said as he got up. "If Fury assigned him on this mission it means, even if it's just a little, he trusts Loki too. And if he eventually becomes an official Avengers member we'll all have to trust him soon enough." You crossed eyes with the captain and smiled at him. Steve walked to Loki and handed him his hand to shake it. "Don't disappoint us." Surprisngly Loki shaked his hand. Nat rolled her eyes before sighing.

"Alright, when's the mission?"

 


	27. Get her back

"Doll, do you wanna hang out?"

"No."

"Come to training with me?"

"No."

"Watch a movie?"

"For the last time, Bucky, no." You replied. The winter soldier sulked, he had no idea what to do anymore.

You've been ignoring him for days now. At least you let him call you doll and you still wore his pendant but that's all he got. For your own peace of mind you decided to ignore what happened the last time in the elevator but that didn't mean you forgot about it. You couldn't let Bucky be mean to you just because he was jealous or for any other reasons and this time it was not going to get fixed with only an apology.

"What do I have to do??" He asked in exasperation.

"You know what you have to do for starters."

"I'm not doing that." He replied.

"Why the hell not? You acted like a jerk." You said. "And even Steve shaked Loki's hand, maybe it's time you fix your mistake."

"I regret hurting you, not him." Bucky added. You gasped.

"That's even worse! You don't even regret hitting him?"

"No." Bucky let out truthfully. You rolled your eyes and focused back on the book in your hands. You and Bucky were currently on a couch in the living space. You didn't know where the others were and Loki and Nat have been gone for the mission since yesterday. They were supposed to come back this evening so until then you tried to distract yourself but the winter soldier took the opportunity of the God of mischief not being around to get you to talk to him. He missed you very much. "Can you drop your book? I wanna talk to you."

"I'm more interested in what the book has to say." You replied. Suddenly Bucky got an idea.

"Do you wanna hang out at a library?" You raised one eyebrow and the winter soldier didn't miss it.

"And why would you do that? We can't speak in a library." You asked.

"I want to please you." He said. "I wanna be back the Bucky that used to make you smile."

"Is he still somewhere in there?" You asked, you eyes still focused on the pages of your book.

"Ouch, damn doll that's harsh." He smiled.

"Too harsh for your taste perhaps? You must really miss the pathetic [Y/N] who used to cling on your arm and beg you to stay with her because she was too afraid of everything." Damn, you were on fire.

"Okay, I get it. I'm sorry for that too. I meant none of it." Bucky said. "I think I actually like this doll a litte bit more. She can almost bite." He smirked. "And I might be into that."

"Weirdo." You let out and he laughed. God, you loved that sound and it actually got you to smile.

"Is that a smile on your face?" Bucky asked as he put a finger on your book and lowered it so he could look at your face. You raised your eyes to look at him. You got up after you rolled your eyes and closed your book.

"I'm gonna get my shoes." You said as you walked out of the room.

"I'll wait for you in the parking lot, doll."

  
  


"What the hell is that?" You asked him after you walked out of the elevator. Bucky was standing next to a _motorcycle_ as he waited for you in the parking lot.

"I know I'm a man of the past but I expected you to know more about your generation's vehicles than I do." Bucky joked.

"I know damn well what this is Bucky, I'm asking you why are you standing next to it." You said.

"Because we're gonna take it to go to the library?"

"Wh- Why not a car?" You asked.

"I don't have a car and we promised Tony we wouldn't steal from him. We didn't promise Steve though and this is his." Your eyes widened.

"I'm not climbing on that." You said.

"I'm sorry but unlike your-" He rolled his eyes. "Loki... I can't teleport. Put this on and climb." He handed you a helmet.

"Bucky, no. I never rode on a motorcycle and I'm probably way too f-"

"Stop!" Bucky let out. "I don't want to hear you say that anymore, about anything." You bit onto your lower lip as you lowered your gaze. "Doll, you still trust me right? You know I wouldn't do anything that could put you in any danger." Your heart missed a beat. Then he started laughing again and your brows furrowed.

"What's so funny?" You asked.

"Everytime we do something you say it's your first time, I'm just wondering what have you actually tried." He said as he grinned.

"I'm going back into my room if you're just gonna mock me for everything." You said as you turned on your feet. Bucky put your helmets on the motorcycle and ran towards you. He wrapped his arms around your waist from behind and brought you back towards the vehicle. "Put me down!" You yelled at him.

"Doll, I missed this so much." He said as he put you back on your feet. "Missed you and that little scrunched nose." He teased playfully. You brought your hand to your face and blushed.

"I can't stand you." You said.

"I'm gonna pretend that's true to not embarrass you any further." Bucky winked. "Put this on." He handed you back the helmet and this time you **took** it and put it on.

"Now what?" You asked.

"Climb here." He patted the back seat on the motorcycle. You hesitated but finally did it. Then Bucky took place in front of you. "Everything good for now?" He asked.

"Yes." You said.

"Place your feet a little higher, yes there." Bucky said as he glanced sideways. "Give me your hands." You placed them in his and you saw him put a kiss against one of your palms, your heart beat so fast you thought it was going to burst out of your chest. You felt a chill run all over your body. Then he placed your hands on his abs. "Hold on tight, doll."

"Please, don't go too fast." You asked him, you were getting a bit scared now to be honest. The winter soldier put on his own helmet after he made sure everything was okay with you. He started the motorcycle and you let out a little gasp. It was so noisy. Finally you got out of the parking lot.

During the ride you rested your head on Bucky's back, sometimes he would go a little faster on purpose because he noticed that's when you held tighter onto him and he loved feeling you cling on him.

When you reached the library your legs were shaking a bit. That sure was something else.

"So?" He asked you after he removed his helmet. Goddamn, that was so hot. Bucky holding his helmet between his hands with his leather jacket on, his soft hair was waving in the wind, you hated how attracted you were to him. Then he smiled at you and you were gone.

"G-Good." You replied. "I-I uh... It was great, I liked it." You stuttered.

"I'm glad you had fun." He said tenderly. "C'mon, let's go get your books." Bucky said to you before taking your hand in his.

  
  


\---

  
  


Bucky started to regret everything. You've been in this library for one hour and a half and you didn't speak to him once. Sometimes he would fool around and try to get your attention but either you or the seller would shush him. The only joy he got out of this was that when he would glance at you your face would illuminate. Your eyes shined brightly and you had a precious smile on your face as you walked through the shelves. Bucky was happy only he could witness that at least.

"I'm done!" You announced to him with a bright grin. For a second Bucky got lost in it as he stared at your face. "Bucky?" You called out to him.

"Did you say something?" He asked you. You let out a small giggle.

"I said I'm done, we can leave." You smiled.

"Oh, thanks God." He let out in an overly exaggerated relieved voice.

"It wasn't that bad." You rolled your eyes.

"What did you pick?" He asked you.

"Horror."

"No romance?" He asked.

"I have enough to deal with in my own life." You replied and he grinned.

"Hand me that." He placed his hand in front of you.

"Hand you what, Bucky?" You asked, confused.

"Your books, I'm offering them to you."

"What? No, you're not." Your brows furrowed.

"Yes, I am." He smiled. "You're still mad at me aren't you? You said it wouldn't get fixed with just a sorry so let me continue apologizing by offering you these books."

"I don't want you to shower me in gifts, Bucky, I just want-"

"Shh!" The seller glared in your and Bucky's direction. You bit onto your lower lip.

"Give me these. We'll talk elsewhere." Bucky took your books and you let him to not create a racket. He paid for them and held the bag for you. You sighed deeply.

"Thank you." You said to him.

"You're welcome, doll." He smiled a cocky grin to you. "Come, there's a café nearby." Bucky guided you to a street after you exited the library. You entered a small café, it was almost empty and looked pretty cute. You and Bucky sat in front of a small table on those comfy couches in the back of the room so you could talk freely. The winter soldier laid his arm behind you and looked at you. "So, what were you saying?"

"Hi! How may I help you?" A very pretty young woman interrupted you both. Her smile was bright, she had perfect white teeth, you truly wondered what she was doing in here she deserved to model for toothpaste commercials. Bucky sighed as if he'd had enough of getting interrupted while he was with you.

"What do you want, doll?" You blushed, you couldn't believe he called you that in front of a perfect stranger.

"A-A hot chocolate." You replied.

"We'll take two hot chocolates." He said to the waitress.

"Coming right up!" She grinned before walking back behind her counter.

"Take your time." Bucky muttered.

"A-Anyway... As I was saying back then... You can't say mean things to me just because you're angry or frustrated or whatever. Y-You know that I'll keep thinking about them" You said as you looked at the table, you didn't dare to stare into his eyes.

"I'm sorry doll, I swear I meant none of it." He apologized again and took your hands in his under the table. "How can I make it up to you?" He asked. "And don't ask me to talk with Loki." You rolled your eyes.

"You're such a child." You said in annoyance.

"I want to take you on a date." Bucky suddenly let out and your eyes widened.

"What? Why?" You asked surprised.

"Because I want to?" He let out a low chuckle. "I've had enough of sharing you with other people during our evenings at the tower. I want you just for myself." He smirked seductively as he looked at you and you blushed harder.

"What do you want to do?" You asked.

"I have a few ideas." He teased and you smiled. Then you saw the waitress come back at your table with your drinks.

"Here you go!" She put them on the table. "Call me if you need anything else." She grinned and you swore you saw her wink at Bucky before going back.

"What the hell..." You said out loud without realizing.

"What?" He asked you.

"No, nothing..." You decided to ignore it.

"So, do you accept to go on a date with me tomorrow night?" Bucky stared lovingly into your eyes.

"Fine." You replied and you saw his face illuminate. Your heart missed a beat.

"Can I ask one more thing?"

"Try me." You raised one eyebrow.

"I really regret missing your birthday party. I regret not being there with you, not dancing with you, not making you laugh but I-" You lowered your head, that night brought up bad memories. "I especially regret not complimenting you about your looks, you were gorgeous." You bit onto your lower lip as you listened to him. You understood.

"You want me to wear it again?"

"Would you do me the honor?" He smiled at you.

"Well... It **is** a date and my first official one... So I guess I can dress up for the occasion." You smiled back shyly.

"You will?" Bucky asked with surprised eyes and a smile on his face as if he couldn't believe it.

"Hmm." You nodded. "But you have to dress up too, I don't wanna look ridiculous." He brought your hands to his lips and put a kiss on them.

"I promise I will." He grinned. Then you both finally took sips of your drinks, they didn't go completely cold while you talked which was nice.

"What?" You asked him after he kept staring at you.

"I'm just happy." You blushed. "I'm glad to be here with you at the moment." Bucky smiled tenderly at you.

"I-I'm pleased too." You said before taking another sip of your hot chocolate and then putting your cup down.

"Wait you got something there." Bucky said as he approached you.

"Where?" You asked. The winter soldier put a hand behind your head to keep you in place then he leaned on you and licked your upper lip.

"B-Bucky!" You gasped and wiped your mouth with the back of your hand. Your face was as red as a beet, you looked discreetly around you in panic to make sure no one saw that. "A-Are you mad?" You whispered to him but in an annoyed tone. Oh, how he wanted to reply madly in love with you but this wasn't the right time.

"Sorry, I didn't have a napkin." He joked and you huffed. The waitress chose this moment to come back and drop the note on your table. Bucky took the small piece of paper and noticed there was another one under it. He stared at it with a weird look so you got curious about it too.

"What? Is it that expansive?" You asked.

"Uh... Yeah." Bucky replied but that seemed off.

"Show me." You told him.

"No, I'm paying."

"Bucky, show me the note." He hesitated but finally showed you. You were not an expert on drink prices but that seemed normal to you and then you glanced at the second paper. There were a bunch of numbers on them but it wasn't a price, it was the waitress's phone number. "Is that why you didn't want to show me? Because if you want to join her, _**please**_ , feel free to." You said sarcastically.

"What? No! I didn't want to upset you." He immediately cleared the suspicion.

"Good." You said. "Because you're not free at the moment or tomorrow anyway." You raised one eyebrow. Bucky's lips curved into a smirk.

"Would it bother you?" He asked. Your eyes widened.

"Wh-!" You blushed. "Y-You think I'm jealous or something, don't get cocky." You pouted and looked the other way.

"I think you are." Bucky said as he approached you until you were caged between him and the wall.

"And what if I am?" You rolled your eyes. Bucky's eyes widened as he looked at you, he started smiling.

"I don't care about this waitress." He said as he took the paper and teared it up in front of you. "Or any other women. I only care about my doll." Bucky stared deeply into your eyes. Your heart beat faster inside your chest. You gently brought your hand to his cheek as you smiled slightly at him. He turned his head and kissed your palm again while maintening eye contact. For a moment you forgot where you were, it was only you and Bucky in this café. Nothing else existed. You leaned on him and gently brushed your lips against his. You felt butterflies flutter inside your stomach.

"It's getting late." You said softly after breaking the kiss. Bucky left money on the table and then you both got up. The winter soldier held your hand and guided you back to the motorcycle to go home.

 


	28. I Will Miss You

"Thank you for this afternoon." Bucky smiled at you after you both got off the motorcycle and removed your helmets.

"I had a good time." You confessed truthfully. You headed to the elevator and then stepped into the living space.

"Hey." Steve welcomed you. The captain was alone in the room. "Were you two together?" He asked.

"We were." Bucky replied. "Borrowed your motorcycle by the way."

"Really? I don't mind. Where did you two go?" He asked as he put the newspapers that he was reading down.

"The library." You replied.

"Is that so?" He threw a playful glance at Bucky.

"What I wouldn't do for my doll?" The winter soldier shrugged as he smiled. You blushed as you smiled slightly.

"What about you, what were you doing?" You asked Steve as you sat next to him.

"Wasting time. This tower isn't as fun as it looks when there's no one around."

"Aww, if I knew I would've asked you to join us." Steve smiled at you.

"Uh no, we wouldn't have." Bucky said. "I already have to share you with everyone else in this tower, I don't want anybody else around when I ask you out. Yes, even you Steve." He said as he sat across you and the captain.

"And you dare call me the harsh one." You joked.

"It's fine, you're very kind [Y/N] but I wouldn't have interfered between you both anyway." He teased.

At that moment Tony and Bruce entered the living space too and some time after Thor came as well. You chilled with the Avengers members in the living space while waiting for Natasha and Loki. While the others were discussing you were thinking about how you were going to tell the God of mischief that you made your decision. You were nervous and a bit scared, you really hoped it was going to go well. You and Loki haven't spoken since that regrettable episode in his bedroom.

Then again you wondered how the mission went for him. You were pretty sure that if he did a goob job everyone would start trusting Loki. You wanted this for him at least. You knew how he was deep inside, the himself that he showed to people was nothing like how **you** knew him. Loki was kind, caring, funny and **trustful**. You couldn't wait for that day.

"Hey." Suddenly a woman's voice got you out of your thoughts. A voice you knew too well.

"Hey, welcome back." Steve smiled at Natasha. She walked into the living space and then Loki appeard behind her. You couldn't help it, you got up and jumped into his arms.

"Hi, cookie." He smiled at you as he wrapped his arms around you.

"Welcome back." You smiled at him.

"So, how did it go?" Tony asked them. You took Loki's hand and guided him to the couch to sit next to you.

"Well, I uh..." Nat started. Why did she stutter like this, what did it mean? Did they fail??

"Mission accomplished." Loki smirked.

"That's awesome!" You let out happily next to him. The others stared at Nat and waited for explanations.

"Uh yes, what he said. It was rather quick." She added.

"What do you mean?" Bruce asked her.

"Loki... teleported us inside the house, we took the necklace and that's it. The end." You let out a laugh and it surprised them all.

"What did you say in the lab? He's under my responsibility and if he fucked up that'd be on me?" You reminded Tony with a grin. God, this felt so satisfying. After you spent so much time trying to convince them all to trust you and Loki, all your endeavors finally paid off.

"Alright, alright." Tony rolled his eyes. "I get it."

"I'm proud of you, brother." Thor said as he walked to Loki and put a hand on his shoulder.

"So, what happens now?" Steve asked.

"Well, we didn't see Fury but we will probably hear about him soon." Nat said.

"I'm not worried." You said discreetly to Loki with a smile.

"I'm glad things went well. Loki proved us that we can count on him from now on." Steve said.

"It's getting late, I'm gonna go rest." Nat said as she got up.

"Me too." Loki added. You watched him get up and at that moment Bucky got up too and you wondered why. Was he going to make a scene again?

"Loki." The winter soldier started. "I..." You saw him bite onto his lower lip before continuing speaking. The God of mischief looked at him curiously. "I'm sorry for hitting you in the face." Your eyes widened. You couldn't believe he did it. You knew Bucky probably did it so he could be in your good graces again but it didn't stop your lips from curving into a smile. You were really happy he did it. Bucky gave his hand to the Asgardian and he took it. You let out a huge sigh of relief after they shaked hands.

Nat and Loki finally left the living space to retreat to their rooms. You moved from your couch to join Bucky's across you. You leaned to kiss his cheek and then smiled at him. He looked surprised but smiled back at you.

  
  


\---

  
  


After some time and before going to bed you decided it was time to speak with Loki. You knocked on his door hoping he wasn't asleep yet. The door opened and he looked surprised.

"Hey. I'm sorry, am I bothering you?" You asked.

"No. Come in." Loki moved out of the way and let you in.

"I thought... maybe we could talk?" You said a bit nervous.

"Yes, I think it's a good idea."

"Do you wanna go on the roof? It's nice out." You suggested.

"Sure. Give me your hand." You didn't even have time to blink that he teleported you on the roof of the tower. You smiled slightly and suggested him to sit next to you.

"I'm happy for you Loki." You started. "I always knew I could count on you and that you would never betray me. Everything they said was wrong and I'm glad you proved it." You kept his hand in yours.

"Thank you, cookie." You smiled at the nickname again. Then your smile turned a bit sad.

"I-I'm really sorry for what happened last time in your bedroom." You said.

"Shh, it's okay. I knew that could happen and I told you I'd stop at any moment."

"You're one of the kindest person I met, Loki." You started tearing up. "And you will always have a place in my heart. I want you to know you can count on me for anything. If you ask for my help I will do anything for you."

"But you don't love me." He finished for you. You raised your head, he was smiling at you.

"I-I'm sorry." You sobbed. "Maybe if I had met you first things would've been different but I can't keep lying to you or to myself. You don't deserve this." You continued. Loki approached you and put his arm around your shoulders.

"This is familiar." Loki joked before speaking seriously. "I will go back to Asgard tomorrow." Your eyes widened.

"W-What??" You asked. "B-But what about the Avengers?"

"My place is not here, cookie. And Asgard needs a ruler since Thor will stay on Midgard. My brother confessed to me two days ago we could actually go back a long time ago but he didn't tell me because he wanted to see how... the situation would evolve with you." You started crying again.

"I-I'm really sorry."

"There is nothing to apologize for. I'm glad I met you." The God of mischief smiled. "You changed me into a better man."

"I'll really miss you, Loki."

"I will too, cookie. And I do hope that if you change your mind you will think of me." He half joked.

"I promise you you're the first person I'll think of." You wiped your tears and smiled at him. "Anything-" You reminded him again. "If you need me please come to me. Promise me."

"I promise you." He squeezed your hand. You both got up and you hugged him tightly. "It's getting late, you should go to bed." You released him from your arms and wiped a tear from your face.

"I'll see you tomorrow before you go I guess." You smiled sadly.

"Yes. Give me back your hand." You gave it to him and he teleported you to your room then bid you goodnight before he disappeard to his.

You sat on the edge of your bed and passed your hand on your face. You've done it now, you just wished you wouldn't regret this decision.

  
  


It was very late. You couldn't sleep and you've been rolling on your bed for hours now. You decided to get up and go downstairs. The tower was very quiet and all the lights were turned off, you stepped out bare footed to avoid making sounds. You made it to the only place that could give you comfort. The kitchen. You opened the freezer and grabbed a tub of your favorite icecream along with some cookies in a cupboard. You sat on the ground with your treats and a spoon behind the counter. You felt so down you didn't even care about what you were eating or where you were eating.

"Doll?"

"Oh for Christ's sake you scared the daylights out of me!" You said as you put your hand against your chest. "What are you doing here?" You asked the winter soldier.

"Heard you walk past my door." He said.

"Why aren't you sleeping?" You asked.

"Could ask you the same question." Bucky raised one eyebrow.

"Yes but I asked first and I have a good reason." You replied. He sighed before kneeling and sitting next to you on the ground.

"Headaches are back." He said.

"Bucky..." You looked at him. "Why didn't you knock at my door?"

"I thought you were sleeping, didn't want to wake you up."

"Well, next time do!" You stared into his eyes. "I don't want to walk on you again while you're having a really bad nightmare."

"Fine, I will." He resigned himself. "Are you gonna tell me why it looks like you're drowning your sorrow in this kitchen at 4am?" You put your tub of icecream down.

"I-I told Loki I didn't love him..." You said as you lowered your head. "And I feel awful." Bucky came closer to you and put his hand on your head to caress your hair. "He told me he's going back to Asgard tomorrow." You revealed.

"What?" Bucky's eyes widened.

"He doesn't care about becoming an Avengers, he did it for me. He did it so you all could leave me alone and stop telling me that trusting him is a bad idea." You said. "Not that he doesn't care about getting a second chance, I know he cares about that. But I understand, I can't stop him, it must be hard to live very closely next to someone you love who doesn't love you back." You felt tears coming again but you fought very hardly to hold them back.

"I thought you had feelings for him." Bucky said quietly next to you.

"I do and he will always count for me. Loki was always the kindest to me. They're just not... romantic feelings." You let out. "I couldn't keep giving him false hopes that's why I spoke to him before going to bed. And once again he proved how kind he is. He didn't get mad, didn't threaten me, didn't break anything. He just accepted my decision." You wiped a tear off your face. You put the tub of icecream back on your lap and started digging into it. "You're not allowed to tell anybody what I just told you and especially not that you found me in the kitchen floor emptying this icecream." You warned Bucky who let out a small chuckle.

"My lips are sealed." He said next to you with a smile.

"You want some?" You handed him the treat and he took it in his hands. You already started munching on the cookies next to him.

"Do you feel better?" Bucky asked you.

"No..." You started crying.

"Shh, calm down doll." Bucky wrapped his arms around you and brought you against his torso. "Just give it some time, it's gonna be alright soon." He reassured you.

"I hope you're right." You said.

"I am." He smiled at you. "C'mon, let's put you back to bed." He got up and gave you his hands to help you stand up. He cleaned your mess after you while you were wiping the tears off your face.

"Thank you." You sniffled.

"You're welcome, doll." Bucky smiled at you before giving you his arm. You took it and then headed back to your floor.

"B-Bucky, I..." You hesitated. "I-I don't want to be alone right now..." You bit onto your lower lip.

"Go grab your pillow and come into my room." Your lips curved into a small smile, you were thankful. You entered your room and headed to the bathroom to wash your face from your tears and cookie crumbles and then you brushed your teeth before grabbing your pillow and join Bucky back in his bedroom.

"It's me." You announced yourself as you opened the door after knocking on it.

"Pick your side." The winter soldier smiled at you. You hoped onto his bed and he quickly joined you.

"Thank you, Bucky." You said softly to him while you looked into his eyes. "I'm not that sleepy yet, you can close your eyes I'll relieve some of your headache pain."

"You're gonna watch me sleep?" He teased.

"Don't say it like that, I'm not a creep." You rolled your eyes as you smiled. You brought your hand to his face but before you could reach his temple Bucky catched your hand in his and kissed your palm as he stared into your eyes. "You know, everytime you do that my heart skips a beat."

"Really?" You saw him start smirking.

"Erase that smirk off your face Bucky, that means one day you might give me a heart attack." You said.

"I would never do anything that could bring you any harm, doll." He grinned.

"Don't worry, I'm joking." You said. "It's the good kind of heart skips." You blushed as you smiled slightly and avoided his gaze. Bucky smiled happily before leaving more kisses on your hand. He started leaving a trail of soft and small kisses from your hand to your arm until he leaned on you and kissed your shoulder before reaching your neck. "Bucky, that tickles!" You whined under him with a giggle. The winter soldier wrapped his arms around you as he buried his head in the crook of your neck.

"I missed this, doll." You heard him confess.

"I-I did too." You revealed. You wrapped your own arms around him and squeezed him tightly against you. Bucky backed up a bit and towered over you, he brought his head above yours to stare into your eyes.

"I'm never letting any other man almost steal you away from me." You bit onto your lower lip as you blushed and stared back into his eyes. Bucky leaned on you and put a small kiss on your nose. "I swear it, doll." Your heart beat faster inside your chest. His words meant so much to you.

"Bucky..." You let out so softly, almost in a whisper.

"What did I tell you about saying my name like that?" He teased. "You know what it does to me?" He raised one eyebrow. You shaked your head playfully. The winter soldier took your hand and put your palm against his chest. Your eyes widened, his heart was beating as fast as yours. He let go of your hand and laid back next to you. "C'mon, we should sleep now."

"I-I'm not sure I can now." You said.

"You need to, you got a date tomorrow night." He teased.

"Take me in your arms." You requested to him.

"How can I say no when you say it in that voice? Come here." You rested your head on his chest as he had you trapped between his strong arms. You put your hand on his forehead to heal him. Bucky closed his eyes when he saw you had closed yours. He let you focus and soon enough he didn't feel any pain anymore and so he fell into a deep slumber.

 


	29. Until We Meet Again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for 200 kudos and 5000 hits!

The next morning you and Bucky headed to the kitchen together to have breakfast with the others. You hadn't slept a lot and you had bags under your eyes unlike Bucky who looked like he had the best sleep of his life.

"Good morning." The winter soldier announced your and his presence happily. You noticed everyone was here except Loki.

"Someone look like they had a good night." Nat said before taking a sip of her coffee.

"Can't say the same for [Y/N]. You look terrible." Tony said to you.

"Thanks." You replied sarcastically. You glanced at Thor and you noticed he seemed less lively than usual. "Hey." You greeted him gently.

"Ah, [Y/N]. Hi." He raised his head as if he just noticed you got there.

"Are you alright?" You asked him.

"Yes, I am. I just got some bad news during the night. I talked with Heimdall, he's my best friend from Asgard, apparently my father has fallen ill." Thor explained to you.

"Oh no, I'm sorry to hear that." You said as you put a hand on Thor's arm. "Is he going to be alright?"

"I don't know." Thor replied as he smiled a bit sadly. "You know, he's very old but at least my mother is with him and soon Loki as well to rule on Asgard while my father takes his time to heal." Thor looked into your eyes. "Don't worry, I've spoken with my brother during the night. I know." This time you're the one who smiled sadly. "I'm gonna go with Loki on Asgard to check on everything but I will come back."

"I-Is there anything I can do..? Maybe with my powers I could-"

"You're a very kind woman [Y/N] but my father doesn't have war injuries that you can just heal with your powers no matter how extraordinary they are, I'm afraid there's no cure against aging." You nodded with understandment.

"I hope things will get better for you and your family." You said to him. You stared at each other for a little while with a smile on your faces before reporting your attention to the others in the room. You noticed Bucky speak discreetly to Tony but you couldn't make out what they were talking about. You ignored it and started digging into your breakfast.

  
  


\---

  
  


"It's too bad to see you leave now that you've proved yourself." Steve said as he shaked Loki's hand. You were all on the roof of the tower to say goodbye before the God of thunder and mischief departed to Asgard.

"Rest assured captain, you will hear from me again." Loki smirked. Steve smiled at him before taking a step back. "See you soon, my friend." The super soldier said to Thor. You were standing next to Bucky before you approached Loki. You didn't care about everyone around you, your arms naturally wrapped around his body and Loki hugged you back.

"Take care of yourself and remember your promise." You said to him with a determined look but you couldn't stop tears appearing in the corner of your eyes.

"Until we meet again, cookie." Loki leaned on you and put a kiss on your forehead. You released him and took a few steps back.

"See you all soon." Thor said before pointing his mighty hammer Mjölnir towards the sky and suddenly a big and loud thunder hit on the ground and absorbed the two Gods. They were gone.

"Come here, doll." You haven't noticed your shoulders were shaking and you were crying as you stared at the sky. Bucky wrapped his arms around your shoulders and brought you back inside the tower. "I think someone needs a few more hours of sleep." He said as he leaned on you and put a kiss against your temple.

"I won't say no to that." You said as you wiped your tears away. You headed to your room and laid on your bed. The winter soldier joined you and big spooned you as you re started crying at the sight of the two stuffed animals he and Loki won for you at the theme park.

"Shh, don't worry. Everything will be fine from now on." Bucky reassured you. "Sleep, doll." You calmed down and stopped shaking.

You closed your eyes and tried to stop thinking about all the moments you had spent with the God of mischief. Your first random encounter with him in the hallway that lead to the library, your first dance at the party, the nickname he gave you during the movie night, the way he discreetly flirted with you like when he wiped the corner of your lips with his finger, the kiss he gave you on the roof, when he teleported you outside and kissed you again after you told him you trusted him, when you defended him against all the Avengers, promised him you'll make everyone change their opinions of him, the little game of personal questions you played and so, so many more things. All these memories kept replaying inside your head. There was one you will probably never forget though...

Loki was the first person who ever said that they loved you.

And you sobbed again. You were inconsolable. There was nothing that you hated most than hurting the people you cared about and especially those who cared about you because God knows there were only a few people like that. You tried to reassure yourself by thinking about how Loki was on his home planet with his family and friends and that he wouldn't need you. You didn't care about hurting yourself with these thoughts, all you wanted was to be reassured **he** was going to be okay. Because after all Bucky was right, things for you will indeed be fine. You still had him, your friends the Avengers, this tower and your job. For Loki you were unsure. You knew that he wished to be King since he was a child so you comforted yourself with that thought. The God of mischief was now king of Asgard _and_ an Avengers.

With that reassuring thought sleep finally consumed you.

  
  


\---

  
  


When you woke up the winter soldier was gone. You checked time: it was almost 6pm. You had literally slept all day, no wonders Bucky probably got bored and left. You wouldn't hold it against him though, you understood. You sat on the edge of your bed and passed your hands on your face. You had a date tonight. You thought it would be a good idea to change your mind and you always had fun everytime you hanged with Bucky so this was a nice opportunity. You wouldn't cancel on him just because you felt down.

You took a shower and then got out of your room to grab something to drink in the kitchen. You had no idea where everybody was or what they were doing at the moment. You stepped inside the kitchen.

"Hey, I was about to knock on your door." You were surprised to find Nat in the kitchen.

"What? Uh, did you need something?" You asked her.

"No, you need _my_ help. Bucky told me about your date."

"Oh. Yeah, I remember. Though he didn't tell me when we would go."

"Don't worry about that, he told me. You have-" She glanced at her watch on her wrist. "Around one hour?" You walked to the fridge and poured yourself a glass of juice. "I'll do your hair and makeup."

"Thank you." You smiled at her and went to sit by her side.

"So, how have you been?" She asked. You sighed deeply.

"Good, if I stop thinking about Loki." You replied truthfully.

"You're still lost?"

"No, no. I'm sure I prefer Bucky it's just... Loki deserved better."

"Let's talk upstairs while I do your hair, okay?" She got up and put her cup and your glass in the sink. You followed her back to your bedroom. "At least you showered already, that's good. We have no time to lose." You sat on a chair while Nat started styling your hair. "Tell me."

"Like I told you weeks ago my feelings for Bucky are stronger that's for sure. When I'm with him I always get giddy, my heart beats fast, you know the symptoms..." You sighed. "But Loki was so nice with me, I never got mad at him, he never disappointed me, he was always here for me." You lowered your gaze. "Nat, he..." You started crying. "Loki told me he loved me." You let out. Her eyes widened.

"What?" You nodded.

"That's the first time in my life, not even my parents had told me..." You sniffled. "And I broke his heart." You let out in a high pitched voice before breaking down in sobs.

"Hey, it's alright." Nat said as she kneeled in front of you. "You were honest with him. It may be sad but that's how life is, sometimes you love someone and they don't love you back or the inverse. You have no reason to feel bad." She reassured you. "He will eventually grow out of his feelings for you and find someone that's for him, just like you found Bucky." She smiled at you. You breathed deeply to calm down.

"I-I hope you're right..." You muttered.

"Hey, trust me I got way more experience than you."

"That we can agree on." You smiled slightly.

"Stop thinking about Loki and think about your night with Bucky. He's been excited and running around all day to plan the perfect evening for you." Nat chuckled. "Never thought I would've seen him like this one day."

"I'm kinda excited about the date too." You revealed and Nat grinned at you.

"I swear if you both fuck it up again I'm locking you and Bucky in a room until you're officially together. Me and Steve are getting tired." You giggled.

"I have a good feeling about this." You smiled.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Here we go!" Nat said after zipping up your dress. You were finally ready. "God, I wish I could see Bucky's face when he's gonna see you." She said as she checked you out to be sure nothing was missing and everything was perfect.

"You're making me nervous." You told her.

"Good, it's good nervosity." She smiled at you. "Alright, it's past 7pm, Bucky is in the parking lot."

"What? I'm late, aren't I?" You panicked.

"Girl, that's the point. You gotta make him wait." She raised one eyebrow at you.

"Why? I don't see the point, I don't like being late or waiting on people." Nat sighed.

"I have so much more to teach you." She said as she grabbed a little bottle of perfume before dousing you a bit. "Alright, get out of here now." She said as she went behind you and gently spanked your butt. You grabbed the doorknob and headed to the elevator.

  
  


The winter soldier had been waiting for you in the parking lot for about fifteen minutes. His right foot had been nervously tapping against the ground. He was leaned against one of the most luxurious car Tony possessed though, rest assured this time, he had asked permission beforehand. Bucky's hair was slicked back, he had shaved his face nicely and he wore a nice two pieces grey/blue suit that matched with his eyes. The super soldier looked handsome and there was no doubt that when you'd see him your jaw would fall open.

Suddenly Bucky heard the elevator doors open and he straightened himself in case it was you. When you walked out you immediately crossed eyes with him. You almost didn't recognize him as you both's eyes widened but then he grinned and you did too. That grin of his, that was your safe place.

You walked towards him, your heels hitting against the ground resonated in the empty parking lot.

"Doll..." He breathed and handed you his hand. You took it and he made you do a little twirl on yourself. "You're- I..." Bucky found himself speechless and he let out a little nervous giggle. "There's no words, you're breathtaking." You blushed as you smiled.

"Thank you, Bucky." You said as you looked into his eyes. "You're very good looking too." You complimented him.

"Come." He guided you to the passenger seat and opened the door of the car for you.

"Thanks." You said to him before getting in. He contourned the car to join his side and finally got in next to you. After Bucky closed the door he turned to you.

"Thank you for coming." He smiled warmly at you.

"I wouldn't have missed it." You said to him. He faced forward and started the car. "So, where are we going?" You asked.

"It's a surprise." Bucky smirked.

"Acting mysterious, huh?" You joked. As he was driving you noticed he kept throwing glances at you and you got curious about it. Did you have something on your face? "Eyes on the road, Bucky."

"I'm sorry I can't stop myself, you're just so beautiful." He knocked air out of your lungs, you didn't expect it. You lowered your gaze as you started blushing. Bucky took your hand with one of his while the other stayed on the wheel. He brought it to his lips and kissed the back of it as he kept watching the road. Then he kept your hand in his on his lap. You stayed like this for a little while.

When you finally arrived to the specific destination Bucky told you to not move and then he got out to open the door for you. You smiled shyly at him and took the hand he was giving you to help you get out of the car.

"Thank you." You looked around you after stepping out of the vehicle.

"Shall we?" He offered you his arm after closing the door. You happily took it and followed him inside- what seemed like a really fancy restaurant.

"Good evening." An elegant waiter greeted you both.

"We have a reservation at the name of Stark." Bucky spoke. You raised one eyebrow. You rememberd you saw him and Tony speak at breakfast, maybe it was about this.

"Of course, please follow me this way." The waiter tensed up at the name of Stark as if Tony could fire him on the spot if he treated you and Bucky badly. The winter soldier kept you close to him until you reached your table. The waiter pulled your chair for you and when you sat he left.

"It's really pretty in here." You commented as you looked around. Everything looked very stylish, the furnitures, the waiters clothes, the other customers and even the music. You were not used to this.

"And still not as pretty as you." Bucky complimented you again and your heart missed a beat once more. You saw the waiter come back at your table with a serving cart that supported a bucket filled with ice and bottles of champagne.

"Mr. Stark sends his regards." The waiter spoke. After he poured your glasses he finally left you alone with the winter soldier.

"Well, you didn't lie when you said you'd take me on a real date." You teased.

"Have I ever lied to you?" Bucky raised one eyebrow. You took a few seconds to think.

"Hmm, you're right I don't think you did." You smiled. You stared into his eyes and suddenly you started to feel a bit nervous, everything was so intimate, it felt like it was the first time you two were together.

"In fact..." Bucky started. "I'd like to apologize again for all the times I hurt you."

"Bucky-" You started with a tired voice.

"No, it's important. I'm sorry, hurting you is the last thing I wanna do." He said as he stared into your eyes and then laid his flesh arm on the table. You took his hand in yours as you smiled.

"I wanted to say that it's in the past. I know I've been harsh with you like when I said- When I asked you if the Bucky I first met was still inside you." You said. "I want to apologize for that as well. I'll never forget what you did for me, since the first day in the tower and you brought me my sandwich back to my room." You smiled as you rememberd. "I know the kind Bucky will always be inside of you because it's who you are and it's who I'm looking at." Bucky leaned on the table and kissed your hand. The table was rather small and you were close to each other, if you moved one of your legs forward you'd touch one of his.

"I'm the luckiest man alive to have you." Bucky said with a gentle smile on his face as he stared into your eyes lovingly.

"I think I'm the one that got lucky here." You said. "You know when I first moved into the tower, I was afraid it would start again. That I was going to get mocked, that people would take advantage of me because of my powers. I remember when Steve asked me if I wanted to have dinner with you, I panicked. I know you thought that the problem was coming from you but really it could've been anybody and I would've refused." You confessed.

"You will never be alone ever again, doll." Bucky promised.

"You're the one that made me change and have a little more confidence in myself. I'll always be grateful to you." You smiled.

"You keep saying things like that to me and it just makes me want to jump on you in the middle of this restaurant." He smirked.

"B-Bucky!" You blushed as you lowered your head, you hoped no one heard that.

"You better be very careful when we climb back in that car." Bucky teased.

"You're crazy." You let out a small laugh that you couldn't hold back.

"Crazy for you." He added and bit onto his lower lip.

"Oh my God. You never stop, do you?" You asked in a fake offended voice. Thankfully the waiter came back at this moment and you gestured the winter soldier to shush. He handed you and Bucky the menus and then left to let you choose.

"What do you feel like eating?" He asked you as he opened his menu.

"I don't know, something light." You muttered as you lowered your head on your menu.

"Oh no, none of that, doll." Bucky raised his head to look at you. "We're just the two of us together and I want to treat you to a nice dinner." He said as he looked at your face.

"Bucky..." You raised your head to look at him.

"I know you're not worried about me but about the people around us, I promise you that none of them will say anything mean to you." Bucky reassured you and he took your hand back in his.

"I-I don't know..." You took a deep breath as you hesitated. You really didn't want to disappoint Bucky. "Okay..." You let out and you saw him smile so brightly you thought you were going to get blinded by his beauty. How did you get someone like him, after all this time you still didn't understand.

"I'm proud of you." Bucky squeezed your hand.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter: the second part of the date!  
> For the few Loki stans who read this fic I just want you to rest assured: I plan on writing a Loki x reader fic that will either follow up after this story or continue from where we left off with him, I'm not sure yet but I will write it after I'm done with this Bucky x reader.  
> Thanks to everyone who enjoyed the chapters with Loki, I'm def gonna miss him in this works, I really loved the parts I wrote with him.


	30. I Love You Too

You've been at the restaurant on your date with the winter soldier for about an hour now. The waiter had brought you your plates some times ago and you were currently still eating.

"No offense to him but this tastes way better than Steve's cooking." Bucky said.

"You're so mean, I like Steve's food." You defended the captain.

"Gotta admit he got better than what he used to make when we were teens." You let out a little laugh. "I threw it all in the trash and treated him to burgers at the local Diner's." Bucky always had that nostalgic smile on his face when he talked about his past with Steve, you found it touching. You had forgotten Bucky had been through some tough things as well, maybe you needed to stop being so hard on him.

"That's so adorable." You let out with a tender smile.

"Doll, are _you_ mocking me now?" He asked with a playful smirk as he raised his eyes to look at yours.

"I wouldn't, I'm sincere." You said as you looked at him. "You've always taken care of others around you and that's something that moves me deeply. I love that about you." You confessed. Bucky was taken by surprise and started blushing, he didn't expect you to say something like this.

"T-Thank you..." He blurted out. That made him feel good about himself, it's like he hasn't noticed until you pointed it out. You smiled warmly at him. "A-Anyway!" Bucky straightened himself back on his chair. "Are you enjoying your food?"

"Hmm." You nodded. "Do you want to try it?"

"Sure." He accepted. You grabbed your plate and approached it so he could pick it with his fork but he stopped you. "Feed me."

"W-What?!" Your eyes widened. You thought you misheard.

"Feed me." Bucky repeated with a playful smile on his face.

"Bucky, there's people around." You said discreetly to him.

"And what about it? They probably think we're a normal couple on a normal date. It's a normal thing to do." He explained.

"But we're not a couple!" You whispered.

"We're not?" The winter soldier raised one eyebrow. You rolled your eyes.

"T-That's not the point, it's embarrassing." You stuttered.

"Please?" He pleaded you with an innocent look that you knew was probably just an act. And yet you couldn't resist again. You let out a sigh and picked up your fork.

"I can't stand you." You said to him and he let out a low chuckle. You picked some food with the fork and raised your arm a little. "C'mon, do it quickly. Open your mouth." You ordered him with an annoyed look. Bucky smiled before opening his mouth. You fed him and he let out a pleasant hum that made you blush. He was definitively doing this on purpose.

"You're right, it's really good." He commentated. "Do you want to try mine?" He asked.

"No." You pouted.

"C'mon. Open up, doll." Bucky said as he brought his fork towards your face. "It tastes better if I feed you." God, he was saying such stupid things you couldn't help laughing. You looked at him before opening your mouth and then he fed you. "So?"

"Hmm, good indeed." You said after you chewed. Bucky stared at you for a little while until it started getting embarrassing for you. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"You're just so stunning. I can't take my eyes off you." He had a stupid grin on his face. You blushed harder and decided to take a sip of your drink. "I don't like the way this restaurant is designed, I want to be next to you."

"Bucky, I'm begging you to not get up." You said as you facepalmed. You hated how you _knew_ he could do it if he wanted to. "Give me your hand." You laid your arm on the table as you smiled at him in hope to distract him. He smiled back before resigning himself and giving you his hand.

"I'm glad I have you back." He confessed.

"Me too, Bucky. I don't want to lose you." You admitted. You gently approached your right leg to his under the table. The winter soldier seemed surprised but he said nothing. Instead you felt his leg lean against yours.

  
  


After a little while you had finished your dinner and you were currently sharing a dessert together. You didn't see time pass, you were having a great time with Bucky and you were really glad you went to this date. You felt so comfortable you didn't even care about the people around you anymore, Bucky made you feel secure and reassured.

"Hmm." He moaned quietly. "I don't ever want to eat anything if I'm not being fed by you." Bucky smirked as he looked seductively into your eyes.

"You're exaggerating." You giggled after you put down the spoon you just fed him with.

"Promise you I'm not, doll. From now on I won't touch any cutlery anymore." You smiled at his idiocy.

"You're such an idiot." You said playfully.

"Your idiot." He corrected. Your heart missed a beat.

"I-I'm gonna wash my hands before we leave." You stuttered as you got up. Bucky watched you walk away with a small smile on his face.

When you came back he had paid the note already and was waiting for you standing next to the table. He put his hand in the lower of your back and guided you towards the exit. You said goodbye to the waiter and then left.

"I hope you had a good time." Bucky said to you as you walked towards the car.

"I did. Thank you." You smiled at him. "My best date ever."

"You've never been to another date." He chuckled.

"Alright. You tell me how it went since you've had dates before." You raised one eyebrow. He shrugged and you gasped. You gave his arm a small tap. "Bucky!" You saw him crack up next to you.

"How do you always fall so easily for these?" He laughed as he opened the car door for you. You got in and he quickly joined you on the driver's side then he started the car.

You've been on the road for quite some time now and this seemed weird to you.

"We're not going back to the tower, are we?" You asked him.

"No." He smirked.

"Where are you taking me?"

"It's a surprise." He replied. A surprise? Okay, he picked your curiosity now. You looked by the window and stared at the city lights in the night. It looked really pretty. You felt Bucky take your hand in his and you glanced at him before smiling. "My beautiful doll." You heard him say softly and it warmed your heart.

You weren't in the city anymore and the car kept going up. Where was Bucky taking you?

"You're not kidnapping me, are you?" You joked.

"Don't give me ideas. I might have to if it's the only way I'll have you all to myself." You bit onto your lower lip. Bucky drove some more and then he finally stopped the car.

"Where are we?" You asked. The winter soldier didn't reply, he got out the car and then went to your side to help you out.

"Close your eyes." He asked you.

"What?"

"Please." You looked at him nervously before closing your eyes. After all, you did trust him. Bucky took your hand and made you take a few steps forward. "Don't move from here and keep your eyes closed." You sensed him walk away from you. Suddenly you heard music and your eyebrows raised. It was definitively coming from the car that wasn't that far away from where you walked. The notes were slow, you liked the tune. Bucky came back next to you and turned your body a little bit. "Open your eyes now."

"Wow..." You let out. You were on a hill and in front of your eyes laid an incredible view. You could see the whole city from where you stood. The lights were shining brightly and your eyes illuminated.

"May I have this dance?" Bucky asked you with a tender smile on his face as he walked in front of you and handed you his hand. You grinned as you nodded.

"Yes!" You accepted happily. The winter soldier put his metal arm behind your back and gently grabbed your hand with his flesh one. He sticked his body to yours and then you started dancing slowly. You felt like you were in a dream, everything was perfect. You stared into his eyes like he stared at yours, with love. You stayed silent for a little while, just listening to the music and looking at each other until naturally you leaned onto each other and finally your lips met.

Bucky kissed you softly while he rocked you against him, your hearts were beating fast against your ribcages and butterflies fluttered inside your stomaches. You slowly broke the kiss and stared into each other's eyes with smiles on your faces.

"I love you [Y/N], my beautiful doll." Bucky finally confessed. He knocked air out of your lungs. Your eyes widened with surprise before your expression changed and your lips curved into a warm smile.

"I love you too, Bucky." You had, at long last, admitted. This time it was Bucky who looked shocked. His pupils dilated as he stared at the cheerful expression you wore on your face. He let out a sigh of relief before wrapping his arms around your waist and lifting you off the ground.

"I'm the happiest man alive!" He said excitedly against you. Bucky put you back on your feet and gently held your face between his palms. "I love you so much, doll. So, so much." He sticked his forehead against yours as he kept repeating the words to you. He needed you to really believe him.

"Me too, Bucky." Tears appeard in the corner of your eyes. This was real, you loved Bucky and he loved you too. You wrapped your arms around his neck and kept him close to you. You wanted to feel him, to smell him, to touch him. He was here.

"Say it again." He asked you with glee.

"I love you." You smiled at him as you blushed.

"Again." He grinned.

"I love you."

"Again." He was holding back his excitement.

"I love you, Bucky!" You said louder. Bucky let out a joyous laugh as he lifted you off the ground again. He squeezed you tightly against him.

"Mine." He breathed as he started kissing you everywhere on your face. "All of this is all mine." You giggled between his kisses.

"You're tickling me." You smiled.

"Come!" Bucky hurried you with enthusiasm as he grabbed your hand.

"Where?" You asked.

"In the car. I did warn you at the restaurant to be careful, doll." He smirked playfully. You followed him as you giggled. Bucky opened the door of the backseats of the car, he climbed in first and then handed you his hand to join him. You were about to sit next to him but he grabbed you by your waist and made you sit horizontally on his lap.

"Bucky, I'm too hea-" He shushed you by crashing his lips on yours. The winter soldier kissed you deeply and ran his metal hand on the side of your body as the flesh one kept your head in place.

"I don't care about your weight. All of this, all of you-" He smirked against your lips with half lidded eyes. "Is all mine babydoll and trust me, I have what it takes to handle you properly." You blushed profusely as your heart beat faster. Bucky leaned to kiss you again then he ran his tongue on your lower lip. He suddenly grabbed your butt and you gasped against his mouth, he took the opportunity of your parted lips to put his tongue in your mouth. Fuck, you started to feel hot. You put your hand against his chest and soon enough it wandered inside his shirt. Your caressed his naked skin as he french kissed you deeply.

"Bucky..." You moaned quietly.

"Don't say it like that, not right now..." He whispered. The winter soldier had a hard time keeping his control to not jump on you like a wild animal in this car at the moment. His head went in the crook of your neck, Bucky kissed, licked and bit you there making you squirm on his lap. He went further down and left other lovebites on your collarbone and naked shoulder. The metal hand that was on your buttcheek traveled to your waist and rested just under one of your breasts.

"Hmm..." Your hand went through Bucky's soft hair as he kissed your cleavage. He was very soft and you really enjoyed what he was doing to you.

"Doll... I want you so badly." He whispered against your warm skin. You bit onto your lower lip.

"I-I do too, Bucky. Please, trust me." The winter soldier raised his head to look at you. "I-I want you to be my first, I-I'm just... terrified. I'm sorry, there's no other word." You said with an anxious expression. Bucky wrapped his arms around your waist and kissed your cheek.

"Don't worry, I understand." He reassured you. "I'll do everything for you to feel comfortable." You smiled tenderly at each other. "Let's head back." You nodded. You got off him and then you both took back your seats at the front. Before starting the car Bucky took your hand in his and kissed your palm, he rememberd you loved that. "I'll do everything for you, doll."

"I love you, Bucky." You repeated again with a smile. Then you approached _his hand_ to your lips and kissed it. Bucky smiled before leaning on you and putting a kiss on your forehead then he started the car.

  
  


\---

  
  


You walked through the parking lot to join the elevator, you felt as light as a feather. It's as if all your problems and worries got lifted off your shoulders. Bucky held your hand as you stepped inside the lift and when the doors closed he jumped on you to kiss. The winter soldier gently pushed your body against the elevator wall and held your head between his palms. You put your hands on his sides and smiled against the kiss.

You stepped out and walked towards the living space. It was almost midnight but you didn't think everyone was asleep already and when you heard voices in the hallway you knew you were right.

"Hey." Bucky announced your presences with a grin.

"Hi." bruce greeted you both with a friendly smile.

"You both look so cute, it looks like you went to prom." Nat commentated and you giggled.

"You look happy." Steve noticed.

"How did it go?" Tony asked.

"It was great." You smiled. "By the way, thank you for... everything Tony." He waved his hand as if to say it was nothing.

"Any news to share with us?" Nat raised an eyebrow with a little smirk.

"Yes... I think we do." Bucky said to her before looking at you and smiling. You stared into his eyes lovingly and then he leaned to kiss you in front of all the Avengers.

"WOO!" Nat cheered and then she highfived Steve.

"That's great." Bruce said.

"I'm happy for you both." Steve added. You broke the kiss and blushed shyly as you looked at everyone.

"Well, it's getting late kids." Tony said before getting up from the couch. "See you all tomorrow."

"I'm gonna bring my lady back to her chambers." Bucky joked and you rolled your eyes.

"Goodnight." You waved at them before Bucky pulled you with him by the hand.

"Do what you gotta do and come in my room." He said to you with a grin as you walked in the hallway of your floor. You nodded and grabbed the doorknob of your door.

When you got in your room you walked to the bathroom and took off your dress and heels. You washed the makeup off your face, brushed your teeth and then headed to your closet to grab pyjamas. You put on booty shorts and a tank top without forgetting to take your jacket. Before you joined Bucky you rememberd to grab your pillow and your blanket.

"It's me." You said as you knocked on his door.

"Come in." The winter soldier replied instantly. What the fuck? You walked in and your eyes immediately locked on him. Bucky was wearing a pair of grey sweatpants and... that's it? He was completely shirtless in front of you. You blushed at the sight and he didn't miss it, his lips curved into a smirk. "Enjoying the view, doll?"

"Please wear a shirt." You said as you looked away.

"Don't want to, it's hot in here." He teased.

"Yeah and I'm afraid you're making it worse." You replied. Bucky let out a low chuckle and approached you.

"Maybe you should remove that jacket then. Don't want my doll getting a heatstroke." He put a hand on your shoulder. Oh, you knew what he was doing and you hated it. Bucky was clearly flirting and seducing you and it _**worked**_. You took a deep breath before taking the zipper between your fingers and rolling it down. Bucky looked at you as he bit on his lower lip. You took off your jacket and put it on the chair in front of his desk. "Pick your side." Bucky smiled at you and pointed at the bed.

"Such a gentleman." You rolled your eyes. You put your pillow next to his and hopped in. Bucky joined you on the bed and turned the lights off.

"Come here." He opened his arms.

"Will you please wear something?" You asked again. Bucky wrapped his arms around you anyway and pulled you close to his chest.

"Will you stop pretending you're not attracted by me." He smirked.

"You're so cocky." You huffed. The winter soldier took one of your hands and put it on his flesh bicep.

"You're free to touch as much as you want." You blushed but you didn't move your hand away. Bucky smirked, he rememberd you loved his muscled arms. "Actually..." He said as he approached you and buried his head in the crook of your neck. "Feel free to touch me as much as you want and everywhere you want." He whispered next to your ear and you felt a chill run down your spine.

"Bucky..." You let out quietly. He ran his lips on the side of your neck and kissed your skin there softly while his hands rested on your sides.

"I love you, doll." The winter soldier repeated. He towered you so his head could be at your level and he stared deeply into your eyes.

"Me too." You wrapped your arms around his neck. Bucky smiled before leaning and kissing you passionately. "Thank you for the date, I had a great time." You looked at him with stars in your eyes and a lovely smile on your face.

"Anytime, doll." Bucky kissed your forehead and then brought you close to him after laying back next to you. "Sweet dreams."

"Goodnight, Bucky." You put a kiss against his collarbone and then closed your eyes.

 


	31. A Goddess

"Hey~" You muttered in a sleepy voice after you opened your eyes and found the winter soldier staring at your face.

"Good morning, babydoll." Bucky smiled at you and then leaned to put a kiss on your nose. "You're so pretty when you sleep."

"Have you been watching me for a long time?" You asked as you blushed, that was a bit embarrassing.

"Hmm, long enough to hear you talk in your sleep and see you drool on your pillow." Your eyes widened, you wiped your mouth and chin with the back of your hand but there was nothing.

"Stop making fun of me." You whined.

"You were saying my name and asking me to stay with you." He said and proceeded to badly imitate you.

"As if." You rolled your eyes as he laughed. "I don't need you." You said.

"You don't?" Bucky stared into your eyes and you bit onto your lower lip.

"You know that's not true." You finally revealed. The winter soldier grinned and sticked his body to yours. He wrapped his arms around your waist and hugged you against him.

"Do you know what you are?" He asked as he stared at your collarbone.

"What am I?" You asked him as your brows furrowed with confusion. He raised his head back to your level and looked at your eyes.

"My girlfriend." Bucky smiled warmly and you smiled back at him. "Because I love you."

"You're my boyfriend." You said as you brought your hand to his cheek. "And I love you too." You both stared at each other's eyes excitedly and happily before Bucky leaned on you and put a chaste kiss on your lips.

"I don't wanna leave this bed, I wanna stay here with you all day." He confessed. "Do you have anything to do today?" He asked you.

"Not that I know of." You replied and he smirked.

"Then nothing can actually stop me from keeping you here between my arms, is there?" Bucky asked as he tightened his grip on you.

"You're gonna get bored." You said.

"With you? Never." You smiled. "I don't see time pass when I'm with you."

"You're cute but that won't get you anywhere, Bucky." You giggled.

"You're underestimating me, doll." He raised an eyebrow. "What time even is it?" He said before leaning the other way and checking the time. "Hm, the others must be up already. Do you want to take your shower with me?"

"This, again?" You asked surprised. "Why do you want to take a shower with me so badly?"

"Why wouldn't I? I dream of one thing only, doll, and it's running my hands all over you." You blushed profusely.

"Y-You're not ashamed of anything, are you?" He chucked next to you before biting your shoulder playfully. "Ow!"

"You drive me crazy, doll." Bucky confessed. "I want to touch you just as much as I want you to touch me." You gulped as you looked at him, your face was as red as a beet.

"L-Listen, soon okay? I promise you it will happen. I-I want it too I just need to mentally prepare myself." You said to him. Bucky took one of your hands in his and brought it to his lips.

"Doll, I don't want to do anything if you're not 100% ready. I'll wait as long as you need me to." You smiled at him as he reassured you.

"Thank you, Bucky. I-I really appreciate." You said. He leaned on you and put a kiss on your forehead.

"Alright, I'll go take a sad shower by myself before we head downstairs." He joked before getting out of bed. You rolled your eyes and got up as well.

"See you in a few." You smiled at him before grabbing his doorknob to join your own room.

  
  


\---

  
  


"You two reek of love and it disgusts me." Tony said as he watched you feed Bucky fresh slices of fruits. You were seated next to each other but your legs were laying on Bucky's lap and he held them with his metal arm. You and the winter soldier were all smiles and giggles, completely ignoring everyone else around the table.

"Let them, they've been waiting weeks for this." Nat defended you two.

"Did someone say something?" You asked, you weren't paying attention to what they were talking about. Tony rolled his eyes and huffed. You looked at Steve.

"Don't worry about it." The captain said to you with a smile. You reported your attention back to the winter soldier.

"Wait." He said before you put another piece of food in his mouth. Bucky took the fruit slice you were holding and put it between his lips before approaching his head to yours so you could share it together. You smiled at the super soldier before putting your lips against his and taking the other side of the fruit with your mouth. You bit into the slice to break it in half and then kissed each other as you chewed.

"Alright, I've seen enough." Tony said as he got up. "If anyone is looking for me, I'll be in the lab. Bruce?"

"I'm coming." The doctor said as he got up as well and took his mug of coffee with him.

"Something came up?" Bucky asked after you and him naturally broke the kiss and watched Tony and Bruce leave the kitchen. Nat and Steve laughed.

"You both are so adorable." Nat smiled and you blushed as if you suddenly realized what you were doing with Bucky in front of everyone.

"It's my doll, she's glowing." Bucky said as he stared lovingly at you with stars in his eyes.

"I told you she'd come back." Nat said. Bucky took your hand and kissed your palm. Your heart was beating so fast, you were the happiest you ever were in your life.

"It took time but I'm glad you both finally realized your feelings for each other." Steve said. The captain was truly happy for his best friend, he had seen him at the lowest of the low during the times when you were mad at him. Bucky was a good man and he deserved to be happy.

"Feelings is not strong enough." Bucky started. "I'm in love with her." He revealed to his two friends and your eyes widened as you blushed and your heart missed a beat. You didn't expect him to confess out of the blue like that in front of other people.

"Bucky..." You said his name in a breath, he had literally knocked air out of your lungs. Fuck, you didn't care if Steve and Nat were there, you couldn't not say it back now that you knew you felt the same. "I'm in love with you too." You said softy as you smiled shyly at him.

"I'm gonna cry." Nat commentated. Bucky wrapped his arms around your waist and held you close to him. You put a kiss against his temple and hugged him as well. "I don't regret running back and forth between you both to help you."

"And by the way thank you, both of you." You smiled at her and Steve and they smiled back at you. "Ow!" You put your hand on your neck.

"What?" The captain asked you in worry.

"N-Nothing..." You blushed as Bucky chuckled against your neck. "You're really an idiot." You said to the winter soldier and backed away from his grip.

"He bit her." Nat explained to Steve as he still looked confused. The captain lowered his head and sighed.

"Okay. So, what do you guys have planned for today?" He asked to change subject.

"Gonna spend the day with my doll." Bucky grinned.

"Where?" Steve asked.

"In her arms?" Bucky replied. Nat rolled her eyes.

"He meant places." She said.

"This is why I call him an idiot." You said. Bucky glanced in your direction with a raised eyebrow and a smirk on his face. You were so going to regret this. Bucky reported his attention back to Nat and Steve.

"I don't care what we do as long as I can stay with my doll." He said.

"What are you both doing?" You asked the captain.

"We have nothing planned either." He replied.

"Then we can hang out together?" You said.

"Do we have to?" Bucky said as his chin rested on your shoulder.

"Don't be rude." You said to him.

"Oh, I know!" Nat said suddenly. "We can go to the zoo?" She suggested.

"Oh my God, really? Can we?" You asked to Bucky.

"If that's where you wanna go I'll take you there, babydoll." He smiled at you.

"I love you." You said quietly to him before leaning on him and giving your boyfriend a small kiss.

"The zoo it is then." Steve said as he got up.

You cleaned up after yourselves after you had breakfast and then you all headed to your respective rooms to change before meeting up in the parking lot.

"Have you ever been to a zoo?" Bucky asked you in the elevator.

"You're gonna make fun of me if I tell you." You said.

"First time?" He asked with a grin.

"Shut up, Bucky." You huffed.

"You're so adorable." He smiled at you tenderly as he grabbed your hand. You got out of the elevator and got in the car where Nat and Steve were already waiting for you.

"Oh no, you go next to Steve." Nat said to Bucky when he was about to climb next to you. "If I leave you with her in the backseat you're gonna make out during the whole ride."

"You know me so well." The winter soldier chuckled as you blushed.

"Alright, let's go." Steve started the car and you were on your way to the zoo.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Oh God, I forgot how bad it smelled in zoos." Nat said as she pinched the bridge of her nose. You looked around you amazed by everything you saw. You loved the scenery, it reminded you of when you used to be alone in the nature. There were a lot of big trees for the monkeys to climb on, aquatic parks for the sea creatures, you closed your eyes and listened to all the wild sounds. The atmosphere put you at ease.

"Come." Bucky said as he grabbed your hand. He didn't miss the way your eyes shined. You smiled at him and started walking through the zoo.

"This is amazing." You said.

"Is it?" Nat asked with annoyance as she waved a bee away from her face. You stood in front of a fence and waved hello to the lion cubs on the other side.

"They're so adorable." You kneeled when one of them walked towards you.

"Be careful, you're not allowed to touch them." Steve reminded you.

"Bye bye little baby." You spoke to the animal as Bucky looked over you. The winter soldier put his arm over your shoulders after you got up and guided you towards the next stall.

"This is so stupid." You heard an unfamiliar voice say. You turned your head to look where it was coming from. "That dumbass won't even look over there." You saw a kid, probably around twelve years old, complain in front of a fence. He was speaking to a small panda.

"C'mon, let's go." The kid was accompanied by someone else, one of his friends you thought. "There's other animals."

"Wait, check this out." The first kid picked up a rock and suddenly threw it towards the small animal.

"Hey!" You yelled as you ran towards the two teens. But it was too late, the rock hit the baby panda's eye.

"[Y/N]!" You heard your friends call you but you didn't care. You climbed over the fence and walked slowly towards the animal.

"Dude, why did you do this?!" The kid's friend scolded him.

"Hey, you're not allowed there!" Someone said to you but you didn't turn back. You kneeled towards the panda who stayed on the ground.

"Shh... You're going to be okay." You quietly spoke to it. You put your palm over the panda's eye that started swelling and focused on the injury.

"Hey, watch out!" You heard someone else yell. You opened your eyes and a much bigger panda was walking towards you. Probably its mother.

"Fuck!" Bucky cursed before jumping over the fence as well and running towards you but you stopped him. You raised your hand towards the winter soldier and asked him to not make any more abrupt moves.

"It's going to be alright." You spoke. You finished healing the little baby panda and when you checked the wound it was gone. The small animal walked towards its mother and then they both walked away. The big panda was relieved its baby was fine. Bucky came next to you after the animals got away and gently grabbed your arm.

"Don't ever do that." He said to you firmly but he was relieved you were fine. He helped you back on the allowed side of the fence and you both walked towards Steve and Nat who were scolding the two kids along with a manager from the zoo.

"What did you do?" A customer of the zoo asked you. You recognized the voice of the person who warned you about the mother panda.

"I-I uh..." You couldn't reveal your powers to a stranger.

"She's a vet, she just wanted to check if the panda was okay after it got hit with the rock." Bucky covered you. The person nodded and then walked away.

"Thank you." You smiled at the winter soldier.

"Couldn't reveal to him that I'm dating a literal Goddess." Bucky smiled at you and you blushed at his compliment.

"Sorry, I won't do it again." The kid who threw the stone muttered as he lowered his head. His friend pulled him by the arm and they both headed towards the exit. You sighed deeply.

"Kids are terrible." The manager said. "What did you do over there? You're not allowed to climb in their enclosures even if they're in danger. Leave it to our professionals." He said to you. Bucky put his arm around your shoulders.

"It's fine, she's a vet." He repeated. Steve and Nat looked surprised but said nothing.

"Really?" The manager raised one eyebrow. "Then... Do you think you can take a look at one of our turtles? We can't get it checked until next friday and it's one of the stars in here." You looked at Bucky and he just shrugged making you understand that if you wanted to he'd come with you.

"Uh, sure. I guess I can." You said.

"Awesome." He smiled. "You and your group can follow me."

The manager brought you to a restricted area of the zoo and then made you wait with the others in a small room that looked like a veterinary cabinet. When he came back he was holding a cage with the turtle in it.

"Hey, you." You smiled at it excitedly.

"He's named Jacob."

"Can I?" You asked.

"Of course, go ahead." You opened the cage and took Jacob out. He was very heavy and seemed weak, you checked its body for injuries but it had nothing. So the problem had to come from inside. You eyed Bucky and made him understand discreetly that you needed to be alone with the turtle without the manager seeing what you were about to do. Bucky nodded and turned to Nat.

"Get him out of here." He whispered to her.

"I'm really sorry but I need to use the toilets so badly, I don't remember where they are." Nat said.

"I'll come with y-" She stepped on Steve's foot and he shut his mouth.

"It's fine, I can stay here with Jacob." You said to the manager.

"Alright, follow me ma'am." The manager walked out with Nat following behind.

"You're so slow." Bucky teased Steve who rolled his eyes.

"I think Jacob swallowed something." You reported their attention back to the turtle. "I need to reach its stomach but I can't lay it on its carapace."

"I'll hold it." Bucky said.

"Thank you. Just lift the turtle a little so I can lay my palm under it." Steve came closer too and he and Bucky both held the turtle and lifted it off the table.

"Alright, here we go. You'll be fine soon." You spoke to it.

"You should hurry before they come back." You nodded and finally placed your palm under Jacob. You closed your eyes and let your powers flow through you. You could feel it, something was stuck. The turtle started moving its limbs and opened its mouth as if it was about to vomit.

"Right there, Jacob, you can do it." You reassured the turtle. Your palm moved from the stomach to the throat and suddenly Jacob threw something out of its mouth.

"Ew, what's that?" Bucky asked as he looked over the object.

"Oh my God, you had that inside of you?" You removed your hand after you healed the turtle and the super soldiers placed the animal back on the table.

"Looks like a bottle cap." Steve said. At that moment the manager and Nat came back.

"So, what's wrong with Jacob?" He asked.

"He had that inside of him." You picked the bottle cap and showed it to him. The manager's eyes widened.

"How did you get it out??" He asked with shock.

"She's the best vet." Bucky replied with a small proud smile.

"Jacob is fine now." You said.

"Wow, I don't know how to thank you. I'm gonna cancel on the other vet who was supposed to come friday and give you his paycheck."

"No, really, there's no need to. I'm glad I could help Jacob." You smiled humbly.

"Let me at least give you and you friends free passes to the aquariums and food coupons. We got a restaurant as well." He said.

"We won't say no to that." Nat replied in your place.

"Awesome. Let me bring Jacob back to his habitat and I'll hand you these passes and coupons." The manager put Jacob back in his cage and took him outside.

"Are you okay? I know healing drains your energy." Bucky asked you.

"Hm, I'm fine." You smiled at him.

"You're amazing." He said to you before putting a kiss on your forehead. "A literal angel."

"Bucky, you're embarrassing me." You blushed.

"It's only the truth." He smiled as he caressed your cheek

"Come on you two lovebirds." Nat hurried you both to go back to the manager.

 


	32. Reassured

After you were done looking at the animals you sat around a picnic table with your teammates at the zoo restaurant. You didn't expect your day to go like this and you even got to touch a few animals so you didn't regret it, you were having a great time.

"I'm starving." Bucky said next to you.

"What are you craving?" You asked.

"Besides you?" He smirked playfully. "I don't know. I'll eat anything as long as you're feeding me."

"Bucky, I can't feed you for the rest of my life." You said with a laugh.

"Why not? You'll always be by my side." He said.

"Is that really what you want?" You asked with a little smile on your face.

"Yes." He said and then took your hand. "I want to be with you for the rest of my life." Bucky smiled at you. Your heart missed a beat and your eyes widened. You felt like crying. You hid your face against his chest and hugged him. The winter soldier put a kiss on the top of your head.

"I really love you." You said as you raised your head to look at him.

"My beautiful doll, you can't imagine all the things I'd do for you." Bucky said as he stared into your eyes. He leaned on you and kissed you passionately.

"Uh hum." Nat coughed loudly. Steve was looking the other way.

"S-Sorry..." You said with a light blush after you broke the kiss.

"So, what are we eating?" Nat reported everyone's attention back to the menu.

"H-How about pizza? [Y/N], you like pizza?" Steve seemed so embarrassed.

"S-Sure. Pizza is great." You replied. Bucky buried his head in the crook of your neck and nuzzled your skin there but you pushed him away with your hands on his shoulders.

"Bucky!" Steve suddenly called out to his best friend. "How about you come with me to order over the counter?" You gestured him to go and he resigned himself. He got up and followed Steve.

"I-I'm really sorry." You said to Nat as you passed a hand on your face.

"It's fine sweetheart, I'd rather watch your embarrassing make out sessions than see you ignore each other and be sad." Nat said to you.

"H-He just can't keep his hands or _lips_ off me. It's not that I hate it or anything, really, but I wish he held himself back in front of you guys." You confessed.

"Have you two... done it?" She asked and your eyes widened as you blushed profusely.

"I-I..." You stuttered. "No..."

"How far have you gone?"

"Well... We kissed and we hug... Sometimes I sleep in his room but we keep our clothes on." You said.

"Honey, you're gonna break him if you don't take things a tad faster." Nat said to you. "No wonder he can't stop touching you, that boy is horny."

"N-Nat!" You choked on your spit. "Oh my God..."

"It's the truth. Why haven't you-"

"I-I'm scared." You said to her. "I'm afraid it's gonna hurt, I'm afraid of not knowing how to do things, I'm scared of him seeing me naked and I'm terrified of him finding me repulsive." You let out with a sad face. "I know that if anything goes bad I will run away far from this city, country probably."

"You know he's not like that, [Y/N], he loves you for who you are and he doesn't care about your appearance. The only thing Bucky wants is to make sweet love to you and probably make you scream his name."

"Nat! Are you mad?!" You lowered your head in shame and put your hands on it. She smiled.

"C'mon, you know I'm right." She reassured you.

"Right about what?" Bucky asked and took his place next to you. Steve put the pizza on the table and sat next to Nat. You glared at her to not say anything about your conversation.

"[Y/N] was telling me about how she thinks pineapples go on pizza and I told her that it was a disgrace." She smirked.

"Uh... Well, we took cheese. It's neutral." Steve said.

"You want me to get you a pizza with pineapples on it?" Bucky asked you.

"No!" You said louder than you intended to. "No, this is perfect." You smiled at him reassuringly.

"Aw, that's so sweet." Nat commentated and you rolled your eyes. Steve handed to everyone water bottles and you took a sip while Nat glanced at the pizza.

"Oh no, I prefer thin crust. I feel like I'm eating bread if the crust is too thick." She crossed her arms on her chest.

"I like thick." Bucky said and glanced at you which made you choke on your water bottle. Okay, this time you were sure of it. He did it on purpose, just like on that day on your first week living in the tower.

"Okay, how about you and [Y/N] just go order the pizza you want?" Steve said a bit annoyed and you and Nat started laughing.

"Relax, this is fine." Nat said to the captain.

"Thank you for the food." You said and Steve finally relaxed and smiled.

"Alright, now dig in before it goes cold."

  
  


\---

  
  


When you arrived in the parking lot, you and Bucky left Nat and Steve and headed to your floor.

"I feel so tired." You whined.

"I told you to sleep in the car." Bucky said.

"How could I? You were keeping me awake by kissing me and sucking my neck." You defended yourself and he chuckled next to you.

"Do you want to take a nap now?" You nodded. "With me?"

"Are you gonna let me sleep this time?" He shrugged and you rolled your eyes.

"I promise you you're gonna sleep." The winter soldier grinned. "I'll hold you in my arms and caress your hair." He said while looking at you.

"T-That doesn't sound too bad." You stepped out of the elevator and he took your hand to guide you in his room. "Wait, I wanna change in more comfortable clothes and take a shower too, I probably smell like the zoo right now."

"Doesn't bother me."

"Yeah, well, it bothers me Bucky. Can you wait 10 minutes?" You asked him.

"We could make that 5 if you let me hel-"

"See you later." You threw at him before grabbing your doorknob and entering your room.

After taking a quick shower and changing into a pair of booty shorts and a shirt you left your room. Fifteen minutes after you left him you knocked on the winter soldier's door.

"One more minute doll and I was going to burst through that door of yours." Bucky said as he leaned on the doorframe with a smirk on his face. You noticed he had probably taken a shower as well, his hair was a bit wet.

"Aw, did you get worried?" You teased.

"About you? Always." He erased the playful smile off your face, his sincerity moved you. "I mean, you could've needed my help. What if you slipped in your bathtub or got shampoo in your eye?" Bucky joked. "You need me." You rolled your eyes and stepped inside his room.

"I'm way too tired for this right now." You didn't even wait for his permission to enter his room or go into his bed, you just did.

"Alright, I got you." He joined you.

"You wore a shirt, we're progressing." You said sarcastically.

"You got one thing to say and it's off." Bucky smirked.

"No! Please, this is good." You replied quickly. You smiled at the winter soldier as you approached him and he wrapped you in his arms. Bucky nuzzled your neck and it sent chills down your spine.

"You smell good." He smiled satisfactorily.

"You don't regret waiting now, do you?" You giggled. You gently caressed his cheek and then leaned to kiss him softly. Bucky let out a pleasing hum against your lips which made you smile.

"I love you [Y/N]." Bucky said after breaking the kiss.

"Me too." You felt his arms get tighter around your waist. You rested your head against his chest and closed your eyes, his heart was beating fast and it made you feel things. It reassured you that the winter soldier was feeling the exact same thing as you. Then you felt his hand go in your hair and he started gently rubbing your scalp, it relaxed you. "Hmm." You hummed softly.

"Does that feel good?" He whispered. You nodded as you caressed the side of his torso with your hand. You tangled your legs with his and before you knew it you were gone, rocked in Morpheus' arms.

  
  


\---

  
  


You woke up first. Bucky was sleeping serenely, his metal hand was still around your waist and the other one lost in your hair. You felt warm and secure against him. You approached the winter soldier and left a trail of small chaste kisses on his collarbone, you went further up until you reached his face. You went on your fours above him.

"Bucky~" You called out to him softly between two kisses on his face.

"Doll?" He replied in a sleepy voice. The winter soldier's eyes were still closed when he wrapped his arms around your back and brought you against him. Bucky buried his face in the crook of your neck and inhaled your scent. He felt at home.

"Have you slept well?" You asked.

"Hmm." He confirmed. "Though, I prefer this." He said before reversing your positions and laying you on your back. A small gasp escaped your lips, you didn't see it coming. "You're gorgeous." Bucky stared at your face after opening his eyes. You looked rested after the nap and your disheveled hair made you adorable. You smiled at him as you brought your hand to his cheek and caressed it. As always Bucky turned his head and left a kiss in your palm.

"I love you." You said to him and you saw his face illuminate.

"I'll never get tired of hearing that." Bucky grinned. "How about you though, did you enjoy your nap?"

"I did." You smiled. "Best place to sleep is in your arms." You said.

"Don't say things like that to me, doll, you know what it does to me." Bucky said as he laid back next to you.

"I never slept better." You continued playfully.

"Really?" He asked with one raised eyebrow.

"Only the truth." You replied with a smile.

"You drive me crazy, doll." Bucky sticked his body to yours and laid a hand on your stomach. You shivered under his touch, you weren't used to be touched there.

"I feel the same, Bucky. I'm always thinking about you, thinking of the stuff you say to me, the way you touch me, they all drive me crazy as well." You said. "I'm really glad I met you."

"Doll..." Bucky smiled tenderly before leaning on you and catching your mouth with his to kiss you lovingly. "I don't wanna move from here."

"I mean, do we have to?" You asked playfully. "We don't really have to eat dinner with everybody, we can stay here and maybe watch something?" You suggested.

"You want that?" He asked you. Bucky seemed surprised by your idea.

"Why wouldn't I want it?" You asked.

"Don't know... Thought you'd be getting sick of me after spending so much time in my company."

"Wh-" You sat on the bed and looked at him. "Don't ever think that, Bucky. I love spending time with you." You said to him. "You're the person I trust the most and with who I have the most fun. Without you I..." You bit onto your lower lip. "I probably would've never left my room." You smiled playfully at him. "I'm not the only one who needs reassurance, huh?" Bucky rolled his eyes. You went on your fours above him again and kissed his forehead. "I love you Bucky, these are not words I'm just throwing around."

"I'm sorry, I-"

"Shh." You interrupted him. "You don't need to apologize for needing reassurance." You took his flesh hand and put his palm against your chest. "Do you feel that?" He nodded. Your heart was beating fast. "I'm in love with you Bucky." The winter soldier sat on the bed as well and then he brought you between his legs. You wrapped your limbs around him and hugged him tightly.

"I'll die for you, doll." He said. You gasped against his shoulder.

"Don't you dare!" You told him. "I'm not living this life without you." You backed up and put your hands on each side of his head. What you saw broke your heart, Bucky had tears appearing in the corner of his eyes. "Bucky..." He silenced you by kissing you again. His kiss was passionate and deep. He put his hand behind your head to keep you in place as he kissed you.

"I'm so in love with you." Bucky breathed against your lips. You rested your forehead against his and he nuzzled your nose.

"I'm the happiest I've ever been in my life since I'm with you, Bucky." You smiled tenderly as you grabbed both of his hands. "So, do you wanna watch a movie with me?" You asked.

"You bet I do." He finally grinned.

  
  


\---

  
  


You and Bucky went downstairs to quickly grab something to eat and when you saw everyone was having dinner in the kitchen you decided to finally join them. When you were done you went back in the winter soldier's room. You had previously grabbed your laptop that was in your room to watch the movie. When you decided on a film that you both liked you clicked play.

During the movie you and Bucky were very tactile, you leaned on him, he had his arm over your shoulders, you held his hand, he grabbed your thigh, you couldn't get your hands off each other. Suddenly a sex scene started playing and things got very awkward **for you**. You turned your head the other way and the winter soldier couldn't help laughing when he noticed.

"Stop laughing or I swear I'm out of here." You pouted.

"My sweet innocent doll." He teased and put a kiss against your temple.

"Oh my God, how long is this?" You said as you reported your attention back on the screen for a second but turned your head again when you saw that the scene wasn't finished. Bucky put two fingers under your chin and raised your head so he could look at your face. You were as red as a beet. Suddenly a loud moan was heard coming from your laptop and you closed your eyes. This was way too embarrassing.

"You're not curious about how that feels?" Bucky asked you with a smirk. "I could show you." You opened your eyes and looked into his. You thought back about what Nat told you earlier in the day, you also knew Bucky wanted this and everytime he tried something with you you stopped him. You bit onto your lower lip as you thought quickly. "Doll?" He called out to you.

"I-I do, Bucky, really... I just don't know if I'm ready." You said as your brows furrowed sadly.

"You won't know if you don't try." He said and fuck, he was right. "I know you're scared so how about we start slowly?"

"What do you mean?" You asked.

"We can start by just touching each other and you see if you like it or not." The winter soldier suggested. "We don't have to go through the whole act."

"Isn't that like... frustrating for you?" You asked him.

"Don't worry about me, I'll be fine." He smiled "You'll see it won't be much different from what we already do." Bucky reassured you. You closed your eyes and took a deep breath.

"Okay." You finally let out. His eyes widened with surprise but he quickly erased that expression off his face and replaced it with a happy smile. Bucky closed your laptop and put it on the nighstand next to the bed.

"Is there anything you want or need before we start?" Bucky asked you.

"Just keep the lights off please."

"I won't touch any of those light switches, doll." He reassured you, the lights were already off while you were watching the movie. "Also don't worry about doing anything you don't like, you tell me if anything doesn't feel good or if you want me to stop and I will." You smiled at him.

"I-I know, I trust you." You said to him.

"I promise you I'll take very good care of you." Bucky said as he leaned on you and put a kiss on your lips.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't miss next chapter :)


	33. I'm Ready

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ayy, we hit the big 100k!  
> So here it is, at long last, a full chapter of smut.  
> You're free to either read it or skip it if it makes you uncomfortable.  
> Anyways, hope you enjoy as always ☆

"Come here, babydoll." Bucky laid you on the bed and approached you. The winter soldier put his hand against your cheek and then leaned to kiss you. His lips felt soft and warm against yours, you loved Bucky's kisses, they were always passionate and full of love. He guided the hand that was on your cheek down your neck and shoulder until it rested on your waist. He gently pinched your side and you squirmed against him.

Bucky ran his tongue on your lower lip and you opened your mouth to let him play with your tongue. They danced sensually inside your mouth and you couldn't help humming of pleasure against your boyfriend's lips. While the winter soldier was distracting you with kisses his hand continued its adventure on your body. Bucky caressed your stomach through your shirt and then went further up until he nicely cupped one of your breasts. He started gently fondling it and suddenly you felt hot, you needed more.

"Bucky..." You breathed against his mouth.

"Everything okay?" He asked.

"Hmm. I-I just want to remove my bra." You blushed. He smirked against your lips.

"Let me take care of that." The hand that was on your breast went behind your back and under your shirt. Bucky unclasped your bra with one hand and then you proceeded to take off the item of clothing without removing your shirt. You took his hand and put it back on your chest while you kissed. Bucky massaged your breasts with his two hands until your nipples were poking against the fabric of your shirt, soon enough he circled them with his fingers and he had you moaning under his touch.

"Fuck..." You cursed after the winter soldier broke the kiss and buried his head in the crook of your neck. He left new hickeys on your skin there as he continued to fondle your breasts through your clothes.

"Doll-" Bucky breathed against your skin. "Can I lift your shirt a bit? I promise you I can't see anything in this darkness. I just want to kiss you there." Your heart missed a beat. Oh God, fuck, you really wanted him to do that. It was indeed very dark in his bedroom, you could make out some shadows thanks to the moonlight but that was it.

"O-Okay." You gave him your consent. You felt him shift above you and kneel between your legs. Bucky grabbed the hem of your shirt and lifted it until your breasts were revealed. The coldness of his metal hand sent a chill down your spine. You closed your eyes in anticipation. Bucky leaned on you and put a kiss against your stomach.

"You're so soft and warm." He said. Bucky left a trail of kisses from your stomach to your sternum, the tip of his hair was tickling you and you couldn't help let a giggle escape your throat. "What's so funny?" He asked playfully.

"Nothing, you're just tickling me with your hair." You replied and Bucky grinned in amusement. He fondled one of your breasts with his flesh hand while he left kisses on your other one. Soon enough his mouth closed on your nipple and you brought your hand against your lips to muffle a moan. Bucky licked and sucked on your flesh bud, you blushed profusely and closed your eyes as you whimpered quietly. Your legs closed on his hips and so he figured you were liking very much what he was doing to you.

You brought your free hand to his head and caressed his hair while he was teasing your chest. Bucky brought his metal hand between your legs and started gently rubbing you through your clothes. Your hips jolted up.

"Are you alright?" He asked.

"Hmm." You nodded. "Yes, I-I'm... It's just a lot and I'm not used." You replied nervously.

"Does it feel bad?"

"N-No... It's new and I-I feel a bit _strange_ but it doesn't feel bad..." Bucky moved and laid back next to you. He catched your mouth with his for a new kiss and during that you felt his flesh hand this time, continue to nicely rub you. The winter soldier caressed the inside of your thighs and then he went further up to reach the hem of your booty shorts. Bucky pulled on your lower lip and nibbled on it to distract you, soon enough his hand went inside your bottoms. He let out a hum of pleasure as his fingers traced the lines of your pussy through your panties.

"You're so wet." He breathed against your lips as he smirked.

"Please don't comment." You replied with a deeper blush on your cheeks. Bucky came closer to you and finally he put his hand inside of your panties. You closed your eyes and held your breath. Oh God, that was it you thought. His middle finger rested on your clit as with his others he slowly separated your lips. He started circling it and you held onto his arm as you gulped.

"How does it feel, doll?" The winter soldier whispered next to you as he rubbed your clit.

"I-I..." You stuttered. "I-It's embarrassing to say, Bucky..." You rested your head on your pillow and stared at the ceiling. The super soldier approached you and put a kiss on your jaw.

"Spread your legs a little bit more." You did as he said. He put two fingers against your clit and started rubbing you a tad faster. This time a moan escaped your lips and damn, did Bucky wish he could see your face right now. He was growing more excited as he felt you get wetter and be more comfortable with him.

"B-Bucky!" You pleaded. "P-Please..." Your face was as red as a beet.

"I got you, doll." He reassured you. "I know what you need." He smiled. Bucky slided his fingers on your wet pussy and rubbed your entrance with his index finger before pushing it inside of you. You gasped but didn't stop him. "Kiss me." He asked you. You turned your head and put a hand on his nape before leaning and brushing your lips against his. Bucky pushed his finger in and out of you until he inserted a second one. You moaned against his lips as he scissored his fingers inside of you.

"I-It feels good." You said against his lips, you had guessed Bucky probably needed a confirmation at some point since you stayed silent besides your moans that reassured him you were fine.

"Please touch me too, doll." Bucky asked. You bit onto your lower lip out of nervosity. Oh God, okay, you could do this.

"O-Okay..." You said. Bucky removed his hands off you to take his clothes off. He was left in his underwear as he laid back next to you. He took your hand and kissed your palm before gently putting it on his bulge. Oh fuck, it warm, a bit wet but it seemed big, like really huge and it made you even more nervous.

"I'm sorry to ask but you know what to do, right?" He asked.

"Hmm." You confirmed. You had never seen one before but you knew how male anatomy worked and what you had to do to bring him pleasure as well.

"If you want you can kiss me while we touch each other if you're nervous." God, he was so sweet and caring with you, you truly loved that about him.

"I-I'd like that." You smiled shyly. Bucky kissed you deeply and brought back his hand to your pussy. While you were kissing you palpated his bulge just to reassure yourself before finally taking him into your hand. You put your hand inside his boxers and grabbed his dick. It was half hard and leaking a bit already. Bucky let out a soft sound against your lips and you got embarrassed when you realized what you were doing. You closed your eyes and gathered your courage to focus on him and finally work to bring him to the edge. You started moving your hand up and down, your thumb would occasionally rub the tip as well.

"Doll..." You felt him throb in your hands, it was very warm and you could feel the tiny veins appear on the side. Bucky fingered you with his index and middle fingers while circling your clit with his thumb. You moaned against his lips and the winter soldier pushed his tongue once again in your mouth. You french kissed for a little while until you both had to pull back for air. "Please do it faster." Bucky panted. "Hold it more firmly." You listened to his instructions and did as he said. Suddenly you wanted more, you _**needed**_ more.

"B-Bucky I-" You took a deep breath. "I-I'm ready if you want to..." You said.

"What?" He sounded surprised. "Really?"

"Hmm." You confirmed. "I- We're half way through it and I-I don't know how much more longer I'm gonna make you wait if we stop after this." You explained.

"I don't want to do it if you're forcing yourself for me." Bucky said to you.

"No, that's not my point." You rolled your eyes with a little giggle. "Listen, I really want you, okay?"

"Are you completely sure?" He asked again.

"Bucky, I swear if you ask me again." You passed your free hand on your face. "Yes, I'm sure. Put it in me." You said with determination. Bucky smiled and then you both took your hands off each other. You couldn't see him but you sensed he was taking off his last piece of clothing. You imitated him and took off your booty shorts.

"Wait. I want to take your panties off myself." Bucky smirked.

"Pervert." You joked. The winter soldier moved between your legs and put his hands on each side of your panties before sliding them off your legs. You were really nervous when you felt him approach you and you were pretty sure the thing you felt brush against the inside of your thigh was his dick.

"I have to warn you, I haven't done this in a really long time. I might be kind of rusty." He said to ease the mood.

"J-Just be gentle please... You're like really... big." You admitted as you blushed and you heard him chuckle above you.

"I promise you I'll do everything for you to feel good. Also please, feel free to be as loud as you want, we're alone on this floor." He teased.

"B-Bucky!" You gasped in embarrassment.

"God, I love you so much doll." Bucky chuckled lowly as he leaned on you and kissed you before leaning back to enter you. He took his dick in his hand and started rubbing the tip between your folds to coat it with your slick. You bit onto your lower lip and held your breath when you felt it poke at your entrance. Your brows furrowed when the tip entered you, it felt uncomfortable and not that good. Bucky pushed his hips a little more against yours and this time it was too much.

"Wait, wait." You warned him. Of course he stopped moving.

"Does it hurt?" He asked you in worry.

"Y-Yes..." You admitted. "Just please, don't move yet. I-I'll probably adjust to your size soon." You tried to reassure him but you were mostly reassuring yourself as you spoke.

"Relax, it's going to be fine." Bucky gently caressed your thighs as he spoke. "I'm really glad you're ready but I'm also happy for you you overcame your fears." It really moved you the way Bucky was never pressuring you or hurrying you, you appreciated greatly.

"Can- Can you please hug me, Bucky?" You asked him softly.

"Of course, babydoll." The winter soldier leaned on you and wrapped his arms around your body, unfortunately he accidentally pushed his hips back against yours and you let out a sound. Though, it wasn't a sound of pain... You moaned. "What was that?" Bucky smirked next to your head.

"I-I don't know. When you moved just now I... It felt okay... good actually." You said with surprise.

"Can I try to move?" He asked you before doing anything.

"Yes." You confirmed. Bucky put his fists against the mattress on each side of your body to support himself above you and then he slowly thrusted inside of you. "Ahhh...!" You moaned again.

"Fuck, you're so tight." He said.

"T-That's a bad thing?" You asked a bit panicked. You heard Bucky chuckle above you.

"Not at all babydoll, it means you're squeezing me and it feels great."

"Oh..." You bit onto your lower lip before speaking again. "I-I think I'm fine, you can keep moving."

"Alright." Bucky leaned back and held onto your waist before he pushed his hips against yours. He kept a nice pace as he thrusted into you, you closed your eyes and just focused on what you were feeling.

"B-Bucky..." You whispered in pleasure. The winter soldier leaned on you and you let out another loud moan. You covered your mouth with your hand as you blushed in shame. Bucky pounded into you and your arm naturally wrapped around his neck. He gripped your thigh with his metal hand as he buried his head in the crook of your neck, he kissed and sucked on your skin there earning more moans from you. "Please, don't stop." You pleaded.

"Don't plan to, doll." He breathed against your neck. Fuck, you heard him groan a few times against your skin and it was so hot. You ran your hands on his body starting from his biceps to his shoulders until you rested them on his torso, you could feel his muscles contract under his warm skin.

"Oh, fuck!" Your body suddenly jolted up. "B-Bucky, right there!" He focused on your soft spot and moved his hips in the right direction so his dick could rub against the right place. You closed your eyes, you could feel the knot in your abdomen was about to break out.

"I-I'm not gonna be able to hold much longer." He warned you as he panted. You locked your arms under his and clinged to him as he fucked you into the mattress. You could feel your orgasm was coming soon. Your moans were getting louder and they covered Bucky's own groans of pleasure. Soon your legs wrapped around his waist as well, the winter soldier could feel you tremble against him. He held you nicely before he catched your lips with his. Bucky kissed you deeply until your orgasm finally hit you, suddenly you saw all white as your eyes rolled back. Thankfully Bucky followed right after and he came inside of you with a groan. You wrapped your arms around his neck as you tried to catch your breath back.

"I-I... Wow..." You let out. Bucky pulled out of you and laid next to you, he was panting heavily. The winter soldier grabbed your hand and brought it to his lips.

"I love you, doll." He said before kissing your palm.

"I love you too, Bucky." You turned to stick your body to his, he wrapped his arms around you and held you tenderly. "T-That was good... great." You stuttered. You heard Bucky chuckle quietly.

"I enjoyed it too. I don't regret waiting for the right time." He said.

"T-Thank you for being patient with me." You put a kiss against his chest.

"You don't have to thank me for that, babydoll." Bucky said as he caressed your cheek with his hand. "I'm glad you trusted me enough to accept me as your first. Means a lot to me." He smiled. "You can sleep, my beautiful." He said with a low chuckle when he heard you yawn next to him.

"Goodnight Bucky, I love you." You said in a sleepy voice. Bucky leaned and put a kiss against your forehead before he closed his eyes as well.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so this is a work of FICTION, so don't bother me about the use of candoms, birth control or whatever. This is just a fantasy and if you have sex in life then yes, please, protect yourselves and be safe y'all.


	34. The Bestest

The following morning the winter soldier woke up first next to you. He watched you sleep peacefully with a tender smile on his face. Bucky felt the happiest at the dawn of this new day, he had a beautiful girlfriend and he had made love to her the night before. It took time but when he thought back of the act he didn't regret it at all. He couldn't stop thinking about the way you touched him, the things you made him feel but also the way he touched you, your skin, your smell, your sounds, he was obsessed with you.

After being lost in his thoughts for a little while Bucky got up and headed towards the bathroom to take a quick shower while you were asleep. He came out five minutes later and grabbed a pair of sweatpants from his closet. The winter soldier glanced towards the bed to make sure you were still sleeping and his eyes instantly widened. You slept with only your shirt on and the blanket had slided off you a bit and so your crotch was exposed to his view. A blush had crept on his cheeks as he stared at your bare pussy illuminated by the sun light, God, the sight alone made him want to dive in again. Bucky let out the breath he was holding before grabbing the hem of the blanket and putting it back on you to cover your body.

Bucky leaned on you and put a kiss on top of your head before grabbing the doorknob and going outside of his room. He walked towards the elevator and decided to head to the kitchen. It was still early, the winter soldier doubted anyone was awake at this hour. After the sweet night he spent with you he wanted to reward you and make you breakfast. Sure it wasn't a lot but knowing you Bucky knew you would be moved by the gesture.

The super soldier stepped in the kitchen and evidently he found no one there. He walked towards the fridge and the cupboards, he had no idea what you would feel like eating this morning so he decided to do your and his favorites: crepes. At least there was a high chance that would please you. Bucky grabbed all the ingredients he needed, eggs, flour, milk, etc... and started to work.

"Hey, Buck. You're up early." Steve greeted him as he walked into the kitchen.

"Hey, yeah." The winter soldier said without lifting his head from the counter he was working on.

"Any reason to that? Your headaches are back?" The captain asked.

"No, I woke up first and just wanted to make breakfast for doll."

"That so?" Steve grinned playfully. "Why are you shirtless?" Bucky glanced at Steve and smirked at his best friend. The super soldier's eyes widened. "Wait. Did you-" Bucky nodded before Steve could finish asking his question.

"We did and it was glorious." Bucky finally admitted excitedly.

"You dog!" Steve hit Bucky's arm slightly with a small laugh.

"You should've seen it Steve, she was perfect, the way she was clinging on me, her sounds, the way she-"

"Alright!" Steve interrupted his best friend and blushed in embarrassment. "I-I really don't need the details. I'm glad you both enjoyed it." The captain said.

"I'm the happiest man on this planet." Bucky grinned as he mixed the crepe batter. Steve smiled as he looked at Bucky, he was really glad for his best friend, he deserved this.

"So, you and [Y/N]... It's serious, huh?" The captain asked.

"Well, for my part-" Bucky smiled. "Yeah, it is. I don't know how but I feel different. She changed me. Before doll came into this tower, I feel like my body was here but not my conscience, you know?" Steve nodded. "After waking up from... Well, you know, finding love would've never crossed my mind. I really wanna try it and risk it for her... with her. I remember at the game in her first week here, when she asked us what was the most difficult thing about this job and Tony said we could die at any moment-"

"Yeah, I remember that." Steve said as he glanced down.

"Well, I don't wanna be afraid and not do anything in case we die. I wanna do things with her now so when I die I won't regret not spending time with my precious doll." Damn, that was deep. Steve almost felt like crying.

"I think that's a very valid reason, Buck." The captain smiled. "After all, Tony is married and he is happy as he continues to save the world. You can do both." Bucky's eyes widened as it suddenly hit him.

"Oh fuck, you think I should marry her?" The winter soldier asked his best friend.

"Woah there, tiger. Uh, I- That's not what I meant. I mean, you can if you think she's the one and that's what you want but uh, take your time. You've only known her for a few months now and even if you do love her, I think she'd freak out if you asked her right now." Steve raised one eyebrow as he looked at Bucky.

"Yeah, you're right. We just became official and had sex, I should take things gradually."

"Yeah, you do that." Steve put a hand on Bucky's shoulder.

The captain ended the conversation and let the winter soldier focus on his breakfast mission. Bucky was almost done, he took a tray and put the several fillings on it, he didn't forget your glass of milk as well. He was pleased with the result.

It's been one hour since he was in the kitchen. He left Steve and headed towards the elevator with his tray. You were probably still sleeping or so Bucky hoped so he could wake you up nicely himself. A smile of relief appeard on his face when he saw you were indeed still being rocked in Morpheus' arms. The winter soldier put down the tray on the nightstand on his side before he came next to you in the bed.

"Doll~" Bucky whispered to your ear before putting a kiss on your cheek. He wrapped his arm around your waist through the blanket and caressed your side.

"Hmm..." You hummed sleepily.

"Wake up, my beautiful babydoll." Bucky smiled against your skin as he left a trail of soft kisses on your face and neck.

"Bucky..?" You called out quietly. Your eyes remained closed though.

"Yes, it's me." He chuckled lowly.

"5 more minutes please." You whined and turned your body the other way, Bucky was facing your back now. You thought he would leave you alone but that was underestimating the winter soldier. He rolled his eyes in annoyance before approaching you and sticking his body to yours from behind. Bucky slided his arm under the blanket and wrapped it around your stomach, he knew you were naked under it so he kinda hoped it would draw a reaction from you but nothing, you were way too tired to protest against it.

"Please, I have a surprise for you." Bucky said as he rubbed your stomach. You slowly opened your eyes, letting them adjust to daylight. You yawned before turning around to face your boyfriend and then you stretched.

"Ow, fuck." You cursed.

"What's wrong?" Bucky worried.

"I-I... I feel sore." You admitted with a blush.

"Aw, does my babydoll need a massage?" He teased. You raised one eyebrow.

"You would do it?" You asked.

"If that's what you want, I will." Bucky smirked. "But first, sit down." You finally complied and sat on his bed, you covered yourself with the blanket when you realized your bottom was bare. "I made you breakfast and brought it here." Your eyes widened.

"Oh my God, really?" You asked excitedly. "Bucky, you're the best." You smiled happily as you wrapped your arms around him. Bucky let out a joyous laugh as you hugged him.

"I didn't know what you wanted to eat so I made you crepes." He said as he turned around and grabbed the tray.

"Okay, I know I just said you're the best but I was wrong, you're actually the bestest." You smiled warmly at him.

"What can I say, I need to take care of my doll after the sweet night she made me spend." You grabbed his hand after he put the tray on your lap.

"Let me eat first and then I'll thank you properly." You promised him with a playful grin.

  
  


\---

  
  


When you were done eating Bucky put the tray away on the nighstand and laid you back on his bed to kiss you.

"Hmf- Bucky!" You held his shoulders and gently pushed him away.

"What?" He asked you.

"W-We can make out later, I wanna take a shower first. Also my entire body hurts." You explained.

"You can take a shower here- Not with me!" He immediately said after your brows furrowed. "You take that shower and then I'll massage your sore muscles, how about that?" He suggested with a satisfied grin.

"Fine." You said after you sighed. "Only because I'm not sure I can walk to my bedroom." You blushed.

"Go, I'll clean up in here and bring you a towel." Bucky put a kiss on your cheek before getting up and picking up the tray to bring it back in the kitchen. When he left the room you took the blanket off you and stared at your thighs. Your eyes widened at the sight of your small bruises, you don't even remember getting hurt last night and so you wondered how they got there. Sure, you rememberd Bucky gripping your thighs and rubbing you but in your memory it felt good, it didn't hurt. You ignored it and got up from your boyfriend's bed. Your legs wobbled a bit when you stood up and you winced.

"Ugh." You let out painfully as you headed towards Bucky's bathroom. You closed the door behind you and hopped in the shower.

While you were washing your body the winter soldier came back into the room and cleaned around a bit. Clothes were scattered on the floor, the bed was messy and it felt stuffy in there. He opened the window and took a deep breath of fresh air.

"Better." He said out loud. Then he heard the water stop from the bathroom.

"Bucky, do you have that towel?" You asked him as you opened the door just a bit so you could pass your arm.

"Yeah, hold on." Bucky grabbed the towel that he had previously put on the chair in front of the desk and then walked towards the bathroom.

"Thank you." You smiled at him.

"So... Are you naked in there?" He joked.

"Stop fooling around, Bucky." You couldn't help chuckling. You wrapped the towel around your body and then got out of the bathroom. "Oh, it's chilly in here." You noticed.

"Yeah, I opened the window. Wait, I'll close it." He said as he walked towards it.

"No, it's fine, really." You said.

"Can't risk my babydoll catching a cold." He teased you after he closed the window. The winter soldier approached you and raised his arms to hold your head between his palms. "You're so adorable." He said with a warm smile as he stared into your eyes. Fresh out of the shower, your hair was wet and your face bare, you looked like a baby. You bit onto your lower lip before raising your head to kiss him.

"I love you, Bucky." You said to him after you naturally broke the kiss. You put your head against his chest as he wrapped his arms around your body. "I'm- you make me happy." You said to him. The winter soldier's heart beat faster in his chest, God knows he was happy too.

"I love you too, doll." He said as he gently caressed your bare back. "Come." Bucky asked you as he guided you towards the bed. "Let me take care of that massage."

"God, you're really the best boyfriend in the world." You let out and Bucky laughed quietly.

"Lay on your stomach." You did as he said while he went to grab an oil massage from the bathroom cabinet. Bucky came back and joined you in the bed. He straddled you and sat on your butt to rub your back properly. You didn't mind. "Can I?" He asked you as he put his hands on the hem of the towel wrapped around your form.

"Yes." You confirmed. You raised your torso so he could slip the towel until it only covered your bottom. Before he started Bucky leaned on you and left a trail of soft kisses from your back to your nape. "Don't take advantage of me." You giggled.

"When I'm done massaging you you're gonna beg me to continue to be touched." Bucky smirked as he raised one eyebrow. You blushed as you bit onto your lower lip, that sounded promising.

"Oh, fuck, that's cold!" You winced after Bucky dropped a few drops of oil on your back.

"Sorry, but I'm afraid it's not gonna get better." He warned you.

"What do you m- AH!" You let out a shriek after he put his metal hand on your back. Damn, you had forgotten.

"Bear it for just a few seconds, it's gonna warm up against your skin soon enough." He said as he leaned on you again to kiss your skin to be forgiven.

"Hmm." You felt a chill go down your spine and you got goosebumps all over. Bucky spread the oil on your back with his flesh hand while the metal one was adjusting to your body temperature. "Okay, it's fine now." You said.

"Alright." Bucky started applying pressure on your back, his hands ran on your skin and he eased all your knots, it felt really good. You had never gotten a massage before, I mean how could've you? You never let people see or touch your body, Bucky was the only one. The winter soldier pressed his thumbs on your spine from top to bottom, he massaged your lower back and you couldn't help letting out a moan.

"Hmm... Bucky, that feels so good." You said.

"And I'm just getting started, doll." He smirked, satisfied. "You have the softest skin, all I'm thinking about all day is touching you." You gulped as you blushed. Bucky couldn't help eyeing the top of your buttcrack as he rubbed your lower back, the towel had slipped a little and it was just tempting him from the beginning. "Doll, can I massage you... lower?" He couldn't stop himself, he had to ask.

"W-What?" You asked.

"I want to touch your butt." He finally let out.

"B-Bucky..!" You blushed harder. How could he just ask something like that out of the blue?

"Please, it's really tempting me. It looks so soft." He pleaded.

"I-I don't know, Bucky... Y-You've never seen me... in daylight I mean..." Oh fuck, he rememberd when he woke up.

"What... if I did?" He let out. _What?_ "This morning when I woke up... I took a shower while you were still sleeping and when I got out the blanket had slipped off you-" Oh, God. You knew what he was going to say. "I-I didn't see your top but... I saw your-"

"I got it." You interrupted him. You closed your eyes and sighed deeply. Honestly you were the one to blame, Bucky did nothing wrong. You shouldn't have slept naked. "A-And..?" You asked. You didn't know what you wanted to hear, you just hoped he wasn't disgusted by your body.

"And?" Bucky raised an eyebrow. "All I wanted was to dive right back in doll. Had to stop myself because you look cute when you're asleep." You brought your hands to your face, you were so ashamed but also really happy inside that he didn't find you gross, ugly or unattractive.

"O-Okay..." You let out after you sighed. After all you had nothing to lose and everything to gain, you trusted Bucky and you were about to get another nice massage so you gave him your consent.

"Doll, you're perfect." The winter soldier reminded you again. He backed up a little since he was sitting on your bottom, he put his hands on the hem of the towel and pulled it down. That was it now, you felt a chill brush against your naked butt and so you closed your eyes in anticipation. Bucky smiled before leaning forward and putting a kiss on your lower back, just above your butt. You relaxed a little, you kept repeating to yourself that everything was okay and Bucky loved you.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the way, I'm starting to run out of ideas so feel free to request some if you do! Like exemples of dates, missions or stuff you wanna see reader do with Bucky or if you want some mcu characters to appear in this story.  
> No need to drop ideas for the ending I already know how it's gonna finish.  
> I'm also interested in knowing if you guys would like to read more angst? Not gonna lie I love writing it but y'all got upset during the chapters with Loki so I'm hesitating (and no, he will not come back).  
> Thanks!


	35. Last Fear

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ayy, y'all getting a few more smut filled chapters before we enter the new angst arc I'm currently writing ;)

"Sorry, it's gonna feel cold again." The winter soldier warned you before dropping more oil on your butt. At least his metal palm wasn't freezing anymore. Bucky put his hands on each of your buttcheeks and started massaging you. That felt so intimate you closed your eyes as you blushed, you were pretty sure that counted as foreplay.

"Hmmm..." You couldn't help humming in pleasure and all your sounds went straight to Bucky's crotch, he was getting very excited. God, you loved everything he was doing to you. "Bucky, I love your hands." You said softly.

"And I love your entire body, babydoll." He smirked. "Do you... wanna turn around so I can continue taking care of you?" You bit onto your lower lip.

"I-I..." You hesitated. You really wanted to overcome this last fear but you couldn't help being scared.

"You have nothing to be afraid of." He reassured you. Could Bucky read your mind? Because that's really what you needed to hear. "All I want is to please you, you already know I love you and I don't care what you look like. Maybe you're hiding scars, stretch marks, I don't know but I want you to know I don't care." Bucky got off your body and came next to you so he could look at your face. "Like, have you seen me?" He smiled at you. "A part of me isn't even human. I'm the last person who's allowed to say anything negative about your body."

"Bucky, you're perfect to me." You said to him with a sad expression. He took your hand and kissed it.

"I know, doll, that's why I want you to believe I feel the exact same way about you. I love you and whatever you're hiding isn't gonna change that fact." Bucky smiled at you. "I was happy when you let me touch you yesterday, you don't have to be ashamed of anything about you around me." You brought your hand to his cheek as tears appeard in the corner of your eyes. The winter soldier looked at you reassuringly as he smiled warmly at you and then he leaned to kiss your lips. You took a deep breath after Bucky broke the kiss.

"Okay." You finally let out. You didn't warn your boyfriend but you knew that if something negative was said in the next minutes you would pack your bags and run away from this place forever. You trusted Bucky very strongly to let him look and touch you in daylight. The winter soldier laid next to you on the bed.

"You can turn around anytime you want." He said to you in a gentle tone.

"Hm." You put your hands against your face as you were still laying on your stomach and breathed deeply. That was it now. You tried to reassure yourself, Bucky had already seen your crotch as he stated earlier and he didn't run away from you, he hadn't seen your stomach and chest but he had touched them. With those reassuring thoughts you finally turned on your side to face him.

"Doll..." Bucky breathed as his eyes wandered on your body. His pupils were dilated when he brought his stare back to your face. "You have nothing to be ashamed of, you're beautiful."

"B-Bucky..." You were crying. Not because of his words or him but because you had done it, you overcame your last fear. Bucky approached you and took you in his arms.

"I'm so proud of you." He smiled as he put a kiss on top of your head. You loved how reassuring, how patient, how kind, how comforting and how caring he was with you. You wrapped your arms around him as well.

"I-I'm afraid I killed the mood." You joked to ease the mood.

"That can be fixed, doll." Bucky laid you on your back and buried his head in the crook of your neck. You wiped your tears while he was leaving love bites on your skin. He ran his flesh hand on your side and you let out a small giggle. "Tickles again?" He asked as he chuckled against your skin.

"Hmm." You confirmed.

"How about we continue from where we left off?" He asked. "I believe I wasn't done with my massage."

"Sounds good." You smiled. Bucky leaned back and searched for the oil bottle on the bed and when he glanced at your thighs his eyes widened.

"What's that??" He asked in worry.

"W-What?" You asked in fear he found something to say about your body.

"Your bruises..." Bucky said as he carefully held one of your legs. "Did I do that when I was sitting on you?" You let out a sigh of relief.

"No, no. I already had them this morning. I-I think it was during... you know." You said as you blushed.

"I'm so sorry, doll, I didn't realize."

"It's fine, Bucky, I didn't either. It didn't even hurt, I was surprised too when I saw the bruises." Bucky kneeled between your legs as you explained and then it hit you, you were naked and you were not in the darkness, he could see _everything_. You closed your thighs and you accidently bumped his head with your knee.

"Ow."

"I-I'm sorry!" You said quickly. Bucky raised his head to look at you with a questioning stare. "Y-You're right in front of my..." You turned your head as you blushed more. The winter soldier smirked before he approached your thigh and started leaving kisses on your bruises. You held your breath as you watched him. God, what was he so hot for? Your heart missed a beat, the way he was kissing you was so gentle it warmed you inside your chest.

"My beautiful doll... I want to kiss you all over." You felt something in your lower stomach and it didn't feel bad. Bucky put his hands on your knees. "Trust me."

"You know I do..." You said. "You can't use that on me everytime to get your way, Bucky." He looked at you with that sad puppy expression you couldn't say no to. "Please, not that look either." You bit onto your lower lip.

"Does it work?" He smirked.

"Yes, ugh. I can't stand you." You gave up. You breathed deeply before slowly spreading your legs. Bucky came closer and started kissing the inside of your thighs. You got goosebumps all over again, he was just so talented with his mouth but not only. As he kissed your legs he also caressed you with his hands and soon enough his fingers met your slit and you gasped.

"You're fine, babydoll, relax." He reassured you. "You're so beautiful." He commentated as he spread your pussy lips.

"P-Please don't stare, oh my God." You blushed in embarrassment.

"I want to you kiss you." Your brows furrowed in confusion.

"Why are you asking me? You've kissed me before." You said. Bucky chuckled lowly.

"It's not your mouth that I want to kiss." He let out and your eyes widened with realization.

"W-What..?"

"I promise you it's gonna feel good." You were so lost. "Please, doll, accept."

"Better make it a hundred now." You rolled your eyes.

"Have you regretted any of the times where I made you accept something?" He raised one eyebrow as he raised his head to look at your face. Fuck, he was right.

"A-Are you sure you want to do this?" You asked him.

"I wouldn't be trying to convince you to let me do it if I didn't want to."

"Fine, smartass." You said. Bucky chuckled, this was going to be fun. He came so close to you you could feel his breath tickle against your wet lips. Bucky started by continuing his kisses on the inside of one of your thighs before gradually coming closer to your crotch. Then you felt him leave soft kisses on your lips. You closed your eyes and let him do whatever he wanted, you didn't know what to expect so you waited in anticipation.

"Don't move your hips." He warned you before he separated your lips with his fingers. Then Bucky gave your slit a long lick and you couldn't help your body jolting up. Oh God, what the fuck was that?

"S-Sorry." You blurted out. Bucky smirked as he gave your pussy another long lick, you brought your hand against your mouth and muffled a moan. He stopped teasing you and so he focused on bringing you to your first oral orgasm. The winter soldier gave your clit a few cat-like licks before he closed his mouth on it and started sucking on it. "B-Bucky!" You brought your free hand to his head and pulled on his hair, you were about to apologize about that too but then you heard him groan against your pussy and the vibration made the apology die out on your tongue as you moaned again. You removed your hand from his hair but he grabbed it and put it back on his head.

"No." He ordered and that was the hottest thing you've ever heard so you held back onto his hair as he ate you out. Your thighs shaked and it took you everything to not close them and crush his skull, whatever he was doing to you felt amazing. You muffled another moan so Bucky stopped what he was doing and you whined in frustration. "Don't cover your mouth, let me hear you or this stops." You bit onto your lower lip. Holy shit, where did this Bucky come from? "Are we clear?" He asked as he raised his head to look at you.

"Y-Yes, sir." You replied and then you saw him smirk before he gave your pussy another lick. You gripped your pillow in your hand as another sweet sound escaped your mouth. The winter soldier put his metal arm on your lower stomach to keep you from moving as he ate you out. Bucky gave your clit another harsh suck and you let out a moan so loud you got worried someone other than your boyfriend might've heard you in this tower. Suddenly while he was pleasuring you with his mouth he decided to push a finger inside of you and soon enough he put a second one. You were so close to your orgasm you had no reason to protest, the combination of his mouth and fingers drove you crazy. "Please, please don't stop!" You begged him.

"Are you close, babydoll?" Bucky asked you as he curved his fingers inside you and rubbed them against your sweet spot.

"Yes!" You gripped his hair tighter and he let out another groan. Bucky licked and sucked on your clit while pushing his fingers deeper inside of you and then you were gone. Your entire body shaked as your orgasm washed over you. Bucky took his fingers out of you and put your thighs down as you panted.

"So?" He asked with a satisfied grin as he laid back next to you. You passed your hand on your face before turning your head to look at him.

"The things you do with your mouth and fingers... I-I never felt greater pleasure." You said. Bucky let out a laugh before wrapping his arm around your waist and then put a kiss on your cheek. "Bucky, I love you so much." You said to him as you put a hand on his cheek.

"Do you love me enough to... let me put it in you?" He asked.

"What?"

"Not gonna lie but seeing you like _that_ and hearing you, it turned me on." Oh fuck, you couldn't just let him be _unsatisfied_ after what he just did for you. It was your role to take care of him as well after all. You smiled at him.

"Yes." You gave him consent. "Yes, I love you enough." Bucky grinned happily and then he put a quick kiss on your mouth. He got up from the bed and took off his sweatpants, you saw his dick stand proudly against his abdomen. Oh, God, it was fully hard and the size intimidated you. Bucky walked in front of the bed and then he pulled you towards the edge by your legs. "Jesus Christ, is it even gonna fit?" You asked.

"Don't worry, doll. Why do you think I fingered you? I was stretching you." You blushed. God, he really had no shame speaking crude like that.

"J-Just... Please start slowly." You said.

"I got you, baby." Bucky smirked as he looked at you. He guided his tip towards your entrance and slowly pushed inside. Your brows furrowed as you closed your eyes but soon enough you relaxed, you were afraid you'd feel the same pain as yesterday but there was nothing, you just felt _full_. "It's in." He said.

"I'm fine, I'm okay. You can move." You reassured him. One push of his hips and you let out a long moan already. You were still sensitive from your previous orgasm and this time you weren't anxious like your first time so your pleasure came much quicker. Bucky took your legs and laid them against his torso as he bent over and thrusted inside of you. "Bucky..." You moaned with your eyes closed.

"Tell me how you feel." He asked you.

"Amazing, so, so good." You replied.

"I'm the only one who can make you feel like this?" He asked as he wrapped his arms around your thighs and he fucked you harder.

"Yes, only you, Bucky- Fuck! Please right there!" You opened your arms for him. "Please, come." Bucky smiled before laying you further back into the bed so he could climb back on it. You moved back and rested your head on your pillow. Bucky pushed back inside you and leaned forward, you wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him deeply. The winter soldier loved how clingy you could get, he loved feeling like you needed him, it warmed his heart.

"You're so pretty when you're turned on, doll." Bucky said as he looked at your face. You started running your hands on his torso but he grabbed them with his and held them above your head. "I want you to look at me, look into my eyes when you come." You bit onto your lower lip as you blushed harder. Bucky thrusted faster and deeper inside of you, earning new loud moans from you.

"Bucky, I-I'm gonna-" You warned him. You could feel it, the knot in your lower stomach was about to break. You wrapped your legs around his hips to hurry him to go harder.

"Me too, please look at me." Bucky panted. You opened your eyes and stared into his. The winter soldier moved his hips quicker against yours, he noticed that change in your expression, when you went from pleasure to pure orgasm. He would never forget it. You squeezed each other's hands as you came at the same time. Bucky pulled out of you and dropped on the bed next to you. Your chests were rising up and down as you panted, God, that was good.

"So... You like your hair being pulled huh?" You asked with a playful grin as you turned to lay on your stomach and look at your boyfriend's face. Bucky let out a little chuckle while his eyes were closed and he tried to catch his breath again.

"Alright, make fun of me as much as you want." He said with resignation.

"You know I'd never make fun of you. I just find it interesting." You raised one eyebrow.

"It's called a kink and everyone has one. I just need to find yours soon." He said.

"What's a kink?" You asked.

"It's something that turns you, like a sexual fantasy. It can be anything." Bucky explained to you.

"And everyone has one?" You asked.

"Well, people that have sex at least I suppose."

"So, for exemple if I like hugging you during the- you know... That'd be a kink?"

"Does the idea alone turn you on? When you hug- let's say, Steve, does it make you excited?"

"No..." You replied.

"Then I don't think it's a kink."

"So you're saying if someone else pulled your hair it'd turn you on?" You asked as your brows furrowed.

"I guess." He shrugged.

"Buck!" You called him out a bit upset. "Fine, no one is allowed to touch your hair as long as I'm your girlfriend." You pouted. Bucky laughed next to you.

"I think I found another kink. That scrunched nose of yours." He joked before approaching you and kissing it. "You'll understand when we find your kink but for now you just need to understand I don't want anybody pulling my hair except you." You bit onto your lower lip as you relaxed. Bucky catched your mouth with his and kissed you passionately.

"Good." You replied. "What time is it? I feel like we stayed in bed all morning."

"Uhh..." Bucky turned towards the nightstand. "Almost noon."

"Oh my God, we did stay in bed all morning. What are the others going to say?" You worried.

"Why do you care?" Bucky asked.

"I-I don't want them to know we've been doing the... nasty for so long." You let out a bit embarrassed.

"You're so adorable." Bucky laughed again. "I love you so much."

"Me too, Bucky." You replied in a soft tone.

"Are you hungry?" He asked.

"Starving." You replied.

"Alright, let's cleanup and get you something to eat."

 


	36. "Terrific"

"Hello." You greeted everyone as you entered the kitchen with the winter soldier by your side.

"Hey." Tony replied. You picked up your plates and cutlery and went to sit around the table with the Avengers.

"Where have you two been? We haven't seen you since yesterday night." Nat asked.

"N-Nowhere. We did nothing." You replied nervously while Bucky let out a low chuckle next to you, you elbowed him to shut up.

"Really?" Nat raised one eyebrow. Of course no one believed you. Steve crossed eyes with Bucky and the winter soldier nodded as he smirked. Steve raised his eyes to the sky, he understood. God, the poor captain would never be able to see you as his innocent younger sister anymore.

"S-So..." You started in hopes to change the subject. "Do you guys have any news about Thor?"

"Nope." Bruce replied. "We can't really communicate between Earth and Asgard." The doctor explained to you. "But he should be back soon."

"Great." You replied. You started digging into your food in an awkward silence. You felt so ashamed as if they all could read on your face that you weren't a virgin anymore. You were starting to become paranoid.

"[Y/N], Bucky, do you guys have anything planned today?" Nat asked.

"No. Nothing. Why would we?" You replied way too quickly for it to seem normal.

"Are you okay?" Tony asked you.

"Yes, I'm terrific." You replied and then lowered your head as you continued to eat.

"Terrific?" Tony mouthed to Bruce with a confused expression. Bucky put his hand on your thigh under the table to signal you to calm down and you gasped so loudly Bruce dropped his glasses.

"I-I'm sorry!" You blurted out. Nat looked at your boyfriend for an explanation.

"She had... a bad dream. Didn't sleep all night." He lied.

"Maybe you should go back to bed then." Tony suggested.

"I-I'm fine, it's okay." You said.

"Anyway, as I was saying-" Nat reported the attention back to her. "I wanted to crash the mall this afternoon and I wondered if you and Bucky wanted to join me and Steve. Though I'm not sure it's a good idea now."

"W-We'll come!" You said. "I-I mean, if you want to." You turned to Bucky.

"Everywhere you go I go, doll." He smiled at you.

"Okay, nice." The redhaired woman replied.

"2pm in the parking lot?" Steve suggested.

"Perfect." Bucky replied.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Is there a specific reason you wanted to come here?" You asked Nat. You and your teammates were currently on the first floor of the mall, it was really crowded and honestly had it not been for Bucky holding your hand at the moment you probably would've waited in the car. Speaking about the winter soldier, _he came_ for a specific reason.

"Wanted to do some shopping." She replied as she looked around.

"Hey, doll, would you be a sweetheart and get me a water bottle from that store over there?" He asked you. Your brows furrowed in confusion but then you shrugged it off.

"Uh, sure. Of course." You smiled at your boyfriend.

"Steve, can you go with her please?" The captain nodded and then you both walked towards the store.

"What do you have in mind?" Nat asked Bucky as she knew something was going on.

"Why would I have something in mind?" He replied.

"I'm pretty sure that's the first time you ask her to do something for you. If [Y/N] suddenly had a craving for original italian sorbet you would steal a jet from SHIELD and go get it for her from Rome." Bucky let out a low chuckle, he would indeed.

"Alright, maybe I do have something in mind." Bucky admitted. "I need you to help me with something."

"I'm used to this now, aren't I?" Nat joked. "What do you want?" She asked more seriously.

"Help her buy a swimsuit." He let out. Nat dropped on a bench behind them.

"This is gonna be even harder than the dress."

"No, don't worry. It should be fine."

"Bucky, you seem to forget she has real low self-esteem." The winter soldier raised his hand to stop her.

"What if I tell you... It's getting better." He chose his words carefully. Nat's brows furrowed.

"Okay, you're either saying too much or not enough." He sat next to her on the bench. "Tell me everything or I won't help you." Bucky let out a deep sigh.

"Well let's just say that the nightmare isn't what kept her up all night." He smirked. Nat's eyes widened.

"This can't be real." She let out. Bucky raised one eyebrow as he glanced at her.

"Oh crap, they're coming back. Are you helping me or not?" He asked quickly.

"Yeah, yeah. Don't worry about it." She said after they both got up.

"Thanks, I owe you one."

"You owe me like five, Bucky."

"Here." You handed your boyfriend his water bottle.

"Thank you, doll." Bucky smiled at you before putting a chaste kiss on your lips.

"[Y/N], come with me to that store. It's getting hotter and I need a new swimsuit." She said to you in a cheery tone. You looked at Bucky and he gestured you to go with Nat.

"Me and Steve will go over there." The winter soldier said before you split up.

  
  


You and Nat had been checking the different pieces of clothing for twenty minutes, the store was huge and possessed many types of bathing suits.

"Don't you wanna get one for yourself?" Nat said after you kept showing her swimsuits that you thought would look good on **her**. You let out a sigh.

"It's Bucky who asked you, right?" You asked.

"How did you know?" She didn't even try to deny it.

"Well-" You let out a little giggle. "He keeps asking me to shower or take a bath with him. He tried to reassure me by saying we didn't have to be naked and suggested me to wear a swimsuit but I told him I didn't have one." You took a few seconds to think. "I wonder if that's a kink too..." You muttered.

"What did you say?" Nat asked.

"N-Nothing. Nothing, I was thinking out loud." You blushed.

"Well, what's keeping you from taking a shower with him?"

"I-I don't know, it's really intimate."

"More intimate than having sex with him?" Your jaw dropped.

"He told you?!"

"C'mon, it's me. Don't be mad at him for it." You rolled your eyes. "And you know I wouldn't have let him hide it from me."

"Right, fine." You gave up.

"I'm glad for you though, Bucky seems really happy too." Nat smiled.

"Thanks." You relaxed and smiled back at her. "I thought back of what you said to me at the zoo and you were right. I don't regret sleeping with Bucky at all."

"Was it good?" She asked and her lips curved into a smirk. You let out a long breath.

"It was... more than that." You admitted and Nat laughed next to you.

"Great. Now, get yourself a nice swimsuit." She grabbed you by the shoulders from behind and guided you through the aisles.

  
  


You got out of the store when you were done and yes, you had bought a swimsuit. You and Nat held onto each other's arms as you searched for your boys, you saw them next to an elevator but they weren't alone, they were talking with another man. By the looks on their faces you guessed it was one of their good friends perhaps. They were smiling and laughing and then they catched sight of you and Nat.

"Hey, Sam. Long time no see." The redhaired woman approached him and they hugged.

"How have you been?" He smiled at her.

"Sam, let me introduce you to [Y/N]-" Bucky said as he put his arm around your shoulders. "My girlfriend." You smiled at your boyfriend as a little blush had crept on your cheeks. It was nice to be introduced like that.

"Is that so?" He raised an eyebrow at Bucky. "Well, pleased to meet you [Y/N]. I'm Sam Wilson." He gave you his hand and you shaked it. "How much more did I miss?" He joked.

"Well, you would know if you came more often at the tower." Steve said with a smile.

"You know how it is with this job." Sam said to the captain who nodded. "But I'll remember to drop by soon." He promised.

"So, what were you doing around here?" Nat asked the Falcon.

"I was going to the drugstore to get some gel, I think I pulled a muscle during one of my trainings. My shoulder hurts like hell." He explained. Your teammates crossed eyes with you and you nodded.

"Why don't you have a seat?" Steve suggested to Sam.

"I'd love to hang out with y'all but I'm kinda in a hurry, no offense."

"Just sit down." Nat guided him to a bench.

"By the way did I mention to you that my doll right here-" Bucky took your hand. "Is an Avengers as well?"

"Really? Looks like I did miss a lot." Sam said as he looked at you. "Was that what the invitation Tony sent me a few weeks back was about?"

"Yeah, it was her birthday." Steve said.

"And Tony also took that opportunity to introduce her to everyone else as the new member." Nat continued.

"Alright, well welcome to the team but I don't understand why we're talking about this." Sam said as his brows furrowed with confusion.

"Which shoulder is it?" You asked.

"The right one." He replied.

"May I?" You asked as you approached your hand to his shoulder. Sam crossed eyes with Steve.

"Trust her." The captain replied.

"Well, I have no idea what you're about to do to me lady, but go ahead."

"I-I'm sorry I have to touch your skin." You warned before passing your hand through the sleeve hem to reach his shoulder. You closed your eyes and let your powers manifest.

"She has healing powers." Your teammates finally explained to Sam. His eyes widened. He turned his head and looked at you while you were healing him. Soon enough you opened your eyes and brought your hand back to yourself.

"So?" Steve asked Sam.

"I don't understand." He started as he moved his arm in circular motions. "I don't feel anything anymore. That's just miraculous." He let out. You smiled at him shyly.

"I'm dating a Goddess." Bucky praised you before kissing your forehead, you leaned against his touch and blushed.

"I don't know how to thank you. Let me buy you a drink." Sam said to you after he got up.

"I thought you were in a hurry." Nat teased.

"Yeah because I had an appointment to the physiotherapist, appointment I'm gonna cancel now." He said as he pulled out his phone.

"It's fine, I'm glad to help. It's my job." You said humbly.

"Well, why won't we all stop by a café?" Steve suggested.

"That's an excellent idea." Bucky grinned. "And Sam is paying." He teased and then the two men started laughing as you all walked in the mall searching for a coffee place.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Well, that was fun." Steve commentated.

"Yeah, I had a good time." You added. The gang was heading towards the living space after you walked out of the elevator where you came from. After spending a bit of time with Sam Wilson you departed and decided to go back home to the tower.

"You guys go on, I need to speak to my doll." Bucky said to Nat and Steve. They nodded and left you in the hallway.

"What's wrong?" You asked your boyfriend.

"I just wanted to give you... This." Bucky smiled before offering you a red rose wrapped in plastic paper. Your eyes shined brightly.

"Bucky-" You said happily as you took it in your hand. "Wh- When did you even get this?" You asked him as you grinned.

"Don't bother with the details." He shrugged.

"I don't even know how you hid it." You placed the rose in your shopping bag where the swimsuit you bought was and then dropped it on the floor to wrap your arms around Bucky's neck. "I love you so much." You said to the winter soldier before pulling him down for a passionate kiss. Bucky took you in his arms and lifted you off the ground a little before putting you back down. "I need to step up my game, I haven't offered you anything yet." You said after you broke the kiss.

"You have no idea how much you have given me already." Bucky smiled against your lips. You ran your hand through his soft hair and left more kisses on his face. He hummed pleasantly as you kissed him. "Hmm... the way you touch me, doll-" He locked eyes with you. "We better join the others before I take you against this wall." He whispered, you bit onto your lower lip and blushed as you stared into his eyes. You picked up your bag and took his arm before stepping inside the living space.

"Hey." Bruce greeted you both. You waved at him as you smiled in a friendly way.

"Ah, good, you both are here as well. Sit down, I have news." Tony said. Bucky sat on the couch and when you wanted to sit next to him he put his hands on your waist and made you sit on his lap. You rolled your eyes as you resigned yourself with a little smile, you didn't want to argue with him.

"What's going on?" Steve asked.

"It's less important so I'll start with that, Fury left me a message about... Loki." You flinched and Bucky noticed it. God, you really didn't need to think back about the times he was here. Not that you had any bad feelings towards the God of mischief but the winter soldier suffered a lot while he was here so you would rather spare those painful memories to him. You chose Bucky and you were the happiest with him, you didn't regret your choice. "He reported to me about the mission with you, Natasha." Tony continued.

"Did he decide if he's gonna make Loki an Avengers?" Nat asked.

"Yes and..." Tony paused. "Fury is positive." You couldn't help your lips from curving into a smile. You had made this. You're the one who convinced everyone to give him a chance and your plan worked, you had successfully helped and offered Loki his redemption. "But, as you all know, Loki is now king of Asgard and I doubt we're gonna see him around here soon so-"

"We're back to square one." Bruce said.

"Exactly." Tony concluded. You and Bucky stayed silent during the whole conversation, the situation was already as awkward as it could be.

"Is there anything else?" Steve asked.

"Yes, a new mission." Tony announced. "[Y/N] and Bucky, you're in." Your eyes widened.

"What?" You let out. You had no problem about the mission and doing it with Bucky but you wondered if it wasn't just too dangerous for **him**. You weren't strong like Natasha and you were afraid Bucky would be distracted by trying to protect you and get himself killed. You wouldn't allow it.

"We need you to go in an undercover mission next week. I'll explain the details to you."

 


	37. Cabin in the Woods

For seven days you and Bucky have been through hell.

Since you had to prepare for the mission the others didn't let you both interact and distract yourselves. Bucky had to go back to his intense training sessions since he's been slacking off lately and Tony took that opportunity to train you and get used to your iron suit since you had never used it before.

The days where you would hang out with Bucky, Nat and Steve had long been gone. The Avengers in the tower wouldn't even let you sleep on the same floor. You had moved in with Nat in her bedroom so she could look after you and make sure you wouldn't get out of bed to join the winter soldier during the night.

You and your boyfriend were only allowed to sit next to each other in the kitchen. You had never missed someone that much before. You couldn't wait to be done with that mission so you could finally take Bucky in your arms again and hang out with him.

"Hey, I don't think we've been introduced. I'm Bucky." He gave you his hand.

"Hi, nice to meet you, I'm [Y/N]." You both joked after you shaked hands. You were currently having dinner with everybody before leaving for the mission. You would travel during the night.

"Ha ha, very funny." Tony said.

"You both brought this onto yourselves." Nat added. "We just can't leave you alone, you can't focus when you're together." You held Bucky's hand under the table, you had really missed this.

"Why are you trusting us for this mission then?" Bucky rolled his eyes.

"Well thanks to our help, you're now ready." She smiled in a satisfied way. "While you were busy living your love life in the tower I think you forgot the harsh reality of our job." You stopped smiling and lowered your head. She was right except for one thing, you had not forgotten, you were simply trying to not think about it. You knew you could lose each other at any moment and so you tried to live your life in the most normal way possible so you wouldn't have to stress yourself out and overthink about your situation. You were terrified of losing Bucky.

"It's going to be fine, [Y/N]." Steve tried to reassure you and put a hand on your shoulder as he noticed your change in mood.

"Great, thanks Nat." Bucky said sarcastically as he wrapped his arm around your shoulders and brought you against him.

"It's fine." You held back your tears, you didn't want to break down in front of everybody. "I didn't forget, I just didn't want to think about it." You said. "Bucky is the best thing that's happened to me. In my entire life." You said with determination. "It's true that lately we've been having a lot of fun but it's either that or I lock myself in my room terrified of losing him at any moment."

"Doll..." Bucky squeezed your hand in his as he smiled tenderly.

"I need to finish packing my bags." You said as you got up and then left the kitchen.

  
  


You were folding your clothes in your room when suddenly someone knocked at your door.

"Hey." You smiled slightly after opening the door. The winter soldier was leaning against the frame.

"How are you?" He asked and then he stepped inside after you moved out of the way to let him pass.

"I'm fine, really." You said as you stared into his eyes, he didn't look convinced.

"Just the truth?" He asked.

"Only the truth." You replied. Bucky approached you and hugged you tightly against him.

"God, I missed you doll." He said as he buried his head in the crook of your neck and inhaled your scent.

"Me too, Bucky, so so much." You said as you wrapped your arms around him.

"Are you almost done? We have to go soon." He asked you after you both took a step back from each other.

"Hmm, yeah." You confirmed. You zipped up your bag and when you were about to take it Bucky gestured you to let him do it. "Thanks." You smiled at him. "Your stuff's already in the car?" You asked.

"Yeah, we're good to go." He replied. You stepped out of your room and headed towards the elevator. Before going to the parking lot you entered the living space to warn the others.

"You're leaving?" Steve asked.

"Yeah." Bucky replied. The Avengers members got up and said bye to you and Bucky.

"Listen... I'm sorry about earlier." Nat said to you. You smiled at her and hugged her.

"It's fine, I'm not mad at you." You reassured you her.

"Be careful." She said to you.

"See you soon, Buck." Steve hugged his best friend.

"You won't get rid of me that easily." Bucky joked.

"You guys look after each other." Bruce said to you and Bucky.

"Don't forget the suit." Tony reminded you one last time.

"Yes, dad." You joked. Tony smiled before hugging you as well.

"Alright, we gotta go." Bucky took your hand and guided you back to the elevator to join the parking lot.

"If they disappear for months they're so coming back with a kid." Nat joked after you left the living space.

"Nope, no way I'm hearing this." Tony covered his ears with his hands while Steve looked away terribly embarrassed.

  
  


Bucky opened the trunk and put your bag inside while you went to take your seat at the front. He climbed in the driver seat and turned to you before starting the car. The winter soldier said nothing for a little while, he just stared at you with a smile on his face.

"What?" You asked.

"I almost forgot how beautiful you are." You blushed. Bucky took your hand and brought it to his lips. "I love you, doll." You smiled warmly at your boyfriend before leaning and kissing him deeply.

"I love you so much too." You said after you broke the kiss. Bucky took a deep breath before starting the car and driving out of the parking lot.

"We have a long way to go, I wanna make it to the forest before it's too dark." He said as he kept his eyes on the road. "There's a cabin in the woods that Tony owns, we'll stay there for the night."

"Okay." You replied.

"You can sleep if you want." Bucky glanced in your direction.

"No, I'm fine. And I don't want to leave you alone, you're gonna get bored." You said as you straightened yourself on your seat.

"Are you nervous?" He asked you. You let out a low sigh.

"Yes." You replied truthfully. "You know, when I had my first mission with you... I was mad at you back then but I was reassured Steve was with us. I thought that if something would happen to one of you you would help each other until you would get back to me." You lowered your head before continuing. "Now I'm afraid that if something happens I-I don't know how I'll be able to help you. I can heal you but that's all I can do."

"It's a lot." Bucky said.

"It will be useless if someone takes you away, point a gun at your head or-" You took a deep breath as you felt the tears coming back. The winter soldier took your hand and squeezed it.

"We will be alright, doll. You have nothing to worry about." Bucky reassured you. "This mission isn't too dangerous that's why they trusted the both of us on it." He let out a small chuckle before continuing. "Actually I'm pretty sure they did it on purpose, sending us away, you and me."

"What do you mean?" You asked.

"They're not stupid, they know we're a couple and-" He grinned. "We are pretty close and clingy to each other." You smiled. "This is a one person mission, I think Tony suggested our names to Fury so he could stop seeing you feed me during breakfast for a little while." You held Bucky's hand between yours and brought it to your chest.

"Thank you." You said softly.

"Are you sure you don't want to sleep?" The winter soldier asked you with a smile after you yawned. "I promise you I'll wake you up if anything happens."

"But what about you?" You asked. "Time will seem longer if I don't... keep you entertained." You said with a little giggle.

"Don't worry about me." He smiled.

"How can I not?" You replied as you kissed his hand. "Fine." You resigned yourself. "But wake me up in 30 minutes, if I sleep for too long anyway I'll stay awake all night and be tired tomorrow."

"Alright." He replied.

"Can I keep holding your hand?" You asked softly. Bucky glanced in your direction and smiled.

"You gotta stop doing that."

"Doing what?" You asked playfully.

"Acting adorable. I'm this close to stop the car and cuddle with you in the backseat." You bit onto your lower lip.

"I-I really want to." You let out. His eyes widened.

"Oh no, don't say that." He was hesitating now. "Please wait until we're at the cabin." Bucky pleaded. "Trust me, I really want to me too. It's only been 7 days but it felt like months."

"Yeah, for me as well." You said. You let out a sigh. "I can't wait 'til we're there." You smiled at him.

"I'm hitting the gas, babydoll." Bucky smirked. "C'mon, close your eyes. We'll be there soon." You nodded before taking a more comfortable position on your seat and then you closed your eyes, your fingers tangled with Bucky's.

  
  


\---

  
  


You opened your eyes and found Bucky leaning over you and caressing your hair. At first you were confused but you quickly rememberd where you were, you glanced outside and saw that it was very dark.

"Are we there?" You asked.

"Almost. We're at a gas station, since we're gonna stay in the cabin we need to buy a few things." He explained to you.

"Okay." You both got out of the car and headed to the convenience store. "Something in particular you feel like eating?" You asked Bucky.

"I only got one craving and it's you, babydoll." The winter soldier whispered in your ear as you walked through the aisles. You shivered as you blushed.

You and Bucky bought food and a few hygienic products, you didn't know if the cabin had everything you'd need so you prefered to be safe than sorry. Then you got back in the car and went on the road for forty-five minutes until you finally made it to the forest.

"At long last." You sighed while getting out of the car. It's been four hours since you left the tower, it was almost midnight.

"Grab the keys, they're in my pocket." Bucky said after he picked up your bags in the trunk. "That's not the keys, doll." He smirked at you while you had your hand in the front pocket of his jeans.

"Please, shut up." You replied. You put your hand in the other pocket and finally got the keys. "It's really pretty." You commentated as you eyed the cabin. You could only make out its shadow illuminated by the moonlight but it looked huge and comfortable. You walked towards the door, you put the keys in and unlocked it. You immediately started coughing. "Damn, it's dusty." Bucky walked in after you and put the bags down.

"It's cozy." Your boyfriend added as he turned on the light switch. The electricity worked at least.

"You can go take a shower first if you want, I'll clean up around here a bit." You said to him as you took the grocery bag and put it on the table before putting the food in the fridge.

"Are you sure?" He asked you.

"Yeah, you can also check if the hot water works that way."

"Fine." Bucky took you both's bags and carried them upstairs. Fifteen minutes later he came back downstairs and found you with a broom between your hands. "Bathroom's all yours." He threw at you.

"Great-" You replied without lifting your eyes up. "I'm almost done here and then I'll-" You finally raised your head towards him and instantly your jaw dropped.

"What?" He asked you with a playful smirk. Bucky was literally just wearing a towel around his hips, his hair and body were still wet and the view made you hot and bothered. Was it you or did he get even buffier than he already was? You were pretty sure he could cut through steel if he wanted to judging by how sharp his muscles were.

"Ugh." You let out annoyed. The winter soldier took a few steps towards you and you stopped him. "Oh no, please, let me shower first. Don't come near me." You begged him.

"You got 5 minutes doll, or I swear I'll join you in there and don't bother locking the door, there's no key." You bit onto your lower lip before climbing up the stairs to go into the bathroom. You had never showered this fast before.

  
  


When you came out of the bathroom Bucky was already in the bed waiting for you. You were both only wearing your towels. You looked around a bit in the bedroom since you didn't have time to go on a tour of the cabin since you came here. It looked very pretty and warm, it was welcoming.

"I see you've already made yourself comfortable." You said to your boyfriend.

"This bed is way too cold without you in it, doll." You smiled as you walked towards him. You climbed on the bed and Bucky took you in his arms as you sat between his legs. You let out a sigh of relief. God, it felt like the last time he touched you was forever ago.

"I missed you." You said softly to him as you wrapped your arms around his neck.

"So did I, baby." Bucky leaned on you to put a kiss against your lips and then he put several kisses everywhere on your face while you giggled.

"I'm so in love with you." You smiled warmly as he kissed your face.

"You keep saying things like that to me and it makes me want to ravage you." Bucky said sensually against your neck before biting you. You gasped quietly as you blushed.

"Bucky..~" You breathed his name as he kissed your neck.

"Can I?" The winter soldier whispered as he put his hand on the knot you made on the towel.

"Yes." You replied. Bucky raised his head to your level and crashed his lips against yours, kissing you deeply as he got rid of the towel around your body. He threw it somewhere on the floor and then brought you closer against him. You shivered as the cold air brushed against your body, your hair was still wet and you had drops of water falling on your skin.

"I'll warm you up." He promised you as he ran his flesh hand on the side of your waist and felt the goosebumps on your skin. Bucky left a trail of kisses from your collarbone to you chest until his mouth closed around one of your nipples. He licked and sucked on it as he held you against him, you were far too excited to mind the coldness of his metal arm around your back.

"Ow!" You squealed when Bucky playfully bit you, it surprised you but you didn't hate it. You ran your hand through his hair as he continued kissing your chest. Then he bit you again but this time on the side boob and you _moaned_.

"I think we found your kink." Bucky chuckled against your skin. Your eyes widened.

"Oh my God." You blushed. Fuck, maybe he was right, you did start to dig it.

"It's fine." He smirked. "It will make things more interesting now." He held you by the waist before lifting you a bit off him and laying you on the bed. Bucky kneeled in front of your legs and you had an idea of what he was about to do but you had enough of receiving, you wanted to give.

"Bucky, wait." You said as you took a sitting position on the bed.

"Something wrong?" He asked you.

"No, no, everything is perfect." You reassured him. "I-I just..." You bit onto your lower lip. "You do a lot for me and don't get me wrong, it feels amazing-" You smiled. "But this time I-I want to do something for you." You finally let out.

"What do you want to do?" He asked you a bit surprised and confused as well. A blush had crept on your cheeks.

"I want to do the same thing that you did to me." You bit onto your lower lip before continuing as you looked down. "I want to kiss... your body." You said. Bucky's eyebrows rised.

"Are you sure?" He asked you.

"Hmm." You nodded. "Please."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for always leaving y'all hanging lmao I'm just trying to respect the "2.8 - 3k" words per chapter so it allows me to post updates everyday at least.


	38. Vacation

You inversed your position with Bucky on the bed and this time he was the one laying on the bed. You went on your fours above him and then leaned to catch his lips in a passionate kiss. Bucky started running his hands on your body but you firmly seized his wrists and pushed them on each side of his head against the mattress. You took a hold of his hands and tangled your fingers with his while you french kissed.

"Doll-" The winter soldier breathed against your lips. You buried your head in the crook of his neck and started kissing him there as well. "You turn me on so much." He said. You felt him shiver under you and it excited you, you had never done something so bold and the fact that Bucky seemed to like it pleased you a lot.

You let go of his hands as you went further down on his body. You left a trail of kisses on his torso and rested your hands on his hips. When you reached his navel you put your hands on the hem of his towel. Only the lamp on the nightstand was emeting light in the room and it made you clearly see the shadow of Bucky's bulge against the fabric.

"I'm gonna remove this now." You spoke to him.

"Please." He let out in a desperate voice. You untied the knot on his towel and threw it away somewhere on the floor. His dick stood proudly in front of your face and you couldn't help blushing, it intimidated you. Your fingers closed around the shaft and Bucky let out a low sigh. You rememberd what he said to you during your first time so you held it a little bit more firmly and then you start moving your hand up and down.

The winter soldier's thighs quivered in reaction to what you were doing. You pumped his dick a tad faster and as the little veins started to appear on the side you felt it throb against your hand. You took a deep breath before kneeling closer in front of his thighs and then you leaned to put a kiss on top of the tip. You started giving it a few cat-like licks before your lips closed around the head.

"Fuck..." You heard Bucky curse quietly. You sucked on the tip before opening your mouth a little more and then you put more of his length past your lips. You were careful to not touch him with your teeth. He was big and thick so there was no way you could put all of it inside your mouth. You pumped with your hand what you couldn't fit inside as you sucked. "Babydoll, look at me please." You raised your head a little and locked eyes with Bucky as you sucked. Fuck, he looked so hot. His face was red and his expression lost in pleasure. He brought his hand on your head and moved your hair out of the way so he could look at your pretty face bringing him to the edge.

"Hmm..." You moaned as you sucked your boyfriend's dick and the vibrations of your voice drove Bucky crazy. He started unconsciously and slowly thrusting his hips against your mouth, his tip rubbed against the back of your mouth but he wasn't choking you yet so it wasn't uncomfortable. You brought your free hand to his testicles and gently massaged them between your fingers. Bucky threw his head back and groaned in pleasure. You had a mix of precum and saliva running down your chin, it tasted sour and it wasn't pleasant but after seeing the winter soldier look so turned on you didn't want to stop, you wanted him to reach climax.

"Doll, I'm close-" He warned you. You took him out of your mouth and gave his length long licks on the sides before putting him back inside and sucking deeply. You held onto his muscled thighs as you bobbed your head up and down fast to help him orgasm. "S-Stop or I'm gonna-" He let out another deep moan. "In your mouth..."

"It's fine." You said.

"Oh f-fuck..!" Bucky pushed his hips and you held your breath before taking him deeper. He held your head as he suddenly came inside your mouth with a groan. You choked a bit not expecting your mouth to get flooded with his warm cum. "Shit! I'm so sorry." He apologized before taking a sitting position. "Spit it in my hand." He said as he opened his hand in front of your face. You shaked your head and got up to walk into the bathroom to wash your mouth. You had cum dripping down your chin to your neck and the taste in your mouth was not pleasant at all. "Are you okay?" Bucky asked you with worry when you came back, he looked so sorry.

"Yeah, don't worry." You replied as you joined him back on the bed and sat next to him. "I-I'm sorry, that must've not been sexy at all." You joked. Bucky looked at you as he smiled.

"You're the sexiest thing I've ever seen." He said before putting his hand behind your head and bringing your face against his to kiss you passionately. "I love you, doll." Bucky breathed against your lips. You smiled as you wrapped your arms around his neck.

"Come, I'm sleepy." You said as you laid on the bed and hurried him to join you.

"Wait-" He said as he laid next to you. "You don't want me to... take care of you?" Your boyfriend asked as he caressed your side.

"Hmm, don't worry. I just want to cuddle." You smiled. "Hold me." You asked in a cute voice.

"Oh, then I'm gonna cuddle the heck out of you." Bucky said playfully. You giggled while he opened his arms for you to snuggle up against him. He kissed your forehead while you wrapped your arms around him.

"Oh my God, you did get buffier." You said as you looked at his flesh bicep wrapped around your body. "I thought I noticed it earlier but I wasn't sure."

"Well, I've been training day and night for 7 days." He replied.

"You're so hot it's unfair for everyone else." You said and he laughed next to you. You traced the long vein on his arm with your finger while you were lost in your thoughts. You leaned on him and left a trail of soft kisses on his arm. "I love you." You said quietly.

"You only love me for my arms." He teased.

"As if your arms were the only good thing about you." You rolled your eyes.

"What do you love about me?" Bucky asked you. You bit onto your lower lip.

"Everything." You replied.

"That's too easy, give me a specific thing." He replied.

"Okay." You smiled. "I love your kindess." You said. "Your care, your respect... I've never met someone like you who treated someone like me the way you did. Especially since we were strangers."

"You're talking about the sandwich episode?" He asked.

"Yes but not only. I remember when Thor and I had our misunderstanding and even though we barely knew each other and really you had no reason to stand up for me... You did." You said with a smile. "And then you even took me outside to eat because you knew that the kitchen in the tower was the last place I wanted to be in." Bucky rememberd and started grinning.

"Remember how mad Tony was?" He asked you and you laughed.

"Oh my God, yes." Then you eventually stopped laughing as more of the memories of your first week came into mind. "I don't think I ever thanked you for staying with me during breakfast when Steve made toasts."

"I remember what I felt when you grabbed my sleeve to stay with you. That was the first time in a really long time that my heart had made a little jump." He confessed.

"Bucky..." You let out, he had knocked air out of your lungs with that secret. You brought your hand to his cheek and caressed it as you stared into his eyes. Bucky leaned on you and kissed your lips, you hummed pleasantly.

"Alright, it's time to sleep now. It's very late and we gotta get up early." You nodded and turned your body to turn off the lamp on the nightstand on your side.

"Goodnight, I love you." You reminded him again before closing your eyes.

"Goodnight, babydoll." Bucky put a kiss against your forehead before grabbing the blanket and covering your naked bodies. He held you in his arms and then finally closed his eyes.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Is that her?"

"Yes. Tell her your name and she will hand you the envelope." Bucky looked at you before you went to meet the undercover agent. "You can do this, doll. Just act normally and don't worry, I got your back." You nodded and then got out of the car.

You were surprised when Tony warned you this mission would rest on your shoulders only. No wonder SHIELD sent you and Bucky, I mean who else would've done a better job dedicated to protect you besides your boyfriend? Suddenly you two being a couple became an advantage to the Avengers.

The undercover agent was working with a suspicious group the SHIELD kept a close eye on and she regularly sent reports to Fury but since a lot of their private informations got leaked the group became doubtful about their employees which meant everyone was always being watched. That meant, of course, no Avengers could go retrieve her report besides you. You were not known to the grand public and a lot of the Avengers and SHIELD agents had no idea who you were. The group couldn't have heard of you either so you were the only one who could do this.

"Hey, sorry to bother you." You said as you approached her car. Her window was down, she was waiting for someone, you obviously. "I'm looking for the closest airport, can you help me please?"

"Of course." She replied to you with a smile. You had to create this fake conversation because you've been warned you could be recorded at the moment. After all she was being monitored by the group. She started giving you directions just in case you were not the one she was waiting for. She was only told by SHIELD to wait for someone called [Y/N] and give them the report.

"I'm really sorry but it seems kinda far away and I'm afraid to forget the directions, could you please write it down?" You let out a fake sigh. "I'm sorry, I know I must be a bother. I'm [Y/N] by the way." You said as you gave her your hand. You saw her raise one eyebrow before she shaked your hand.

"Of course, don't worry about it. I always keep a notebook in the glove box." She opened it and pulled out an envelope.

"Thanks a lot." You said as you grabbed it. "Have a good day." You waved in a friendly manner at her and then you crossed the road to join Bucky back in the car.

"Good job, doll." He praised you as you climbed in the passenger seat with the report in your hand.

"I expected this to go really badly." You let out.

"That's because you were stressed but see? You made it." He grinned before putting a kiss on your head. Then he started the car and drove away.

"Where are we going?" You asked.

"I don't know... Do you wanna grab some burgers? I don't feel like driving back to the cabin." He said.

"Sure." You shrugged. It was around 11am at the moment. You and Bucky had woken up early but the meeting place with the agent was two hours drive away from your place at the forest so you understood your boyfriend needed a rest. As he drove you put your hand on his nape and caressed his hair. He glanced in your direction and you smiled at him.

"I would do so much for you." Bucky said as he faced forward to watch the road and your heart missed a beat.

"You already do." You said with a warm expression. "So, after this... Do we get back to the tower?"

"I don't think so." Bucky smirked.

"Aren't we gonna get in trouble?" You asked.

"We can stay 2 or 3 days, it's fine." He said. "And that's the least they can do for us, we were separated for a week."

"Are you saying we can stay together at the cabin for a few days? Just the two of us?" You smiled.

"That's exactly what I'm saying, babydoll." You grew really excited you couldn't help your lips curving into a grin. "Do you want to stay with me, just the two of us, at the cabin?"

"Are you kidding?" You asked. "I'm the happiest, Bucky. This is like vacation." You said as you took one of his hands that wasn't on the wheel and squeezed it in yours. "Say..."

"What?" He asked.

"No, nothing... Nevermind." You brushed off.

"No, tell me." He said. "Wait, did you change your mind? You wanna go to the tower?" The winter soldier worried.

"No!" You said louder than you intended to. "No, no, it's not that." You said.

"What then?" You bit onto your lower lip.

"I... just really want to kiss you right now." You let out with a blush on your cheeks.

"Is that so?" He raised one eyebrow with a playful smirk. "So what you want is for me to pull over and make out with you in the backseat huh?"

"I-I'm just suggesting we can eat later..." You said as you stared by the window. "For now I have a different craving..." You muttered.

"What was that?" He had indeed heard you.

"Nothing..." You said lowly. Bucky looked around for a discreet place to pull over and after some time he finally did. There was an abandoned construction site and it was a bit far from the road so no passing cars could be able to see you both. You smiled when you noticed he drove on a path that didn't seem to lead to your first destination.

"Climb in there." Bucky pointed to the backseat after he stopped the car.

"Yes, sir." You replied before opening the door of the passenger seat to open the one in the backseat. The winter soldier joined you soon enough.

"Sit on me." He ordered you. You bit onto your lower lip as you took the hand he was giving and then proceeded to straddle his lap. "Why did you suddenly want to kiss me?" He asked you with half lidded eyes as he stared into yours.

"I-It just made me really happy when you said we could stay at the cabin." You replied.

"How happy?" He asked.

"Excited..."

"Hmm?"

"Turned on." You finally admitted.

"That's what I wanted to hear." Bucky smirked before leaning on you and catching your lips with his for a deep sensual kiss. You let out a satisfied hum as he kissed you, God, did that feel good. You wrapped your arms around his neck and you were about to deepen the kiss but then Bucky broke it making your brows furrow.

"Please-" You whined in frustration.

"Look at you, you're so needy." He chuckled. Bucky wrapped his metal arm around your waist and brought you closer to him. "Don't worry. I got you, babydoll." The winter soldier smirked before leaning on you and pulling on your lower lip with his.

"Bucky, please stop teasing me..." You pouted. "I really want you." You blushed.

"How can I not?" He laughed "You're so adorable." You rolled your eyes.

"You know what?" You sighed. "Nevermind, you killed my mood." You said.

"You stay right there." He held you firmly in place before you were going to get off his lap. You stared at him with an upset face before saying fuck it and leaning on him to crash your lips against his. Bucky put his hand behind your head and kissed you deeply. The kiss was all teeth, tongues and gross sounds, you literally sucked each other's faces. Then you broke the kiss to bury your head in the crook of his neck. You kissed and licked on his skin there while your hand had crept behind his head, you pulled on Bucky's hair to make him lift his head so you had more spaces to leave lovebites on. The winter soldier groaned in pleasure, he ran his hands on your sides and thighs until his flesh one went between your legs.

"Hnn..!" You gasped against his chin as you were leaving kisses on his jaw.

"Do you want it?" Bucky whispered next to your ear. Fuck, yes, you did.

"Please." You begged quietly.

"Tell me what you want." He ordered you.

"Please touch me, Bucky." You said to him as you looked into each other's eyes. The winter soldier smirked before he started rubbing your crotch through your clothes. "Please, more." You shivered.

"Take off your pants."

"What? Here?" You asked.

"You're fine, there's no one around." He reassured you. You hesitated for a second but honestly you wanted this so badly you quickly made up your mind and then proceeded to sit next to him on the backseat to remove your shoes and bottoms.

"Keep your panties on." He said to you with a playful smile.

"You're such a pervert." You rolled your eyes before you straddled back his lap with your underwear on. His metal hand rested on one of your buttcheeks while he rubbed your front with his flesh one. Bucky moved your panties a bit to the side to expose your crotch and then he stared at your wet and dripping pussy.

"You're so beautiful." He praised you with a smile on his face and even though you should be used to this by now you couldn't help blushing and being intimidated by him staring at you.

"Bucky, you're so embarrassing." You let out as your face reddened. He chuckled before leaning on you and putting a kiss on your nose. He separated your slit with two fingers and kept staring down the whole time. "Bucky, you're still staring." You reminded him.

"I'm mesmerized." The winter soldier let out in an excited tone. "Don't worry, I'll look at your face soon enough." He promised with a smirk. Then he pushed his two fingers flat against your clit and you held your breath. He slided these two fingers on your pussy until they teased your entrance and he circled your clit with his thumb. You leaned on your boyfriend to rest your head on his shoulder while he rubbed you and then you closed your eyes, focusing on what he made you feel.

 


	39. Perfect

The following day you woke up first as the sun light shined brightly on your face almost blinding you when you opened your eyes. You and the winter soldier went to bed pretty early in the night. You were very tired from all the driving and Bucky started getting new headaches so he held you close against his body in the bed while you healed him.

The mission was a success and now you had three days left to enjoy some privacy with your boyfriend at the cabin in the woods. You couldn't be happier.

You carefully slipped out of Bucky's arms and got out of bed to join the bathroom. You took a shower and then headed downstairs to prepare breakfast. You were surprised to find the house was exceptionnally well taken care of. Everything worked perfectly, the cupboards, drawers and closets were full, it's as if even if nobody lived here someone continued to preserve it... Which was probably the case knowing Tony Stark. Though a very lazy person you thought since you remember it was super dusty when you stepped in for the first time.

You opened the fridge and the cupboards to check what you could prepare, you wanted to do something special for Bucky. You had never cooked for anybody before and so you hoped it would make him happy. You had what to make a tart crust from scratch and you had bought a few fruits at the convenience store so you decided to bake an apple pie.

You heard the water run upstairs while your pie was in the oven and so you smiled as you had guessed the winter soldier had awoken. You started brewing coffee and then put on the table, you felt like you were in a dream, everything was perfect and lovely. Ten minutes later your boyfriend came downstairs.

"Good morning, Bucky." You smiled at him when you glanced in his direction.

"Hey, hottie." He threw at you with a wink. "God, what smells so good in here?" He asked as he walked towards you.

"Coffee? Pie?" You answered as Bucky wrapped his arms around your stomach from behind and kissed your nape. "Go sit, I think it's ready." You said as you escaped his grasp and opened the oven. You put on the oven mitts and took the pie out to put it on the counter.

"Did you make this?" Bucky asked you as he watched you work while he was sitting around the table.

"Hmm." You nodded. "I never cooked for somebody before, I hope it's not too bad." You said after you put the still steaming hot pie on a plate and brought it to the table. "Ah, it's way too hot. I should've baked it earlier." You added with a sad expression after you grabbed a kitchen knife.

"It's fine, I can wait." He smiled at you. "Come here." You walked towards him as he backed up with the chair he was sitting on. The winter soldier spread his legs and made you sit on one of his thighs. "You're perfect." Bucky let out as he stared into your eyes with a loving expression.

"I-" You were speechless, he had knocked air out of your lungs. You smiled warmly as you wrapped your arms around his neck and stared back at him. "Bucky..."

"I love when you say my name like that." He said happily. You felt his arms get tighter around your waist. "Kiss me."

"Don't have to ask me twice." You grinned before leaning on your boyfriend and kissing him passionately. Then you stopped and got up before getting hot and bothered. "Your coffee's gonna get cold." You said as you walked towards the counter and poured him a mug. "Here you go." You handed him his cup and then sat on a chair next to him.

"Thanks." He said before he took a sip.

"Is your head better by the way?" You rememberd his headaches from last night so you asked.

"Yeah, though I don't think I'm gonna take the car." He said.

"It's fine, we don't have to be anywhere today." You reached for his free hand and took it in yours. "If the pain's back, tell me."

"How did I get myself such a perfect girlfriend?" Bucky asked with a little smirk.

"Oh, shut up." You blushed. He brought your hand to his lips and kissed your palm. And as always it made your heart skip a beat. "The pie should be good now." You said as you grabbed the knife and cut him a slice. You put it on his plate and waited for verdict.

"You're not gonna feed me?" He asked you as he raised his head to look at you with his goddamn puppy eyes that got you everytime. You rolled your eyes and approached your chair to his, it was useless to argue, Bucky always got his way with you.

"Open your mouth." You said to him with annoyance after you grabbed his fork and picked up a small piece of apple pie.

"Blow on it."

"Bucky, I swear to God-"

"It's steaming..."

"Ugh." You sighed before blowing gently on the fork and then brought it back towards his face. He, at long last, opened his mouth and let you feed him. Your crossed your arms on your chest as he chewed waiting for his comment. Bucky said nothing and it started to worry you. "So? I-Is it that bad?" You asked. "I shouldn't have made the crust from scratch..." Your brows furrowed in disappointment in yourself.

"Babydoll, it's delicious." Bucky finally let out. Your face light up.

"Really??" You asked.

"You taste it." He said after he picked up the fork and a piece of the pie with it before blowing on it as well and bringing it to your mouth. You let him feed you and he was right, your pie tasted fine.

"It's good, indeed." You said happily. "Still too hot though."

"Oh, you mean just like you?" You raised your eyes to the sky before glancing at your boyfriend and smiling.

"You're annoying but you're lucky I still love you." You said to him.

"That I agree on, I'm the luckiest man alive." He grinned.

"You never stop, do you?" You asked with a little giggle. "C'mon, eat your pie. You're the first person I've cooked for."

"I'm honored." Bucky replied as he put his hands against his heart before taking a more serious expression. "Thank you, I'm really moved by the gesture."

"As long as it pleases your taste I'm happy." You said with a smile.

"Well, it does." He said truthfully. "Come back on my lap and feed me, doll."

"Fine." You complied.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Bucky? Where are you?" You asked in a sleepy voice as you had just woken up from a nap. The winter soldier had slept with you but now you were alone in the bed. You checked the time next to you, it was almost 4pm. You got up and searched for your boyfriend on the first floor, he wasn't in the bathroom or the other rooms so you went down. "Bucky?" You called again. Nobody in the kitchen, living room or entrance hall.

You grabbed the doorknob of the entrance door and opened it before taking a few steps outside. You noticed the car was still here so even if he wasn't in the house he must be somewhere around here. Maybe he went jogging or something?

Then you heard it. The sound of water splashing.

There was a lake behind the cabin and even though it was still pretty sunny outside you started praying to God those noises were made by a wild swan and not your crazy boyfriend.

You walked towards the lake to check what was making those sounds in the water and when you saw familiar clothes against a huge boulder you pinched the bridge of your noise in frustration and annoyance. This couldn't be real. Bucky couldn't be this reckless.

"Doll?" You saw ther winter soldier's head pop out of the water and stare at you in confusion.

"What are you doing??" You asked in despair.

"What?" He asked as if what he was doing was totally normal. "It was sunny and I wanted to go for a swim. Why don't you join me?" You saw him smirk.

"Are you mad??" You asked. "There's probably dead bugs in there and... diseases. Oh my God, I have to get you to a hospital." You let out as you took your head between your hands.

"Doll, I'm fine." Bucky brushed off. He started coming towards you and as he gradually came out of the water your eyes wandered on his upper body, his skin was wet and illuminated by the sun light you almost got lost staring until he came out _entirely_ and you gasped loudly.

"Y-You're naked!" You hid your eyes and turned around to avoid looking at him.

"What? It's nothing you haven't seen." He chuckled.

"My powers won't be enough to heal you and clean you from everything you must've catched in there." You panicked a bit.

"Doll, animals drink from there and they're fine." Bucky laughed before approaching you.

"N-No, no, no!" You said as you escaped him after he tried to stick his body against yours from behind. "Please put your clothes back on and go take a warm and long shower." You said.

"Will you join me?" He smirked.

"And risk to get an infection? No way. I can heal you if you did catch something but I'm afraid you can't return the favor and SHIELD won't allow me to die at the moment." You explained.

"I won't either." He raised one eyebrow. "Fine, I'll go take that shower." The winter soldier picked up his clothes and walked towards the cabin. You let out a sigh after you stared at his bare butt. He really had no shame.

  
  


\---

  
  


"There's nothing interesting on." Bucky let out as he flipped channels with the tv remote.

"Damn. And there's no DVD around here either." You said. It was nighttime and so you thought about distracting yourselves watching tv but seems like nothing was on. You were laying on top of bucky on the couch, he had his arm wrapped around the lower of your back while your hand and head rested against his chest.

"Do you want to watch the sports channel?" He asked.

"Ugh." You rolled your eyes.

"The... adult channel?" You raised your head to look at him.

"Bucky, no." You said with furrowed brows.

"Could get us in the mood..." He smirked.

"Because you planned to..? Tonight?" You asked.

"Doll, I don't think there's a moment where I don't want to."

"Oh my God..." You blushed.

"I'm gonna put it on and you're free to decide if you want to watch or not." He smiled.

"Why do you always pull me into doing embarrassing stuff like this?" You sighed.

"You're just so adorable when you're flustered." The winter soldier let out a small laugh as he flipped channels until he found was he was looking for.

"Oh lord, it's not even censored." You said as you turned your head the other way to avoid watching.

"It's just human bodies." He brushed off.

"Yeah but I've never seen theirs..." You replied.

"You literally have to touch people to heal them." He reminded you.

"Buck! I've never touched other people's... private parts... or seen them for that matter." You said.

"What's the most you've seen?"

"Chests. Men and women's." You replied as you rememberd those memories.

"What's wrong?" Bucky asked as he noticed a change in your expression.

"You remember when I told you I used to heal wealthy people in exchange of money or food?"

"Hmm." He nodded.

"And I also said some of them tried to take advantage of me because they needed my power for themselves so they tried to manipulate me." You continued. Bucky wrapped both arms around your waist as he kept listening to you.

"You don't have to tell me anything if you don't want to." He reassured you.

"No, I want to. Don't worry I haven't been... abused if that's where you think I was going with this." You said. "At least not _physically_ but there was this guy... His family was rich and I met him through his father that I healed... To make a real long story short, he pretended to seduce me, to charm me, that he was interested in me so I could marry him." You let out.

"That's awful." Bucky replied.

"Yeah." You smiled sadly. "And it really broke me." You took a deep breath before continuing. "They let me live in their manor and one night he came into my room. He climbed onto my bed and started hugging me and stuff... I pushed him off me when he started taking his clothes off and he got very angry. He started insulting me, calling me names, telling me how repulsive I am until he finally admitted he did it all so his family could keep me and my powers just for them. He got out of my room when I started crying, I took my backpack and filled it with the few things I had and I ran away." You sighed. "I never saw them ever again." You concluded.

"I'm really sorry you had to go through that." Bucky said as he caressed your hair.

"It's in the past." You sighed. "Now, I have you and I love you." You said with a smile as you stared into your boyfriend's eyes. The winter soldier leaned forward and catched your lips with his.

"No one will ever hurt you as long as I'm here." Bucky promised you. You brought your hands to his face and caressed his cheeks as you smiled and looked at him. "I'm in love with you."

"I'm in love with you too, Bucky and you make me really happy." You kissed him passionately. "Do... you want to go upstairs maybe?" You asked.

"Now you're in the mood?" He raised one eyebrow as he chuckled lowly.

"You telling me you love me is my biggest turn on, Bucky." You smirked playfully.

"Ooh, you should've kept that to yourself." He said and you bit onto your lower lip. Bucky turned off the tv with the remote while you got off him and the couch. "Wait." He stopped you as you started walking towards the stairs. He came behind you and suddenly the winter soldier picked you up bridal style in his arms.

"Bucky!" You gasped and then you wrapped your arms around his neck out of fear of falling. "You can't climb the stairs with me, you're gonna fall and break your neck!"

"You really gotta stop underestimating my strength, doll." He winked and proceeded to climb the stairs. You smiled as he looked at you.

"I'm really turned on right now." You whispered to his ear and Bucky shivered. He stepped inside the bedroom and then dropped you on the bed before climbing on top of you. He kissed your neck as his hands traveled on your body until his lips found yours and you started french kissing. You ran your hands on his back and then slipped them under his shirt at the front, you caressed his torso, his skin was warm and it felt pleasant against your palms. "Hnn!" You moaned against the kiss when his hand went between your legs.

"I got you, babydoll." Bucky breathed against your lips.

"Bucky..." You whined when he broke the kiss.

"I'll keep kissing you, don't worry." He leaned back and put his hands on each side of your hips, he grabbed the hem of your pants and slid them off in one swift motion along with your panties. He threw them somewhere on the floor then the winter soldier spread your legs and with his hands he pushed on the back of your knees with a strong hold on them.

"F-Fuck!" You cursed when Bucky licked a long stripe between your slit. He kissed your pussy lips and circled your clit with his tongue, he had you whining under him as you wished he'd stop teasing you. "B-Bucky, please..."

"What?" He raised his head to look at you as he smirked, he put a kiss right on top of your slit avoiding your clit.

"Please kiss me... where it feels good." You let out as you blushed.

"Anything for my girl." He lowered his head and this time he ran his tongue flat against your clit.

"Aaah!" You moaned. You gripped your pillow and the sheet in your fists until your knuckles turned white, what he was doing felt amazingly good. Your thighs trembled as he ate you out and something in your lower stomach felt incredible. Bucky moved his body forward so his hand could reach one of yours then he grabbed it and put it on his head. Right, you rememberd he liked having his hair pulled and so you did.

"Hnng..!" The winter soldier groaned against your pussy as he licked and sucked on your clit, you threw your head back and closed your eyes as you kept moaning louder and louder. You held onto his hair like if it was a lifesaver and you were about to drown.

"I-I'm so close, please don't stop!" You begged him. Bucky licked you faster and then you were gone, the knot in your lower stomach broke and suddenly you saw all white. Your hips unconsciously grinded against his face as your orgasm washed over you. Bucky put your legs back down and gently caressed your thighs until you stopped shaking.

"You're so beautiful." He praised you. The winter soldier climbed back on top of you and catched your mouth for a long kiss. You were pretty sure you could taste yourself on his tongue but you didn't care, you always felt butterflies flutter in your stomach when he kissed you so passionately like that.

"Give me a minute to catch my breath back and then I'll take care of you." You said while you stared at the ceiling, your chest was rising up and down as you panted.

 


	40. I Don't Deserve You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We really 40 chapters in this huh

"Doll?"

"Hmm?"

"Oh, I thought you slept." Bucky chuckled as he turned his head to look at you.

"Don't worry, I can still go." You smiled as you looked at him as well.

"Say... I want to try something new..." He started. Oh God.

"W-What do you mean?" You asked a bit nervously.

"Do you want to be on top?" Oh thanks God, you thought he wanted to have a threesome or worse... put it in the back. "Why are you smiling?"

"Nothing, don't worry." You replied.

"So, do you want to try?" The winter soldier asked again as he sticked his body to yours and started rubbing your stomach through your top.

"I-I guess I can, yeah." You replied. "Would that make you happy?"

"Very." He replied with a smirk. You took a sitting position and Bucky proceeded to lay in the middle of the bed. You went on your fours above him and started by kissing him to put you both back in the mood. Bucky playfully pulled on your lower lip with his teeth before pushing his tongue past your lips and kissing you deeper. You broke the kiss and leaned back to sit on his hips, he was still way too clothed for this.

"Come." You said as you grabbed his hands and made him sit. You grabbed the hem of his shirt and took it off him then threw it on the floor. You stared at your boyfriend with hungry eyes, his body was just so perfect, even with his metal arm or scars you didn't care, you loved all of him. You smiled at Bucky before gently pushing on his shoulders and making him lay back on the bed. His back had literally just hit the mattress that you were already leaning on him and leaving soft kisses on his body.

"Hmm, [Y/N]..." The winter soldier sighed your name pleasantly. You kissed him further down until you reached his abdomen and left a few kisses there too. You grabbed the hem of his sweatpants and pulled them down, Bucky raised his hips a little so you could slide them more easily and then you saw his dick spring free. You were surprised to find he didn't wear underwear.

"I thought I had felt something when I was laying on you on the couch." You said as you raised one eyebrow.

"How did you think the idea of you topping me came?" He smirked. You bit onto your lower lip as you looked into his eyes before you finally got rid of his pants and put them away. You sat on his thighs and then grabbed his dick in your hand, you started pumping it to get him hard before putting it inside you. "Oh, fuck..." Bucky breathed.

"Bucky, you're so hot." You let out as you looked at him, he was flustered and his face was red, you loved that sight. "You really turn me on." You added. The winter soldier took a sitting position and then he put a hand behind your head and crashed his mouth against yours. You kissed him deeply and kept pumping him. Bucky moaned against your lips and it made you smile. You leaned on his kiss and he laid back on the bed.

"Rub it between your pussy." He asked you after breaking the kiss. Your eyes widened.

"B-Buck!" You put your free hand against his mouth and blushed. The crude talk really ashamed you. Bucky kissed your hand before playfully licking your palm.

"You're disgusting." You rolled your eyes as you brought your hand back to yourself and wiped your palm on your top.

"I think you and I both licked wor-"

"I'm begging you to stop talking." You said.

"Fine." Bucky smirked. "But please do it, rub yours against mine." Your face turned a darker shade of red, you were so embarrassed. You let out a low sigh before bringing your hips closer to his, your lowered yourself on him and your slit finally came in contact with his dick. You put your hands against Bucky's abdomen for support and then you started grinding on him. Oh fuck, he was right, it did feel good. "You're doing so well, babydoll." He praised you.

"Hh!" You gasped when Bucky put his metal hand on your hip.

"Sorry..." He muttered. "Don't be afraid to sit on me, I can see your thighs shaking, you're supporting your weight on your legs."

"B-But..." You started.

"I thought I told you, doll-" He interrupted you. "I got what it takes to handle you." Bucky smirked. "Put it in and sit on me." He ordered you and you bit onto your lower lip.

"Okay..." You said quietly before grasping his dick back in your hand to guide it towards your entrance. "Please just don't move until I'm- until I tell you to." You corrected yourself. The winter soldier gently caressed your thighs while you lowered yourself on his length, thankfully it went in pretty easily, you were wet and turned on so your body naturally welcomed him but you still felt awfully full.

"You're okay, doll?" Bucky asked you.

"Hmm." You nodded. "You're just... a lot to take in." You let out.

"You flatter me." He chuckled.

"Don't make me laugh right now, Bucky." You said with a little smile.

"Do you want to try moving... or should I?" He asked. "You're squeezing me so tight and I'm dying to make you-"

"Alright, alright." You interrupted him before he said any more embarrassing things. "I-I'll do it." You took a deep breath as you leaned forward and placed your hands against Bucky's torso for support. Then you moved your hips and you both let out a quiet moan. God, that felt amazing. You found a nice slow pace for now and you grew more confident about this whole thing. You didn't know why or how but being on top was really intimidating, you felt much more vulnerable than when you were under the winter soldier.

"Doll, you're doing so great." Bucky breathed. He put his hands on each side of your waist and then he started thrusting his hips against yours as well. You let out a louder moan, his dick went deeper inside of you and reached new soft spots on your walls. You noticed your boyfriend grinned as he stared down.

"Are you staring again?" You asked. Bucky raised his head instantly and a little blush had crept on his cheeks as if he got caught on guard. He was about to speak but you stopped him. "Don't lie to me."

"Fine." He let out with a little smirk. "I'm sorry I can't stop, you're so pretty and taking me so well..." Bucky commentated as he lowered his gaze back from your face to between your legs. You started blushing and unconsciously you closed your thighs a bit, God, he was so embarrassing. Bucky brought his flesh hand to your crotch and before you could ask him what he was going to do he started flicking your clit with his thumb.

"F-Fuck!" You cursed out loud as you threw your head back. Bucky glanced at you as he brought his hand back to himself, he licked his thumb to wet it and then touched you again. His hips moved deeper and the combination of his dick rubbing inside of you and having your clit stimulated made you go crazy. You also moved your hips faster against his, you were starting to feel really good. "B-Bucky..." You moaned.

"I know, baby. You're great, you're doing amazing." Your boyfriend praised you. Bucky took a sitting position while you were still on him, he put a hand behind your head and brought you against him to kiss. You wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him back passionately while your hips still worked against him. Bucky slipped his hands under your top and grabbed your breasts, he smiled against the kiss nicely surprised to find you weren't wearing a bra. You shivered under his touch (and because of the coldness of the metal), your nipples became erected.

"Ow!" You shrieked.

"Sorry." Bucky smiled, probably not sorry at all after he pinched your left nipple between his fingers. He left a kiss on your lips, chin and neck until he got low enough, he pulled your top up and then catched your nipple in his mouth. He licked and sucked on it getting you to squirm against him. You ran one hand through his hair while the other rested on his shoulder for support. Bucky let go of your nipple and went to suck the other one to give it the same attention.

"B-Bucky... I'm close." You breathed.

"Let me finish you." He said after playfully biting the side of your breast. The winter soldier wrapped his arms around your waist and held you tightly against him as he went on his knees and turned his body to switch your positions. He laid you on the bed so he was on top this time. You sticked your thighs against his hips before he started thrusting faster and deeper inside of your pussy earning new loud moans from you.

"Please-" You ran your hands on his back. "Don't stop..!" You moaned louder.

"Look at me-" Bucky panted. You looked into his eyes with a blush on your cheeks.

"Please, tell me-" You got interrupted again as another sound of pleasure escaped past your lips but Bucky understood what you wanted to hear.

"I love you, doll." The winter soldier said as his hips hit roughly against yours, you felt like you were going to pass out because of all the pleasure he gave you. "I love you, you're so perfect." And then you were gone. You closed your eyes and let your orgasm consume you, your entire body shaked against your boyfriend's while he kept thrusting inside you. Bucky buried his head in the crook of your neck and soon enough his movements became slower as he emptied himself inside you with a low groan against your skin. Your hands gently caressed his hair and his back.

"I love you, Bucky." You whispered to him while he panted and tried to catch his breath back on top of you. You felt good and happy having your boyfriend hold you so tightly against him. Bucky raised his head to your level and left a kiss on your cheek and forehead before he pulled out of you and then laid on the bed next to you.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Come with me outside, I have a surprise for you." Bucky smiled at you as he took your hand.

"What? Really?" You started to grow a bit excited though you wondered what Bucky wanted outside at 9pm. The forest was very dark and you could barely see a thing. "Why didn't we go during daytime earlier? We did nothing all day."

"It has to be night." The winter soldier opened the entrance door of the cabin and lead you outside. Fortunately he held a flashlight so you could see your steps.

"Where are you taking me?" You asked.

"Just come, it's not very far." You followed him through the woods until you noticed he was headed towards the lake.

"I really hope you're not taking me skinny dipping." You said and Bucky let out a small laugh. As you walked you started to see something shine on the ground. Were those candles? "Oh my god, Bucky, what's this?" You asked as your eyes widened.

"Well, there's nothing on tv and our range of activities are pretty limited so I thought maybe you'd like to lay down with me here and look at the sky?" You put your hands against your cheeks.

"That's the most adorable thing you've ever done." You said to him with a bright smile. "I'd love to!" You said excitedly. "When did you do this?" You asked as you looked at what he had prepared. The winter soldier had laid blankets on the grass with a few pillows and he lighted some candles around so you could see something in this darkness.

"While you were under the shower." He replied.

"I don't deserve you, you're the best boyfriend in the world." You said as you approached him and wrapped your arms around his neck. "I love you." You said before kissing him softly.

"Making you happy is my everyday mission." Bucky said after you naturally broke the kiss. You stared at him with loving eyes before he invited you to lay on the blankets with him. You both kneeled and then laid on your backs to stare at the sky. Bucky brought you closer to him, you rested your head on his chest and he had his arm laid on your side.

"It's so beautiful." You commentated as you stared at the endless scenery. The stars were shining bright and the full moon was glowing, combined with the quiet tranquility of the woods you felt at peace.

"You're beautiful." Your boyfriend replied and you couldn't help smiling.

"I only feel beautiful in your eyes." You said. "And you're the only one who's opinion matter to me." You added. Bucky grabbed your hand and tangled his fingers with yours.

"I'm in love with you, [Y/N]." The winter soldier let out quietly and you felt really happy.

"Those few days... alone with you..." You started. "I've never been happier in my life, Bucky. We made memories that I'll never forget and that I will cherish for the rest of my life." You said. Bucky let go of your hand and instead he brought his to your cheek and caressed it while he stared deeply into your eyes. His heart beat very fast inside his chest, he was so in love with you.

"My precious doll..." Bucky said with a tender smile on his face before he leaned on you and kissed your lips. You stared back at him with a tiny smile as you licked your lips after he broke the kiss. You grabbed his hand again and turned your head to look back at the sky. You took a deep breath as you closed your eyes and as always, your brain never rested, you started thinking.

As you re-opened your eyes and stared at the sky, you felt so little at the moment. It was very quiet around you, you could just hear Bucky's breathing next to you and the leaves brushing against each other in the trees as the wind blew on them.

You thought about the tower and even if you really loved your time with Bucky here you missed your friends- no, your family. They were your real family, the Avengers. You wondered what they were up to at the moment and if they were staring at the same sky as you at the exact moment.

You wondered if Thor had came back from Asgard, you hoped things got better for his father and then you started thinking about him too of course... The God of mischief. As you stared back at the starry night sky you wondered if Loki could see the same thing as you from his planet but mostly you hoped he was doing well.

You'd be lying if you said you didn't miss him. You had friendly feelings for him only but you missed his jokes, his teasing, his vulnerability... The side of him he only showed to you. Even if it got better you had never stopped feeling bad for breaking his heart. Despite what everything thought of Loki and what he did, no one deserved to get their heart broken. You, out of all, people knew better.

While you were lost in your thoughts Bucky had shifted next to you, he kissed your hand before burying his head in the crook of your neck and kissing your skin there. You shivered under his touch as you closed your eyes but then you did the worst mistake you could've ever done while the winter soldier was kissing you.

"Loki..." You moaned.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> God, did I miss writing angst. See you next chapter :)


	41. You Don't Deserve Me

"What did you say?" Bucky asked in confusion. Your entire body froze as your eyes widened in realization. No, no, this couldn't be real, this couldn't be happening.

"I-I-" You stuttered.

"What did you say?" Bucky asked again but this time his tone was cold.

"B-Bucky, no, I-" You panicked. The winter soldier got off you and kneeled. You stared at his face in dreadful silent, his expression was indecipherable, he seemed so lost.

"You said Loki?" He asked.

"B-Bucky, no please, I was looking at the sky and I started thinking about Thor and-"

"You were thinking of Thor while I was kissing you?"

"No!" You said louder than you intended to. You took a sitting position before continuing. "I-I was thinking about the tower and I wondered if Thor came back a-and it's true I wondered if Loki was doing well b-but I promise you I wasn't-" You tried to grab his arm but he moved it away from you. "B-Bucky, please, listen to me..." Tears had appeard in the corner of your eyes. You could feel it, you could lose him at the moment.

Bucky got up and started walking away, leaving you alone on the blankets. You felt terribly cold. You needed to fix this immediately, you couldn't let him believe you still had feelings for the God of mischief because you **didn't**. It's Bucky who you loved. You grabbed the flashlight he left on the ground and returned to the cabin. He was inside.

"It's too late to drive back to the tower so we'll return tomorrow. I leave you the bed, I'll sleep on the couch." Bucky spoke but there was no life in his words, he sounded cold and _hurt_. You hated yourself.

"Please, let me explain." You begged him with a sad expression. "Bucky, I swear I wasn't-"

"Stop!" For the first time he yelled at you and you flinched on your spot. "You still haven't made your choice. You wanted us both for yourself."

"How can you say that?!" You let out as you cried. "You're the one I chose! It's with you I am at the moment!"

"You think I didn't notice?" Bucky let out a dry chuckle that sent an uncomfortable chill down your spine. "When Tony talked about Loki before the mission and you had a reaction. You think I didn't notice how widely you smiled when he said Fury accepted to make him an Avengers?" You were shocked.

"What are you trying to say?? Yes, I was happy for him because he deserves it and for the first time in my life I had made something to be proud of, I helped someone become better and that despite everyone telling me how much of a bad idea it was. I made something where my powers weren't needed. I know damn well that if I hadn't had this gift nobody would give a damn about me!"

"Oh no, don't victimize yourself now." Bucky spat at you.

"Why are you doing this?" You asked as you sobbed.

"I'm doing this?!" He let out angrily. "You moaned another man's name!" Bucky sat on the couch as he sighed deeply. "Go upstairs, I don't want to see you." He said tiredly.

"Buck-"

"Do I have to lock myself in the car to be alone??" For the first time Bucky glared at you. You bit onto your lower lip to stop it from trembling. You broke down in tears before climbing the stairs quickly. You dropped on the bed and cried all night. You didn't dare to go downstairs and make him angry again.

  
  


\---

  
  


You cried yourself to sleep and when you woke up you felt like shit. You dragged yourself to the bathroom still hoping this was just a bad dream and you would wake up in Bucky's arms, alas this was very much real. Under the shower you cried again, when you packed your bags you cried, when you put on clothes you cried, you eventually calmed down before going downstairs.

You were terrified. You were afraid of interacting with Bucky. Would he yell at you again? Would he straight up ignore you? You felt very weak, you knew that when you would cross eyes with him you would start crying again. You finally gathered some courage and went downstairs. The couch was empty and he wasn't in the kitchen, you looked by the window and saw Bucky next to car. He was probably checking if everything was fine before leaving. Four hours away from the tower. This was going to be a very long drive.

You saw the winter soldier coming back towards the cabin so you pretended you were busy doing whatever in the kitchen. You heard him enter and you knew he saw you despite you were giving your back to him and since he said nothing to you you decided you had to. You took a deep breath and turned around to face him.

"Hey." You started and gulped.

"Hey." Bucky replied back after he raised his head to quickly glance at you. Though he didn't stay, he climbed the stairs and you heard the bathroom door close. You sat on a chair around the table in the kitchen and held your head between your hands, this was a disaster. How were you going to fix this? You sighed deeply, you didn't even feel like eating breakfast, you had a knot in your stomach and your throat felt constricted anyway.

Still you got up and filled a glass of water that you drank, you needed this after all your crying. Since you would be leaving the cabin today you decided to clean a bit while Bucky was upstairs showering and packing his stuff. Even if Tony Stark probably had someone taking care of the cabin you weren't a pig and the least you could do was clean the house before leaving.

When Bucky came back downstairs he had taken his bags and yours and headed towards the entrance. You didn't expect him to do that, it made you a tiny bit happy but he still didn't talk to you. When he was done putting you both's stuff in the car trunk he came back in the house and stayed towards the door. The winter soldier said nothing but you knew he was waiting for you to leave.

"I-I cleaned after us, we can go." You spoke. You were so uncomfortable, you hated the tone of your voice, you felt like the insecure girl you were when you came at the tower on your first day to meet the Avengers. Bucky said nothing and it really made you sad. "Can... Can we please talk?" You asked.

"No." He replied. There was no need to insist, you walked past him and got out of the house as you felt you were about to cry again. You took a deep breath of fresh air and exhaled to calm yourself.

You were about to open the door on the passenger seat but you saw through the window that Bucky had put his bag on the seat. You rolled your eyes in frustration as you gave up and opened the door on the backseat. You climbed in the backseat and closed the door, if Bucky didn't want to speak at the moment, fine. You had four hours ahead of you where he would be stuck with you only in the car so you would try again later.

After he locked the door of the cabin he put the keys in his pocket and walked towards the car. You thought back on your first day with him here and how happy you both were, how could things go so badly in such a short amount of time?? A few hours ago you were literally telling to each other how much you loved the other one, tears blurred your vision again and you cried quietly as you turned your head towards the window so Bucky wouldn't see you. He climbed in the driver seat and despite not seeing you he could hear you sniffle. He sighed deeply before starting the car and driving out of the woods.

  
  


\---

  
  


During the ride you were inconsolable. Bucky's been driving for one hour now and he stayed silent the whole time. Sometimes he would take a glance at you through the rearview mirror when you accidentally let out a sob but he stayed focused on the road. You had no idea what to do, you didn't want to bother him while he was driving but you also couldn't let him keep thinking that you still felt something for Loki because it was not the case.

"I-I'm sorry." You finally decided to say. "I-I understand it must have felt awful when it happened and I also understand you're mad at me." You continued as you cried. "But I swear to you Bucky, I don't have any romantic feelings for Loki."

"Stop." Bucky spoke.

"No, I don't want you to think I do. It's you that I chose, It's you that I lov-"

"Stop! You don't get to say that." He said coldly.

"Y-You won't even let me say it?" You asked before breaking down in sobs in the backseat. Your heart stinged so much inside your chest, the pain was awful. You couldn't see it but Bucky was tearing up as well, it took him everything to keep a straight face as he heard you cry behind him. Suddenly he stopped the car on the side of the road and he got out. You saw him walk away a bit as you wiped your tears away with your hands. You didn't know if it was good idea to join him but fuck it, you needed fresh air too so you got out as well and walked towards him.

"Stay in the car." He ordered you without turning around, you were facing his back.

"Bucky, I'm sorry!" You yelled in frustration. "I-I have no idea what to do. I don't know why I said his name, I wasn't thinking of him that way."

"Maybe you did?" Bucky said coldly. "If I remember he used to kiss you in the neck as well so maybe you were hoping he was the one kissing you." His words hit you so brutally you didn't know how you were still standing on your legs. Suddenly everything turned black, it was the same painful and horrible sensation you felt when people mocked you. You couldn't believe Bucky really thought that.

"Y-You said you would never let someone hurt me ever again." You let out quietly and hurt, you were drained of all energy.

"And I think you were right, you don't deserve me." It was the final blow that ended you on your spot. You had no idea Bucky could be this cruel. Your eyes widened and then you raised your head to the sky as if you had just realized and proceeded what he said to you. Everything hurt. You were aching everywhere. You turned around and you didn't have time take two steps that you suddenly felt very sick, being on an empty stomach and all, you fell on the ground.

"Leave me alone." You said weakly when the winter soldier kneeled next to you and grabbed your arm to help you up.

"Let me help you to the car." He said but there was no warmth in his voice.

"Drive away, leave." You said as you cried.

"What?" He asked.

"Go!" You yelled.

"I'm not leaving you here. I may be mad at you but not enough to let you die. You're as white as a sheet."

"Why do you pretend that you care?! You made me understand very well that you can't stand me and don't love me anymore so why would you care if I died here?!"

"Get up and get in the car!" He yelled as well. The winter soldier's had enough so he grabbed you by the waist and threw you over his shoulder before walking to the car. You were too weak to fight back or yell so you did nothing. He dropped you on the backseat and laid you on it before securing you with the seatbelts. He closed the door of the backseat then climbed in the driver seat. "I'll stop at the next gas station to get you something to eat." He said as he started the car. Seeing the state you were in Bucky guessed you ate nothing this morning.

  
  


The winter soldier left you in the car while he went to the convenience store, you were too weak to stand up and honestly you didn't care about eating. You felt sick but it had nothing to do with your stomach, you were mad at yourself for what you did last night and you couldn't stop thinking about what Bucky said to you earlier.

 _You didn't deserve him_.

Maybe he was right. This was too good to be true. Being an Avengers, having friends, having a boyfriend. It was just too much it couldn't last or feel natural. All your life you had been miserable, maybe it was just your destiny. The sound of the car door opening brought you out of your dark thoughts though you didn't move, you didn't care.

"Here." Bucky said as he handed you a plastic bag. You didn't react so he just dropped it next to you and closed the door. If you didn't want to eat he wasn't going to force you.

"Do you hate me?" You asked quietly while he was driving. No answers. "Did-" You took a deep breath to calm down because you felt your tears coming back. "D-Did you mean it?" A tear rolled down your cheek. Bucky knew what you were asking. Once again, no answers.

"Eat." He said. You sighed before reaching for the bag he brought you. It contained a sandwich, a bottle water and- your eyes widened, a package of _cookies_.

"Didn't know you, out of all people, could mock me." You said with furrowed brows as you dropped the plastic bag next to his seat. You were disgusted.

"You should be happy, it will remind you of him." He spat at you as he kept eyeing the road.

"STOP! For the last time Buck, I don't love Loki!" You yelled in frustration. "I chose you! I stayed with you! You were my first!" You started sobbing again. "Does that mean nothing to you? Were you just throwing words when we said we loved each other? Because I wasn't! I meant every word I said to you!"

"Why did you say his name then?" You bit onto your lower lip. He was willing to listen to you this time but you had no idea what to say that would reassure him.

"I-I really don't know." You let out. "I was lost in my thoughts, you know I'm always overthinking. I was staring at the sky and I thought about how happy I was with you at the cabin and I thought of my friends at the tower and I pictured each of them in my head." You wiped your tears with your fingers. "I wondered if Thor had came back from his home, before leaving he told his his father was sick and naturally I-I thought of Loki as well..." Bucky let out a small chuckle that really worried you. "But it was nothing! He's king of Asgard and I just wondered if he was doing well, how can you hate me for it??" You said as you approached Bucky's seat. "When I chose you I broke his heart and I felt bad because he didn't deserve to suffer any more than he already had!"

"So you regret it-"

"You're not listening to me, Bucky!" You said louder. "Choosing you is the one thing I'm 100% sure I'll never regret! What I regret is that I had to hurt someone who was nothing but kind to me and you know, because I told you, there are not a lot of people out there who were nice to me!" You breathed deeply to calm down, you were yelling and it wasn't helping anybody. "I-I don't know what happened in my brain for me to say his name out loud but Bucky, I know deep down that it's you that I love, not him."

"I think you and I both need time to think about our feelings." The winter soldier let out.

"You don't believe me?" You asked.

"I think you're confused about your feelings."

"Why are you so stubborn, I'm telling you that I love-"

"No. Stop talking." Bucky interrupted you. You backed up in your seat and turned your head to the window, you cried quietly as you watched the scenery.

 


	42. Here We Go Again

You eventually fell asleep during the ride, Bucky said no more words to you and you were too weak and tired to start an argument again so you slept.

The winter soldier kept a good figure and pretended he was okay but he was **not**. He had never felt this crappier before and all he wanted was to go back in time. Damn, he even wished he hadn't heard you say Loki's name.

Bucky was lost and confused. Yes, he meant every single word he said to you while you were at the cabin. That he loved you, that he would do anything for you and that you were a perfect girlfriend for him. But it all got erased in that one second where he realized you had moaned a name that wasn't his.

He didn't know what to think anymore. He listened to you but your explanations made no sense to him. Bucky let out a low and quiet chuckle when he thought that if the roles were inversed you would give him hell and it was true. So he thought you had no right to be angry or frustrated with him. You're the one who were in the wrong this time. And when Bucky was hurt he got mean.

He glanced at your sleeping form through the rearview mirror as he drove, he hoped he'd be in the tower in no time, for now he just wanted to be left alone and away from you. What happened really hurt him and Bucky had no idea on which foot to stand anymore.

  
  


Two hours later you woke up from your little nap, you glanced outside as you heard klaxons, your brows furrowed when you saw that you were stuck in traffic. It was almost 11am so of course it would be busy at the moment. At least you were closer to your destination now. You sighed before leaning forward to reach the plastic bag you left on the passenger seat earlier. You grabbed the water bottle and backed up on your seat.

"You're not gonna eat?" Bucky spoke to you and you let out a little gasp, not expecting it.

"No." You replied.

"You had nothing all day."

"Why do you care? You made it very clear it's not your problem anymore."

"I'm the one who went to buy it for you."

"What is your goal, Bucky?" You asked. "Are you mad at me or not?"

"I know your problem with... food." He said.

"You know all my problems, it didn't stop you from saying what you said." You took a deep breath before throwing the water bottle back in the front, you didn't want to drink anymore.

"Are you gonna starve yourself now?" You crossed your arms on your chest and looked by the window.

"Don't worry, I'm used to it." You spat.

"You got no room to be mad at the mom-"

"I'm mad at me, okay?!" You cried. "I hate myself for ruining the only good thing I ever had in my life!" You yelled as tears rolled down your cheeks. "You were right that I was right, I don't deserve you and once we arrive at the tower I'll pack my bags and you'll never see me again! There's plenty of people who need my power so at least I'll try to make myself useful a little bit because it's the only thing I'm good at. I'll ask Fury to transfer me elsew-"

"Are you done?" Bucky asked. "You're not moving elsewhere."

"Why do you pretend to care?!"

"Because I do! I still love you!" Your eyes widened as you went quiet. Bucky let out a long sigh after his revelation.

"T-Then what's keeping us from going back to what we were?" You asked quietly.

"You." He replied. "I don't believe your feelings for me are as deep as we both thought they were. I think you still love him."

"I never loved Loki!" You said, a bit baffled honestly.

"Yet, you said his name." You threw your hands up in the air in frustration before bringing them back to your thighs.

"What can I do for you to forgive me??" You asked desperately.

"I need time." The winter soldier simply replied.

"And I-I need you, okay?" You lips trembled as you fought your tears back. "Everything hurts since yesterday, I can't eat because I have a knot in my stomach and my throat feels constricted. All-" You breathed deeply. "All I need is you." You let out.

You faced forward as the winter soldier started driving a little bit faster, you were finally out of the traffic and only a few miles away from the tower. You and Bucky stayed silent for the remaining of the time on the road.

  
  


\---

  
  


When you arrived in the parking lot and got out of the car Bucky helped you with your bag in the elevator but he didn't ride it with you. He took his own bag in his hand and went to take the stairs. It made you really sad. You held your tears back until you reached your floor and walked down the hallway. You entered your room and then broke down in tears on your bed.

The winter soldier climbed the stairs and when he heard voices in the hallway of the dining room he decided to greet the people inside and warn them of his and your arrival. He dropped his bag next to the door before entering.

"Hey." Bucky announced himself.

"Bucky?" Steve raised his head, his brows furrowed in confusion.

"What are you doing here? We didn't expect you until like... tomorrow or the day after." Nat said. The winter soldier went around the room and salutated everyone then he saw the God of thunder and he froze in his spot before ignoring it. Thor had nothing to do with his and your argument so he greeted him as well.

"We... I decided to return earlier than planned." He said. After all it was indeed his decision, not yours.

"Where's [Y/N]? Is she wounded, is that why you came early?" Steve asked.

"Don't know, her room probably." He shrugged.

"What do you mean you don't know?" Tony asked.

"She's okay, right?" Bruce asked.

"She's not wounded if that's what you're asking." Bucky said as he dropped himself on a chair. The Avengers were currently having lunch.

"You're acting weird, just tell us what happened." Tony said.

"You guys did not have a fight again, did you?" Nat asked. Bucky rolled his eyes and they all understood. "Alright, what happened?"

"Don't really wanna talk about it right now." He said. "I just came to warn you that we're back. I'm gonna go rest in my room." The winter soldier got up and exited the dining room.

"Here we go again." Nat said to Steve.

"I'll talk to him later." Steve said.

"Yeah, I'll go see [Y/N]." She replied.

"Well, that's too bad." Bruce commentated. "I remember how happy they were before leaving."

"Wait, he didn't tell us how the mission went." Tony said.

"You think they fought over the mission?" Steve asked.

"Well the mission rested on her shoulders, maybe he pressured her and they fought over that." Tony explained.

"Why are you blaming this on him? We don't know what happened." Steve defended Bucky.

"Well, she was pretty anxious with me during the week when we separated the both of them. The poor girl needed vacation that's why I gave Bucky the keys of the house."

"Well, we won't know until they talk to us." Nat said. "I'll go check on her now, I'm done." She said as she cleaned after herself before exiting the room.

  
  


You heard a knock on your door and for a second you thought it was Bucky but it wouldn't be possible. He made it clear he needed space and to be left alone without you around so it'd make no sense for him to check on you.

"I'm coming." You said to whoever was behind the door. You wiped your tears and took a deep breath before opening it.

"Hey!" Nat greeted you with a bright smile. You tried to smile back at her but she noticed something was wrong. You let her enter your room and closed the door behind her. "We saw Bucky at the dining room. We... uh, quickly understood something was wrong. Though he didn't say anything."

"I-I ruined everything." You let out in a high pitched voice before breaking down in tears in front of her.

"Oh no, what happened?" She asked as she took you in her arms for a hug. You sobbed against her shoulder as you wrapped your arms around her. "Come, tell me what happened." Nat invited you to sit on your bed, she handed you a box of tissues that was resting on your nightstand. "Let's start from the beginning, when did it happen?" You took a deep breath to calm down before speaking.

"Yesterday night..." You replied as you wiped your tears with a tissue.

"Alright. So the first three days went well, right?" You nodded.

"It was... magical? I- there's no words. I was the happiest." You replied before two fat tears rolled down your cheeks.

"Okay. What happened yesterday night?" Nat asked as she patted your back gently.

"B-Bucky, he-" You bit onto your lower lip to stop it from trembling.

"It's okay, take your time." She comforted you.

"He invited me outside at night, he had prepared some blankets on the grass and a few candles... I-It was beautiful..." You said as you cried. "B-Bucky was really perfect during those few days. A-Anyway... He wanted us to look at the stars, y-you know it was very romantic..." Nat smiled a bit as you told her your story.

"It sounds adorable." She said. "So, what went down?"

"I ruined everything. H-He started... you know, hugging and kissing me while I was lost in my thoughts staring at the sky... And-" Your body shaked with sobs. "I said his name." You cried.

"Bucky?" She asked and you shaked your head.

"L-Loki..." Her eyes widened.

"You what??" She asked.

"I-I know it sounds really really bad but like I tried to explain to him I-I was lost in my thoughts! I-I didn't mean it that way, I wasn't even thinking of him that way!" You panicked.

"Okay, first of all calm down." Nat said to you. "What made you say his name?"

"I don't know... While I was staring at the sky I thought of the tower and you guys and I-I wondered if Thor had came back and eventually my thoughts drifted towards Loki... But I swear I was just thinking if he was doing well on his planet. I wasn't like imagining or hoping he was the one kissing me. Bucky kissed my neck at the moment I was thinking of Loki, I'm sure that if I was thinking of you at that moment maybe it's your name that I would've let out." You explained.

"Well, you would've been in less much trouble." She joked to ease the mood. "Though I did kiss you as well."

"Nat, how am I going to fix this? Bucky doesn't want to talk to me or see me." You said as you wiped your tears.

"I'm gonna tell you the exact same thing I told him when he was the one trying to fix something wrong that he did." She smiled at you. "He will come back."

"How can you be so sure?" You asked. "Y-You know he... I did try to talk to him and-" You breathed deeply. "It was a disaster."

"That's because he was mad at the moment, he said stuff he didn't mean." She reassured you.

"Y-Yesterday night Bucky raised his voice at me for the first time and he glared at me..." You said as you cried. "It was terrifying." You continued. "But earlier, because we fought in the car too, at a moment he stopped the car and got out because it was too much... I followed him because I really needed him to understand that I don't care about Loki and he-" Your shoulders shaked again. "Bucky said I didn't deserve him."

"I'm sure he didn't mean it. You know he gets mean when he's upset, he just said whatever to hurt you. I'm not saying it's okay but just saying you shouldn't consider those words." She explained to you.

"I miss him so much, everything hurts." You let out as you closed your eyes and cried more. Nat took you in her arms again.

"It's going to be fine, just let some time pass. Remember when you were mad at him? You needed time as well and eventually you two got together." She caressed your back. "Steve is going to talk to him later to check how he's feeling but you know he and I got you both's back."

"Thanks." You said to her. "I really missed you guys."

"You two really can't be left together." She chuckled lowly. "Okay-" She said as she got up. "I'll leave you rest, I'm gonna talk with Steve." Nat grabbed the doorknob and left your room.

The redhaired woman took the elevator to head back to the kitchen and there she found Steve alone cleaning up.

"Hey." The captain said to her when he saw her enter the room. "Were you with [Y/N]?"

"Yes." She replied with a sigh. "It's... bad."

"Was it Bucky's fault like Tony suggested earlier?"

"No, it was her this time. Though I'll let him explain it to you."

"I'm almost done here, I'll go see Bucky after. You wanna come with me?" Steve asked.

"Sure. I need to hear his side of the story anyway."

"Alright, I'm done. Let's go." They both left the kitchen and took the elevator to go to Bucky's room.

  
  


\---

  
  


"I was wondering why you two didn't show up yet." Bucky said after he opened the door to Steve and Nat. He moved out of the way and let them in. "Be my guests."

"So, what happened?" Steve asked.

"I already know because I talked with [Y/N] earlier but Steve doesn't." Nat said to the winter soldier. Bucky dropped on the seat in front of the desk while Nat and Steve sat on the edge of his bed.

"Well..." He took a deep breath before starting to tell the story. "I decided to come back earlier because I got mad at her for something she did."

"Wha- What did she do?" Steve asked as glanced at Nat before looking at Bucky.

"I was- We were cuddling and I started kissing her neck, I noticed she's really into it since the game you know-" Bucky smiled slightly but quickly changed to a neutral expression. "Anyway, making her feel good and all and... She said Loki's name." Steve's eyes widened.

"What??"

"Yeah, I had the same reaction." Nat said.

"But I thought she didn't love him, she chose you." Steve added. Bucky raised his arm towards Steve as if to say finally someone understands.

"Okay so she told me the same thing but she added she doesn't love Loki, she doesn't know why she said his name." Nat said.

"Yeah, well, it makes no sense. She's still in love with him, that's the only explanation." Bucky said.

"I asked her why she said his name and she told me that while she was staring at the sky, she started overthinking about the tower, us, Thor who was gone on Asgard and eventually she started thinking about Loki as well but she swore to me she wasn't thinking of him kissing her or something like that. She was certain that if she was thinking of someone else it's their name that she would've said. Unfortunately it just landed on Loki."

"Steve, help me out here. Do you buy this?" Bucky asked his best friend.

"W-Well, uh..." Steve started before crossing his arms on his chest. "It could be possible. I agree that the fact that it was Loki's name is the worst thing that could've happened but..."

"Would you be as angry if she said someone else's name? Someone who wasn't after her like Loki was during the same time as you? What if she said Bruce's name?" Nat asked Bucky.

"I have no idea and honestly I don't care, all I know is that it's Loki's name that she said at that moment and since she hesitated between the two of us not too long ago my theory is that she still haven't made up her mind." Bucky explained.

"Oh c'mon, you know that's not true. It's you that she chose, not him." Nat told him.

"That's true, I think if she wanted to choose Loki she would've done it. She was really mad at you after the kiss thing... and the punching." Steve added.

"Maybe she regrets choosing me, she had me and now she wants him." He sighed.

"Stop Bucky. When I saw her she was a mess, she wouldn't stop crying. She told me the first days with you were magical and she really wishes she hadn't done what she did." Nat said as she got up. "She also told me about the mean things you said to her, you can't do that everytime you're mad, especially to someone like her... You know she will never forget it. I felt really bad for her."

"Wh- I'm the bad guy now?" The winter soldier rolled his eyes.

"Did you mean what you said?" She asked him.

"What... did you say?" The captain dared to ask. Bucky crossed eyes with Steve but didn't reply.

"That she didn't deserve him." Nat revealed and Steve's eyes widened but he didn't comment. "So, did you mean it?" She asked him again.

"… No" Bucky finally let out.

"Good. You're lucky I took some advances already and told her you said that because you were mad and you didn't mean it."

"Do you still love her?" Steve asked.

"You can't really un-love someone under 24 hours, can you?" Bucky replied.

"Are you going to forgive her?" Nat asked.

"I don't know, I need time. I'm still convinced she loves Loki." He replied.

"Funny how much you both sound so similar." Nat smiled. "I know what you need? You just want to be reassured like she did when she was mad at you." She walked towards the door. "Fine, we'll leave you some time but I think it's stupid and unnecessary since I know you both are gonna fall back into each other's arms. Come on, Steve. We're done here."

 


	43. It's Called Comforting

You stayed in your room the whole day, you didn't want to face the others and have to explain to them as well what happened between you and the winter soldier. To be honest you kinda hoped Nat would just gossip about it with everybody. Not that she will do it in a mean way but just so you won't have to do it yourself. Before going to bed you took your phone and sent a message to Bucky saying that you missed him but he never replied. After crying for some time sleep finally consumed you.

You woke up later than usual, you didn't want to join everyone for breakfast because you didn't want to break down in tears at the sight of Bucky. You would just ruin everyone's day so instead you stayed in bed until 10am then you finally went downstairs. The hallway was empty thankfully but as you approached the kitchen you heard some noises and so you started to hesitate if it was a good idea to enter. You wondered who was there, it was kinda late for breakfast. Then you rememberd someone in this tower actually always has a late breakfast.

"Thor?" You asked in confusion as you entered the kitchen.

"Hey, [Y/N]!" The God of thunder greeted you with a bright smile, he got up from his chair and took you in his strong arms.

"Did you just arrive from Asgard?" You asked.

"No, I came back two days ago." He released you and went back to his chair.

"Oh, I'm sorry. If I knew you were here I would've said hi yesterday." You said.

"It's fine. How are you doing?" He asked. You sighed.

"N-Not that great to be honest with you..." You replied in a quiet voice before grabbing a chair and sitting next to him.

"I'm sorry, I heard about your argument with Bucky... Not the details though." Thor said.

"I-It's just really embarrassing... For me, not for Bucky." You said.

"Do you want to tell me what happened?" He asked.

"I-I..." You took a deep breath. "Me and Bucky were spending time together, he took me outside to look at the starry night, it was very beautiful." You said with a sad little smile as you looked down. "And then I started thinking about how I missed everyone here and I thought about you as well-" You said as you glanced at him and Thor smiled at you. "I was wondering if you were back at the tower and then I thought about Loki too, I was hoping he was doing okay... But then Bucky kissed me while I was lost in my thoughts and-" You bit onto your lower lip and fought your tears back. "He kissed my neck and made me feel good but I said... Loki's name." You let out.

"You said my brother's name... as in pleasure?" Thor asked and you started blushing.

"T-Thor! D-Don't say it like that..." The God of thunder started laughing next to you but instead of feeling mocked you smiled slightly. "C'mon, stop laughing it's not funny." You said.

"I'm sorry, I promise I'm not mocking you." He said.

"I know." You said.

"It's just- If Loki knew about this he would be thrilled."

"You can never tell him that, Thor!" You let out a bit panicked. "Stop laughing, tell me instead how are things on Asgard." You said. He cheered you up a little and you really needed this.

"It's okay. My father is still ill but Loki is ruling and he's doing well, along with my mother and my friends."

"I'm glad." You said. "And my proposition still stands, if I can be of any help to your family please let me know." You said to the God of thunder.

"I know, you're very kind [Y/N]." Thor said as he gently took your hand in his. "I want you to know you can also count on me if you need my help." He smiled at you. "Because we are friends and because someone made me swear to look after you and protect you since he couldn't at the moment." Your eyes widened and tears started blurring your vision.

"H-He made you swear it?" You asked in astonishment, air had been knocked out of your lungs. "Please tell me the truth, how-" You breathed deeply to calm down to not break down in tears. "How is Loki doing?"

"You don't have to worry about him, [Y/N]. He's very busy with the realm so he doesn't have time to be bored and think about you. I think it's better for my brother." You nodded.

"Please promise to me something as well. If something happens to Loki you will tell me about it. I don't care if it's battle wounds, illness or anything... Just promise me you will tell me about it and if I ask you to take me to him you will." Thor sighed as he looked at you.

"Fine, I promise you [Y/N]." You squeezed the God of thunder's hand in yours.

"Thank you." You said with relief. "I-I care very much about the two of you, you have been nothing but kind to me and I feel like I will never be able to thank you enough. It's important to me to pay you back both one day."

"You don't have to pay back your friends when they do something nice for you, [Y/N]." Thor smiled. "It's what friends are for."

"Friends also support and help each other." You smiled back. "Thank you..." You said after you both went silent for a short moment.

"For what?" He asked.

"Talking with you... It cheered me up." You said with a little smile.

At that moment someone entered the kitchen and when you raised your head to check who you froze on your spot. Thor sensed you flinch at the sight of the winter soldier entering the room but he said nothing. When Bucky's gaze stopped at the table where you and the God of thunder's hands held you immediately brought it back to yourself and lowered your head in shame. You were doing nothing wrong so why did you feel so bad?

He grabbed a water bottle in the fridge and left the room without saying anything. You had figured he was training because of his clothes.

"Are you okay?" Thor asked you after Bucky left the kitchen. You shaked your head and then you started crying. "It's gonna be alright." He said as he turned his chair and opened his arms for a hug. You approached Thor and hugged him as tears streamed down your cheeks.

"H-He didn't even say hi..." You said after you released the God of thunder and wiped your tears away with your fingers.

"I'll talk to him." Thor said before getting up.

"No! I-I appreciate but I don't want to make things worse. I-It's fine..." You said. "I forgot to give the mission report to Tony, I'm gonna go bring it to him." You got up as well. "T-Thanks for talking with me, I missed your presence while you were away." You smiled a bit sadly at him before stepping out of the kitchen.

  
  


\---

  
  


On your way to Tony's lab you didn't run into Bucky and you didn't know if you were happy about it or not. It really stung you the way he just ignored you in the kitchen. You also hoped he didn't think anything bad of you and Thor holding hands in comfort, it meant nothing. With the text you sent him last night, even if he didn't reply to it, you thought the winter soldier would at least act in a non hostile way with you.

You stepped out of the elevator to join the lab, you had previously taken the document that was in your room. You approached the glass door and knocked on it. Tony and Bruce both raised their heads and after seeing you they smiled in a friendly way and it warmed your heart.

"Hey..." You said quietly after you walked in.

"Welcome back." Bruce greeted you as he approached you and put a hand on your shoulder but you took him in your arms which surprised him a bit at first but he hugged you back anyway.

"Hey, sweetheart." Tony opened his arms for you as well.

"I-I'm really sorry I didn't say hi yesterday. I-I just-"

"It's okay. We heard." Tony stopped you after he released you.

"I just feel really shitty." You let out as you leaned against one of the machines in the lab.

"That's the report?" Tony asked you as he eyed the document in your hand.

"Oh yeah, sorry." You handed it to him. "You can give it to Fury." Bruce rolled a chair towards you so you could sit on it. "Thank you." You thanked him before sitting.

"Why don't you tell us what happened?" Tony asked.

"Nat already told us a part of the story though." Bruce said.

"Really? I saw Thor earlier and he didn't know the details."

"We didn't talk about it over dinner since Bucky was there too and it would've been awkward. She was at the lab." The doctor explained to you.

"Oh, okay. Well I'm glad she did so I don't have to tell the whole thing again." You sighed.

"So, uh... Do you love Loki?" Tony asked.

"No and I never did. I-I..." You passed a hand on your face. "I have no idea why I said his name, I was confused. It happens you know?" You explained. "You know like sometimes your brain just freezes and you say something random? It's what happened."

"You don't think that deep inside of you you were wishing you were with Loki?" Bruce asked.

"That's one thing I'm 100% sure of. I love Bucky and the first days were great. I was really happy." You said to them. "And Tony, the house was so lovely. Thank you." You said to him and he smiled at you.

"Well, you know. I believe you." Tony said to you. "I mean if you were really in love with Loki nothing could've stopped you from being with him. Hell you even went against all of us to spend time with him." You let out a little giggle.

"Well, at least someone believes me." You said and your expression quickly changed from joyous to sad. "I-I don't know what to do, Bucky doesn't believe me and he thinks I love Loki." You said as you lowered your head.

"Just give it some time, [Y/N]." Bruce said to you. "You understand Bucky was hurt by what happened, right?" You nodded. "Give him time to process it and eventually forget so he can forgive you."

"I-I know I'm being selfish but it's just... Everything hurts without him." You said with teary eyes.

"Hold on, it's gonna get better soon." Tony said as he approached you and put a reassuring hand on your shoulder. "You know, you and him are pretty similar?"

"How so?" You asked.

"Your first days in here, you were so quiet, you barely made eye contact with us, you were very shy... Reminded me of him living here in his first days." You smiled slightly.

"Nat said that too... That we are similar."

"You guys are soulmates." Bruce said. You wiped a tear off your cheek.

"I just hope he forgives me soon." You said as you glanced at your feet.

"He will, okay?" You raised your head and forced yourself to smile at Tony and Bruce.

"How about you both tell me what I missed while we were away?" You asked them to change subjects.

  
  


\---

  
  


You stayed with Tony and Bruce at the lab until it was lunchtime and then the three of you headed to the dining room. You were nervous in the elevator, you didn't know if it was a good idea to be in the same room as Bucky. You didn't know if you would be able to handle it.

"L-Listen, I-I'm not that hungry..." You lied to the two men in the hallway. Tony sighed.

"You're nervous about seeing him but it's fine." He reassured you.

"And we're all here, it's not like you're alone with him." Bruce added. You raised your eyes to the sky in resignation.

"Fine..." You gave up. You were between the two of them when you finally stepped inside the kitchen. Of course, the others were already there.

"Hey, what are the three of you doing together?" Nat asked

"We were in the lab. [Y/N] told us about the mission." Bruce said.

"[Y/N], it's good to see you back." Steve got up and took you in his arms as he smiled.

"I'm glad to see you as well." You replied as you embraced him. "Sorry for... avoiding you all yesterday." You said quietly so only the captain could hear. Bucky and Thor were sitting around the table as well. The God of thunder smiled at you when you crossed eyes with him and... the winter soldier ignored you. He didn't even raise his head.

"It's fine, I understand." Steve whispered to you before releasing you and pulling a chair for you to sit next to him.

"And where were y'all?" Tony asked.

"Steve, Bucky and I were training." Nat replied.

You were looking down in front of you while they were talking and filling their plates. You felt bad and uncomfortable, nothing felt natural, you had no idea how to act. People shifted around you but you were lost in your own head thinking of the mistakes you've done and having no plans on how to fix them. Suddenly you felt someone poke at your shoulder.

"[Y/N]?" You raised your head as you got out of your thoughts and stared at Steve's face in confusion.

"I'm sorry, did you say something?" You asked.

"I asked you if you wanted me to fill your plate, you didn't touch it." You looked at your empty plate then at everyone around you. They were all served and digging into their foods already.

"Uh, yeah sure..." You replied quietly. You could not allow yourself to cry here, you didn't want to make it more awkward than it already was for everyone else.

"Here you go." Steve said after he put your plate back in front of you.

"Thank you." You said. You breathed deeply to calm your emotions, you could feel it, you were on the verge of tears. You just hoped no one would talk to you in the next five minutes.

"It's been a long time since we all ate together, huh?" Steve said to ease the mood. It was awfully silent.

"Yeah, I missed this." Bruce added.

"What do guys say we do something tonight? Just like the old times?" Tony suggested.

"Ooh, I like where this is going." Nat said. "What do you propose?" She asked Tony.

"How about bowling?"

"Oh, nice. I love bowling." Steve said. "I'm in."

"Me too." Nat said and Bruce and Thor nodded as well. "How about you, [Y/N]?" You raised your head at the mention of your name. Your heard the conversation but the only thing on your mind was Bucky.

"I-I don't know-" You said as you rubbed your arm awkwardly. "I never did that-" You had just finished your sentence and suddenly your eyes widened when you heard a low chuckle come from the winter soldier. Your brows furrowed, you were confused. Was it what you said or did he laugh about something else? You looked at him but he kept his head low. You felt so humiliated, why would Bucky do that? Your heart started to sting and you were so frustrated you wanted to cry but not here, not in front of everybody and absolutely not in front of Bucky. You didn't want to give him any satisfaction. "I'm sorry, I'm not hungry and I don't wanna go out." You excused yourself before walking out of the kitchen.

You started sobbing in the hallway, you prefered to take the stairs instead of waiting for the elevator and risk someone coming after you. You just wanted to lock yourself in your room and cry.

"Hey!" Nat said to Bucky after she hit him with her arm on his torso. "Why did you do that?"

"Do what?" He asked as he rolled his eyes.

"Were you making fun of her?" She asked.

"If you were, that was rude." Thor said to Bucky.

"Mind your business." He spat at him.

"She's my friend, I won't allow you to disrespect her." The God of thunder defended you.

"A friend? Are you sure? You seemed pretty close earlier in the kitchen." The winter soldier mocked.

"I was comforting her because she was crying because of you." He explained.

"Wai- What happened?" Tony asked.

"[Y/N] joined me for breakfast and she was sad so I comforted her." Thor explained.

"Why were you holding hands with my girl then?" Bucky asked.

"It's called comforting." Thor added.

"Seemed like flirting to me. Maybe after Loki, it's you she's after. If we don't stop her she might as well go after all the men in her-"

_**Smack!** _

"What's wrong with you?!" Nat raised her voice at Bucky after slapping him across the face. The winter soldier got up immediately, his chair got knocked over then he stepped out of the kitchen, leaving everyone in the room shocked.

 


	44. Crisis

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't expect you all to really like the last chapter, I'm glad. Thank you for your comments <3

"No one talks about what happened in here to [Y/N], understood?" Nat said to the Avengers in the room. "We know he didn't mean any of it, he was just jealous and angry."

"I don't recognize him." Steve said.

"You know he gets mean when he's hurt." Nat said.

"Well, I'm gonna pretend I wasn't in here during the last 10 minutes." Tony sighed deeply.

"I'm gonna talk to Buck." Steve said before getting up.

"You shouldn't... right now." Bruce stopped him. "Let him calm down a bit first."

"I want to check on [Y/N] as well but I'm not sure I'm the most appropriate person." Thor said.

"You know what, we'll see them later. And hopefully everyone will be calm before tonight for the bowling, alright?" Nat said.

"Yeah, it's not the first big argument in this tower." Steve said. "And I think we're all gonna make it worse if we keep meddling between the two of them."

"I agree." Tony said.

"They're adults and they should solve it between them. But they know we're here for support if they need us." Bruce said.

"Alright, let's do that." Nat concluded.

  
  


While the Avengers talked about the big drama that exploded in the kitchen, you had retreated to your room and you were currently crying on your bed... _Again_. You felt humiliated and mocked, you were pretty sure Bucky was laughing at you. You thought he must've catched sight of your teary eyed face and it made him laugh to see you hurt and miserable. You would've never thought he was capable of such cruelty.

You felt like crap and you just wanted to get out of the tower. If things weren't going to get better with Bucky you would ask Fury to relocate you somewhere else. You could barely handle Bucky ignoring you but if he started making fun of you now it would be too much. You just didn't have the strength to take it.

**Knock, knock!**

You raised your head from your wet pillow in surprise. Who could that be? You wiped your tears as you got up to open the door. You thought it was probably Natasha checking on you after you left the kitchen. You opened the door and you froze on your spot.

"I don't want to see you." You said to the winter soldier before closing the door on his face but he quickly had time to shove his shoe between the door to keep it open.

"Why did you leave the kitchen?" Bucky asked as he forced his way into your room. You rolled your eyes as you turned around and gave him your back. You couldn't believe he just asked that.

"How dare you ask me that?" You asked. "You were laughing and mocking me while I was sad and on the verge of tears. You must be so thrilled seeing me weak and pathetic." You spat as more tears rolled down your cheeks.

"What?" He asked confused. "I didn't laugh for these reasons, what the hell??"

"Then why were you laughing?!" You asked loudly as you turned around to face him. Seeing you crying right now in front of him made his heart sting. Yes, he was mad at you and didn't believe in your explanations but you were still his girl and a part of Bucky hated himself for making you like this.

"You said you never went bowling." He let out.

"And?" You asked.

"You don't remember? We laughed when I pointed to you that everytime we ask you to do something you'd reply you've never done it before or it was your first time." Bucky explained. "When you said you never went bowling I rememberd instantly and I-I accidentally let out that chuckle." Your eyes widened as you stopped crying. Yeah, you rememberd that conversation now. It was when he made you ride with him on the motorcycle.

"I remember **you** laughing." You let out as you wiped your tears away. Bucky smiled slightly. "So... You weren't laughing because I was sad?" You asked timidly after you calmed down a bit.

"No." He replied as he looked at you. You bit onto your lower lip as you went to sit on the edge of your bed.

"B-Bucky, I'm... I'm tired and I-I miss you." You let out and then you lowered your head as tears re appeard in the corner of your eyes.

"I don't want you to be sad." He said. You exhaled deeply to not cry furthermore.

"Then be with me! Please..." You raised your head to look into his eyes but you noticed something strange on his face. "What's that?" You asked as you got up, you were reaching for his cheek with your hand but he took a step back. You brought your hand back to yourself.

"Nothing." Bucky replied. "It happened during training, I deserved it." He explained. You were pretty sure that red mark on his cheek wasn't there during lunch but you could be wrong, maybe you just didn't pay attention.

"Bucky, I love you." You said quietly.

"I can't. When I look at you I see him, when you used to hang out with him and laugh and smile at him." The winter soldier admitted. "I came to check on you because I don't want you to starve yourself not for us to get back together."

"Y-You're breaking up with me?" You asked as you cried.

"I told you, I need time." He said as he grabbed the doorknob. "Go back to the kitchen and finish your lunch." Bucky said before leaving your room. You dropped on your bed and sobbed once again.

  
  


\---

  
  


"You wanna tell me what happened in the kitchen earlier?" Steve asked his best friend. They were both back in the training room.

"What, you never lost your cool before?" Bucky brushed off.

"I know you were angry and you didn't mean what you said, I'm asking why it took such proportions." Steve explained.

"Because despite everything I love her, okay? I'm obsessed with my do- with [Y/N] and I wish our path never met Loki's." He said. "I suffered like hell when I had to watch them do things together, I knew that when she wasn't with me she was with him and when he finally left I thought I was free. At long last we would be happy together without anybody between us and right when I thought I was _safe_ he makes his way back between us. He's so talented he didn't even need to be there."

"I understand." The captain said.

"And then this morning I see her holding hands with Thor, something snapped inside of me. Maybe it's because he's his brother that I lashed out on him but I had to let it out." Bucky explained.

"But you know that they're just friends, right?" Steve asked but the winter soldier remained silent. "Bucky?"

"Yeah, yeah. I know." The captain smiled slightly.

"You know it deep down but I think you're just jealous and you don't want any other guy touching her." Bucky raised his head to look at his best friend.

"And that's a crime?" He admitted.

"Of course not, a little jealousy isn't bad but a lot can be troublesome." Steve sighed before smirking. "It's like Nat said. You actually just want her to show you she cares about you as much as you care about her. You want her to prove to you she loves you."

"What I want is time." Bucky replied.

"Be careful though, you never know when you might get separated. Take that advice from someone who experienced it." The captain raised one eyebrow. "I'm done here. I'm gonna take a shower and rest before we go bowling." He put a hand on Bucky's shoulder then left the training room. The winter soldier stared at the punching bag he was hitting before his talk with Steve, he decided to continue to train a little more before leaving.

  
  


During that time you were in the living space sitting one of the couches by yourself. You felt constricted in your room and you needed a bigger place to chill at, the living space was perfect for that. You were holding the pendant of your necklace in your hand and you stared at it before opening it and looking at the picture of Bucky inside.

You wanted to cry again, you felt so depressed. You missed him smiling at you, making jokes, touching you, even his teasing you missed but most of all you missed his sweet words for you. Bucky was the only person who made you feel so so loved and you felt beautiful in his eyes. Without him you were the insecure girl who first stepped inside this tower. So naturally tears started streaming down your face as you looked at his smile in the photo.

"There you are." Nat announced as she walked in the living space. You straightened yourself on your seat and quickly wiped your tears. "I passed by your room but you weren't there."

"Yeah." You sniffled quietly. "I was here. It felt stuffed in my bedroom."

"You've been here all afternoon?" She asked. You shrugged.

"What else am I supposed to do? I don't feel like doing anything." You replied as you stared at your pendant. The redhaired woman came closer and sat next to you.

"You should've come to me." She smiled.

"Don't wanna bother..." You replied. "I know this is already awkward as hell for everyone."

"Hey, you're not a burden or anything. We're your friends." She reassured you. "What were you doing? I mean besides crying." You turned your head to look at her. "You can't hide it, your eyes are all puffy." You rolled your eyes. Nat took your pendant between her fingers and looked at the picture inside. "Oh c'mon, enough." She closed it and then handed you her hand. "Come, I'll help you prepare for bowling."

"I don't wanna go." You replied.

"We're all going so you are too, we're not leaving you alone in the tower."

"It's fine, I'll sleep and hopefully forever." Nat's eyes widened.

"Stop, you don't mean that! Never say it again." You lowered your head before you started crying again.

"I'm tired, Nat! I miss him-" Your shoulder shaked as you sobbed. "H-He came into my room earlier..." She sighed deeply as she put her arm around your shoulder.

"What did he say this time?" She asked.

"I-It started well, he said he came to check on me because I left the kitchen without eating but-" You breathed deeply. "I asked him to take me back and he said he couldn't because when he sees me he sees Loki..." Nat let out a long sigh.

"You know, I understand you but I understand him as well. You didn't see how Bucky was when you used to spend time with Loki. He was, well- in the state you're in right now."

"What are you saying, that I deserve to suffer?" You asked.

"Of course not, let me finish."

"Sorry..." You said.

"When you said Loki's name when you were with Bucky you opened his deepest wounds and I'm afraid you can't heal those with your powers." She explained to you. "He was doing okay because you chose him and Loki left and then you both got together but it all came back to him during that one second when you said his name." You sighed.

"I understand... But what can I do? To fix it I mean."

"Bucky needs time but something he needs more is to be reassured. You need to prove to him that you love him. Words are great and they can be powerful but sometimes taking action is better. Show to Bucky that he's the one that you chose and prove to him how much you really love him." You breathed deeply. "You think you can do that?" She asked with a little smile.

"I'll do everything." You replied with determination.

"Good. Now come with me to your room, you need to wash your face and change before we meet with everyone else." You grabbed her hand and got up from the couch.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Everyone here?" Tony asked after you stepped out of the elevator with Nat. She helped you go through your wardrobe to pick a nice outfit for bowling night. You didn't feel like skirts and dresses so she made you wear a high waisted black skinny jeans with a crop top. That way your stomach wasn't showing too much unless you lifted your arms and the pants made your butt look great.

"You both look great." Steve complimented you and Nat.

"Thank you." You smiled slightly.

"Alright, split up in two groups since we're taking two cars." Tony said. Bruce and Thor went in Tony's car and Nat and Bucky went in Steve's. You sighed deeply as you made your decision. You were stuck between having to prove your love to Bucky but also giving him space and finally the latter won. You climbed in Tony's car to let the winter soldier breathe and you also couldn't risk having another fight with him in front of Nat and Steve.

"Here." Thor handed you his hand and helped you get in the backseat next to him.

"Thanks." You said as you closed the car door.

"Let's go." Tony said.

"Why are you sighing? You asked for space, she's giving you some." Nat said to Bucky. The winter soldier was annoyed, he didn't want you to get closer to the God of thunder more than you two already were.

"This is the separation I was talking about." Steve said to his best friend before he started the car.

"Are you both done?" He asked them.

"So are you guys good at bowling?" You asked the team in your car to think about something else than Bucky and also to avoid them asking questions about him.

"I don't think there's a thing I'm not good at." Tony said with a grin and it made you giggle quietly.

"Well, I never lose." Thor challenged. "So good luck beating me."

"You shouldn't have asked that, now they're getting fired up." Bruce said to you with a smile.

"How about you, are you good?" You asked.

"Eh, I manage. It's been a long time since I haven't played though." The doctor replied. "You'll see, it's easy and pretty fun."

"I'll show you how to aim so you can beat them." Thor promised as he leaned on you and you both smiled.

"What the fuck?" Bucky let out as he leaned forward on his seat and looked at Tony's car on the road. Steve's was just behind following the other car.

"Oh, c'mon." Nat said as she pushed him back on his seat from behind. "You're paranoid, she's not doing anything."

"Buck, chill. They're friends." Steve added.

"I don't see you acting like that towards her."

"You haven't paid attention because it's Steve and he's your best friend." Nat said to him. "He's constantly hugging her and babying her."

"Am I?" Steve asked as his brows furrowed in confusion.

"Steve never held her hand." Bucky said.

"So what? Maybe it's an Asgard thing." The winter soldier rolled his eyes at Nat's explanation. "Listen, if you pick a fight with him you'll definitively lose her. Just because **you** need space doesn't mean you have to isolate her from her friends."

"She's right, Buck." Steve said.

"And you have nothing to worry about." She added.

"What do you mean?" He asked her.

"Earlier I found her sitting by herself on a couch, she was staring at that pendant you gave her and crying. She told me she spent the whole afternoon there. She probably didn't even see time pass."

"That's so sad." Steve said.

"[Y/N] is crazy about you." Nat reassured Bucky. "Be nice to her tonight and by that I mean don't start saying mean things or throwing snarky comments if you catch her laughing with Thor for exemple."

"Why won't she laugh with me?"

"Are you kidding? With what you said to her or the attitude you've been giving her? She's terrified you're gonna ignore her or worse, make fun of her."

"I would nev-"

"You did. She told me about your argument in the car and the _cookies_." Bucky lowered his head as he thought about his behavior with you. "Don't remind her of all the people who've been awful to her all her life and instead re become the person she fell in love with."

 


	45. Bowling Night

You finally arrived at the bowling place. You were feeling well, you liked being in the car with Tony, Bruce and Thor. They made you laugh and you didn't speak about Bucky which is what you probably needed. Steve's car arrived right after and his team got out as well. They joined you before you entered the club.

"Go get your shoes, gang." Steve said to everybody. You followed them and then went on the aisle that was reserved for your group. As you tied your shoes someone sat next to you but you couldn't see who since you were bending over. When you leaned back you let out a little gasp because you were face to face with the winter soldier.

"You... look pretty." Bucky said in a quiet tone to you.

"W-What?" You were not sure you heard right.

"I said you look pretty." He repeated but with more confidence in his voice this time. You blushed brightly and your heart made a little jump.

"I-I..." You stuttered. Your heart started beating faster inside your chest as well. "T-Thank you, Bucky." You smiled shyly at him. You had no idea what was happening, you felt hot and bothered all over, his compliment cheered you up and made you less nervous. "I-It makes me happy that you said that." You said as you gently put your hand on his on the bench you were sitting on. Bucky got up suddenly and you missed his warmth already, his smell, his presence...

"You okay?" Nat asked as she sat next to you.

"Bucky said I looked pretty." You said to her happily with a smile on your face and tears in the corner of your eyes.

"See? It's getting better." She smiled back at you.

"[Y/N], do you wanna throw the first ball?" Tony asked you.

"No, I'll let you guys go first so I can see how it works." You told the Avengers who were waiting on your answer.

"Alright, I'll start then." Tony picked his bowling ball and then he started playing.

"Help her choose a ball." Steve whispered to Bucky as he elbowed his best friend on the side.

"What? No, I'm not the one who has to be forgiven this time." The winter soldier replied.

"Oh c'mon, don't play it like that." The captain said.

"If she wants my help she has to ask." Steve rolled his eyes before walking towards the bowling center, it was his turn to play.

"Come, let's pick our bowling balls." Nat said to you as she got up. You followed her to the rack where the balls were.

"Oh damn, they're super heavy!" You let out in surprise after you tried to pick up one.

"There's different weights." Thor said as he appeard behind you. "Try this one." He picked up a ball and put it between your hands.

"Oh. Yeah this one is better." You replied. "Thank you." You smiled at the God of thunder.

"See what I meant?" Steve said as he came back next to Bucky and put a hand on his shoulder. The winter soldier was watching you and the Asgardian interact with furrowed brows.

"Do you know how to hold and throw it?" Thor asked you. You shaked your head. "Put your fingers in the holes." He held the ball for you. "Yeah, like that. Now curl your fingers in so the ball doesn't fall and be careful to not throw it on somebody." He let out a small laugh.

"What are you doing? Waiting for her to spend the whole night with everyone except you?" Nat had left you and Thor and approached Bucky and Steve. "It should be you explaining to her how to play." She said to the winter soldier.

"Does it feel heavy on your arm?" Thor asked you.

"No, it's good." You replied.

"Alright. Come, I'll show you how to aim and throw." Thor walked you to the bowling center.

"Bucky." Nat called out to him.

"Alright. Fine." He let out exasperated. The winter soldier approached you and Thor. "Move." Bucky growled at the Asgardian as he put an arm around your shoulders. Thor raised his hands in surrender and took a few steps back.

"What are you doing?" You asked Bucky as you looked at him in confusion.

"Showing you how to play." He replied. Then he proceeded to explain to you the rules and how the points worked, your lips curved into a little smile as he spoke to you. "Are you listening to me?" Bucky asked.

"Hmm." You nodded and you swore you saw him smile slightly as well.

"Alright, show me what you got." He said before taking a step back. You held your ball between your hands as you looked at the bowling skittles in front of you. "Remember, don't step on the white line." Bucky reminded you as you took a step forward. You leaned and in those high waisted jeans of yours the winter soldier couldn't help his eyes wandering on your butt. You finally threw your ball and... you completely missed your aim. Your ball rolled on the side, hitting no skittles at all.

"Ah, too bad." You said as you turned over to look at your teammates.

"It's fine, you'll get better." Bruce said to you.

"My turn." Nat said as she got up from her seat with her bowling ball. She threw it and you heard the sound of all the skittles falling.

"A perfect strike." Steve commentated.

"How are you so perfect at everything?" You asked her as she grinned.

"And one perfect strike for Bucky as well." Tony said after the winter soldier threw his ball.

"I bet you gave me false instructions on purpose." You joked.

"Pick up your ball and come." Bucky said to you. "Your position was wrong."

"Why didn't you say anything then?" You asked as you walked back in front of the bowling center.

"I-" He couldn't say it was because he was distracted by your body. "I didn't have time to, you had thrown the ball already." He lied.

"Alright, how should I do it then?" You asked.

"First you wanna gain some momentum. Don't just stand in front of the line, your ball needs to go fast." Bucky went behind you and put his hand on the arm you were holding the bowling ball with. "Don't let the ball go yet. Make this movement." He gently bent your arm to show you how to throw. "Now with your legs. Before you throw the ball you're gonna stand on the foot that's opposite of the arm you're throwing with. If you throw with your right hand, you're gonna stand on?"

"My left foot." You replied.

"Exact." He smiled at you. "See, you're not stupid." You bit onto your lower lip as you stared into his eyes, his face was just inches away from yours. Your heart beat fast against your ribcage, you missed him so much. "Alright, now take a few steps back to gain momentum then throw." The winter soldier said as leaned back. You breathed deeply as you concentrated then you marched forward and put your weight on your foot before throwing the ball.

"Hey, you made it!" Steve cheered. It wasn't a strike but you knocked some skittles over.

"Thank you, Bucky." You said to him happily and he smiled at you. "So, who's winning?" You asked the Avengers.

"Uh..." Bruce started. You raised your head to look at the small screen that displayed your team's points.

"Oh." You let out. They all had a lot of points except... you.

"It's okay, it's your first time." Steve said as he approached you and put a hand on your shoulder.

"I'm not upset, I'm having a lot of fun." You smiled.

"Look how the champions play if you wanna win, loser." Tony threw at you playfully as he approached the bowling center.

"Hey!" Steve defended you.

"It's fine, Steve." You giggled.

"Told you, always babying her." Nat whispered to Bucky.

"Success!" Tony said as he turned around and you clapped for him after he hit another strike.

"You can do it this time." Thor encouraged you as you got up, it was your turn.

"C'mon [Y/N]!" Nat cheered as well.

"You guys are making me nervous." You said quietly. You picked up your ball and approached the bowling center.

"Wait." Bucky said as he came back behind you. "Aim it in that direction this time." You looked at him before nodding. You took a few steps back then advanced forward fastly and threw your ball. You watched it roll in anticipation and then your eyes widened as you heard cheers behind you coming from the Avengers.

"I did it!" You said as you turned around with a bright grin. And in the excitement you don't know how but suddenly you found yourself with your arms wrapped around Bucky as he picked you up in his and he made a little twirl as you both hugged.

"S-Sorry." Bucky said quietly as he put you back down. You were both looking at each other in confusion as if you had just realized what you've done.

"I-It's fine." You replied with a small blush on your cheeks. "It's not our first hug." You smiled timidly. "And not the last." You replied with more confidence before walking away from him to sit.

  
  


\---

  
  


"I'm getting hungry, do you guys want pizza?" Nat suggested.

"Great idea." Tony replied.

"You and [Y/N] should go order." Steve said.

"Oh my God, is this about the zoo thing?" You and Nat started laughing. The captain rolled his eyes.

"It totally is the zoo thing."

"What's the zoo thing?" Thor asked.

"Nothing, forget it." Steve replied as he crossed his arms on his chest.

"But alright, come on [Y/N]." You grabbed the hand Nat was giving you and then you both went by the counter to order pizza for everyone.

You and Nat decided to take a mix of different pizzas so everyone would be satisfied. But before returning you grabbed her arm.

"W-Wait I... I want to take something else for Bucky. I-I know it's nothing but I should start somewhere." You said to her.

"That's not a bad idea." Nat smiled at you. "What do you have in mind?"

"Uhh... I don't know, just a small attention like he does to me." You said.

"Well, look over the counter. They're also selling candies and stuff, you can go with that." She suggested.

"Do you think he'll accept those tiny heart shaped chocolates?" You pointed at the treat.

"It's adorable like you." Nat smiled. "I think it will melt his heart."

"God, I hope you're right." You sighed.

"By the way, what happened back there? He hugged you, right?"

"Well... You all saw." You smiled. "I-It made me really happy but when he put me down he... apologized. As if it was something bad." You said.

"Don't worry about it. You must be a bit reassured though, even when he's mad at you Bucky can't keep his hands off you." She said.

"I miss him so much, I can't wait until this is all over."

"It will soon be over and one day you and Bucky will think about this and laugh it off."

"Thank you, Nat." You smiled at her.

"Come on, take those chocolates and let's head back for dinner."

  
  


You were sitting between Bruce and Tony while you were eating pizza and they were arguing with Thor and Steve about who will win the game.

"C'mon, we gotta give the loser a dare. Something so humiliating it will make it on the news." Tony said.

"I'm gonna lose then, I'm the one who has the less points." You said.

"Oh no, you're not in. It's your first time playing." Thor said. "And it's him I'm challenging." The Asgardian pointed to Tony.

"I told you in the car this was gonna be bad." Bruce said to you.

"I thought we were playing just for fun." Steve said.

"What's the point of games if there's no rewards at the end?" Tony asked.

"I just told you-" Steve said. "Fun."

While they were arguing you noticed Bucky and Nat speaking together, you would've joined them but things were still awkward between you and the winter soldier. You were waiting for a chance to be alone together so you could give him the sweets you got. You knew it was nothing and the path for forgiveness was still long but you just wanted him to know that he was always on your mind and that you loved him. Just that. Bucky was seated between Nat and Steve so for now there was no way you could squeeze yourself there to talk with him.

"Oh, it's on. I challenge you to one final game." Tony said to Thor.

"About time." The God of thunder said as he got up from his seat.

"Come on, Bruce." Steve sighed loudly before getting up as well to follow Tony and Thor. You didn't know what was said between the four men in the last minutes because you were in your thoughts thinking about the winter soldier but all you knew was that now you could steal Steve's seat. You got up and approached Bucky and Nat.

"I suddenly feel like playing one more game." She said as she got up. She winked at you before joining the guys.

"Can I?" You asked Bucky as you pointed at the free seat next to him.

"Yeah." He replied.

"I wanted to give you this." You said as you took his hand in yours and opened his palm to put the tiny heart shaped chocolates in.

"What's that?" He asked as he stared at his hand in confusion.

"What does it look like?" You giggled lightly. "They're chocolates." You said.

"Why?" Bucky raised his head to look into your eyes.

"What, you're the only one who can give me gifts?" You joked before letting out a low sigh. "I just want you to know that I love you." You admitted.

"[Y/N]-" He started.

"I don't care if you don't want to hear it, I do and it's what I feel in my heart." You said as you stared back at him. "And I don't care how long it will take for you to forgive me. I'm not giving up on you and I will fight for you." Bucky smiled slightly before lowering his gaze on the chocolates in his palm.

"Thanks." He replied. You leaned on him and put a kiss against his cheek before getting up and joining the others.

"Oh God, is their thing still going on?" You asked Bruce as you sat next to him. You saw Bucky join everyone soon after you as well.

"With egos as big as theirs this can last forever." The doctor replied to you.

"Hey, [Y/N]. Do you want to throw one more ball?" Steve asked you.

"Uh, sure. Why not?" You smiled as you got up. You approached the rack and the bowling ball that you used to throw until now was gone so you took another but it was heavier. You approached the bowling center while holding your heavy ball between your two hands. You held it in one hand to put your fingers in the holes but it was so heavy it slipped out of your hands and landed on your foot.

"AH!" You let out a scream of pain. The loud thud of the ball resonated as well when it hit the ground and it made all the Avengers turn their heads to you.

"Doll!" Bucky jumped from his seat and ran to you.

"Are you okay?" Steve asked as he approached you as well.

"My foot hurts but I'll survi- Wah!" You gasped when the winter soldier picked you up to bring you to the bench. He made you sit on it then he kneeled in front of you. "W-What are you doing?" You blushed.

"Show me your foot." He said as he grabbed your ankle and proceeded to take off your shoe.

"Bucky, I'm fine!" You whined.

"We have to take you to hospital." He said as he looked at your foot. You leaned and looked too.

"Are you kidding? We're not gonna bother a doctor for this, it's just swollen and red, I'll put an ice pack on it when we go home and tomorrow it will be gone." You said. Steve was about to approach the both of you as he heard you two's voices getting a bit louder but Nat held him back.

"Let them, she's fine. He loves taking care of her." She said to the captain.

"Why are you so stubborn?" Bucky asked.

"Because I'm fine." You repeated. "Listen. If it still hurts tomorrow I'll call a doc, deal?" Bucky looked at you before sighing in resignation.

"Fine." He said as he got up. "Stay here, I'll go see if I can get an ice pack." Then he walked towards the counter.

"Are you okay?" The others asked as they approached you.

"H-He called me doll again." You said happily. Half of them rolled their eyes and the other half laughed.

"Now I wonder if you dropped that ball on purpose." Nat raised one eyebrow as she smirked.

"I didn't but the pain's worth it." You smiled as you turned your head over the counter and looked at Bucky. "But yes, thank you all. I'm fine, it's just swollen a bit."

"Well, I think we had enough fun for the night." The captain said.

"But what about our game?" Tony asked and Steve rolled his eyes.

"They don't have anything." Bucky said as he came back.

"It's fine, Steve said we're going home anyway." You said as you tried to get up on one foot.

"What are you doing?" The winter soldier asked. He gave you your shoe since you couldn't wear it because of the swelling and then he picked you up again.

"Bucky, I can walk." You argued.

"Like hell you can." He replied. "Just stop struggling until I put you in the car." You wrapped your arms around his neck and smiled at him. "Don't take advantage of this." He said with a smile.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." You teased.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, I just wanted to warn you guys that I learned some bad news in my personal life. I will be fine but it might impact my writing speed. I'm up to chapter 49 and I will keep posting them daily but yeah just don't get worried if it gets slower around chapter 50.  
> Thank you for reading<3


	46. Emergency Mission

Bucky carried you as he walked through the bowling club and then outside where you split up again for the cars but this time you climbed in Steve's vehicle. The winter soldier dropped you carefully on the backseat before he climbed next to you, leaving Steve and Nat at the front.

"You're okay, [Y/N]?" Steve asked again.

"Yes, it's just Bucky making a big deal out of it." You replied. The winter soldier rolled his eyes.

"Aww." Nat cooed.

"So, did you like bowling?" The captain asked as he started the car.

"Well, except for the last part, I did, it was pretty fun." You smiled.

"I missed those nights with everybody." Nat said. "It was pretty calm while you were away on the mission." She added.

"I missed them too and I love spending time with you all don't get me wrong-" You started. "But I prefered the mission."

"The mission?" Steve asked in confusion. Nat huffed in annoyance.

"She meant when she was with Bucky." She explained to the captain.

"O-Oh..." He let out as realization suddenly hit him. Bucky stayed silent while the three of you spoke, he looked by the window but he had indeed heard the whole conversation. During the ride you bent your leg and put your ankle on your knee to check how your foot was doing. It was still swelled and you started feeling little stings like those you feel after a slap.

"Does it hurt?" Bucky asked after he turned his head towards you and found you looking at your foot.

"No." You replied. "Just stings a little but it'll get better with some ice."

"Can I?" He asked as he came closer to you. You nodded. "Sit horizontally on the seat."

"What?"

"Just do it." Bucky patted his lap. "Lay your legs and put your ankles on here." You gulped before doing as he said. He carefully put his fingers on your ankles and you giggled. "What's so funny?" He asked with a smile.

"You're tickling me." You replied. Bucky leaned and he started blowing on your aching foot. You bit onto your lower lip as you watched him, it helped a little. God, your heart beat so fast inside you. You wanted to ask him why he kept doing stuff like that that moved you and just made you fall more in love with him if he was mad at you but suddenly you rememberd you both were not alone at the moment. Steve and Nat were probably aware of what was going on in the backseat but they said nothing in hope to not break your little moment with Bucky. You were very thankful.

Twenty minutes later you finally arrived in the parking lot of the tower.

"Don't move." Bucky said to you as he opened his door and got out. He came by your side and opened the door before carrying you back in his arms.

"Bucky, you don't have to do this." You said to him.

"Stay silent." He said to you.

"I think you're the one taking advantage of the situation." You teased. You bid goodnight to everybody and then you took the elevator with Bucky.

"I'm gonna drop you in your room before I go get you an ice pack from the kitchen." He explained to you.

"Thank you." You smiled at him in gratitude.

"Don't move from your bed." He said after he carefully put you on it then he got out. It was pretty late so you changed into your pajamas before the winter soldier would come back. That way you could sleep immediately.

"That was quick." You said after he stepped back inside your room. You had literally just put on your pajama top.

"I told you to not move." Bucky said with furrowed brows.

"Bucky, listen to me. I am fine." You re repeated. He rolled his eyes before he pointed to your bed.

"Climb on it." You laid on your bed and Bucky sat on the edge of it, he took your ankle gently and put it on his thigh then he carefully put the ice pack on your foot.

"Ow, cold." You winced.

"You're such a baby." He couldn't help a chuckle escape his mouth.

"Hey!" You said in a fake offended voice. "Do you plan on holding my foot all night? It's okay now."

"Fine, I'll leave." Bucky said as he got up.

"W-Wait!" You stopped him. "Come." You said. "Lay next to me."

"No." He replied.

"I'm not gonna jump on you, I just want to talk." You said. You saw him hesitate. "Please, just for a short moment." You said in a soft voice. Bucky sighed before coming back towards your bed.

"What do you want to talk about?" He asked.

"I-I just wanted to thank you for tonight." You smiled slightly. "I had fun and I-I'm glad we didn't argue." You said. Bucky simply listened to you, he didn't reply. You slowly reached for his hand and took it in yours before bringing to your lips and kissing it. "I love you." You whispered to him as you looked at his face. He sighed deeply.

"I do too." Bucky finally let out and your eyes widened. "But I can't, it's too soon."

"Are you still mad at me?" You asked in a quiet voice.

"Yes."

"But why?"

"I don't think you're being honest with your feelings." Your expression changed from joyous to sad. Bucky let go of your hand.

"I-I thought that tonight... We got back what we had." You said.

"I will always protect you because I still lov-" He took a deep breath. "But I can't be with you while you're still thinking about another man."

"But-" You tried to explain yourself.

"No." He said as he got up from your bed. "Goodnight, [Y/N]." Bucky said before grabbing the doorknob and getting out of your room.

You wiped the small tears that appeard in the corner of your eyes and then turned off the lights to sleep.

  
  


\---

  
  


You went to bed earlier than usual, it was around 10pm when sleep finally consumed you but three hours later someone knocked at your door and woke you up. Your brows furrowed as you checked the time on your nightstand. Who was bothering you at 1am and what did they want??

"Tony?" Your eyes widened when you saw him stand next to your doorframe. "Do you need something?" You asked as you rubbed your eyes awake.

"Put your clothes on. Emergency mission." He said to you.

"What?? What happened?" You asked.

"Fast, I'll explain to you later." You nodded and closed the door. You went in the bathroom quickly and then put on your clothes. Two minutes later you re opened the door. "Come." He grabbed your arm and you ran to the elevator.

"Ow!" You winced.

"What's wrong?" Tony asked.

"Nothing, it's just my foot. I'm fine." He released you when you got in the elevator. "Will you tell me what's happening now?"

"An Avengers member got badly injured."

"How bad?" You asked.

"Might lose his leg." Tony sighed deeply. That's the first time you've seen him seem really stressed.

"Who? Do I know him?"

"Peter. Parker." He added after you looked confused.

"Wait, the teen right?" You asked. "Your... intern..?"

"Yes, him." You got out of the elevator and walked towards the entrance.

"What are you doing here?" You asked when you saw Thor in the hall as well.

"He's gonna go with you. I can't come." Tony explained to you.

"Okay." After all you had no problem with that and Thor was your friend so you were reassured to be with someone at least. The three of you walked outside the tower, you expected to see a car somewhere but there was nothing.

"Hang on tight." The Asgardian said to you.

"Please tell me we're not flying." You begged him.

"[Y/N], there's no time." Tony said to you. "And car isn't fast enough."

"Ugh, fine. But don't you dare drop me." You said to Thor and he chuckled. The God of thunder came closer to you and wrapped his arm tightly around your waist while you clinged just as tight on him and then you closed your eyes in anticipation. The Asgardian did a rotation trick with his mighty hammer Mjölnir and then you were fastly projected towards the sky. You were pretty sure you screamed the whole time and when you finally landed on ground you let go of him. Your eyes rolled in the back of your head as you fell but Thor quickly catched you back in his arm before your body hit the floor.

"It's fine, it... happens." He explained.

"That's..." You breathed deeply. "The last time I do that." You said. You looked around you when you regained control of your senses and you noticed that you were standing in front of a building. It looked like a lab, it had glass walls and looked pretty modern. "Do you know this place?" You asked Thor.

"It's owned by SHIELD, it's all that I know of. They do several things in there. Loki was emprisoned in too once." He said to you while you walked towards the entrance door. Made sense to you, Peter was probably in such a bad state that they wouldn't put him in a normal hospital.

"Why did they make you come with me?" You asked to Thor.

"I'm your transport." He smiled at you.

"Is that all?" You asked with a small smile.

"I wasn't asleep yet and I was bored." He added.

"Thor..."

"I was worried about you." You sighed lowly.

"Why? There's no need to." You said.

"This world is dangerous and we don't know where all our enemies are. As everyone said to you already we need you and we can't lose you."

"That's very nice and I'm gonna assume half the things you said were true but you're hiding from me your promise to Loki." You said.

"I'm not hiding anything, I told you about it." He smiled.

"Fine, alright." You giggled slightly. As you walked through the empty building, it was late at night so no one was working anymore, someone recognized Thor and approached the both of you.

"Hi, I've been warned of your arrival. You must be [Y/N]." The SHIELD female assistant said to you.

"Indeed." You smiled politely at her.

"Follow me, please." She guided you and the God of thunder through the building until you reached a quiet floor. The hallway looked like a hospital aisle so you deducted Peter was here. She opened a door and yep, it was literally a hospital room. Had all sort of machines and tools and in the middle of it a bed with someone laid on it.

"Tell me everything about his injury and his condition at the moment." You said to her. "Is he asleep or fainted?" You asked.

"He was unconscious when he arrived here, probably from the pain but he's stable now and sleeping. A doctor saw his leg already and the wound was cleansed but his bones and tendons are severly damaged, beyond repair according to the professionals." She explained. You approached him and started removing the bandages they wrapped his leg in. "Do you need something?" She asked you, meaning assistance or tools.

"A bottle of water would be nice." You replied. She nodded and went out.

"Do you want me to stay behind the door?" Thor asked you.

"No, no, you can stay it's fine." You replied. "Oh, damn, that's bad." You commentated after you finally removed the last piece of bandage. The old blood was cleaned but as soon as you removed the pieces of cloth the wound reopened and red liquid spilled out. "Thor are you... sensitive to the sight of blood?"

"You're asking to a warrior like me if he's afraid of blood?" You smiled slightly.

"Right, sorry. Can you please hold his thigh together, his skin is ripped and a lot of blood is coming out. My healing will be useless if he dies of blood loss. I'm not a miracle maker." You said. Thor approached you. "Put your palms here and keep his wound from opening, I'll start by healing him there then I'll do his broken knee."

"Here's your water bot-" The female SHIELD assistant got interrupted as she gasped at the sight in front of her. "I'm gonna call the medic team."

"We are fine, leave us." Thor said to her. You didn't have time to deal with her, you rolled up your sleeves and then put your palms against the huge and deep cut on Peter's thigh. You closed your eyes and let your powers flow from your body to his. You just hoped you would be able to heal him entirely before being drained out of all your energy.

"Hhhhn." Your brows furrowed as you used your powers for a long time.

"You're doing well, the blood isn't coming out of his thigh anymore." Thor said in a low voice to not disturb you, since your eyes were closed he thought he'd be a good idea to inform you of what was happening. You've been healing Peter's thigh for forty-five minutes now. Healing small cuts took seconds but healing broken bones took way longer. You knew you would be there all night.

Two hours and a half later his thigh was finally fixed and looked like new. You needed a little break before touching his knee. You were panting when you took your hands off him, you dropped on a chair behind you.

"Are you gonna be okay?" Thor asked you.

"I have to." You replied. "It's fine, I just need to rest a few minutes." You wiped the sweat off your forehead before opening your water bottle and taking a few sips from it. "Thanks for staying with me."

"No problem." The Asgardian replied with a smile.

"Thor I just want to-" You sighed. "It's not my place to say this but-" You raised your head to look at him. "I'm sorry about... Bucky."

"What about him?" He asked.

"You know... He's acting a little hostile with you... I really don't think it's your fault though, I guess you just remind him of-"

"I get it, don't worry about that."

"Just don't take it personally when he's rude with you, it's not you he's mad at it's me." You said a bit sadly.

"Things were better during the bowling, no?" Thor asked.

"I thought so as well... But he still thinks I love Loki."

"And do you?" You stayed silent for a short moment.

"I really liked spending time with your brother, Thor." You said. "I think he's a great person and I want him to be happy... But it won't be with me." You closed the cap on your water bottle. "I love Bucky and he's the one I want to spend the rest of my life with."

"I understand." Thor replied.

"Come on." You said before getting up. "I want to finish this before the sun comes out." You put your hand against your mouth as you yawned.

"Are you sure you don't wanna rest more?" The God of thunder asked.

"Yeah, don't worry." You approached Peter's bed and took a deep breath before putting your hands against his knee. You closed your eyes and healed. "Please just keep me entertained." You asked Thor. "This might take a while and I don't want to fall asleep."

"Alright. I have a few war battles I'm proud of, I can tell you about them." He smiled proudly.

"I'm listening." You said.

Two hours later Peter's knee was finally healed and his leg was out of danger.

"[Y/N], that's incredible." Thor commentated. "There's no blood and not a single scar on his leg." He raised his eyes to look at you after he examined Peter's leg and he got worried. "Are you okay, you're really pale." The Asgardian said to you.

"I-I feel tired..." You panted and spoke in a very weak voice.

"[Y/N]!" Thor yelling your name is the last thing you heard before you lost consciousness.

 


	47. Drained

"I-Is she going to be okay?? I feel so bad."

"Stop panicking. I think she's waking up."

"Wh-" You opened your eyes and saw two heads looking at you from above. "Thor? What happened?" You asked weakly.

"You fainted after you finished healing him." The God of thunder pointed to Peter who was awake and standing looking at you.

"Hey, I-I'm Peter. I'm really sorry you fainted because of me." He spoke very quickly and it just made you dizzy.

"Slower..." You said to him.

"Here." Thor approached your water bottle to your mouth so you could drink. You took a few sips before sitting more straightly on your chair.

"How long has it been since I fainted?"

"Half an hour? Peter woke up 10 minutes after you healed him."

"Can I do anything? Do you need sugar maybe?" Peter asked you.

"I'm fine, I feel better." You said. "How are you?" You asked him.

"O-Oh, I'm fantastic. Thor told me you healed me, how did you do it?? I remember the pain was awful and it looked really bad."

"Oh trust me, it was." You said. "I see that you can stand, I'm glad." You smiled at him.

"I already explained to you she has healing powers." Thor said to Peter.

"You're incredible, I owe you my life. My leg is like new." The teen said happily as he grinned brightly.

"Don't worry about it, it's my job. Just be careful, you were losing a lot of blood, we could've lost you." You warned him.

"Yeah, I know. I was chasing those bad guys a-and suddenly and very quickly my leg got stuck and I-I struggled and it got even badder and-"

"Peter." You said as you reached for his hand. "It's fine, you're okay now." You calmed him and then handed him your bottle. "You should have a sip as well."

"S-Sorry..." He lowered his head.

"So what now?" You asked Thor.

"We can return to the tower. No offense to you but you look terrible, you need to sleep." The God of thunder said to you.

"Thanks." You said sarcastically.

"Peter?! Oh thank God, you're awake." Happy Hogan said as he suddenly broke into the room.

"Hey, Happy." Peter greeted him.

"You're standing?? I got an email from Tony saying you almost lost your leg."

"I did but thanks to- uh I-I'm sorry, I didn't ask your name." The teen said timidly as he looked at you.

"I'm [Y/N]." You smiled at him before reporting your attention to Happy.

"[Y/N], she has healing powers and she fixed my leg!" He explained excitedly.

"I'm sorry, hi." Happy shook your hand and Thor's. "We met, right?" He asked you.

"You were there when I first met Tony, yeah. Though it's been months." You said.

"Ah, that rings a bell indeed." He said. "Excuse me, I gotta report to Tony that you're fine now." Happy said to Peter before pulling out his phone.

"Well, If I'm not needed anymore I'd like to go home now." You said as you got up but you did so quickly you felt dizzy and fell back in your chair.

"[Y/N], don't move." Thor ordered you.

"Oh, no, no. We're not flying with your hammer again." You warned the Asgardian.

"You guys flew to come here?? That's awesome!" Peter beamed.

"Tony is inviting you over for breakfast if you want." Happy said to Peter.

"Ok, cool. It'd be nice to see him again." The teen smiled.

"Happy, you have a car right?" You asked.

"Why wouldn't I have one?" He replied. You looked at Thor as you raised one eyebrow.

"Fine." The God of thunder complied. "But you should know that a lot of women would kill to fly with me." You giggled.

"Not just... women." Peter added.

"I brought you clothes, put them on and let's go." Happy said to Peter.

"Can you lend me your arm?" You asked Thor. "I don't think I can stand on my own."

"Put your arm around my neck." He said as he kneeled to your level. You did as he said and then he put one of his arm around your back and the other under your knees to carry you in bridal style. You were honestly too weak to argue and you knew he was strong enough to support your weight so you let him.

"Thank you." You said to him.

Happy Hogan had already warned the SHIELD assistant that you guys were leaving and that Peter was out of danger. The four of you got into Happy's car and then you were on your way to the tower. The sun was up already, it was around 7am when you left the building.

"I'm gonna drop by the bakery to buy a few treats for everyone at the tower." Happy said as he drove. Thor was sitting next to him and you were with Peter in the backseat.

"Can you do me one little favor, Peter?" You asked him.

"After what you did for me? You're kidding? I'm forever in your debt." He said.

"It was just my job." You reminded him. "But I'm gonna use that opportunity so that you can't say no to my request." You smiled at him.

"What can I do for you?" Peter asked.

"You see... I'm in a bit of trouble with my boyfriend at the moment..."

"Wait are you dating Thor? Damn, I should've noticed."

"No! No, it's not him."

"Is it an Avengers member?" He asked.

"Why does it matter?" You asked.

"Right, right. I'm sorry I'm just curious." He said.

"It's okay." You said. "And yes he is." You admitted with a little smile.

"Wait, don't tell me who. Let me guess." He thought for a short moment. "The choices are limited if he's in the tower... Is it Captain America?" His eyes widened.

"No." You giggled.

"I don't see who then... Mr. Stark is with Mrs. Potts, I highly doubt you're dating Dr. Banner..."

"Is there someone you didn't think of?" You teased.

"Wait." He suddenly realized. "No, you can't be dating him..." You started nodding. "The winter soldier?? The guy with the badass metal arm??"

"Bingo!" You said excitedly.

"B-But... how? Not that it's you, really not. He just always seemed so... mysterious and cold like he doesn't have emotions."

"You're being rude about the man that I love Peter." You joked.

"I-I'm sorry I didn't mean to!"

"I'm kidding." You giggled. "Don't worry, the others were surprised too. But anyway, back to the favor I'm asking you."

"Yes, right! I'm listening." Peter said.

"I'm not gonna go into the details but we're in the middle of an argument and he's mad at me so I try to do things to be forgiven."

"Hmm, I understand but what role do I play in here?" He asked.

"You see I... This is new to me, dating and stuff and I don't have a lot of ideas... So when Happy go into that bakery I would like you to go with him and order a cake for me so that I can gift it to Bucky. Don't worry I'll pay for it."

"I'm not worried about that." Peter said as he lowered his head. "I just don't know, what does he like? Is he more fruits or chocolate?"

"Just take something that you would've been happy to receive, okay? Imagine you're mad at your girlfriend and when she offers you that cake, even if it will not make you forgive her you will appreciate the gesture and it will ease a bit of the pain she inflicted on you."

"I'm really sorry for whatever happened between the two of you, you seem very nice." He said to you.

"Thank you Peter, you're really sweet." You smiled at him as you put your hand on his shoulder. "So can I count on you?" You asked.

"I'll do my best!" He said with confidence.

"Thank you, sincerely." You said.

"What are you both scheming in the back, whispering and stuff?" Happy asked as he looked at you and Peter from the rearview mirror.

"Nothing you have to be concerned about." You replied.

  
  


You finally arrived at the parking lot of the tower. Peter had picked a really cute cake for you to offer to Bucky, it had small lovely decorations and different flavors so you were sure the winter soldier couldn't not be charmed by it.

You got out of the car and when Thor was about to help you you stopped him.

"I-I'm very thankful for your help Thor but I-I don't wanna give any reason to Bucky to be mad at me and I'm afraid it will annoy him if he sees you carrying me." You explained.

"Don't worry, I understand." The God of thunder smiled at you. "Are you gonna be okay though?"

"She will." Peter replied in your place. "You can borrow my shoulder, [Y/N]." He said happily to you.

"Thank you. I promise you it won't be long, we only have to take the elevator and walk through a hallway." You said to him before putting your arm around his shoulders and walking slowly with him. "I just need to get a bit of food inside of me and then I'm off to sleep." You said.

The four of you entered the elevator and then you walked through the hallway to reach the dining room.

"Hey." Thor announced your presence to the Avengers.

"Ah, you're here!" Tony smiled at all of you.

"What are all of you doing here?" Nat asked.

"Right, I did thought I forgot something." Tony muttered.

"Well, don't just stand near the doorframe. Take a seat and tell us." Steve said as he got up. They could only see Thor and Happy, they saw there were more people behind them but with their builds they couldn't see who.

"What the fuck??" Bucky got up from his chair when he saw you stand weakly and with Peter's help. "Why do you look so terrible?" He asked you as he took you from Peter and carried you to sit on a chair.

"Tony??" Bruce asked.

"Just sit down, I'll explain."

"We brought you breakfast." Happy said as he put the sweet treats on the table.

"[Y/N], are you okay? You look really bad." Steve said as he came next to you as well.

"Stop panicking you're making me panic." You said to Bucky and Steve. "I'm just drained of energy, I healed all night." You explained.

"Tony!" Bucky yelled at him. "What does she mean she healed all night, what the hell?"

"I-I'm sorry, it's my fault." Peter said.

"Stop, we talked about this." You said to him. "It wasn't your fault and healing is my job." You said.

"Stop putting yourself in danger!" Bucky yelled at you.

"Stop screaming at her." Nat said to him.

"Are you worried about me?" You smiled slightly. Bucky rolled his eyes then his lips curved into a little smile.

"Enough!" Tony said. "Everyone calm down and sit, I'll explain." Everyone started shifting around you and they took seats. Bucky and Steve stayed next to you. "First of all, Peter, how are you?"

"Oh, I've never been better Mr. Stark thanks to [Y/N]." He turned his head to smile at you and you gave him back his smile.

"And you [Y/N]?" Tony asked you.

"Not gonna lie... Exhausted. I'm just here to get a bit of sugar in my system then I'm gonna sleep."

"Yeah, you should, you look terrible." He said.

"Watch your words." Bucky glared at Tony who then raised his arms in surrender.

"What about Hogan and Thor?" Nat asked.

"Well, I look after the kid." Happy said, talking about Peter.

"Thor was awake when I got the call about Peter's condition so I asked him to accompany [Y/N]. He's fast and can protect her." Tony explained.

"He did an amazing job, she looks like she's about to die." Bucky said sarcastically.

"Stop." You said to him. "He helped me a lot."

"Why didn't you come to me?" The winter soldier asked you.

"I had no choice! Tony woke me up at 1am and hurried me to leave, Thor was already ready and we had to be quick. Peter was losing a lot of blood."

"Wh- 1am?!" His eyes widened. "It's almost 8, you healed the whole night?!"

"That's what I said earlier, yes." You said.

"You know using your power drains your energy, why would you do that?!"

"Didn't you hear what I just said, Peter almost died of blood loss." Bucky wanted to say better him than you but that was just awful so he kept quiet, he knew you would be mad at him for saying that out loud.

"What happened to you?" Steve asked to Peter.

"It doesn't matter." You replied in his place. You knew Peter was feeling bad and still a bit stressed about what happened to him, you didn't want him to feel more nervous and having the pressure to explain himself in front of everybody. "He's okay and it's all that matters." You looked at Bucky. "And I'm as well. We're all fine so please stop yelling."

"She's right. Everyone calm down." Nat came to your help. "You two need to stop babysitting her, it was cute at first but now it's just weird." She said to Bucky and Steve. "So what did you bring us?" She asked Happy about the treats.

Everyone finally chilled and they started eating and talking with each other. Bucky gently ran his hand through your hair as he looked at you, you turned your head and smiled slightly at him. You crossed eyes with Peter and he gave you a thumbs up to encourage you to give your gift to the winter soldier.

"I have something for you." You said to him.

"What?" Bucky asked in confusion. You leaned on the table and grabbed the box that was reserved for him.

"Here." You bit onto your lower lip as you weakly pushed the box in front of him.

"First of all stop moving and please eat something." He worried.

"Will you feed me?" You asked softly. He sighed deeply as he looked at you before smiling a bit.

"Fine." Bucky resigned himself. "But only because I'm pretty sure you're too weak to lift your arms." He stood up and filled you a glass with milk then he came back next to you.

"You know me so well." You smiled.

"Stop dreaming, everyone knows you drink milk for breakfast." He chuckled lowly.

"You're not gonna open your gift?" You asked after taking a sip.

"What did you get me this time?" Bucky said as he carefully put his hands on the box.

"It's not much, I just thought about you on the way here." You said.

"In the state you were in?"

"I'm always thinking of you."

"Not _always_." He erased the smile off your face and as tears started blurring your vision you bit onto your lower lip to stop it from trembling. Bucky clicked his tongue as he noticed the sad expression on your face. "I didn't mean, I'm sorry." You turned your head the other way so he wouldn't see you crying.

"N-No..." You turned your head back to look at him. "Y-You're right... I messed up." You said with a sad smile as a fat tear rolled down your cheek. Bucky approached his hand to your face and wiped your tear before caressing your cheek. You lowered your head and took a deep breath.

"Eat with me, please."

"I... honestly don't feel like eating." You said.

"I'll feed you."

"My throat is constricted, even if I wanted to I can't." You explained.

"Are you okay, [Y/N]?" Peter asked you as he noticed you crying. Suddenly everyone turned their heads towards you and noticed as well.

"Y-Yeah... I'm just tired and my body is expressing it. I'm gonna go to bed soon." You reassured everyone with an half lie.

"I'm the one who's gonna bring you to your room but first I want you to eat." Bucky said and he grabbed your hand under the table. "Let me see what you brought me." He, at long last, opened the dessert box and he smiled at the sight of the pretty cake you bought for him. "Thank you, it looks delicious." The winter soldier smiled at you. He picked up a spoon and took a piece of the cake before bringing it to your lips.

"No, that one is yours." You said.

"I'm not gonna eat it by myself. Come on, open up." You looked at him in resignation before opening your mouth. "How is it?"

"Better than my apple pie." You said with a little smile.

"I doubt it. That pie was the best thing I've ever had." Bucky revealed.

"Stop playing me." You rolled your eyes.

"I'm not." He ate a piece of the cake as well. "Hmm, it's good indeed." He commentated. "But not as much as your apple pie." You giggled as you wiped the last tears off your eyes.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I watched far from home two weeks ago and I love Peter and Happy so I decided to include them in my story. Did you guys like the movie as well?  
> Thanks for reading <3


	48. Get Him Back

You were all done with breakfast so you decided to retreat to your room to sleep, the night has been very long and stressful. Now that you had food inside of you you felt a little better and you had regained a bit of colors on your face.

"Peter, come here." You called him to sit next to you. You were all still sitting around the dining table.

"Did you need something?" He asked as he sat next to you.

"I wanted to thank you for the cake choice, it was good."

"Oh, that's nothing." Peter smiled.

"Also I didn't have time to finish my work because I passed out right after healing your leg so let me-"

"Wait, wait!" He stopped as you approached your hands to him. "Are you sure that's a good idea, I mean you're still very tired." Peter worried.

"Don't worry, small cuts and bruises don't drain me." You explained. "I was drained because your bones were broken and your thigh looked like ground beef." You said as you raised one eyebrow and he winced as he imagined that picture. "You got a big bruise over your eye and I'd hate to leave it on your adorable face." You smiled at him.

"Oh, that's why the woman at the bakery looked at me weird." He rememberd.

"Close your eyes and don't flinch when I touch you. It's not gonna hurt." You warned him. Peter did as you said and you put your hand on the side of his face.

"What the hell are you doing?" Bucky asked suddenly as he turned to look at you.

"Shh!" You shushed him.

"You're in no condition to be using your powers!" He scolded you. You ignored him and focused on Peter.

"It's done." You said as you removed your hand.

"Wow. Your powers are the most incredible I've seen!" He said excitedly.

"Are you hurt somewhere else? I didn't have time to check when we were back there."

"N-No. No, I think I'm good. Nothing hurts."

"Okay. Well, I don't know if you're gonna be around when I wake up later so I'm gonna hug you now and say bye alright?" You smiled at him before opening your arms.

"Yes, of course." Peter smiled before embracing you.

"Don't worry, okay? You were doing the right thing when you were chasing those bad guys, nothing was your fault. Accidents happen to everybody." You whispered to him while you hugged so only he could hear. You knew what it felt like to be anxious and worried about everything. "Just promise me you're gonna be more careful so the next time we see each other it won't be for healing." You released him.

"I promise." He smiled at you.

"It was very nice to meet you, Peter." You said to him.

"What do you think you're doing?" Bucky asked you as you were about to get up.

"Going to my room?" You said.

"You can't move, you're too weak." The winter soldier reminded you before picking you up in his arms.

"Bucky, I feel better I can stand on my own." You argued.

"Yeah? And next thing I know I have you passed out on the floor of this room. Stay silent." He ordered you as he walked past everybody to reach the door.

"Wait, I didn't say bye to Happy." Bucky rolled his eyes.

"Hey, Happy!" He called out to him.

"Yeah?" He turned to whoever was calling him, he was having a conversation with Bruce.

"[Y/N] says bye." Then Bucky turned his head to you. "Can we go now?" You rolled your eyes and waved goodbye to Happy and Peter.

"Why are you like this?" You asked him.

"Stop putting yourself in unnecessary danger." He said as he walked to the elevator. You pushed on the button since Bucky was busy carrying you.

"Healing is my job. It's like if I asked you to not fight armed bad guys, it's your job."

"I fight the guys I can take and I know I'm stronger than them."

"Oh my God, you're so cocky." You chuckled.

"You should only heal the small injuries."

"What utility do I have if I'm just gonna do the same job as a band-aid?" You asked. "I saved Peter's life and you can say what you want about that but I'm proud of it. He's a good kid."

"Hey, I didn't say anything about that. I'm saying you need to refrain yourself and stop pushing the limits of your body."

"Well, I'm sorry we're not all super soldiers who have been injected with sup-" You stopped yourself, you were out of line. "Bucky, I-I'm really sorry I didn't mean any of it." He said nothing but then he let out a sigh.

"It's fine." He said and your eyes widened. "I say things I don't mean as well when I'm mad." You lowered your head. "And I'm proud of you for saving someone's life." You smiled slightly as you raised your head back up to look at him.

You finally reached your room and Bucky gently dropped you on your bed.

"You guys don't have to worry if I don't show up at all today, I'm so tired I could sleep for two days." You said as you got under your covers.

"You're not gonna change clothes?" He asked.

"I'm exhausted and I don't care." You said.

"I-I could help... if you want?" You started blushing. "I mean it's nothing I've ever seen..."

"A-Are we back together?" You asked. Bucky hesitated so he stayed silent. "If not then no." You said. "I think it's unfair to let you see me or touch me if you're still... mad at me."

"I understand." The winter soldier said.

"I-I miss you and I want you... in intimate ways again but please don't play with me if you... you're starting to hesitate about what you feel for me."

"[Y/N]..." He started but you interrupted him.

"I-If... one day you wake up and you realize... that you don't love me anymore... then you have to tell me." You said. "I love you and I'll keep fighting for you but please don't give me false hopes." You concluded. Bucky walked over to you and put a kiss on top of your head.

"Sleep well." He said before getting out of your room.

  
  


\---

  
  


You opened your eyes hours later. You stretched and yawned loudly before rolling on the side of your bed to check time on your nightstand, it was 3.10pm. Your old clothes were sticking to your body and it felt uncomfortable. You got out of bed and headed to the bathroom to take a nice and long shower. You still felt a bit tired but it wasn't as bad as this morning thankfully the warm water did wonders on your skin and muscles. You got out and wrapped your body in towels before laying on your bed to chill.

The thing with this tower is that you never knew what people were up to. It wasn't like living in a house and hearing a pot in the kitchen or somebody watching a movie in the living room. The tower was gigantic and had many floors. You could never know what people were doing.

You grabbed your phone and decided to text Bucky just to remind him that you were there and that you still intended on getting him back. You simply said that you had just awoken and that he was the first thing on your mind. Your intentions and gifts weren't big and it started to annoy you, if you wanted to get your boyfriend back you needed to do something special and that he would remember. Something that would really move him emotionally.

You sat up on your bed and decided to head downstairs to eat something then you would start brainstorming about what to do to please the winter soldier. You put on some clothes and then got out of your room.

"Hey, Tony." You greeted him as you found him in the kitchen. He was sitting in front of the counter and drinking a cup of coffee.

"Hey, sweetheart." Tony smiled at you. "Are you feeling better?"

"Hmm." You nodded with a smile.

"Come sit, I want to talk with you." He pulled a chair for you.

"Of course." You poured yourself a glass of juice then sat next to him.

"I wanted to thank you for what you did... for the kid." He said.

"You don't have to thank me." You said as you put your hand on his shoulder.

"No, really. I know how annoying it can be, working late at night... all night."

"It's my job and missions are always." You said. "And I don't regret it. Peter is a really nice boy and I'm happy I helped him." You smiled.

"Yeah, he is."

"You were worried about him huh?" You asked as you looked at Tony, you rememberd how panicked he looked when he came to get you. "He's okay now and he promised me he would be more careful in the future." You gently passed your hand on Tony's back. "Just please if you have a talk with him or if you already did... Don't scold him or stress him. I think he felt bad enough." You said.

"Yeah, don't worry. I know how the kid works." Tony smiled at you. "I wanted to talk about you."

"Me?" You asked.

"SHIELD pays you for your work but I want to thank you so tell me something that you want so I can give it to you and stop feeling guilty." He let out.

"Tony, you don't have to." You giggled slightly. "I didn't heal Peter like I was doing you a favor or something. He needed me and it's the reason I'm an Avengers." You smiled.

"Come on, there must be something." He said.

"Fine." You said. "I want Bucky."

"Alright. Write down a check and I'll sign it." He joked and you laughed.

"No, seriously. Help me please, I wanna do something for him but I have no idea."

"Do you want to give him a gift?" Tony asked.

"I-I guess?" You said nervously. "But I feel like I should do more, like take him on a date perhaps?"

"That's a good idea. Do you have a place in mind?" You shaked your head. "Well, what does Bucky like?"

"I-I don't know which makes me a terrible girlfriend. When we used to hang out we always did stuff that **I** liked..." You said as you lowered your head.

"Well you can search for fun stuff to do in the city, open a newspaper and check if there's a special event happening."

"Yeah, that's not a bad idea." You thought about it.

"You can still ask Steve as well, they grew up together after all. If you feel brave enough ask Bucky himself." Tony said to you as he raised one eyebrow.

"No, I want to keep it secret." You said. "But thank you so much, Tony!" You grinned.

"No problem. And tell me about it when you find what you want to do. A name like mine can get you some privileges." You rolled your eyes as you smiled.

"I'll keep it in mind." You said. "Did Peter and Happy leave?" You asked to change the subject.

"Yeah, he went back home. He has school and stuff." Tony replied.

"Yeah, I understand. He's awfully young, I hope he's going to be okay." You said before letting out a little sigh.

"I'm looking after him."

"I was hoping you'd say that." You smiled.

"Alright, I gotta go back to work. I hope to see you at dinner." Tony said as he got up.

"I'll be there." You promised. You took a deep breath when you were left alone in the kitchen, you were obviously thinking about Bucky again. This situation drove you crazy, you didn't know how Bucky dealt with it if he felt the same when you used to hang out with Loki. The pain was unbearable.

You thought stuff were going better because Bucky was somehow still looking after you but without the sweet words and intimate touching it just felt awkward as if he was forced to take care of you. You passed your hands on your face before deciding to do what Tony suggested and search for somewhere to go on a date with the winter soldier.

  
  


You headed to the living space, people usually hung out in there. It had a tv, radio and of course, newspapers. Thankfully there was one so you picked it up and then you went to sit on a couch before leafing through it. You decided to avoid movies because you couldn't talk during those but also museums because the actual expositions didn't seem interesting. You knew that Bucky liked space and stuff related to technology but unfortunately there was no events like that planned in the next few days.

The only thing that catched your attention was a game of baseball. You really hesitated. Maybe Bucky would find an interest in it but the crowd scared you and it was very noisy. Plus you didn't know any of the teams so would you really have a good time there? After all this date was to please the winter soldier _not you_ so you decided you would just have to grit your teeth for a few hours so he could have a good time. When you'll get him back you'd have all the time to go on dates where you both enjoy the same thing.

So you got up from the couch with your newspaper folded under your arm and decided to speak with Tony about your plan.

"It's me... Can I bother you?" You asked after knocking on the glass door of his lab and opening it.

"Sure, what's wrong?" Tony asked after raising his head from his work to look at you.

"I think I found something... for what we talked about earlier."

"Your date?" He smiled. "Tell me about it." You handed him the newspaper and pointed to the article that talked about the baseball game.

"Okay, if you want to go as siblings." He mocked.

"I know it's not romantic." You chuckled lowly. "Don't worry I got it covered up. I just wanna do something that'd be fun for him first. After the game we'll grab dessert at a Diner's." You said excitedly. "I made some research and I thought it'd make him happy. The waitresses wear roller skates and they play old music from the 20's to the 80's."

"You want to make him nostalgic?" Tony asked.

"I want him to feel something. I want him to remember that date forever." You said. "I don't wanna push too much into the cliché and make him watch a movie in black and white but I like the Diner's idea. One day he told me a story about him and Steve going there as teens." You bit onto your lower lip as you rememberd with a little smile. "Bucky had the most adorable smile when he talked about it, I'll never forget." You said to Tony.

"Well, that sounds very sweet." He commentated. "Leave the newspaper here, I'll see what I can do about the tickets for the game."

"Thank you so much!" You said as you wrapped your arms around Tony's neck and put a kiss against his cheek. "I'll leave you to work now, you're the best!" You waved before running out.

"Damn right, I am." Tony said as he proudly threw his fist in the air.

 


	49. Truth Game

"Hey." Bucky said to you after he closed the door of his room.

"O-Oh, hi." You said as you got out of yours.

"Did you just wake up?" He asked.

"No, I-I was already awake." You bit onto your lower lip. "I sent you a text when I did..." Bucky's eyes widened in surprise.

"Oh really? I didn't see it."

"I-It's okay... You didn't respond to the others as well so I just assumed you didn't care..." You said quietly as you both walked through the hallway to join the elevator.

"You're gonna stay through dinner this time?" He asked with a little smirk and you gasped.

"Depends..." You replied as you raised one eyebrow. He was just messing with you this time, you knew he wasn't being mean. You stayed silent in the elevator after the doors closed on you until Bucky spoke again.

"Do you feel better?" He asked. The last time the winter soldier's seen you was after he put you to bed when you looked like a corpse.

"Hmm." You nodded. "Slept well and took a warm shower. I feel perked up." You said with a slight smile.

"Good." He said. "I hope next time you remember that you almost died when you'll want to heal past the limits of your body." He said before stepping out of the elevator.

"This again?" You followed him in the hallway that guided to the dining room. "I didn't almost die, I was just... drained." You said.

"And what do you think would've happened to you after you use all your energy, genius?" He turned his head to look at you.

"Oh God, what's happening again?" Tony asked as he and all the Avengers members raised their heads when they heard voices becoming louder as you and Bucky approached the kitchen.

"I am fine!" You said louder than you intended to. You both stepped inside the kitchen while your teammates were looking at you arguing.

"Is everything... okay?" Steve dared to ask.

"YES!" You and the winter soldier replied at the same time with frustration.

"Ugh, you're cutting my appetite." You said to Bucky.

"You're not going anywhere, sit down!" He ordered you as he sat down and pulled a chair for you next to him. You sat and crossed your arms on your chest.

"Okay..." Nat said as she raised her eyebrows. "Well, let's try to have a nice dinner."

"What do you think you're doing?" You asked Bucky as he picked your plate and started putting food in it.

"You're not leaving this table until you finish eating." He said before putting your plate back in front of you.

"I'm not your child and I don't need your help!" You defended yourself.

"Wouldn't want you passing out again, I can't spend my time carrying you back in your room." He said as he filled his plate.

"Nobody asked you to." You replied. The Avengers members looked at each other in awkwardness as you and Bucky kept fighting in front of them.

"Eat before I feed you myself."

"Are you gonna force food in my throat?" You asked.

"Don't test me, [Y/N]."

"Bite me."

"You'd love that." He replied.

"Huh hum." Steve coughed. You huffed deeply as you turned your head the other way to avoid looking at Bucky.

"Eat." The winter soldier provoked you again as he glanced in your direction and noticed you didn't touch your plate.

"You're not my dad!" You yelled at him.

"Enough!" Oh, that's the first time you heard Bruce raise his voice and it intimidated you so much you froze on your spot. "Stop acting like children, you both are adults!" He scolded you and Bucky.

"Sorry..." You said quietly. You elbowed Bucky in the side when he remained silent.

"Sorry, as well." He let out. Suddenly you heard Nat and Thor let out a chuckle and you couldn't help your lips curving into a smile too. The situation was indeed funny.

"You two love each so much." Nat said and you rolled your eyes as a small blush had crept on your cheeks. Finally you picked up your fork and started eating. Bucky was relieved next to you. "So, I want to suggest to you all a little activity for the night..." She started.

"Oh, please, just don't tell me we're going out again, I'm tired." You said.

"You're what?" Bucky asked as he turned his head to look at you. "I thought you said you were fine!" You facepalmed. "No activity for you, you're going to bed."

"Buck!" Steve stopped him.

"First of all, let me finish." Nat said before you started arguing with Bucky again. "No, we're not going out."

"Oh..." You let out a bit embarrassed. "Sorry."

"I thought we could replay a little game of truth or dare but... no dares. Only the truth." She raised one eyebrow as she smirked.

"Why do I feel like this is a trap..." You said.

"Because it is." Bucky replied. You both knew this game was only to get you and Bucky to talk your feelings out.

"Come on..." She encouraged. "And everyone gets to ask questions to whoever they want." She added.

"Well, I have nothing better to do and I'm **not** spending my night in my room." You said as you glared at Bucky.

"If she's in I gotta be there as well but I'm pretty sure it's gonna end up with her passing out." The winter soldier mocked.

"I can't stand you." You said to him.

"Hey, keep it for the game." Nat said to you. "Alright, same room as usual at-" She looked at the time. "9pm? It's in 2 hours." Everyone agreed and then finally the dinner ended in a normal way with no more bickering between you and Bucky.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Are you nervous?" Bucky asked with a slight grin.

"Shut up." You replied as you got out of the elevator.

"Finally, you're here." Nat said. Everyone was already here, scattered around in the living space, some sitting on the couches and others on the carpet.

"Yeah, well, I hesitated to come." You said truthfully.

"Why do you both always arrive at the same time?" Tony asked you and the winter soldier.

"We live on the same floor??" You reminded him.

"Uh huh..." Tony raised one eyebrow.

"Well anyway, come sit down." Bruce welcomed you both. You sat next to him on the couch and Bucky went next to Steve and Nat.

"Welp, who starts?" You asked as you all remained silent.

"Me." Bucky said and it surprised everyone. "Why did you say Loki's name?" Nat took a sip of her drink as she lowered her head and everyone looked uncomfortable.

"Wh-" You threw your hands up in the air after you gasped. "Really?" You asked.

"Choose your words carefully, [Y/N]." Bucky said to you and you stared at him in disbelief.

"I don't know! For the 100th time!" You yelled in frustration. "My brain froze, I don't know what made me say his name! I was lost in my thoughts and you kissed my neck at the moment I was thinking about him. I'm pretty sure if I was thinking of the President it's his name I would've said!" You re-explained and to everybody this time. You let out a long exasperated sigh as you backed up on your seat hoping the couch would swallow you whole.

"I have a question as well, who believes [Y/N]'s explanation?" Nat asked. "And remember, only the truth." She reminded everyone. You smiled in relief when you saw all of them raise their hands except Bucky of course.

"C'mon, dude." Steve said to his best friend. Bucky sighed deeply but he remained silent.

"Okay..." Nat said. "Well, now that you know us all better-" She said as she looked at you. "Besides Bucky, who is your favorite among us?" She grinned.

"I-I can't answer that!" You replied in panic.

"Oh, you have to." Tony said with an amused grin. You looked at each one of them with a sad face.

"How do you want me to answer, you..." You bit onto your lower lip as you felt you were about to cry again. "You guys are my first real friends and my real family." You said as tears rolled down your cheeks. You breathed deeply to calm down. "Tony is the dad I've never had, Bruce is my cool uncle, Steve and Nat are my older siblings and Thor is my best friend." You wiped your tears with your fingers and Bruce gently patted his hand on your back.

"Your almost brother-in-law." Thor joked.

"Oh c'mon-" You giggled slightly. "Not the time and touchy subject." You said. You raised your head and noticed they had small tears in their eyes too and it just made you cry harder.

"[Y/N], you're a good person and you didn't deserve any of the suffering you went through in your childhood." Steve said to you. You wanted to tell them how much you loved each one of them and how thankful you were for everything they gave you and made you discover but you didn't want the mood to be more depressing than it already was.

"Anybody got a tissue please?" You asked in a higher voice than normal. Thor got up and handed you a box that rested on a small table.

"Here."

"Thank you." You said as you grabbed one and wiped your tears.

"I don't know about y'all but that answer didn't satisfy me." Tony joked to ease the mood and you all let out a litte laugh. Bucky was the only one who kept silent but you ignored him, you were exhausted by all the fighting.

"I have a question." You announced. "Nat and Steve... Why aren't you both dating?" You asked. The captain started blushing but the redhaired woman chuckled.

"No, we're not like that." She said. "You could say it's platonic though. We're best friends, siblings and we love each other but not in a romantic way." She explained.

"Yeah..." He started. "Our friendship is just so deep that any romance is not possible." Steve said.

"It's not gonna end up in a beautiful love story. If we tried something it's just gonna destroy our friendship." Nat concluded.

"Okay." You accepted. "That's a beautiful answer, I think." You smiled. Steve noticed Bucky stayed silent because he probably had a lot of doubts about you but his best friend was too reserved to ask more questions so the captain decided to go for it, Bucky would owe him though.

"Thor, I have a question for you." Steve started. You don't know why but suddenly you had a bad feeling.

"I'm listening." The God of thunder said.

"Do you have feelings for [Y/N]?" Steve asked and your eyes widened as a cold chill went down your spine. Bucky straightened himself on his seat as well, he suddenly got very interested in the game.

"And he means romantic ones." Nat added.

"Are you guys crazy?" You asked the two of them.

"Shh, [Y/N]." Tony shushed you as he got interested as well.

"No, I do not." Thor replied truthfully and you let out a sigh of relief. Steve and Bucky crossed eyes but said nothing.

"I got a question too." You said in hopes to change subject. "Why were you so mean to me on my first day?" You asked Thor.

"I was testing you." The Asgardian replied.

"Okay..." You replied. "Well, that was unnecessarily rude." You added with a little smile meaning there was no hard feelings.

"Wait, I remember something." Steve said. "Did you say the truth on your first day when I asked you if you had eaten and you said yes?" You glanced at Bucky and found him looking at you already.

"No, I lied back then." You replied truthfully.

"Why?" Bruce asked. You took a deep breath.

"As you all know... or guessed... I have a problem with my appearance and when Steve told me I could have dinner with Bucky there was no way I could've accepted that."

"You don't have to tell them." Bucky suddenly spoke.

"It's fine, I trust everyone here now." You said. "I already talked about it with Bucky." You explained to them. "Eating in front of other people used to be one of my biggest fears and... it still is sometimes."

"But... you ate with us." Thor rememberd.

"Yes and only if Bucky was around. H-He made me feel safe." You said as you raised your head to look at him. "I'm not gonna enter into the details but he did something nice for me on my first day." You said. Bucky looked at you and smiled slightly.

"I'm sorry I had no idea." Steve said.

"No, please don't apologize." You said to the captain. "You were always kind to me and I really appreciated it, even to this day when you ask to fill my plate." You said with a small smile and tears in corner of your eyes. "You all helped me in so many ways and you have no idea." You concluded.

"This game is so depressing." Tony commentated.

"Hey!" Steve threw at him.

"No, he's right." You giggled slightly.

"Alright, let's get down on the real business." Nat said. "[Y/N], what's something that you hate about Bucky?" She asked you with a raised brow. You huffed in annoyance.

"He gets really mean when he's hurt or angry." You said. "And even if he doesn't mean what he says his words resonate in my head and I can't forget them."

"Alright. What about you Bucky, what do you hate about [Y/N]?" She asked him.

"Everything that's happened between her and Loki." He replied.

"I meant as in personality, not something that she did."

"I know what you meant." Bucky replied. "There's just nothing to hate." He said and you started blushing slightly. "She's kind, generous, takes care of others even if it costs her own well-being, there's not an ounce of evilness in her." You bit onto your lower lip. "Despite everything that's happened to her she still shines the brightest wherever she goes and illuminate any room." You sniffled as you wiped your tears. It hurt to hear him say beautiful things like that about you. If he thought all these things about you why weren't you and him back together?? It drove you crazy, you cried tears of frustration.

"[Y/N], you're okay?" Bruce asked you.

"No." You said as you got up and walked towards the balcony to go out and breathe a bit of fresh air.

"Alright, everyone take a break." Nat announced. "We'll be back." She said before following you outside.

You walked to the edge and took a deep breath as you stared forward. The view as always was beautiful but you weren't in the mood. You were heartbroken. The situation was unbearable and you didn't have the strength to support it anymore.

"Honey, are you okay?" Nat asked as she stood next to you and put a hand on your shoulder.

"I can't do it. I'm not patient, I'm not strong." You said. "If he thinks so nicely of me why doesn't he want us to get back together? I'm convinced it has nothing to do with Loki anymore, it's just an excuse. The truth is that he doesn't love me anymore." You said as tears blurred your vision. You closed your eyes and inhaled deeply to calm down.

"I'll talk to him." She said to reassure you.

"It's useless."

"No, it's not. He still cares deeply about you and when you're not looking at him he's looking at you. I don't know why he's acting like he does but we'll figure it out." She smiled at you. "I'm gonna tell you something that you probably didn't know until now because you've never been in a relationship before but-" She made you look at her. "Boys are stupid." You let out a small chuckle. "It's gonna get better, I promise you." You smiled sadly at her.

"Thanks." You said quietly.

"I'll leave you a few more minutes to calm down, I'll go talk to Bucky with Steve." She said before stepping back and leaving you alone on the balcony.

  
  


"Why did she start crying?" Bucky asked Nat after she found he and Steve in a corner of the living space.

"You are so stupid." She rolled her eyes. "What do you think? She's fed up with the arguing and fighting."

"But I was complimenting her..." The winter soldier truly didn't understand what was going on.

"You say nice things to her but you don't want to get back with her when you're clearly still in love. What are you playing Bucky, what's your angle?" She asked. He huffed loudly.

"I just can't stop thinking about her and- the other one." He said as he raised his eyes to the sky.

"She loves you!" Nat said quietly but with anger to him.

"Fine. I know, okay? I believe her explanation."

"Thank you!" She said. "Finally."

"But even if everything she said was true I can't get those images out of my head."

"What do you want her to do, then?" Steve asked. "I just don't think she can heal those memories away from your mind."

"I can't forget because everyone including her just keep reminding me of it." He said with frustration. "I just want you all to leave me alone." Bucky said before walking out of the living space.

"Welp, I don't think [Y/N] wants to keep playing the game anyway." Nat said to Steve.

"At least he said he knows she doesn't love Loki." Steve said.

"Yeah, at least that."

"I'm gonna warn the others we're done."

"Yeah, I'll tell [Y/N]."

  
  


You bid goodnight to everybody and then you took the elevator to retreat to your room. Even if you had slept during the day you still felt drained. You were probably going to feel like this for two more days, Peter's injuries were serious and it took you a lot to heal him.

You walked through your hallway to reach your room and then you closed the door behind you after you stepped in. Twenty seconds later there was a knock at your door.

"Bucky?" You asked in confusion.

"I heard your door close." He said.

"W-What did you need?" You asked.

"Can I come in?" You let out a sigh and moved out of the way to let him in. "Sit." He patted a spot on the edge of your bed next to him after he sat as well.

"Okay." You said and then you sat next to him.

"I thought about what you said since we came back-" Bucky started. "I'm a bad communicator when I'm in a bad mood but I thought you'd need to hear it so-" He took a deep breath. "I forgive you." Your eyes widened in suprise.

"W-What?" You asked in disbelief.

"I believe in the explanations you gave to me and I believe you when you say you don't love Loki." He said.

"W-Why the sudden change?" You asked.

"I had doubts that you and other people cleared and also since we fought- And I did push you on purpose sometimes, you never threatened me to go back to him." He said.

"Didn't even cross my mind." You said. He smiled slightly.

"Not an ounce of evilness in you, huh?" You raised your head to look at him.

"D-Does that mean...-"

"Not yet." He replied. "I forgive you and I know you don't love him but it doesn't stop me from thinking about you and him." Bucky explained.

"I-I'll erase those memories, Bucky." You said as you boldly grabbed his hand. "There is only you, no one else." You brought his hand to your lips and kissed the back of it. "I love you." You said as you looked into his eyes.

Bucky licked his lips before he leaned onto you and kissed you softly. You were so surprised you didn't move. He got up and put another kiss on top of your head before he grabbed your doorknob.

"Goodnight, doll." The winter soldier smiled at you and left your room.

 


	50. Finally Yours Again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for +300 kudos and +9000 hits!

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. announced you wanted to see me." You said as you entered Tony's lab.

"Ah, [Y/N]. Yes, come in." You closed the door and walked to him.

"What's up?" You asked.

"I got your tickets." Tony said as he held them up in his hand.

"Oh my God!" Your eyes widened. "Thank you so much!" You beamed with happiness.

"You got the best seats and also a VIP entree if you wanna salute the players."

"Tony, you're so powerful." You complimented him. "God, I hope Bucky accepts." You said.

"You didn't tell him yet?"

"No, I was waiting on the tickets." You sat down on a chair. "I'm so nervous."

"Don't be, I'm sure he'll accept." Tony reassured you.

"Well, I guess I'm about to find out." You said with a little smile. "I'm gonna search for him now, the game is in two days. I hope he has nothing planned."

"Good luck."

"Thank you again, you're really the best!" You said before leaving the lab.

  
  


It was currently 11am, you had breakfast with everyone in the morning and for once you and Bucky didn't argue. You didn't talk about last night either though but no news meant good news right?

You stood silently in the elevator for a few seconds, you had no idea where Bucky could be. You decided to check the training room but it was desert. The living space? As well. It was almost lunch time but food was being prepared at the moment so he couldn't be in the kitchen. Maybe he was just in his room after all.

You clicked on the button to your floor and after you stepped out of the lift you walked through the hallway to reach his room. You knocked on his door.

"Coming." You heard him say. You bit onto your lower lip in stress.

"Hey, sorry to both-" You got interrupted as your jaw dropped at the sight in front of you.

"Figured it would be you." Bucky smirked slightly. He had just came out of the shower and his body and hair were still wet but what highly disturbed you was the comeback of his goddamn towel hung around his hips.

"I-I..." You stuttered and it made Bucky chuckle, he didn't miss the way your eyes wandered on his body. You gulped before regaining your senses and pretend you were absolutely not distracted by his abs and muscled arms. God did you miss this as well.

"Did you need something?" He asked, amused by the situation.

"Yes. You, in fact." You said as you looked him in the eyes this time. Bucky moved out of the way and let you in his room. "D-Do you mind-" You gestured his naked body.

"Oh, of course." He said. "Give me a minute." He went to the bathroom and you thought he was just going to change in there but when he stepped out... It was without his towel.

"BUCK!" You gasped loudly at the sight of his- _**mini him**_ and then turned around as you covered your eyes. Your face was as red as a beet, you couldn't believe he really just did this. You heard him laugh behind you.

"You should've seen your face." He chuckled.

"You do know that this counts as assault right?"

"Are you gonna sue me?" He asked and you rolled your eyes.

"Are you finally decent now?" You asked as you ignored his little game. You heard him open his closet and put on clothes.

"Yeah." You turned around to face him. "So, what did you need me for?"

"Despite whatever you just pulled at the moment... I wanted to ask you on a date." You let out with a little smile.

"Really?" He looked surprised but in a pleasant way.

"Hmm." You nodded before showing him the tickets. "It's for a baseball game." You said.

"I thought you hated sports." He said with an amused smile on his face as he looked at the tickets.

"I do but this date is for me to get you back not the inverse. We can do something I like when we're back together and we go on our many other dates." You said confidently. "So what do you say?" You asked as you approached him.

"Alright, I accept to go on a date with you." Bucky said as he looked into your eyes. You were relieved and very happy.

"Good." You smiled. "Also I hope you don't mind... driving us there since I don't have a license." You said. "I could've asked Tony for a driver but I thought it wouldn't be very romantic." You joked.

"Yeah, I don't mind." He replied.

"Okay, cool." You said. "Well, I uh... I'm gonna go now." You had your hand on the doorknob but suddenly you stopped and turned back to him. "You... felt it too right?" You asked.

"What are you talking about?" Bucky asked with a little side smile.

"You did... That's why you opened your door to me almost naked. Because you know how you make me feel despite everything." You explained. Bucky approached you until he had you caged between his body and his door and you let him. "You did it to provoke me... To allure me..." You whispered as he put a finger under your chin and raised your head to make you look him in the eyes. "Say it." You said so quietly he could've missed it. Bucky looked at you with half lidded eyes and a smirk on his face.

"I felt that... spark when we kissed." The winter soldier finally admitted. Your lips curved into a smile.

"Me too." You confessed. "Stop fighting it, you know you and I are meant to be together." You lowered your eyes to his full and warm lips that you craved so much. Bucky moved his head next to yours and whispered to your ear.

"We'll see at the date." Then he moved off you and you let out a quiet but frustrated sigh. "Let's head downstairs, it's lunchtime." He said to you.

"I'm craving something else." You let out and Bucky laughed. He opened the door and you walked out followed by him. "You know I'm gonna make you regret this, right?" You teased. "When we're back together and you're gonna be sooo needy because you love touching me and I'm gonna leave you frustrated."

"I love how you're so convinced we're gonna get back together." He smirked.

"If you didn't want to be with me you wouldn't have pulled what you did in your room just now." You raised one eyebrow.

"Let's pretend you're right." Bucky said. "You have never been able to say no to me since you had a taste of what I could do to you." He looked at you and you blushed.

"W-Well, we'll eventually find out." You said as you stepped out of the elevator. "Hey!" You greeted everyone happily as you stepped inside the dining room.

"Someone looks happy." Nat noticed with a smile.

"Yeah and she's not the only one..." Tony saw Bucky was smiling as well.

"I'm starving, what are we having?" You asked and all the Avengers' eyes widened. Bucky sat next to you and you looked at him with a smile.

"Well, it's good to hear you say that." Steve commentated. "It's lasagna today."

"Oh, I love Italian." You said and the captain smiled at you. You crossed eyes with Tony and you gestured him an OK sign to let him know Bucky accepted the date.

"How are you since the emergency mission?" Bruce asked you.

"I'm good, really." You said truthfully. "Still drained but it's gonna be fine soon. It's hard to explain honestly." You tried to think of an exemple to give them so they could understand how you felt. "Like I can move and walk you know, I'm pretty sure I could run too but if I have to use my powers for big wounds I know I'm not gonna be able to."

"Like if you had two energy bars in a video game, one is for your health and the other is for energy?" Tony asked.

"Exactly!" You let out. "My health is fine but will be compromised if I have to redo what I did to Peter." You explained. "The health bar is full but the energy one still needs time."

"All I'm hearing is that you need to rest." Bucky said.

"Don't start." You turned to him. He raised his hands in surrender and you smiled at each other. "By the way I'm sorry I didn't ask earlier but how are you Thor? You stayed with me all night too." You said as you looked at him.

"Don't worry about me, I'm used to it. But thank you for asking." The Asgardian said.

"You haven't replied." You reminded him.

"I'm fine." He smiled at you.

"Okay, I'm glad to hear that."

"Well, what are we waiting for? Let's dig in." Nat said.

"Steve?" You called out.

"Yes?" He replied, the captain looked confused.

"Will you fill my plate, please?" You asked.

"It would be my pleasure." Steve smiled at you and took your plate to put you a nice slice of homemade lasagna on it.

"Thank you."

"Don't enter his weird game." Nat said to you. "If you encourage him he'll keep babying you." She joked.

You all finally started digging into your foods and conversed with each other but you had other plans, you wanted to keep flirting with the winter soldier. Your date was in two days, you couldn't wait that long to be with him.

"Bucky." You whispered to him so only he could hear.

"What?" He asked.

"Can you please feed me?" His eyes widened.

"You want me to what now?"

"I'm very tired, I feel weak." That was a lie but you knew he worried about your condition, you didn't even feel bad about using that as an excuse.

"I'm not doing that." He said. You discreetly turned your chair towards him and made a sad face.

"Please, don't make me ask someone else." He raised his head instantly. There was no way in hell someone else was gonna feed you besides him, he won't allow it. Bucky sighed deeply before turning his chair towards you as well and then he picked your fork to feed you with it.

"Open up." He said to you.

"Hmmm..." You moaned quietly so only he could hear. The others were far too busy about their own conversations or food to notice you and the winter soldier in the corner doing whatever.

"I take back what I said, there is some evilness in you." Bucky smirked.

"The date is in 2 days, just think about it..." You raised one eyebrow. You got even closer and discreetly put your hand on his thigh under the table. "What do you say?" You asked him.

"[Y/N], no. And we can't get out of here." He said.

"I can pretend to faint and you take me upstairs." You whispered to his ear before discreetly bringing the hand that was on his thigh a bit higher.

"You'd go that far?" He chuckled.

"I want you, Bucky." You said. "Ask me if I'm okay and say it loud enough to catch their attention." You moved your chair back to its original place, you were too close to the winter soldier. Bucky cleared his throat before speaking.

"[Y/N], are you okay??" He asked and... it worked. Everyone turned their heads towards you and now it was your time to play.

"N-Not really... I-I think I'm gonna go lay down." You pretended to get up and then you fell back onto your chair.

"Should we call a doctor?" Steve asked in worry.

"No!" You said louder than you intended to and Bucky had to suppress a smile.

"I'm gonna bring her to her room." He told the others. "I told you you needed to rest." Bucky pretended to argue again.

"Don't start an argument now." Tony said to him. The winter soldier got up and carried you out of the room. When the elevator doors closed on you he put you back on your feet and you both started laughing.

"You should become an actress." He joked.

"I started digging this since the mission when I had to retreat that report from the undercover agent." You chuckled. You stopped laughing and then you stared into each other's eyes for a little while until you approached him. You gently pushed Bucky against the elevator wall with your palms pressed against his chest but suddenly he seized your wrists in his hands. You bit onto your lower lip never breaking eye contact with him. "What are you waiting for to kiss me?" You asked him in a quiet tone.

Bucky leaned on you and catched your lips with his. You closed your eyes and hummed pleasantly against the kiss, at long last, he was finally yours again. He broke the kiss but you stood on your tip toes and kissed him again. What was a soft kiss at first turned into something more bestial where your teeth collided and your tongues fought for dominance. Bucky sucked onto your lower lip as you ran your hands on him until you slipped them under his shirt and caressed his warm skin.

The elevator doors opened on your floor, Bucky leaned on you and put his hand under one of your knees.

"Jump on me." He breathed against your mouth.

"What?" You asked in confusion.

"Just do it. And spread your thighs." You did as he said and Bucky catched you against him. You wrapped your arms around his neck and your legs around his hips while he put his hands under your clothed butt to support your weight on him. He got into his room and then pushed you against the door to close it. "Hnng!" He groaned when you pulled on his hair and made him raise his head. You ran your tongue on the side of his neck and kissed his skin there.

"No visible marks." You said to him. Bucky harshly moved his hips against yours and you let out a moan. The friction felt amazing. "Bucky..." You said his name.

"No plays? No games?" He asked you with a smirk. You shaked your head. "What do you want?"

"Please just-" You bit onto your lower lip.

"Against this door?" He asked. You nodded. "Say you want me."

"I want you Bucky, please." You begged him.

"Be more explicit." You felt his bulge rub against your clothed crotch and it drove you crazy.

"Pleas- Ahh!" Another harsh movement of his hips against yours. "Do me." You said.

"Say it again." Bucky smirked. "Say it how I want to hear it and I'll give it to you." You gulped as you blushed.

"Fuck me until I can't walk." You finally let out but God were you embarrassed. Bucky chuckled next to your head before getting serious. He pulled on the material of your leggings with his hands and with his natural strength and the one combined with his metal hand he ripped through your pants, your panties were next. Your eyes widened. "I liked those!" You said to him.

"I'll buy you new ones." He promised. Bucky caged you between the door and his body while one of his hands went between your bodies to unbuckle the belt of his pants and unbutton them. Finally he lowered them along with his underwear, he grabbed his dick and rubbed it between your slit feeling how wet you were for him. "You're soaked, doll." Bucky smirked.

"Shut up and put it in already." You ordered him. He found your entrance and slowly he started pushing himself inside of you. "Ohhhh f-fuck..!" You let out as your arms wrapped tighter around his neck.

"You're so fucking tight." He commentated.

"It's you who's too big!" You argued. Bucky held onto your buttcheeks and pushed himself deeper. "F-Fuck! I feel like I'm being split up." You cursed.

"You feel amazing, you're so warm, wet and soft-"

"Please shut up, stop talking." You said as you blushed harder. He started pulling out but suddenly he went right back in and you gasped loudly. "Bucky..!"

"I forgot how good it felt being inside of you." He smirked. The winter soldier thrusted his hips fast against yours, earning loud moans from you everytime he pushed in.

"Oh fuck, fuck, FUCK!" You cursed. You could feel the door shake on your back as he pounded hard inside of you. "P-Please..!"

"Do you feel good?" Bucky asked as he panted.

"Yes!" You confirmed louder in pleasure. "Please kiss me." You asked him and he did. He catched your lips and kissed you passionately as he fucked you senseless. The winter soldier sucked each one of the sounds you released against his mouth, he grabbed your hips and pushed you harder against him. "Please, slower! Go slower!"

"I don't think so, you're loving this rhythm." He smirked. "You're- hhhng... squeezing me tighter and you're leaking." Bucky groaned, he was getting closer. "Are you there?"

"N-Not yet..." You replied.

"Rub yourself." He said to you.

"W-What?"

"I would've done it but my hands are busy." He said as he gave your hips a small squeeze with his hands. "Please, I want to see you do it." You bit onto your lower lip before letting go of his neck with one arm and then you brought your hand between your bodies.

"Don't s-stare..." You said as you saw him glance down the whole time waiting for you to rub yourself.

"Please, doll. I'm going slower too." He said and it was true. Bucky moved slower inside of you so he could see between your bodies.

"Hhhaan..." You whined as you finally touched your aching clit. It was warm, swollen and throbbing, needing to be taken care of.

"Like that, doll." Bucky said quietly. "Circle it with your finger, don't touch it yet." His dirty talk was starting to make you hot and bothered, you loved his praises. "You're doing good... Hnng... I can feel you around me. You're loving it." He said with a grin.

"T-Tell me more... What to do..." You asked him as you blushed. Bucky smiled before leaning on you and kissing your cheek.

"Circle it with your finger, remember what I used to do with my tongue." You gulped. "When you feel it, when you want to start feeling good lay two or three finger flat on it and move them from right to left, without stopping."

"B-Bucky..." You moaned as you closed your eyes and rubbed yourself.

"Just like that, it's so pretty, you're so beautiful." He praised you as he stared down. "I'm gonna move again, okay? When you feel like you're close rub yourself faster." He pushed you harder against the door as he thrusted inside of you.

"I-I'm close." You said.

"You're doing amazing. I'm close too." Bucky said. "Rub yourself as fast as you can, I promise you you won't be able to walk when I'm done with you." He smirked. You wanted to reach your orgasm so badly you did everything he told you to. You clinged on him with one arm wrapped around his neck while your other was between your bodies rubbing your clit very quickly.

"B-Bucky!" You moaned his name loudly as he pounded hard and fast inside of you until you both finally came. He buried his head in the crook of your neck as he released himself in you then you heard him pant against your skin. "D-Don't let me go, I can't feel my thighs." You warned him.

 


	51. Canceled

Bucky carried you to his bed before he gently dropped you on it. He pulled out of you and put his pants back on before going to the bathroom. You were too tired to care about whatever he was doing but you saw him come back and kneel in front of you in the bed, your brows furrowed in confusion.

"What are you doing?" You asked.

"Cleaning you up." He spread your thighs and passed a wet washcloth on your parts.

"As sweet as this is it's useless, I'm gonna take a shower." You said. "And I bet it's just an excuse to stare at my-" You blushed. "You know..."

"Indeed is." He smiled in a teasing way.

"Buck!" You grabbed one of his pillows and threw it on him but he catched it with his metal hand.

"You're so pretty." He said but what bothered you was that he looked like he was speaking to your crotch.

"Bucky, you're weird." You let out and he laughed.

"Next time I'm gonna kiss it first." Your eyes widened.

"Next time?" You asked with a small smile. "S-So... We're-"

"We are." Bucky replied as he leaned on you and catched your lips for a deep kiss. You wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him back.

"I love you so much, Bucky!" You said happily as you left several small kisses everywhere on his face. He grabbed your hand and put a kiss inside your palm.

"I love you too, doll. I can't stay away from you." He said and your heart beat so fast inside your chest you wanted to scream. "Are you crying?" The winter soldier asked with a small smile.

"N-No..." You sniffled and looked the other way.

"Yes, you are." He let out a little laugh as he laid next to you. "Come here." You snuggled against him and he wrapped his arms around you.

"I-I'm really sorry for... hurting you." You said as you held tightly on him. "It's the last thing I want."

"Shh." Bucky put a kiss on top of your head. "I don't wanna talk or think about it anymore."

"Hold my hand." You asked him in a soft voice. He smiled before tangling his fingers with yours. "Can we... keep this secret for a little while?" You asked.

"You read my mind, doll."

"You think we should too?" You asked in surprise. "I thought you'd want to talk about it."

"As much I like everyone in this tower I don't want people meddling between us, at least not for a little while."

"I agree... though I feel bad hiding it from Nat." You said. "I'm glad I have you back." You turned to lay on your stomach and looked at him lovingly.

"I missed you too." Bucky smiled. "The only joy I got during our fights was that I got to see that nose scrunch many times." He teased as he poked it with his finger. You rolled your eyes.

"I'm gonna take a shower." You said before moving. "Oww..." You winced. "Okay, I will in a few minutes." You stopped moving.

"Your thighs?" He asked.

"E-Everywhere down..." You replied. "I feel sore, you... ravaged me." You let out with a blush.

"Stop talking like that, I wanna do you again." Bucky smirked.

"Oh God, please don't." You pleaded.

"Want me to carry you in the shower?" He asked. "I could use one too." You looked at him with a smile.

"We will." You teased. "I want to make it special. After the date we'll take a bath together." You promised him.

"You're so vile." He said as he passed his hand on your cheek and caressed it.

"It's just 2 days." You said.

" _ **You**_ couldn't wait 2 days before _this_." Bucky said as he raised one eyebrow.

"That's on you, you're the one who provoked me before lunch with your sexy and wet body that I, by the way, really missed since our days at the cabin." You explained.

"I know, I saw you stare." You blushed profusely.

"Y-You got no room to talk when you call me pretty while literally staring between my legs."

"Let me look again-"

"Buck!" You lightly hit him with your hand. "And you owe me a pair of leggings and panties."

"Fine but I get to choose them." You rolled your eyes.

"Deal." You let out. "Ok, I'm going back to my room now. I'm afraid someone will come check on me after our little act in the dining room earlier."

"Do you need help?" Bucky asked.

"I have to stand on my own." You said. You painfully moved towards the edge of the bed and then you slowly stood up, your legs wobbled a bit but you were still standing. You grabbed the cloth the winter soldier cleaned you with earlier and hid your exposed part to walk in the hallway. Bucky had ripped a huge hole in your leggins and your panties were in pieces.

"See you later, doll." Bucky threw at you playfully as he grinned in a satisfied way. You deserved this pain and humilitation, you're the one who convinced him to have sex.

"Yeah, bye." You replied before grabbing his doorknob and leaving his room.

  
  


\---

  
  


For two days you and Bucky were very discreet and you didn't sleep together again. You both had decided to wait until the date to make your reunion better. The other Avengers members were glad your fighting calmed down but if only they knew that you both stopped arguing simply because you were a couple again.

You both kept your promise and didn't tell anyone you were back together. You tried to avoid being in the same room as well, Bucky spent his days in the training room and you had rediscovered the library. You avoided the place until now to be honest because it brought back memories.

You also didn't go out, since you were still drained you used that excuse to go to sleep early. The others understood and left you alone. When Nat asked how you were feeling you told her you were bummed about Bucky and she left you alone.

At long last the day of the date came, you woke up happy because you were certain you were going to have a great day. It was unfortunate how wrong you were but you had no idea at that time.

"Good morning, everybody!" You beamed as you entered the kitchen for breakfast.

"Hey, [Y/N]." Nat greeted you.

"How are you?" Bruce asked.

"I'm good." You smiled. "I got a date tonight." You said happily.

"What? With who?" Steve asked you.

"Bucky." You said obviously. "Where is he by the way?" You asked as you looked around the dining table. Thor wasn't here for breakfast but you were used to that, though Bucky was missing as well.

"Uh..." Tony lowered his head.

"[Y/N], he went on a mission. He won't be back until after tomorrow at best." Steve explained to you.

"Wh-" You dropped on a chair, you were baffled.

"He didn't tell you?" Nat asked.

"Are you guys pulling my leg here?" You couldn't believe it. I mean sure a mission could happen at any moment but apparently it was planned, everyone knew about it except you... Why didn't Bucky warn you?

"I'm afraid we're not." Bruce said.

"He left very early this morning, SHIELD requested Bucky and Sam on a mission." Steve explained to you.

"Why didn't he say anything to me?" You asked in a quiet voice as you stared blankly at the table.

"I don't know [Y/N], he learned about it yesterday." The captain said. "Maybe he just didn't think about it." You sighed deeply.

"And he comes back in 2 days?" You asked.

"At best." Steve replied. You got up to leave, those bad news had cut your appetite. "Wh- Where are you going?" The super soldier worried.

"Back to bed since I have nothing to do." You said before walking out. On your way to the elevator you felt like crying. You were so excited about the date, you wanted to be with him outside even if you hated baseball you- "Huh." You let out a dry chuckle. The baseball game... Your tickets were useless now, it was only for tonight and Bucky was away. You weren't going to go on your own, you hated sports.

  
  


One hour later Nat came in your room to check on you.

"How are you?" She asked. You rolled your eyes and sighed deeply as an answer. "You know how it is with our job." She said to you.

"I know. I'm just-" You sat on your bed, you were laying on it until now. "We live on the same floor, he could've told me." You rememberd the others didn't know about your reconciliation. "I-I mean even if we stopped arguing and he's still mad at m-"

"Oh, enough with that." Nat cut you. "You can fool the others but not me."

"W-What..?" You asked. Oh shit.

"I know you both are back together." She revealed. "But nice act in the kitchen the other day." She smiled at you.

"We were that bad?" You asked with a small smile as well.

"Not really. I was actually fooled as well so after Bucky and you disappeard and he didn't come back I thought you were fighting again so I went to your floor to check on you."

"Oh, God." You let out as your eyes widened.

"I thought you were fighting because of how hard that door banged-"

"NAT!" You blushed profusely. "Oh my God, that's so embarrassing." You hid your face with your hands.

"Be thankful I was on my own, Steve wanted to check on Bucky as well." She chuckled. "C'mon, it's fine. I'm glad you both are back together." You breathed deeply.

"Thanks." You smiled shyly but then your expression changed. "Ugh, I feel like everytime we take a step forward we take two more backward right after."

"He's gonna come back soon, be patient."

"I've been a whole lot of patient recently." You said before getting up and picking up your tickets that you were supposed to use with Bucky. "Take these. It's for a baseball game, for our date you know. You can go with Steve if you want."

"Why don't you go with him?" She asked you.

"With Steve?" Your eyes widened. "Nah, I think it's a bad idea. I love him don't get me wrong but I feel like we're just gonna talk about Bucky and I really don't want to. You should go with him, you two are best friends."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. And I hate sports anyway, I did it for him." You said. "I'll stay here tonight and maybe force Bruce to watch a movie with me." You smiled.

"Alright, I'll talk to him about it." Nat took the tickets you handed her. "Don't worry, you two will go on other dates." She comforted you by putting a hand on your shoulder. "See you later, [Y/N]." She got up and left your room.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Since I picked our movie genre the last time I'll let you guys choose this time." You said to the remaining Avengers members in the room with you. It was just you, Tony, Bruce and Thor having dinner. Nat and Steve went to the baseball game and you were happy for them. At least the tickets weren't going to be wasted.

"Yeah but you're the only girl, we should let you pick."

"Very gentlemanly of you, Bruce-" You smiled at the doctor. "But really I insist. I'm already glad enough I won't be watching on my own."

"Well, it's not like we have anything better to do." Tony teased.

"Hey!" You threw in a fake upset voice and he laughed. "Come on, pick something."

"We'll think about it and let you know." Tony said.

"Alright." You nodded. You turned your head and noticed that Thor was awfully silent but also he seemed absent. "Hey, are you okay?" You asked him in a soft voice before gently placing your hand on his forearm.

"What?" He looked like he just came out of his thoughts.

"I asked you if you were okay, you seemed... not here." You explained.

"Yes." The Asgardian replied as he straightened himself on his chair. "I'm fine." He smiled politely at you.

"Are you sure?" You asked. "You can talk to me if you want, we're friends." You reminded him. "Is it about your family?" He sighed.

"Yes. My father doesn't seem to get better and my mother is very worried. I would go back on Asgard but Heimdall reassured me it's unnecessary, there's nothing I could do." You gently took his hand.

"I'm sure things will be fine, Thor." You smiled in comfort. "Your father is the strongest man you know, you told me about your war battles while I was healing Peter, you remember?" The God of thunder nodded. "He is simply taking his time to heal because he knows the realm is safe with your friends protecting it and Loki ruling with the support of your mother. It will get better."

"Thank you." Thor smiled a bit sadly as he squeezed your hand.

"I know it's hard and trust me I _know_ something about it but be patient, okay?" You said to him. "You and Loki are the strongest persons I've met and I'm sure your parents are the same way, they won't give up." You released his hand and leaned back on your chair. "Come on, tonight we'll watch a funny movie and distract ourselves from our respective problems. You and I are not allowed to be negative, okay?"

"You're also one of the strongest person I've met, [Y/N]." Thor said to you. "I see what my brother saw in you now."

"You mean he didn't like me for my insecurities?" You joked. "So, do you promise? No gloominess tonight or the next days, okay?"

"Okay, I promise." You smiled brightly at him before getting up since you were done with dinner.

"Movie room at 8?" You asked your teammates and they all agreed.

  
  


The boys had picked an old funny movie you had never watched before. You were seated next to Thor on the couch and Tony and Bruce were seated on another one next to yours. If at first you were having a good time and laughing at some scenes tiredness quickly gained your body and your eyes started to close on their own.

I mean you were in the perfect environnment. It was dark, a bit chilly and your seat was comfortable. Before the movie ended and the credits rolled you fell asleep not bothered by the volume of the film. The lights turned on and the boys got up and they turned to you when they noticed you didn't get up as well.

"Is she seriously sleeping?" Tony asked as he towered above you to look at your face.

"I think she is." Thor replied.

"Man, I wouldn't have been able to with all these sounds." Bruce commentated. "What should we do?"

"I'm not waking her up, I know how dangerous that task is." Tony said.

"It's fine, I will bring her back to her room." The God of thunder said.

"It's settled!" Tony announced happily. "Alright, gentlemen, I bid you goodnight." And then he left the room.

"Do you need help?" Bruce asked Thor.

"No, it's fine." The Asgardian said before leaning on your form and then carefully pick you up in his strong arms.

"Well, see you tomorrow then buddy." Bruce left the movie room as well.

Thor took the elevator and then walked in the hallway of your floor to put you to bed. You were sleeping peacefully and your breathing was steady. He found it amusing how you didn't flinch once while he carried you.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. could you open [Y/N]'s door?" Thor asked the AI.

"Yes, sir." A door opened and then the God of thunder walked in. He gently put you on your bed and removed the slippers you were wearing before covering your body with your blanket. He turned off the light and closed the door behind him when he left your bedroom.

 


	52. He's My Friend

When you woke up you were surprised to find you were not wearing your usual pajamas. What had happened? Wait, you don't even remember going to bed. Suddenly you rememberd the movie. Oh my God, did you fall asleep there? But then who put you to bed? It must've been one of the boys or the three of them since you were heavy. You were so embarrassed, they should've woke you up.

You got up and headed to the bathroom to wash yourself before going downstairs to have breakfast. You sighed deeply when you walked past Bucky's room, you had almost forgotten he wasn't in the tower.

"Hey." You said, a bit grumpy.

"You used to be brighter in the mornings, what happened?" Nat asked.

"I walked past Bucky's room."

"He'll come back soon enough [Y/N], don't worry." Steve said to you as he put a plate of pancakes on the table. "Good morning." He added before putting a kiss on top of your head.

"Hi. How was your night by the way?" You asked the captain and Nat.

"It was okay." She replied. "Got interesting at the end when a fight started."

"Nat." Steve raised one eyebrow.

"C'mon, it was funny." She said with a chuckle. "How about your night?" She asked you.

"It was cool, we watched a movie." You replied.

"You mean **we** watched a movie." Tony said as he gestured himself and Bruce.

"Wha- I watched it too... I just fell asleep at the end." You said.

"By the way your snoring is very loud." He joked.

"I-I don't snore!" You defended yourself as you blushed in embarrassment. "R-Right?" You asked Bruce when you crossed eyes with him.

"He's teasing you, you didn't snore." Bruce smiled. "It wasn't _that_ loud." You gasped and the four of them started laughing.

"I know I don't snore, Bucky would've told me about it." You said.

"He's so in love with you he probably finds it cute." Nat chuckled and you rolled your eyes.

"By the way how did you guys put me to bed? I don't remember going." You asked Tony and Bruce.

"Thor did." Tony replied. "I would've never risked waking you up."

"You should've." You said a bit shameful. "I'm sorry."

"You're fine." Bruce said.

"So, what are you all doing today?" You asked them while you were in the middle of breakfast.

"Well, I'll be at the lab, as always." Tony replied. Bruce nodded meaning he will be there as well.

"What about you, [Y/N]?" Steve asked you.

"Well, I..." You sighed. "Probably read and sleep. Sleep and read again until the night. Hopefully Bucky returns tomorrow." You said. "It's not like I have something to do."

"Yeah. And Fury didn't leave any messages either. I told him he could organize a few things for you if he wanted but SHIELD is busy and they prefer to preserve you in case real stuff happens." Tony said.

"We had to report him about your health after you healed Peter." Steve added.

"I understand. It's normal." You lowered your head. "I wish healing bigger injuries wouldn't drain me so much."

"You're totally fine [Y/N], your powers are a huge help." Bruce said. "And the most important is that you're okay."

"You wanna crash the mall with me again this afternoon?" Nat asked you.

"Are you sure? You're not busy?" You asked her.

"I gotta take care of something this morning but this afternoon I'm free."

"Okay, that's cool." You smiled. "Thank you." She smiled back at you.

  
  


\---

  
  


After lunchtime you had retreated to your room to change before going at the mall. Since Steve and Thor had nothing to do as well they decided to come with you both. It was cool, you liked each one of them and you were sure you were going to have a good time.

"I know what you guys are doing and I'm thankful." You smiled.

"What are we doing?" Steve asked as he drove the car. Nat was sitting next to him and you were with Thor in the backseat.

"Getting me out of the tower and distracting me so I don't think about Bucky." You explained.

"That's absolutely not what we're doing." Nat said. "We wanted to go out as well and have fun."

"Anyway, thank you, all of you." You said.

You finally arrived at the mall and so you and Nat decided to check out some shops.

"I feel like buying a new outfit." You said and the redhaired woman's eyes widened.

"You? Wanting to buy clothes? Who are you and what happened to our [Y/N]?" She joked.

"Oh c'mon, I just... I wanna look prettier." You said.

"Uh huh... And that has nothing to do with Bucky, right?" She chuckled and you rolled your eyes.

"Okay, maybe it does." You admitted.

"It's fine, I'm joking." She took your arm and guided you inside a shop. "Let's get you something nice to make him drool."

"Nat!" You blushed.

"I noticed him staring at you sometimes and I mean parts of your body." She said as she raised one eyebrow.

"Oh my God, really?" You had no idea.

"Your butt and your cleavage, they're your deadliest weapons against him. Trust me." She said to you as she looked through the clothes hanging in the shop.

"Really? I never really thought he liked my... breasts." You whispered. Steve and Thor were not following you both thankfully, they waited for you outside of the shop.

"I don't think it's your breasts that get him but... your neck." She said. "Something happened between you both during the truth and dare game."

"Oh my God, yeah, I felt it too." You revealed.

"I think it's also why he offered you that necklace you're wearing."

"I didn't think about it but you might be right." You tried to remember the times you spent with Bucky and he did act like he really liked kissing your neck.

"Okay, take those and go into that changing booth. I'll keep looking." You took the clothes she handed you and then you stepped inside a changing booth. Nat had a good eye, the clothes were your size which was surprising because usually when you tried to shop the store had nothing for you.

"I like this one." You said as you opened the curtain for her to check you out.

"Oh, perfect. It's really good. The off-the-shoulders cut really fits you and you're not showing too much cleavage so it's not vulgar. I think Bucky would like it. Wait, I'll ask the boys opinions." She left you there and went to get your other teammates.

"A-Are you sure?" You asked before she left. That was a bit embarrassing.

"Here! Tell her how amazing she looks!" Nat hurried Steve and Thor.

"You look very beautiful." The God of thunder complimented you and a blush started creeping on your cheeks.

"You do, it fits you." The captain smiled.

"Thank you." You smiled back shyly.

"You're taking it." Nat said to you. "Come on, next." She threw more clothes in your booth and then closed the curtain. The boys disappeard again to leave you some intimacy with Nat.

"Nat, what's this??" You asked her in shock. In your hands you were holding black thigh high stockings and a garter belt.

"Put them on, I've seen how Bucky looks at you."

"I-I can't, it's too much."

"With the skirt I picked it's gonna look amazing. Your man will literally never leave you." You hesitated and thought hard about it. "I can't hear you putting them on."

"Ugh, fine." You complied. Some minutes later you asked her to check.

"Oh my God, it looks amazing!" She beamed.

"I can never wear this." You let out.

"Yes, you will! When Bucky's gonna see you he's gonna lose his mind." She smirked. "But the best part is when he's gonna take your clothes off. This-" She said as she pulled on the visible strap on your thigh. "Is just a teaser to turn him on. When you're gonna sit down or lean next to him he's gonna see it appear under your skirt- because trust me, he does look, and he's gonna go crazy." You sighed deeply. You did want to please Bucky but you had never wore something like this before. "Come on, you've wore skirts before, what's the big deal if you just add these under?"

"Fine. You win." You said.

"You will thank me in the future." She grinned.

You kept shopping for a little while and she made you buy more stuff like everyday dresses and clothes but also another party dress in case because she warned you Tony loves to throw these around but also a gown because according to her you can't keep wearing your pink and cute pajamas to bed with Bucky.

You felt so sorry for Steve and Thor, they probably regretted coming with you and Nat, she made them carry you both bags as you shopped. At long last you all agreed to sit down at a café to rest. While Steve and Thor went to buy your drinks Nat wanted to speak to you quickly.

"So... Are you gonna tell me what's going on between you and Thor?" Your eyes widened.

"The what??" You asked in disbelief. "W-We're friends, I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Really? I don't know, you seem very close and everytime you get close to someone in this tower something happens."

"Nonsense." You defended yourself. "And we could never, I love Bucky and he told you all at the party he doesn't have romantic feelings for me."

"Be careful, I think you and Thor could end up like me and Steve." She said.

"Well, if it's just that I'm okay with it. He's my best friend and even if at first I thought we would've never gotten along he actually turned out to be really nice with me." You explained. "Also-" You stopped yourself, you didn't know if you should talk about this.

"What else?" Nat asked. You sighed.

"Do you promise to never tell anybody?" You asked.

"Oh my God, did you kiss him already?" She asked.

"Nat! No!" You said louder than you intended to. "Just promise you will never tell anyone and especially not Thor and Bucky."

"Fine, I promise." She finally said.

"Thor... He told me when I came back from the mission... Loki told him to look after me..." You revealed.

"What?" Her eyes widened.

"Actually his exact words were... Loki made him swear to protect me since he couldn't anymore because he's on Asgard. And Thor swore to him he would. I guess that's why we seem closer." You took a deep breath. "After my fight with Bucky it moved me you know? I really believe Thor only has friendship feelings for me-" You chuckled slightly. "He used to joke about how I'd be his sister-in-law if I actually got serious with his brother."

"That's very romantic." Nat said sarcastically.

"Oh stop, despite everything it made me a bit happy." You said. "I really like him and consider him as my best friend. We told a lot of personal things to each other."

"Okay, I believe you. I didn't know all these things." She said as she looked into your eyes.

"No more words, they're coming back." You said to her when you saw the God of thunder and the captain come back at your table.

"Sorry, it took longer. Their coffee machine broke so we got milkshakes instead." Steve said as he put them on the table.

"I got you the cookies and cream flavor since I noticed you liked that." Thor said as he put your drink in front of you. You saw him chuckle slightly.

"You did it on purpose, didn't you?" You smiled. "Guess your brother isn't the only one who likes to play games." You said to the Asgardian. You slightly slapped his arm when he didn't reply but kept laughing. "But thank you, I do indeed, like cookies."

"How did this nickname come by the way?" Nat asked.

"During the horror movie." You replied. "Loki and I shared some together and-" You blushed a bit.

"What?" Steve asked.

"He said I was... tempting." You revealed.

"My brother's a player." Thor laughed. You couldn't believe you were casually talking about the God of mischief with all of them.

"But anyway, despite Bucky leaving me, not warning me of his mission, cancelling our date and not sending me any texts-" You raised one eyebrow. "He's the one I love." You reminded your teammates. You didn't want them to think you had any feeling or regret about Loki.

"Be sure to make him feel sorry when he comes back." Nat said to you.

"That's so cruel." Steve commentated. You smiled slightly after you took a sip of your milkshake.

"I'm not mad at Bucky, don't worry." You reassured him. "Though, a bit upset indeed." You admitted truthfully.

"Well, if everything went well he should be back tomorrow." The captain said.

"I can't wait."

"Aww." Nat cooed.

"Stop making fun of me." You giggled slightly. "By the way sorry for making you both run around and carry our bags." You apologized to Steve and Thor.

"Why do you think I told them to come with us?" Nat asked you with a smirk.

"It's fine, [Y/N]. Don't worry." Steve brushed off.

"I had nothing better to do." Thor said to you with a smile.

"You know you can just say you wanted to spend time with me instead of using that excuse everytime." You teased. "But I'm glad you came." You smiled back at him. You knew Thor was going through some rough time at the moment and you really wanted to distract him from his problems as well. You two promised each other to not be sad and you intended on keeping that promise.

After some time at the café the four of you decided to go home but on your way to the parking lot of the mall you walked by a photobooth and Nat wanted to take some pics.

"I-I know I got better lately but I look horrible in pics. My confidence is just not there yet." You explained to her.

"Oh come on, take one with me." She grabbed your arm and pulled you into the booth with her.

"No please, I'm ugly." You said.

"[Y/N], that's ridiculous, you're not ugly." She turned her head to look at you. "I'll call Steve and Thor as well."

"We're never gonna fit the four of us inside this small booth. I'm fat and they're muscled."

"Ok, enough. You're not allowed to speak like that about yourself." She said firmly. "We'll just squeeze ourself at the front and they'll go behind. Steve! Thor! Come in!" She called them.

"We're not gonna fit." Steve said but Thor had already pushed him inside.

"That's what I said to her!" You couldn't even hear yourself over Nat and Thor laughing.

"Okay, everything hurts but hold it for 10 seconds until the pic is taken." She said while she pushed on the buttons. The four of you were squeezed against each other, you could barely breathe, it was a good thing you weren't claustrophobic. "Say cheese!"

_**Clic!** _

"Fresh air please!" You said before getting out of the booth, you were all panting as if you just ran.

"That was so funny." Nat said.

"Haha, I agree." Thor added.

"Okay, let's check the picture." Steve said as he retrieved it from the machine. You all went around the captain and suddenly you all exploded in laughter. It looked so bad, you were squeezed against each other, your faces were red and everyone's hair was on someone else's face. You just looked really uncomfortable and forced to smile.

"It's perfect." Nat commentated.

"Alright, let's go now." Steve hurried you all towards the elevator at the mall to get back to the parking.

"Today was really fun, thank you." You told your teammates in the car.

"I'm glad you enjoyed yourself." The captain said to you while he had his eyes on the road.

"I hope you had fun too." You said quietly to Thor next to you.

"I did." He turned his head towards you and smiled. You smiled back before reporting your attention on the scenery that displayed by your window. Despite everything your mind was focused on Bucky and you couldn't wait to see him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for your recent nice comments on my fic, it's really good to read them <3  
> The future chapters will hold more action and will get really exciting, I'm having a blast writing them at the moment!


	53. Ten Days

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to warn y'all I edited my message in chapter 25 and I deleted the spoilery tags about Loki. New people are reading my fic and I don't want to ruin their lecture with spoilers.

Ten days.

It's been ten days since Bucky had disappeard. Yes, you described it as a disappearance because you hadn't heard of anything from him. After the fifth day you asked Tony everyday about reports or words from Fury but all he replied was that the mission wasn't done. Why was it taking so long and why didn't Bucky send you a text or something? When you had your first mission you found time to call him and he couldn't even bother to do the same.

You felt like you were going crazy, the others didn't know what to do about you as well. They tried distracting you and taking you out but after some days you were just uninterested. You just wanted the winter soldier back. At least you knew he wasn't wounded otherwise you would've been called but still, his silence killed you.

Until finally one morning you've been called.

"Miss, you are requested at the lab." F.R.I.D.A.Y. announced to you in your room. You didn't even care what it was about, you ran there. Usually Tony would report to you about the mission so you hoped it was that.

"You called?" You asked to Tony when you found him there.

"That was quick." He said surprised.

"Is it about him? Is he here??" You asked.

"They're coming back. You should wait in the other lab, that's where they'll come if they need healing." You nodded and left. The other lab was just under Tony's, while his had machines for building all sorts of projects the other one looked more scientific. Bruce probably worked here. You figured if someone in the tower was wounded they'd probably bring them here, it had hospital beds as well and a lot of medical tools. You sat on a chair and waited in anticipation. You knew Sam was with Bucky because Steve had told you they were both on the mission. You rememberd him at the mall he seemed really friendly, you hoped the two of them were okay.

The look of surprise you had on your face when you saw that they weren't alone when they came at the lab. A woman was with them as well.

Bucky was in front of you but you had no idea how to react. Were you happy? Stressed? Upset? Mad? A bit of all to be honest. Thankfully Sam spoke first.

"Hey, [Y/N]." He rememberd your name. "How have you been since last time?" Sam smiled at you.

"I-I... Good." You stuttered, you quickly took back a hold of yourself. "I should be asking you that. Who's wounded?" You asked straight. He pointed to Bucky. You rolled your eyes. "Of course."

"Come here, man. Your girl's gonna take care of you." Sam joked.

"I'm not his girl at the moment." You said as you raised one eyebrow.

"I told you she'd be mad." He finally spoke but you ignored him and looked at the woman behind them.

"[Y/N], this is agent Carter." Sam introduced you to her.

"Hi, you can call me Sharon." She smiled at you and handed you her hand which you politely shaked. She was very pretty.

"I'm [Y/N]." You said. "Are you wounded?"

"No, I'm fine." She brushed off.

"What are you talking about? Show her your leg." Sam told Sharon.

"It's fine, you can trust me. What happened to you?" You asked her.

"She does wonders, she cured my shoulder just by touching it. That's how we met." Sam explained to her and you gently smiled at him.

"What about m-" You raised your hand to shush Bucky.

"Climb on it and show me your leg." You pointed to a bed and she walked towards it. Suddenly she started taking off her pants and you stayed baffled on your spot. I mean, just like that? In front of other people? In front of Bucky?? Thankfully she was wearing a pair of black shorts and not some sexy lingerie but you still found it rude. You had no time to pay attention to that though, her leg was badly bruised. "Alright." You sighed. "I'm gonna touch your leg, don't flinch and no, it's not gonna hurt."

You took a deep breath and closed your eyes before carefully putting your hands on her naked thigh. You visualized her injuries, it wasn't too bad but looked really ugly, she must've got hit hard and her blood vessels exploded which would explain the deep colors of her bruises. The healing took around ten minutes, her skin had a normal color when you were done.

"Wow, that's... amazing." She said as she looked at her leg.

"Are you hurt somewhere else? Any injuries?" You took a better look at her face. She was really pretty but her lip was split. "Don't move." You put your finger against her lip and five seconds later it was gone.

"Well, if we're at it..." Sharon raised her shirt on the side of her hip and you saw another bruise there. You put your palm against it and closed your eyes.

"And we're done." You told her with a small smile.

"Thank you." She said before getting up and putting back her pants on.

"Sam?" You asked him.

"No, really. I'm good. You should check Bucky though." You rolled your eyes and gestured your boyfriend to take Sharon's place on the bed. He walked over to you and took off his shirt before sitting on the bed. You went behind him and you saw his back was badly injured, he had bruises, cuts and- were those claws marks??

"You had all this time to get badly injured but you couldn't send me one message?" You asked as you placed your palms on his back.

"Ah, that's it. Here we go." Bucky let out. He knew it was about to happen. Another fight.

"10 days, Bucky." You reminded him. "10 days where I heard absolutely nothing from you."

"Uh, we're gonna leave you both some intimacy." Sam said as he placed his hand behind Sharon's back and hurried her towards the door.

"Thanks Sam, you're a real pal." Bucky said sarcastically to his friend.

"What? You're scared of being alone with me?" You raised one eyebrow.

"Honestly? Kinda. Ow!" You pushed your finger against one of his bruises.

"Who is she?" You had to ask.

"Who?" He asked as if he really had no idea who you were talking about.

"Stop playing Bucky. Who do you think I'm talking about?" You continued to heal him after all. "Sharon." You said.

"You can't be serious. Please don't tell me you're jealous." You gasped. "You really are." He chuckled.

"Get out of here." You said to him, upset.

"Wh- But my back?"

"Maybe ask Sharon." You spat at him.

"Come back here, you're being ridiculous." He grabbed your waist before you could walk away. "She's just an agent, we've worked with her before."

"Did something happen between you both?" You asked and he grinned. "You disgust me." You said as you pushed your palms against his shoulders so he could release you from his grip.

"I'm playing you, nothing happened between me and her. She's an agent." He explained to you.

"You disappear for 10 days, you don't send me any messages, you don't even warn me about your mission, you cancel my date-" It was too much you started crying of frustration.

"Stop. Please don't cry, I'm sorry." Bucky said as he looked at your face.

"You've been a whole lot of sorry since I live here." You said.

"I've been other things as well." He raised one eyebrow. You wiped your tears and when he released you you went back behind him to heal him. "Wait, give me a kiss." He asked and you let out a low chuckle.

"You're delusional." You said as you healed him. "I'm done."

"With us?" His eyes widened.

"With your back." You replied.

"Oh." You walked back in front of him.

"Are you hurt somewhere else?" You asked. Bucky grabbed your hand and put your palm against his chest.

"Here." He smirked.

"Will you stop being an idiot?" You brought your hand back to yourself. Suddenly he got up and towered you, he was always taller than you. "What do you think you're doing?" You asked.

"I want you." The winter soldier said before grabbing you by your waist and laying you on the bed. You let out a gasp then he crawled between your legs. "You said it yourself, you and I belong to each other." You stared into his eyes as your heart beat fast against your ribcage.

"That was before you left me with no news for 10 whole days."

"Cut the crap [Y/N], you just want me to win you back with other dates and gifts. Deep inside you know you want me too." He gripped one of your thighs and put it against his hip. "I will take you on as many dates as you want and offer you everything you want. But right now-" His hand had discreetly creeped between your legs. "I know what we both really want."

"Ahh..~" You closed your eyes and moaned quietly as he rubbed you through your clothes. Bucky buried his head in the crook of your neck and deeply inhaled your scent before kissing your skin there.

"I missed you so much, doll." He said as he shoved his hand inside your pants.

"Not enough to send me a mess- Aaah!" You gripped his arm when you felt the coldness of his metal fingers press flatly against your warm and throbbing clit. You threw your head back when he started rubbing you. "Fuck!" You cursed after Bucky bit your neck.

"You are dripping." He commentated as his hand explored your entire pussy.

"P-Please..." You whispered.

"Please what?" He smirked.

"Make me feel good and I might forgive you a litt- hnng! Fuck it's cold!" The winter soldier pushed two metal fingers inside of you.

"They're gonna warm up soon and you'll feel good." He promised before leaving more kisses on your neck and collarbone.

"K-Keep going..." You asked him quietly as he pushed his fingers in and out of you and rubbed your clit with his thumb. You wrapped one arm around his back while the other was still gripping his arm.

"Look at me." You turned your head and looked at his face. He leaned to kiss you but you turned your head.

"You don't get to kiss me now." You said with an amused grin.

"You evil little-" He chuckled before curling his fingers inside of you.

"B-Bucky!" You shouted. "P-Please, right there!" You begged.

"Right there?" He smirked as he shoved his fingers deeper and curled them to reach your soft spot. "Here?" Your thighs were shaking against his arm.

"Oh, f-fuck! Please, please, don't stop!" He started drilling inside of you until he had you soaking your pants and his metal fingers up to his wrist. He covered your mouth with his free hand because of how loud you had become.

"You're so cute, you just had your first intense orgasm." Bucky smiled proudly before leaning on you and kissing your forehead. You were panting under him, trying to recover from your high orgasm. He brought his hand back to himself and fixed your pants. "Come on, let's get out of here before Bruce comes." He picked you up in his arms and headed to the elevator.

  
  


\---

  
  


"And then we caught their boss, he was hiding like a kid while we were all out there fighting." Sam told you all the story of their mission while you were having lunch in the dining room.

"Damn, that sounds crazy." Bruce commentated.

"It was." Sharon added. You ate in silence while they spoke, you were still stuck on why didn't Bucky send you any messages while he was away.

"Anyway, it's nice seeing you both again. I'm glad you're staying for a few days." Steve smiled to Sam and Sharon.

"Well, I did say I'd drop by soon, didn't I?" Sam replied. "This was the perfect occasion."

"Talking about perfect occasions, how about we throw a little party tonight? To celebrate the success of this mission?" Tony suggested.

"Oh, nice." Nat said. You don't remember them throwing a party for _your_ missions but okay...

"That's a great idea, count me in." Sam added. Suddenly you felt something tickle your legs under the table, you looked down with furrowed brows.

"What are you doing?" You asked Bucky. He simply smiled at you in response.

"Are you both cool again?" Sam asked you.

"Yes." The winter soldier replied.

"No." You said at the same time.

"Well, that's sad. He wouldn't shut up about you during the mission." You started blushing slightly as you crossed eyes with Bucky.

"And yet he couldn't bother to warn me about it or send a message." You muttered.

"Sorry I asked, since you stayed at the lab for a long time I assumed you talked it out." You lowered your head and Bucky chuckled lightly which earned him you stomping on his foot under the table.

"It's fine." You forced yourself to smile.

"Well, for all it's worth she wouldn't shut up about him as well." Tony said and you gasped.

"Excuse me, on who's side are you?" You asked him.

"The side of the truth, [Y/N]." And your teammates nodded to support his message. You rolled your eyes and crossed your arms on your chest as you pouted on your chair. Bucky turned his chair to look at you and then he gently bopped your scrunched nose.

"You talked about me?" He asked with a bright grin and you hated how handsome he looked. You turned your head the other way to avoid looking at him. Bucky took one of your hands and kissed your palm, even ten days later he'd remember your heart would do a small jump when he did that to you.

"Stop dreaming, I simply asked after you because you always get injured in missions." You _**lied**_.

"She literally harassed me these 5 past days for any news about you." Tony said.

"TONY!" You yelled at him and some Avengers around the table couldn't help letting out a chuckle. "Ugh."

"Come on, you told us you couldn't wait for him to come back and now he's here." Steve added.

"I think she's right to be upset, he did not message her for 10 days." Nat defended you.

"Thank you Nat, I see I still have one friend in this kitchen." You glared at Tony and Steve.

"I didn't want to worry you and I was focused on my mission." Bucky explained.

"You didn't warn me about the mission either and didn't say anything about the date **I** planned to make it up to you."

"I-I... had forgotten." You threw your hands up in the air.

"So, I have a reason to be upset. Thank you." You said before getting up and walking out of the kitchen.

"That's one hell of a woman you got yourself there, Bucky." Sam said to him.

"Can you believe she used to discreetly pull on my sleeve and ask me to stay with her when there were people around?" Bucky said with a little smile.

"That's so adorable." Nat commentated. "She was really dead worried about you though. You should've messaged her."

"That's true. She wouldn't even do stuff with us these past few days." Bruce revealed to Bucky.

"Okay, alright. I feel bad." The winter soldier said before sighing. "I'm gonna go talk to her and apologize." Then he got up and left the kitchen as well.

 


	54. Best Girlfriend In The World

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm posting a bunch of chapters because I wrote the next ones so quickly, I can't wait for you all to read them hehe

**Knock knock!**

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. who's at my door?" You asked the AI.

"Bucky, miss." She replied instantly. You sighed deeply before opening it.

"Hey, can I come in?" The winter soldier asked. You moved out of the way and let him in before closing the door. "I'm sorry." You chuckled dryly.

"I heard that somewhere." You said.

"I know I said it a lot but I meant it everytime." He continued. You sat on the edge of your bed and listened to him. Since you stayed silent he approached you and sat next to you on the bed. "I really missed you."

"I'm disappointed that in those whole 10 days you apparently couldn't find a moment to message me for exemple after eating or before sleeping. I'm not even asking for a big text, just a small thing would've been nice." You spoke as you lowered your head.

"Did you miss me?" He asked. Your eyes widened.

"How can you ask or even doubt that?" You raised your head back to look at him. "10 whole days, Bucky! I was going mad!" You let out. "In my own paranoia, stress and fear I thought you had died and the others were hiding the truth from me!" He grinned while you were talking and you hated it. "Erase that joyous expression from your goddamn face." You ordered him.

"I told Sam everything about you." He said. "I was missing you so badly. I wanted to see you, to touch you, to kiss you and many more. It felt so good to talk about you. Tell him how amazing you are, how strong you've become since your first day here and he listened to all of it." Bucky smiled brightly.

"That must've been so annoying to him, I feel bad for Sam." You said as a blush had crept on your cheeks but the winter soldier noticed it and he was amused by it.

"Doll, let me hold you please. It's been so long." You looked at him as you hesitated. "Come on, I know you missed these." He said as he rolled up his sleeves and showed you his arms, it made you giggle slightly.

"Will you take off your shirt?" You asked softly.

"Everything my girl wants." He grinned before taking it off. "Wait, will you let me look at your-" He lowered his eyes and you gasped before hitting him lightly.

"Buck!"

"I'm joking." He laughed before tackling you on the bed and hugging you tightly against him as you both laid on it. You couldn't help wrapping your arms around his back and squeezing him against you.

"If you ever do that to me again-" You said as you stared into his eyes. "I was panicking." You admitted.

"I'm really sorry, doll." Bucky apologized. "I'll try not to do it again."

"Try?" You asked and he laughed again before putting a kiss on your chin. You put your hand against his cheek and caressed it before leaning on him and softly brush your lips against his.

"Hmm." He hummed pleasantly against your mouth, not expecting you to kiss him but he loved it. Bucky ran his hands through your hair and catched your lips again on his when you broke it the first time. "I'm so in love with you." You smiled slightly as you stared into his eyes.

"I love you too, Bucky." You said.

"Please promise me the next time we fight the first thing we'll do is this." He kissed you again.

"You know very well that's not how it's going to go." You giggled.

"Alright. Maybe I should try what I did this morning." He smirked and you instantly blushed.

"You're so annoying." You huffed. "Get out of here, I want to nap before the party tonight. I barely slept these last few days because of how worr-" You interrupted yourself before revealing it was because of him.

"You are the most adorable thing I've ever had." Bucky grinned and then tightened his grip on you. "You can sleep, I'll hold you."

"No funny business?" You raised one eyebrow.

"Can't promise that." He smirked. "I'm joking." He said after seeing your brows furrow. "I just want to feel you against me." You rolled your eyes before taking a sitting position on the bed. Bucky's eyes widened when you took off your hoodie and laid back next to him. You were topless. "Do you have any idea what you do to me?" He asked.

"You said you wanted to feel me against you." You smiled innocently. Bucky crashed his lips against yours and kissed you deeply. You hummed softly as he ran his flesh hand on your waist. The chilly air brushing on your naked skin mixed with Bucky's touch sent a chill down your spine and you started shivering. You got goosebumps and your nipples started pointing.

"You're so soft and warm." Bucky breathed against your skin when he broke the kiss and went to bury his head in the crook of your neck. He kissed and sucked on your skin there travelling further down, he left new kisses on your sternum and then his mouth closed around one of your nipples.

"Bucky..." You quietly moaned his name. He circled the little fleshbud with his tongue before harshly sucking on it making you squirm against him. His hand grabbed your other breast and fondled it as he kissed the other.

"You can sleep while I touch you." He whispered.

"That's not how it works, Bucky."

"Why not?"

"Because you're turning me on and I don't want to have sex right now." You explained. Bucky lowered his body until head was at your chest level. He wrapped his arms around the lower of your back while he kept teasing your breasts. "B-Buck..." It felt really good though, your hands naturally went to his hair and you softly petted him while he kissed your body. "What are you, a baby?" You giggled quietly.

"I can be anything that you want." He smirked.

"Hhhah..~" You let out an accidental moan when you felt his teeth on your nipple. "How about just a nice boyfriend who lets his girlfriend sleep?" You asked. He let go of your nipple with a loud pop and came back at your level.

"Fine." He gave up.

"Be patient." You said to him.

"Hey, it's been 10 days for me too." Bucky raised one eyebrow. You let out a breath as you started thinking.

"Will you let me nap if I touch you?" You asked him and he started grinning. "I could feel it against my thigh while you hugged me."

"You're the best girlfriend in the world." Bucky smiled excitedly before leaving a few kisses on your face.

"Alright, come here." The winter soldier pulled down his sweatpants along with his underwear and you saw his dick spring free. It was erected and the tip was red and leaking a bit already. You bit onto your lower lip before taking it in your hand. Bucky let out a relieved sigh when your fingers closed around his shaft.

"Oh fuck..." He cursed when you started pumping him. It was throbbing in your hand and you could clearly see the veins appear on the sides. Bucky leaned on you and kissed you while you rubbed him. "D-Doll..." He moaned against your lips when you joined your other hand to his crotch and gently fondled his testicles.

"Shh, I got you." You whispered.

"You're so hot, I'm the luckiest man." Bucky smiled seductively as he looked into your eyes. A blush had crept on your cheeks as he praised you. You had almost forgotten how much you loved his compliments because to you only his opinion mattered.

"I love you Bucky and I'm yours." You said quietly. He put one of his hands behind your head and brought your face against his to kiss you sensually. His tongue met yours inside your mouth and they danced together. You felt hot, his kisses always made you feverish.

"Please go faster, I'm close." You nodded and started focusing on your handjob to bring him to the edge. You noticed his breathing got faster and as always when he was about to finish Bucky buried his head in the crook of you neck and held you closely against him. He moaned and groaned against your skin and all of his sounds went straight to your lower stomach. It was the sexiest thing you've experienced. The winter soldier finally came, white, warm and sticky ropes landed on your stomach and your hands.

"That's it, baby." You continued pumping him until he was done. His hips and thighs were trembling until they naturally ceased to, that was your cue to stop touching him. "I would hold you but my hands are a bit- Wait here." You got up and went to the bathroom. Bucky heard the water run and he thought you were probably washing your hands, which was correct. You also wiped your stomach clean and then you grabbed a washcloth that you wetted a bit before returning next to the winter soldier. You climbed on the bed and cleaned him then you put the washcloth away and finally wrapped Bucky in your arms. You caressed his back with your hands as you smiled. "I love you so much." You said before putting a few kisses on his shoulder.

"You-" Bucky finally spoke. He put his two palms against the sides of your head and stared into your eyes. "There is not one single thing on this planet I wouldn't do for you." You smiled happily before he leaned on your face and kissed you passionately.

"Can I be honest with you?" You asked him after you two naturally broke the kiss. He pulled his pants back up as he nodded. "You're so hot when you-" You bit onto your lower lip as you blushed of embarrassment. "When you finish." You confessed. Bucky looked at you in amusement, his gaze going from your eyes to your lips, you turned him on so much. "Oh no, I know that look Bucky."

"Come on, you must want to as well." He bit onto his lower lip as he looked at you.

"T-Tonight okay? If we're not too tired after the party, I'll let you do whatever you want." You said to him. He raised one eyebrow.

"Everything?" Bucky asked with a mischievious smirk.

"Well, I trust you to know my boundaries but yeah, whatever you want." You repeated.

"I have a few things in mind." He chuckled.

"That's absolutely not scary at all-" You said sarcastically. "But whatever. Now would you please be a sweetheart and hold me so I can sleep peacefully?" You asked.

"Your wish is my command." Bucky brought you tightly against him and wrapped his arms around your body so you'd feel covered, warm and protected. Finally you closed your eyes.

  
  


\---

  
  


You were getting ready in your room for the party before the winter soldier would come get you. After what happened at your birthday party he promised he would directly escort you to it and not leave your side. You smiled at that. That disaster was a long gone memory now and no longer painful.

You took the new dress that Nat made you buy at the mall and decided to put it on. It wasn't coming from a luxury boutique this time so it was cheaper but it was still pretty. You just felt a bit self conscious about the cleavage, it was really revealing. You hoped Nat and Sharon would bring out their best game as well so you wouldn't be at the center of attention.

This dress was black as well, the best color for people of your corpulence you thought, but the style was different from your other dress. It was long and reached your ankles but it had a long cut on the side so your leg would appear. The sleeves were in lace and like stated earlier, the cleavage was deep. While you were putting on your heels you heard a knock at your door. Your hair and makeup had already been taken care of earlier.

"What the hell are you wearing?" Bucky's eyes widened when he saw you.

"You look very good as well." You said sarcastically and rolled your eyes. Though it was true, he did. He wore a fancy suit again that matched with his eyes and your pupils dilated at the sight. Bucky quickly stepped inside your room and closed the door.

"You look beautiful, that's not the problem." He said as you looked upset. "I'm just worried I can see your nipples."

"What??" You lowered your head to check your chest. "No, you can't." You said with furrowed brows.

"I can when you step under the light. Come." He grabbed your hand and made you go into your bathroom to check yourself in front of the mirror. "Now look." He raised one eyebrow.

"Oh my God, you can." You blushed in embarrassment. The fabric was see-through but since it was black if you weren't standing under a light you couldn't notice it.

"Just put something under, it's fine."

"T-That's not the problem..." You said with dread as you rememberd what happened at the mall while you were trying the clothes Nat was handing you.

"What's wrong?" Bucky asked.

"I-I tried this dress at the mall..."

"And? You were in a booth right?"

"Please don't be mad okay... I-I didn't know it was see-through..." You started panicking. This was so embarrassing.

"What happened?"

"When I was trying on clothes Nat was there and giving me her opinion..."

"Ok, that's what you girls do." Bucky said. You took a deep breath before letting it all out.

"Steve and Thor were there as well." You said quickly. You saw Bucky's eyes widen in the mirror. "B-But I don't think they noticed Bucky! They said nothing as well. Not even Nat. I think nobody noticed." You explained.

"They saw you in this dress? And why were they with you and Nat?" He asked.

"It was last week, I was down and Nat proposed to go to the mall, Steve and Thor had nothing to do so they came with us." You explained. "Nat was complimenting me about the clothes I tried on but-" You sighed deeply. "You know how I am, I thought I looked bad and she was just being nice so she called Steve and Thor to give me their male opinions." You took Bucky's hand and looked at him. "Please say something, I promise you I don't think any of us noticed something. You know I wouldn't have even bought this dress if I knew it was so revealing."

"I'll ask Steve." He said.

"Are you crazy?" You asked. "That's so embarrassing, you can't do that. And how awkward will this whole situation look if he replies positively. I'd rather never know if they saw something. They were polite enough to keep quiet." You got out of the bathroom and sat on your bed. "Oh my God, that's so humiliating." You took your head between your hands. "Ugh." You got up and opened a drawer.

"What are you doing?" Bucky asked.

"Well, I don't have anything else to wear so I'm forced to stick with this dress." You finally found what you were looking for.

"Is that tape?" He asked.

"Nat showed this trick to me."

"I think you hang out too much with her." You couldn't help letting out a chuckle.

"C'mon, she's not bad influence."

"I think she is, I miss my sweet innocent [Y/N]." You rolled your eyes.

"Help me put this on." You handed him the tape.

"Isn't that like... uncomfortable?" He asked.

"Bucky, those heels are uncomfortable, this dress is uncomfortable, everything girls put on at parties is uncomfortable." You said to him as you unzipped your dress. "But I can't just put on my leggings and a hoodie to Tony's party."

"I'm sorry you have to go through all this." He said and you smiled sadly.

"You're so cute but it's alright." You reassured him. "Come on, we're gonna be late and they're gonna think we've been doing... stuff." You blushed. Bucky let out a quiet laugh before cutting a piece of tape. You had lowered your dress to your waist so the winter soldier could apply the tape to your nipples.

"It doesn't stick, they're... pointing."

"Ugh." You were frustrated. "Well, it is a bit chilly." You said.

"What can I do?" He asked.

"I-I don't know, Bucky. T-Try poking them or something..." You blushed. "No, not with that hand, it's cold enough." You said to him as he was about to touch you with his metal fingers. "Hhhn."

"Please don't make those sounds now." Bucky begged you.

"Is it working?"

"Yeah, one sticked."

"Oh, thanks God." You sighed out of relief.

"Okay, your nipples are covered."

"Great. Now please help me zip this up and we're done." Bucky helped you put your dress back on and then he placed you under a light in your room to check the work. "So?"

"Can't see them anymore." You grinned before taking a few steps towards the winter soldier, you wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him.

"Let's go." You said as you put your hand on the doorknob.

"[Y/N]?" Bucky called you.

"Yes?"

"You're breathtaking." He said with a smile and you felt like crying as you smiled back.


	55. We Are Good

"My lady?" Bucky smiled at you as he gave you his arm. You happily took it and then you both were on your way to the party.

You were really happy to finally spend the night with Bucky, it's been so long and the last few days at the tower were so depressing. Finally the whole gang was reunited again.

You entered the party room, which was re decorated for the occasion, music was playing and people were scattered around, talking in small groups.

"Hey, you two finally decided to show up." Nat said. "We were getting worried." She smirked. As always the redhaired woman looked her best, she really had taste in fashion. If one day she wanted to stop doing this job she should definitively become a designer.

"Hey, [Y/N]." Sam greeted you again. "Bucky." He smiled at his friend and he couldn't help noticing your arm under the winter soldier's. "So, are we good this time?" He asked. You smiled slightly.

"We are." You said. "We're good." You looked at Bucky and he turned his head to look at you as well with a happy smile on his face. He leaned on you and softly brushed his lips against yours.

"Ah! Finally!" Tony let out as he approached you all. "Now all your whining in my ears has been worth it if you two are together again." He teased you. You rolled your eyes as he chuckled.

"Well, I'm very happy for you two." Sam added. "You know, he really loves you." He said as he pointed to Bucky.

"I love him too." You said to Sam as you wrapped your arm around your boyfriend. "And by the way, he told me he told you everything about me, I'm so sorry about that."

"It's all good. If everything he said is true, which I don't doubt, I'm glad he found someone like you who loves him back." You blushed slightly, you couldn't help your lips from curving into a bright smile. Bucky tenderly put a kiss against your forehead.

"I'm gonna get you something to drink." You nodded and then he left with Sam towards the bar.

"Hey." You approached Bruce and Thor who were sitting on a couch.

"Hi, [Y/N]." They both said. "How are you? We haven't seen you all afternoon."

"I took a nap. I was relieved after Bucky finally came back home." You explained.

"Ah, yeah. You told us you had trouble sleeping since you were too worried about him during the mission." Bruce rememberd.

"Hmm, exactly." You said. "But all is well now." You smiled.

"Well, I'm happy for you."

"Thank you." You smiled at the doctor. "Are you okay?" You nudged Thor on the arm. "Come on, what did we say?" You asked him with a little smile.

"No more gloominess." He replied with a small smile.

"Exactly! Come on, if things got better for me they will for you too." You reassured him. "I don't like seeing you depressed like this." You confessed to him. "And you know who else wouldn't want to see you like this?" You raised one eyebrow. "Your family." The God of thunder chuckled slightly.

"Thank you, [Y/N]." You smiled at him. "You look very beautiful by the way." He added and you couldn't help blushing slightly.

"Thanks." You replied shyly, you felt very intimidated suddenly.

"Here's your drink." Bucky appeard in front of you and handed you a glass. You took it and smiled at him.

"Thank you." You took a sip before raising your eyes up when the winter soldier handed you his hand. You looked at him confused.

"Come." You didn't know what he wanted but you grabbed his hand anyway and left Thor on the couch. You felt bad about leaving him especially in the state he was in but you couldn't risk upsetting your boyfriend after you literally just got him back.

"Where are you taking me?" You asked him. Oh God, soon enough you saw it. The _dancefloor_. Bucky took your glasses and put them on a table.

"May I have this dance?" He asked you with a seducing grin and _damn_ , you couldn't help melting.

"Yes." You accepted excitedly. Bucky took your hand and brought you in the center of the room. He placed his metal arm in the lower of your back and took your hand with his flesh one. You put your free hand on his shoulder and then he started slowly swaying with you squeezed against him. You thought that this place, this dance, his request even would remind you of a certain someone but all you thought about was your first date with Bucky and when you danced on a hill. That was one of your most precious memory with the winter soldier.

"You're so perfect. Everything about you." He whispered to your ear since the music was loud and you couldn't help shivering. You guided the hand that was on his shoulder on his nape and gently caressed him there as you danced. "I'm sorry I was mean to you." He said.

"Bucky-"

"I thought about it... While I was away. I was afraid that if I had died during the mission those- meaningless words I said to you would be what you would remember of me." Bucky looked upset but with himself, not you.

"Stop, I'm gonna cry." You warned him.

"You deserve me." He said. "And I'm not even enough. You deserve so much more. You deserve the whole world." You gulped as you looked at him. "I really need you to believe that everything vile I said to you... I didn't mean one single word. And you have no idea how much it pains me that you might still be thinking about them, torturing your mind with what I said when I was angry." A tear rolled down your cheek as you listened to him. "I'm really sorry, doll." He gently wiped your tear away.

"I love you Bucky and as we said- I don't wanna think about it anymore." You told him. "We're together now and it's all that matters to me. I'm in love with you and it's all that I believe." Bucky caressed your cheek before leaning on you and kissing you passionately. He pressed your body against his as he put all his love for you in his kiss. "Hmm." You hummed pleasantly against his lips.

"I'm in love with you too. I wish there were stronger words to tell you how much I love you." Bucky said to you.

"Kiss me like that again and I'll believe it." You smiled. He leaned on you again and catched your lips with his once again.

"Huh hum." Nat interrupted you both.

"What do you want?" Bucky asked her.

"Wh- don't be rude." You told him.

"She's interrupting something very important." You rolled your eyes as you smiled.

"We were about to have a game of karaoké, we thought maybe you both would want to join us." She suggested. Bucky looked at you and you nodded.

"Fine." He sighed. "We're coming."

  
  


\---

  
  


Tony and Thor were screaming their lungs out in a high pitched voice singing an AC/DC song while all of you around them were crying in laughters. You were glad the Asgardian was finally having fun. He seemed down by the beginning of the night but at long last he was enjoying himself.

The song ended and you all clapped for them.

"That was one hell of a performance!" Sam let out. Tony bowed as he accepted the applause.

"Who wants to go next?" Thor asked.

"I'll do it." Your eyes widened when you saw Bucky stand up next to you. "And my song is for my doll, obviously." He winked in your direction,

"What are you doing?" You asked in confusion but with a small smile. He grabbed the mic and then the first notes started playing.

"Oh, it's perfect." Nat commentated next to you. Apparently she knew the song, you didn't. Then Bucky started singing and your jaw dropped. Where the hell did that come from??

_♪ Oh, why you look so sad, the tears are in your eyes♪_   
_♪ come on and come to me now, and don't be ashamed to cry♪_   
_♪ let me see you through, 'cause I've seen the dark side too♪_

You looked at him in awe as you listened to the lyrics he was singing. They really spoke to you and his voice was so smooth, you had no idea he could sing like that.

 _♪When the night falls on you, you don't know what to do♪_  
♪nothing you confess could make me love you less♪  
♪I'll stand by you♪

Bucky's gaze never left yours while he sang, it's like it was only the two of you in the room at the moment. Nothing else existed.

 _♪I'll stand by you, won't let nobody hurt you♪_  
♪I'll stand by you♪  
♪baby, even to your darkest hour, and I'll never desert you♪  
♪I'll stand by you♪  
♪And when, when the night falls on you baby♪  
♪you're feeling all a lone, you're wandering on your own♪  
♪I'll stand by you♪

The song ended and you were still lost in the moment, it's everyone's clapping that brought you back. You got up from your seat and went to kiss Bucky. You didn't care who was around and watching. He just made you feel a whole new wave of emotions inside of you and they were dying to get out. Bucky kissed you back while everyone cheered.

"That..." You stared into his eyes. "That was so beautiful, Bucky." You said to him with a tender smile. He had really conquered your heart with that song.

"I'm glad you liked it." The winter soldier smiled back at you.

"[Y/N], do you want to sing one too?" Steve asked. You bit onto your lower lip. I mean, you had to now, you couldn't not sing something to Bucky.

"Alright." You said. "I think the lyrics will speak for themselves." You smiled as you took the mic. You picked your song and then as everyone went silent the first notes started playing.

♪ _I never really saw you coming and you turned me around♪  
♪I used to think all was nothing but look at this love we found♪_

Bucky smiled as you sang. You both had the same memories playing in your heads when you heard each other's songs. The first days of your encounter.

♪ _Give me your hand like it’s of mine♪_  
♪No I don’t ever wanna see you cry (oooh-eeeo)♪  
♪No more tears (oooh-eeeo) No more tears♪  
  
♪Take that chance, we'll be fine♪  
♪No I don’t ever wanna see you cry (oooh-eeeo)♪  
♪No more tears (oooh-eeeo) No more tears (oooh-eeeo)♪

Your song ended and everyone clapped. You felt a little embarrassed which caused a blush to creep on your cheeks. Bucky got up and suddenly he picked you up bridal style in his arms, you gasped.

"Excuse us, we got some talking to do. We'll be back though." The winter soldier explained to the others who watched you two in amusement. They knew damn well just like you that no talking was about to be done.

"Bucky, are you crazy? That's so embarrassing they know you did not kidnap me to _talk_." You said as you wrapped your arms around his neck.

"I don't care what they think." He smirked as he carried you to the kitchen.

"Why here?"

"It's a different floor, no one will bother us here." You bit onto your lower lip as you looked at him.

"You couldn't wait one more hour, huh?" You asked him with a small smile.

"Hearing you sing made me want to hear more sounds from you." You blushed instantly. He looked around him and finally found a spot to deposit you on. He put you on top of the counter and then he stood between your legs. Bucky leaned on you and kissed you deeply while his hands travelled under your dress. He pulled the material up until he could see your panties appear. He gently spread your legs before leaning on you to kiss your thighs.

"B-Bucky..." You rested on your elbows on the counter as he kissed the inside of your thighs then he rubbed his nose against your panties and sniffed you. He loved your smell. Bucky kissed and licked you through your panties as he held your legs up, his hands closed around the back of your knees and kept them spread.

"I love you so much." Bucky said quietly as he slid one finger under the fabric of your panties and moved them to the side.

"Do you know how embarrassing it is when you're not looking into my eyes when you say that?" You giggled slightly.

"So beautiful-" He continued to praise you. "So wet and sweet-"

"Bu- oh, fuck!" You threw your head back when he closed his mouth on your pussy. He licked and sucked on your clit, your breathing got faster and your thighs trembled around his head. You closed your eyes and moaned loudly as he licked long stripes along your slit. Bucky knew exactly how to please you, he played your body like an instrument and he knew all your melodies.

"Doll, please." He said between two licks as he reached for one of your hands and put it on his head. You knew what he wanted and you gave it to him. Bucky groaned against your slit as you pulled on his hair, his voice sent vibrations on your clit and it felt so good. You gripped his hair harder as his lips closed around your clit once more, it drove you crazy all the things he could do to you, everything he made you feel.

"Hhhn no..." You whined in frustration when he stopped.

"I'm sorry, I promise I'll make you come." Bucky stood up between your legs and started unbuckling his belt. "One day you're gonna sit on my face." You bit onto your lower lip as you blushed profusely.

"You're crazy." You said to him.

"Crazy for you." He smirked before leaning on you and catching your mouth with his for a deep and wet kiss. You could taste yourself on his tongue but you didn't care.

"Aaah!" You moaned against his lips. You looked down and saw Bucky rubbing his dick between your pussy lips.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"N-Nothing..." You said. "I-It's just... still sensitive." You explained as you turned your head to avoid looking at him. Bucky chuckled slightly before he kissed you again.

"You're so hot." The winter soldier left a trail of kisses from your jaw to your neck as his hips worked against yours.

"Please put it in before I lose my mind." You asked Bucky as you wrapped one arm around his neck while he kept kissing your skin.

"You're so needy." He teased with a smirk.

"You started this, you better finish now." You said as you raised one eyebrow.

"I'll give my precious doll everything she desires." Bucky put a kiss on your lips before leaning back and grabbing his dick with his hand to guide it towards your entrance. He pushed the tip back and forth inside a few times to stretch you.

"I can take it." You said quietly. Bucky tenderly caressed your thighs as he slowly thrusted his hips against yours. "Oh fuck..." You closed your eyes as your brows furrowed a little the deeper he reached.

"You feel so fucking amazing." He said. "I'll never get tired of this feeling." You giggled slightly which caused your walls to clench around Bucky. "Oh fuck, I felt that as well."

"You can start moving... please." You begged him. The winter soldier put your legs around his waist before gripping yours with his hands and finally he started thrusting inside of you.

"I'll wait 10 more days for this. For you."

"You couldn't even wait 1 hour." You grinned.

"Do you regret it though huh? When I do this?" He harshly shoved his hips against yours and you let out a loud moan.

"F-Fuck..!" You cursed. Bucky picked up a faster pace and you squeezed your thighs tighter around his waist.

"Hug me." He said. "I want to feel you against me." You smiled at his request. You leaned forward and wrapped your arms around his neck.

"Is this close enough?" You whispered next to his ear. Bucky smirked before grabbing your buttcheeks under your dress and pressing you harder against him. You moaned on his shoulder as he went deeper inside of you and rubbed softer spots on your walls.

You were both lost in your own little world of pleasure and lust you unfortunately didn't hear someone step inside the kitchen.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bucky's song: The Pretenders – I stand by you  
> Reader's song: W O L F C L U B - Tears


	56. Reveal

"S-Steve!" You gasped.

"Oh no, not again." Bucky said against your neck as he kept thrusting inside of you.

"Bucky, stop!" You pushed against his shoulders to stop him and then covered your thighs with the bottom of your dress. The winter soldier turned his head and found the captain freezing on his spot.

"O-Oh God, I-I'm so sorry." Steve blurted out as he turned around. He was as red as a beet, you could see from his nape and the tip of his ears.

"O-Oh my God, I have to get out of this tower." You said as you put your palms on your face. Bucky pulled out of you and put his pants back on. You jumped off the counter and ran out of the kitchen.

"Doll, it's fine." You didn't hear Bucky, you were already out. Steve turned around slowly to check if his best friend was _decent_. "What's up?" He asked to the captain as if everything was normal.

"I can't believe you." Steve said. "Really? Here?" He gestured the kitchen.

"Weren't you upstairs with everybody?" Bucky asked.

"I'm-" Steve took a deep breath. "I'm never gonna be able to forget what I just saw." His brows furrowed. "Are you laughing?"

"How can I not?" Bucky replied with a grin. "I'm only bothered I didn't get to fini-"

"I need a hard drink." Steve said before walking out as well.

"Come on, Stevie." Bucky said as he catched up to him. "We've seen each other."

"I didn't walk on you naked Buck, I walked on you doing-" He blushed. "I'll never be able to look at [Y/N]."

"It's fine, you'll both forget about it." Bucky brushed off.

"I hope so with what I'm about to drink." They both got into the elevator.

"Well, I'll leave you to it. I need to find my doll before she packs her bags." He chuckled.

Bucky knew there was only one place where he'd find you at the moment. He knocked on the door of your room.

"Come in." You knew it was him as well.

"Come on, let's go downstairs. The party isn't over yet." Bucky said when he found you sitting on the floor in front of your bed.

"Are you crazy, I can never look at Steve ever again." You said. "I knew it, we shouldn't have gone into the kitchen and I should've made you wait 1 hour."

"It's Steve, he doesn't care and he's my best friend." Bucky tried to reassure you. He sat next to you.

"That's even worse."

"Is it though?" Bucky raised one eyebrow. "If it was Tony you would never hear the end of it." Your eyes widened in fear. "You know Steve won't tell anybody. Let's go downstairs or... we can finish what we started?" You turned your head and looked at your boyfriend in disbelief.

"Bucky you've lost your mind if you think I'm still anywhere near _that_ mood." You said.

"Downstairs it is then." He chuckled. The winter soldier got up and gave you his hand. "Come on, Steve knows but the others don't. If they don't see us they're gonna know what we were doing." You sighed deeply before grabbing his hand and getting up as well. "It's fine." He repeated as he saw the sadness in your expression.

"No, it's not. It's so embarrassing and shameful. You're the bad influence on me, not Nat."

"Wow, uh rude." He said in a fake offended voice and you couldn't help smiling a little.

"Okay, I guess it could've been worse." You finally admitted. "We could've been naked." Bucky smirked as you got out of the elevator. "I'm still avoiding Steve..." You added.

"Hey!" Sam saw you and Bucky arriving. "You missed Nat's song. It was something." He said cheerfully.

"Guess for another time." Bucky spoke for you both, you were still thinking about the kitchen incident.

"Talking about her, she's over there with Steve." Your eyes widened.

"I-I'm gonna-" You panicked, thankfully Thor walked by at that moment and you grabbed his arm. "Thor, tell me about the thing the other day..." You walked away with the God of thunder.

"Is she okay?" Sam asked Bucky. The winter soldier shrugged.

"Yeah, don't worry about it." He brushed off.

"What thing?" Thor asked you when you were away from the others.

"I-I forgot." You tried to smile to pretend everything was okay.

"[Y/N], are you okay?" The God of thunder asked you.

"Yes." You breathed deeply. "I'm fine."

"Come, I'll get you a drink." He smiled at you as you walked towards the bar. Thankfully it was desert.

"So, tell me. Hows's your night going?" You asked the Asgardian.

"It's good. I'm not gonna lie I wasn't really in the mood at the beginning but it's good to hang out with everyone."

"I'm really glad you're saying that." You clinked your glass with his before taking a sip. While you were drinking you turned your head and suddenly your eyes widened. "What the f-" Thor followed your gaze and then he saw it too. Sharon Carter. You forgot she was there as well. But that's not what bothered you. She was on the dancefloor dancing with _your man_. She wore a tight fitting red dress and, you couldn't deny it, she looked very sexy. You put your glass down on the counter and sighed very deeply.

"[Y/N], it's fine." Thor knew what was bothering you. You gasped when she ran her hand through Bucky's hair and you knew damn well what that did to him.

"He's not even pushing her away. What a jerk." You let out.

"[Y/N]-"

"Is his goal to piss me off every single day?" You were lost in your rage.

"[Y/N]!" Thor suddenly banged his fist on the counter and brought you back. You looked at him.

"I-I'm sorry." You blurted out. "I can't believe he's doing this and right in front of me. What did I expect? She's pretty, she's thin, she can dance-"

"Enough. You're pretty too-" Thor started.

"Don't be ridiculous." You cut him. You bit onto your lower lip to fight back your tears.

"Stop, don't cry. I agree it's a bit rude to dance with another woman in front of you but I really don't think Bucky did it to anger you."

"Well, it's not working because I **am** angry." You said. The God of thunder smiled before taking your hand.

"Well, would you like to dance with me?" He asked you and you turned your head to look at him.

"N-No, I'm not gonna use you to make him jealous. I'm not like that." You said.

"What if I told you it doesn't bother me. We're friends, right?" You smiled slightly.

"You're my best friend, Thor." You took his hand and got up from your seat. "Wait, this is ridiculous, I don't even know how to dance."

"There's one dance you know though?" He smiled at you. "F.R.I.D.A.Y. play a slow dance music." Thor asked the AI and you giggled slightly. He guided you towards the dancefloor and then he wrapped his arm around your waist, bringing you closely to him. You took his hand and you started slowly dancing. You didn't even care if other people were around, you didn't search for Bucky either.

"Thank you." You said discreetly to the Asgardian. "And I'm not just saying it because you suggested I make Bucky jealous but because I'm having a good time with you."

"I'm having a good time as well. I really appreciate what you did for me these last few days, trying to cheer me up and all." You smiled tenderly at him. You got really close to Thor during those ten days, you both said you wouldn't be sad because of your respective worries so you comforted each other. "Thor, we-" You looked at him as you danced. "We're not doing something we shouldn't right?" You had to ask.

"I'm not if you're not." What did that even mean? He saw the confusion in your face so he explained. "I meant what I said the other days, I don't have romantic feelings for you and to be honest I won't allow myself to."

"B-Because of my relationship?" You asked.

"Because my brother loves you." You bit onto your lower lip. You regretted asking. "I promised him I'd look after you and that's it."

"So, you're only friends with me because of that promise?" You stopped dancing and you lowered your gaze to your feet.

"What? No! I'm really friends with you." Thor explained. A tear streamed down your cheek.

"Hey! Why is my girl crying?!" Bucky suddenly walked between you both and pushed Thor on the shoulder. You left them there and ran out of the party room. You were hurt and confused, you didn't understand what the God of thunder meant and you were also angry at Bucky dancing with Sharon. "What did you say to her??" The winter soldier yelled at him.

"Is everything okay?" Sam asked as it started getting loud.

"Get your hands off me." Thor said firmly to Bucky.

"I've seen one Asgardian dance with my girl, I'm not letting another one put his hands on her." Bucky threatened.

"Then you should explain to her why you were dancing with another woman." Thor mocked.

"Hey! Hey, wow stop!" Sam got between them when suddenly Bucky pushed Thor again, Steve and Nat ran towards them.

"What's going on?!" She asked them.

"He made [Y/N] cry and she ran away!" The winter soldier pointed to the God of thunder.

"She was crying because she saw you dance with another woman!" He replied.

"Okay, enough. Disperse." Steve said to both of them. "Bucky, you should go with Nat find [Y/N]. The party is over." Nat grabbed Bucky's arm and lead him outside.

"She must be in her room." She pushed the elevator button.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. don't let anyone come into my room, I don't want to be bothered." You told the AI after you locked your door. You wondered if you were cursed to parties, why did all of them always end so badly?? You took off your shoes and your dress and then you hoped into your bed, you didn't care if you were in your underwear. Suddenly a knock at your door made you jump. You sighed deeply and hid yourself under the covers, you didn't care.

"[Y/N], open please." You heard Bucky speak. He was the second least person you wanted to see, in first was Thor and in third was Steve. Tonight was just too much.

"[Y/N], it's Nat." The redhaired woman said as she knocked on the door as well. Not tonight, you just wanted to be left alone at the moment.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. unlock [Y/N]'s door." Bucky ordered the AI.

"Miss [Y/N] doesn't want to be bothered. I will need permission from her to execute the order you just gave me."

"Ask her permission." Bucky told the AI.

"Denied." You told the AI. You heard the whole conversation.

"Miss [Y/N] has denied your request." The AI reported.

"She won't speak to you tonight, wait until tomorrow." Nat suggested to Bucky.

"You can leave, I'll stay here." He told her.

"Bucky, stop. You're just gonna annoy her and make it worse. She won't disappear in the night, talk to her tomorrow." She concluded before leaving him in the hallway.

You closed your eyes and let sleep consume you.

  
  


\---

  
  


"O-Oww..." You brought your hands to your chest when you woke up in the morning. You let out an annoyed sigh when you looked at your breasts. You forgot to take off the tape before sleeping. You pulled on it and removed them, your nipples were red and itchy, that glue was certainly not skin friendly. You hopped in the shower and took a warm and long bath before going downstairs to have breakfast. If there was one thing that nobody could take from you it was your breakfast.

"Hey, [Y/N]." Nat said to you when you entered the kitchen. You kept your head low, you didn't want to look at any of them, you hoped to not cross eyes with Bucky or Steve. Thankfully Thor was never there for breakfast.

"Hi." You said quickly and in a quiet voice. You poured yourself a bowl of cereal and took the empty seat next to Tony. You were digging into your food trying to ignore everything around you which was pretty easy since you were in your thoughts.

"So, uh, how do you guys feel after your mission? Still tired or..?" Bruce asked Bucky, Sam and Sharon who were also around the table.

"I'm good." Sam started. "A good night rest is all I need to feel energized again."

"I'm fine as well." Sharon replied. "Thanks to..." She dragged her eyes towards you. "I'm sorry, I forgot your name." You stared at her, you didn't know if she was playing you or something.

"Her name's [Y/N]." Bucky suddenly spoke.

"I'm surprised you forgot since he talked about her all the time." Sam noticed. You rolled your eyes discreetly, you didn't want to hear this conversation. You got up to refill your bowl of cereals, you were still hungry. You walked over the counter and while you were opening the box Sharon came next to you, you didn't even hear her.

"Sorry-" She leaned next to you and grabbed an apple in the fruits bowl that was resting on the counter. She watched you fill your bowl and then she just had to open her mouth. "You shouldn't have two bowls of cereals. Do you know how many sugar cubes are in there or in your milk?" You froze on your spot, your hands stopped moving as you listened to her. You closed the box and then dropped your bowl in the sink before walking out the kitchen. It's as if skinny people had a disease or something that just forced them to comment on everything fat people did.

"Where did she go??" Bucky asked Sharon.

"I don't know, I think she was done with her breakfast." The blonde woman replied before coming back around the table. She took a bite of her apple and smiled.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Miss, you are requested in the common room. It's an emergency." The AI warned you. You raised your head up from your pillow. You've been crying for one hour in your room. You got up from your bed and quickly went by the bathroom to dry your eyes before going out. The common room? That was the living space right? You pushed the elevator button and then walked in the room.

"[Y/N], take a seat." Tony said when you arrived, you were the last one they were waiting for. You noticed Thor was there as well but you ignored him, you went to sit next to Bruce.

"What's going on?" Nat asked.

"Mission. We're all on it. Sam, Sharon, you both as well. SHIELD already knows."

"What happened?" Steve asked.

"Terrorist attack, check this." He grabbed the tv remote and turned on the tv to the news channel so you could all check what was happening. You saw explosions, people running and screaming but suddenly your eyes focused on the messages displayed under the shocking images. All traces of blood left your face, you turned white.

"Oh my God, that's terrible." Sharon commentated. Your body was in the room but your mind not, you were gone. You felt sick, terribly sick.

"[Y/N]? You're shaking, are you okay?" Bruce worried next to you. "Don't watch if you can't take it." He thought you were shocked because of the images of terror playing on the tv, he was so far from the truth. "[Y/N]!" Bruce called you out louder since you weren't reacting, it drew the others attention.

"Doll, why are you crying?" You didn't even notice the tears streaming down your cheeks, you had difficulties to breathe, you skin was cold, you were shaking, you were having a panic attack. "Lay down." Bucky laid you on the couch after Bruce got up. "What's wrong??"

"I-It's..." You started. You closed your eyes to calm down but as soon as you re-opened them your gaze went back to the tv and to the small text playing under the images. There was no doubt about it.

"What?" Bucky asked you again as he gently put his palm against your cheek. You bit onto your lower lip as you cried.

"It's where I was born." You revealed.

 


	57. Kidnapped

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for 10k hits!

In the afternoon you all got ready and climbed inside a jet to go to your village. The others felt sorry for you but unfortunately a mission was a mission and an emergency was an emergency. For now innocent people's lives were in danger and you had to rescue them. It was your job, you were an Avengers.

You were in shock during the whole time since the announcement of the mission until now. Nat helped you pack what you needed and she handed you clothes that the SHIELD had made for you. Then she accompagned you to Tony's lab where he quickly checked your iron wristband in case you would have to activate it. This was a dangerous mission, nothing like you experienced before.

The only good side of you being in shock is that you couldn't react. You couldn't stress or be anxious, you just stared blankly and forward as you sat on a seat of the jet. Someone secured you with the belts of your seat and then you took off. Your body was here but your presence was not.

Everything about that village traumatized you, all your buried deep and hidden wounds had been re opened at the sight of the images of horror playing on the screen of the tv. You couldn't help thinking about them, the people you grew up with, the very people who made you like you were today: insecure.

Someone grabbed your hand while you were flying but you didn't react, you probably didn't even notice.

"You're freezing." Bucky noticed next to you. He got up and grabbed a blanket that he wrapped around your shoulders then he kneeled in front of you and put his palms against each side of your face. "Look at me." He asked you. He turned your face and made you look into his eyes. "No one is gonna hurt you, no one is going to touch you." You looked at him and when you finally regained your senses and saw it was Bucky you closed your eyes and started crying.

"I-I don't want-" You said quietly as you sobbed.

"Shh." He wrapped his arms around you and held you tightly against him.

"S-Something's gonna happen, I-I can feel it..." You continued sobbing on his shoulder. "P-Please Bucky... don't make me go..." You let out in a high pitched voice as you clinged on him and cried harder.

"I'm sorry doll, we don't have a choice." He said. "People are in danger, they need us, they need you." He tried to talk some sense into you. "It's been more than 10 years the people who hurt you are not there anymore and even if they are I won't let any of them approach you." He handed you a water bottle. "Drink please." He opened it and approached it to your lips. You took a few sips then he put the bottle in your hand and took back his seat next to you. He grabbed your free hand and didn't let go of it during the whole flight.

All your problems at the party seemed so far away now, Bucky dancing with another woman, Steve catching you having sex, Thor's words, Sharon's comment about your food. They were all gone, nothing could be worse than what you were about to face.

  
  


Two hours later you had finally landed. The jet stayed hidden from the middle of the village where the crisis was happening, you had to travel on land for those of you who couldn't fly. Tony, Sam and Thor flew while the rest of you travelled in a vehicle. Steve rode his motorcycle and you were in a van with Bucky, Bruce, Nat and Sharon.

"10 minutes." Sam warned you all as you approached the village.

"You stay close to Sharon." Bucky ordered you. "She has orders to not let anyone approach you, she's got your back."

"Alright, move." Nat spoke as she opened the car door. Bruce turned into the incredible Hulk and then Nat and Bucky clinged to him before he jumped into the village. You could hear screams from where you were.

You and Sharon ran through the villagers, most people you passed by seemed fine, they were all running away from the explosions.

"GET DOWN!" You instantly crouched down as Sharon shot a masked man that was running towards you. She approached him and took off his belt. "Grenades." She said. You let out the breath you were holding and continued your way deeper into the villager with her. You didn't even know what you were looking for but your body was. You knew where your feet were taking you. The house you grew up in. You turned to a street and suddenly you saw it.

"Help!" Someone screamed. Your heart beat fast inside your chest, you were on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

"Come, someone needs you." Sharon spoke as she passed in front of you. Your legs wobbled, you felt so weak.

"Please, help me!" It's been years but you recognized her, your recognized the look she gave you when you powers manifested. It was because of her, because of what she saw. The mother of the girl who bullied you. She crossed eyes with you and she recognized you as well. She turned her head and nodded to someone on the side. You didn't see who.

Suddenly you saw Sharon's body fly in front of you and then you felt a huge pain behind your head. You closed your eyes and dropped on the ground. Everything turned black and you lost consciousness.

  
  


\---

  
  


"WHERE IS SHE?!" Bucky screamed at Sharon who had just opened her eyes.

"Buck, stop!" Steve held him back. Nat helped Sharon sit straight.

"What happened? We found you here laying on the ground on your own." She quickly explained to her. Sharon winced as she tried to get up.

"Where's [Y/N]?!" The winter soldier shouted.

"Sharon, we can't find [Y/N], you were with her. What happened?" Nat asked her again.

"She..." The blonde woman let out a painful sigh as she held her waist. "She was right behind me, I think someone knew we were coming."

"What do you mean?" Steve asked.

"A woman started screaming for help and when we approached her I saw in her face she recognized [Y/N]. The woman gave a head nod to someone who was hiding behind this batiment." She pointed at it. "I turned my head towards it and before I knew it I got hit and I guess I lost consciousness since my head hurts like hell." She raised her head towards Bucky. "I'm sorry, I don't know what happened after." Bucky clenched his fist so tightly his knuckles turned white.

"You had one job!!" The winter soldier angrily kicked a piece of broken stone on the ground and sent it flying.

"I can't find her." Sam said as he joined them on the ground. "Thor and Tony are still searching for her from above but uh..." He sighed deeply. "I don't wanna bring the bad news but I don't think she's here anymore."

"I think you're right. While we were fighting them here suddenly they got an order and they all dispersed." Steve explained.

"You think [Y/N] was their mission?" Nat asked.

"I'm starting to think maybe this place wasn't a coincidence. Maybe they knew she'd come here. She's a new Avengers member but if we're being monitorized it's not impossible they heard of her and what she can do."

"We were so fucking naive." Bucky spoke. "She didn't want to come, I should've listened to her."

"Buck, stop. It's not your fault, we're gonna find her." Steve said.

"If they need her powers they also need her alive." Nat added. Thor, Tony and Bruce joined them.

"So?"

"Nothing. She's not here."

"Do we know who we're fighting against?" Steve asked.

"I'm afraid you're not gonna like the answer." Tony replied with a grave look on his face.

"Who was it?" Bucky asked.

"Rumlow." Tony revealed.

"I beg your fucking pardon?" Bucky's eyes widened.

"I thought he was dead." Steve said in disbelief.

"It was him, I saw his face. He was wearing a mask but he dropped it." Tony said as he pulled the object and showed it to them.

"Fuck!" Bucky cursed loudly. He knew how dangerous Brock Rumlow was, if he had his hands on you he had to act quick to save you from him and his men.

"We have to go, the sun is setting. SHIELD is on their way to help the villagers who've been wounded." Tony said.

"Come on, Bucky. She's not here, we'll think of a plan to rescue her." Steve said as he put his hand on his best friend's shoulder.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Hnng..." You winced painfully as you moved your head, you opened your eyes and you had no idea where you were. Suddenly fear struck you, you were tied up to a chair and it was nighttime. You rememberd the mission and the face of the woman who started it all and made your life a living hell.

"You've finally woken up." A man spoke to you. You didn't recognize it, you had no idea who he was and what he wanted. "[Y/N], right?" You didn't reply. "I believe I asked you a question." You stayed silent so he approached you until he was in your view and then he slapped your cheek. The pain made you yell, you didn't expect it. "Here's some rules. When I ask you something, you reply truthfully, everything goes well. If you don't or if you lie, I hurt you." You held back your tears, you were so scared. Where were the others?? "So, are you [Y/N]?"

"… Yes." You replied.

"And you're a **mutant**?" Your eyes widened.

"I'm a... what?" You asked.

"I said reply, don't answer with another question." He said.

"I-I never heard that word you just said." You replied truthfully.

"Mutant?" He chuckled slightly. "Tell me about your powers."

"I don't have powers-"

_**Smack!** _

The mysterious man who kidnapped you hit you again.

"I told you to not lie to me." He repeated as he roughly grabbed your chin between his fingers and made you look at him. "Tell me about your powers." You held back a sob.

"I-I can heal people..." You revealed.

"How?"

"By touching them with my hands..."

"Since when?"

"I-It started when I was 12..."

"Why did you go to the Avengers?" He asked after he marked a little pause.

"SHIELD found me and offered me an opportunity."

"Why did you accept?"

"I had nowhere to go." You bit onto your lower lip before you dared to ask a question. "How do you know about me?" You asked him. He smiled in amusement.

"I know about Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes." Your eyes widened. What did your kidnapper want from them? "You see I was planning on taking my revenge on them for this-" You were in the dark so you couldn't see it until now but when he stepped in the light you saw it. A burned mark on the side of his face. "But then we found out about you."

"H-How?" You asked. He stepped away from you to grab something and then he came back in front of you.

"You remember her?" A chill went down your spine as he showed you a photo. The undercover agent who was reporting in secret to SHIELD. The one you had taken the report from when you were with Bucky at the cabin. You nodded slightly. "Do you know what we do to traitors?" He creepily whispered into your ear. He showed you a second picture and you screamed at the sight before closing your eyes. It was a butchery. You were terrified, you had to get out of there. "Anyway, we made some research about you when we noticed you lived with the Avengers and then we found out where you were born. If at first no one knew who you were we finally found someone who did." You were so angry. Once again that woman had ruined your life. "The Avengers... You think you're so strong and so no one will come to find you huh? You've been seen everywhere. Beaches, theme parks, restaurants, malls, bowling clubs... If they wanted you just for themselves they should've kept you locked in..." He chuckled. "Which is exactly what we're gonna do with you."

"They'll find me." You let out too quickly and you regretted it when he hit your face again. You let out another shriek which made him laugh. The man walked away from you and then he grabbed a chair that he put in front of you before sitting on it. You noticed he held a knife as well.

"Heal." He ordered you after he cut the ties around your wrists. "Don't try anything funny or I promise you you're gonna deeply regret it."

"Wher-" You panicked when you looked at your wrist. The iron wristband was gone. How?? Tony told you that if someone tried to forcefully remove it from you it would activate.

"Do you take me for an idiot? I know Stark's technology. It's been safely removed and deactivated. You can't go anywhere and you can't call for help." He smirked. You wanted to die, you had no more hope. "Heal." He repeated. You didn't move so he grabbed his knife and ran it on your forearm. You screamed in pain as you held your arm. "The next thing I'm gonna do if you upset me again is cut one of your fingers." You cried as you put your hand against the side of his face. You closed your eyes and let your powers out.

  
  


\---

  
  


"This box was delivered here..." Tony announced as he walked into the living space where everyone else was. Everyone was brainstorming about a plan to rescue you from Rumlow's hands.

"It's from... him?" Steve asked.

"Let me see it." Bucky said as he jumped from the couch.

"Uh... I should do that." Nat said.

"Aren't you afraid there's a bomb in there or something?" Sam asked.

"I doubt it, if Rumlow wanted to attack the tower he wouldn't do it with this box." Steve said.

"Who wants to open it first?" Tony asked.

"Bucky you shouldn't- Wait until one of us confirms what's inside." Bruce said.

"What, you think there's a body part in there?" Sharon asked and suddenly everyone turned their heads towards her except Bucky who's eyes widened. He didn't even consider that could very well be a possibility. After all Rumlow was the most dangerous man _alive_ he knew.

"I'll do it." Nat grabbed the box from Tony's hands and then put it on her lap. She took a deep breath and then slowly opened it. "Oh no..."

"What is it?" Thor asked. Nat turned the box and showed them what was inside.

"I-Is that her-" Steve asked.

"Yeah." Tony confirmed. "It's her suit."

"No wonder we couldn't contact her when we tried earlier." Bruce sighed deeply.

"Crap, it's not even damaged. They safely removed it." Tony cursed. Bucky was seething with rage.

"Fuck!" He cursed as well before throwing over one of the couches in the living space.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. I need you to check who sent the box, who delivered it, which post-service delivery they used, find me everything about this box." Tony ordered the AI.

"Yes, boss." It replied.

"SHIELD are already checking footages from the security cameras in the village and even from the satellites." Steve said.

"We'll find her." Nat said confidently. "We'll rescue [Y/N]."

 


	58. Mutant

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: This chapter contains some noncon elements, nothing very heavy but I prefer to warn you all.

"Why is it taking so long?" The kidnapper asked you.

"Your face is damaged." You replied. "The bigger the wound the longer it takes." You explained.

"Why didn't you heal your arm?" You stayed silent. You saw him approach his knife to you again.

"I-It doesn't work on me..." You revealed. He raised one eyebrow in surprise.

"Tell me everything about your power. And don't forget any details." He ordered you.

"I-I use my hands, healing cuts takes seconds, healing broken bones can take 8 to 12 hours, maybe more maybe less." You explained. "Healing drains my energy, I can't do it all the time and for a long time without taking breaks and resting." You added in case he planned on milking you like a cow. "It doesn't work on me and I can't make bones or limbs grow."

"Is that all?"

"I can't heal psychological wounds either, if someone has depression or suffers from memory loss I can't do anything about it." You said. He looked at you. "It's all." You concluded. Twenty minutes later you moved your hand from his cheek to his ear and suddenly he seized your wrist and you gasped as you flinched. It surprised you. He let go of your wrist and let you continue healing him. Ten minutes later you were done and you brought your hand back to yourself. He got up and walked to the bathroom that was in the room you were in. He checked his face in the mirror and he came back. You didn't know if he was happy or anything, he didn't comment on your powers but he didn't look... disappointed.

"You're gonna stay in this room." He said to you.

"W-Who are you?" You dared to ask.

"The name's Brock Rumlow." You didn't know who he was, that's the first time you heard that name.

"Can you tell me... about what you said earlier?" You pushed your luck a little further since he seemed in a better mood. "The word you called me." You precised.

"We'll see about that tomorrow if you behave." He smirked. Rumlow walked out of the room and locked it behind him.

You got up from your chair and you winced, your body hurt all over. You walked around the room you were in, you had two chairs, a desk and a bed. There was also a small bathroom linked to it, it looked a bit dirty like everything in your room but at least it had a shower stall, a mirror, a sink and toilets. You noticed there was also a window but when you tried to open it it was sealed firmly, you couldn't get out. You knew it was useless but you tried the door anyway, locked as well.

One hour later Rumlow came back to check on you. You were curled up on your bed and crying of course. You missed Bucky, you missed your friends and you were terrified of what was about to happen to you in here. You had no idea what were Rumlow's plans about you.

"For you." He dropped a sandwich and a water bottle on the desk. "If you need something just bang on the door. And that's for emergencies only." He said before leaving you alone again. Of course, he didn't forget to lock the door.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Are you okay?" Steve asked Bucky. The captain had joined the winter soldier on the balcony where he'd spent the whole evening on.

"How can you ask me that?" He replied. "She must be so fucking terrified and there's nothing I can do about it. It's killing me. I can't hold her, I can't reassure her-" Bucky held back a sob. "I couldn't even protect her." He let out before crying.

"Hey, we'll rescue her okay?" Steve approached him and took Bucky in his arms. "I know it's hard at the moment for you, for her, but we will get her back."

"She didn't want to go, she begged me and I told her we had no choice." He let go of his best friend and faced forward to stare at the view in front of him. "If anyth-" He breathed deeply. "I'll never forgive myself." Bucky hurt all over, he had a knot in his stomach and he was extremely anxious. "I'm gonna kill him, Steve. Rumlow and everyone involved in that terrorist attack."

"You should rest. I know you don't want to at the moment but think of it like that: at least you'll be at your best when we get news about Rumlow's location." Steve put his hand on Bucky's shoulder. "If you're too tired when we rescue her it's not gonna be good."

Bucky left the balcony in silence and walked out of the room.

  
  


\---

  
  


The day after Rumlow came back into your room, he looked at you before glancing at your desk. You hadn't touched your food.

"Eat or I will force you and trust me you're not gonna like it." He closed the door back behind him and left you.

You had cried all night. At some point exhaustion took you and you fell asleep on the rock hard bed you were on. You were cold and afraid, your days at the tower seemed so far away now. You had really taken it all for granted. You cursed your powers and even your appearance. Why did you have to suffer all your life?

You thought back of what Rumlow called you. A mutant. What was that? Did it have to do something with your powers? Why did he know about it and the Avengers didn't? You wondered for how long has Rumlow been watching you. He told you he wanted to get revenge on Steve and Bucky so were you going to be his way to that??

You wiped your tears before getting up to take the food he brought you last night. It would be wiser to cooperate for now until you find a way to get out of there. And if he was going to make you use your powers again you needed nutrients. The sandwich looked dry and not that appetizing but other than that it was fine. You took a bite and then washed it down your throat with your water bottle.

One hour later a man you've never seen came into your room.

"Come." He ordered you as he firmly grabbed your arm. You winced but followed him, you had no choice. You took a look at the place you were in. It looked like a military base and when you looked by the windows you noticed you were surrounded by trees. The place was well hidden.

"Ah!" You yelped in pain when the man threw you on the ground. You raised your eyes up and found Rumlow looking at you before he glanced at his colleague behind you and gestured him to make you stand.

"Don't touch me!" You yelled at him and stood up on your own. You closed your eyes as he was about to hit you but Rumlow stopped him. You just glared at each other. You heard a few snickers around you so you looked around and saw several men in the new room you were in. Some of them were standing, others were sitting and a few were laying in beds. You had a bad feeling.

"You have the whole day to heal all of them." Rumlow spoke to you and your eyes widened.

"I-I can't!" You protested. He got up and towered you with all his might to seem more menacing. His face was just inches away from yours. Now that you were in daylight you took a better look at his face. If he wasn't your kidnaper and dangerous you'd almost find him handsome. There was no traces of his burning marks anymore.

"You will." He said as he stared into your eyes. He terrified you, you bit onto your lower lip to stop it from trembling. Brock Rumlow turned his head and nodded to the man behind you. He forcefully took your arm and guided you towards a wounded man.

"W-Where..?" You asked quietly. The wounded man rolled up his sleeve and showed you his arm. He had a bullet hole in his forearm. You took a deep breath before slowly putting your shaking hand on his injury. You closed your eyes and started healing him. Soon enough you felt something poke against your palm. You opened your eyes and removed the bullet with your fingers before finishing healing. His wound closed and there was no trace of it anymore. The man smiled in amusement as he looked at forearm before throwing a look of satisfaction at Rumlow.

"Good job." He praised as he came behind you and put a hand on your shoulder. It didn't feel reassuring at all, you flinched when he touched you. "Next one." He said. You stepped in front of a creepily looking man who was sitting on a bed.

"Where?" You asked again. What he did next made you want to puke.

"I'm aching here." He laughed loudly as he took a hold of his crotch. "Heal with your mouth." He continued laughing and you heard others next to him laugh too. It was too much for you, you acted before thinking. You raised your arm and slapped him across the cheek. Rumlow's man behind you violently gripped your hair and threw you on the ground, you screamed in pain as he dragged you on the floor.

"She can bite, I like it." Rumlow said as he smirked. "Get her up, we don't have time." He ordered. You cried as he guided you to the next wounded man. Thankfully this one was silent, he laid his leg in front of you, his tibia was badly bruised. You sobbed quietly as you put your palms against his leg and healed. "Next." You heard Rumlow say behind you. It just kept on and on. You healed most of his men. You didn't know if he took notes of what you said to him but he only made you heal his men with the not so bad injuries You expected him to ask miracles from you but he didn't.

"I'll let you touch mine if I can touch yours." Another gross comment from one of the injureds. This one had a stabbing wound on his chest. He raised his hand and put it against your chest, you made a disgusted face and tried to take his hand away from you but Rumlow's man behind you kept you firmly in place, you knew that if you hit another one of theirs they would hurt you again so you gritted your teeth and tried to heal him quickly so you would move to the next one and stop being touched.

"Hhh..." You winced as he fondled you breasts. Your eyes were closed while you were healing his wound, you tried so hard to think of something else. You started crying hoping Bucky would save you soon. This place was a nightmare, you would go crazy if you had to stay with those digusting men for any longer. You were finally done and so you moved to the next one. Before you walked away the gross man slapped your butt which made you gasp loudly, you blushed in shame as some of them around you laughed again. You've never felt more humiliated in your entire life.

"I wanna touch her too." This was never going to end. The man behind you and Rumlow said nothing which made you want to die. The injured one in front of you tried to slip his hand under your shirt but you grabbed his wrist and stopped him.

"N-NO!" You yelled in fear.

"Stop moving, bitch!" The one behind you held you firmly by your arms. The man in front of you grabbed the hem of your shirt with his two hands and pulled it up to reveal your naked stomach.

"She's fat but I don't mind it." He grinned as he looked at your body, you cried harder in fear of what they would do to you next. He was about to grab the sports bra you were wearing but suddenly something got his attention. He took between his fingers the pendant you wore around your neck and pulled on it to take it off from you before throwing it at Rumlow. He quickly understood how it worked and so he opened it. Brock chuckled in satisfaction as he looked inside of it.

"This is just getting better." He said as he looked at you.

"Give it back!" You cried. The man behind you forcefully grabbed your chin.

"I got my perfect revenge against Bucky Barnes." He smirked and it terrified you.

  
  


\---

  
  


You healed the whole day and you were exhausted. At some point Rumlow made you stop to feed you and let you nap for a few hours but then you just re healed. You heard more gross comments, they kept groping you but finally you were done and they locked you back in your room. You curled up on your bed and cried hard. You hoped with everything you had that someone would find you. You had hope in the Avengers and SHIELD, they possessed the strongest technology and worked with the strongest heroes, someone had to find you... Right?

You felt so gross and you wanted to shower but you had no spare clothes, no towels, no products and mostly you were afraid they would walk in on you naked while you cleaned yourself. Rumlow didn't give you back your necklace and he didn't speak to you. At some point he left you alone with his men while you healed them. They got bolder when he wasn't around...

Before midnight you heard your door unlock and then someone came in. You were so terrified you backed up on your bed. It was Rumlow.

"You did a good job today." You stayed silent. He came closer and sat on the edge of your bed. "A mutant is a human who's born with an X-gene, that gene is a mutation that causes your body to develop abilities that humans without the X-gene can't have." You listened closely to him as he explained to you what a mutant is.

"A-Are you a mutant too?" You dared to ask.

"No." He replied.

"A-Am I the only one?" He chuckled, you knew it was a mockery. You felt stupid asking.

"I'm surprised SHIELD didn't tell you anything considering they have one like you on their side." Your eyes widened. You didn't know who he was talking about.

"A-A healer?" You asked.

"Healing is just one of the many abilities out there. Though it's the first time I've seen a mutant with a power like yours." He said. "Each mutant has a power of their own and only one."

"W-What can mutants do?" You asked.

"Fly, spit fire, create ice, control animals, it's endless." You were amazed. There were other people like you out there. You wondered if what he said was true? Did SHIELD or even the Avengers really know the truth? Then why hide it from you? You gasped when Rumlow suddenly moved, you were lost in your thoughts but thankfully he just got up. "Sleep. Tomorrow you're back at it." He ordered you before walking out of your room and locking the door behind him. Your nightmare wasn't over. You laid on your back and closed your eyes. Hopefully thinking about happy stuff with Bucky would make you fall asleep faster. At least it kept you sane.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I literally cried the whole time I wrote the next 4 chapters. I hope you enjoy them though.


	59. Coded Text

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: noncon elements.

"God, it's been 3 days. I hope she's holding on." Bruce said. The Avengers were around the table having lunch. Their only subject of conversation was you, of course.

"I think the worst thing is this, feeling so helpless." Steve said.

"How's Bucky by the way?" Sam asked.

"He hasn't left [Y/N]'s room. I don't even think he slept, he just stays there." The captain explained.

"I don't think it's doing any good to him." Sharon said.

"Well, good luck getting him out. I tried." Nat raised one eyebrow. "He's laying on her bed, holding her pillow. It's really sad."

"Tony hasn't left the lab either." Bruce added. "He's constantly yelling at SHIELD agents, asking them why it's taking so long to track her."

"I think Thor's not doing good either." Sam noticed. "I really wish we had any lead, anything to actually go out there and do something."

"We have to be patient." Steve sighed. "Though I agree, it's getting more and more unbearable."

"I really hope they haven't hurt her." Bruce passed a hand on his face.

"Stop. We can't think about stuff like that." Nat interrupted him before getting up. "I'm gonna go check on Bucky. He needs to eat something." She walked out. In the hallway she sighed deeply and wiped a tear off her cheek. The winter soldier wasn't the only one suffering from your disappearance. "It's me." She announced herself after knocking on your door and entering your room. "You need to eat, come downstairs."

"I'm not hungry." Bucky replied.

"I don't care." She stated. "You look like crap, you need to be ready if we have to go."

"And when's that?!" He suddenly yelled. "It's been 3 days! For all I know she could be dead!"

"Stop talking like that!" Nat yelled as well. "They need her alive, she's still alive and she's counting on us to rescue her!"

"N-Natasha..." His eyes widened when he noticed the tears in her eyes. She sat on the edge of the bed next to him.

"I said-" She took a deep breath. "We'll rescue [Y/N]."

"I miss her so much I just want her back." Bucky cried.

"I do too, okay? We all do." She said to him. "Everyone is working hard to track her, yes it's been 3 days but we're not giving up. You're not either." Nat got up from the bed. "Now go take a shower and come downstairs to eat. She needs you, don't give up on her."

"I'm sorry." He said and she sighed.

"You have to be strong for her. She's counting on you."

Bucky took a hold of himself and then he got up from your bed. He decided to listen to Nat and stop moping around in your room. She left as well and he headed to his own room. The winter soldier cleaned himself, shaved and then he stepped out of his bathroom to put on some clothes. Something got his attention when he was dressed. Something on his desk. His phone was emitting a light. Bucky's heart started racing and he felt tears appear in his eyes. He grabbed his phone with a shaking hand and unlocked it. He had gotten a message.

  
  


" _Its [Y/N], I gope I pememberd wour ntmber coppectly. If ur not Aucky Barnes, pjease whodver you ard, contact Tmny Starj and brgng him wour phome._ "

  
  


Bucky dropped on his knees before realizing there was no time to waste. He got up and ran down the stairs before bursting in the dining room.

"She sent me a message! [Y/N] messaged me!"

"What?!" The others got up from their chairs.

"Tony! Where's Tony?!" Bucky looked around the table looking for him.

"He's in the lab. Quick, let's go!" They all followed the winter soldier as he was already on his way there. Suddenly everyone barged in the lab.

"What's going on?!" Tony let out angrily.

"It's [Y/N]! She messaged me!" He handed his phone to Tony with shaking hands to show him the message. "I think it's coded though." Tony's eyes widened when he read it.

"It's not a code. She sent the text from an old phone. The keypad is limited, she was probably in a hurry and didn't have time to properly type her text. F.R.I.D.A.Y. track the signal from where the message was sent. Report everything to me and SHIELD as well. Do it as fast as you can. It's a priority." Tony placed Bucky's phone in a machine for it to get scanned.

"Yes, boss." The AI replied. Bucky dropped on his knees and stayed down this time. He held his face between his hands and started crying.

"We're gonna find her, we'll bring her home tonight." Steve said to his best friend.

"She thinks she's stupid and yet she's the smartest person I know." Bucky let out between two sobs.

"Alright. Everyone get ready." Steve ordered to all the Avengers members in the lab. "As soon as we get coordinates, we're leaving."

"I'm gonna go warn Thor." Bruce said before leaving the lab.

"Buck?" Steve watched him get up. The winter soldier quickly regained his senses, now they were in the real deal. You were coming back tonight. He wiped his tears.

"I'm gonna get ready." He announced before walking out.

  
  


\---

  
  


Earlier that day you had woken up when Rumlow's handyman had barged into your room. He didn't even care if you were half asleep, he grabbed your arm and dragged you out.

"Ow!" You winced. You were exhausted, you've been healing for three days straight. You were also mentally tired, you hated this place, you hated its people, you hated Rumlow. You've been mocked, humiliated, groped, treated like shit basically.

"Heal." The man ordered you. He guided you to another one of his colleague who was missing a leg. You thought he wanted you to magically grow his limb but upon closer inspection you noticed that the wound was infected. You made a face of disgust as you saw how badly it looked. You took a deep breath before touching it. You felt so gross. You hadn't showered in three days and you could still feel the other men's disgusting hands on you.

When you were done healing a few more men Rumlow came to get you. He took your arm and guided you to a kitchen. You supposed it was one because the room had a stove and a fridge but there was also a small table and chairs around it. Someone else was there though.

"Leave us." Rumlow ordered to the man. Maybe he was the cook, he seemed old and didn't look like a soldier like most of the other men. Rumlow pulled a chair and gestured you to sit on it. You obeyed. "You've done a good job for the past few days." You gulped as you looked into his eyes. What did he want? "People usually say thank you when they're being praised." He said.

"I didn't do it to help you." You replied. "I'm being forced." Rumlow smirked. Suddenly he got up and moved behind you. He pulled a knife that he held against your throat. You let out a small whimper of fear when you felt the blade against your skin.

"You're getting bolder." Rumlow said next to your face. "I've been too nice with you if you think you can talk to me in that tone." He was amused. "Now, we're gonna do it again." He walked back to his seat. "You've done a good job for the past few days." He repeated.

"… T-Thank you..." You let out quietly.

"See? It wasn't so hard, was it?" He grinned. Rumlow took a plate that was resting on the table and moved it in front of you. "Eat. Then you're gonna take a shower." You felt like crying.

He stayed with you while you were eating.

"C-Can I have some water... please?" You asked. He got up and filled you a glass of water from the sink before bringing to you. "T-Thank you." Rumlow sat on his chair and kept staring at you. You hated it.

"Are you done?" He asked you after some time. You nodded. "Get up." You bit onto your lower lip in fear of what was about to come. He took your arm and guided you back to- that wasn't your room. Was it his? It was bigger and looked more comfortable. "Go into the bathroom." Oh no. You stepped in. His bathroom was clean unlike yours and he had a bathtub. He followed you. "Strip." Rumlow ordered.

"W-What?" Your eyes widened and you prayed to whoever was out there that you heard him wrong.

"Take off your clothes." You shaked your head, you were terrified. "I'm gonna say it one last time. Take off your clothes." He sounded very menacing and it sent a creepy chill down your spine. You started crying as you slowly removed your clothes. You took off your shoes and socks, then unbuckled your pants. Rumlow moved behind you and started filling the bathtub with water. You dropped your pants on the floor with shaking hands, when you were left in your underwear you didn't dare to move. "All your clothes." He said as he turned back to look at you.

"P-Please, n-no..." You said quietly as you sobbed.

"Do you want me to do it myself?" He asked. "Take them off and go in." He pointed to the bathtub. You didn't want him to touch you so you obeyed again. You took off your sports bra and then covered your breasts with your arm before taking off your panties as well. You hid yourself as much as you could with your hands then you entered the bath. The water was a tad too hot but at this point it mattered the least. Rumlow handed you a washcloth and a bar of soap. "Clean yourself." He ordered you before sitting on the toilets and watching you. You cried quietly as you washed your body, he watched you the whole time, never taking his eyes off you. You've never felt more exposed. Suddenly Rumlow got up and he took off his jacket and his shirt before coming closer to you.

"N-No, p-please don't-" You sobbed harder. He grabbed the washcloth and the soap from your hands before taking your arm, he scrubbed your skin surprinsgly softly (probably because of the scar on your forearm he had made) but it didn't stop you from shaking and being afraid. He took your other arm and scrubbed it as well. When he was done with one arm, you hid your breasts with the other but when he was done with both arms he spoke again.

"Put your arms on the edges of the bathtub." You shaked your head. "You better obey me if you don't want me to drown you."

"P-Please..." You begged him again thinking it was gonna change anything. It won't.

"If you make me repeat myself one more time you're really going to regret it." He threatened you. You started sobbing again as you slowly moved your arms out of the way. Rumlow carefully guided the washcloth to your chest and he started gently washing you. It was perverted, you could feel it, he was _fondling_ you. He stayed way too long on your nipple, feeling it against his hand through the washcloth.

"Hhn!" You flinched when he brought his second hand to your chest. He didn't even care about the washcloth anymore, he grabbed your breasts and then circled your nipples with his thumbs. You wanted to die at this exact moment.

"Stop whining, I'm not even being rough with you." He smirked. "I bet you're enjoying it even." Your eyes were closed, you didn't even want to look at him, you just hoped he would soon enough get tired of groping you.

"Boss!" You heard someone in his bedroom call him. Rumlow got up and you covered your chest. He closed the bathroom door behind him and then went to check what his man wanted. You cried as you held your shaking body between your hands. Suddenly you heard a vibrating noise and you raised your head up. Was that a phone?? Did he leave his phone here? You got up from the bathtub and leaned over, you rememberd he took off his jacket and shirt and left them there. You searched inside his pockets and you almost screamed when you had a phone between your hands. You had to be very quick he could return at any moment. You had to warn the Avengers of your location.

Rumlow possessed an old phone, it wasn't a smartphone so fortunately for you it didn't need unlockment. You clicked on the buttons to send a text. You didn't have time to call the police, you didn't know where you were and they wouldn't be as effective as Tony Stark who possessed the best technology on the planet.

During those ten days where Bucky was on the mission you had a lot of time to memorize his phone number since you were waiting for a text from him everyday. You composed a number that you really hoped was his and then typed your message.

"Fuck!" You cursed. Old phone meant no keyboard. It was those fifteen touches keypad that you had to push several times to reach a letter you wanted. Rumlow was coming back soon though so you typed as fast as you can and too bad if you mispelled some words, if you were lucky enough the text was going to Bucky's phone and since you were missing he would understand your text. You prayed you didn't get the number wrong otherwise it might take more time if it was a stranger getting your text. When you were done you quickly quit the messaging program and then wiped the phone from the few droplets of water. You put it back in Rumlow's jacket and then pretended to wait in your bath. You started crying, you had a small hope you would be rescued soon.

"You're still fucking crying?" Rumlow asked as he came back. If only he knew it was for a different reason. He put his shirt back on. "Finish cleaning yourself." He ordered you. You did as he said, you felt a bit lighter but the fact that his eyes didn't leave you still made you extremely uncomfortable. You washed your hair after he handed you a bottle of shampoo and finally you were done.

"I-I'm finished." You said quietly.

"Get out then." You gulped. You didn't want him to see you anymore and you had nothing to cover yourself with.

"C-Can I have a towel... please?" You asked.

"It's in the other room." He smirked. You knew he wouldn't fetch it to you and if you asked he would laugh. You took a deep breath and put your hands on the edges of the bathtub to help yourself stand. You knew he had seen parts of you but there was nothing you could do. You covered your breasts and your crotch and when you walked past him to go into the other room you covered your butt. Rumlow got up and followed you into his room. You took the towel that rested on his bed and wrapped it around your body. When you turned around he was inches away from your face. You let out a quiet gasp as he stared into your eyes with a smile that creeped you. He replaced a strand of wet hair behind your ear. "You're fat but you're not that unattractive." He said. You were terrified. "Your days could get a lot more easier around here if you... _cooperated_." What did that mean? You didn't plan on staying here anyway. Your place was with the Avengers, with your friends, with Bucky. You didn't know what he planned to do with you and how long he intended on keeping you around here but you were certain you would not keep serving him.

While you were lost in your thoughts suddenly something brought you back. Rumlow was kissing you.

"Hhh!" You gasped and pushed him away with your palms pressed against his shoulders. You brought your hand to your lips as you stared at him in shock. You couldn't believe he just did that.

"You can rest here for the afternoon." He said to you. "But tonight I'm coming for you." You shivered in fear, you knew what he meant.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You have no idea how many times I rewrote this chapter. I planned on adding way more heavy elements but finally decided against it. It's not my type to write this kind of things and I didn't want to hurt my reader anymore that she already was LOL  
> Buuuut since I still wrote it and didn't want to throw it away I created a separated fic. So it's a Rumlow x reader that you can read at the link below if you're interested. You can check the descriptions and tags on the work itself.  
> https://archiveofourown.org/works/20037517


	60. Rescued

"We got them." Tony raised his head up. "The coordinates. We have a location."

"Everyone, move." Steve ordered everybody.

The Avengers climbed into the jet and then they took off. Your night could either end well or very badly.

"We only have one chance everybody." Bruce said.

"Remember your priority: rescuing [Y/N]. First we secure her, we'll deal with Rumlow and his men only when she's safe." The captain gave them their orders. "Our best chance would be Tony, Thor or Sam. I don't think Rumlow got someone on his team that could follow you in the sky."

"Is it safe to fly with them though?" Nat asked.

"You can be sure that once I get my grip on [Y/N] I won't release her." Thor said.

"It can get difficult if they start shooting at me." Sam said.

"That's why some of us will be on the ground. We'll have your backs. Nat, Bucky, Sharon, you're our best shooters. If one of you three get [Y/N]-" Steve pointed at the flying team. "Warn everyone and we'll get back."

"The satellite images showed some sort of military base." Tony said.

"We infiltrate it discreetly, silence anyone that sees us then we search for [Y/N] until we get her. I trust you all to remember the priority." Steve said as he glanced at Bucky. "First [Y/N], Rumlow comes later."

"Also we should expect Rumlow knowing about us coming, I doubt we're gonna get that lucky." Nat added.

"[Y/N] might be in big trouble right now if he figured she warned us." Bruce said.

"We don't have time to lose. Hopefully he doesn't move her from their current location until we arrive." Steve said.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. hit the gas." Tony ordered to the AI.

"Yes, boss."

  
  


\---

  
  


When you opened your eyes you looked around you and rememberd where you were. Rumlow's bedroom. You curled up on the bed and started crying again as you rememberd what he did to you. You felt so gross. You were cold and naked, when you sat you found clothes on the edge of the bed. Your clothes? They were clean somehow. You didn't question it and quickly put them on. You tried opening the door but of course, it was locked.

A chill went down your spine as you rememberd what Rumlow has said to you. If the Avengers didn't come to rescue you tonight he was going to come for you.

Suddenly you heard voices get louder outside and inside as well as heavy stomping. You heard the door unlock and then it flew open as a very furious Rumlow stepped towards you.

"I showed you what we do to traitors." He said before raising his arm in the air. The next thing you knew you were on the ground screaming in pain. Rumlow had slapped you so hard across the cheek your skin there split open. You held your bloody cheek as you cried in pain. "Take her to the basement." He ordered to that one man who absolutely couldn't stand your guts. He grabbed you by your hair and dragged you on the floor, you held onto your head as you screamed in pain. "Wait-" Rumlow stopped him. Suddenly he pulled out his knife and stabbed your ankle with it. You screamed even harder. "Go now." He ordered.

You were pretty sure that's how you were going to die. Of blood loss and pain. That Rumlow back there in the room was the man you should've been more careful about, not the him he showed you during lunchtime. After being dragged around for some time you were tossed inside a cell and locked up. You had heard one thing while you were being dragged though. Rumlow's men were running around and getting ready because-

_**The Avengers were coming.** _

You cried in your cell, because of the pain of your physical wounds, but mostly of relief. Finally you were going to be rescued.

  
  


"They're getting agitated and moving around." Sam warned his teammates as he watched the base from above.

"They know we're here." Steve told the others in the jet.

"Shoot them all, don't leave any of them alive." Bucky said as he picked up his gun.

"We're landing, everyone get ready." Bruce said.

"Sharon. With me on the motorcycle." Steve said to her. "Bucky, Nat, with Bruce." They all nodded. Tony, Thor and Sam were already outside. "Let's go."

  
  


You had no idea what was happening outside. You heard shootings, explosions, screams, yells and stompings. You felt at war which was surprising since you've never actually witnessed one. Suddenly the shootings got closer. The two men who were guarding your cell ran towards the door, you approached the door to see what was going on but they were all gone, you were alone. You could heard fighting but you had no idea who they were fighting against and who was winning. Suddenly it all stopped. No more sounds.

"[Y/N]?!" A familiar voice called out to you and your eyes widened.

"T-Thor?? Is that you?! I'm here!" You shouted. You heard running and then you finally saw him. You broke down in tears, at long last you were free.

"Shh, it's okay, you're fine." He reassured you as he grabbed the hand you were handing him through the bars. "Get back, I'm gonna break it." You walked away from the door and crouched down to protect yourself from the impact. Thor sent his hammer flying against the door and it broke down in thousand pieces.

"T-Thor!" The God of thunder ran towards you and kneeled before you held him tightly as you sobbed against his shoulder. His eyes widened as he took a better look at you. You had injuries and you looked terrible. "I-I can't walk-" You were hyperventilating. "H-He stabbed my leg."

"I'll get you out of here. Hold onto me." You saw him approach his hand to his ear. "It's Thor, I got [Y/N]. I'm gonna fly out of here, I'm in a basement." Then he wrapped his arm around your waist before breaking down the walls with his hammer to get out.

"Everyone got that?!" Steve warned everybody else. "Protect Thor from Rumlow's men, they're gonna try to shoot him down."

"At which side is he though??" Nat asked. Suddenly they heard a huge din caused by the sound of concrete breaking down.

"He's on the east!" The captain warned everyone.

"On it!" Bucky said.

"Bring him down!" Rumlow ordered to his men when he saw the Asgardian holding you.

"Oh no, you're not." Tony said as came closer and started shooting at Rumlow's men as well.

"Hold on tight!" Thor shouted before sending his hammer flying towards the sky alas your best friend got shot in the back and you both fell on the grass. Thor let out a shriek of pain before he turned his head towards you. "Run away! Go!"

"B-But you!" You cried.

"I'll be fine, join Steve!" He yelled at you. You faced forward and saw Steve and Nat running towards you but they were so far away. You painfully got up and started running the best that you could but with your wounded ankle it was pointless. Suddenly someone jumped on your back and you fell face first against the ground. You were pretty sure you heard your nose break.

"You're not going anywhere." You recognized Rumlow's voice on your back. "If I can't have you they won't either." You let out the loudest scream you've ever produced as you felt a sharp pain in the lower of your back. You were pretty sure he had stabbed you again.

"Crap!" Steve cursed as he started running faster.

You were dying, you were sure of it now. You were losing blood at different parts of your body, you could barely hear what was happening around you and your eyes were slowly closing. You saw him before you lost consciousness though. Bucky kicking Rumlow off you and then you heard a shooting sound. You tried so hard to stay awake, if you were living your last moment you didn't want to go before saying goodbye to the man you only ever loved.

Bucky kneeled next to you and turned your body over. You stared at the starry night sky before his face came into your vision.

"Doll! Stay with me!" You couldn't hear him, you read on his lips. You cried as you looked at him. Finally you were reunited with the love of your life again. You slowly brought your hand up and held his cheek. As always, Bucky took your hand in his and turned his head to place a kiss inside your palm. You smiled at him before closing your eyes.

  
  


\---

  
  


"How is she?" Steve asked the specialized doctor who worked for SHIELD only.

"Well, if you put aside the broken ankle, broken nose, stitches for her forearm and cheek that I could fix and so are out of danger-" He raised one eyebrow. "One of her kidneys has been perfored and she lost a lot of blood, fortunately we had a donor and the surgery was successful. It happened 4 hours ago."

"Oh, thanks God." Tony let out.

"So, when is she going to wake up?" The captain asked.

"That is up to her. She's in an artificial coma, she's the one who will decide if she wakes up or not. For now I will just ask you to be patient." The doctor replied.

"Can we see her?" Tony asked.

"Yes. One at a time though, she needs to rest."

"Thank you." Steve said to the doctor who gave him a head nod before walking away. "You can go first, I'll warn the others."

"Alright." Tony replied before entering your room.

"Just break it down to me straight, Stevie." Bucky said when he saw his best friend walk towards him.

"The surgery was successful." Bucky let out a long breath of relief as he closed his eyes. "We can see her one at a time."

"She's awake??" He asked as his eyes widened.

"No-" Steve lowered his head. "She's in an artificial coma, the doctor doesn't know when she's going to wake up. Apparently it's up to her."

"What even does that mean?"

"I guess it depends in which state her mind is..." Steve sighed. "I have no idea what kind of horror Rumlow put her through besides the physical wounds she has."

"I regret killing him." Steve's eyes widened. "Killing him so quickly. He should've suffered."

"Stop, Bucky. He's gone now and [Y/N] is out of danger. We just have to be patient and hope that she will wake up soon. Tony is with her but you can go after him if you want." Steve put a reassuring hand on his best friend's shoulder.

"I'm not leaving until she walks out with me." Bucky said.

"Just take care of you, Buck. [Y/N] wouldn't want to see you in that depressed mode again." They turned their heads towards Tony who was coming back. "Alright, go see her. We're gonna tell the others." Bucky sighed deeply before walking down the hallway to reach the room you were resting in.

The room was white and quiet except from the beeping sound coming from your machine. You were laid on the bed and your eyes were closed. You wore a hospital blouse and you had a tube fixed to your nostrils. Bucky approached you and pulled a chair next to your bed before sitting on it. He looked at your face with a sad expression, you had stitches on your cheek and several bruises on other parts of your face. What the fuck had they done to you?

His tears blurred his vision when he carefully took your hand in his and then his eyes wandered on the other scar on your forearm. He should've never let you come and he should've been the one to look after you back when you were at your village.

"I-I don't know if you can hear me..." Bucky started. "And-" He let out an emotionless dry chuckle escape his mouth. "I know I said it a lot but I'm so- so sorry, doll..." He bit onto his lower lip to stop it from trembling. "I wish we found you faster, I wish you never got taken away-" The winter soldier cried quietly. "I'm so sorry I didn't listen to you when you said you didn't want to go, I'm sorry I forced you, I'm sorry I didn't message you when I was on my mission, I'm sorry I danced with Sharon, I'm sorry I didn't come to your date-" He broke down in sobs. "Please, you have to wake up doll. You can't leave me by myself here. I've never felt more alive than when I was with you. I need you, I don't want to live without you."

He grabbed your hand with both of his.

"When you wake up I'll do things right with you. I promise you I'm gonna make you the happiest. You're my priority, I don't care about this job, I don't care about SHIELD, I only care about you. I'll never leave you alone again, something always happens when I do." He raised his eyes to look at your face. "But please you have to wake up first. I promise you I'll be there for you." Bucky squeezed your hand. "I'm in love with you, doll."

"...y-" His eyes widened.

"D-Doll?? Did you speak??" He got up from his chair and towered above you.

"Bu..." Your brows furrowed a little.

"Yes, it's me! It's Bucky!" He let out excitedly as he smiled widely of relief. "I-I'm gonna get you help." Bucky put a kiss on your forehead and got out of your room. "She's awake!" He shouted as he ran through the hallway looking for help.

  
  


\---

  
  


"How are you feeling?" Bucky asked you as he held your hand

"I-I feel like I got run over by a car." You said weakly. After the winter soldier got you help he had to wait outside the room while the nurse took care of you. When you woke up you were confused, you had no idea why you were on this bed and why you were hurt all over.

"You're gonna be okay, doll. I swear to you no one will ever hurt you again. Not me, not anybody in the tower, not Rumlow, not-" Your eyes widened. Suddenly you rememberd. You rememberd everything that happened. "Doll, what's wrong??" Bucky leaned over you and caressed the side of your head as you started sobbing loudly. "Speak to me..." He said in distress, he had no idea what to do. You brought your hands to your face as you cried.

"What's wrong?" The nurse barged into the room when she heard your cries from outside.

"I-I don't know she suddenly started crying." Bucky explained.

"Sir, I'm gonna ask you to wait outside." He got up and did as he was told. He thought maybe he was the reason you cried.

"What happened?" Nat asked him. She was outside waiting with Steve. They came when they heard you woke up, the other Avengers were back at the tower. They couldn't all come into your room.

"I-I have no idea, she started sobbing loudly. W-What if it's because of me?" He asked.

"We don't know that." Steve replied.

"I'll see if I can speak with her." Nat said.

"I gave her a tranquilizer. I'm sorry but I'm gonna ask you to not see her for now." The nurse said to Bucky.

"Can I see her?" Nat asked.

"Not for now, she needs to rest. It's almost 6am, I'm gonna ask you all to come back later in the day." She said to them.

"We understand. Thank you." Steve said to her. "Come on, let's go back. We'll visit her after lunch." Steve and Nat accompagnied Bucky outside.

"They'll contact Tony if anything happens, don't worry." Nat reassured the winter soldier. "For now she's just gonna sleep a bit. She needs it."

 


	61. Abused

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: noncon elements.  
> Basically it's just reader telling what happened to her.

"So, how is she?" Bruce asked the team who visited you. The Avengers were taking their lunch. Everyone had slept through the morning after the rescue mission last night.

"Well, you already know she's awake which is good." Steve said to them.

"But she panicked when she woke up so they put her to sleep very early in the morning. We'll go back again this afternoon." Nat continued.

"Bucky thinks it's his fault, is it true?" Sam asked.

"We don't know. He was with her when she started having her crisis but it could be something else." Nat explained.

"How are you by the way?" Steve asked Thor.

"It's nothing compared to [Y/N]'s injuries." The God of thunder brushed off. "It's my fault she got hurt."

"Stop, it wasn't. You got shot, it could've happened to anybody. At least you found her and got her out of her cell." Steve said.

"All of it is Rumlow's fault." Nat added.

"Where's Bucky now?" Sharon asked. She kept silent most of the time.

"Sleeping hopefully. I told him I'd get him before we go see [Y/N] again." The captain replied.

"Tony went to see Pepper. I think this affected him more than we thought." Bruce said.

"We know him, he probably blames himself as well for the suit that couldn't protect her." Nat said.

"I don't know [Y/N] as much as you all but I'm sure she wouldn't want to see her friends like this." Sam said. "You guys need to cheer up, she's awake, alive and Rumlow is dead. Soon enough this will just be a bad memory."

"You're right." Steve sighed. "We need to start looking on the bright side. Yesterday at this exact time we had no idea where she was." The captain got up. "I'm gonna check on Bucky, we're leaving soon.

  
  


\---

  
  


"I'll talk to her first, just in case." Nat said to the boys after the nurse allowed them to see you. It was just her, Steve and Bucky.

"Alright, well we'll be in the waiting room." The captain said to her.

You heard a door open and you turned your head to see who it was. You felt like crying when you saw Nat. You were in a sitting position on the bed and when the redhaired woman approached you you opened your arms towards her.

"Hey, it's okay." She wrapped her arms around you and gently pet your hair as you cried on her shoulder.

"I-I thought I would never see any of you again." You sniffled. She grabbed a chair after she released you and sat on it.

"How are you?" She asked. You shrugged as you cried quietly.

"I-It was horrible-" You let out as you lowered your gaze on your hands in front of you. "I-I rememberd everything, when-" A hiccup escaped your lips as you sobbed. "W-When Bucky said his name..."

"… Rumlow?" She had to ask. You brought your hands to your face and cried harder. Nat got up and sat on the edge of your bed before gently petting your hair. "You're okay. He will never hurt you again, he's dead." Your eyes widened.

"W-What?" You asked.

"You don't remember that? After he... stabbed you. He was shot dead." She explained to you. You had a vague memory, you thought you rememberd hearing a gun shot. "Do you want to tell me what happened? It might liberate you."

"I-I don't know where to start..." You shoulders shaked as you cried. Nat took one of your hands and held it firmly.

"How about from the beginning? What do you remember? We only know that he took you after we found Sharon without you." Ah, you rememberd.

"T-The... woman." You said.

"Sharon?" Nat asked. You shaked your head.

"The mother of the girl I healed the first time I used my powers." Nat's brows furrowed.

"From the story of your past you told us at the truth or dare game? She was there?" You nodded. "H-He... He told me he found me because of her."

"So you were indeed Rumlow's mission? We only had theories, we weren't sure." She explained to you.

"H-He wanted me..." You cried. "H-He watched us... He said he wanted to take revenge on Steve and Bucky for... he had burning marks on his face..."

"Are you sure? I didn't see anything like that when we took his corpse."

"I-I healed him..." Nat sighed. Of course.

"Okay and then?"

"H-He asked me a lot of questions about you, the Avengers, my powers-" You just rememberd. "H-He... He said I was something. He used a word I-I never heard before."

"What did he call you?" She asked.

"A mutant." You revealed. "He said I had a gene that gave me my powers... The X-gene." Her brows furrowed.

"I don't know why he knew so much about this but we'll deal with that later, okay? Do you remember anything else?" You frowned and started crying again. "[Y/N], what did he do?"

"I-If I refused to answer or if I lied he would hit me." You lower lip trembled as you told her what happened. "H-He ran his knife on my arm." You said as you glanced at it and saw the scar.

"And your face?"

"H-He hit me when he found out I-I messaged Bucky." You said.

"What did he make you do during those 3 days?" She asked. You shaked your head as you sobbed.

"N-No..." You said.

"[Y/N], you're safe with me. You can trust me." You kept shaking your head.

"N-No, please. I-I don't want to-" You didn't have to say it out loud, she could read it on your face.

"He touched you." That wasn't a question, it was a confirmation. You sobbed louder. She wrapped her arms around you and held you tightly against her. She wanted to cry as well but she couldn't do it in front of you. Someone had to be strong for you.

"H-He made me heal his men... T-They said things... disgusting." You said. "I-I touched them to heal and-" You cried harder. "T-They started touching me too... I-I tried fighting them back b-but I would get hit or thrown on the ground... T-They laughed..." You suddenly brought your hand to your neck. "T-They... He took my necklace." You whimpered.

"Don't worry about that, we'll retrieve it." Nat said to you. "Is... Is that all they've done?" You shaked your head as you closed your eyes.

"H-His men touched me but... Rumlow, he..." You breathed deeply. "H-He forced me to take a bath... in front of him. H-He saw me naked." You kept crying as you rememberd everything. "I-I feel disgusting."

"It's not your fault." She reassured you as she caressed your hair.

"H-He took off his shirt and h-he came closer... He started scrubbing my arms and t-then he touched my chest... H-He wasn't washing me, he was rubbing..." You raised your eyes to the sky as you rememberd. "O-One of his men wanted something so he left me in the bathroom... His jacket was there and I-I found a phone."

"That's when you messaged Bucky?" She asked. You nodded. "That was very smart [Y/N], we found you thanks to that." Nat wiped your tears away. "What happened when he came back?"

"H-He didn't see the text I sent at first. He saw it at night. B-But after the bath..." You cried. "H-He kissed me."

"Did-" Nat paused. "Did he go further?"

"H-He said he was going to come for me... at night..." You revealed.

"He didn't- force himself on you?" She asked.

"N-No..." You said. "He let me sleep on his bed after the kiss and he locked the door. Then you guys came and he beat my face and stabbed my leg when he found out about the text. I was thrown into a cell in the basement." You sobbed when you were finally done with your story. "I-If you guys hadn't come that night..."

"Shh. It's over. We rescued you and he will never touch you again." She tried to reassure you.

"I-I can never look at Bucky again... I-I feel disgusting-" You continued sobbing.

"Hey, listen to me. Bucky will never be mad at you for something like that, especially when you're a victim here." She said as she carefully held your face between her hands. "He loves you and it's all that matters to him." You cried.

Nat stayed with you and you both continued talking for a little more until you were too tired and you fell back asleep with the meds they gave you. She walked down the hallway and looked for her teammates.

"Hey- Are you crying?" Steve asked her, his brows furrowed when he noticed. She took a deep breath.

"You would too if you had heard what I just learned."

"W-Wha- What did she tell you?" He asked.

"You might want to sit down." She said to both of them. Bucky stayed silent, he had a bad feeling he really wasn't going to like what he was about to learn. "Before you say anything let me finish." She looked at Bucky as they took seats in the waiting room. She sighed deeply before speaking. "They didn't just hit her... They abused her." She revealed.

"I beg your fucking pardon?" Bucky got up instantly.

"I said let me finish." She glared at him.

"Buck, sit down." Steve told his best friend.

"They didn't... rape her... but they did enough to leave her traumatized." She explained. "Basically Rumlow made her heal him and his men and since they're _men_ and she was the only woman they made disgusting comments and groped her." Bucky violently kicked into a trashcan and sent it flying.

"Bucky!" Steve yelled at him. Nat gestured to the people around them that it was fine, they were handling the situation.

"I'm still not finished so calm down and sit if you want me to continue." She said to the winter soldier.

"There's fucking more??" He asked in disbelief and anger.

"When she sent you that text... She was in a bad situation."

"How bad?" Steve asked.

"Rumlow forced her to... take a bath in front of him." Bucky passed a hand on his face and let out a dry chuckle that sent a chill down Steve's spine. "He... groped her as well." She revealed. "Thankfully they got interrupted by one of Rumlow's men and when he let her alone in the bathroom he left in his jacket and he had a phone in there. She quickly sent the text and when he came back he didn't notice anything. He found out about the text in the night and he hit her. Her cheek and leg injury."

"Are you finished?" Bucky asked.

"When she was done bathing he left her in his bedroom and locked the door on her but..."

"What?" Steve asked.

"He kissed her and told her that he would've forced himself on her during the night. The exact night we rescued her."

"Jesus Christ." Steve let out.

"A bullet in his head was too fucking easy. That son of a bitch, I should've ripped him to shreds." Bucky let out. He clenched his fist so tightly his knuckles turned white.

"Stop. It's over now, he's dead and most importantly [Y/N] needs you." Nat said as she looked at him. "And by the way she didn't start sobbing because of you yesterday. She rememberd everything when you said Rumlow's name, that's why she had her crisis."

"How is she now?" The captain asked.

"After our talk I could tell she was exhausted, she sobbed her eyes out the whole time she explained to me what happened. I let her sleep. Clearly she's traumatized, she feels disgusting and she's afraid of facing Bucky." He raised his head.

"Why?" He asked as his eyes widened.

"Well as you can guess she probably feels like you'll get repulsed by her, she feels guilty for being groped and kissed. Typical victim blaming reaction."

"But that's not the case at all, she did nothing wrong!" Bucky said louder than he intended to.

"Which is why I said she needs you. You need to reassure her. Even if she refuses to see you at the moment she still loves you. You know more than us how she works. She was already insecure before all of this happened, it's gonna get worse if you don't help her soon. Don't let her believe for one instant she did something wrong."

"I'll never make her feel guilty for this or anything. The only one to blame her is me, I should've listened to her when she told me she didn't want to go. All that happened is because of me."

"Stop, we talked about this." Steve interrupted him. "Tony feels guilty for the suit, Thor feels guilty for getting shot, Sharon feels guilty for not protecting her. This ends now."

"He's right. The most important thing is that she's on her way to recovery now and-" Nat put her hand on Bucky's shoulder. "You're not gonna be alone facing this. You're in love with her but she's our friend as well. None of us is gonna give up on her. It might take a little time but she will get better."

"Remember her first week? She couldn't look at any of us in the eyes and she barely spoke but all of us and mostly **you** helped her get better. We did it once, we can do it again." Steve reassured his best friend.

"Why is it always her?" Bucky's expression changed from anger to sadness. "She's the kindest person in the world and she keeps getting hurt. Why is it always her?" He held his head between his hands.

  
  


\---

  
  


Nat, steve and Bucky went back at the tower by the end of the afternoon. They had to let you rest and you didn't want to see anybody else except Nat so they respected your decision.

They gathered in the common room to talk about their visit to you and everyone was baffled when they learned what Rumlow and his men did to you.

"I'm gonna kill them." Thor said with determination.

"Most of them are dead already, the remaining ones have been imprisoned by SHIELD." Steve said with tiredness.

"Then I'll deal with those ones." The God of thunder was furious.

"Stop, that's not what we need at the moment." Nat said. "It's not what [Y/N] needs either. What she needs are her friends support and love."

"This is so awful." Bruce passed a hand on his face.

"Can she come back at the tower?" Sam asked.

"I don't think so. She's still recovering from the surgery and she's traumatized. She only let me see her, I don't think she feels ready to be around other people." Nat explained.

"That's understandable." Sharon commentated.

"There's other things we'll have to look into." Nat started.

"What things?" Bruce asked.

"First, Rumlow took her necklace and even if she didn't cry to me about it I'm pretty sure it's upsetting her."

"I'll find it back." Bucky said. He had been silent during the whole conversation.

"Second, the person who sold her to Rumlow." Nat continued.

"What?" Steve's brows furrowed.

"That person that recognized [Y/N]." Nat said to Sharon.

"Yes, I remember. It was before I got hit." The blonde woman said.

"Whoever she is, she's not getting away." Thor said.

"[Y/N] told us about her in the past... When she told us her story. The woman who sold her to Rumlow was the mother of the girl who bullied [Y/N]. The girl she first healed when her powers manifested."

"She was at the village?" Bucky asked. Nat nodded.

"And finally [Y/N]'s powers. Rumlow told her she was a mutant." Steve's eyes widened.

"How couldn't we guess..." The captain let out as he raised his eyes in realization. It all made sense now.

"A mutant..?" Bruce let out. "Like... Wanda?" He asked.

"Exactly." The redhaired woman confirmed.

"Well even if she is, what does that change?" Bucky asked.

"Nothing but [Y/N] will probably have questions. I think it'd be a good idea to make her meet Wanda. Someone like her who can understand." Nat suggested.

"I don't see a problem with that." Steve said.

"Yeah but isn't she in Scotland at the moment?" Bruce asked.

"Uh, planes exist?" Sam reminded him.

"There's no rush though, [Y/N] doesn't even want to see all of us at the moment I don't think she will want to meet a stranger. We can warn Wanda and plan their meeting in the next 7 or 10 days." Nat said.

"I'll check with Fury and organize this." Steve said as he got up.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know "mutant" is a forbidden word the mcu isn't allowed to use because of their contract with Sony but we all know what Wanda is.  
> By the way I've been seeing this debate on Twitter and I'm curious how you guys feel about it. People are complaining about the fact that in every Bucky x reader fic he calls her "doll" and I was wondering if it was bothering you guys too?? To be really honest I find the nickname really cute LOL so I used it in my works too.


	62. Nightmare

It's been a week since you were in your hospital room at the SHIELD facility. Your recovery was doing well, you followed the doctor's prescriptions and you even agreed to speak to a therapist. You still haven't seen any of your friends though, you only let Nat enter your room. She didn't try to convince you to see the others in case it would upset you so she simply spoke to you and usually told her about her day or what the others were up to.

Honestly you missed them but you were afraid. Nat told you she told the others what happened to you but you didn't mind. You preferred if it was her telling them than you. It was already hard enough reviving those painful moments with the SHIELD therapist. You were afraid of your friends reactions once they'd see you, you really hoped they'd act normally and not treat you like a fragile little girl even if at the moment you felt like it.

"Are you listening to me?" Nat smiled slightly. You turned your head towards her as you blushed a bit.

"I-I'm sorry, I was lost in my thoughts." You apologized to her.

"What were you thinking?" She asked.

"I-I miss everyone..." You let out. "I miss Bucky." Tears appeard in the corner of your eyes.

"Well nothing is stopping you from seeing them, is there?" She asked.

"I-I can't, I'm scared." You revealed.

"Of what, dear? They're still your friends and they miss you too. They're always asking me about you. Most of them are jealous only I get to see you." She smiled in amusement. "I know what you're thinking and let me stop you right at this instant. They're never gonna judge you." Your eyes widened as she rightfully guessed what you were thinking. "You know you don't have to see all of them at once. They can come like me, one by one and spend a little time with you. If you could make one of them enter your room at this moment, who would you want to see first?" She asked.

"Bucky." You replied.

"I didn't see that coming." She said sarcastically before getting up.

"A-Are you leaving?" You asked her. It had just been ten minutes since she came to visit you.

"My time is up. I don't have any more subjects of conversation to keep you entertained with." She said. "Thankfully there's someone else who does and who wants to talk with you." She walked towards the door and opened it before gesturing to someone outside to approach. Your heart started beating faster.

"Are you sure?" You heard the familiar voice behind the door ask to the redhaired woman.

"Yes. She wants to see you." Nat replied before moving out of the way to let the person step in. Tears blurred your vision when you finally crossed eyes with the winter soldier.

"Doll-" Bucky said out of breath before fastly walking to your bed. You opened your arms and he did the same, finally you were holding each other. He hugged you tightly as you cried on his shoulder. He released you and pulled a chair to sit on it then he held your hands in his.

"Well, I'm gonna leave you two alone." Nat announced as she smiled while watching you and Bucky. You were just staring at each other's eyes while she closed the door behind her.

"H-How are you? Are you tired? D-Did they treat you well?" Bucky spoke quickly as he looked at you, you noticed he was tearing up as well. "I-I missed you so much."

"I missed you too..." You said before you started to cry.

"Doll, it's fine." Bucky approached you and sat on the edge of your bed before taking you back in his arms. He gently rocked you and placed a kiss top of your head. You wrapped your arms around his body and clinged on him. "Look at me." He said as he carefully placed his palms on each side of your head. "I'm in love with you. I still love you and nothing changed."

"B-Bucky, I-I feel so gross-" You kept crying.

"You're not. Nothing about you is gross." Bucky squeezed your hands in his. "You're my doll, the [Y/N] I first met. You're still that girl." He smiled. "You just became so much stronger and I'm proud of you, I'm proud to be your boyfriend and I'm the happiest you chose me to be by your side." You stopped crying and slowly calmed down. "I'm still your boyfriend, right?"

"Yes." You smiled slightly. Bucky put a kiss against your non injured cheek and hugged you as he smiled.

"You're so beautiful when you smile." He said. "How have you been? In here I mean." You shrugged.

"I-I want to get out but I don't... I-I can't be around people, I'm scared." You said with a sad, tortured expression. "I-I have nightmares..." You revealed. "W-When I close my eyes..." You teared up.

"Do you want me to stay with you?" Bucky asked.

"T-They won't let you." You replied.

"If you tell me you want me to stay I promise you no one will be able to make me leave." He said with determination. You slowly reached for the sleeve of his jacket.

"P-Please stay with me." You asked in a quiet voice. Bucky felt his heart jump inside his chest. He smiled emotionally before taking your hands in his. For a second a flashback played in his head, that day in the kitchen when you grabbed his sleeve and asked him to stay with you for breakfast. His favorite.

"I'll never leave you alone ever again." He swore to you.

  
  


\---

  
  


"I'm here to bring your pills." The nurse said as she stepped inside your room. You accepted them and swallowed them with a bit of water in a cup that rested next to your bed on a high table. "Sir, I'm sorry but you can't be in here anymore." She said as she looked at the winter soldier. You looked at Bucky with a sad expression.

"Well **I'm** sorry but I'm staying." He said and the nurse's eyes widened.

"Excuse me?" She asked in surprise.

"You heard me. I'm not leaving her alone." He said.

"P-Please let him." You pleaded her. "I-I want him to stay."

"That's not a good idea for your recovery, you need rest." She argued.

"Can I talk to you for a second?" Bucky asked the nurse. "Don't worry, I'm coming back doll." He said as he got up from his chair and guided the nurse outside of your room to speak with her.

"You can't stay. You can come back tomorrow if you want to talk to her but keeping her awake is bad for her health." The nurse explained to the winter soldier.

"Ok, first of all I'm not gonna keep her awake." Bucky interrupted her. "I'm the person who wants her to get back on her feet the most. She asked me to stay with her. She's all alone in that room and she doesn't want to see anybody else except me and Natasha." He said to her. "[Y/N] has nightmares and she's afraid. I'm sorry but there's nothing you can do that will make me leave her side. I either stay with her or I bring her back to her home."

"I can call security-"

"You can call whoever you want." Bucky said more firmly. "I'll leave when she does or if she wants me out of her room." She stared into Bucky's eyes before sighing deeply.

"Fine." She said in resignation. "But you will be held responsible if her health degrades. I trust you to let her rest." She concluded and left in the hallway. Bucky stepped back inside your room.

"Y-You have to go?" You asked.

"No, I can stay." He replied with a smile and then he took back his seat next to you.

"T-Thank you." You said quietly.

"You have no reason to thank me, doll. I'm thanking you for letting me see you and stay. I missed you very much." He took your hand and brought it to his lips to gently kiss your knuckles. "How are you feeling? I mean physically, you had surgery and all..."

"I-It doesn't hurt as much as the first days." You replied. "The doctor said I-I can take my bandages off soon." You said as you carefully touched your nose. "I don't feel pain around my ankle but my lower back does a bit." You explained as you faced forward and looked down. "I-I can't walk yet though." You raised your eyes back towards your boyfriend. "B-Bucky?"

"I... I-I'm so sorry for everything doll." He was crying and the vision made your heart ache.

"P-Please don't cry or I will too." You said and bit onto your lower lip to prevent it from trembling.

"I-I'm just so angry... You're the kindest, sweetest person I've ever met... You're literally an angel and yet-" He lowered his head. "You always get hurt, people always find a way to hurt you. It fuels me with rage inside of me."

"I-I'll be okay." You said quietly. "Please stop crying. The only thing hurting me at the moment is seeing you sad." You took a deep breath. "C-Come please, I want to hold you... if that's okay." The winter soldier instantly got up from his chair to sit on the edge of your bed. You gently wrapped your arms around his back and hugged him against you. "I-I thought about you... always when I was there..." Tears appeard in the corner of your eyes. "Y-You were my only happy thought keeping me sane." You heard him break down in sobs as he hugged you back. "Bucky, it's okay." You reassured him as you gently caressed his back with your hand. You felt him shaking against you but you didn't let go, you appreciated his warmth, his smell. You had missed him too.

"Can't believe you're the one comforting me." He said after he calmed down a bit and you smiled slightly.

"I-I love you too and I'll be here for you as well." You promised him.

"Come on, you should sleep." He said after he took a deep breath and quickly wiped his tears with the back of his hand. "Your nurse let me stay only if I made sure you rest."

"Will... A-Are you going to be here when I wake up?" You asked in anxiety.

"I'm not going anywhere, doll." He sat back on his chair. "I'll stay with you until you can leave this place."

"T-Thank you." You said. Bucky approached his chair to your bed, he grabbed your hand with one of his and the other softly caressed your hair.

"You can close your eyes, I'm here." The winter soldier smiled at you and it reassured you. You finally closed them and went to sleep peacefully.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Hhh..!" You had difficulties breathing. It was the middle of the night and you were shaking and sweating on your bed. "...P-Please..." Your brows furrowed in your sleep.

"Doll?" Bucky asked in a sleepy voice. He had fallen asleep on his chair next to you, his head rested on the side of your bed. He straightened himself and rubbed his eyes awake to see properly.

"...N-No..!" You whimpered and cried while you were still asleep, stuck in your nightmare. Suddenly Bucky was on alert, he noticed something was wrong with you.

"[Y/N]. Doll, you're having a nightmare." He said as he carefully shaked your shoulder. "Wake up." He called out to you.

"D-Don't touch me! Stop!" You rolled over on your bed thankfully Bucky catched you before you fell on the floor.

"Wake up!" The winter soldier shaked you with a little more strength.

"AHHH!" You yelled in fear when you opened your eyes and found someone looking at you from above.

"It's me, it's Bucky. You're okay, you had a nightmare." He reassured you in a gentle voice. You started crying and Bucky instantly held you against him. "Shh, it's over." He put a kiss against your head. "I'm gonna get you a cup of water."

"N-No, p-please don't leave me!" You cried in panic.

"Okay, okay. I'm not going anywhere." He sat on the edge of your bed as you firmly clinged on his arm. "Nothing is gonna hurt you."

"H-He was coming for me-" You sobbed.

"Don't think about it anymore, doll." Bucky wrapped his arms around your shaking body. "He's gone forever." You held tightly onto your boyfriend's shirt as you hyperventilated. "Take deep breathes, calm down. You sure you don't want that cup of water? There's a water cooler right outside your room. I'll leave the door open so you can see me, alright?" You nodded slightly before releasing him from your death grip and then he got up. As he said he left the door open while he went to get you your drink. The hallway was empty and quiet, everyone was sleeping. "Here you go." Bucky said after he closed the door and came back on your bed to hold you against him.

"T-Thank you." You said quietly. You were cold and shaking he noticed when your fingers brushed against his to take the cup of water.

"You're freezing. Lay back on the bed, I'm gonna properly put the blanket on you." You weakly seized his wrist.

"P-Please stay with me." You asked him.

"I'm right here, doll. I'm not leaving."

"N-No, I-I mean... N-Next to me, p-please..." He finally understood.

"You want me to hold you?" You nodded. "Alright." The winter soldier removed his shoes while you were finishing your cup of water. When you were done he placed it on the table and then you moved a bit on the side of your bed to make room for him.

"Hhh..." You winced.

"Are you okay?" Bucky worried.

"I-It's nothing." You brushed off.

"No, tell me."

"J-Just my lower back. I-I think it's the stitches."

"Are you sure it's a good idea for me to climb next to you on the bed?"

"P-Please B-Bucky... I-I'm scared." You admitted. He sighed.

"Fine." Thankfully the bed was big enough for you both, you'd still have to squeeze against each other though. Bucky went on the side of your non injured leg just in case.

"I-I'm sorry..." You started crying again.

"Hey, what's wrong?" He asked you in worry.

"F-For making you stay here, I-I'm sorry for being a b-burden..." You sobbed.

"Who said anything about that??"

"Y-You sounded annoyed." You replied.

"Doll, I'm sorry if I made you feel like I don't want to be with you. It's not the case at all, I'm just afraid of accidentally hurting your body." He explained. "You're still recovering from your surgery, I don't want to make your health any worse."

"R-Really?" You asked as you stopped crying.

"Remember what we said? Only the truth." Bucky said as he gently replaced a strand of hair behind your ear and then carefully caressed your cheek. "I'll never lie to you." He smiled at you. "There's no other place I'd rather be right now than here with you in my arms." The winter soldier leaned on you and put a kiss against your forehead. "You can close your eyes, nothing will happen to you." He carefully held you against him. "I'm watching over you."

"T-Thanks..."

"Shh, you don't have to thank me." Bucky caressed your cheek and looked into your eyes. "I love you."

"Me too." You replied as a small tear rolled down your face.

 


	63. Here For You

"Good morning, beautiful." Bucky smiled at you when you finally opened your eyes. He was staring at you while you were sleeping and caressing your hair. You wrapped your arms around his body and held him tightly. "That feels good." He chuckled slightly.

"I-I can't believe you're here, I-I'm really happy." You said quietly. "I-I thought I would never see you again..." Small tears appeard in the corner of your eyes.

"Shh. It's over, doll. I'm with you now." Bucky put a kiss on your forehead. "Did you sleep well?" He asked.

"Hm." You nodded. "I-I didn't have another nightmare."

"I'm glad to hear that." He said before processing to get up.

"W-Where are you going?" You asked him sadly.

"Nowhere, don't worry." He reassured you. "I'm just gonna sit back on that chair. We're gonna get in trouble if your nurse comes to check on you."

"O-Okay..." You lowered your head.

"Aw, don't break my heart like that." He smiled as he took your hand. "Once you're out of here we will be able to hold each other as much as we want." You started crying and it worried him. "Why are you crying?"

"W-What if I can't get out?"

"You're not gonna stay here forever, babydoll." Bucky gently rubbed the back of your hand with his thumb. "Your wounds are healing and soon enough you'll be back on your feet." He smiled at you in reassurance. "Hey, you trust me right? I promise you you're gonna get better." Bucky stood up and hugged you. Suddenly you heard a knock at your door and you both froze at the same time.

"Good morning." The nurse said. "I hope you slept well." She said as she glanced at Bucky and raised one eyebrow before looking at you.

"Y-Yes." You replied.

"Sir, I'm gonna ask you to wait outside while I help mrs. [Y/L/N] clean."

"I'll be right outside your door babydoll, alright?" Bucky brought your hand to his lips and left a kiss in your palm before walking out of your room.

After twenty minutes the nurse left and the winter soldier re entered your room.

"You okay?" Bucky asked.

"Hm." You nodded. "She checked my stitches and said it's healing."

"That's amazing, doll." He smiled. "Then why do you look sad?"

"I-I still can't move my leg." Tears blurred your vision.

"Babydoll, you're gonna be okay." Bucky approached you and caressed your hair. "It's just been one week, you know better than me how long it can take to heal."

"I-I don't wanna stay here for months." You cried.

"I'm pretty sure your surgery is the reason they're keeping you here, not because of your leg. There's tons of people who get their leg broken and they don't stay at hospitals. They get crutches or wheelchairs but they can go home." Bucky explained to you.

"I-I'm gonna be in a wheelchair?" You started crying again.

"No! I'm sorry I didn't pick the right words. We talked with your doctor, your bones aren't broken but your leg needs time healing. My point was that when your lower back gets healed you can go out, even if your leg is still damaged."

"W-What happens then?"

"You'll simply rest at home. I'll take care of you and help you until your ankle is better." He smiled at you.

"I-I don't wanna become your burden..." You said as you turned your head.

"Doll, I'm gonna ask you something and I want you to reply truthfully." You looked back at him. "Do you love me?" Your eyes widened.

"O-Of course!" You replied instantly.

"Okay-" Bucky smiled slightly. "Now imagine if I was sick and couldn't move from my bed, what would you do?"

"I-I..." You lowered your head in realization. "I would help you..." You said quietly.

"Would you see me as a burden?" He asked.

"Never..." You replied.

"Now do you understand where I'm getting at?" You nodded slightly. Bucky caressed your cheek tenderly. "You'll never be my burden. I'm in love with you and it's my role to be there for you."

"I-I'm sorry Bucky... I'm such a mess." A tear rolled down your cheek.

"It brings back memories." He smiled slightly. "I helped you face your fears and insecurites once, I'll do it again and as many times as needs to be because I know what's waiting for me at the top of the mountain." The winter soldier leaned on you and lightly brushed his lips against yours. "My confident and strong [Y/N]." You looked at him teary eyed before leaning as well and kissing him back.

"I love you so much, Bucky." You said to him quietly as you sticked your forehead against his.

"I love you too, doll. You're gonna be okay." He took your hands in his and squeezed them.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Ugh, I've had enough of the food in here." You whined as you pushed your tray away.

"I'm getting worried. You did lose weight." Bucky noticed after he took a good look at you. "Do... Do you want me to sneak out and bring you some food?" He asked and your face light up.

"Y-You'd do that?" You asked. "T-They're not gonna let you though..."

"Who said we have to warn anybody?" He smirked. "If my babydoll's hungry I'm not letting her starve."

"O-Okay..." You smiled slightly.

"I'll be gone for just a few minutes." The winter soldier got up and kissed your forehead before leaving your bedroom.

Forty-five minutes later he came back with a fast food bag under his arm.

"I'm sorry it took longer, since it's noon the place was crowded." Bucky said as he closed the door behind him.

"How did no one stop you?" You asked.

"Hid it under my jacket." He grinned before approaching and giving you the bag. Then he sat back on his chair.

"Bucky, you're the best." You smiled sadly.

"It brings back memories." The winter soldier gently caressed your leg over your blanket. You opened the bag and peeked inside.

"I can't eat all that." You said.

"Oh good because I didn't eat yet as well." Your eyes widened.

"I-I'm so sorry I didn't even think about you. Y-You must be tired and hungry, I-I'd understand if you wanna go back to the tow-" Bucky shushed you as he got up and leaned to softly kiss your lips.

"I told you I'm not going anywhere unless it's with you." Tears appeard in the corner of your eyes as you looked at him. "Come on, eat now before it's completely cold or your nurse finds out and kicks me out of your room." He joked.

"B-Bucky I-" You slowly reached for his hand. "I love you." The winter soldier smiled tenderly at you.

"I love you too, doll."

You were both eating your food quietly until suddenly there was a knock at your door.

"Oh no, d-do you think it's her??" You asked in panic.

"Well, she would've walked in by now so I don't think so." Bucky got up and opened the door. "Oh, it's you. Hey." You saw Nat walk inside.

"Why does it feel like I'm interrupting something?" She asked with a little smirk and you blushed slightly.

"N-No, w-we were eating." You explained. Nat's brows furrowed when she noticed the fast food brand.

"The food here is disgusting okay? And my doll was hungry." Bucky explained to the redhaired woman. "We thought you were her nurse, I don't think she likes me very much."

"I can't believe you two are having a date in here." Nat chuckled.

"It's not a date." Bucky said.

"Counts as one to me." You smiled slightly. The winter soldier came back next to you and put a kiss on your head.

"Did you come by yourself?" He asked Nat.

"No, Steve's here too. He's in the waiting room." She replied.

"Oh, I'm gonna say hi to him." Bucky said.

"I-I..." They both turned their heads to look at you. "Y-You can tell him to come in i-if he wants..." You said.

"Are you kidding? He's gonna be thrilled." Nat grinned. "Go get him." She threw at Bucky before he walked out. "So, how have you been?" She asked you.

"B-Better, I think... I-I'm happy Bucky is here." You replied. At that moment the door opened and the winter soldier entered with the captain following behind him.

"Here you go." Bucky put a tap on Steve's back.

"Steve-" You smiled at him as you opened your arms. The super soldier took big steps towards you before leaning and hugging you against him.

"[Y/N], it's so good to see you." He said next to your ear. You couldn't help tearing up as you wrapped your arms around his back. "How- How are you? How have you been?" He asked you after you released each other.

"G-Good. The doctor said I can take my bandages today-" You said as you carefully touched your nose. "The nurse also checked the stitches on my lower back and apparently i-it's healing... I-I'm sorry." You said as you wiped your tears, they wouldn't stop falling.

"You have nothing to apologize for." Steve reassured you. You raised your eyes to his face and you saw he was teary eyed as well.

"P-Please don't cry or I-I won't stop either." You said. Steve let out a little relieved chuckle before taking you back in his arms.

"Look at you both-" Bucky started with a grin. "The last time you saw each other you were trying to avoid the other." You and Steve's eyes widened as you rememberd.

"B-Buck!" You gasped.

"What happened?" Nat asked.

"I have no idea what he's talking about." Steve replied. You and the captain laughed a bit as you hugged before you let go.

"S-Seems like an eternity ago huh?" You asked with a sad smile as you lowered your gaze. Bucky approached you and put a kiss on top of your head.

"You're gonna be fine, doll." The winter soldier promised you.

"I feel like we're back on our little days out, just the 4 of us." Nat said with a smile. "We need to redo that soon."

"[Y/N] please don't cry, you're gonna be okay." Steve asked you as he gently ruffled your hair.

"I-I really want to... I-I just feel like I-I'll never be ready." You cried quietly.

"Hey, look-" Bucky said as he sat on the edge of your bed and held you in his arms. "Not too long ago you thought you'd never be ready to see any of us and now you let 3 of us in your room. You're getting better." He smiled at you before kissing your cheek.

"I-I guess you're right..." Your lips curved slightly. Suddenly there was a knock at your door and someone entered.

"Hello mrs. [Y/L/N]." Your doctor greeted you and then he acknowledged your teammates with a head nod.

"H-Hi, doctor." You replied before instantly taking Bucky's hand in yours. You just needed the comfort. The winter soldier got up from your bed but he stood next to you as he held your hand.

"I came to check your nose." He warned you.

"Should we go out?" Steve asked.

"No, it's fine. You lot can stay." Your doctor replied. He pulled a chair and sat on it before coming closer to you. "Alright, let's see." He carefully approached his fingers to your face and started peeling off your bandages. When he was done he looked at you along with your teammates who leaned to see.

"S-So?" You asked in worry.

"It's fine." Your doctor replied.

"Please don't lie to her, why does she have so many bruises?" Bucky asked.

"Because I gave her a nosejob." He replied. "Don't worry, I didn't change the shape of your nose." The doctor reassured you when your eyes widened. "Your nose was broken so I had to fix it, the bruises are normal it happens after every surgery." He explained as he glanced at your boyfriend.

"I just hope she can still scrunch it, that's her most adorable feature." Bucky grinned.

"B-Bucky..." You blushed as you rolled your eyes. Your doctor, Steve and Nat let out a small chuckle.

"It's healed, your bruises will disappear by themselves soon." He said as he put your bandages away. "I'm gonna check your stitches as well. Lean over so I can look at your back." You did as he said and he lifted your hospital blouse so he could see your lower back. "Hmm, perfect. It's healing as well. You'll be able to go home soon."

"How soon?" Nat asked.

"3 days if it continues healing at this pace." You couldn't believe it, you were so happy.

"See? Everything is fine, you're okay." Bucky put a kiss on top of your head. You squeezed his hand as you cried quietly of relief.

"And her ankle?" Steve asked.

"You're lucky the blade didn't go through your bone or ligaments, it just damaged your muscle there so once it's healed you'll be able to walk or run again." Your doctor smiled at you. "I'd say it will take another week to heal but you'll be able to go home before that. You don't need to stay here, I just hope your friends here make sure you don't stand on it until it's fully healed."

"Oh, you can count on that." The captain said to him.

"Well, that's it. Continue taking your meds, I'll check on you again soon and hopefully for the last time." He smiled as he got up and walked towards the door.

"T-Thank you." You replied.

"Have a good afternoon." The doctor said to you and your gang before walking out.

"[Y/N], that's amazing!" Nat cheered as she came towards you and taking you in her arms.

"The others are gonna be thrilled to hear the good news." Steve smiled.

"Why are you crying, doll?" Bucky asked as he sat back on the edge of your bed.

"I-I'm just relieved-" You started. "T-Thank you all for staying with me..."

"Honey, that's normal." Nat reassured you. "He's in love with you-" She said as she pointed at Bucky. "And we're your friends. You can count on all of us." You shyly smiled at her. "Well, it's been a while, we have to go back." She announced.

"I'm staying, don't worry." The winter soldier said to you.

"Do... you want to see the others?" Steve asked. "Maybe tomorrow?" You looked at Bucky who smiled at you in reassurance.

"Y-Yes." You replied. You really missed Tony, Bruce and Thor and you couldn't wait to see them again.

"That's awesome." The captain grinned. "We'll give them the good news about your recovery and about this as well." Steve and Nat hugged you before leaving your room.

"I'm proud of you." Bucky said to you.

"I-I'm just really happy things seem to go back to normal." He gently caressed your cheek.

"Once you're out of there it will just be a bad memory that I plan to replace with a lot of happy new ones." You smiled at Bucky as you tangled your fingers with his.

 


	64. My First Gift

"Hey, how are you?" Bruce said as he gently embraced you. "I'm really glad to see you."

"Me too." You smiled as you hugged him.

"I brought you this." He handed you a bag that you opened and then you peeked inside.

"Books? Bruce, thank you so much." You were really happy. "You didn't have to."

"It's nothing. What kind of cool uncle would I be if I didn't bring you gifts?" The doctor smiled. "Steve and Nat told us you were almost out of here. The tower is really quiet without you."

"I-It's quiet in here too without you all." You smiled sadly. "I miss our fun nights."

"Yeah, I miss them too." The doctor sighed quietly. "But don't worry, those days aren't gone."

"So, tell me about you. What have you been up to?" You asked him.

"Eh, the usual you know. Working in the lab with Tony. He came with me by the way."

"Tony is here?" You asked. "H-He can come, I-I want to see him." Bruce sat on the chair next to your bed.

"You know... And I don't want to worry you or anything, he's fine but-" He started.

"What?" You asked.

"He was really worried about you. You know how he is." You nodded. "He blames himself for the suit and not finding you sooner-"

"N-No, I-I don't want him to feel guilty. I-It wasn't his fault it was m-"

"No, [Y/N], stop. None of it was your fault or any of us fault. I didn't tell you this for you to feel guilty as well. I'm warning you because Tony may act different with you and I know you tend to overthink. I'm just reassuring you that you have nothing to worry about and Tony isn't acting weird because of you. You know this better than anybody, you know what overthinking can do to someone." You nodded again.

"O-Okay, I understand."

"Just do me a favor please- And for Tony mostly. Reassure him, we all tried but I think it's gonna do more effect if it comes directly from you."

"You can count on me." You said with determination and Bruce smiled at that.

"Thank you. I'm gonna go get him." Bruce got up and put a kiss on top of your head before leaving. Two minutes later Tony walked into your room.

"Tony-" You smiled as you opened your arms towards him.

"H-Hey, sweetheart." He smiled though he looked sad you noticed. He hugged you carefully against him without squeezing you as if he was afraid to break you. "How are you? No nevermind, I-I'm sorry. I bet everyone keeps asking you that."

"Tony, I'm fine. I'm better." You replied with a reassuring smile. "Why don't you have a seat?" You asked him. "How are you?" You asked him after he pulled the chair and sat on it.

"I-I'm good, nothing happened to me." He brushed off quickly.

"Stop." You said as you slowly reached for his hand.

"Don't move." He worried for you.

"I'm fine-" You repeated with a small smile. "Give me your hand." Tony sighed before giving you his hand. "I can see how stressed you are."

"I'm totally fine."

"Tony. What happened to me wasn't your fault." He looked into your eyes. "I-I... He was well prepared and he knew what he was doing like when he removed my device." You explained. "It's not your fault if the suit couldn't be used and it's not your fault if you couldn't find me-" You raised one eyebrow. "Which is wrong by the way because Nat told me **you** found me thanks to Bucky's phone."

"That wasn't me, that was you." Tony muttered. "I'm so sorry for everything they've done to you."

"I-I..." Tears appeard in the corner of your eyes. "P-Please let's not speak about it. I'm fine now and I-I'm okay." You repeated. You were convincing yourself. "I-I don't want you to feel guilty, you guys saved me from that place." You said. Tony approached you and gently caressed your hair. "T-Tony, please..." You saw he was tearing up. You approached your hand to his face and wiped a tear off his cheek. "I'm okay. It's all over now."

"You're so-" His brows furrowed. "Strong... More than all of us. After everything you went through..." Tony said.

"I know you guys got my back." You smiled. "C'mon, promise me you won't feel guilty anymore." You asked him.

"Well... You won't stop bothering me until I do so fine... I promise." You smiled happily before taking him back into your arms. "You can hug me back you know, I'm not gonna break." You giggled slightly and then he did.

  
  


\---

  
  


Bucky had told you in the morning that he had to leave because he had something to do but he was reassured to leave you with Tony and Bruce who came to visit you around 9am. They told you before leaving that Thor would drop by in the afternoon so you were now staying in your room waiting for him or Bucky to re-appear.

The winter soldier didn't tell you what he had to do and you didn't question it since it was none of your business. You respected his privacy. You distracted yourself with the books Bruce had given you. It was around 2pm when finally someone knocked at your door.

"[Y/N]!" Thor approached you with a bright smile and hugged you tightly against him.

"I-I'm so glad to see you." You told your best friend with tears in the corner of your eyes. You got emotional because you would never forget that night inside of your cell where you were terrified and wounded and finally you saw Thor coming to save you. "T-Thank you for finding me." You said quietly as you cried against his shoulder.

"I-I'm so sorry for letting myself get shot and dropping you-" He started.

"Shh, no. It's not your fault." You said to him. "Y-You have no idea and you will never know the immense joy I felt in my heart when I saw you down there-" You said before breaking down in sobs.

"Please stop crying or I will too." The God of thunder smiled slightly.

"H-How are you by the way?" You asked after you calmed down a bit. "Y-Your back..."

"It's nothing, I'm okay." The Asgardian reassured you.

"Turn around and show me." You ordered him.

"No, you're still recovering. I'll let you heal me if you want once you're out of here."

"Thor, please-" You pleaded as you grabbed his arm.

"No, [Y/N]. I told you I'm okay." He replied. "So, the others told me you can leave soon, right?"

"Hmm." You nodded. "In 2 days if everything goes well." You replied.

"T-That's good, I-I'm glad." Suddenly he looked very sad and you didn't understand why.

"Thor, what's wrong?" You asked quietly.

"I..." His lips curved into a quick smile before it disappearing. "I-I couldn't keep my promise..."

"W-What promise?" You asked confused as your brows furrowed. "Wait, you don't mean..." You instantly realized.

"Y-You know I... I thought about it while we searched for you... I didn't know what to do, I felt so helpless and everyone was anxious too..." Thor told you as he kept his head low, he didn't look into your eyes. "I thought maybe he could've rescue you safely."

"It would've been unnecessary, you guys didn't know where I was... Loki is powerful and strong but he doesn't have all the powers." You smiled slightly.

"Yes, that's why I didn't call for his help and... I was afraid to face him." The God of thunder admitted.

"You? Afraid of Loki?" You asked.

"I was afraid of facing him to say I failed to protect you." A small tear streamed down Thor's cheek, he raised his head to look at you.

"Thor that's wrong, you didn't fail me... You're the one I first saw, you're the one who got me out." You said as you brought your hand to his face and wiped the tear away.

"I'm so sorry for dropping you." He lowered his head again.

"Please, stop. I'm okay now, it's over." You reassured him. "And I'm glad you didn't tell Loki. He must be very busy and-" You bit onto your lower lip. "Y-You know I chose Bucky, hurting your brother is the last thing I want. I-I don't think it's a good idea for him to see me, even if it's been months."

"I-I understand, I'm sorry I brought it up."

"Thor, stop apologizing please." You asked him. "I-I know you meant well, if the situation was inversed I would've thought of all the possibilities as well." You smiled at him.

"You're such a strong woman, [Y/N]." You chuckled slightly.

"I heard that a lot recently and yet I keep putting myself in danger." You smiled sadly.

"But you get up everytime. Each one of us admire that in you." Thor smiled back at you and then he took your hand in his. "I... There's something else I want to tell you."

"W-What?" You were nervous.

"I-I think I chose the wrong words, we had another misunderstandment... At the party I mean."

"Ah... I remember." You said. You were confused about what he had said to you while you danced together.

"I-I'm not just your friend because I promised Loki to look after you. I'm your friend because I really appreciate you. You're very funny, you're kind and you have done a lot for me." The Asgardian explained to you. "Despite dealing with your own problems you have done everything to cheer me up with my troubles and it really moved me. It's like Bucky says, you're really an angel." He smiled at you and you blushed slightly.

"T-Thank you." You replied a bit embarrassed.

"I want it to be clear [Y/N], you're my best friend and you will always have my support." Thor squeezed your hand in his.

"I feel the same." You said with an emotional smile.

"So, are you feeling okay in here? I mean, this room looks very depressing." You giggled slightly.

"Yeah, it is." You replied. "But you know... I sleep most of the time and people come to see me to keep me entertained so it's not that bad." You explained.

"Well, I can't wait until you come back at the tower. It's very boring without you." You bit onto your lower lip as you blushed.

"T-Thank you." Being told that people missed you felt really good, you felt warm in your chest. It was cheering you up.

"I'm gonna get myself a coffee-" Thor said as he got up. "Do you want something?"

"Not gonna lie, I'd kill for something sweet." You said. He smiled at you before walking out of your room. Five minutes later he came back with his coffee and he threw a chocolate bar on your bed in front of you. "Thank you." You smiled at him.

"I hesitated with a package of cookies." He gently played you. You let out a chuckle.

"You're so stupid." You laughed as you opened the wrapping of your chocolate bar. "Thanks for staying with me." You said.

"I have nothing else to do." Thor smiled.

"You know you can just say you appreciate my presence." You smiled back.

  
  


\---

  
  


Thor stayed with you for the whole afternoon to not leave you alone. You had told him that Bucky left you this morning because he had something to do but he'd come back and since the God of thunder noticed you being a bit down about it he decided to stay until the winter soldier would come.

You both always had a lot to talk about so you didn't see time pass, you were very grateful to Thor for keeping you entertained. You felt really comfortable around him, he wasn't your best friend for nothing.

Your nurse had checked on you as well and strangely she didn't seem as reluctant to Thor staying with you than she was with Bucky but you said nothing about it, it just made you laugh a bit.

At long last a knock was heard at your door and the winter soldier finally stepped in. You and Thor said hi to Bucky and he decided to leave.

"T-Thank you so much for staying me all this time, Thor." You smiled at him before opening your arms.

"It was my pleasure." The Asgardian smiled back as he hugged you against him. "It was good to see you again. Take care of you." He released you.

"Hopefully I'll see you very soon." You said. The God of thunder gave a head nod to the winter soldier before waving at you and closing the door behind him. When Thor left Bucky approached you and sat on the chair next to you.

"You seem happy." He said.

"I-I..." Tears appeard in the corner of your eyes. "I-It was good to see everyone again, I had really missed them." You said as you smiled sadly. "Bruce brought me books and Thor gave me a chocolate bar." You said happily as you showed him the books on the table next to your bed. He looked at them but said nothing.

"You're not gonna ask me what I did today?" Bucky asked you. You blushed slightly.

"I-I don't know, I-I don't wanna be intrusive..." You said quietly. "D-Do you want to talk about it though? I-I mean if you want to tell me about your day, I-I'd be glad to listen." You smiled shyly at him. Bucky got up and sat on the edge of your bed.

"Give me your hand." He asked you. You looked at him in confusion but did as he said. Bucky carefully opened your palm before shoving his own hand in the pocket of his pants and taking something from it. He placed an object in the middle of your palm and when you looked at it tears instantly started blurring your vision.

"Y-You got it back?" You cried quietly as you closed your hand on your pendant and held it against your chest. "T-Thank you so much, Bucky." The winter soldier wrapped his arms around your back and hugged you against him while you cried on his chest. "I-Is that where you were today?" You asked him after you calmed down and released him.

"Yes. We took a jet with Steve, Nat, Sam and Sharon to check the place in case there were some documents or anything that the enemy left behind and while we were at it Nat told me they took your necklace so I searched for it." You re-started crying when you rememberd Rumlow's men taking it from you.

"I-It was horrible-" You hiccuped with a sob.

"Shh, doll. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you remember." Bucky gently put a kiss against your forehead as he held you back in his arms.

"I-It was... T-That necklace was my first gift, I-I'm sorry I let them take it..." You sobbed.

"No, no, doll. It wasn't your fault, you couldn't have done anything. Listen to me, look at me-" He said before carefully placing his hands on each side of your face and making you stare into his eyes. "You did nothing wrong and that necklace is right back where it belongs, with you." Bucky smiled at you. "Give it to me, I'm gonna put it back on you." You handed him the object and then moved your hair out of the way so he could fix it around your neck. "Here you go."

"T-Thank you." You said after you calmed down. You took the pendant between your fingers and opened it to look at the picture of Bucky inside. You smiled happily as you looked at his smile.

"Don't smile at a picture of me, I'm right here." The winter soldier joked to ease the mood. "Smile at me. You're so beautiful when you do." You turned your head and smiled at him. Bucky leaned on you and brushed his lips with yours before resting his forehead against yours. "I love you, doll."

"Me too, Bucky. I love you so much." You replied before wrapping your arms around him.

 


	65. Home Sweet Home

You stayed in your hospital room for two more days. Bucky stayed with you the whole time and occasionally Steve and Nat came to check on you two. The others sent their regards and they said they couldn't wait until you'd come back. You also got an email from Peter Parker who had heard about you being hospitalized and so he sent you a friendly message wishing you a good recovery. You appreciated all your friends support but you couldn't wait to get out.

Finally your doctor had checked on you for the last time, your lower back and your nose were completely healed. He had prescribed you meds to take at home and a pair of crutches to pick up at the pharmacy so after you said goodbye to your doctor and your nurse Bucky picked you up to put you in Steve's car and with him and Nat you dropped by the drugstore first before going home.

"I can't believe you're finally out." Steve cheered as he drove. It was 11am and the city was sunny, you had missed being outside.

"M-Me too." You replied with a small smile. "I feel like it's been months since everything that's happened..." You said. You turned your head to look at Bucky, he was gently caressing your hair next to you in the backseat.

"The others are gonna be so happy to see you." Nat grinned.

"Here we are." Steve said as he stopped the car.

"You can wait here with Nat, me and Steve will go get your prescription." Bucky said to you before putting a kiss on your forehead and opening the door.

"Thank you." You said to him. The winter soldier and the captain left the car and they left you with the black widow.

"Bucky seems really happy, it's good to see him like that." She said.

"I'm happy if he's happy." You smiled slightly.

"You both really don't deserve everything that's happened to you. I'm glad you have each other."

"Thank you for saying that." You said. "He... He was sad right?" You asked.

"You have no idea." She replied as she raised one eyebrow. "While you were... you know- at that place... I mean, we were all anxious but Bucky, it was terrible." She turned on her seat to look at you. "Aw, don't cry [Y/N]." She said as she grabbed your hand. "I'm telling you this because everything went back to normal and you're both okay now."

"I-It's fine." You replied as you wiped your tears with your fingers.

"Even if he was depressed and didn't care about anything because he wanted you back so badly we were there for him-"

"Thank you for looking after him-" You said in a high pitched voice before biting onto your lower lip to prevent breaking down in sobs.

"Well... He's our friend too. It's normal." She said. "And at least we were together... It was really nothing comparing to what you were dealing with." Nat squeezed your hand in hers. "I know Bucky must've told you already but [Y/N]- I promise you we'll never let happen this again." She reassured you with determination in her eyes. You leaned and hugged her tightly before letting go when the boys came back.

"What happened in here?" Steve asked when he noticed you and Nat were teary eyed.

"Some girl talk, nothing you have to worry about." She brushed off with a smile before winking at you.

"You okay?" Bucky whispered to you.

"Hmm." You nodded before wrapping your arms around your boyfriend and hugging him tightly. You hated the idea of him being a mess while you were missing. You imagined how he must've felt and it made your heart ache. "I love you, Bucky." You whispered to him.

"I love you too, doll." Bucky smiled at you.

Steve started the car and then you were on your way to the tower.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Why is everyone in the parking lot?" You asked as your eyes widened when Steve drove the car in. All your friends were there along with Sam and Sharon. The captain stopped the car and then he got out with Nat to join everybody until finally Bucky moved next to you and helped you out. The winter soldier gave you your crutches so you could stand on your own and then he joined the others.

"SURPRISE!" They all cheered and your heart started beating fast. You had no idea what was going on.

"Oh my God, s-surprise?? F-For what?" You asked in anxiety.

"Well... I think I'm speaking for everybody when I say that we all missed you very much and we're glad you're back at home." Steve spoke.

"We wanted to give you this-" Nat said as she took a huge bouquet of flowers Bruce and Thor were hiding behind them.

"Y-You guys are gonna make me cry-" You said with already tears in your eyes as you took the bouquet she was handing you.

"Oh no, don't cry for their sad flowers-" Tony mocked. "Save them for me. Turn around." He said to you.

"Wh-" You did as he said and behind Steve's car there was something very much shaped like a car as well but it was hidden under a sheet. "T-This can't be real..." You let out. You struggled a bit with your crutches and your bouquet of flowers while you tried to walk towards Tony's gift.

"Wait, let me help you." Bucky said as he ran back towards you and held your flowers for you. The Avengers walked towards you until you were all in front of the mysterious gift.

"Guys, give me a hand." Tony ordered them and then they grabbed a piece of the sheet. "At 3. 3... 2... 1-" And when they removed it your eyes widened as you gasped loudly.

"T-Tony!" You let go of one of your crutches that fell on the ground while you covered your mouth. In front of you rested a beautiful and luxurious brand new car, you had guessed it was that when it was under the sheet but seeing it with your own eyes felt unreal. "A-Are you crazy? I-I don't even have a license!" You let out and the Avengers laughed at that.

"Don't worry about that, I made some improvements on it. You don't even have to touch the wheel." Tony explained to you.

"I-I can't accept it-" You said as you cried.

"Tut, tut. You don't get a choice." Tony said before taking your hand and putting the keys in your palm. "It's yours now." He smiled at you.

"Hey, look at the bright side doll. We don't have to steal one of his anymore if we wanna go out now." Bucky grinned. You started sobbing as you wrapped your arm around Tony's back.

"T-Thank you..." You said as you cried against his chest.

"It's my pleasure, sweetheart." Tony smiled as he put a kiss on top of your head.

"Come on, let's go upstairs, it's lunchtime and we prepared a feast." Steve announced happily. You greeted the Avengers members you haven't seen yet and then you all squeezed yourself in the elevator.

"It's good to see you, [Y/N]." Sam said to you with a grin.

"T-Thank you, I'm glad to see you all too." You said with a shy smile. Bucky put his arm over your shoulders before leaning to kiss the side of your head.

"Let go of her man, she's not gonna fly away." Sam joked.

"I'm literally never letting go of her." Bucky replied and it made you feel warm in your chest.

"I-I can't believe I'm back in this kitchen." You said as you stepped in and raised your head to look around as if it was the first time you've seen it.

"Doll, sit down. You can't stand on your leg." Bucky pulled a chair for you around the table. You obeyed and went to sit on it.

"Thank you." You said to him with a small smile. He took your hand and put a kiss on top of it.

"I'm gonna get you a glass of water first. The pharmacist said you have to take one of your pills before eating." He went behind the counter.

"[Y/N], I'm gonna put your flowers in a vase, alright?" Nat said to you.

"Hmm, thank you." You nodded at her.

"I remember one time you told us your favorite dish and dessert so I made that." Steve said to you as he put the different food items on the table.

"Oh my god, Steve-" You bit onto your lower lip. "Y-You actually remember that..?" You asked with emotions.

"Of course, why wouldn't I?" He said with a bright smile.

"T-Thank you." You said quietly.

"Nope. No more tears around this table." Tony said to you as he sat across you.

"I-I'm not crying..." You said as you wiped the corner of your eyes.

"Here you go." Bucky put a glass of water in front of you and then he gave you a pill.

"Thanks." You replied and then you swallowed your meds. "What are you doing?"

"Reading the notice, just in case." He said as he unfolded the paper that was inside the box of your pills. You chuckled slightly. "What's so funny?" He smiled.

"Nothing..." You replied as you took sips of your water. Everyone finally sat around the table and before you started eating Sam spoke.

"[Y/N]. I don't know you as much as everyone else here but I know enough to know that you're a very kind woman and I'm glad you're okay. I've seen how stressed, anxious and afraid everyone was-" You grabbed Bucky's hand under the table as tears streamed down your cheeks. "They love you very much and I have no doubt that you love them too. You've also made one of my best friends-" He said as he looked at the winter soldier. "A much brighter and happier man and for that I thank you." Sam said as he grabbed his glass and raised it up. "I'd like to propose a toast to you." He concluded as he smiled at you.

"T-Thank you..." You said quietly as you wiped your tears.

"Well, to [Y/N]?" Steve raised his glass as well.

"To [Y/N]!" Your teammates cheered as they raised their glasses and clinked them.

"Thor, are you crying?" Bruce asked him.

"No..." The God of thunder lied. He was seated next to you.

"Please stop or I-I won't be able to either." You giggled slightly as you cried before leaning your head on the Asgardian's shoulder.

"Well, let's dig in." Nat announced. You sat back straight on your seat and let Steve and Bucky fight each other to decide who will fill your plate.

"If you guys keep arguing she won't even get to eat." Sam said to them.

"I'm her boyfriend, I'm the one who has to do it." Bucky argued.

"Me filling up her plate has become a tradition in this household, I won't let you ruin it, Buck." Steve continued.

"Oh my God, guys..." You let out.

"Buck, let go."

"No. You let go."

"Let him do it, Bucky." You finally said to your boyfriend. "It's true it became a thing kinda..." You smiled slightly. The winter soldier looked at you before letting go of your plate in resignation. "Please don't pout..." You asked him as Steve was filling your plate. "I let him fill my plate but you get to... feed me. Is that okay?" You smiled as you gently took his hand between yours under the table.

"Oh God, no, please. Not again." Tony whined in an exaggerated way.

"Deal." Bucky smirked as he raised one eyebrow.

"Here you go, [Y/N]." The captain smiled at you after putting your plate in front of you.

"Thank you, Steve." You smiled back at him. "It looks very delicious. Thank you for cooking."

"You know how to thank me-" He raised one eyebrow. "Finish your plate and I'll be happy."

"Oh, don't worry, she will." Bucky picked a bit of your food with your fork and approached it to your mouth. You smiled at each other before you opened your mouth and let him feed you.

"Oh God did I miss your cooking, Steve." You said after you chewed and swallowed.

"I'm glad you like it." The captain looked happy and satisfied. The winter soldier kept feeding you until you've had enough.

"Bucky, I can feed myself. You didn't even touch **your** food." You said as you glanced at his plate.

"I'm fine and you need to eat. I don't know what that nurse did to you in that place, you lost a bunch of weight and it's worrying me." He said as he guided your fork back to your mouth.

"I'm fine, Bucky." You said. "Will you eat if **I** feed you?" You smiled.

"I like the sound of that." Bucky smirked.

"All you had to do was ask." You said as you grabbed his fork to feed him. "Open up."

"Hmm, food just tastes better when it's you feeding me." He stared into your eyes. "Doll?"

"I-It's nothing..." You brushed off.

"Why are you crying?" He asked you quietly.

"I-I... I was afraid we would never be able to do this again..." You cried. Bucky wrapped his arm around your back and brought you against him. Your head rested against his chest as you cried.

"Is she okay?" Nat mouthed to your boyfriend, your teammates had all noticed you were crying. The winter soldier had gestured to them that he would handle it.

"Come, I think it's time for your nap." Bucky reassured you.

"B-But what about lunch with ever-"

"Doll, they all understand. You're fine. Come on, take your crutches in your hands I'm gonna carry you."

"I-I can walk, Bucky..." You argued.

"Fine, alright. Let's go." You both stepped out of the kitchen and went to take the elevator.

  
  


"I-I had almost forgotten what it looked like..." You said as you walked in your room. You put your crutches against your desk and then climbed onto your bed. "What's this?" You asked as you picked up a shirt.

"Oh, that's mine." Bucky said.

"When did you leave it here?" You asked in confusion.

"I-I... I used to stay in your room when you were... not here. I missed you so badly so I used to lay in your bed, hug your pillow, smell your- Doll, please don't cry." Bucky said as he joined you on the bed and held you against him.

"I-It's fine, I-I understand..." You replied. "I-I wish I could've done the same..."

"Doll, I think you need to let it all out..." He said as he grabbed your hand. "I think you'd feel better if you tell me what happened." You shaked your head.

"N-No, p-please..." You closed your eyes and cried.

"Hear me out. I already know what happened in the big lines but I'm afraid of you breaking down if we do normal things that we used to do because you'll remember painful moments. I need to know what is troubling you to help you move on." Bucky gently caressed your cheek. "I really think you'll feel better after it."

"I-It was so horrible..." You said as you cried against his chest. "I-I... Not only what they've done to me... H-He also said things about Steve... About you..." Your shoulders shaked as you sobbed.

"What did he say?" Bucky asked you softly as he caressed your hair.

"T-That he wanted revenge... W-When he saw my necklace he understood about you and me." You breathed deeply to calm down. "H-He made me understand that I-I'd be his way to hurt you." You cried. "I-I was terrified, Bucky." You admitted.

"Whatever threats he said to you, they're all meaningless now. He's gone forever and he will never touch you ever again." Bucky said as he stared into your eyes.

"H-He forced me to heal, all day... One of his men... He clearly couldn't stand me-" You said. "I-If I disobeyed or talked back he'd hit me and e-everyone around us was laughing at me." You let out in a high pitched voice before you sobbed again. "A-All day, it was just that. H-Healing, b-being..." And you cried harder.

"Shh, doll." Bucky rocked you against him. "I know what they've done." He said. "None of it was your fault."

"T-They called me names, threatened me, t-touched me and when f-finally they locked me in my room I-I used to cry all night." You breathed deeply. "I-I thought I-I had taken it all for granted... A-All my life I-I've suffered and when I-I finally found something good... I-It was taken again..."

"You only deserve good things in your life, doll." He comforted you.

"I-I felt so stupid about all the t-times we fought, all the time I-I had lost with you... I-I thought I-I would've never see you again-" Tears wouldn't stop from streaming down your face.

"It's over now and I'm right there, doll. You will never be left alone again. I don't care what SHIELD says, I don't care what Fury says, I don't care about what anybody has to say. You're never going on missions without me and I'll be the one who will always have your back." The winter soldier put a kiss against your forehead before wiping your tears with his thumb.

"I-I'm so scared, Bucky." You admitted.

"I know, babydoll." He held you tighter against him. "But I swear to you I will do everything to reassure you and make you feel not scared again. Do you trust me?" He asked.

"O-Of course." You replied instantly. Bucky smiled slightly.

"I love you, you're the love of my life [Y/N]."

 


	66. Strongest Avengers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe I'm almost 200k words into this fic.

You woke up first from your nap with the winter soldier. You didn't sleep for too long so you were still tired but if you slept more you would stay awake all night. You were squeezed against your boyfriend's warm and comfy body, you guided your hand to his face and gently traced your index finger over his features. Bucky looked so adorable when he was asleep it made you smile slightly as you felt your chest warm up.

"I love you so much." You whispered to him before leaning on him and brushing your lips against his. You felt Bucky's arm tighten around your waist and bring you closer to him.

"Hey..." He smiled at you after he opened his eyes.

"Hold me, please." You asked him as you wrapped your arms around his body.

"Don't have to ask me twice." He laid on his back and brought you on top of him. You rested your head against his chest and listened to his heart beat as you drew small patterns on his pec with your index finger. "How are you feeling?" Bucky asked you.

"Don't know..." You shrugged. "I-I'm glad to be here with you but... I-I can't explain, I feel empty..."

"Is there anything I can do for you?" He asked.

"You're sweet." You smiled sadly. "Having you here with me is already a lot." You said.

"Do you want to go downstairs and grab a snack with me?" He suggested with a smile.

"Okay." You said after you raised your head and looked at him. "Wait, I wanna go to the bathroom first."

"I'll go with you." Your eyes widened.

"W-What? No, you're not."

"What if you injure yourself?"

"Bucky, it's the bathroom."

"And?"

"You are not standing in my bathroom while I'm-" You rolled your eyes. "Are you crazy?"

"Crazy for y-" You put your palm against his mouth.

"Don't move from here and don't you dare follow me." You said as you proceeded to get up.

"Okay but leave the door open then."

"Buck!"

"It would reassure me."

"Oh no, don't go there." You warned him. "I'm fine, I'm literally just 7 meters away."

"Leave the door open." He repeated.

"Bucky-" You giggled slightly, he even made you laugh with how ridiculous he was being. "I won't lock it, okay?"

"You don't have to leave it wide open, just a bit so I can hear if you injure yourself."

"I'm absolutely not letting you hear whatever I'm doing in there." Your brows furrowed.

"Whatever, I can hear you anyway with my super hearing-"

"And you just told me to leave the door open??" You walked to the bathroom and closed the door behind you. Five minutes later you came back.

"Are you okay?"

"What, you didn't hear me injure myself?" You raised one eyebrow as you smirked. "Come on, let's go." You said after you grabbed your crutches.

"I love you, doll." Bucky grinned after he put a kiss on top of your head.

You stepped out of the elevator and walked into the empty kitchen. It was around 4pm in the afternoon.

"Can't believe we never got to finish." Bucky let out.

"Finish what?" You asked. The winter soldier patted the counter with his metal hand and your eyes widened as you blushed profusely. "I-I'm going back to bed."

"No, no, you're not going anywhere." He chuckled as he wrapped his arms around your waist.

"You're definitively crazy, you know that?" You avoided his eyes.

"I'm crazy for-" He grabbed your wrist before you could shush him again. "You." He finished with a grin. Bucky carefully put a kiss on your nose before checking a shelf in the kitchen. "What do you feel like? Cereals?" He asked. You wanted to say yes but then you rememberd what Sharon had said to you before everything that's happened.

"No..." You replied.

"That's new... Usually you always want cereals." Bucky noticed.

"Yeah, well... Not anymore." You said.

"Why's that?" He asked before closing the drawer.

"There's... too much sugar in it."

"Since when do you care about that?" Bucky looked into your eyes.

"Since... somebody pointed it out."

"What? Who?" His brows furrowed.

"Bucky, forget it. It doesn't matter." You turned around and went to sit on a chair around the table.

"Yes, it does. Who was it?" He asked you again as he came next to you.

"Sharon..." You muttered. The winter soldier got up but you quickly grabbed his arm. "Please don't do anything, I-I don't care I'm used to it-"

"This is the reason I'm gonna talk to her, because you're used to it. I'm not letting anyone disrespecting you in your own home."

"B-Bucky please, it was days ago, I-I don't care anymore."

"Yes, you do. If you didn't you would've taken that bowl of cereals."

"P-Please don't leave me now, s-stay..." You grabbed one of his hands in yours. Bucky sighed deeply before calming down.

"Fine." He replied.

"I-I'll have those cereals with you, okay?" You smiled slightly. You saw him move behind the counter and grab a box with two bowls and milk before coming back towards you. "I love you, Bucky." You said as you grabbed his hand and kissed the back of it.

"I won't let anyone hurt you." He squeezed your hand in his.

"I know." You smiled at him. "C'mon, forget it. And you can fill my bowl this time." You said happily. Bucky smiled at you in resignation as he grabbed your bowl and filled it with cereals.

"Here you go." He put it in front of you.

"Thank you." You said as you grabbed the milk and poured some into your bowl.

"I don't mean to bring bad memories but... Did they feed you there?" Bucky asked. You sighed deeply as you rememberd, the winter soldier noticed that glimmer of sadness pass through your eyes.

"T-They did." You started. "I-It wasn't Steve's cooking but at least they didn't starve me. I-" You paused.

"What?" He asked.

"I-I thought about starving myself... B-But then he said he would force me if I didn't eat... And since I knew he was going to make me heal I ate their food..." You said.

"I'm sorry, doll." Bucky put his hand on yours.

"I-It's fine... Like you said it's over." You replied.

"I wish I had the power to make you forget it all, to ease your pain, to make you happy..." He said as replaced a strand of hair behind your ear.

"You do." You smiled slightly as you looked into his eyes. "You already do these things, Bucky." You grabbed his hand that stayed on your cheek and put a kiss inside his palm.

"You have no idea what you do to me." He smiled as he stared back into your eyes.

"If it's the same thing **you** do to me I think I have a little idea." You giggled.

"You're so beautiful." He breathed. You blushed instantly.

"Oh stop. Eat before they're all soggy." You said as you lowered your gaze on your cereals.

"You're the only thing I wanna eat." He grinned.

"B-Buck! S-Stop fooling around..." You said before eating, he was laughing next to you. You had missed the sound of it.

  
  


\---

  
  


When you finished eating you had retreated back to your room with your boyfriend. He wouldn't leave your side anymore. It's not that you hated it or anything but you were worried about him. It wouldn't be good for your relationship if he was always behind you. Though for now you appreciated it. You had missed Bucky and the fact that you were back next to him still felt unreal. You just hoped he was doing well.

"Bucky, can you fetch me my clothes please? I put them on the desk, I forgot to take them in." You had decided to take a shower, you felt like you still smelled like that hospital room.

"Of course." He replied as he got up from your bed and then grabbed your pile of clothes that rested on your desk. "Here."

"Thank you." You passed your hand between the bathroom door and took your clothes from him. Five minutes later you came back out, jumping on one foot until you reached your bed. You wore booty shorts and a long sleeved shirt.

"Why didn't you call for my help? I'm here, use me." He said as he stood next to you and gave you his arm so you could stand properly.

"I can't relay on you forever. I have to do things on my own." You replied before sitting on the edge of your bed.

"Yes, you can. That's why I'm here." He shaked his head. "Is your ankle okay, by the way?"

"Yeah, at least I can feel it now not like in the first days. It hurts when I stand on it though." You explained.

"Lay down, I'm gonna massage it with the gel the pharmacist gave me." Bucky grabbed the little bag that contained all your meds on the nightstand.

"You don't have to-"

"I wasn't asking, doll. It was an order." He raised one eyebrow.

"Yes, sir." You joked with a little smile before laying on your bed.

"Don't call me that if you don't want to regret it." You bit onto your lower lip. Bucky grabbed your leg and you flinched, he looked at you in worry.

"I-It's just cold." You said. He touched you with his metal hand.

"Alright. Well, the gel should warm you up so bear it for a little." You nodded. He put your injured ankle on his shoulder as he kneeled between your legs. He took the tube of gel and dropped some of its content in his flesh hand. "Here we go." He warned you before touching your ankle.

"Damn, it's warming up fast." You commentated.

"Yeah, it's funny. My palm is warm as well. Am I hurting you?" You shaked your head.

"I'd let you know if you were. Thank you for doing that... And you know... Being there for me." You said with a little sad smile. Bucky put a kiss on the sole of your foot and you started giggling.

"Ticklish?" He asked with a smirk.

"As if you didn't know." You replied. Bucky let go of your ankle and left a trail of kisses on the inside of your leg while maintening eye contact with you. "B-Bucky..."

"I want to kiss you, doll." He whispered against your skin, he was now kissing the inside of your thigh. "I want to make you feel good again." Your heart started beating faster. You were anxious actually.

"Bucky, I-" Tears started appearing in the corner of your eyes and he stopped when he saw them.

"What's wrong?" His eyes widened.

"I-I'm sorry a-and it's not you! I-I just don't think I-I'm ready to be... t-touched." You said before closing your eyes and crying.

"Babydoll, it's fine." Bucky crawled on top of you to hold you against him. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have."

"N-No, please, don't apologize." You said. "I-It's not your fault, it's me. I-I'm messed up..."

"You're not." He dropped next to you and opened his arms. "Come here." You turned your body to snuggle between his arms. "You're fine and your reaction is totally normal." He reassured you. Bucky gently caressed your hair and kissed your cheek.

"I'm sorry..." You kept crying.

"You have no reason to apologize for. I told you, I don't want to do anything if you're not 100% comfortable." He put a finger under your chin and raised your head slowly so you could look at him. "Please, stop crying. I don't like seeing you sad. I'll never be mad at you or annoyed for something like that." You clinged on his shirt as you looked into his eyes. The winter soldier wiped your tears away with his finger.

"I-I'm sad because he ruined everything-" You started. "E-Everything you have done for me... G-Giving me confidence, making me feel comfortable i-in my own skin, I-I even planned to f-finally take a bath with you..." You let out in a high pitched voice before breaking down in sobs.

"It makes me happy you had reached that level of confidence." Bucky smiled at you but he couldn't help tearing up a bit, it really hurt him to see you broken. "I promise you he won't win this. I'll help you be confident again." He tightened his grip on your waist. "There's no way I'm letting him steal my fantasy of taking a shower with you." Bucky chuckled lowly.

"I-I'm sorry, Bucky..." You apologized again.

"Shh, don't be. I'll do it again and as many times as needs to be. I love you for who you are not for what you can give me." Your eyes widened before you re-started crying.

"Y-You're the best." You said to him as you hid your face against his chest. Bucky smiled before putting a kiss on top of your head.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Hey, did you two catch up?" Nat asked you and Bucky when you entered the kitchen for dinner.

"We haven't seen you all afternoon." Sam added.

"Leave them alone." Steve defended you both.

"Personally I'm tired of Bucky keeping [Y/N] all to himself. I missed her too." Tony said and it warmed your chest.

"Yes, I agree with that." Thor added.

"You guys are on fire, huh?" Bruce chuckled.

"Sucks for you guys." Bucky mocked.

"Don't be mean." You smiled slightly at him before taking the empty seat between Tony and Thor. "Thank you." You wrapped your arm around Tony and hugged him.

"Are you feeling better, sweetheart?" He asked you.

"Hmm." You nodded. "My ankle hurts when I stand on it but I have my crutches and Bucky doesn't let me do anything by myself." You smiled at your boyfriend.

"[Y/N], don't forget your pills before eating." The captain gave them to you with a glass of water.

"Thank you, Steve." You smiled at him as you grabbed your cup.

"Here we go again with the babying." Nat joked.

"I'm not babying [Y/N]." He raised one eyebrow. "Her doctor and her pharmacist are counting on me." And then you rememberd.

"Thor-" You called as you turned towards him. "Do... you want to show me your back now?"

"Would that be very wise?" He asked.

"You told me I could once I was out of there."

"I said you could once you were healed." The God of thunder corrected you.

"And I am!" You announced. "C'mon, please. You've seen me heal a bunch of times, you know small wounds do nothing to me." You pleaded him. "Unless you've been lying to me all this time and your injury is severe..."

"It's not." He stopped you instantly to not worry you.

"Then show me."

"What are you both scheming?" Tony asked you and the Asgardian.

"He won't let me heal his back." You pouted.

"She's still recovering, I'm not letting her drain her energy." He explained to Tony.

"It's not draining me!" You continued. "At least show me." Thor sighed in resignation before turning around.

"Fine. Lift my shirt and take a took." You grabbed the hem of his shirt and lifted it.

"What are you doing?" Bucky asked you with widened eyes.

"I'm checking his woun- Thor, are you kidding me?" You interrupted yourself suddenly.

"What?" He asked.

"I don't know what Asgardians are made of but you have pratically nothing except a scar. This is less than the cut Nat gave you on my first day." You said with furrowed brows.

"I told you I was fine." He argued.

"I can't believe you actually almost convinced me of not healing you." You said and then you placed your palm on his back. "Here. All new, it's done."

"Thank you." He smiled after you rearranged his clothes.

"And I'm not drained." You raised one eyebrow with a smile. "And by the way this goes to you all. If you're injured please tell me about it. I don't want any of you to hold back because of what happened. I'm fine and healing is my job." You said with determination. They all looked at you with surprise which confused you a bit.

"Look at her, she's so fierce." Bucky looked at you with a proud smile on his face.

"You're not the strongest Avengers anymore, she is." Tony said to Bruce as he pointed at you.

"I thought I was the strongest Avengers..." Thor muttered as his brows furrowed. You rolled your eyes before chuckling slightly.

"I really missed you guys." You said.

 


	67. Avengers Horror Story

You and your teammates agreed to a fun little night in the living space. It's been a very long time since you were reunited and you all really needed it to relax.

You were all scattered around the room a bit, there were not enough couches for everybody so some of you sat on the floor. You were seated on Bucky's lap as always, he held you closely against him as you all listened to the endless funny stories Sam had to tell.

"This can't be real." Steve laughed.

"I kid you not! All of it is true." Sam replied.

"That's pretty crazy." You commentated.

"What about you, [Y/N]?" The falcon grinned at you. "Do you got any funny or crazy stories to tell?"

"Oof." You let out. "If Bucky told you everything about me you should know my stories are pretty sad." You said.

"Oh God, yeah. Trust me you don't wanna ask a story from her." Tony's eyed widened. "Everytime she speaks it gets real sad and everyone starts crying."

"Hey!" Steve defended you again.

"He's not wrong." You raised one eyebrow as you smiled before taking a sip of your drink. Bucky gently caressed your waist in comfort, you appreciated it.

"Well, it's getting pretty late and if no one has any more funny stories to tell..." Nat started before raising one eyebrow and smirking. "Do you guys want to share scary stories?"

"Oh, fuck yeah." You let out.

"Language." Steve corrected you.

"Really?" Tony raised his head to look at him.

"Sorry." You said before you and Bucky started chuckling.

"That's not how I raised her." The captain said.

"You didn't raise her." Thor said in confusion.

"It was a joke... Since everyone keeps saying I'm babying her." The super soldier muttered. You and your teammates couldn't help laughing.

"Are you sure it's a good idea?" Bruce started. "I wouldn't want Thor and [Y/N] getting nightmares again." You and the Asgardian started blushing instantly in embarrassment.

"H-Hey!" You both said at the same time.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. set the mood." Nat ordered the AI and suddenly all the lights turned off and the music that was quietly playing in the background stopped.

"AH!" You yelled when Bucky pinched your side. "Buck!" He couldn't help laughing.

"You're so adorable, I'm gonna have a blast." You tried to get off his lap but he kept you in place. "I had to check."

"Check what?" You asked.

"Your nose still scrunches when you're upset." He grinned in amusement. You rolled your eyes so far up they could've stayed stuck.

"Well, if you both are done flirting- I have a story to tell." Nat said. You blushed slightly. "Okay, so. This is the story of a father who lives with his wife and their baby-"

"Oh, no. I hate baby stories..." Steve said.

"The father was watching tv and he fell asleep. When he woke up he grabbed the baby monitor and he smiled when he heard his wife sing to their baby "Go to sleep... Go to sleep..." when suddenly the front door opened and his wife comes in with groceries." Nat concluded.

"Oh my God..." Bruce let out.

"Brrr. That's creepy." You said as you wrapped your arms around your own body.

"I don't get it." Thor admitted.

"Wh- For real?" Sam asked him.

"Does he have two wives?" The Asgardian asked.

"Thor, sweetie no." You said to him.

"That's the scary part. The woman with his baby was not his wife." Bucky explained to him.

"But he heard her-"

"Nevermind. I know a similar one, maybe you'll get it this time." Sam started. "You hear your mom calling you from the kitchen and asking you to go join her. You start making your way there but suddenly you hear your mom upstairs telling you "Don't go there, I heard her too.""

"Holy crap." Your eyes widened in fear.

"That's terrifying." Tony said.

"My mother wouldn't be in the kitchen, we have servants in my home on Asgard." Thor said.

"You must be joking." Nat said.

"I'm not, my family is royalty." Steve facepalmed as you, Bucky and Sam were laughing.

"Okay. I know a story as well. It's very short but listen carefully." Tony started. "Don't be scared of monsters, just look for them. Look to your left, to your right, under your bed, behind your dresser, in your closet but never look up. She hates being seen."

"Oh my God, Bucky hold me." You wrapped your arms around your boyfriend and hid your face in the crook of his neck.

"Oho, that's a good one Tony." Nat grinned.

"That's because it triggers our paranoia." Bruce explained.

"Doll, you're shivering." Bucky chuckled slightly as he gently caressed your waist.

"Okay, now I'm gonna tell you one that happened to me." Bruce started.

"W-What?" You asked.

"One night a friend rushed me out of my house to catch the opening act at a bar's music night. After a few drinks I realized my phone wasn't in my pocket. I checked the table where we were sitting, the bar counter, the bathroom and after no luck I used my friend's phone to call mine. After two rings someone answered, gave out a low raspy giggle that sent a chill down my spine and then they hung up. I tried recalling but no answers. I eventually gave up and headed home." Bruce leaned and whispered. "I found my phone on my nightstand, right where I left it."

"Hhhh!" You squeezed Bucky tighter against you.

"Man, that's scary." Sam commentated.

"Something happened to me too..." The winter soldier started and you turned your head towards him with widened eyes.

"Bucky, I swear to God..." You started.

"The last thing I saw was my alarm clock flashing 12:07 before she pushed her long rotting nails through my chest, her other hand muffling my screams... I sat bolt upright, relieved it was only a dream, but as I saw my alarm clock read 12:06, I heard my closet door creak open..."

"AH! Bucky, stop!" You yelled at him when once again he gripped your waist and gave you a jumpscare. The others around you were crying with laughter.

"I just rememberd something." Tony said after the laughs calmed down. "My wife..." He started and his gaze was lost in the distance.

"Pepper?" Thor asked.

"No..." Tony continued. "The one before her, my ex wife. She woke me up last night to tell me there was an intruder in the tower... but the thing is that..." He raised his head to look at you all. "She was murdered by an intruder 8 years ago." He concluded before grinning.

"UGH, I hate you!" You let out. Nat and Bruce held each other as they laughed again.

Suddenly you heard a loud thud and you all stopped moving.

"What the hell was that?" Bucky asked.

"If you guys are pulling my leg again it's not funny." You said.

"Shh, do you hear that?" Steve asked.

"W-What?" Thor asked.

"That moan... I heard it too." The winter soldier said next to you. Then it was steps that you all heard. Steps coming towards the entrance of the living space.

"AHHH!" You and Thor screamed when you saw a shadow stand in the doorframe.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. turn the lights on." Nat ordered the AI.

"Sharon?" Sam asked when you finally saw her. You put your hand against your chest, your heart was beating so very fast.

"Why are you guys in the dark? I knocked myself against a lamp in the hallway." She said as she put her hand against her forehead.

"I thought you were sleeping." Steve said. You rememberd she wasn't there during dinner either.

"I was but then I got up for a cup of water and I heard a scream coming from here." She explained. You felt so ridiculous.

"We were telling horror stories." Bruce said.

"Well I think this is the end of our night." Tony announced. "It's late, y'all should get some sleep." He said as he got up. You got up as well and walked towards Thor.

"Are you gonna be fine?" You joked.

"I will." He smiled at you. "Goodnight, [Y/N]." You hugged each other before you let go and joined Bucky's side. You bid goodnight to everyone else before you and Bucky took the elevator to your floor.

"What?" You asked Bucky as he kept staring at you in silence.

"You're so adorable." He chuckled. You rolled your eyes. "So. Your place or my place?" He asked you after you stepped out of the elevator.

"Hm, yours?" You suggested.

"Alright. Get comfortable in there while I go grab your pillow and blanket." He said as he opened the door of his room to let you in.

"Thank you." You said before walking with your crutches in your hands towards his bed. The winter soldier came back two minutes later.

"Here you go." He placed your pillow on his bed and then covered you with your blanket.

"I love you." You said to him with a smile. It surprised him but he instantly smiled as well.

"I love you too, babydoll." Bucky laid next to you and got under the covers. You turned to face him and then gently placed your hand on his cheek before leaning on him to catch his lips for a kiss. "Any reason to you acting all lovely with me?" He smirked.

"I... had a good time." You said. "Tonight was fun."

"I liked it too." He said.

"Can I... keep kissing you?" You asked in a soft voice.

"How do you want me to say no to that?" He leaned on you this time and kissed you deeply. "Hhh doll, please, you can't make those sounds while we kiss." He breathed against your lips.

"I-I'm sorry..." You said before kissing him again.

"Come on, you should sleep now." He broke the kiss. "Turn around, I'm gonna big spoon you."

"Okay." You giggled. Bucky wrapped his arm around your stomach and brought you close against him. He left a trail of soft kisses on your neck before finally saying goodnight and then you both closed your eyes.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Hhhhn..." Your brows furrowed. "P-Please..."

"Hm?" Bucky opened one eye when you unconsciously elbowed his stomach. "Doll?" He called you in a low sleepy voice.

"L-Leave..." You spoke in your sleep. "Please, don't..!" You said a bit louder. Bucky sighed before grabbing your shoulder.

"Doll, you're dreaming. Wake up." He started shaking you to wake you up.

"Leave him alone!" You yelled before you jolted up and sat on the bed, you were now fully awake.

"It's nothing, you had a bad dream." Bucky explained to you as he sat as well and took you in his arms.

"I-It was awful..." You said as you hugged him back tightly.

"Did you dream of... that again?" He asked you.

"Y-You're okay?" You let go of him and placed your palms on his face.

"Why wouldn't I be?" He asked with a surprised expression. "Doll, it's over. No one will hurt you." Bucky comforted you.

"O-Oh... Y-You thought I dreamed of..." You realized. "D-Don't make fun of me..." You muttered.

"What did you dream of?" He asked in confusion.

"T-The woman with rotting claws attacking you..." Bucky stared at you in disbelief until his lips curved into a smile.

"From the story I told?" He exploded in laughters.

"Stop laughing! I-It was awful!" You were upset. "I-I had to watch her attack you and I-I couldn't move!"

"Oh my precious doll..." Bucky wrapped his arms around you again. "I love you so much please never leave me."

"I might if you keep laughing-" You pouted. The winter soldier calmed his laughing down and then he left a kiss on your neck and cheek before laying with you back on the bed.

"Go back to sleep, it's still very early." You looked at him with an anxious expression. "What's wrong?" He asked.

"I-I'm afraid." You admitted.

"I'm right there doll, nothing will happen to you or I." He wrapped his arm around your waist. "Hold onto me and you'll be safe." Bucky smiled at you. You did as he said and hid your face against his chest. "You're okay." Bucky gently comforted you as he caressed your hair.

"Thank you." You said as you held onto him and then closed your eyes to sleep again.

  
  


You and Bucky woke up a few hours later and after cleaning yourselves in your respective rooms you headed to the kitchen for breakfast.

"I can't believe you dared to lock your door on me." The winter soldier said to you.

"Bucky, I told you. I can shower on my own, I'm safe in my room." You argued with him.

"You say that and if you had slipped it would've taken longer for me to get in and help you."

"The fact that you knew it was locked meant you tried to come in."

"Well, yeah. We said 10 minutes."

"We said nothing Bucky and I was washing my hair."

"Good morning!" Steve greeted you both.

"Hi." You smiled before hugging him.

"Did you sleep well?" Bruce asked you when you sat around the table.

"Y-Yes..." You lowered your head.

"She had a nightmare." Bucky revealed. Everyone wondered if it was about the kidnapping but he quickly cleared their suspicions. "About our horror stories." The winter soldier chuckled.

"Buck!" You hit him slightly while the others snickered.

"Well, you're not the only one." Tony said before dragging his gaze from you to someone across you.

"Thor??" You asked in confusion. He's usually never here for breakfast.

"Check the bags under his eyes." Nat chuckled.

"You guys are so mean." You said before changing chairs and sitting next to the God of thunder. "You okay?" You asked.

"Yes." He replied. You gently caressed his cheek with the back of your finger.

"Someone would be very thrilled if he could see us both at the moment huh?" You joked and then you both started laughing quietly to not warn the others and especially not Bucky that you were talking about the God of mischief.

"[Y/N], I hope you're hungry I made crepes, your favorites." Steve said to you as he put the plate on the table. Your eyes widened.

"Oh my God, Steve...-"

"Her favorites? Like you, Bucky?" Sam asked. You and the winter soldier crossed eyes as you smiled at each other. "I see..." Sam raised one eyebrow as he smirked. "Like seeks like, huh?"

"Yeah well, we also say opposites attract." Nat added. You took your seat back next to Bucky and then put a little kiss on his neck.

"Don't start-" The winter soldier raised one eyebrow and grinned at you.

"Or what?" You bit onto your lower lip as you stared into his eyes.

"You're playing a dangerous game, doll." Bucky stared back at your eyes but he couldn't help glancing at your lips.

"So-" Steve started. Sharon was helping him with breakfast behind the counter before they both sat around the table. "I got an early call from Wanda this morning. She's taking a plane with Vision and they should be here tonight." Nat crossed eyes with Steve and Bucky but you didn't see it.

"That's nice, it's been a long time since we've seen them." Bruce said. You didn't know them so you didn't react but you had nothing against it. If they were friends of the Avengers and members themselves you didn't doubt you'd get along with them.

"Well, what are we waiting for? Dig in y'all." Tony announced.

 


	68. I Want To Please You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY 200K!!!

"[Y/N], come with us." Nat said to you after you were done with breakfast. You looked at Bucky and he nodded.

"I'm coming too." He said to reassure you. You walked through the hallway with Nat, Bucky and Steve to join the living space where you could talk in peace.

"I thought about what you told me while you were recovering." Nat started when you four sat on the couches.

"A-About what?" You asked.

"What Rumlow-" You closed your eyes as your brows furrowed. You hated hearing his name. "What he called you." She said. "Mutant, right?"

"Yes." You said.

"Well, we talked about this with everyone here-" Steve started. "And, first of all I wanna say that we had no idea that you were one. We honestly felt a bit stupid for not thinking about it but it makes sense finally." Steve explained to you.

"He's trying to tell you that we weren't hiding anything from you, we just really had no idea. And it doesn't change anything, doll." Bucky reassured you as he held your hand.

"Okay." You replied quietly. "S-So, you guys know what they are?"

"We heard a bit but since none of us are mutants we're not experts on the subject." Steve continued.

"Which is why... We asked Wanda to come." Nat said. Your eyes widened.

"S-She's a... mutant?" You asked quietly.

"Yes." Steve replied. "She's a really nice girl and she's a bit younger than you but I think you'll get along."

"We thought it could be a good idea for you both to talk." Nat said.

"If you have questions and such, I think she's the one who can give you the most useful answers." Bucky said to you.

"Uhh, yeah I guess. Okay." You replied.

"You okay?" Your boyfriend asked you.

"Yeah. I-I'm just a bit anxious." You replied. Bucky gently rubbed your back as you thought about the situation.

"Don't worry, we're not forcing you to anything." The winter soldier reassured you. "And you don't have to talk to her the moment she steps in."

"She's gonna stay for a few days so you can friend her in a normal way and then speak to her. You got along with all of us so I really don't think anything will go badly." Steve smiled at you.

"Okay-" You smiled back shyly. "Thanks guys. I know you did this for me."

"Well, Steve and I have things to do so we're gonna leave you two alone." Nat said before grabbing the captain's arm, he looked confused but left anyway. Bucky had discreetly gestured to the redhaired woman to give you some space.

"You sure you're good?" He asked you again.

"Yeah, really. I don't wanna get my hopes up anyway, I don't even know which kind of questions I want to ask her."

"Like we said she's gonna stay for a few days so if anything comes up don't hesitate to ask her. You don't have to rush."

"Thank you, Bucky." You wrapped your arms around his body and hugged him tightly.

"I noticed you were really needy for affection recently, it's not unpleasant." Bucky smiled as he hugged you back.

"Stop talking, you're ruining the moment." You giggled slightly.

"I thought about going training today, do you want to come with me?" He asked you when you released him.

"But what about my leg? I can't-"

"Oh yeah, I didn't mean you doing training with me. I thought maybe you'd just want to stay around? You can sit on the bench and watch me."

"Is this a tactic to make me look at you sweat and wear tight fitting clothes so I can catch a glimpse of your muscles?" You raised one eyebrow.

"Are you not interested?" He smirked. You rolled your eyes as you sighed lowly.

"Fine. I'll come." You replied.

"Great. Training starts now." Bucky said before standing and picking you up bridal style in his arms.

"Oh my God Bucky, take the elevator at least. You're gonna fall and break your neck!" You warned him as he went down the stairs. "And what about your... gym clothes?"

"I have some in a locker in the training room." He replied.

"Please put me down I don't want you to hurt yourself." You pleaded him softly.

"I'm fine, doll." Bucky smiled at you before putting a kiss on your cheek. You looked at him with a smile on your face and you gently caressed his hair at the base of his nape while you had your arms wrapped around his neck. "What?" He asked after he noticed you staring at him.

"Just realizing how lucky I am." You replied.

"Stop or I'm gonna do you on these stairs." He warned you with a smirk. You lowered your gaze as you bit onto your lower lip.

After some few minutes you finally made it to the training room. Bucky carefully dropped you on the bench and then went to change before coming back in the room.

"Bucky, where's your goddamn shirt?" Your eyes widened when the winter soldier walked in wearing only a pair of grey sweatpants.

"It's too hot and I'm gonna sweat anyway." He brushed off.

"T-That's not an excuse, what if somebody walks in? T-They're gonna think I'm just here to look at you and drool." You explained.

"And it's not the case?" He raised an eyebrow as he picked a fitness mat from a shelf and laid it down.

"Okay, I'm going back up." You said.

"You're not going anywhere and you left your crutches upstairs." Bucky walked fastly towards you to stop you.

"And who's fault is that?" You asked.

"Just stay, please? No one is gonna come, they got stuff to do." He said.

"Fine." You let out after you sighed. Bucky smiled before putting a small kiss on your lips and then he went back on his fitness mat.

"You counting for me, doll?" He asked as he took a position to do push-ups.

"Sure." You replied. "1... 2... 3..." And you kept counting until he reached two hundred. You were getting tired just by watching him but thankfully his muscles kept you awake and focused.

"You're not too bored?" Bucky asked you after he finished another series of squats.

"The view is nice." You smiled. You looked at the sweat droplets run on his abs and God you really wished it was your hands running on his skin.

"I see..." Bucky walked towards you to grab the water bottle he had left on the bench next to you. He took a few sips from it and sat next to you.

"Bucky, what are you doing? You're sweaty." You giggled as he came way too close.

"I thought you liked the view. I wanted to give you a nicer angle." He smirked.

"How considerate." You raised one eyebrow as you smiled.

"I let myself go these past few days, do you want to confirm it yourself?" He moved to place himself between your legs in front of you.

"Oh no, please..." You said as he took your hand to put it on his pec. You gulped, your heart started racing in your chest. "Bucky..."

"I miss you, doll." He whispered.

"M-Me too, Bucky..." You said as you lowered your head. "L-Like when you kissed me last night b-but I'm scared..."

"Of what?" He asked.

"Of what's in there-" You said as you pushed your finger against your temple. "My mind. I-I really want you to touch me again, I-I want to hold you while you're-" You started blushing.

"When I'm what?" He breathed against your lips as he approached his face closer to yours. Bucky looked at you with half lidded eyes while his hands rested on your thighs.

"W-When you're... moving inside me..." You confessed as he nuzzled his nose with yours. "B-But after they... I-I'm scared of being touched... Even if it's you and I-I trust you."

"I understand." Bucky said before gently brushing his lips against yours. You kissed him back softly until he broke the kiss and got up. "Let's go, I'm done." He gave you his arm and helped you up.

"You don't have to carry me again." You said. "I can walk until we reach the elevator."

"Shh, I want your ankle to get healed very soon and if we want that to happen I'm not letting you put your foot on the ground."

The winter soldier carried you to his room and then laid you on his bed before heading into his bathroom to take a shower. You turned over and grabbed his pillow that you hugged and smelled while he was under the water. You were so in love with your boyfriend, after what happened to you you swore you would cherish every moment you get to spend with him because during those days you had really thought that you lost him forever.

"What are you doing?" Bucky asked you. You didn't even hear him. Your eyes were closed while you were thinking.

"What? You're the only one allowed to hug my pillows?" You asked with a smile before turning around to look at him. "God, Bucky, that towel is gonna kill me one day." You huffed as you looked at him.

"I don't have a bath robe." He joked.

"Whatever..." You sighed. The winter soldier walked towards his bed and sat on the edge of it. You kneeled and approached him from behind to put a kiss on his nape. But you didn't stop there. "You smell so good..." You breathed against his skin before leaving a trail of kisses from his nape to his shoulder blade.

"What are you doing to me?" You felt him shiver.

"Lay down." You asked him softly. He did as you said and then you crawled on your fours above him.

"Your leg-" He worried.

"I'm fine, I'm supporting my weight on my knees and hands." You replied. "Please kiss me, Bucky." And he did when you placed your head above his.

"What are you doing?" He breathed against your lips. "I thought you didn't want to be touched..?" He asked as he was confused.

"I don't..." You replied. "Doesn't mean I don't wanna touch **you**." You placed your head in the crook of his neck and kissed him there. "If that's okay..." You whispered next to his ear.

"I'm all yours, doll." Bucky grinned as you kissed his body. You ran your tongue on the side of his neck before gently sucking on his skin there. You heard your boyfriend moan softly and it made you smile. You switched spots on his neck to not leave hickeys, you didn't want everybody asking about them so you had to avoid the visible areas of his body. You went further down to leave more kisses on his torso.

"I love you Bucky, you're perfect." You said to him as your hand gently caressed his metal bicep, you kissed the area where the side of his chest had scars. The winter soldier was beautiful to you, all of him. His heart started racing when you kissed him on that part of his body, it meant a lot to him. Bucky moved your hair out of the way with his flesh hand as you left more soft lovebites on him. He liked seeing your soft lips tickling his skin.

"I love you so much too, you have no idea." You raised your head and smiled at him happily. Bucky's heart missed a beat. He was thankful the towel was covering his parts at the moment because he was very hard but he knew it was just a matter of seconds before you'd notice the dent on it. You ran your hands on his abs as you kissed his chest and as you went further down and reached his navel you instantly started blushing when you saw his towel rise slightly. You bit onto your lower lip before speaking.

"I-Is it okay if I remove it?" You said as you gently placed your fingers on the hem of the towel.

"You don't have to, doll-" Bucky started.

"I want to." You replied with determination. "It's your consent I'm asking for." You said. He started thinking and hesitating and it made you worry. "Bucky, if you don't want me to touch you please just say it but if you're hesitating about letting me do this I'm gonna stop you right there." You said.

"It's the latter..." He replied.

"Oh c'mon, I know you want it. And I don't want to leave you... like that..." You said as you glanced at his bulge. "Please, I want to make you feel good. I-I bet it's painful and frustrating..."

"Kinda is..." Bucky smiled slightly. "Fine, go ahead." Your lips instantly curved into a smile, you leaned onto on him to kiss his lips passionately before kneeling between his thighs.

"Oh, wow..." You let out quietly after you unfolded his towel and saw his dick stand proudly in front of you. It was fully hard, red and leaking a bit already. You grasped it carefully in your hand and felt it twitch. You leaned and left kisses on Bucky's thighs before going higher and leaving other kisses on his testicles as you started gently pumping his dick with your hand. You could feel the winter soldier's body twitch as you kissed him but he stayed silent.

"Oh, fuck..." He moaned quietly when you ran your lips on the side of his dick and then licked it as well before kissing his tip. You gave it a few cat-like licks until your mouth closed on it. The more vocal Bucky was being the more confident it made you about what you were doing. You opened your mouth to welcome more of his length inside you. You started sucking him slowly and sensually, you didn't want to rush it, you really wanted your boyfriend to appreciate what you were doing to him and judging by the sounds he was making he was really enjoying it.

"Hmm~" Bucky brought his hand to your head and caressed your hair as you sucked him. You raised your eyes to look at him, he looked so good being lost in pleasure. His face was red, his eyes were closed and his lips were parted. His chest was heaving as he breathed hard. You placed your hands on his thighs and went further down on his length. As you sucked him deeper you noticed the winter soldier was unconsciously thrusting his hips against your face.

"D-Doll..!" Bucky moaned, his eyes were opened now and he was watching you.

"Are you close?" You asked after you took him out of your mouth but pumped him fast with your hand. Bucky groaned in response as he gripped his sheets with his metal hand. "I got you Bucky." You said softly. "Come for me, please." You brought your free hand to his testicles and carefully fondled them as you kept rubbing his dick. Suddenly he came and it landed on your hands, his stomach and... your face. You closed your eyes instantly to not risk getting an infection though you preferred this than your mouth. You rememberd your first time and it tasted awful.

"Doll, I-I'm so sorry..." You heard Bucky shift around you and you swore you heard him hold back a chuckle. You heard the water run and thirty seconds later he came back in front of you. "Don't move." He warned you before gently wiping your face with a wet cloth. "You can open your eyes."

"This is so embarrassing." You let out as you blushed.

"Shh, no, it wasn't." Bucky grinned as he reassured you. "I love you so much." He leaned on you and catched your lips with his.

"Please stop laughing." He was literally chuckling against your lips. After he wiped your hands and his stomach he threw the washcloth somewhere on the floor and hugged you tightly against him.

"You're the most adorable thing on Earth." Bucky said happily before kissing you again.

"Trying to ignore the fact that you're hugging me while you're naked at the moment." You muttered as he smiled in amusement.

"How do you feel after I kiss you down there? Because I swear the way you make me feel is so-" You placed your palm on his mouth.

"I'm gonna die of embarrassment if you keep talking." You stopped him. Your face was as red as a beet.

"Where did you learn to do that?" He bit onto his lower lip.

"Buck!" You brought your hands to your face and hid in shame. "I-I was 25 when we met, I-I wasn't completely ignorant even if I was a virgin." You said.

"I'm asking because it was really good." He smirked as he looked at your face. A blush had crept on your cheeks, you refused to meet his gaze. "You sure you don't want me to reciproca-"

"I'm good, thank you." You said as you placed your hand on his mouth. Bucky kissed your palm before tightening his grip on your waist with his arm.

"It's almost lunchtime, we should get ready to go downstairs." Bucky said to you after he sighed and then got up.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all your recent nice comments. I'm sorry I don't reply to everybody but I read all of them!


	69. The Mutant Talk

You were about to have dinner in the kitchen with everybody when you got warned Wanda and Vision had arrived in the parking lot. Steve went to greet them and then brought them to the dining room so they could join you all.

"Hey, how have you been?" Everyone around you got up and salutated them until your turn came and Bucky introduced you.

"Wanda, this is [Y/N], my girlfriend." He smiled at her as he put his hand on your shoulder in a comforting way.

"Hi." You said shyly but with a smile.

"Stop introducing her like that, she's Avengers member first and second your girlfriend." Nat joked with Bucky.

"Nice to meet you, [Y/N]." Wanda smiled at you and shaked your hand.

"This is Vision." Steve introduced him to you.

"Nice to meet you." You said politely to him. You felt a bit intimidated, they all knew each other except you.

"Well, sit around the table. There's enough chairs and food for everybody." Tony said to them. You took your place back next to Bucky. He gently held your hand under the table, he sensed your anxiety.

"Everything is fine, doll." He whispered to you before he put a kiss against the side of your head.

"So, how's Scotland?" Bruce asked them.

"Cold." Wanda replied with a smile. "But it's nice, it's calm."

"We're having a good time." Vision added.

You all started digging into your plates and soon enough conversations naturally started.

"I can't explain it, I don't understand why everything just tastes better when you're the one feeding me." The winter soldier grinned happily.

"Oh, stop it Bucky." You giggled.

"I never thought I would see Bucky with a girlfriend one day." Wanda whispered to Nat who was sitting next to her.

"Trust me, we were all on our asses." The redhaired woman replied as she raised one eyebrow. "They've been through a lot though."

"Steve quickly explained to me about the kidnapping."

"If only that was the only thing... But yeah, that episode with Rumlow was the most worrisome."

"He also told me she was a mutant, right?"

"Well... Rumlow found out but we don't exactly have any proof. SHIELD doesn't know yet either. We wanted to confirm it with you first before telling Nick about it."

"What does she do?" Wanda asked Nat.

"She can heal wounds with her hands, it's pretty incredible and really useful." She explained to her. "It's without doubt that if a lot of people find out they'll want her powers to themselves. She already had a bitter taste of what people are willing to do to get their hands on her."

"I see. Yeah, I understand. And how is she?"

"You'll find out soon enough. She's a really kind girl and everyone here loves her, we were devastated when she got kidnapped... A lot of bad stuff happened to her in the past and it seems like it keeps happening to her but at least we're here for her now."

"And Bucky?"

"He would literally lose his other arm for her if she asked him to." Wanda's eyes widened. "Yeah, they're really not just fooling around or anything. It's pretty serious, they love each other."

"So, we were saying-" Tony started. "We could gather around in the common room this evening to welcome Wanda and Vision, right?"

"I think it's a great idea." Steve replied. Bucky looked at you.

"If you're in, I'm in." You smiled at your boyfriend.

"We're in." The winter soldier spoke for you both before taking your hand and bringing it to his lips.

"Okay, that's nice. Thanks." Wanda smiled at Tony.

"[Y/N], Thor, don't worry there will be no more horror stories." Sam joked.

"Hey!" You and the God of thunder let out upset but quickly relaxed as everyone started laughing and then you crossed eyes before laughing as well.

"You let your friend speak to me like this?" You said to Bucky with a little smile meaning you weren't really upset.

"What? He's right. You did have a nightmare." Bucky smirked.

"You're so mean. You can't even pretend to defend me." You joked. The winter soldier placed his hands under your chair and brought you closer to him. "What are you doing?" He put his hands on you and then placed you on his lap. "Bucky, there's people around." You blushed.

"It never stopped us before." He smirked. "And also I don't care." He put his head in the crook of your neck and without any warning he bit you.

"B-Buck!" You let out louder than you intended to and it brought everyone's attention towards you both. You put your hand against your neck and took your place back on your seat. You lowered your head in shame as he chuckled. "Stop laughing!" You whispered to him.

"It's fine, we're used to you both shoving your love down our throats." Tony rolled his eyes.

"So, that means I can continue-" Bucky said before approaching his hands towards you.

"No, you can't!" You replied as you tried to avoid his grip. "Bucky, stop!" You couldn't help giggling.

"See what I told you?" Nat whispered to Wanda.

"It's kinda cute." She replied with a small smile.

"Tell me if it's cute again in some days." She chuckled lowly. "Well, we'd rather see them like this than how they were two weeks ago."

"Yeah, it must've been horrible."

"It was."

"Buck, leave her alone." Steve said to his best friend. You stuck out your tongue at your boyfriend.

"Oh, you're so gonna regret that." Bucky smirked.

  
  


\---

  
  


You were sitting on a couch sipping your drink while you watched your boyfriend from afar having a conversation with his best friends Steve and Sam. You were glad Bucky was leaving you a bit to laugh with his friends. You were afraid he became kinda obsessive with the idea of protecting you since what happened. You didn't hate it but you were afraid it'd become unhealty for your relationship.

"Can I sit here?" You raised your head suddenly when the voice brought you out of your thoughts. You saw it was Wanda.

"Oh, yes. Of course." You replied as you moved a bit to the side to give her space on the couch.

"Are you okay? You seemed... lost." She said to you.

"Yeah... I was just overthinking as always." You said.

"About... Bucky?" Your eyes widened. "I didn't even need my powers to see that." She smiled slightly.

"Your powers..." You repeated quietly.

"The others didn't tell you?" She asked.

"I... They told me you were a mutant but they didn't say what you do... I-I didn't ask either. I don't really like to preach." You explained. "Do- Do you wanna go outside?" You gestured the balcony. "It's a bit loud in here with the music and people."

"Sure." You both got up and walked towards the balcony.

"S-So, what do you do? If it's okay for me to ask." You said.

"It's okay-" She smiled slightly. "I guess it's just a bit difficult to explain. I can do a bunch of stuff with my mind. I can move objects, manipulate mentally, fly and some other things."

"Wow." You were amazed. "T-That seems... You're so powerful." You let out in honesty.

"I heard you can heal. That's pretty powerful as well." She said.

"Yeah, the others say it's miraculous but I'm so weak." You said. "If I heal for too long or severe injuries it drains my energy and I faint."

"That's because you can't control your power yet. You know when my powers manifested I couldn't control them either, I used to hurt people around me. It happens to a lot of mutants."

"You're the first one I met."

"There's a lot of us though they prefer to stay hidden. I guess you understand why." You let out a dry chuckle.

"Yeah." You raised one eyebrow.

"I don't want to scare you but if more people hear about what you can do they'll try to come for you to use your powers for themselves."

"Yeah, I'm aware. It happened already."

"Humans are scared of what they can't understand and of what they can't have control over. I'm not just warning you about bad people like Rumlow-" Once again you winced at the mention of his name. "People like the police or the government will try to use you. And not just of this country."

"W-What's your point?" You asked her.

"First, you need to train to be able to control your power fully. They told me you could heal with your hands but are you sure it's just your hands? You need to find out if you can heal for exemple if someone touches your shoulder would you be able to heal them? Can you heal several people at time? Can you heal without draining too much of your energy? I'm not saying you can do all these things but you need to find out what you can and can't do. Have you ever trained before?" You shaked your head.

"I-I... I just place my hands on the injury and let my powers flow."

"That's already great. Since your powers manifested you have been able to use them in a good way. You just need to find out your full capacity of them."

"Yeah, it makes sense." You said.

"And my second point. If you want to be able to live a normal life, and I mean as normal as a mutant _and_ an Avengers member can, you need to stay hidden."

"Don't need to ask me twice. I'm really not the type to show off." You said.

"Yeah, I guessed." Wanda smiled at you.

  
  


While you were discussing with the scarlet witch the others kept laughing in the living space. Bucky turned around and got worried when he couldn't see you.

"She's with Wanda on the balcony, I saw them head there earlier." Steve said to him.

"Is it a good idea to leave them both alone?" He asked.

"What do you think is gonna happen?" Sam asked him. "You worry too much about your girl, man."

"You would too after everything that's happened to her." Bucky lowered his head. "It's awful. I miss her smile, I miss her laugh, I miss her jokes."

"How is she when she's with you?" Steve asked him. "I mean she seems to be doing okay when she's with us but I'm afraid it's just a façade. We shouldn't take lightly what happened to her."

"She told me she felt empty, Stevie." Bucky sighed deeply. "Broke my heart hearing her say that. She has nightmares, she's constantly scared, I wish I could erase it all. All her pain."

"Give it some time, she will get better." Sam said to him.

"At least you two seem to still be very close, like in the kitchen earlier for exemple." The captain added.

"I'm trying to make her laugh, I even tried to... You know, get intimate with my doll again but after what they've done to her... She's afraid of being touched."

"Damn, it's really awful. Those assholes-" Sam started before interrupting himself. There was no need to talk about that anymore.

"She's very strong and time heals all wounds. I'm sure things will get better." Steve said.

"I really hope you're right." Bucky sighed.

"You know don't you think that... Wanda could help?" Sam suggested.

"What do you mean?" The winter soldier's brows furrowed.

"You can't be thinking of..." Steve started.

"You mean... her powers?" Bucky's eyes widened.

"It's too risky." The captain said.

"Well, you should talk about it with Wanda herself but you know... It could help."

"No... No. I don't wanna think about brainwashing my doll..." Bucky crossed his arms on his chest. "That's even more horrible."

"We don't have to go to such lengths, all I'm saying is that Wanda could make her memories not as painful you know? Like when [Y/N] talks or hears _his name_ she starts crying, what if Wanda put like a barrier in her mind? She'd still remember everything that happened to her but it just won't be as painful." The falcon explained.

"Still seems too dangerous to me." Steve said. "What if the barrier breaks or Wanda causes a memory loss in her mind."

"Well, it was just an idea. Just think about it and ask Wanda about it perhaps. Maybe she's not even able to do this and we're debating for nothing." Sam concluded. "I'm gonna get a refill of my drink." He said before leaving the two super soldiers on their own.

"What do you think?" Bucky asked Steve.

"He could be right or wrong. Wanda is still young even if she's skilled. I don't wanna hurt [Y/N] and cause any more pain that she already has."

"Not gonna lie, I'm really not a fan either." He said. "But then again if it can help my doll..."

"Well, like he said. You can talk about it with Wanda. Don't mention it to [Y/N] though, we don't wanna give her false hopes or worse scare her away with this idea."

"Yeah, yeah, obviously." Bucky said. "They've been talking for a long time now, I'm gonna check on them." He said before leaving Steve as well.

  
  


You and Wanda had gotten pretty close, you shared you two's stories and you felt good after it. It was easier to speak to her than anybody you spoke with before.

"Why do I feel like it's always us mutants who have to suffer?" You asked as you leaned on the border of the balcony and stared at the night view in front of you.

"Humans are suffering as well." She replied. "But yeah, being different doesn't help. But remember, different doesn't mean abnormal, useless or any other derogatory names." Wanda smiled slightly at you. "Say..."

"Yes?" You raised your head to look at her.

"Earlier... When I said his name you winced." Your eyes widened in realization.

"Y-Yeah... I-It's been two weeks but I-I can't forget. What he said, what he did, not only him but also his men..." Tears appeard in the corner of your eyes. She came closer to you and put her hand on your back.

"You don't have to tell me, the others explained it to me already." She said as she gently rubbed your back.

"I-I'm glad everyone is here for me and they've all been very lovely, t-they cared for me like nobody has ever did before... I-I really consider everyone here my family..." You explained. "B-But I-I just can't stop thinking about it. W-When a door closes, when I go to sleep, I-I saw Bruce eat a sandwich earlier and I-I felt like puking. Everything reminds me of that place..."

"Do... you want me to help?" She asked you.

"H-How would you do that?" You asked.

"You know how I told you I could manipulate mentally, that's not all I can do."

"What else can you do?"

"I can make you see things, make you believe false visions." Wanda explained.

"T-That sounds a bit dangerous..." You said. "W-What do you want to do to me?" You asked her.

"I could make you forget it." Your eyes widened.

"R-Really? I-I don't know if it's a good idea. I-It seems a bit extreme..." You admitted.

"I understand if you don't want to." She said.

"Forgetting it all is a bit too much but... Could you like- I don't know, try to make it less painful? For exemple I-I hear his name and it hurts me... What if that stops? Like I'd still remember who he is and what he's done but it just wouldn't make me cry everytime. Does that make sense?"

"You don't want to forget but you don't want it to be as painful, is that correct? You want the trauma gone."

"Yes." You said with determination. "Exactly that."

"That's very specific but I could try." Wanda replied. "Though I will need you to remember it so I can visualize it in your head. You can do that?" You nodded. "Close your eyes and remember, especially the most painful moments."

"Okay." You closed your eyes and did as she said. You couldn't help the tears streaming down your cheeks as you rememberd everything they did to you.

"What are you doing?" Bucky's voice made you open your eyes.

 


	70. Stop Underestimating Us

"B-Bucky?" You asked with widened eyes.

"Why are you crying? What did you do?" He asked Wanda in worry.

"Stop, calm down. She did nothing. She was helping me." You explained to him.

"What do you mean helping you? What were you about to do?" He asked.

"I... want her to use her powers on me." You let out.

"Are you out of your mind?" He asked. "Do you know how dangerous that is?"

"Bucky, it's nothing. I trust her, she can help me."

"You don't know that."

"And what do you know about that?!" You asked louder than you intended do.

"I know! I've been brainwashed!" He replied in the same tone and your eyes widened.

"B-Bucky..." You started crying.

"Crap." He clicked his tongue. "Doll, I'm sorry." He wrapped his arms around your back and hugged you against him. He gestured to Wanda to leave you both alone and she did. You sobbed against his chest. "Why do you want to do that?" He asked you.

"Because it hurts!" You replied. "Everything does! I can't stop thinking about it, I see how everyone looks at me since I'm back here, I keep having nightmares and everytime someone says Rumlow's name I break down!" You let out as you cried.

"I understand why you wanted to do it but I hoped you would've told me about it first. Manipulating someone's mind is very dangerous, it could make things so much worse."

"I-I just want it to stop." You said as you cried. Bucky caressed your hair while you tried to calm down. "I-I didn't think about the consequences."

"I know, it's alright." He whispered to you. "It's not that bad of an idea but I want to make sure first that Wanda knows what she's doing." He gently placed his hands on your cheeks after he released you from his arms. "You understand what I'm saying?" You nodded as you sniffled.

"I-I'm sorry, I-I didn't mean to... About you being brainwashed-" Your brows furrowed before you closed your eyes and cried again.

"Don't think about it, I spoke too fast. I'm sorry." Bucky put a kiss on your forehead and took you back in his arms. He chuckled slightly. "It's funny, we literally just talked about this with Sam and Steve."

"W-What?" You asked in confusion.

"Yeah, Sam suggested it but Steve and I thought it was a bad idea because of the reasons I just gave you." Bucky lowered his head to look at you. "We know Wanda is skilled but she's still young you know and we can't afford her making a mistake and screwing with your head. It's too dangerous." He gently wiped your tears. "I can't lose you, doll. Not again, not anymore." The winter soldier leaned on you and brushed his lips against yours.

  
  


"What happened? I heard yelling." Steve asked Wanda when she came from the balcony without you and Bucky.

"Bucky got worried when he saw [Y/N] crying, she was telling me about what happened to her and I suggested using my powers on her and I was about to and then they raised their voices at each other when he mentioned... his brainwashing." Wanda explained to the captain. "You don't need to go, they were in each other's arms when I left, I think he's handling it." She said as she held his arm before he could walk on you both.

"You were about to use your powers on her? Wanda..." Steve looked disappointed

"I know what I'm doing Steve, I'm not the teen who can't control her powers anymore. I use them on Vision all the time." Wanda defended herself.

"[Y/N] is not Vision, she's fragile, especially at the moment because of what happened, we can't afford to lose her." He explained to her.

"Like I said I know what I'm doing. There used to be a time where I used them on you all and I brought out your worst fears. It didn't damage any of you all's brains."

"Wanda, stop. I know you're skilled but I don't want you to use your powers on [Y/N] behind our backs. You've known her for 3 hours. You don't know how she is." Steve argued.

"I know what happened to her. What do you think we were doing outside? That I was convincing her to let me brainwash her for 45 minutes? We had it." The captain's eyes widened.

"What? Already?" He asked.

"I think you're underestimating her. We had the... mutant talk. She also told me about her past and even about her kidnapping. I think it's the first time I shared this much about myself with someone I barely met. I mean this fast, the only person who knows about what I told her is Vision." Steve smiled slightly.

"I had no doubt she'd get along with you. She's the kindest girl I met."

"Yeah, she seems like it." Wanda smiled as well. "We talked about my powers and what I can do. I suggested erasing her memories but she didn't want to. She doesn't want to forget, she just wants the pain to be easen. I can give it to her."

"We'll see about that later, first she needs to know about everything that can go wrong with this idea. Even if you know what you are doing Wanda, all it can take is one mistake and we can't afford that." Steve said. "But it's not even me you'll have to argue with, good luck convincing Buck." He raised one eyebrow.

"Is everything alright?" Vision asked when he joined Steve and Wanda who were standing near a couch.

"Yes." She replied. "I'll explain to you." She took his arm and they headed towards the bar leaving the captain alone.

"What happened?" Tony asked Steve when he joined the other Avengers who were having a game of billiard.

"Wanda almost used her powers on [Y/N] but Bucky stopped them."

"What??" They were baffled.

"Looks like they were faster than us." The captain said to Sam.

"But for what reasons?" Thor asked.

"What do you think? To help [Y/N] forget about the kidnapping." Nat said and Steve nodded to confirm.

"I... I thought she was getting better." Bruce let out.

"Well, not really according to Bucky. Sam and I had a talk with him earlier." Steve said.

"Why stop them if Wanda can help [Y/N]?" Sharon asked.

"It's too dangerous." Steve replied.

"But if it can help [Y/N]..." Thor sighed.

"I don't know what to think about this." Tony added.

"Wanda is skilled, that we can't deny." Nat said.

"But she's still a kid." Tony said.

"Is she though?" Bruce asked. "She's stronger than most of us, her powers are extraordinary and she's living on her own with Vision on the other side of the planet most of the times. Maybe we are underestimating her." Steve chuckled lowly.

"She told me we were underestimating [Y/N] as well. I thought they were getting to know each other in the balcony but they actually had the mutant talk."

"They did?" Nat's eyes widened.

"Maybe we are underestimating these two girls." Tony said.

"Where is [Y/N] now?" Thor asked.

"With Bucky. They almost fought but it's okay now." Steve explained. "What do you guys think about Wanda using her powers on [Y/N]?"

"I don't have enough informations about this to make a decision." Tony said.

"I think that if [Y/N] wants to try it, we should let her." Thor said. "Wanda did fool me with her powers once and no offense to you all mortals but I'm a God." Nat rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, I'm like Tony. I wanna be sure about what Wanda will do to [Y/N] first." Bruce said.

"I'm gonna tell you the same thing I said earlier, Steve. I don't think it's a bad idea." Sam said.

"What does Bucky think?" Nat asked.

"Like me, it's too dangerous." Steve replied. "Wanda told me they almost fought because they brought up his... brainwashing."

"Oh, that's bad." Bruce said.

"Well, he is the person who knows best." Sharon said.

"Welp, Wanda and Vision are coming towards here." Tony warned. "Everyone, look natural."

"As if I couldn't tell you were talking about what happened in the balcony." Wanda smirked.

"I told you to stop reading my mind." Tony pointed a finger at her.

"I can literally read the conversation on Steve's face." She joked.

"He does look pretty worried." Nat added to ease the mood. The captain shaked his head before raising his eyes to the sky and putting his hands on his hips.

"Well, for all it counts we couldn't come up to a conclusion." Bruce said to her. "We don't know if you using your powers on [Y/N] is a good or bad idea."

"Like I said to Steve, I know what I'm doing." She repeated.

"It's too late to argue about it now anyway. Bucky won't let you approach [Y/N] at the moment and we're gonna talk about the pros and cons before you do anything." Nat explained to her.

"Fine." She replied. "But remember I'm not staying around forever."

"Goodnight, everybody." Tony said as he walked towards the entrance of the living space.

"I'm gonna get [Y/N] and Bucky." Nat said. "Steve, you coming?" He nodded and walked with her towards the balcony. The others left the room as well to go to sleep.

"What?" Bucky asked them when they walked in you both. The winter soldier was gently rocking you against him with his arms wrapped around your body.

"Party's over, everyone went to sleep." Nat said.

"Are you two okay?" Steve asked.

"I'm sleepy." You said quietly. Bucky smiled before putting a kiss on top of your head.

"Let's put my babydoll to bed then." He handed you your crutches that rested against the wall and then you walked through the living space to join the hallway. You bid goodnight to Nat and Steve before the elevator doors closed on you then you and Bucky went to your room. "Just lay down, I'll take care of you."

"Thank you." You said in a soft sleepy voice. The winter soldier took off your shoes and socks then he helped you with your pajamas. He stayed very correct, you were half asleep anyway and too tired to argue.

"Here we go." He laid next to you after turning off the lights. "Come here." Bucky held you in his arms and very quickly you fell asleep.

  
  


\---

  
  


You woke up first next to the winter soldier. You had a heavy sleep with no dreams, you were exhausted last night. You approached your boyfriend and left kisses on his skin to wake him up nicely.

"Bucky, it's morning." You said softly when he shifted in his sleep.

"5 more minutes, please..." He said in a sleepy voice and it made you smile.

"Okay." You wrapped your arm around his back and gently rubbed him until he opened his eyes. Bucky brought you closer against him and buried his head in the crook of your neck. "Bucky you're tickling me." You giggled slightly.

"How did you sleep?" He asked you after he left a last kiss on your neck and then came at your face level.

"Good. I was very tired last night." You brought your hand to his cheek and caressed him. Bucky stared into your eyes as he smiled.

"I love you so much." You blushed instantly.

"Me too, Bucky." You took his hand and placed his palm against your chest so he could feel your heart beat. Suddenly he moved to tower you, he placed himself between your legs and held his weight above you with his hands.

"Hold me. Hold me like when we're-"

"I-I get it." You interrupted him. You wrapped your arms under his and clinged on him. Bucky gripped your thigh and placed it against his hip. "Bucky..." You breathed his name when you felt him grind his crotch against yours.

"I want you so badly, doll." He whispered next to your ear.

"You... You have to let her use her powers on me..." You let out.

"I know... But I'm afraid something fucks up and then you'll go through the same thing as me." Bucky wrapped his arm behind your back. "I can't. It terrifies me."

"It's gonna be alright. She knows what she's doing. She explained it to me." You kissed his cheek and held him tighter.

"Are you sure you want to do it?" He asked you.

"Yes." You replied with determination. "I'll still remember what happened, it just won't hurt me as much."

"Okay. Then I'll support you." You smiled.

"I love you so much Bucky." You ran your hands on his back. "Come on, let's go downstairs."

  
  


You got up and cleaned yourselves then you headed downstairs to take your breakfast with everyone else.

"Good morning." You greeted everybody.

"Hey." Bucky said behind you.

"Hey, how are you both?" Nat asked.

"Good." You replied with a smile. You both took your usual seats around the table. "Hi." You greeted Wanda who was next to you.

"Good morning." She smiled at you and Bucky. You nudged him gently in the stomach. He sighed before speaking.

"Wanda, I'm sorry for- losing my cool yesterday." He said.

"And?" You added

"Accusing you of making my doll cry." He added. You grabbed his hand and kissed the back of it.

"It's all good." She replied. "Don't worry about it."

"And if you're still okay with it... I want you to use your powers on me." You said.

"What?" Tony and Steve's eyes widened then they crossed eyes with Bucky who didn't add anything. He shrugged in response.

"You two talked about it?" Bruce asked you and Bucky.

"We did." The winter soldier sighed.

"I trust Wanda, I know she can help me." You said.

"I'm sure she can as well." Vision added.

"[Y/N] is not you, Vision." Nat said.

"My mind is more complex- No offense to you [Y/N]." Vision started.

"None taken." You smiled.

"It's actually more complicated for Wanda to use her powers on me than on an normal human being." He explained.

"She's a mutant though." Tony added.

"Mutants are humans." Wanda said.

"Listen-" You started. "I appreciate you all being concerned about me but the final choice comes to me and my decision is taken. Wanda will use her powers on me." You concluded with determination. "If she wants to, of course." You looked at her.

"I will." She replied and smiled at you.

"Well, I hope you don't regret that choice then." Tony said to you.

"I doubt it's gonna be worse than what I'm going through at the moment." You said.

"You don't know that, that's the thing." Steve added as well.

"You guys know I can hear what you're saying, right?" Wanda added to ease the mood. "You need to stop underestimating the both of us."

"I think they're right." Sam added.

"Thank you." You said to him.

"Bucky, you're awfully silent." Nat said to him.

"We talked about this, doll has my support." He said.

"When do you want to do it?" Bruce asked.

"I don't know. Whenever Wanda is ready I guess." You said.

"We can do it this afternoon." She said.

"Okay." You replied.

"Should we warn Fury?" Bruce asked.

"Oh no, I know that look." You said to Tony and Steve. "If you guys warn him he's not gonna let Wanda use her powers on me. It's gonna be fine, please trust us both."

"Excuse me, since when are you both so close? You've known each other for a few hours." Tony's brows furrowed.

"I thought you wanted us to get along." You replied. "I appreciate you both acting like worried dads but it will be fine!" You re repeated.

"They're babying you too?" Wanda asked you with a smile.

"You have no idea." Nat replied for you.

"I didn't mention that when we talked yesterday?" You giggled slightly.

"What is going on here? Am I being mocked? Is that what is going on?" Tony asked. The mood eased and you all started laughing and smiling.

"God, it's good to have girls in here." Nat smirked.

 


	71. Hooked

"Remember what I told you? Focus on the most painful moments so I can reach them in your mind." Wanda explained to you.

"Yes." You nodded and then closed your eyes. You were laid on a couch in the living space and she was behind you so her hands could reach your head. Some of the other Avengers were in the room as well.

"You might feel weird but it won't be painful. Just bear it for a little, you'll feel like you're dreaming awake." Your brows furrowed, you were too busy thinking about those horrible memories anyway. Wanda's fingers moved above your head, she wasn't touching you but you still felt something. Her eyes turned red as little red stings connected from her hands to your forehead.

"I-I can't watch this." Bucky said before getting up. His heart ached as he saw the tears run down your face. As he walked out of the living space he suddenly bumped into Sharon.

"Sorr-" She started but he grabbed her arm.

"Come here." He dragged her into the hallway until they were far enough from everybody else.

"Bucky let me go, you're hurting me." She said with furrowed brows as she tried to get away from his death grip.

"I'm gonna speak very slowly so you understand me." The winter soldier said before releasing her but he caged the blonde woman against the wall so she couldn't get away. "Don't. Ever. Make. Comments. About. What. My. Girl. Eats." He stared into her eyes to intimidate her. "You understand me? Or you won't be welcome here anymore."

"But I wasn't-"

"I don't care in what way you meant it. I don't care if you said it for her wellbeing and I sure hope it wasn't to mock her-" He raised one eyebrow. "Don't you ever say anything about it." She was about to walk away but he kept her in place. "Am I clear?" Bucky asked.

"Yes." She replied. He moved out of the way and let her go. He knew you didn't want him to speak to Sharon about this but he couldn't let anybody disrespect you, not even her.

After his talk with the female agent he headed to the kitchen. There he found Sam and Steve having a coffee.

"Hey, you're not with [Y/N]?" Steve asked before looking at the clock. It was 5pm. "Isn't she... doing it now?"

"Yeah." Bucky replied as he walked in and then took a seat around the counter. "I couldn't watch."

"Don't worry, I'm sure it will go well." Sam reassured him.

"It better... Otherwise I don't know what I'm gonna do." The winter soldier lowered his head.

"How long did she say it was gonna take?" Steve asked.

"She can do it in seconds but I told her to take her time to really focus and not screw my doll's mind." He replied.

"Why did you come here in the first place?" Sam asked.

"I don't know... Guess it just reminds me of her."

"Look at him, he's really hooked huh?" Sam joked as he glanced at Steve.

"Well, they did met here." The captain replied with a smile.

"You all met her here as well." Bucky replied. "I wanted to cook her something but dinner is being made so whatever..." He added. "She'll probably wake up around that time."

"Damn, it's that serious." Sam grinned.

"Can you believe one day he asked me if he should marry her?" Steve chuckled.

"What?!" The falcon's eyes widened before he looked at the winter soldier. Bucky kept silent but smiled in amusement.

"Come on, stop laughing." He said before getting up. "Help me bake her a cake or something."

  
  


\---

  
  


"It's been one hour..." Tony said as he watched Wanda's fingers still working over your forehead.

"[Y/N] stopped crying though." Nat noticed.

"That's true, she was crying for the first 30 minutes, it worried me." Bruce said. "She must dehydrated."

"I'm gonna grab a water bottle for when she wakes up." Thor said as he got up from a couch and left the living space. He entered the kitchen and his eyes widened when he saw the mess. "What's going on?" He found team cap covered in flour and they looked surprised when they saw the God of thunder.

"Baking?" Sam replied.

"How is it going over there?" Steve asked.

"Wanda is still working on [Y/N]. She cried a lot so we got worried she might be dehydrated when she wakes up so I came to grab a water bottle." The Asgardian explained.

"I've been having way too much fun in here." Bucky said seriously suddenly.

"The cake's in the oven anyway so you can join her." Sam said to him. Thor closed the fridge after he picked up a bottle of water and then he and the winter soldier left the kitchen.

"Why are you so dirty?" Tony asked Bucky when he stepped into the room.

"He was baking with Sam and Steve." Thor explained when Bucky didn't even bother to reply to Tony, he immediately joined your side. He kneeled next to the couch and carefully grabbed one of your hands.

"Sam is... baking?" Sharon asked in confusion. Thor shrugged while Nat and Bruce snickered discreetly.

"Be careful to not disturb her." Vision warned Bucky.

"I know." He replied.

"I'm almost done." Wanda suddenly spoke and it surprised everyone. Sam and Steve walked in as well after they cleaned the kitchen from the mess they've created. Wanda brought her hands to herself after the red little strings disappeard.

"You- You're done?" Bruce asked her.

"I am." She replied.

"And... You succeeded?" Steve asked her.

"Well, I didn't sense anything weird and I didn't lose track of what I was doing so... We'll see when she wakes up but I'm pretty sure it went well." She explained.

"When is she gonna wake up?" Tony asked.

"I think she is." Nat said as she noticed your brows furrow.

"Doll? Are you okay?" Bucky asked you. You finally opened your eyes and looked around you, you found everyone staring at you with anxious expressions.

"Here." Thor handed you a water bottle. Bucky helped you into a sitting position on the couch and then he opened the bottle for you so you could take a few sips.

"Do... you remember what happened?" Bucky asked.

"Wanda... was gonna use her powers on me, right?" You asked.

"Yes." Bucky smiled of relief. "Do you remember the reason?"

"To make my kidnapping less traumatizing in my mind." You replied.

"And did it work?" Sam asked you.

"[Y/N] do you want to try to tell us what happened to you while you were there? You only told me and you cried the whole time. If what Wanda did worked you should be able to tell the story again without crying this time." Nat suggested.

"Okay..." You said.

"Start from when we last saw you." Steve said.

"You left me with Sharon, we walked through the village and then she ordered me to crouch down because someone was running towards me. She shot him to protect me-" Bucky crossed eyes with her but he kept silent while you spoke. "He was one of Rumlow's men, he had grenades on him. We kept walking and then-" Tears started appearing in your eyes.

"Uh, I don't think it worked-" Tony worried when he saw you looked like you were about to cry.

"But she said Rumlow's name and she didn't wince like she always does." Nat noticed.

"Let her continue. What happened next?" Steve said.

"I saw the house... My house where I lived..." You let out.

"I didn't touch those parts of her memories and the trauma behind them." Wanda explained.

"So she didn't cry because of Rumlow." Bruce deduced.

"Keep going, [Y/N]." Steve said.

"In front of my house was that woman... The one who warned everybody about what she saw me do to her daughter. Suddenly I saw Sharon's body fly in front of me and then I felt a sharp pain behind my head... When I woke up I was tied up to a chair in a dark room..."

"No wonder my body hurt like hell." The blonde woman commentated.

"There was a man, he was in the dark as well and I couldn't see him properly. He asked for my name and I didn't reply so he slapped my cheek-" You felt Bucky flinch next to you on the couch. You turned your head slowly towards him and then took his hand in yours. "He told me the rules. When he asks a question, I reply truthfully and everything goes well. If I don't reply or if I lie, he hurts me."

"That son of a bitch." Thor cursed.

"That's when he asked me if I was a mutant. That was the first time I heard that term. He laughed when I told him I had no idea what a mutant was. Then he asked me to tell him about my powers... I kept silent again." You heard someone click their tongue but you didn't acknowledge it. "He hit me again. When I told him about my power he asked a bunch of other questions, how it started, how can I heal, why did I go to the Avengers and then I asked him a question. How did he find about me."

"What did he say?" Bruce asked.

"He said wanted revenge on..." You lowered your head before looking at the captain. "Steve and Bucky. He stepped into the light and he showed me the burning marks he had on the side of his face. Whatever you did to him you got him good." You said to ease the mood.

"Well, it wasn't enough." Bucky finally spoke next to you. Suddenly you gasped. "What's wrong, doll??"

"The... The undercover agent... The one from the cabin, I had forgotten about her..."

"She's dead..." Tony suddenly spoke. "Fury told me about it but you were at the hospital back then so I kind of forgot about it."

"He showed me a picture of her... He told me this is what they do to traitors... She got dismembered." You finally let out.

"I'm gonna puke-" Thor warned.

"I... can't. I don't want to imagine the horror he could've don-" Sam spoke.

"Stop. Enough." Steve said.

"Anyway, he said he made some research about you guys and then they found out that for a normal human being like me it was weird to hang out a lot with the Avengers so they started doing research on me too and he eventually found out the answers he was looking for when the woman at my village told him about me and what I could do."

"That one is not getting away either, by the way." Tony said.

"I... spoke too quickly and told him that you guys would find me and he hit me again..."

"[Y/N]..."

"I know it was a mistake and I regretted it everytime after each hit he gave me." You said. "But it just came out. I spoke too fast. Then he grabbed a chair and sat it front of me. He untied my hands and I saw that my iron wristband was gone..." Tony's brows furrowed. "He told me that he knew Stark technologies and his team safely removed it. He knew there could be a chance for it to activate on its own." You explained. "Then... He ordered me to heal him."

"And you did." Nat said. You raised one eyebrow.

"Once again I was stupid and refused."

"You're not stupid." Bucky said to you.

"He grabbed his knife that he untied me with and ran it on my forearm." You said as you raised your arm and showed them your scar. "He said if I kept making him upset or repeat himself he'd cut one of my fingers next. After that picture he showed me I had no doubt he wasn't joking so I healed him as I cried."

"[Y/N], I'm so sorry." Bruce said.

"While I healed him he started asking more questions because it was taking long to heal the burn marks. He wondered why I didn't heal my arm and he wanted to know everything about my powers since he planned on making me heal his men. I explained to him about the draining, etc..." You explained.

"Did he make you heal right away?" Sam asked.

"No. Before he left the room he let me in I asked for his name. He said it was Brock Rumlow." You said. "Since he seemed a little less hostile because I healed him I asked him to tell me more about mutants but he didn't. He said he'd answer my questions another day if I behaved. He left me for some times, I looked around the room and cried on the rock hard bed I had and then he came back and gave me food."

"And then?" Thor asked.

"He locked me in and left me for the night." You said. "I didn't touch the food at first. I was too anxious and scared, I had a knot in my stomach." You explained. "When he checked on me the next morning he said I better eat or he would force me. Since I knew he was probably going to make me heal I ate. One hour later one of Rumlow's men, that one couldn't stand my sight, he grabbed me forcefully and dragged me to a sort of basement. He threw me on the floor and when I got up Rumlow was there, along with a bunch of other men."

"What happened then?" Bruce Asked. You chuckled slightly.

"Rumlow told me I had the whole day to heal all of them. I thought he was joking me but he wasn't. Though I think he kept notes of what I told him the day before because the wounds I had to heal weren't too severe, it was bullet wounds, bruises or infections mostly. No broken bones." You explained. "The first man was quiet, he was wounded on the forearm, I healed him and he and Rumlow looked satisfied. The second man though..." You lowered your head.

"What happened?" Steve asked.

"He pointed to his crotch and told me he was aching there." You let out.

"Ugh, disgusting pigs." Nat commentated.

"I slapped him when he told me to heal with my mouth and Rumlow's man who was behind me and who couldn't stand me yanked me by my hair and threw me on the ground. He dragged me on the ground until Rumlow's had enough and asked his gorilla to make me stand. Thankfully the next one was silent as well while I healed his leg. And once again it got worse."

"You don't have to tell us-" Bruce said.

"It's fine." You replied. "He had a wound on his chest. He told me that if I could touch his he could touch mine-"

"Bucky?" Wanda asked and suddenly you turned your head towards your boyfriend. The sight made your heart ache.

"Please, don't cry. It's over." You said as you brought your hands to his face and wiped his tears.

"Um, let's take a break." Nat said.

"Come with me." You took Bucky's hands in yours and then got up to take him away from everybody. He picked you up when he noticed you jumping on one foot. "Let's go outside." He walked towards the balcony and then placed on you on the border. Bucky wrapped his arms around your waist and hugged you tightly as he placed the side of his head against your chest. You gently ran your hands through his soft brown hair. "It's alright." You said.

"I... realized how badly everything could've gone. I had imagined horrible scenarios while you were there but hearing you talk about what they did... It's terrifying me." He spoke.

"It's all over now. Like you said to me, he's gone and he will never hurt me again." You smiled.

"You're so strong." He raised his head to look at you.

"Am I though? I had to ask Wanda's help to feel better." You said.

"I know that with or without her powers you would've overcame this anyway. It may have taken a little longer but you would've done it." You placed your hands on Bucky's cheeks and then leaned to kiss him deeply.

"Let's go back, they're waiting for us." You smiled at him.

 


	72. Cake

"You don't have to stay and listen if it hurts you." You said to Bucky while he carried you back into the living space.

"And leave you alone? No way." He replied after carefully placing you back on the couch. You kissed the back of his hand when he sat next to you.

"You two okay?" Sam asked. You nodded with a small smile before continuing from where you left off.

"Well... I knew that if I dared to slap one of them again I would get hit so I gritted my teeth and tried to heal as fast as I can while he was touching me. When I was finally done I moved to the next one and... he got bolder." You said.

"W-What do you mean?" Thor asked.

"He wanted to undress me... He almost succeeded until this-" You held your pendant between your fingers. "Saved me. He took it from me and then threw it to Rumlow. He quickly understood how it worked and when he saw the picture inside he chuckled. Rumlow had found a way to get his perfect revenge on Bucky." You said. "He continued to make me heal all of his men until I was too tired and it started taking longer so he allowed me a nap after lunch and then I re healed until nighttime."

"I'm so glad this is over now." Bruce said.

"That night Rumlow came into my room to explain to me what mutants are. He told me I did a good job so this was his way to reward me I guess." You said. "You guys probably know about the X-gene already, right?"

"Yeah." Tony replied.

"He told me it was weird that the Avengers or SHIELD didn't tell me about mutants since they had one on their side. I had no idea who he was talking about at the time but I guess it's you-" You glanced at Wanda.

"Probably. Rumlow knows me." She replied.

"Anyway, the next 2 days Rumlow didn't stay a lot in the room while I healed. I guess he was curious the first day and that's why he stayed with me but once he got bored he left me alone with his gorilla of a man, the one who hated me, and his men got bolder when he wasn't around. They touched me everywhere while I healed them. Through my clothes but **everywhere**." You repeated. "It was hell, I tried starving myself but I got terrified when he checked on me. He threatened me and then I also started thinking about you all and I didn't want to go, not like that. And mostly I didn't want to leave Bucky. This place was driving me crazy but he was my only happy thought keeping me sane." You said. You heard Bucky sniffle next to you and you squeezed his hand tighter. "I'm fine." You said to him but also to the Avengers. Some of them were teary eyed as well.

"You were very brave." Vision said to you.

"Thank you." You smiled slightly at him. "The last day-" You took a deep breath. "I had to heal again but I was used to it by now. I was exhausted though, I could feel it. Rumlow came to get me and he took me to the kitchen this time. He made a new rule. When he would praise me I had to say thank you. When he told me I've been doing a good job for the past few days I opened my mouth again and told him that I didn't for it for him, I was being forced."

"I told you that's one hell of a woman you got yourself, Bucky." Sam joked to ease the mood. Bucky smiled sadly as he listened.

"He didn't hit me this time but he threatened me, he pushed a knife against my neck because I talked to him in a not so friendly tone. So he repeated himself. He praised me again and I said thank you." You said.

"He's so fucked up." Sharon commentated.

"After this little talk he pushed a plate in front of me and forced me to eat in front of him. At this point I complied, what else could've I done? And then he said the scariest thing he could've said to me at that moment." You raised one eyebrow.

"What... did he say?" Bruce asked.

"He told me that after eating I was going to take a shower." You lowered your head. "And just by the way I hadn't taken any during those 3 days, I had no towels, no products, no spare clothes and I was terrified of them barging at any moment into the locked room I was in." You explained. "Anyway, he grabbed my arm and brought me to _his room_ where he had a bigger bathroom and a bathtub. Right when I thought it couldn't get any worse Rumlow asked me to strip... In front of him."

"I-I'm so sorry..." You heard Thor say. He was the one that was crying the most with Bucky, Tony came in third.

"Anyway after some threatening from him and me sobbing my eyes out I had no choice but to comply and take off my clothes in front of him. I got into the bathtub and if at first he let me wash myself he... quickly changed his mind. I'm sparing you the details but he touched me too." You said. "Thankfully at some point one of his men interrupted us and Rumlow left the bathroom. Before getting his hands on me he took off his jacket and his shirt and while I was crying in the bathtub I heard a vibrating noise. I searched through his stuff and when I had his phone between my hands I almost screamed out of relief."

"That's when you sent the text?" Steve asked.

"Hm." You nodded. "His phone was old and I was in a hurry so I wrote the quickest text I could and sent it to Bucky. Thankfully during his 10 days mission where I waited from a text from him-" You glanced at Bucky with a small smile. "I had time to learn his number by heart." You explained. "I don't know what happened outside but when Rumlow came back he didn't touch me again. He let me wash myself in peace, even though he kept staring at me and then I got out of the bath. The asshole couldn't fetch me a towel so I had to walk naked in front of him because he told me there was one in his room. When I finally covered myself-" You rolled your eyes as you rememberd.

"What..?" Sam asked.

"He told me that even if I was fat I wasn't unattractive and that my days in that place could get a lot more easier if I cooperated-"

"Blergh." Nat made a puking noise that made you smile slightly.

"Yeah, me too." You said. "I was lost in my thoughts thinking that I absolutely did not plan on staying there with him, that my place was with you all and by Bucky's side and when I realized what was going on... His lips were on mine." You let out. "I pushed his shoulders and stared at him in disbelief, I was shocked he did that. Then he said that I could rest in his room for the afternoon... but he would come for me in the night. The night you guys rescued me." You revealed.

"This is so awful." Bruce said.

"When I woke up my clothes were clean and on the edge of the bed so I put them on, then after some time I heard yelling outside and then loud steps coming towards the bedroom. Rumlow hit me so hard my cheek split open and before his man dragged me to the basement where Thor found me he grabbed the knife in his pocket and stabbed my ankle. You guys know the rest." You concluded.

"For fuck's sake." Sam cursed.

"I told you my stories weren't funny." You joked with the falcon.

"And everyone starts crying." Tony added to ease the mood but he was crying as well.

"Well, uh..." Steve coughed before taking a hold of himself. "I think Wanda's powers worked at least."

"You're welcome." She joked. She didn't ask questions or cry during your story because she already saw it all in your head. She witnessed what happened to you.

"It's so hard to believe that all of this happened." Bruce said. "We were worried and anxious about you during those 3 days but damn, it really was nothing compared to what **you** went through."

"I-" Thor sniffled. "I promise you [Y/N], nothing like that will ever happen to you." He said.

"Hey, like you all said it's over now. Rumlow is dead and I'm here with my family." You smiled as you squeezed Bucky's hand between yours. The winter soldier got out of his trance and brought your hands to his lips to kiss them while looking at you before speaking.

"I love you, [Y/N]." He said teary eyed.

"Me too, Bucky." You smiled emotionally before hugging him tightly. You didn't care if people were around you, you felt that he really needed this. "You're the love of my life." You whispered to his ear while rubbing his back.

"I'm gonna get you all tissues." Nat said as she got up from the floor where she was sitting.

"Wanda, thank you so much." You turned your head to look at her when you released your boyfriend. "It worked really well."

"Don't mention it." She smiled at you.

"I think there's a problem with dinner, it smells like burning in the hallway." Nat said when she came back with a box of tissues.

"Burning..?" Steve's eyes widened suddenly before he let out a gasp. Sam and Bucky realized as well.

"THE CAKE!" They jumped from their couch and ran to the kitchen.

"What cake?" Wanda asked. You shrugged, you had no idea what they were talking about. You got up and sat next to Tony on his couch.

"Please stop looking sad, I'm alright." You gently wiped a tear off his cheek before hugging him. "And thanks to Wanda it doesn't hurt me to think about it."

"I... I really wish we found you sooner." Tony let out.

"The most important thing is that I'm okay and I'm with you all." You smiled.

"You're really the strongest Avengers." He said.

"Oh c'mon, stop with that." You giggled slighty. "And you stop as well." You said as you looked at Thor. You got up and jumped on one foot towards him. "Sit down, I can't stand." You told him. The God of thunder obeyed you and you took back your seat on the couch. "Stop crying please. The only thing hurting me at the moment is seeing you all sad for me."

"I-I'm sorry..." He sniffled.

"Don't apologize." You smiled. "Please just stop crying." You took one of his hands and squeezed it in yours.

"Maybe I should've call-"

"No, we talked about this." You stared into his eyes. "It wouldn't have changed anything. Thor, I'm okay, alright?" You got up. "C'mon, let's go have dinner. I'm starving." You announced to everybody with a grin.

  
  


You all walked into the kitchen with coughs, the hallway was in smoke and it smelled burnt.

"What happened in here?" Nat asked. You found team cap trying to fan the smoke away with towels, at least nothing was on fire.

"We- uh..." Steve started.

"Yes?" Sharon asked. Bucky started walking towards you.

"Doll, I'm so sorry I- We tried to bake you a cake but we forgot about it and it burned in the oven." Bucky explained and your eyes widened.

"Y-You what..?" You asked in disbelief.

"It was his idea." Sam threw in. You jumped into the winter soldier's arms and hugged him tightly as you grinned.

"You are the best boyfriend in the world." You said to him before putting a quick kiss on his lips.

"Why are you rewarding me, it burned..." He said sadly.

"I don't care about it, I'm moved by the gesture." You placed your head against his chest as you hugged.

"I'm gonna get diabete if they keep being this sweet around me." Tony joked.

"Is dinner fine though?" Thor asked.

"It is. Only the cake burned." Steve replied.

"Well, take your seats everybody." Bruce said. "[Y/N] said she's starving."

Dinner was put on the table and then everyone started moving around you, they stopped you from moving because of your leg and Bucky was taking care of you anyway.

"Don't forget your pills." Steve said to you as he filled your glass with water.

"Yes, dad. Thank you." You joked. Steve rolled his eyes but then his lips curved into a smile.

"That leg is almost healed anyway, right?" Sam asked you.

"Yeah, I have like 3 days left. It doesn't hurt as much when I stand on it now." You explained. While you ate you noticed your boyfriend was rather quiet and it worried you. "Are you okay?" You gently nudged him on the side.

"Yeah..." Bucky replied quietly.

"You know I love you?" You asked him with a small smile.

"I do but doesn't hurt hearing it again." You succeeded to get him to smile a little.

"I love you, Bucky." You repeated as you leaned on him and left a kiss on his cheek. "You know... Now that you mentioned cake I'm kinda having a craving so I thought... maybe after dinner we could go get one?" You suggested.

"Can we get a cake at this hour though?" His brows furrowed.

"It's not even 8, I'm pretty sure there's still a bakery open in this city." You said. "We can take my new car and go get a cake for everyone, what do you say?" You asked.

"You know that if you asked me to go get you macarons from France I would for you, right?" You giggled.

"I'm not asking for that much Bucky but it's noted." You grinned.

"What are you two scheming?" Nat asked you and your boyfriend.

"Since we fucked up with the cake-" Bucky spoke. "I'm gonna get one for my doll after dinner."

"What? Like from outside?" Tony asked.

"It's still early, I'm pretty sure we'll find something for everybody. You all can enjoy your evening until we come back." He said.

"Alright, we'll wait for you two." Nat said. "I hope you make it back to the tower." She smirked.

"We will. Nothing gets between me and my cakes. Not even Bucky." You raised one eyebrow.

  
  


\---

  
  


"By the way it was a lie, the only thing that can get between me and food is you." You said before kissing Bucky in the elevator.

"Oh thanks God, you hurt my feelings back there." He joked. You stepped out of the lift and walked towards your new car in the parking lot.

"Here." You handed Bucky the keys.

"Don't you wanna sit on the driver's seat first? It's your car, not mine." He raised one eyebrow.

"You're wrong, it's your car as well and you're free to use it whenever you want. I don't have a license, remember?" You said.

"Don't you want to get one?" He asked you.

"Maybe someday... Not today though. C'mon, let's go get my cake." You smiled. Bucky opened the door on your side for you and then he put your crutches in the backseat. "Thanks." You said after he took his seat next to you.

"No, thank you." He smiled at you. You saw him lean towards you and you thought he was going to kiss your lips but he kissed your forehead instead.

"Are you sure you're okay? You've been acting weird." You asked.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Bucky gently replaced a strand of your hair behind your ear before starting the car. "Damn, Tony didn't play you with this car." He said after you heard the engine groan.

"Hmm." It was a poor attempt to change subjects but you let it slide. He will eventually talk to you about what's bothering him.

 


	73. Truth or Dare 2

"Oh my God they all look so delicious, I'll never make up my mind." You said as you brought your hands to your cheeks and stared at the exposed cakes behind the counter of the bakery.

"You got one word to say and they're all yours." Bucky smiled at you.

"Bucky you can't do that, you have to stop me." You giggled slightly.

"One cake will never be enough for everybody at the tower so you can take a few."

"Oh, that's true." You looked at him with starry eyes. "Okay, okay, which ones are we taking?"

"Hmm." The bakery seller was looking at you both, she seemed a bit annoyed. Maybe because it was getting late and you were her last customers of the night.

"This one is chocolate flavored but contains alcohol, I'm not sure everyone will like it. And this one has fruits but I'm not big on them..." You spoke out loud while looking at the different cakes.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't help overhearing your conversation-" The seller suddenly spoke.

"Um, yes?" You said.

"There's only 6 cakes left, you're my last customers and I won't put them on display tomorrow so how about you take them all? I'll give you a discount of course." She said to you. You glanced at Bucky and he shrugged.

"6 is good for everyone at the tower." He said to you.

"Okay. Well, then we'll take them all." You smiled.

  
  


"I thought she was going to kick us out." Bucky chuckled.

"Well, at least we won. We got 6 cakes and only paid for 3." You grinned. You got into the car and then headed for the tower.

"The car is really great." He commentated after some time where you both stayed silent during the ride.

"Sure is..." You let out as you looked outside.

"What?" He asked.

"What what?" You repeated.

"Why are you being... distant?" He asked you.

"Why don't you wanna tell me what's wrong?" You said as you turned your head to look at him. "And don't tell me there's nothing, you've been weird since Wanda used her powers on me."

"But really, there's nothing." He replied and you rolled your eyes.

"Fine, keep your secrets." You told the winter soldier.

"I don't have secrets." He added.

You finally made it to the tower. Bucky took the cakes since you were already grasping your crutches and then you took the elevator to join the living space.

"Did you guys rob the bakery?" Nat asked, her eyes widened when she saw your boyfriend carry six boxes.

"We couldn't decide and since we were the last customers the seller gave us a discount." You announced proudly. "What were you guys doing?" You asked the redhaired woman.

"Just having a drink, we were waiting for you both." She replied.

"Well, gather around everyone. There's enough cake for all of us." You grinned.

After you all shared the cakes you sat with everyone.

"So, we're a lot of people-" Nat started.

"Oh, I know this look." Tony said.

"Another truth or dare game?" Thor asked. Nat raised one eyebrow as she smirked.

"Exactly." She left out.

"I'm in." Steve said.

"Party Steve mode is back on." Bruce chuckled.

"Oho, what are you getting us into?" Sam grinned.

"Don't worry, only good things come out of this game." Nat said. "Last time a couple was born."

"And a kink." Bucky added. You gasped as you blushed instantly.

"A what?" Steve asked.

"N-Nothing! Forget whatever he said." You glared at Bucky who was sitting across you.

"Well, if you're all in I don't see why we wouldn't?" Wanda said, she spoke for herself and Vision.

"I'm in as well." Sharon said.

"Let's get this party started then." Tony grinned.

"How do we do it?" You asked.

"Don't worry, I got it all covered. And no cheating, I placed little papers with questions and dares in this box. I also put all our names in this randomizer app on my phone so everyone has a chance to get picked." She explained as she raised a little black box in front of her and then unlocked her phone.

"Let's go then." Thor announced.

"So... Oh, Steve!" She handed him the box so he could pick a paper.

"It's a truth." The captain said. "Describe your last embarrassing moment." His eyes widened and then the worst thing happened. He glanced towards Bucky and then you.

"Oh God..." You lowered your head. Bucky started laughing and you wanted to die.

"What?" Thor asked confused.

"I-I can't-" He started.

"Oh no, you have to." Tony encouraged him.

"Come on, it can't be that bad." Sam said.

"Fine..." Steve said as he put the paper down. "Remember the karaoke at the party before the mission?" They all nodded except Wanda and Vision but they kept silent. "Bucky and [Y/N] said they were going to talk after their songs... I-I found them in the kitchen." He muttered quickly. You tried to disappear into your couch hoping it would swallow you whole.

"I don't underst-" Bruce started and then his eyes widened.

"Holy shit" Nat let out. "Is this what you meant when we visited [Y/N] when she was recovering?" She asked Bucky. "You said the last time they saw each other they were trying to avoid the other."

"Please-" Tony pinched the bridge of his nose. "Please tell me you did not... In my kitchen? Where we all eat?"

"Don't worry we didn't get to f-"

"BUCK!" You shouted and then you heard the others around you start laughing.

"...Wow." Wanda let out, she seemed impressed and amused.

"Um, let's move on." Vision said.

"Yes, good idea." Steve said.

"Alright, the next one is... Sam!" The falcon picked his paper and read it.

"Truth as well. Which of the people who are in this game do you consider to have the best body?" He looked around him before answering. "I gotta give it to Natasha." Everyone agreed. She raised one eyebrow but said nothing.

"Next!" Tony said.

"Thor!" Once again the box was passed around.

"Kiss the person on your right." He read out loud.

"Not happening, buddy." Bruce said to the Asgardian.

"What are you afraid of, it's just a kiss." Sharon said.

"Close your eyes." Thor said with a smile after he placed his hands on Bruce's cheeks. The doctor sighed deeply but finally complied. Then the God of thunder put a long kiss on Bruce's lips until Bruce pushed him away by the shoulders.

"That was so beautiful." Nat commentated in amusement. You all laughed while he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. "Alright, next one is... [Y/N]!" You never had luck with this game so you hoped it wasn't something too embarrassing when you picked your paper.

"Name all the people you kissed that you can remember." You blushed slightly before sighing. "Bucky, Loki, Rumlow and-" Bucky's eyes widened. He was aware of these three people but who was the fourth one? "Nat." You concluded.

"What?" They all let out.

"Oh true, we did." She rememberd with a grin.

"When was that?? And where were we?" Tony asked.

"A-A few days after the party for my birthday..." You said.

"What was the context??" Bucky asked.

"I was defending your ass." She threw at him.

"By kissing my girl?" He asked.

"Remember how mad [Y/N] was at you after the party? She thought that kiss was the biggest act of treason of all times-"

"H-Hey!" You threw a bit embarrassed.

"Honey, you were a mess." You rolled your eyes and then stayed silent on your couch.

"I told her, to defend you-" She raised one of her eyebrows at Bucky. "That it was just a kiss and it wasn't that bad. She didn't want to believe me so I kissed her." She let out with a smirk.

"The length you'd go to prove your point..." Wanda chuckled.

"It worked, didn't it?" Nat asked.

"It did." You said after you sighed.

"Alright. Next one is... Bucky." The winter soldier grabbed the box and then picked a paper.

"Show everyone your 5 most recent pictures in your phone." He read.

"Does Bucky even use his phone?" Sam asked. "Never saw him on that thing."

"Didn't either." You said. You were curious about what kind of pictures he could have though. Bucky raised an eyebrow as he unlocked his phone and then Nat leaned on him to check the pictures.

"Oh my God." She chuckled lowly.

"Of course..." Tony leaned as well. You looked at everyone move towards the winter soldier to check his phone and then you grasped your crutches, you were about to move to have a look as well but the others gestured you to not move. Nat took the phone and walked towards you. You blushed instantly.

"This can't be real..." You let out.

"It's so adorable though." Wanda commentated.

"I think it's creepy." Sam joked.

"I can't believe you take pictures of me when I'm sleeping, you literally never use your phone." You said to Bucky.

"I only use it for emergencies." He smirked and you started blushing as you stared at him in disbelief.

"Ooh, smooth." Nat commentated with a low chuckle. "Alright, next one is... Wanda!" She revealed after she glanced at her phone. The scarlet witch picked her paper and read it to everybody.

"If you had to be stuck on a deserted island with anybody in this room, who would you pick?" She took Vision's hand before replying. "I'm sorry but I'll probably pick Tony. He can build something and get us out." She explained with an amused smile.

"Smart." Tony replied before taking a sip of his drink.

"Next one is... Sharon." Like everybody else, she picked her paper and read it.

"Hug the last person you had an argument with." The female agent rolled her eyes before getting up and walking towards the winter soldier to everyone's surprise.

"Wha- When did you two argue?" Sam asked.

"None of your business." Bucky replied as he got up. The two of them hugged and then took back their seats. Your brows furrowed, you wondered what was their argument about.

"Okay... Tony, your turn." Nat said.

"Trade clothes with the person on your left." He turned his head and found Steve staring at him in surprise. "He's gonna rip my shirt." Tony said as he looked at the captain's muscled torso.

"Oh my God wait, I have an idea-" You said and it surprised everyone. "Wear each other's suits." You grinned.

"Haha, that's excellent." Thor cheered.

"C'mon, go wear them!" Nat told them. The two sighed before exiting the room to get their clothes.

When they came back you all exploded in laughters. That was a sight to not miss. Steve was having trouble walking with the iron suit on and Tony was basically swimming in the captain's suit. Even if it looked too tight on Steve it was still too big for Tony.

"Do an impression of each other!" Sam proposed as he laughed.

"I want you for America!" Tony did a military salute as he badly imitated Steve, the laughters grew louder.

"Very funny." Steve rolled his eyes.

"Bucky, I think this calls for an emergency." Nat said to him.

"I agree." The winter soldier pulled out his phone and took a picture of the two men. After this they went back to change before returning to continue the game with you all.

"Next one is... Oh, me." The redhaired woman announced. "Kiss the person of the same gender you first met in your group." Nat looked around her as she tried to remember. "I think it was Sharon. Well, come here girl." She smirked as she got up. The blonde female agent got up as well and then they shared a kiss in front of you all.

"It's getting hot in here..." Sam said.

"Uh hum." Bruce coughed when it got longer than necessary. They finally released each other and took back their seats. Most of the people looked embarrassed.

"Alright, next." Steve said.

"It's... Vision!" He picked a paper and read it.

"When was the last time you watched an adult movie?" He read. "Um, never I believe." He replied.

"That can't be true." Tony said.

"I mean it's him... It's Vision." Thor said. "I don't find it odd."

"I don't think he's lying either." Bruce added.

"Alright then. Next one is... You, Bruce." The doctor grabbed the box and then picked his paper.

"Have you ever paid for sex?" His eyes widened. "What kind of questions did you put in there?" He asked Natasha.

"I hoped this question would go to Tony or Steve." She explained with a low chuckle before taking a sip of her drink.

"What?" The two men replied in fake offense.

"No, I never paid for sex." Bruce replied truthfully.

"It's getting late, do you wanna do a last one?" Nat asked. You all nodded so she tapped on her phone for the randomizer to pick someone. "[Y/N]!" You grabbed the box and picked a paper.

"What is the most beautiful thing someone has said to you?" You read. You bit onto your lower lip before replying. "I love you for who you are not for what you can give me." You glanced at Bucky and smiled timidly, a blush had crept on your cheeks.

"Aw, that's adorable." The redhaired woman commentated.

"Alright, goodnight." Bucky got up and then walked towards you to pick you up in his arms. You held your crutches in one hand and your other arm wrapped around his neck. You bid goodnight to everybody before your boyfriend walked out of the living space to join the elevator. You gently kissed his cheek in the lift.

"Drop me in my room first please, I wanna change clothes." You asked him.

"Of course, doll." He smiled at you. Then you started thinking.

"Let's sleep in my room tonight, go change in yours and then join me." You smiled at him when he gently put you on your bed.

"But you can't change on your own-"

"Yes I can, Bucky." You giggled slightly. "C'mon, go." He sighed but finally left you. You removed the clothes you were wearing and then grabbed the clothes you were going to wear before entering your bathroom. After you finished cleaning yourself you heard a knock at your door and then someone enter.

"It's me." Bucky announced himself.

"I'm in the bathroom, hold on." You said. The winter soldier got on your bed and waited for you. You were taking some time so he got worried.

"Do you need help?" He asked.

"No, I'm good." You replied. You took a deep breath before grabbing the handle, you opened the bathroom door and stepped out. Bucky lifted his head when he heard you and then his eyes instanly widened and his jaw dropped.

"W-W-W-What is this? What are you wearing?" He was blushing.

"It's called a night gown." You explained. "I... Nat made me buy it back when you had your mission." You said while you walked towards the bed.

"I-I don't know what to say-" Oh God, you wanted to disappear you felt so stupid.

"I get it, you hate it and I look stupid." You sat on the edge of the bed and passed your hands on your face. "This is so embarrassing."

"No, doll... You're beautiful but you don't need this to please me-" He came behind you, Bucky put his hand on your shoulder but you got up to go on your side of the bed. You slided under the covers and kept silent, you felt so humiliated. "Doll..."

"Please stop, I feel so dumb." You said as you gave him your back. You closed your eyes and tried so hard to hold back your tears.

"I-I'm really sorry, doll. I didn't mean to hurt your feelings." He said after he approached you. Bucky wrapped his arm around your waist and caressed your stomach with his hand. "Please don't cry." He heard you sniffle. "I'm so sorry." He made you turn around so he could hug you.

"I get it." You said after you pushed against Bucky's torso with your hands so he could release you.

"You get what?" He asked.

"Wearing those kind of clothes, it's a pretty girl thing and I'm not. I was stupid to believe it would please you. I can't believe I actually wor-"

"Stop! The only thing you're being right now is ridiculous. You are pretty-"

"No! You stop!" You cried. "I-I never felt more stupid in my entire life!" You got up from your bed and then locked yourself in the bathroom.

"Oh for fuck's sake-" Bucky muttered before getting up as well. "Please come out." He knocked against your bathroom door. "Please doll... I don't want to fight... Not after everything that's happened..."

"Why would you say that to me and make me feel like this?" You asked him as you cried after opening the door.

"Doll, it wasn't my attention, I'm very sorry." Bucky approached you and then hugged you against him.

"Y-You know I never wore stuff like this, I-I just-"

"Shh, I know." He caressed your hair as he gently rocked you against him. "Come back on the bed, I don't want you to stand on your leg for too long." He took your hand and guided you back on the mattress. "Come here." He opened his arms for you when you both laid on the bed. You hugged each other while you cried. Bucky put a kiss against your forehead.

"Are you gonna tell me why you seemed weird today?" You asked him after you calmed down.

"I... I'm just worried about you." He said. You raised your head and looked at him. "The... brainwashing thing brought some really bad memories." He explained. "I was afraid it would happen to you. It worked but then you told the story of your kidnapping and... I-I couldn't stop thinking about how bad things could've gone..."

"Bucky..." You brought your hands to his cheeks and stared into his eyes. "I'm right here and I'm fine." You really wanted to reassure him. "This is over now, this bad episode is behind us."

"I know..." He sighed deeply. "Doesn't stop me from thinking about it though."

"Why didn't you just tell me instead of dealing with this by yourself?" You asked.

"It's nothing- And I didn't want to worry you." He explained.

"You're worrying me when you're acting like you did today. I don't want you to torture yourself with this." You hugged him tightly against you. "Please, no more okay? Or I'll ask Wanda to help you too." He smiled slightly.

"No thank you, I'm good." He replied. You licked your lips before leaning on his face and then you kissed him passionately. You pushed on his shoulder to make him lay on the bed then you went on your fours and climbed above him. You kept kissing Bucky while your hands travelled on his clothed torso. You tried to slip them under his shirt but he stopped you. "No... Not tonight." He said.

"Oh, wow. Okay." Your eyes widened in surprise. You got off him and laid on your side of the bed.

"A-Are you upset?" He asked a bit nervously.

"No. I'm just a bit surprised-" You raised one eyebrow. "You've tried many times before Wanda helped and now that I can and want to you don't..." You lowered your gaze. "It's really this shitty gown huh?" You let out dryly.

"L-Listen, you seem really upset and I don't want to make it worse so I think it's better if I sleep in my room tonight." You stared at him in disbelief while he got up.

"Okay. Good fucking night, Buck." You threw before turning around and giving him your back. You called him Buck. This time he knew it, you were upset.

 


	74. Girls Just Wanna Have Fun

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for 400 kudos! <3

Finally your leg was healed and you didn't need your crutches anymore. You looked at your ankle when you sat on your bed, you had an ugly scar but at least it didn't hurt anymore and you could walk. You rolled your eyes and sighed deeply when you thought back at Bucky. Last night was really weird and you had no idea how the situation escalated so badly.

You got up and first things first you took off your gown and threw it in the trash bin next to your desk. If Bucky didn't like it you had no more reasons to keep it. You went in the bathroom to clean yourself before going downstairs. When you stood in front of your closet with a towel wrapped around your body you had no idea what to wear.

Second you absolutely wanted to make Bucky regret leaving you alone last night. Everytime you said no to him he played with you by going shirtless or make you touch him. You were going to make him have a taste of his own medicine after he said no to you. You picked a pair of high waisted jeans and one of the new tops Nat made you buy. She told you she noticed Bucky had a thing for your neck so you picked an off-shoulder top and after fixing your necklace around your neck you went into the bathroom to put your hair up. Your neck was now the first thing people would notice on you, it was the most exposed part of your body.

You checked yourself one last time in front of the mirror and then you went out of your room. As always when you walked past his bedroom you had no idea if he was there or not. You pushed the elevator button and then stepped in.

"Good morning, my leg is healed!" You announced happily to everyone as you walked inside the kitchen.

"Good morning [Y/N], I'm glad for you." Steve smiled brightly at you before hugging you between his strong arms.

"Thank you." You smiled and hugged him back.

"You seem happy." Nat noticed. "Did you sleep well?" She smirked.

"Excellent." You replied. "I had the bed all to myself, it was very comfortable." You raised one eyebrow as you smirked. You saw Bucky was around the table when you walked into the dining room but you ignored him. Everyone was confused when you said you slept by yourself, they knew that since you and Bucky were together you slept in the same bedroom. They looked in his direction but no one said anything. "Is this seat taken?" You asked Vision.

"Yes, it's Wanda's. But I believe the one next to it is free." He replied.

"Thanks." You said before taking the other free seat.

"There's so many of us now." Bruce commentated with a small smile.

"Yeah, it's so rare." Tony added. Wanda came back to her seat, she was making a tea for herself behind the counter.

"Hi, [Y/N]." She greeted you with a smile when she sat down.

"Good morning." You smiled back at her. You didn't dare to turn your head the other way. You didn't want to. Because it was Bucky sitting next to you.

"C'mon, man." Sam said discreetly to the winter solder as he nudged him. Bucky crossed eyes with him before sighing.

"Good morning, [Y/N]." He finally said to you. You hated how he always made your heart jump.

"No more doll?" You replied as you raised one eyebrow before taking a sip of your milk. His lips curved into a small smirk. Oh, he knew what you were doing.

"Good morning, _doll_." He corrected himself.

"Hi." You said.

"I made pancakes!" Steve announced happily as he put the plate on the table. He was so cute, you knew they were his favorites. The captain finally sat around the table to have breakfast with everybody.

"You look gorgeous." Bucky said to you. He couldn't help his eyes wander on your exposed neck. He almost hated how spotless it was, there used to be his hickeys on you and he loved the sight. It showed to everybody you belonged to him.

"Uh huh." You said as you kept avoiding his eyes. You grabbed one of Steve's pancakes and put it on your plate to cover it with your favorite topping. As you looked for it on the table you suddenly crossed eyes with Nat, she winked and discreetly made an okay sign to you with her hand. You didn't know if she did it because of the clothes you decided to wear or if it was because you were giving Bucky a hard time. Like everyone else the redhaired woman noticed something must've happened between you both last night.

"I'm in trouble." The winter soldier whispered to Sam next to him. You continued your breakfast in peace until Nat spoke.

"Since I'm not used to having girls around here what do you say we go out this afternoon?" She suggested.

"I'm in." You replied immediately and Nat grinned at you.

"It could be fun, I'll come as well." Sharon added. You looked at Wanda.

"C'mon!" You pleaded her. She looked at Vision and he nodded.

"Fine, I'll come." She replied.

"Yay!" You said excitedly. You didn't particulary care about Sharon but you loved Nat and Wanda, this was going to be a fun afternoon.

"Awesome." Nat replied. "2pm in the parking lot."

"I see how it is." Steve said and then you four girls started laughing.

"Don't worry, when everyone is gone we'll have our days out with [Y/N] and Bucky like in the old times." She reassured the captain. You raised one eyebrow as you lowered your head with a small smile.

"Why are you smiling?" Bucky suddenly asked you.

"Is that not allowed?" You replied. Your brows furrowed and you looked under the table when you felt something touch you. "What do you think you're doing?" You asked the winter soldier.

"Is that not allowed?" He repeated and you stared at him.

"Are you mocking me?" You asked.

"You know I would never." He replied as he stared back into your eyes.

"What do you want, Bucky?" You asked him seriously now.

"You." He replied. You rolled your eyes.

"Very funny."

"I'm not joking."

"Make up your mind then, yesterday you were very clear." You spat.

"You can't be mad at me for not being in the mood." His brows furrowed in confusion.

"Who said anything about being mad? I'm the one that's not in the mood at the moment." You got up from your seat and left the kitchen. The others looked at you leave.

"Please just tell us you both have not fought again." Tony said.

  
  


\---

  
  


You were reading on your bed when suddenly you heard a knock on your door.

"Come in." You shouted to whoever was in the hallway. You brought your eyes back to your book when the winter soldier entered your room.

"What are you doing?" He asked.

"Cooking." You replied sarcastically.

"I've missed your jokes." He said with a smile. Bucky walked into your room and then his eyes stopped on your trash bin. "What's that?" He asked as he leaned to look at the night gown you threw this morning before he went to pick it up.

"Leave it in there, it's trash anyway." You said after you glanced at him.

"You're... throwing it?" He asked.

"Why would I keep it?" You asked as well.

"Because it suited you." He replied and you rolled your eyes before sighing deeply.

"Okay, the least you could do is not lie." You said.

"Have I ever lied to you?"

"You just did. You hated this thing yesterday, why would you care about me throwing it away today?"

"Because... I feel bad." He admitted truthfully.

"So I'm just supposed to keep it around because you feel bad? This thing will just remind me of what happened last night, throw it. I don't want to see it anymore and I certainly will never wear it again." You said.

"Are you mad?"

"Do I look mad, Buck?!" You asked loudly as you put down your book.

"Is... Is that a trick question-"

"Get out." You said to him.

"Are you mad at me because I didn't want to sleep with you?" He asked in confusion.

"I said I'm not mad!"

"Then why are you yelling at me?"

"Because you keep saying I'm mad when I'm not!"

"Alright... Why are you upset?" He asked. You stared at him in disbelief, you felt stings in your heart and you knew you were about to cry.

"I... I-I can't believe you left me by myself last night after making me feel so bad because of that shitty gown!" You bit onto your lower lip to prevent it from trembling but it did anyway and then you couldn't help crying. "I felt like the most repulsive thing on Earth, I can't believe **you** out of all people would make me feel like this!"

"Doll..." He tried to approach you but you yelled at him again.

"No! Don't come near me!" You threw your book at him. "I lied earlier! I spent the most awful night!"

"I-I'm really sorry..." Bucky said as he approached you anyway.

"I've had enough of hearing you say you're sorry everytime you hurt me." You said.

"Wha- What can I do?" He asked.

"For now you can leave me." You said to him.

"I-I want to stay..." He said. "I really missed you last night. I love you, doll." You got up and then leaned to pick up your book. Bucky absolutely did not miss the show displayed in front of him with your butt in those jeans but he got interrupted when you put the book between his hands.

"Read." You said to him.

"What?" He asked, he was confused.

"I slept really badly yesterday so I'm gonna nap. Read to me." You explained to him and then raised one eyebrow. "That's the best you're gonna get from me, Buck." You added.

"Please don't call me Buck, you only do it when you're upset."

"Stop upsetting me then." You said as you got on your bed. He sat on the edge and sighed before reading for you.

"Ok first of all, what the hell is this?" He asked after he read two lines.

"One of the horror books Bruce gave me." You smiled.

"You enjoy this stuff?" He asked you.

"Wouldn't be reading it if I didn't enjoy it." You replied.

"You're gonna give me nightmares with this." He said.

"Please, feel free to walk out if you don't want to stay." You said as you raised one eyebrow.

"You're so cruel to me." He chuckled slightly. "I'd rather hold you and kiss your skin if you want to nap."

"Yeah, I really would've wanted that too _last night_."

"You really are upset because I didn't want to sleep with you, huh?" He smiled in amusement.

"Shut up about that! I'm not some kind of monster, I would've never forced you!" You yelled at him. "My God, just get out. You can't even do something as simple as read, you're always pushing me until I explode! Ugh!" You turned around on your bed and gave him your back.

"Doll, please-" He laid next to you as well and then approached you to big spoon you from behind but you jumped from the bed.

"Stop!"

"I'm not reading that." He pointed to your book.

"Then get out! I'll read by myself and sleep."

"[Y/N], what do you want from me?" He asked, he sounded tired.

"What I would've liked is for you to not make me feel like shit yesterday. Make me feel so stupid in a thing I was never confident to wear. What I would've wanted is for you to not leave me by myself after turning me down as if I wasn't capable of controlling myself!" You shouted the last sentence as you cried.

"Okay, okay. I get it." He said. "Please stop crying. You're not upset because I said no but because I made you feel humiliated. I'm sorry doll."

"Ha." You let out a dry chuckle. You were so tired of hearing that. "Can you leave now? I want to sleep so I'm not in a bad mood for my afternoon with the girls."

"Okay." At long last. "But first kiss me." Your eyes widened.

"You're out of your mind if you think the thing I absolutely want right now is a kiss." You said as you wiped your tears.

"Then let me hold you while you sleep." He bargained again.

"No way." You replied. "Get off my bed Bucky, I'm exhausted." You said as you sat on the edge.

"But I miss you." You rolled your eyes as you sighed.

"You know what? Whatever. I'm way too tired to argue." You laid on your bed and gave him your back. God, he wanted to touch you so badly, your clothes drove him crazy but mostly you did, your attitude, everything. He loved you so much but he wasn't a monster and he wasn't going to touch you if you didn't want to. Bucky wanted to stay with you so he finally picked up your book and read it for you even if he hated it. You smiled slightly as you closed your eyes.

  
  


\---

  
  


You were chilling in the living space with Wanda until it was time to go meet with the two other girls in the parking lot. Nat and Sharon stepped out of the lift and joined you two.

"We can use my car." You said as you threw the keys to Nat.

"So where are we going?" Sharon asked her after you exited the parking lot of the tower.

"I booked us an appointment at the beauty salon." She smirked. "We have the whole place for ourselves." You never went there so you wondered what was going to happen.

When you arrived there it looked very luxurious. As soon as you stepped in the female employees came to take care of you lot. You were going to get your nails done first so the four of you sat on comfy seats and let the employees work. They cleaned your feet and hands, gave you a massage as well and then did your nails. It felt really good and relaxing.

"So, [Y/N]-" Nat started. "Are you gonna tell us what happened between you and Bucky?"

"When you two left the game last night you seemed happy." Wanda commentated.

"It's kinda embarrassing..." You said.

"For who?" Sharon asked.

"I don't know... Me, him..." You replied. "I... Before Wanda used her powers on me Bucky tried to be intimate with me again since the hospital you know..." You explained.

"Okay, and then?" Nat asked.

"Well, I-I couldn't because I was traumatized and didn't want to be touched, even by him-" You said. "Then after Wanda used her powers on me Bucky started acting weird... I didn't know what was going on. He also avoided the topic."

"Did he tell you why last night?" Wanda asked.

"Yeah... He was just very worried, you know brainwashing is a sensitive topic... And I totally understand him but everything went well at the end."

"So what went wrong?" Sharon asked.

"It's the embarrassing part..." You replied. "During your mission with him and Sam, Nat and I went shopping-"

"Oh, did you finally wear something?" The redhaired woman asked with a grin.

"...Yes." You blushed.

"And...?" Nat asked.

"He... didn't like it." You replied.

"What?? How so?" Her eyes widened.

"He said I didn't need to wear stuff like that to please him but... I-I just felt so stupid, it was the first time I wore a night gown, I was never confident enough to even look at one you know... Anyway we kinda argued but then it got solved..."

"Then why are you still... I mean you seemed upset at him this morning." Wanda said.

"Because then we fought again..." You revealed.

"What happened?" Nat asked.

"I... We got into bed and after the first argument we started kissing and it was going well. I-I tried taking things a little further since you know I was no longer traumatized so we could sleep together again but he stopped me. H-He said no..."

"Oh my God..."

"I was a little... baffled you know but I-I'm not a monster, I wouldn't have forced him if he didn't want to but then he... He left the bed and went to sleep in his room."

"I can't imagine how you felt." Sharon said.

"Well, let me tell you. I felt so fucking stupid and repulsive and ugly... I-I can't believe he would do that." You said as your brows furrowed.

"Why did he leave you?" Wanda asked.

"He said I looked upset and he didn't want to make it worse so he preferred if I was left on my own. It just made things so much worse." You explained.

"Why did you wear the new clothes I made you buy this morning?" Nat asked.

"I wanted him to really regret leaving me alone last night. I know you said he liked my neck so I wore this top and I think it kinda worked, he complimented me when we were having breakfast and then he made sure I was missing nothing when we had lunch earlier but ugh- I'm still annoyed you know." You explained.

"Yeah, I get it. Like I told you, boys are stupid." The four of you laughed slightly.

You continued speaking about everything and nothing after you were done with your nails then you the employees did your hair and makeup and finally you left the beauty salon.

"Let's go have a drink before we return to the tower." Nat announced happily.

 


	75. The Real Deal

You were sitting around a table on a terrace of a café, the sun was starting to set but it was still bright and nice outside.

"Thank you for this afternoon Nat, it was really relaxing." Sharon said to her. You and Wanda nodded as you smiled meaning you felt the same.

"You're welcome girls, it was nice to not be surrounded by men for once." She smiled as well before taking a sip of her coffee. "[Y/N] your hair looks amazing."

"Thank you." You smiled shyly.

"So, do you know what you're gonna do with Bucky?" She asked. You sighed.

"I have no idea. I mean I love him obviously but I'm so tired of fighting with him, I feel like we only do that." You lowered your head.

"But you two always get back together." Sharon said to you. She had a point.

"I don't plan on leaving him-" You instantly replied.

"But you want a little something?" Nat smirked.

"You know me so well." You said to her and your lips curved into a smile.

"Remember what else I made you buy?" You started thinking and then you nodded. "I think it's time to wear them."

"Oh my God, you don't mean those..."

"Why not? I already caught him drooling staring at your cleavage during lunch, if he catches a glimpse at those under your skirt you're gonna have him wrapped around your little finger."

"Um, catch a glimpse of what? Me and Sharon are a bit lost here." Wanda interrupted you both.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Nat made me buy..." You couldn't even say it, you were too embarrassed.

"Stockings and a garter belt." Nat replied for you with an amused grin.

"Oh wow, the real deal huh?" Sharon said before taking a sip of her drink.

"You should do it." Wanda encouraged you.

"Oh my God, you think so as well?" You asked. "I-I don't know, he hated the night gown. If he reacts badly this time as well I'm gonna pack my bags and leave." You let out dramatically. The girls laughed slightly.

"I don't think he hated the gown, I think maybe yesterday he just wasn't in the mood if he even refused to have sex." Nat explained to you. "C'mon, who here thinks [Y/N] should wear the sexy lingerie?" The redhaired woman raised her hand as she asked the question. Wanda and Sharon followed.

"Fine." You finally let out. "I'll wear them tonight."

"Yay!" They cheered in victory.

  
  


\---

  
  


"What happened with your girl, man?" Sam asked Bucky. These two and Steve also decided to go outside in the afternoon since they had nothing better to do. They were having a drink at a bar.

"If only I knew... Women are so complicated." Bucky sighed.

"Why is she mad at you?" Steve asked.

"Why do you assume she's the one mad at me and not the inverse?" The winter soldier replied in an overly dramatic offended tone.

"Uh, because I've seen you look mad at her." The captain replied. Bucky rolled his eyes.

"Fine. I... may have hurt her feelings." He replied. "She... tried to be intimate last night and I... turned her down."

"What? Why?" Sam asked. "Is she... not good?" He dared to ask and Bucky's eyes widened.

"Don't ever say that. She's... perfect." He smiled slightly as he rememberd some things you did to him. "I'm not gonna go into the details-"

"Please, don't." Steve interrupted him.

"But I'm very satisfied." Bucky grinned.

"Is that so?" Sam raised one eyebrow. "Then what was the problem yesterday?"

"I just wasn't in the mood. The whole brainwashing thing, I kept thinking about it." He explained.

"But after the game you looked well." Sam said.

"Yeah and honestly I just wanted to hold her in my arms before sleeping but... she had other plans..."

"She's mad at you because you said no?" Steve asked.

"Well, uh... Not exactly... Something else happened before that."

"What?" The falcon asked.

"She... God, she's gonna end me if she knows I talked about this." Bucky passed a hand on his face. "Let's just say, she wore something she never wore before and... I didn't react like she wanted me to..."

"Okay, I-I... I'm hearing way too much." Steve said.

"It was nothing extravagant or bold you know, don't go imagining weird stuff about my girl." The winter soldier said. "But it's my fault, I know how she is, wearing that was probably a big step to her and I ruined it. When I checked on her after breakfast I found it in her trash bin."

"Oooh, that bad?" Sam asked.

"And I made it worse..." He continued.

"How?" The captain asked.

"Well, doll was mad at me about this thing first and then I didn't want to fight all night with her, I know I would've gotten mean at some point so... I decided to leave her bedroom." He sighed deeply. "I let her sleep by herself. I-It was the first time I left her by herself since the..."

"Yeah, we know." Steve said.

"She told me she lied this morning, when she came for breakfast and told everybody she slept really well. It was a lie, she had an awful night. I feel like such an asshole." Bucky finished his drink after speaking.

"It's not you both's first fight, it's gonna get better." Sam reassured him.

"Yeah, I bet even Nat is already working on her on their side." Steve added.

"I miss my doll so much, she looked so good this morning. I just wanted to get my hands on her." Bucky smiled sadly. "She knows I love kissing and biting her neck, I bet she wore that top on purpose."

"I think it was a coincidence, I don't think [Y/N] is like that." The captain said as he furrowed his brows.

"Oh, I don't think she thought of it on her own. Nat has a bad influence on her." The two other men started laughing.

"What?" Sam let out after he slapped his thigh as if he just heard the best joke in the world. "C'mon man, you can't be serious."

"I am. She does a bunch of stuff and then tells me it's Nat who showed her." Bucky explained.

"Yeah but to go to the length of saying Nat has a bad influence on her... And didn't you just say you liked her outfit this morning?" Steve defended his female best friend.

"Anyway, it's getting late." Bucky said as he got up. "I wanna drop by a place before we go back to the tower."

  
  


\---

  
  


"Thanks for the car, [Y/N]." Nat said before throwing you back your keys.

"No problem, I spent a great afternoon." You smiled.

"Same." Wanda said. The four of you stepped inside the elevator and then headed to the living space.

"Weird, there's nobody." Sharon commentated.

"Maybe they went out as well." You said as you took a seat on the couch.

"What do you think you're doing?" Nat asked you.

"Uhh, resting?" You replied.

"No, no. Go change right now before I let you change your mind." She grabbed your arm and made you stand up again. "Come on, we'll come with you."

"Fine." You raised your eyes to the sky before walking out of the room with the girls. You made it to your floor and then went into your bedroom. You opened your closet to search for the item of clothing.

"[Y/N], what's this?" Nat asked as she pointed to the trash bin.

"Oh God, not again-" You muttered.

"Why did you throw it?" Wanda asked. The girls recognized the night gown you were talking about.

"Because Bucky hated it and made me feel awful wearing it, I don't wanna see that thing anymore." You explained. "Please just let it in there." You pleaded the girls.

"We told you, he just wasn't in the mood..." They tried explaining to you.

"I don't care, this thing holds bad memories now. If he wants me to wear one all he has to do is ask or gift me one." You said as you went through your closet. "But I'm never taking these kind of bold and risky initiatives anymore."

"Fine..." They let you. They knew how you were and how you worked, if you didn't want to consider it it meant it really hurt your feelings and it was the case.

"Here they are." You said as you grabbed the stockings and garter belt.

"Good, go change with those panties and bra I made you buy as well. I'm gonna go through your skirts and tops to create you a nice outfit." Nat grinned as she pushed you towards the bathroom. You couldn't even argue, you just did as she said. A few minutes later she knocked on the bathroom door to hand you the skirt and top. "He's gonna die." She smirked mischievously as she gave you the clothes.

"Well?" You asked after you stepped out of the bathroom for their opinions. You wore a tight fitting black mini skirt and an intense bright red long sleeved crop top. Under your clothes you wore black laced lingerie and of course the black thigh high stockings and garter belt.

"[Y/N], you look so hot!" Nat cheered.

"You do, you look amazing." Wanda added.

"I agree." Sharon said as well. "With your hair and makeup done at the beauty salon it's perfect."

"Try leaning a bit over." Nat asked you. "Haha! It's amazing, we can see the strap appear on your thigh."

"You're having way too much fun with this, Nat." You chuckled slightly. You were amused by her reactions.

"Put these on as well." She handed you a pair of simple black boots with heels. "You're shorter than Bucky so it's fine if you wear heels, I'm pretty sure you still won't reach him." She joked.

"We should head down, it's almost time for dinner." Wanda said.

"Everyone must be downstairs already." Sharon said. You took a deep breath.

"Alright, let's go." You said with determination.

  
  


"Where are the girls?" Tony asked. "It sure is quiet in here without them." The boys were already in the kitchen waiting for you all.

"I heard the elevator, they must be coming." Steve said. Then they heard steps and voices in the hallway so Tony thought finally there was going to be some kind of entertainment in the kitchen. He spent the whole afternoon in the lab with Bruce and then Thor and Vision joined them because everyone else was gone. Besides Thor poking a bit of fun at Bruce their afternoon was pretty boring.

"Hey, boys." Nat greeted them when she stepped first into the dining room.

"Wh- Finally." Tony let out a bit grumpy.

"Are we late?" Sharon asked.

"Not at all." Steve replied.

"Hey, good evening." You leaned on Tony who was sitting down around the table and hugged him from behind.

"Oh, you must be shitting me..." Bucky muttered. He nudged Sam next to him to check if he was seeing the same thing as him.

"Hi, sweetheart." Tony could never be mad at you. "Where did y'all go?" He asked you.

"Nat took us to a beauty salon." You replied with a smile.

"Did you have a good time?" Vision asked Wanda when they released each other from their hug.

"We did, it was fun." She replied.

"Take your seats girls or Tony will throw a tantrum." Bruce joked.

"Ah, sorry." You said before putting your hand over a chair next to Tony to pull it but Nat was quicker than you.

"I believe your seat is over there." She gestured you the chair next to the winter soldier. You rolled your eyes before walking over there. He stared at you the whole time since you entered the kitchen. But then you leaned over Tony and it's your legs, your thighs precisely he couldn't stop glancing at.

"Hey-" Bucky let out quietly, his voice got stuck in his throat so he coughed to sound more confident then he repeated. "Hey."

"Hi." You replied before pulling back the chair next to him. You avoided his gaze as you sat.

"You... look very pretty." He gulped. God, you felt your heart jump and that little sting in your lower stomach again.

"Thanks." You replied. Then he took your hand in his and if at first you flinched you didn't remove it. Bucky simply looked at your fingers before speaking.

"It's cute." He smiled slightly as he commentated your manicure and then he brought his gaze back to your face. "You're beautiful." You bit onto your lower lip as you finally locked eyes with him. Bucky slowly tangled his fingers with yours. God, he made you so nervous now.

"T-Thank you." You said. Then everyone started shifting around you to exchange the random plates of food and dishes to fill their plates.

"What about you guys, what did you do?" Nat asked them.

"We stayed here." Bruce replied. "Me and Tony at the lab and then Vision and Thor joined us." The doctor explained.

"Steve, Bucky and I went to a bar to have a drink." Sam replied as well.

"Oh, what did you talk about?" Nat raised one eyebrow. She knew they probably talked about the same thing as your group did. Your couple.

"Men stuff." Bucky replied suddenly.

"What did **you** talk about?" Steve asked.

"Women stuff." You replied. Your lips curved into a small smirk. You and Bucky glanced at each other quickly without saying anything then you pretended to be busy with your food again.

"[Y/N], can you pass me the salt?" Nat asked.

"Um, sure." You grabbed it and then reached for her hand but she didn't move.

"Ah, my arm is too short. I can almost grab it, can you lean-" You almost let out a chuckle. You knew what she wanted you to do. "-over?"

"Of course." You replied with a smile. Nat discreetly winked at you. You got up and then leaned across the table to reach her. Bucky turned to look at you and he saw the beginning of your panties appear the further you leaned. Nat saw his eyes widen so much she thought they were going to pop out of his head. Thankfully the winter soldier was the only who could see your little show.

"Thank you, sweetie." She grinned at you after taking the salt.

"No problem." You straightened and lowered your skirt before sitting back on your seat. Bucky started fanning himself with his hand, his forehead was starting to sweat.

"So, what do you guys wanna do tonight?" Steve asked. "I felt like watching a movie with everybody." The captain suggested.

"That's a good idea." Wanda smiled.

"Yeah, I'm in as well." Bruce replied. Thor nodded meaning he will be attending too.

"It will be fun." Sam said. Everyone agreed, you had nothing to do so you were interested.

"Me too-" You started but the winter soldier put his hand on your forearm. He had different plans for you.

"Tsk, not you." Bucky said to you. Your brows furrowed as you turned your head to look at him. "We have to talk." He explained.

"Awesome, there goes my fun night." You rolled your eyes. "What do you think gives you the right to decide of my evening plans?" You asked him.

"Uh, I'm your boyfriend?" He said as he stared at you.

"[Y/N], it's fine. Just go talk to him." Nat said to you. You leaned back on your chair and crossed your arms.

"Why are you reacting like that?" Bucky asked you, he lowered his voice because this didn't concern everyone else in the room.

"Because I don't want to argue again. I'm tired." You replied.

"Who said anything about arguing?"

"You did. You said we needed to talk. I know how our talks usually end." You sighed deeply.

"Okay, will you stop? I don't wanna argue with you either." You turned your head and looked at him as you considered his proposition.

"Fine." You replied. "But if it goes bad I'm joining everyone in the movie room." You said.

"I really doubt you're gonna join them." Bucky smirked.

 


	76. The "Talk"

After dinner you chilled with everyone a bit in the living space, it was still early for their movie anyway. Different groups of people were scattered around the room chatting about different things. You were with the girls near the bar having a drink and swaying to the music playing in the background. You were having a really great time with them, you knew you needed this before your big talk with your boyfriend tonight.

"Look at her, she's so doing it on purpose." Bucky didn't take off his eyes from you **once**. "I hate that it's working, whatever she's doing, whatever reaction she wants from me, it's all working." He said to Sam and Steve.

"You're in too deep." The falcon said to him.

"God, yeah I am. Look at her dancing, look at those hips- Wait, actually don't look." Bucky turned Sam's head away.

"Wow chill, I'm not gonna do anything man." Sam's brows furrowed.

"It's good to see [Y/N] like this though." Steve started. "I mean, she used to be very reserved. She looks like she's having fun."

"Yeah well, she should be having fun with **me**." Bucky said.

"You should give yourself some credit, I think it's because of you that she's changed." The captain added.

"Maybe Wanda did way more than erase that trauma from her mind." Bucky's eyes were still fixated on you.

"Are we even talking about the same things here?" The super soldier asked.

"Let him. He's far too gone." Sam put a hand on Steve's shoulder.

"What the fuck is she doing?" Bucky got up instantly. "I'll be back." He threw to his best friends before walking towards you. He grabbed your arm and pulled you away from the girls.

"What are you doing?" You asked Bucky as your brows furrowed.

"Close your legs." He said to you.

"I beg your pardon?" Your eyes widened.

"If I can see between your legs from that couch over there everyone else can." He explained to you.

"Leave me alone you weirdo." You said to him as you moved your arm to free it from his grip.

"Stop trying to piss me off or I'm gonna be mean."

"Oh, you try that shit." You said. "I can't believe you just threatened me with this."

"I'm not threatening you."

"What the hell do you want, Bucky?!" You finally liberated yourself from his grasp but you did it so fastly you spilled your drink on your top. You let out a long breath of frustration and annoyance.

"Alright, time for the movie y'all!" Tony warned everyone. He wasn't aware of what was happening between you and Bucky.

"One reason, Bucky. Give me one fucking reason to not go change right now and then join everyone instead of spending my night with you." You said in a not so friendly tone.

"I... bought you a gift." You stared at him baffled.

"W-" Your eyes were still widened. "What?" You asked again. At this point you were really not sure you heard right.

"I have many reasons actually but you said one and I thought this one would make you curious so... Yeah, I bought you a gift earlier when I was out with Sam and Steve." He said.

"Good evening on your side you guys." Nat said as she walked past you two with a grin.

"Please come." Bucky said to you. You rolled your eyes.

"Well, I gotta go in my room to change anyway." You raised one eyebrow. Bucky's lips curved into a small smile.

"Let's go." He handed you his arm.

"You're dreaming." You walked in front of him, totally ignoring his arm.

  
  


You departed when you arrived on your floor. Bucky said he'd be waiting for you in his room while you went to change in yours. You threw the stained top in the laundry basket and then wore a new white crop top this time. You knocked on his door and waited for him to open it.

"I'm surprised you actually came." He smiled slightly.

"I can still leave." You said.

"I know you doll, you want to know what your gift is." He chuckled in amusement when you blushed slightly in shame. "Take a seat." He gestured you his bed. You climbed on it and sat on the middle of his bed, you bent your legs to the side so your boots wouldn't touch his covers.

"So what did you get me this time?" You asked as you watched him take something from the drawer in his desk. You couldn't help it, you were getting a bit excited.

"Close your eyes." He asked you.

"Oh, come on-"

"Just do it." You rolled your eyes before closing them. Your lips curved into a small smile on their own. "Give your hand." He sat in front of you.

"You better not put anything scary in my palm." You warned him before raising your arm in front of you. You felt his flesh fingers softly close around your wrist and then you let out a little gasp when you felt something familiar. He left a kiss in your palm and it made your heart jump. Then you heard some metallic jingle and something cold around your wrist.

"Open your eyes." He said and you did. You looked at your wrist and there you found a silver bracelet and attached to it was a little red star.

"Oh my God." There we go. You started feeling bad for everything mean you said to him the longer you stared at the beautiful piece of jewelry. "Bucky, it's so pretty." You let out. "I-I can't accept it, I was so mean..." You said with a sad expression.

"Shh. I was mean first okay?" He said as he got closer to you. "I know you said you're tired of hearing me say I'm sorry so please accept it."

"Okay." You accepted with a small smile.

"Good." He smiled as well. "I also have this." Your brows furrowed in confusion as he put his hand behind him and then he put a box of chocolates in front of you.

"You got me chocolates?" You asked happily. "You're the best boyfriend in the world!" You leaned and wrapped your arms around his body.

"Please remember that the next time we fight." Bucky said and you giggled slightly. You felt him wrap his arms around your waist and then you brought your own arms around his neck before finally kissing him. You sucked on his lower lip and soothed the tingles with your tongue. "Don't you want to have one?" He asked you after breaking the kiss.

"Sure. Feed me." You asked him with a smirk. He looked at you as he grabbed the box and removed the plastic wrapper around it.

"Which one do you want?" Bucky asked you, the box contained different design and flavors of the treats.

"This one." You pointed to it with your finger. Your boyfriend picked the tiny chocolate and put it inside your mouth. "Hmm. Tastes so good." You said happily.

"You're so adorable." He couldn't help letting that out. You pointed to another one and when he almost reached your lips you gently seized his hand with yours. You catched the chocolate in your mouth but then you started licking Bucky's finger. His eyes widened as he watched you do. You sucked on his thumb and locked eyes with him. "Enough." He suddenly said and brought his hand to himself. "We need to talk."

"About what?" You asked with a side smirk.

"About you. About your behavior." He started taking off his jacket. "About what you've been doing to me since this morning, doll."

"What did I do?" You asked in a soft fake innocent voice. He took off his shoes and then he removed yours. You noticed him staring at your legs.

"So you were indeed doing it on purpose?" He grinned. "You're so evil."

"I have no idea what you're talking about." When he was done he grabbed you by your waist and laid you on his bed. Bucky climbed on top of you and laid between your legs. Your heart started beating faster, you were so excited. He leaned on you and catched your lips for a deep and hungry kiss. "Are you in the mood tonight?" You teased as he buried his head in the crook of your neck to attack it. "Ow!" He bit you before licking and sucking on your skin there to leave a mark. "B-Bucky..." You moaned softly as he grinded his hips against yours. You could feel his clothed bulge against your panties.

"You're soaked, doll." He grinned when his hand traced the shape of your pussy through your panties. He moved them to the side and when he accidentally touched your clit your hips jolted up. "Shh, calm down, you're fine. I got you." You gulped, you put your hands on his biceps and let him touch you. He circled your clit with his thumb and watched your reaction. You closed your eyes as you felt a blush creep on your cheeks.

"P-Please..." You pleaded him. He slowly inserted one finger inside of you and you gasped. He curled it before pushing a second one. You were so wet and turned on he had no problems inserting them inside of you. You spread your legs a little further. "Oh fuck..." Bucky went back to your neck to leave more hickeys as he fingered you, his thumb was still circling your clit.

"Can you hear the sounds you're making?" The winter soldier smirked. You were literally leaking and with each push of his fingers inside of you it started making splash noises. He decided to add a third finger since you were taking him so well. Bucky sat next to you on the bed and as his right hand was finger fucking you he decided to apply pressure on your lower stomach with his left hand. You literally saw stars when he curled his fingers inside you and reached your soft spot. You let out one last loud moan as you finally came. "God, you're so beautiful." He said before kissing you again.

"Take off your shirt." You breathed against his lips. Bucky obeyed you and removed his shirt then threw it somewhere on the floor. You ran your hands on his torso as you kissed. You felt his hands unbutton your skirt, he desperately wanted to see what you were hiding under. You let him do.

"Stand up, I want to see you." He whispered to you. You moved to the side until you reached the edge then you stood up on the floor. Bucky sat on the edge of the bed to properly undress you. He left kisses on your stomach as he unbuttoned your skirt and finally he could lower the piece of clothing down your legs. His eyes widened when he saw what type of lingerie you were wearing.

"Be careful with your next words." You warned him. You knew that if the same thing as last night happened again you would run to your room.

"Doll, you're so sexy." Bucky breathed. "You look so good..." He sounded sincere and it made you smile. He grabbed the hem of your crop top and lifted it so he could remove it from you. You brought your arms up and let him take it off. The winter soldier really liked the lace, it looked really good on your skin. You pushed your skirt and top away with your foot and then leaned on your boyfriend to kiss him again. As you kissed you kneeled in front of him. You broke the kiss to leave lovebites on his skin this time. Your fingers worked on his belt while you licked and sucked on his neck. You threw his belt away and then you unbuttoned his pants. Bucky lifted his hips so you could lower his pants, you took them off and then you palmed his bulge through his underwear. His breathing got funny for a bit but it quickly switched back to normal.

"I love you, Bucky." You said against his skin as you left kisses on his torso before grabbing the elastic of his underwear and pulling it down. His dick sprung free and stood proudly against his stomach. You leaned and left a kiss on the tip before opening your mouth and licking it to tease him.

"God, me too doll." He gently ran his hand through your hair as you kissed his body. You parted your lips and started sucking him. Bucky let out a satisfied hum as you bobbed your head up and down on his length. "Look at me, please." You raised your eyes and made eye contact with him as you sucked. He held your hair with his hands looked at your cute face. The sight alone could make him finish. You held onto his thighs for support and sucked him deeper. You could feel the tip brush against the back of your throat but it wasn't choking you so you were fine. Bucky was panting above you and his body started twitching, you could tell he was close. The deeper you sucked the longer he held your head on him. His palm pushed the back of your head against his crotch until without any warnings he came inside your mouth. You beared it for a little until he was done. "Oh God, I'm sorry-" You raised your hand to gesture it was fine. You got up and walked to your bathroom to wash your mouth, there was no way you were going to swallow that.

"I'm fine-" You said when you walked out but Bucky was waiting for you. He took you by the waist and pushed you against your bathroom door to kiss you deeply. You moaned against his lips as he ran his hands on your stomach and travelled up until he reached your chest. He grabbed your breasts through your bra and fondled them as he hungrily kissed your mouth.

"Get on the bed." He ordered next to your ear. "On your fours." He said when you climbed on it. You did as he said but kept your legs closed. Bucky came behind you and he started leaving kisses on your buttcheeks as he massaged them as well. Then he leaned back. "Remove your panties. Leave the rest on." He liked it, you looked really good with this new lingerie. You wanted to lay on your back to remove your underwear but he stopped you by holding your hips. "No, stay in this position." You started blushing.

"B-But Bucky... I-I feel so... exposed..." You let out. Something felt so embarrassing about the idea of having your butt raised up and naked to his view.

"Do it or I'm stopping here." Oh fuck. You really wanted to continue. You grabbed the hem of your panties and slowly lowered them. You didn't know it but you going slow just made the show more pleasant to the winter soldier. "So beautiful, you're gorgeous." He helped you remove your panties when they reached your mid thigh. He slipped them past your legs and threw them somewhere on the floor. "You only got yourself to blame. You shouldn't have tempted me like you did back then during dinner, doll." He smirked. "Spread your legs." He ordered you and you did. Bucky leaned to lick a long stripe between your slit and when he did a moan instantly escaped your lips. "You're so pretty." He commentated as he parted your lips with his fingers. You blushed in embarrassment, you knew he was talking to your pussy again. He brought his inder finger to your clit and gently rubbed it.

"Hnn- mmm!" You couldn't help moving your hips as he touched you. Bucky put his hands on your hips to keep you in place and then you felt his lips close around your clit. "Bucky!" You shouted before moaning loudly. He harshly sucked on your bundle of nerves then licked it fastly with his tongue to drive you crazy and damn, it did. You gripped his sheets between your fists and buried your head against the pillow as you moaned loudly of pleasure. Bucky lapped up all your juices, his nose, mouth and chin were glossy with your wetness but he didn't care. He loved your sweetness.

"You taste amazing." He said before licking another long stripe along your slit.

"Please Bucky..." You panted.

"What?" He asked.

"Put... Put it in." You let out. He smirked and then put a kiss on your right buttcheek before leaning back.

"Everything my babydoll wants." The winter soldier kneeled on the bed behind you then you felt him rub his dick tip between your folds. Bucky guided it to your entrance and slowly pushed in. You were so wet and ready it slipped in easily. You both let out a sigh of pleasure when your bodies connected. Bucky gripped your buttcheeks in his hands as he thrusted inside of you.

"Ahh fuck!" You moaned against the pillow.

"You're squeezing me so nicely, doll. You feel amazing." He wasted no time when he was inside of you, Bucky fucked you roughly and deeply to rub against your soft spots. His goal was clearly to make you come. "So soft and warm..."

"B-Bucky..! F-Fuck!" You started moving your hips as well, that tingle in your lower stomach felt so good.

"Say my name, doll. I want everyone to hear who's making you feel so good." He smirked before pushing your hips harder against his. "You feel good, right?" He whispered as he leaned on your back.

"Yes! P-Please don't stop!" You shouted. You didn't care about letting your voice out, you knew you were alone on this floor and unlike he said no one could hear you both at the moment. "Bucky!" The winter soldier kissed your back and your nape before he bit on your shoulder. He knew you loved that. He brought his hands under your body and caressed your waist and stomach until he brought them further up to grab your breasts. He pulled your bra up and then pinched your nipples between his fingers. He twisted and pulled on them until he had you begging under him. Bucky let go of one of your nipples to put his metallic hand between your legs. He started rubbing your clit as he kept fucking you, you felt overstimulated you thought you were going crazy.

"Haa, the way you're squeezing me right now doll..." He left a trail of kisses on your back. "Are you gonna come for me?" He asked.

"Hmm- yes!" You moaned. "Please go faster!" And he did. He leaned back and brought his hands back to your hips then he started pounding faster and deeper inside of you. You were pulling so hard on the pillow you were pretty sure you were going to rip it. "Bucky! Bucky!" You shouted one last time before your eyes rolled back and you saw all white. You came at the same time and then your body went limp. You heard Bucky groan behind you as he spilled inside of you then he pulled out and brought your hips down.

"Are you okay my love?" Your boyfriend asked you when he laid next to you. You were laying on your stomach but your head was turned towards him. You were both panting after your hard making love session. Bucky brought his fingers to your face and gently caressed your hair out of your face. Your eyes were closed as you tried to catch your breath back.

"Hmm...~" You hummed pleasantly against his lips when he kissed you lovingly.

"I'm so in love with you." He said to you with a smile.

"I love you too, Bucky." You said softly in a tired voice. You slowly reached for his hand and held it in yours as you tangled your fingers together.

 


	77. Always Yours

Bucky guided your hand to his lips and left a kiss inside your palm.

"God, I'm so glad to have you back." He smiled happily at you.

"I was always yours, you idiot." You smiled slightly. The winter soldier approached you and sticked his body against yours, he gently caressed your cheek as he stared into your eyes.

"I love you so much, I want to spend the rest of my life with you." You blushed instantly.

"W-Why are you saying stuff like that suddenly?" You were so embarrassed.

"Because it's the truth." He grinned. You rolled your eyes before staring at him as well. You couldn't help glancing at his lips.

"Tell me again." You said softly as you looked at him.

"I love you, doll." Your lips curved into a small smile.

"Me too, Bucky." You replied. "I-I hate fighting with you." You admitted. "I prefer when you hold me, when you kiss me, when you say sweet things to me." You said.

"I want to promise you that we'll never fight again but I'm afraid of not keeping that promise." He said. "Though I can promise you that I hate it as well because the last thing I want is to see you hurt. You're the best thing that's happened to me since I woke up." Bucky smiled slightly. "If I had known that you'd become so important to me when I met you in that kitchen the first time-" He chuckled.

"What did you think about me back then?" You asked.

"I told Steve you seemed... uncomfortable." He hesitated to tell you, he didn't want to hurt your feelings again but he relaxed when you giggled slightly.

"Yeah, I was." You said.

"I thought it was because of me but Steve said you were just shy. Apparently you looked confident when you showed them your power."

"Like I told you before it wasn't you, really. Steve suggested eating with you, a total stranger back then and it just caught me off guard. I was starving but you know how I was, I couldn't." You explained.

"I'm proud of the person you became." Bucky said to you and it brought small tears to your eyes. "Aw, don't cry babydoll." He chuckled slightly before hugging you against him.

"I-It's thanks to you." You hugged him back. "Y-You were right when you said that maybe it'd change the view I have on myself if you complimented me everyday to replace the mean things people used to say to me. I-It worked."

"Then I'm the happiest I could help. You only deserve good things [Y/N]." The winter soldier left a kiss on your shoulder. "What did you think when you saw me?" He asked you after you released each other.

"I-I... I was intimidated. I had heard about who you were and what you've supposedly done but I knew you were innocent. You guys are always on the news and to be really honest I only listen to like 50% of it, I know not everything the press says is true. I know that it wasn't you who attacked and killed the king of Wakanda. The same news channel who blames you for something suddenly clears you the day after. And I think you know me enough to know I don't judge people based on what I hear about them or whatever they've done in the past. To me everyone deserves a second chance."

"Look at you, you're so wise. You really are a Goddess." He smiled.

"Oh c'mon." You giggled slightly. Bucky caressed your hair and then leaned to kiss your forehead. It really moved his heart what you've said to him just now. "But you know, you catched my eye back then in the kitchen."

"Really now?" Bucky raised one eyebrow.

"Hmm." You nodded. "Before I exited the room with Tony I quickly glanced at you. I don't know what I was expecting or anything but yeah I don't know, I felt like there was something about you." You said. "And sometimes I keep thinking about it. Like was it a coincidence that out of all the people in the tower it was you who found me in the kitchen?"

"I think it helped that we lived in the same floor, I thought something was weird when after hearing your door open and close you stayed still for no reason in front of my door." You blushed slightly as he chuckled.

"When you saw me in the kitchen I was so afraid you'd tell everybody the next morning you found the fat trainee stealing food." You giggled slightly.

"As long as you wouldn't touch my favorite yogurts I wouldn't have cared if you actually stole or not." He laughed with you.

"I love you so much Bucky." You wrapped one arm around his neck and then leaned to kiss him deeply.

"Me too babydoll." He ran his tongue on your lower lip asking for permission to enter. You parted your lips and then your tongues met inside your mouth. You shivered as Bucky rubbed his hand on your side and then went behind your back to unclasp your bra. You giggled slightly against his lips as he struggled.

"Bucky, the opening is on the front." You smiled in amusement as you pointed to the clasp between your breasts. He lowered his head and chuckled. "But if you wanna go for round 2 you have to bring me something to drink first." You said to him.

"I'll be right back." He winked at you before leaving a quick kiss on your lips.

"Bucky, wear something!" Your eyes widened when he grabbed the door handle bare naked. The winter soldier picked up his underwear and put them on. "T-That's it?" You asked.

"I'll be quick, they're all watching their movie anyway." You sighed and let him leave the bedroom in his boxers.

  
  


"Oh shit." Bucky let out when he walked into the kitchen and found team cap having a drink.

"Jesus Christ." Steve raised his eyes to the sky when he saw his best friend walk in almost naked.

"I should've listened to her." Bucky muttered.

"Well, well, well, what do we have here?" Sam joked.

"Good talk huh? Based on the hickeys on your neck." Nat threw with a grin before taking a sip of her drink.

"Weren't you guys supposed to watch a movie?" The winter soldier asked them.

"What time do you think it is, Bucky?" The redhaired woman asked him.

"I don't know, 9?" He replied.

"It's 11." Sam said.

"What?" Bucky raised one eyebrow and then he grinned.

"Well, we're guessing that you two are good again?" The falcon asked.

"She loved the gift." He replied happily.

"What? What gift?" Nat asked.

"We dropped by the jewelry store after our drink and Bucky bought [Y/N] something." Sam explained to her. The redhaired woman raised one eyebrow.

"Smart." She commentated. "I'm guessing you liked her show during dinner as well."

"I knew you were behind that." Bucky replied. "Stop tainting my doll, she's already perfect as she is."

"Hey, I'm working for you." Nat said with a smirk.

"So anyway, what were you doing here naked?" Steve asked him.

"Oh right, almost forget her drink." Bucky opened the fridge and grabbed a water bottle. "We're gonna go for another roun-"

"I-" The captain pinched the bridge of his nose. "-really regret asking." The winter soldier closed the fridge as he chuckled.

"Have fun." Nat smirked before Bucky left the kitchen.

"Oh, you can count on that." He threw as he walked out.

"I can't believe him." Sam said. "I don't know what [Y/N] did to him but she got him good."

  
  


"What took you so long?" You asked your boyfriend when he came back.

"There uh... There were people in the kitchen." Your eyes widened.

"Oh my God." You passed your hands on your face.

"It's fine doll, it was just our friends." He explained.

"Everyone in this tower is my friend, Bucky!" You said. "W-Who?"

"Steve, Sam and Natasha." He replied.

"O-Okay... Well, i-it can't get anymore embarrassing with Steve and Nat, can it?" You asked as your brows furrowed.

"What do you mean?" Bucky asked.

"Well, Steve catched us once but... Nat did as well..." You let out.

"What? When?"

"Remember when we tricked the others and I pretended to faint?" He nodded. "Well uh... We were so good that Nat wanted to check on me..."

"Okay and?" He asked.

"You were doing me against the door and she was in the hallway. it's Nat. She's smart." You let out. Bucky let out a laugh and your eyes widened. "Oh my God, there's nothing funny Bucky. It's very embarrassing."

"They're adults, don't you think they all know what we're doing when we're together?"

"D-Doesn't mean we have to make it obvious!"

"How are you gonna explain our hickeys to everyone tomorrow?" He grinned. You sighed deeply as you let your head hit the pillow. "I promise you no one cares, doll." He took your hand and made you sit again. "Drink, I really wanna do you again." You blushed instantly but took the water bottle anyway. "You should have some sugar as well." He added after you took a few sips.

"Feed me one of these chocolates again." You said.

"Come get it then." Bucky smirked. He took one from the box that rested on the nightstand and put it between his teeth. You bit onto your lower lip as you looked at him with a smile before wrapping your arms around his beefy body. You catched the chocolate in his mouth with yours and then kissed deeply as you ate it. "Hmm, very sweet." He said with a smile against your lips.

"Continue from where we left off." You said to him as you grabbed his hand and put it on your bra. This time he unclasped it correctly at the front. While you were getting rid of it Bucky catched one of your nipples in his mouth and sucked on it earning a soft mewl from you. He threw the piece of clothing away when you were done with it and then laid your back on the mattress. "Ow!" You let out when he bit your breast on the side but then you started giggling as he soothed the pain with his tongue. "Y-You're tickling me."

"Really?" He raised one eyebrow as he smirked.

"Oh no Bucky, you're not-" He slided between your legs and kneeled in front of you. "Bucky, plea- pfft hahaha!" The winter soldier brought his hands to your sides and started tickling you. You cried of laughter as you squirmed under his body trying to escape him. He tickled your waist, your armpits, your thighs until you were literally out of breath. Finally he stopped and held you tightly against him.

"I love hearing you laugh. Ugh doll, the things you do to me..." You were panting under him as you caressed his hair with a smile on your face. Bucky could hear your heart beat fast. "But what I love hearing the most is the sounds you make when I touch you." His hand had crept between your legs and without any warning whatsoever he slided his fingers between your folds.

"Hhh!" You gasped. Bucky leaned on your torso and left kisses on your breasts as he rubbed you between your legs.

"Give me one of these chocolates, I wanna try something." Your brows furrowed in confusion but you did as he said anyway. He catched it with his free hand and then he spread it on your nipples, your body temperature made the chocolate melt.

"Oh my God, what are you doin- hnng!" His mouth closed on one of your fleshbuds to lick the chocolate away. "B-Bucky..." You moaned. While he teased your breasts he kept rubbing your clit. You shivered as he touched you and it made your nipples erect. Bucky started biting one of them, not enough for it to be painful but enough for you to feel it was teeth. You closed your eyes as you moaned, your face was as red as a beet, you loved everything he was doing to you.

"Doll, you're so hot." He breathed against your skin between two kisses. You caressed his cheek as you smiled at him.

"Make love to me." You asked him softly. Bucky took your hand that was against his cheek to put a kiss inside your palm as he locked eyes with you. As always you felt your heart jump. Bucky put his hands under your knees and then spread your legs.

"You're so beautiful." He grinned as he stared down. You giggled slightly, he made you laugh. Bucky kneeled to put a quick kiss just above the hood of your clit then he grabbed his dick with his hand to guide it towards your entrance.

"Ooooh... fuck..." You cursed as he gradually pushed himself inside of you.

"So tight..." Bucky let out as he towered above you. "You feel so fucking amazing, doll." You put your hands on his biceps when he pushed his fists on each side of your body against the mattress to support his weight above you.

"Please start moving." You pleaded him.

"Everything my babydoll wants." The winter soldier grinned before rolling his hips against yours. You gasped of pleasure when he did. You caressed his arms as he thrusted inside of you. Bucky leaned on you and buried his head in the crook of your neck to leave more hickeys on your skin there in case you still had a clean spot.

"Bucky..." You wrapped one arm around his neck and then left kisses on his flesh shoulder.

"I got you doll, I'm right here." He gripped your waist and thrusted his hips harder against yours. You closed your eyes as you moaned louder. Everything he did felt so fucking good, the way he thrusted inside you, the way he touched you, even his sounds made you more excited.

"Please, please..!" Your voice died in your throat when Bucky catched your lips with his to kiss you passionately.

"Touch me, doll." He breathed against your mouth. You ran your hands on his warm torso, you felt his muscles contract under your touch and then you slowly crept one of your hands behind his head to pull his hair. Bucky groaned against the kiss but judging by the way he picked up his pace with his hips you could tell he didn't hate it at all.

"Oh my God, Bucky!" You moaned louder. "Keep going, please!" Bucky's brows furrowed as he started pounding harder and deeper inside of you. You wrapped your arms under his and clinged on him as if he was a lifesaver and you were about to drown. "Tell me, please!" He knew what you wanted to hear.

"I love you doll-" He panted. "I love you so much." You smiled of happiness but quickly your expression changed into lost pleasure as he hit a precise soft spot inside of you.

"B-Bucky! I'm gonna..! Aaaah!" You wrapped all your limbs around his body as you finally came. Your entire body trembled against his while you had your orgasm. Bucky hid his face in the crook of your neck and then you heard him groan as he came as well shortly after you. When his hips stopped thrusting against yours you gently put your hands against each side of his head and then you guided him to your level to share a kiss. "I love you so much too." You nuzzled his nose with yours as you smiled.

 


	78. "I Just Had Sex"

The following morning when you woke up you found Bucky staring at you with heart eyes.

"Did you take another picture of me?" You asked and he chuckled slightly. You blushed as you smiled when he leaned on your face and put a soft kiss on your nose.

"Good morning, my love." Bucky smiled at you. You wrapped your arms around his neck and hugged him tightly against you.

"Good morning, Bucky." You replied back happily. "Hnn- no, hold me against you." You whined when he tried to release you from his arms. He chuckled lowly as he re squeezed you against his body.

"Did you sleep well?" He asked.

"Hmm." You nodded. "Never better." you replied truthfully. "You?"

"I always sleep well when I'm holding you." He said before putting a kiss on your shoulder.

"I love you so much, Bucky." You said against his neck.

"My beautiful doll-" He gently caressed your hair and your back. "I love you so much too." He smiled before finally releasing you. You couldn't stay there forever.

"Ugh, I don't wanna get up. I feel good here." You hugged the winter soldier from behind when he turned around and sat on the edge of the bed. "Ow..."

"What's wrong?" He worried. Bucky turned his head to look at you.

"I... I-I just feel really sore..." You blushed slightly.

"Where are you aching?" He asked with a small smile.

"My hips, my legs... Everywhere down, I feel like after my surgery..." You let out after you laid back on the bed. "I-I don't regret it though... Yesterday was amazing." Your face turned a deeper shade of red.

"I loved it too." Bucky grinned and leaned on you to put a kiss on your forehead. "Show me your thighs."

"Go ahead." You said. He moved the blanket off you and checked your legs. You had small bruises but nothing alarming.

"You'll be okay, babydoll. I wanna massage you but I'm afraid of making it worse." He said.

"Don't worry, it's fine. I'll get up in a few." You said.

"Alright. Well, I'll go take a shower first." He put a kiss on your forehead and then got up. Your brows furrowed slightly in confusion.

"I think that's the first time you're not asking me to join you." You said.

"After the night you made me spend I don't think I can be happier." Bucky smiled and it made you blush. "And you're right. You said you wanted to make it special, I thought about it and I think I want that too."

"Alright." You smiled. "I can't wait." You teased. He winked at you before closing the bathroom door. You tried moving your legs to make them less sore but it just hurt. You had to get up though. If you stayed in bed people in the tower would know it was because of all the sex you had in the night.

You sat on the edge of the bed and tried getting up when your feet met the floor. Your legs wobbled and your thighs hurt but hey, at least you were standing. Well, kind of. You were bending over and your legs were spread. You took a few steps around the room until finally you were in a somewhat normal position.

You decided to leave Bucky's room and go into yours to shower and change. You picked up your clothes from last night. You put on the skirt and the top to not walk naked in the hallway and when you reached your room you threw everything in the laundry basket. You weren't worried about Bucky not finding you in his room. It was obvious he was gonna guess you went to yours to prepare yourself before going downstairs for breakfast.

"Oh my God..." Your eyes widened when you stared at your body in front of the mirror in the bathroom. You had so many hickeys and bite marks on your skin. When you looked at Bucky earlier he had some as well but it was like four times less than you did. You were pretty sure he did it on purpose, he always loved marking you even when you weren't even together yet. That was going to be hard to hide and explain.

You hopped in the shower and when the warm water hit your skin it relaxed you and soothed your sore body, it felt good. You washed yourself and at each part of yourself that you scrubbed you rememberd what Bucky did to you. You closed your eyes and let the water run on your head as you thought of the winter soldier with a smile on your face.

Finally you got out and you started drying your hair with a hair dryer after you wrapped a towel around your body. Then you brushed your teeth and when you were done you stepped out of the bathroom and walked towards your closet to pick your clothes.

"AH!" You gasped loudly in terror when you felt arms wrap around your stomach from behind. "Bucky, you scared the daylights out of me!" You let out when you heard him laugh behind you. "For how long have you been hiding?"

"Don't know, around 10 minutes." Your eyes widened.

"You could've manifested your presence." You rolled your eyes. Bucky left a kiss on your nape.

"How are your legs?" He whispered next to your ear as he started fondling your butt from behind.

"Better thanks to the warm water." You said as you slightly slapped his hands away. You bent over to pick your underwear to wear for the day in one of the drawers of your closet and you felt Bucky's hand creep back between your legs. "Hnn- Bucky, no. We gotta go downstairs and I'm hungry." You said as you stood back up.

"Me too but it's you I wanna eat right now." He smirked.

"Come on, wait until tonight at least." You said.

"What? That's in so long!" He complained and sat on the edge of your bed.

"Alright, if you're nice maybe earlier." You smiled slightly.

"Am I not always nice?" Bucky raised one eyebrow.

"I'm... not even gonna answer that." You chuckled lowly. You put on the underwear that you picked and then picked up a pair of jeans.

"Why do you only wear skirts when you're mad at me? Why can't you wear one today?" He asked.

"Have you not seen the bruises on my legs, Bucky?" You asked as you turned around to show him. "I'm not gonna give more reasons for people to tease me today."

"Fine. Don't wear those though, put on the high waisted ones." He smirked. "Do you know how hard it was to be mad at you during the bowling game when I had to look at your butt in those?" He asked as you pulled out from the closet the jeans you wore on that night.

"I'm surprised, you hid it really well. I was convinced I was annoying you the whole time." You said as you dressed yourself.

"You're never annoying me." You rolled your eyes and then smiled. When you finished putting on your top you climbed on him on the bed and straddled his thighs.

"I love you, Bucky." You sticked your torso against his and wrapped your arms around his neck before leaning on his face to kiss him passionately.

"Hmmm-" The winter soldier hummed pleasantly against your lips as you kissed. His hands went under your top and he gently caressed your naked skin there. You shivered under his touch, he was being so delicate and soft, you loved it.

"Oh my God, Bucky. Do something about it." You broke the kiss and glanced down. You could feel his hard bulge between your legs.

"Stop moving so much on it then." He said as he stared at your lips. You smirked slightly as you decided to tease him. You harshly grinded your hips against his and he let out an accidental moan. "Oh, you're fucking getting it." You giggled as he wrapped his arms around your waist and inversed your positions.

"Bucky, we don't have time-" You were still laughing as he quickly unbuttoned your pants.

"I don't care." He pulled down your jeans and your panties in one swift motion. "Plus you say this but look at you-" He lightly slapped your pussy with his palm and made you gasp. "You're already wet, doll." Bucky held your legs up against his torso and then he quickly lowered his own pants and underwear until finally you felt him rub his tip against your entrance.

"F-Fine-" You breathed. "But please, just don't... bruise me more." You pleaded him.

"I'll be as soft as I can, babydoll." The winter soldier left a trail of kisses on one of your legs as he slowly pushed his length inside of you.

"Hhhh... Oh, God..." You moaned quietly.

"I'll never get tired of this... of you..." He started slowly thrusting inside of you. "You feel amazing-"

"Bucky..." You closed your eyes as you focused on what you felt. "O-Oh, God..! What are you doing..?"

"Do you like it?" Bucky kept your legs up as he started slowly doing circular motions with his hips. It felt fucking amazing.

"D-Doesn't feel bad..." You let out. "Y-You can keep going." He smiled and then put his hands on your hips before leaning forward to enter you deeper.

"You love what I do to you?" He asked.

"I love everything you do to me." You breathed. Bucky left more kisses on your legs as he kept thrusting.

"You're so beautiful-" He panted as he picked up his pace.

"Hhhh- Bucky!" You moaned loudly. The winter soldier brought his hand between your legs and started flicking your clit with his thumb.

"I'm close babydoll and there's-" He thrusted harshly inside of you. "-no" Again. "-way" And again. "-I'm leaving you unsatisfied."

"Keep going, keep going!" You begged him. He wrapped his arms around your thighs and then started pounding very fast inside of you. You covered your mouth with your hands as you literally screamed of pleasure until finally the knot in your abdomen broke and you came. Bucky came as well and after he catched his breath he pulled out of you.

"Wait here." He said to you before going to your bathroom. You panted on your bed, you heard the water run and you guessed he was cleaning himself. A few minutes later your boyfriend came back with a wet washcloth that he passed on your parts to clean you.

"Hhh-" Your brows furrowed slightly.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"I-I'm- It's still sensitive..." You blushed. Bucky leaned and put a kiss on your thigh as he smiled. "God, I can feel it. I-I'm gonna be sore again..." You whined.

"I'll carry you wherever you have to go, babydoll." He promised you. "I think we have a training session planned this morning but it's not like you have to attend."

"I'll come." You said. "I want to see you." Your lips curved into a small smile. Bucky leaned on you to kiss you then he picked up your clothes to put them on you again. "Oh, knew it-" You said as the winter soldier helped you into a sitting position. "I'm sore again."

  
  


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Oh God, everyone was around the table. You entered the kitchen and lowered your head, you felt like "I just had sex!" was written on your forehead. You were feeling so ashamed.

"Good morning!" Bucky threw happily to the audience. Why did you always feel like he was doing things on purpose to annoy you?

"Hey..." You muttered behind him. You could forget your discreet arrival now.

"You're late." Tony said.

"Sorry-" You quickly pulled a chair and sat on it.

"Good morning, [Y/N]." Steve said to you. Thanks God you could always count on the captain.

"Someone looks like he spent a good night..." Nat nudged Sam and they started snickering together. Steve glared at them and they stopped.

"I did." Bucky replied proudly.

"Can't say the same for [Y/N] though..." Thor's brows furrowed as he glanced at you.

"Oh trust me, she did-" The winter soldier added and you turned to look at him before slightly hitting him on the stomach.

"H-How was your movie?" You asked to the others to change subject.

"It was good." Steve came at your rescue.

"Yeah, it was funny." Wanda added as well.

"I'm guessing your night was good as well since you didn't join us." Nat smirked. Bucky looked at you waiting for your answer.

"I-It was." You replied truthfully. The winter soldier leaned on you and put a kiss on your cheek instantly making you blush. You smiled slightly as you glanced at him.

The others were already almost done with their breakfast while you and Bucky filled your plates.

"You didn't forget we have a training session this morning, right?" The captain asked his best friend.

"Nope." Bucky replied.

"Can- Can I come as well?" You asked Steve. "Promise you I'll just sit in the corner and keep quiet."

"I'm not worried about you [Y/N], I'm worried about him-" He pointed to your boyfriend. "Being distracted by your presence."

"Okay..." You let out sadly as you lowered your head. Steve raised his eyes to the sky.

"… I guess we could use your help if one of us indeed gets distracted and hurt." He looked at you with a little smile. "You can come."

"Yay!" You let out happily. "Thanks, Steve!" Bucky gently grabbed your hand next to you and brought it to his lips.

"You're so adorable." He said with a big dumb smile on his face as he looked at you. Your heart beat faster and you couldn't help your lips curving into a smile as well.

"Do you want another toast, Bucky? Ah wait, there's no more on the table. I'm gonna make a few." You got up and put a kiss on his head before going behind the counter to put a few pieces of bread in the toaster machine. "While I'm at it, anybody else wants some toasts as well?" You asked the Avengers around the table.

"We're good, thank you." They replied. You glanced at the table and noticed the coffee was empty as well. You walked towards your boyfriend while your toasts were getting toasted and took his mug.

"I'll refill that for you." You smiled at him before going back behind the counter. Bucky simply looked at you. He was surprised but it wasn't unpleasant to be taken care of.

"What did you do to her?" Nat asked him with a low voice so you couldn't hear behind your counter. The winter soldier shrugged as he smiled smugly. Five minutes later you came back with Bucky's mug and toasts.

"Be careful, it's hot." You said after putting everything on the table in front of him. You grabbed one of his toasts and started spreading butter on it for him.

"[Y/N], I'm sure he can eat on his own." Nat said to you.

"Doesn't mean I can't help." You replied. You brought the toast to his mouth and Bucky took a bite out of it. You smiled at him as he chewed.

"What is going on here?" Tony broke the silence after everyone was looking at you serve the winter soldier.

"What?" You turned your head and looked at him completely clueless.

"Nothing [Y/N], don't worry." Steve gestured everyone discreetly to let you be.

"Why are you doing all of this for me?" Bucky finally asked you. "Not that I hate it, absolutely not- but I'm just wondering."

"Um, well first of all I love you-" You smiled at him. "And second you got training, you need nutrients and energy." You approached your chair closer to his.

"Is that it?" He asked as his brows furrowed a little in confusion.

"Hmm." You nodded. "Come on, eat up." You brought the toast to his mouth again.

"You should eat as well. I mean you did spend a lot of energy last night-" You shoved the toast in his mouth and lowered your head as you blushed instantly. Bucky grabbed your legs and laid them on his lap as he chuckled.

"You just never stop, huh?" You rolled your eyes before smiling slightly. "Finish your breakfast, we have to go soon."

 


	79. You Saved Me

Forty minutes after breakfast you went into the training area with team cap and Thor joined as well. He was always down for a fight.

"Good luck, Bucky." You kissed him quickly on the lips and then you made your way towards the bench. You turned around and smiled at your boyfriend as he watched you go.

"Stop drooling, man." Sam said to Bucky as he kept looking at you with a big smile on his face.

"I got the best girl in the universe." He said before finally taking his eyes off you.

"Focus." Steve said.

"Sharon, you sparring with me?" Nat asked the blonde woman.

"Sure." Replied the female agent.

"C'mon, with me Bucky." The falcon said to the winter soldier. And then Steve paired with Thor to train.

You watched them fight, run, jump, even fly for some of the members and you couldn't help being anxious. You didn't know if it was a good idea to be here. You somehow had a bad memory with the place. You couldn't help remembering Bucky and Loki fighting. You shaked your head and tried to focus on what was going on in front of you.

You really admired Nat and Sharon's fighting skills, they were so fast, swift and sharp. All their movements were precisely calculated. You could tell they weren't holding back their punches and kicks and yet they didn't land on each other once. They were really skilled.

The boys were more rough. Unlike the girls they were really going at it and hitting each other. You started worrying and you wondered if they were so confident at taking each other's hits because they knew that no matter how badly they'd injure themselves they'd have you to heal them. You let out a gasp and covered your eyes with your hands when Sam grabbed Bucky and flew around with him before dropping him on the ground. You didn't see the landing, you were really afraid he was going to break a bone.

"He's fine, don't worry." Someone said next to you.

"Oh my God, I didn't even hear you both." Wanda and Vision had came next to you. "I-I don't think it was a good idea for me to come."

"You're really pale, are you sure you're alright?" Vision asked you.

"Yeah, yeah." You brushed off and then you reported your attention back to what was happening in front of you. "AH!" You pushed your palm against your mouth as you blushed of embarrassment because of the new shriek you just let out. Wanda and Vision chuckled discreetly of amusement next to you.

"You two joining us?" Steve asked them. Your cry made everyone turn their heads towards the bench you were on but then they noticed Wanda and Vision.

"Sure." The scarlet witch replied. Bucky waved at you while they were talking and you waved back with a small smile on your face.

"Alright. Like we practiced last time." Steve announced to everyone.

You tried to focus on the other members instead of Bucky since he was making you so anxious running around, jumping and avoiding hits. You were on the edge of your seat, you were sure that this was the last time you'd come to see him during training.

"Oh my God." You let out when you saw Wanda suddenly start flying with her powers. She seemed so powerful and she probably was. Red lights were emetting from her hands and her eyes turned red as well. She was glowing. Your gaze was fixed to the ceiling of the immense training room since you were looking at her so you didn't see what was happening on the ground...

"WATCH OUT!" Someone shouted and brought you out of your trance. You looked in front of you and suddenly you saw Captain America's shield fly and it was coming towards your face. You couldn't move, you were paralyzed before you realized what was happening. You closed your eyes and put your hands in front of you in reflex, ready for impact...

_**Cling!** _

There was silence but nothing hit you. You felt a small wind of air slightly brush your face and you smelled something familiar. You opened your eyes after a few seconds where nothing happened. The shield should've hit you by now.

"I told you I won't let anything or anyone hurt you anymore." Bucky was right in front of your face and he had catched the shield with his metal hand. He turned around to throw it back to Steve and when he faced you again you jumped on him. You wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him deeply.

"You... You saved me." You breathed against his lips as you stared into his eyes.

"You saved me first when you came into this tower." He grinned.

"I'm in love with you, Bucky." You closed your eyes and kissed him passionately again.

"Alright, everyone take 5." Steve raised his eyes to the sky and put his hands on his hips.

"You're the love of my life, doll." Bucky sat next to you on the bench and then you kept kissing until someone coughed next to you to interrupt voluntarily. The winter soldier sighed deeply after you broke the kiss. "Yes?" He raised his eyes to look at the person who bothered him.

"Get a room." Sam joked. You giggled slightly as you wrapped your arms around Bucky's waist and hugged him tightly.

"Get lost." Your boyfriend replied to him.

"It's fine, you have to go back anyway." You said to him.

"You're much more important than training." He said and you bit onto your lower lip before leaning on his ear to say something to him.

"You've got a few bruises, after training maybe you could come into my room for a private healing session?" You whispered to Bucky and then you kissed his cheek. He looked into your eyes with a smirk. Oh, you could really tell he was excited.

"You really have no idea what you do to me, huh?" The winter soldier leaned on you to kiss again, except this time he pulled on your lower lip to tease you. Your heart beat fast and then you felt butterflies flutter in your stomach as he kissed you normally.

"Buck." Steve called him. The break was over.

"Go." You said softly to him when you broke the kiss. Bucky left a kiss on your lips and forehead before finally getting up and joining everyone else again.

"Look at him grinning like an idiot." Sam teased while speaking to Nat.

"I'm just the happiest man alive." He said to them.

They fought some more in teams before they all kinda separated and started doing trainings on their own.

"Come with me." Bucky said to you. You got up from your bench and took his hand. You walked through a hallway and then entered a new room in the training area.

"What are we doing here?" You asked.

"It's the shooting range. I thought maybe you'd want to try? Under my supervision, of course." He replied.

"Oh..." You let out and then you started looking around you. You noticed some weapons exposed behind cabinets and the targets displayed in front of you. "I-I don't know... Seems a bit dangerous." You said.

"I promise you no one will get hurt, doll." You looked at him as you hesitated before sighing in resignation.

"I just can't say no to you, can I?" You smiled slightly. "Fine." Bucky came closer to you and put a kiss on your forehead.

"Alright, wait here. I'll go get what you need." He said before walking away. You fidgeted on your spot, you were a bit nervous. Two minutes later he came back with a bunch of stuff. He started explaining to you how it will go and then he gently placed a pair of earmuffs on your head.

"Oh, never expected them to be so heavy." You said when you took the gun he handed you.

"Now, come here." He turned your body towards the target so you faced forward and then he stood closely behind you. "Spread your legs a bit, put your arms like that-" You bit onto your lower lip as he ran his hands on your body to place you correctly. "Hold it firmly, it's pretty powerful. It's not like in the movies where you can just shoot with one hand. Also it's gonna be loud so prepare to be surprised but don't worry doll, I'm right here." He smiled at you when you turned your head and looked at him. Bucky placed his hands on your waist and held you in place in case you'd lose your balance. "Whenever you're ready, aim and pull the trigger."

"Okay-" You took a deep breath and then exhaled, your brows furrowed as you aimed and then you shooted. "AH!" Even though you were wearing ear protection it was still very loud and then you felt the gun jump between your hands. You placed it on the counter in front of you and took a step back.

"You okay?" Bucky asked you after he removed your earmuffs off your head.

"L-Listen... I love you and I'll always support you in whatever that you do but... I-I don't think this is for me." You let out.

"Babydoll, you're fine. It's alright." The winter soldier smiled in amusement. He found you so adorable. "Though I think it's a loss for the Avengers, you got it right in the middle." He said as he looked at your target.

"I-I don't know how you or the others can do it. It's so scary." You said.

"Hey-" He placed his hands on your cheeks. "You'll never touch a gun again if you don't want to. You let me handle them and you, you can continue looking pretty and loving me." He smiled in reassurance.

"I love you, Bucky." You wrapped your arms around his body and hugged him tightly.

"I love you too, babydoll. Don't worry, this wasn't an audition. I just needed an excuse to spend time with you." Bucky leaned and catched your lips with his for a kiss.

"Mmm~" You hummed pleasantly against his mouth.

"You're okay, right?" He's the one who started worrying now. "I hope I didn't scare you or something, did I?"

"D-Don't worry, I'm fine. I-It just really surprised me. I guess I just never realized how scary these weapons are." You placed your head against Bucky's chest. "But please don't feel guilty or anything, I appreciated you wanting to share this, a part of your job, with me." You said.

"Tell me you love me." He asked.

"I do. I love you so so much, Bucky." You smiled as you raised your head and looked into his eyes. "I love you to... to infinity. I love you like I-I never loved before. There's literally no one else, nothing else. It's just you and it's so much." You smiled emotionally at him. "I-I... didn't say it back yesterday but... I want to spend the rest of my life with you too." Small tears appeard in the corner of your eyes. "I love- mmm!" Bucky interrupted you as he crashed his lips against yours. He kissed you so deeply and passionately your legs turned into jelly. You gripped him tightly against you as you kissed. You didn't want to let go. Bucky lowered himself a bit so he could reach your legs with his hands.

"Jump on me." He breathed against your mouth and so you did. When you jumped he grabbed the back of your knees and brought you against him. You wrapped your legs around his waist as he carried you towards the wall. He pushed your back against it as you kissed. He explored the inside of your mouth with his tongue until he found yours and they fought for dominance. His kisses made you feverish. You didn't want to be anywhere but here.

"Bucky..." You moaned quietly.

"Ughh, don't say my name like that doll." He groaned of frustration. "I want to take you so badly. Right here, right now-" He grabbed the hem of your shirt with one hand and lifted it so he could kiss your cleavage. His other hand rested under your butt to support you against him.

"W-We can't, the others are right next to us..." You said.

"Then why are you grinding your hips against mine?"

"I'm not doing anything, you're the one moving Bucky..." You giggled slightly.

"… Yeah, I think I saw them head here-" Oh fuck, someone was coming.

"Buck, let me go!" You ordered him instantly and he backed up from the wall so you could stand on your feet. You lowered your shirt and passed a hand through your hair while Bucky put his hands in front of him trying to hide the obvious dent in his pants.

"You should stand... in front of me." He said. You turned around to look at him and then you lowered your gaze on his hands and your eyes widened.

"Oh my God..." You approached your boyfriend and stood right in front of him.

"Oh, you guys are here." Wanda said to you both.

"We are!" You smiled to try to be natural but it just seemed forced.

"What were you doing?" She asked.

"Bucky was showing me how to shoot with a gun. It's not my thing." You brushed off.

"Alright, well anyway. Steve wanted me to get you both." She said.

"We got it. Just let us clean after ourselves." You blushed instantly. "I-I mean, we took a few of the equipment. Put everything back to its place I meant." You said a bit quickly.

"Alright..." Oh God, you really hoped you fooled her. "See you in a minute." She said before walking away.

"What are you grinning for?" You asked Bucky.

"You're just so adorable."

"You should get rid of that... thing-" You said as you lowered your gaze on his crotch. "While I put everything away."

  
  


\---

  
  


Training ended lately so after it the Avengers members departed to shower and change clothes then you all rejoined in the kitchen. You and Bucky didn't have time to enjoy that private healing session since it was time for lunch already. You were in the kitchen with Bruce and Tony when everyone entered the room.

"[Y/N] told me you almost beheaded her!" Tony said to them.

"That's not what I said!" You immediately let out.

"It did almost happen though." Nat said as she took a seat around the table.

"Thankfully Bucky was quick enough to not let it happen." Sam added. Speaking about the winter soldier he took a seat as well and sat next to you of course.

"You smell good." You whispered to him as you leaned on his body. He put his metal hand under your chair and brought you closer to him.

"What's to eat, I'm starving." Thor announced.

"I don't even care, I just wanna eat you." Bucky said discreetly to you, you blushed slightly as you smiled.

"Say..." You started.

"Hm?" You had his attention.

"Are you doing something this afternoon?"

"Besides you, you mean?" He smirked.

"Bucky! Oh my God..." You lightly slapped his bicep as he chuckled.

"What do you have in mind?" He asked seriously this time.

"I thought... we could go out? I don't know, take a walk in a park or something. I want to spend my afternoon outside with you." You said to him as you lowered your gaze and twiddled with the hem of his shirt.

"I'll take you outside if that's what you want." Bucky replied with a smile as he looked at your face.

"Really?" You brought your gaze up. "You're not busy?"

"I'm never busy for you, doll." Bucky put his finger under your chin and stared deeply into your eyes. You grinned happily before leaning into him and kissing him deeply.

"Uh hum." Someone coughed and you blushed slightly when you broke the kiss. You almost forgot you were in the kitchen with everybody. When Bucky stared into your eyes like that you felt like it was just the two of you in the world. Nothing else existed and time stopped.

"S-Sorry..." You muttered quietly.

"So, what were you two talking about?" Nat asked.

"I'm taking my doll outside this afternoon." Bucky replied.

"Is that so?" Sam raised one eyebrow. "Where are you going?"

"To the park." Your boyfriend replied.

"Just taking a walk. It's nice out." You added.

"We were thinking of going out as well, maybe we could join you?" Nat suggested. You grabbed Bucky's hand under the table and squeezed it.

"No way. You guys go on your side, I want some alone time with my girl." You smiled and blushed when he said that. You really felt loved.

"Wow, uh rude." Sam said.

"You guys don't wanna be with us anyway." You said. "We'll just separate ourselves from the group and do our own thing, it won't be nice." Bucky brought your hand to his lips and kissed the back of it.

"How is it different from what you already do here?" Tony asked.

"And when we do you complain." Bucky replied.

"Well, we don't have to spend the whole afternoon in different groups. You guys can go on that walk and then you join us or we join you?" Steve suggested. You looked at Bucky and he shrugged.

"Yeah, okay. Let's do that." You smiled at the captain.

"Sounds like a plan." Sam concluded.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> By the way I wanted to warn you all... I think this is it. This fic will probably end in a few chapters, I don't think I'm gonna reach the big 100.  
> I have no more ideas about this and it's starting to take me way longer to write chapters than it did in the beginning.  
> I have a LOT of ideas for the Loki x reader though and I'm really excited to write that instead.  
> So, yeah. Enjoy the last chapters guys :')


	80. A Wish

"I'm glad you asked me to go outside with you." Bucky smiled at you when you both got into your car.

"Really?" You asked. "I honestly just didn't feel like hanging out in our bedrooms while it was nice out."

"So, is this a date?" He asked.

"Ooh, definitively is." You bit onto your lower lip as you smiled back at him. Bucky caressed your cheek with his hand before he leaned on you to kiss. "C'mon, let's go. I know you, if we keep kissing you're gonna get all worked up and we're not gonna move from the parking lot." You giggled slightly.

"I really love the woman you've become." He said before starting the car. You blushed a bit as you looked at him. Somehow that really moved you.

You finally got out of the parking lot of the tower and then you were on the road to go to the park. The winter soldier had one hand on the wheel and the other was on your thigh. You turned on the radio and let the music play at a normal volume. You had brought your hand to his nape and gently caressed him there.

"Bucky?" You called out to him after you both went quiet for some time on the road. He was focused so you didn't want to bother him but you also really missed his voice.

"Yes, my love?" He replied.

"Ok, first of all I love when you call me that-" You admitted with a small blush. He turned his head towards you and smiled lovingly. "And second I just wanted to say that I love you." You said before taking the hand that was on your thigh and bringing to your lips to kiss the back of it.

"And I love when you say that you love me." Bucky tangled his fingers with yours and then brought your hand to his lips to reciprocate what you just did to him. You stared at his face and you couldn't help looking at the small bruise just above his cheekbone.

"I hope you don't find this weird but you know you look so hot with that bruise on your face." You let out.

"I know, I noticed you staring during lunch." He grinned. "That's why I didn't ask you to heal it." You blushed instantly of shame.

"Y-You noticed?" You asked.

"You weren't looking at my eyes when you were talking to me, you were looking at it and you didn't propose to heal it. I quickly figured it did things to you." Bucky smirked.

"Isn't it painful?" You asked.

"Are you kidding? It's nothing." He brushed off.

"You know... When we talked about my powers with Wanda she told me I needed to practice my powers to try to find out my full ability and control them better." You explained.

"Do you want to practice on me?" Bucky asked.

"What? No, never. I-I'd be too scared to do something bad. But you know for exemple when I healed your headaches, I had no idea I could actually do that. Or wake someone from a deep nightmare. Maybe there _is_ more to my powers..." You said.

"Whatever that you choose to do, you know I'll always support you." He said to you.

"I know." You smiled. "And I'm really thankful. I feel less scared when I'm with you." The winter soldier squeezed your hand in his.

"What do you want to do?" He asked.

"Maybe I should ask Fury about it... Or start with Tony, I know him more. The problem with my powers is that-" You sighed. "It's not like you guys training. I can't aim at a target and train safely. I-I'm scared of having to try to find out the full potential of my abilities on humans or animals. I'm scared of hurting a living being." You lowered your head as you explained. "M-Maybe I shouldn't try, after all my powers can heal and they do a useful job at the moment. What if I screw up something?"

"Doll-" Bucky stopped at a red light and then carefully made you turn your head so you could look at him. "You're the strongest and smartest person I know. You have the strongest will, if you don't wanna hurt, you won't hurt. And as long as I'm around no one will force you to anything. I totally volunteer if you wanna practice on me." He smiled at you. "Look at all the good you've done to me and I'm just speaking about your powers-" He winked. "You've healed my headaches many times and nothing ever screwed up. Why is that in your opinion?" He asked.

"I-I really wanted to help you." You replied.

"I'm not a mutant and to this day I still don't get how it works and how you heal but I'm pretty sure your powers do good because you're the one controlling them. Because _you're_ good and you wanna help people." You were teary eyed when he was done.

"I love you Bucky..." You leaned onto each other's faces and kissed tenderly until the honking sounds outside made you both realize you were in the middle of the road and the light had turned green a few seconds ago.

"Oh shit." Bucky focused back on the road. You giggled slightly next to him. "Time just stops when I look at you." He said.

"I feel the same." You replied with a smile on your face.

  
  


You spent some more time on the road until Bucky stopped the car and you got out.

"We have to walk a bit until we reach the park. There's no parking place so I stopped here." He explained to you.

"I trust you." You said. You went by his side and took his hand before you started making your way to the specific area.

As you walked with Bucky you started getting a bit emotional. In your wildest dreams you would've never imagined this actually becoming real. Having a boyfriend, holding hands and basically just being happy. It felt like you were living someone's else life. You grabbed his hand with both of yours and brought it to your lips before keeping it close to your chest.

"What are you doing?" Bucky asked you with a small smile on his face as he turned his head to look at you.

"Making a wish." You replied as you kept facing forward.

"What wish?" He asked.

"If I tell you it won't happen." You replied and then you smiled slightly.

"Alright, keep your secrets." He said in a friendly tone.

"You have nothing to worry about." You added before re putting a kiss on the back of his hand.

You walked for fifteen minutes until you finally reached the park. It was really big and pretty. The grass was green, the flowers were blooming and they were in all sort of colors. You could hear children laughing as they played with their parents and other kids. You could also hear ducks on the river next to the park. The place wasn't too crowded but it wasn't desert either. The playgrounds were full actually and customers were lining up in front of the ice cream and hot dogs sellers. For the first time you didn't feel uncomfortable. You were with your boyfriend and you weren't afraid.

"Come." Bucky pulled you gently to walk on the side. You noticed he was headed towards an area to the park that seemed empty.

"It's so beautiful here." You let out as you kept looking around.

"Not as beautiful as you." He replied.

"Aw, c'mon Bucky." You giggled slightly in amusement.

"What? It's true." The winter soldier leaned on you and kissed your cheek.

"Thank you, Bucky..." You said quietly.

"For what?" He asked.

"For... Everything. Everything that you've done to make me happy." You took a deep breath to not get emotional again. You stopped walking and then turned towards him to wrap your arms around his body. Bucky hugged you back and put a kiss on top of your head. "Oh my God-"

"What?" He barely had time to ask, you let go of him and kneeled to pet a dog that walked past you.

"Hey~" You greeted the small Corgi that stopped at your feet to get some pets. "You're so adorable. What a good boy!" You grinned happily as you rubbed the dog's neck. It excitedly licked your cheek and you giggled.

"Leon! Come back here!" You heard someone shout. The dog left you and ran back towards its master. You waved at the stranger, he was a teenage boy. He head nodded at you and left with his dog.

"I'm sorry, I just love animals so much." You said to Bucky when you stood back up.

"Don't apologize, you're the most adorable thing." He grinned before putting a kiss on your lips. "Come, I wanna go over there with you." You took his arm and followed him where he wanted. He brought you towards a place of the park where no one was wandering. Bucky sat under a tree where you two would be protected from the sun and then he gave you his arm so you'd join him. You kneeled and then turned around to sit between his legs. The winter soldier wrapped his arms around your stomach and then he started leaving kisses on your nape from behind.

"You're tickling me." You giggled.

"Doll, I've never been this happy in my life." Your eyes widened in surprise.

"Bucky..." You turned your head to face him. You gently brought your hand to his cheek and caressed him there. He took your hand and left a kiss inside your palm.

"I never want to be separated from you again." He said quietly as he stared into your eyes.

"Me too. I-I honestly... All of this feels so unreal to me..." You confessed. "I-I used to dream about this. Having a significant other, to have someone tell me they love me... I-If someone had told me I'd get all this 1 year ago I would've never believed it." You lowered your head. "And to be really honest with you I-I still don't get it... Why would someone as great, as kind, as hot-" You smiled slightly. "as you be with someone like me..."

"I never want to hear you say stuff like that about yourself. Look at you, you're good, you're respectful, you're funny, you're caring, you always want to help people around you, why wouldn't anybody fall in love with you?" Bucky asked as he looked into your eyes. "Do you think physical appearance is everything? Because I know that's what you're thinking at the moment. People out there have tried to tear you down because they sensed your potential, they felt how amazing you were destined to become. They were jealous of you and so they tried to keep you tamed so they could have control over you." He gently wiped a tear off your cheek. "I told you, you are a literal Goddess and I'm the one wondering how you could... pick someone like me at the end of the day..."

"B-Bucky... I'm in love with you, I'm always thinking about you, when I wake up, before I sleep, while I'm doing whatever. You're always the one on my mind. Y-You were my first... My first everything. Meeting you was the best thing that's happened to me in my entire life. H-Had it not been for you..." You breathed deeply to hold back a sob. "I-I don't wanna think about it but I-I was really... miserable. I was really doing badly and not okay..." You confessed. "You saved me in more ways that you can imagine." He was tearing up as well and then he started chuckling slightly.

"I feel exactly the same, doll. You have no idea how life was at the tower before you came in to my life and into the others as well. Do you think we all used to hang out every night? That we always had dinner at the same time? We do all of this now because you brought us all together and made us closer. Remember the first day? When Steve told me I was late for dinner and I replied it wasn't the first time? Or the next day when you asked me if we had schedules for lunch and I told you that people do whatever, you walk into the kitchen, sometimes you find people, sometimes you don't. I haven't missed one dinner or one night out since you're in the tower. I used to be a shadow, people barely saw me. You saved me in more ways than you can imagine too." He smiled at you. You turned your body and wrapped your arms tightly around his back as you cried quietly.

"We... saved each other." You concluded.

"We did." Bucky replied. He made you raise your head and then you kissed passionately. You were out of breath when you broke the kiss. You felt everything Bucky wanted to give you during that kiss. You loved it.

"Damn-" You started. "Had it not been for the fact that we're outdoors and in public I would've asked you to make love to me." You let out with a little smile on your face before hiding your blushing face against his clothed chest.

"You say that as if it would stop me." He chuckled.

"I'm in love with you, Bucky." You raised your head and looked at him. You caressed his back with your hands while he leaned and kissed you again. "I love you so so much." You put your hands on the sides of his head and left a trail of kisses everywhere on his face. His cheeks, his nose, his forehead, his chin and of course his lips. Bucky grinned happily while you kissed him. His heart beat fast, he was truly the happiest man alive.

  
  


\---

  
  


After spending some time on the grass you both got hungry so you decided to buy sandwiches and then sit on a bench to eat them.

"After you eat your stomach always has that little bump, it's the most adorable thing ever." Bucky grinned as he poked your belly.

"You know, I think if you had told me that a few months ago I would've killed myself." You replied. "The fact that now it's not even crossing my mind, I don't even feel like crying."

"I'm really proud of you, you know?" He said as he stared tenderly into your eyes.

"It's thanks to you. You know... People didn't only just make comments, they made faces as well... When I got too close for exemple and their faces would scrunch in disgust because they didn't want me to touch them... You... You and the others never did that to me at the tower. When I go to hug Tony he doesn't push me back, Steve naturally hugs me on his own, Thor always smiles at me and Nat compliments me-" You discreetly wiped a tear that appeard in the corner of your eye. "I-I really feel loved." You said.

"You are." Bucky replied. "You are loved. I'm truly sorry so many bad things happened to you but me and the others, I promise, are doing and will do everything to fix all the bad that's been done to you."

"I-I'm sorry, I keep ruining the mood." You said before breathing deeply.

"You have nothing to apologize for my love, I'm glad you're sharing everything with me." Bucky smiled at you. "Do you want to take a walk? I don't think we're joining the others, it's almost 5."

"Yeah, let's do that before we go back."

 


	81. Top 5 Favorite Moments With You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew, sorry this took longer to get posted. Not gonna lie it's getting really hard finding the motivation to end this and also I started writing the loki x reader.  
> Well, in hopes you forgive me this chapter is longer than all the others.

"Bucky, stop laughing!" You pouted as you walked through the hallway to join the dining room.

"Oh God, you both did not fight again. We can never leave you two alone." Nat said when you stepped with your boyfriend in the kitchen. Everyone was already around the table.

"You guys will never guess what happened-" Bucky was literally crying of laughter.

"You plan on telling everybody?!" Your eyes widened.

"They deserve to know." He replied as he pulled a chair for you and then one for himself.

"What happened?" Sam asked while you sat down.

"Ok, ok, so-" The winter soldier took a deep breath to calm down. "You know we went to the park for a walk and all- It went great by the way." He added. You crossed your arms on your chest and rolled your eyes next to him as you listened. "Long story short two women started... hitting on me-"

"What?" Wanda was surprised.

"In front of you?" Nat asked you. You nodded.

"Wait, the best part is coming. I turned them down because obviously-" Bucky said as he took your hand in his. "My heart is already taken." Your lips curved into a small smile as you blushed slightly.

"What happened then?" Bruce asked.

"They got upset and called me an asshole and stuff..."

"The nerve on some people..." Steve shaked his head.

"And then-" Bucky re started laughing.

"Oh my God..." You lowered your head.

"Come on, tell us! What's so funny?" Tony asked.

"We were eating ice cream cones as we walked with my doll before those two women came to bother us-" He turned his head to look at you.

"Well, you started. Finish the story now." You said.

"Doll grabbed our ice creams and just-" Bucky cried because he was laughing so hard. "Smashed the cones on their heads." He held his stomach and bent over as he laughed.

"No way!" Nat let out. You put a hand on your head as you lowered it in shame when the others started roaring with laughters.

"Wow..." Sharon let out.

"This is the best thing I heard today." Thor said.

"The women got mad of course-" Bucky continued. "But my doll was determined, I knew the 3 of them were about to fight so I picked her up and we left the park. I laughed the whole way in the ride back here."

"One hell of a woman huh?" Sam grinned.

"God, I'm so in love with her." The winter soldier admitted as he wrapped his arms around your waist and put a kiss on your cheek.

"B-Bucky!" You blushed instantly a deeper shade of red.

"I'm so impressed." Tony let out.

"Who are you and what did you do to our [Y/N]?" Bruce joked.

"W-What?" You let out. "Was I just supposed to let them insult him after he politely turned them down?"

"That's the love of my life right there." Bucky grinned as he held you tightly against him.

"Bucky, s-stop being embarrassing!" You were still red.

"That's so adorable." Nat smiled.

"I didn't expect you to have it in you." Thor commentated. He seemed proud of you.

"C'mon, let's change subjects. What did you all do?" You asked.

"Eh, just walked around the city. Checked out a few shops and then we had a drink." Steve replied.

"We thought about meeting with you two but we decided to let you have your alone time." Vision said.

"Now I kinda regret it, I wish we could've seen that fight." Sam grinned in amusement.

"Oh, you really missed out. Trust me." Bucky said.

"C'mon, stop." You lightly nudged your boyfriend in the side. The winter soldier stared at you tenderly before he leaned and put a kiss against your neck. You smiled slightly and caressed his cheek with your hand.

"Well, let's dig in." Bruce announced.

"Yeah, I'm starving." Nat added.

  
  


While you ate the conversations started naturally and then people started suggesting plans for the night. You gently grabbed Bucky's hand under the table.

"Not you." Your lips curved into a small smirk.

"Really?" He raised one eyebrow. "What am I doing tonight then?" He asked you.

"I thought we agreed you needed a private healing session? You have a bruise on your face that I need to take care of." You leaned on him and discreetly whispered to his ear. "I need to check you for other bruises and heal them as well." You smiled.

"Sorry guys, I'm feeling kinda tired. I don't think I'll join you all for tonight's plans." Bucky said to the Avengers members.

"What about you, [Y/N]?" Nat smirked.

"Well, you know. I'd feel really bad about leaving him alone..." You replied as you pointed to your boyfriend. "What if he needs something but can't move from his bed? I need to stay next to him."

"Uh huh... Alright then." Sam let out as he raised his eyebrows.

"I promise you all we'll join you for an activity tomorrow." You said. Bucky guided your hand to his lips and kissed the back of it as he looked at you with heart eyes.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Come here." Bucky sat on the edge of your bed and brought you against him before catching your lips with his. He laid on the mattress and pulled you on top of him. You giggled happily as you kissed him back.

"They almost made me feel bad about leaving them-" You said against his mouth. "But I much prefer being here with you." You gave his lips a cat-like lick to tease him.

"Doll, I want you so fucking badly." Bucky said quietly against your mouth, he sounded so needy. "Been wanting you since this morning."

"I love you so much Bucky, I feel so good when you say that to me." You smiled before kissing him again.

"Oh, I'll say more then." He smirked. "I love making love to you. I love the sounds that you make, I love the way you cling on me when I'm-"

"B-Bucky!" You blushed deeply.

"That I love as well." He chuckled lowly. "You're so innocent, so pure, you drive me crazy." He said before putting a kiss on your chin. "The way your body trembles when you reach your orga-" You kissed him to shut him up. God, he really wasn't ashamed of anything.

"Lay properly on the bed." You ordered him when you broke the kiss. You got off him and removed your shoes while he did the same and then he laid his head on the pillow before you straddled his hips. You leaned on your boyfriend and kissed him again while your hands traveled on his clothed torso. Bucky gripped your hips and started slowly grinding against your crotch. You've been thinking about something that you wanted to try since lunch so you decided to do it. You broke the kiss and left a trail of kisses on his face until you reached the bruise on his cheekbone. Your eyes were closed, you focused on the injury and tried to summon your powers. You softly put your lips against his bruise and then you felt it. The wound was vizualised in your head like when it did when you healed with your hands. You opened your eyes and leaned back to check his face. Your eyes widened. "Bucky!"

"What? What's wrong?" He asked you, he got a bit startled by your call.

"I-I... I healed you! Y-Your bruise, it's gone!" You said as you carefully touched his cheek with a trembling hand.

"Really?!" The winter soldier was as surprised as you were. "I thought I felt something warm but I thought it was just you."

"O-Oh my God..." You passed your hands on your face. "T-There really is more to my powers..." You let out.

"Babydoll, are you alright?" Bucky asked you. He took a sitting position and wrapped his arms around your body for comfort.

"Y-Yes, I-I'm just really... I-I don't know, surprised? Scared? Excited? I-I'm just wondering how much more I can do..." You said.

"Hey, you know I'm here for you, right?" He asked. "Tomorrow, we can tell Tony or Fury so we could arrange training sessions for you if you want. I'll come with you." You looked at Bucky and smiled at him.

"Thank you so much." You wrapped your arms around his neck and hugged him tightly against you.

"Anytime, babydoll." Bucky grinned happily and hugged you back. "I have more bruises if you want to try right now."

"W-What if I hurt you?" You asked.

"I know you won't. You control your powers, they don't control you." He replied. "And even if you accidentally do, you can still heal me with your hands. I trust you, my love." That ignited something inside of you.

"I want you so badly, Bucky." You leaned on him and crashed your lips against his.

"Really?" He raised one eyebrow in amusement. "How badly?"

"So, so, so, so, so badly." You giggled slightly against his lips as you kissed him between each word. You put your hands against his chest and pushed him to make him lay back on the mattress.

"Please touch me, doll." Bucky asked you. You smiled at him before you started unbuttoning his shirt. You buried your head in the crook of his neck and kissed his skin there. When you were done with the buttons you opened his shirt and ran your hands on his naked torso. God, feeling his warm muscles under your touch was always very pleasant, for both you and him. Your lips started traveling further down from his neck to his collarbone until you reached his chest. You left a trail of kisses on his skin and his nipples, you couldn't help noticing the bruises on his sides. You decided to try healing him again. You grinned widely when it worked.

"I-I can't believe I really healed you with my mouth." You let out.

"Everything is possible with you, you're a Goddess." Bucky smiled tenderly at you.

"Stop getting hurt though. You scared me during training this morning." You pouted.

"I promise you I'll be careful." He said. "Come here, my beautiful doll." The winter soldier opened his arms for you to snuggle against him and you did. "I'm so in love with you."

"Me too, Bucky." You giggled slightly. His hands slipped under your shirt and he caressed your stomach and waist until he reached the clasp on your back. He unclasped your bra and you gasped in surprise, not expecting it. Bucky teasingly bit the side of your neck while you still had your arms wrapped around him. "Hhh!" You shivered when you felt his teeth on your skin.

"We never thanked Steve and Natasha for those dares during our first game." The winter soldier chuckled lowly against your skin.

"If you wanna thank them it should be for a bunch of stuff." You replied. "The dares, the beach, my new clothes, even my first time... It's Nat who encouraged me while we were at the zoo and you went to get Pizza with Steve."

"What, really?" He asked.

"Suddenly you don't think she's a bad influence on me, huh?" You smirked.

"I still think she's doing way too much." Bucky argued.

"C'mon, had it not been for her I would probably still be locked in my room before my birthday party."

"Seing how that ended I think it would've been better."

"C'mon, it's in the past now. And you're the one who asked her to help me." You replied. "And I know it was you who asked her about the swimsuit as well." You raised one eyebrow.

"Oh shit, she told you?" Bucky asked.

"She didn't have to. I immediately guessed." You smirked. "We know each other way more than we thought. Enough talking about the others though. I want you to focus on me now."

"You're all mine." He grinned.

"I'm all yours." You replied before catching his lips with yours. You pulled on his lower lip softly with your teeth before letting go and leaning back to take off your shirt. While you did he took of his as well and then you threw your clothes somewhere on the floor next to the bed. Bucky took back a sitting position and then he wrapped one arm around your waist. His eyes wandered on your naked torso.

"You're so beautiful, so perfect." He breathed before leaning on your chest to leave kisses on your skin. You blushed as you felt your heart do a little jump. Bucky's opinion was the only one that mattered to you now. You felt beautiful when **he** called you beautiful.

"O-Ow, fuck!" You cursed. Bucky chuckled after he bit your nipple. You gulped as he took it back in his mouth and sucked. "B-Bucky..." You moaned. His free hand grabbed your other breast and then he started fondling it. You felt that familiar tingle in your lower stomach again. You were getting very excited. You rolled your hips against his and you smirked when he let out a moan against your chest. Bucky raised his eyes and looked at you. He was clearly challenging you to do that again. You could feel it since earlier while you were sitting on him, his bulge under your clothed crotch.

"Are you gonna ask me to take care of it?" He whispered. "Like this morning?" You shaked your head slowly as you looked at him mischievously before biting onto your lower lip.

"Take off your pants, Bucky." You said to him.

"Why don't you take them off yourself?" He asked with a smirk.

"Because I'm gonna remove mine." You replied. You moved off him and unbuttoned your jeans.

"Keep your panties on." He ordered you.

"You're such a pervert." You rolled your eyes before smiling. You did as he said though and left your underwear on. You both threw your pants on the floor and then you straddled back his thighs as he sat against the bed frame. "Give me your metal hand." You said. Bucky's brows furrowed in confusion but he gave it to you anyway. You took it and put it between your thighs.

"What are you doing?" He asked.

"Warming it up-" You replied. "Because it's this one I want inside of me."

"Any reason to that?" Bucky asked.

"J-Just..." You blushed slightly. "I-It felt really good when you came back from your mission..." You admitted.

"When I made you feel good in Bruce's lab?" He smirked.

"D-Do you have to say it out loud?" You lowered your head in shame. "But yes... Back then."

"You were so mad at me." He laughed in amusement as he rememberd.

"You mean I was worried. **Very** worried." You replied. "You came back with bruises and claws marks all over your body, I had imagined the worst during those 10 days..."

"I'm really sorry, babydoll." Bucky felt bad.

"It's fine, you know I'm not mad anymore and I forgave you long ago-" You smiled in reassurance.

"My heart beat so fast when I finally saw your face. You seemed well, I mean even if you looked annoyed-" His lips curved into a small smile as he rememberd. "That was and still is the most important to me." You leaned on your boyfriend and kissed him deeply. "Did you actually think there was something between me and Sharon?" Bucky asked when you both naturally broke the kiss.

"I-I don't know! I mean, the first thing that hit me when I saw her was how pretty she is and then before I heal her she took her pants off in front of you and Sam. I-I was kinda worried, yes." You confessed. "But yes, I admit. Because of the 10 days where I had no news about you I-I may have been a little paranoid."

"A little?" He smirked.

"Alright, a lot." You blushed. "What can I say? I'm just really in love with you and I want you all for myself." You smiled at him.

"You have no idea what you just said did to my heart." Bucky put his flesh hand behind your head and brought your face back against his. While he kissed you his metal hand had finally warmed up so he started rubbing his fingers on your clothed crotch.

"Hmm~" You hummed pleasantly against his lips. You put your hand on his bulge as well and started palming it through his underwear.

"Please, just touch me already-" Bucky breathed against your lips.

"I was gonna say the same." You smiled.

"I doubt you've been waiting since this morning." He teased.

"Hm... Since the park." You said.

"If I had known I would've taken you in the backseat. We didn't do it in your new car yet." He smirked.

"You were too busy laughing to actually be... excited." You let out.

"Don't make me remember-" He let out a chuckle. "I think it's in my top 5 favorite moments with you." Bucky confessed.

"Really? What are the other 4?" You smiled.

"I'll tell you if you make me feel good." He said as he took your hand and carefully put it inside his boxers.

"Making you happy is the only thing I want." You replied before leaning on him and catching his mouth with yours for a sensual kiss. You gently grasped his dick in your hand and then you started pumping him. Bucky was warm and hard, you couldn't wait for him to enter you.

"Hmmm..." He moaned against the kiss. He rubbed you through your clothes and then he's had enough of teasing you so he moved your panties out of the way and then he pushed two metal fingers flat on your clit.

"P-Please, Bucky..." You muttered.

"I got you, babydoll." The winter soldier whispered. "Remove your panties and sit on my lap." You groaned of frustration when he moved his hand away. You quickly took off your panties, he took that opportunity to lower his underwear as well. "Come here." He said when you were done. He wrapped his flesh arm around your hips and brought you close to him. "Spread your legs so I can touch you."

"You want me to spread my legs so you can stare again." You rolled your eyes before smiling. While you slowly spread your thighs Bucky licked his metal thumb and then brought it back to your clit. You closed your eyes and blushed as he flicked your little bundle of nerves.

"You're the prettiest thing I've ever seen." Bucky grinned happily as he touched you. You leaned on him to wrap one arm around his neck and then you kissed him deeply while your other hand was between your bodies. "I'm not gonna last long-" He breathed against your lips as you rubbed his dick.

"Bucky..." You moaned his name.

"I got you, doll..." You felt his thighs twitch under you, his skin was getting redder on his face and neck, you knew he was close.

"Come for me baby, please-" You said to the winter soldier and pumped him faster and harder.

"Come closer." Bucky asked. You approached your boyfriend and he buried his head in the crook of your neck. He softly kissed your skin there then you heard him groan quietly.

"Hhh..." Bucky bit you again but you let him, you loved it when he did that. He grabbed your hand with his flesh one and squeezed it suddenly when he came without any warnings. You felt something wet and warm land on your breasts. You were leaning on his body so they were dangling just above his crotch. Bucky breathed your name and panted against your neck.

"Oh fuck, sorry." He noticed your chest when you leaned back.

"It's fine." You said. He grabbed a few tissues on the nightstand and then proceeded to wipe it off your chest. "As long as it's not in my eye." You added with an amused smile. Bucky threw the tissues away and then he grabbed your head to kiss you deeply. Air got knocked out of your lungs. His tongue played with yours while his hands went to your waist and then he inversed your position. He laid you on the bed and spread your legs before his metal hand went back to your pussy.

"Eyes on me, the whole time." He ordered you. You gulped and then you nodded. Bucky inserted one finger inside of you and it was enough to have you throw your head back on the pillow. He pushed a second one right after and then he curled them inside of you while his thumb did circles around your clit.

"B-Bucky..." You moaned.

"Tell me where it is." The winter soldier ordered you. "Is it here? Or here maybe?" He smirked while you moaned louder each time while his fingers explored your slippery walls.

"O-Oh my God! Bucky!" You rose up when he brushed against a soft spot.

"I got you, babydoll." Bucky smirked before gently pushing you back on the mattress. He slided himself between your legs and towered above you. "Look at me." You were shivering when you crossed his eyes, suddenly he started drilling his metal fingers inside of you and you swore you saw stars. You were pretty sure that your soul had left your body and Bucky thought so as well when he saw your eyes roll back. Your entire body was shaking under him. He chuckled lowly as he left kisses on your collarbone. "Shh, calm down." You were still feeling the effects of your intense orgasm minutes after it washed over you. You were panting and your face was warm. You stared at the ceiling while you tried to catch your breath back.

"Hhh..." You whimpered when the winter soldier finally pulled his fingers out of you. He was literally afraid of doing anything to you after that orgasm.

"Are you okay, my love?" Bucky asked after he laid next to you.

"I-I... Wow." You let out. "Hug me, please. Tightly." You asked as you laid on the side of your body. Your boyfriend proceeded to big spoon you like you requested. He wrapped his arm around your stomach and brought your back against his chest.

"I'm in love with you." Bucky whispered with a smile on his face before leaving a kiss on your shoulder from behind.

"Me too-" You replied. Your heart was beating fast and you were still panting. "T-Talk to me, please." You asked.

"My fifth favorite moment with you was today." He smiled as he rememberd. "Seeing you defend me, it made my heart jump." He said.

"T-They deserved it..." You said.

"My doll, I will literally die for you." Bucky admitted.

"Don't you dare!" You protested. He chuckled slightly before leaving another kiss on your back.

"My fourth favorite moment is the cabin." He said.

"The cabin is only in the fourth place?" Your eyes widened in surprise. "Wow, it's like my favorite I think."

"Well, the first days were great but we know how it ended." Bucky said behind you.

"Hmm." You lowered your gaze in front of you.

"I think it deserves its fourth place. And by the way it was great living with you like that, I remember when you made me food, when we took walks outside or when we slept together." He smiled.

"God, me too. It was almost perfect." You smiled in nostalgia. "What's the third one?"

"When I had my nightmare and you stayed with me during the night." He replied quietly. You felt his arm squeeze tighter around your stomach.

"That was so scary." You admitted. "My heart almost stopped when I saw you laying on the ground."

"I almost forgot I almost choked you." He added.

"Scary as well." You raised one eyebrow. "I much prefer having that arm between my legs." You joked.

"Oh, you mean right here?" Bucky smirked as he slipped his metal hand between your thighs.

"Bucky, stop-" You giggled as you seized his wrist and moved his arm to put it back around your waist. "Keep holding me." You requested with a smile.

"Everything my babydoll wants." The winter soldier smiled back as he held you against him. You could feel his crotch sticking to your butt but you didn't mind.

"What's the second one?"

"Our date. The first one." He added. "I was so nervous, I knew how the night was gonna end but I had no idea how you were going to react."

"Aw, I loved our first date as well." You said. "I was nervous too of course. You looked so good, it felt so unreal you asked someone like me out."

"What did I tell you about that?" Bucky raised one eyebrow. He hated hearing you say mean things about yourself.

"I know you don't wanna hear it but it's true, it's how I felt." You grabbed his hand and kissed it. "To this day I still feel like I'm living in a dream."

"It's no dream, doll. It's real life." He gently turned your body so you could face him. "I love you and it's real." Bucky said before leaning on your face and kissing you passionately. You caressed his cheek with your hand as you kissed him back. You felt butterflies flutter inside your stomach, he made you the happiest.

"I'm so in love with you." You replied quietly with a shy smile on your face. The winter soldier put another kiss on your lips and then on your nose before making you take back your position so he could hug you from behind again. "What's the first one?" You asked.

"My first favorite moment with you and is the one that made me realize there was something about you. We had a small contact and I felt electricity run through me." Bucky told you.

"The kitchen?" You asked as you smiled.

"Yes." He replied. "I know I already told you about it but I'm really glad I'm the person you reached to." Bucky smiled.

"I-I knew I could count on you after what you did in the night. Trust me, it could've gone really badly. When I ran into my room after you found me I had decided that I would leave in the morning without saying bye to everybody. I would've just gone to Tony and warn him."

"Really?" Bucky's eyes widened.

"Yes." You nodded. "I told you, back then I-I was really not doing well."

"I'm really thankful you didn't then." He replied. "I heard what you said to me and I knew you were starving that why I brought you back your food."

"You had no reason to do that." You replied.

"You had no reason to open up to me either. Like I told you back then it was teamwork. Well, that was half a lie."

"What?" You asked as you turned your head.

"It hurt me to see a pretty girl cry." You blushed instantly.

"I thought we said no lies-" You started.

"Only the truth babydoll. Every women I see around here, I mean SHIELD, Avengers and else, no one looks like you and I don't only mean physically. Have you noticed how everyone around here is so confident, strong, they look like they don't need anybody?" He asked. You nodded. "I'm not saying you caught my eye because you seemed weak but because you were different. I felt something in that kitchen in the morning." Bucky looked into your eyes. "You needed me." He said.

"I-I... Wow. I-I had no idea that was... You know, _the thing_ that made you interested in me." You let out. "For days, you drove me crazy. Every night I wondered why you seemed to... like me? Want to spend time with me? To be really honest I thought you felt bad and pitied me because of what I said to you."

"I never pitied you. You went through bad stuff and it hurt you, that's like... Just very normal, you know." He said. "What would've been scary is if you felt nothing. The others are really good at hiding what they feel but not you, I can read you like a book." Bucky smiled. "I love that about you."

"Right when I thought you were the one who wore your heart on your sleeve." You giggled slightly.

"I'm really saddened you can't see how wonderful you are."

"I do." You replied. "I see it in your eyes." You smiled emotionally. "You're the only one who makes me feel wonderful and beautiful. I feel worthy when you look at me, when you compliment me, when you touch me..." You turned a bit so you could lean on his face and then you catched his mouth with yours for a tender kiss.

"My mission is done then." Bucky smiled. He caressed your body with his hands as you kept kissing.

"Bucky?" You called out after you both broke the kiss to pull out for air.

"Yes my love?" He replied.

"I-Is it too late for... Y-You know..." You smiled shyly. You took one of his hands and put it on one of your breasts. "You know what it does to me when you say you love me." Bucky squeezed it gently as he smiled and then he leaned to kiss you again.

"You're the best thing that's happened to me." He grinned.

"I love you too." You replied with a little giggle. The winter soldier sticked his body to yours from behind and then he carefully lifted your leg with his hand.

"Keep your leg up while I-" He let go of your leg and grabbed his erected dick to guide it to your entrance.

"O-Oh, fuck..." You gripped the sheet in your hand while he gradually pushed his length inside of you.

"Babydoll you're so warm... It feels so nice-" When he was fully in he held the back of your knee and slowly pulled out to push back in.

"Oh God, stop commentating please... Fuck!" Bucky rammed it back in. You grabbed his free hand in yours while he thrusted at a normal pace inside of you. The winter soldier left a trail of kisses on your back until he reached your neck. You shivered as he licked and sucked on your skin there. You knew he wanted to mark you again. "B-Bucky..." You moaned.

"So tight everytime-" He breathed before biting your shoulder.

"Hhhn!" You closed your eyes and squeezed his hand. "D-Deeper, please go deeper-" You begged him. He bent your leg with his other hand and then moved his hips so his dick could reach deeper inside of you. "O-Oh my God..!"

"Are you gonna come for me my love?" Bucky whispered to your ear behind you.

"Keep going and you'll find out-" You replied. You heard him chuckle lowly in your hair. Suddenly he let go of the back of your knee and grabbed your hand with which you were gripping the sheets. The winter soldier made you keep your own leg up and then he brought his hand between your legs. "B-Bucky!"

"You're gonna come for me." He said as he rubbed your clit with his fingers. Oh, Bucky wasn't asking. He also thrusted faster inside of you, he was close. You moaned louder and blushed of embarrassment. You felt the knot in your lower stomach pleasurably ache and your legs turned into jelly.

"B-Bucky, I-I'm gon- Aaah! Please! Right there! Bucky, don't stop!" You begged him. He held you tightly against him and thrusted harder inside of you until he felt your walls contract around his length. Your eyes rolled back inside your skull as you let out a long moan. Your thighs shaked against his and you got goosebumps. Soon enough Bucky buried his head in the crook of your neck and his movements started going slower. He groaned quietly as he spilled inside of you. He wrapped his arms around your stomach and squeezed you as you lowered your leg. You were both panting and sweating after this. You passed a hand on your face and hair as you tried to catch your breath back.

"Is my baby satisfied?" Bucky asked with a smile.

"Hmm." You nodded happily. "I love you Bucky." You held his hands against your stomach.

"I love you too [Y/N]." He put a kiss on your cheek when you turned your head.

 


	82. I Promised You All

"Did we really have to go with them?" Bucky asked you before you got into the car.

"Hm, I heard that." Nat said. "No, no. I'm sitting between you both." You climbed into the backseat of Steve's car and then Nat followed before Bucky could. He rolled his eyes and then climbed in as well.

"Don't be mean." You said to your boyfriend with a little smile, he made you giggle.

"I feel like it's been forever since we spent a night with you both." Steve said.

"I promised you yesterday, didn't I?" You asked.

"You don't owe them anything." The winter soldier's brows furrowed in annoyance.

"I owe them everything." You replied. Nat smiled at you and took your hand in hers.

"Why are you whining?" Sam asked after he sat next to Steve at the front. "Your girl never went ice-skating, I bet [Y/N] prefers coming with us rather than being held prisoner with you upstairs."

"Debatable." Bucky raised one eyebrow.

"[Y/N]?" Nat asked you.

"Oh, no, no. I'm not saying anything." You replied. "I'm not risking upsetting any of you guys."

"Come on, let's go. Sharon is already driving away with the other car." You had to take two vehicles since all of you were going except Tony and Bruce.

Steve started the car and then got out of the parking lot of the tower. You were actually going to the mall, you guys had heard they were exceptionally installing an ice skating rink. The others suggested it and you said yes. You were very excited, as mentioned earlier you never went ice-skating.

"Natasha, could you pass a message for me to [Y/N]?" Bucky asked the redhaired woman. Your brows furrowed in confusion. What was he playing at? He spoke out loud and the car was small, everyone heard. Whatever he had to say to you he could just... say it.

"Sure, what is it Bucky?" Nat played along.

"Tell my beautiful doll I love her." He smiled, proud of his silly game.

"Oh my God-" You put your palm against your forehead and lowered your head in embarrassment as you blushed. "Bucky, you're crazy."

"Crazy in love with you." He replied with a grin.

"Uh hum." Sam coughed at the front.

"You guys are the ones who insisted on us coming with you all." The winter soldier told them.

"I'm starting to regret sitting between you both." Nat let out.

"Please, I'm so sorry." You said.

"[Y/N], don't apologize for Bucky." Steve said to you.

"How can I not? He's the love of my life." You admitted with a shy smile and then Nat, Sam and Steve let out the longest and most desperate sigh you've ever heard. Bucky was chuckling next to the black widow.

"They're in too deep." Sam said.

"Maybe we should separate them for a week again like we did before they went to the cabin." Nat suggested.

"Oh, you try that." Bucky challenged them.

After some time on the road you finally made it to the parking of the huge mall. Bucky gave you his hand and helped you get out of the car.

"Thank you." You smiled at him.

"I'm afraid you're gonna catch a cold wearing only that." He said as he looked at your naked legs.

"Make up your mind Bucky, yesterday you wanted me to wear a skirt." You said before closing the door of the car. The winter soldier put his arm around your shoulders and then you walked towards the other half of your group.

"Let's go gang." Steve announced after Sharon locked the car her group traveled in. She was with Thor, Wanda and Vision. While you waited in front of the elevator Bucky put a kiss in your hair. You raised your eyes to look at him and you smiled at each other.

"Hey, you two move forward, the elevator's here." Sam said to you and your boyfriend.

"Sorry, I got lost in my doll's eyes." Bucky replied and you smiled as you blushed while you stepped inside the lift.

"I've had enough of you two." The falcon added. Everyone let out a little laugh.

"We should do the ice-skating first." Nat suggested.

"Yeah, good idea. Then we can have a drink." Steve added.

"Let's go then." Thor said.

You went to the floor where they had the ice skating attraction and then your group went over the counter to borrow ice skates for everybody.

"It's not too crowded, I expected more people." Sharon noticed while you were all lining up and turned your heads towards the ice rink.

"Well it is kinda late, families already went home with their children." Wanda replied.

"It's only 8." Bucky added.

"Bucky, at what time do you think kids go to bed?" You asked your boyfriend.

"I don't know, you tell me when we have ours." He replied before looking at you and smiling. Your eyes instantly widened and your face turned into a deep shade of red.

"B-Bucky, you... mean that..?" You asked a bit shocked honestly.

"Doll, I want everything with you." Small tears had appeard in the corner of your eyes. You wrapped your arms around Bucky's neck and made him lean a bit so you could reach his lips and kiss him deeply. His hands rubbed your back while you kissed.

"Uh hum." The employee behind the counter coughed in shame. It was yours and Bucky's turn to get your skates.

"Buck." Steve put a hand on his best friend's shoulder.

"Sorry." He let out after you two broke the kiss. You blushed of embarrassment and lowered your head. "Come, I'll help you." The winter soldier said to you after you took your ice skates and then headed towards a bench where the others were sitting already.

"I can do it on my own." You said to your boyfriend who kneeled in front of you while you were removing your shoes.

"Shh." Bucky shushed you before smiling. He carefully put his hand on your right leg and then lifted it to put your foot in one of the ice skates. "Is it comfortable?" He asked you.

"It's not tight, I think it's the right size." You replied. Then he made you wear the other one and before standing back up he put a kiss on one of your knees. He sat next to you and proceeded to change into the ice skates as well.

"Everyone ready?" Steve asked.

"Almost." You said to the captain and then he glanced at you and the winter soldier. "But you all can go already, Bucky and I will come right when he's done."

"Alright then. See you in a minute." He smiled at you. You watched the super soldier leave the bench with the others and get on the ice rink. When you turned your head to look back at Bucky he was already looking at you. He leaned on your face and kissed you passionately.

"Hmm- c'mon Bucky, we have to join them." You said after you broke the kiss.

"I'd rather stay on this bench with you." He breathed against your lips.

"Don't do it for them, I wanna try ice-skating. It looks fun." You said softly to him. Bucky looked at you before sighing.

"Fine." He finally let out. He got up and gave you his hand to help you stand.

"Thank you." You smiled at him. "Those skates are a bit hard."

"Sorry, I should've warned you to wear warmer and thicker socks while we were at the tower." Bucky said.

"Don't worry, it will be fine." You took his hand and held onto him to walk with the skates. It felt different. The closer you got to the ice rink the colder it got.

"Doll, you're okay?" He asked, he noticed you seemed a bit weird.

"Yeah, yeah. Don't worry about me." You replied.

"How can I not?" He smiled. "Alright, I'll get on the ice first then I'll help you." You waited for his signal. "Give me your hands and hold onto me. It's very slippery so don't move around a lot."

"Okay." You listened to his instructions. You put one foot on the ice and damn, indeed it was super slippery.

"Alright, now the other one- Like that. You're fine, I got you doll." Bucky smiled at you as he held your hands in his. "Stand straight, you're gonna fall if you keep bending over."

"O-Okay, just don't let go of my hands yet." You said.

"I won't. I'll stay next to you the whole time. Don't hesitate to hold onto me if you feel like you're gonna fall. I'll catch you." He smiled at you.

"I love you Bucky." You smiled back at him.

"Me too babydoll." He approached you and put a kiss on your forehead. "Alright, let's try moving a bit. Have you ever wore roller skates before?" You shaked your head. "Ok, well... It's basically the same. So just move your legs like that-" He proceeded to show you. "See? Right, left, right, left- Just take your time, go slowly." After some time you finally succeeded to do it.

"Hey, so how do you like it?" Nat asked you after she stopped next to you and the winter soldier.

"It's fun." You replied.

"You're okay [Y/N]?" Steve stopped next to you as well and asked.

"Yeah, I'm glad. It's a fun activity." You smiled. Bucky brought your hand to his lips and kissed it.

"Someone seems to have a harder time though..." The redhaired woman dragged her eyes to a tall blonde on the other side of the ice rink.

"Oh my God, Thor-" You let out.

"Watch out!" Sam came quickly towards your group and playfully made your boyfriend fall on the ice. Sharon came towards you all as well.

"Ah!" Thankfully Bucky let go of your hand to not make you fall with him. Nat and Steve helped you stand up. "Oh my God, Bucky are you okay?" You asked him when he got up.

"Oh this time I'm gonna end him." Bucky left you with team cap and went to chase after Sam who kept laughing. You looked around and saw Wanda and Vision skate together while holding hands, they were very cute.

"You guys can continue skating, I'll hold onto the fence and make my way towards Thor." You told them with a smile. "Tell Sam if he breaks my boyfriend though I'll never heal him again." You joked. They nodded with amusement and then went back to the middle of the ice skating rink.

"Alright, well warn us if you need anything." Steve said before he left you. After you spent five minutes struggling you finally reached the God of thunder.

"Why is it always us both?" You giggled.

"I hate those shoes, I'm cold, this isn't fun at all." Thor replied.

"Oh c'mon, it's a bit fun. It's because no one showed you." You handed him your hand. "I'll show you what Bucky showed me."

"No, no, it's too dangerous." He said.

"Thor, it's fine. Just don't make... abrupt movements..." You said to him. "And stop bending over like that, you're gonna fall." Finally he gently grabbed your hand and then you proceeded to teach him how to ice-skate. "See? You're doing it." You grinned happily.

"Thank you, [Y/N]." The Asgardian smiled at you.

"You're absolutely welcome." You giggled slightly. "You're right though, I am getting cold as well. Since they said we were going to the mall I didn't think about how cold it would be."

"Ah, it's too bad I left my coat in the car, I would've lent it to you." He lowered his head.

"It's fine, don't worry about that." You smiled in gratefulness. "Come on, let's keep ice-skating. If we achieve to do it without holding each other's hands maybe we can have a little race." You giggled.

  
  


\---

  
  


"I can't believe you beat me... twice." Thor was baffled.

"Not that mighty anymore, huh?" You joked with the Asgardian.

"I'm worthy, not all mighty." He corrected you.

"Whatever, I still beat you." You giggled. You've been ice-skating with the Avengers for forty-five minutes. Bucky hadn't come back to you since he left to chase Sam but you didn't mind it. He was way too fast for you and you didn't want to steal his fun. You were having a good time with Thor who was at the same level as you in ice skates anyway. "What?" You asked the God of thunder when you noticed him staring at your face.

"Your nose is red and your lips are starting to turn blue, are you sure you're okay?" He asked. Your brows furrowed in confusion and then you touched your face with the middle of your palms that were warm. You were indeed cold.

"I- Yes, I'm okay." You replied. "A little cold won't kill me." You added. And three seconds later you sneezed.

"Alright, enough ice-skating for you." Thor said before taking your hand and slowly guiding you towards the entrance.

"Hey, where are you two going?" Nat asked. It made everyone else turn their heads towards you and the God of thunder.

"[Y/N] catched a cold." Thor explained to them. "I think it's time for her to stop."

"I'm fine!" You protested before sneezing again.

"Doll, are you okay?" Bucky asked you when he came at your level.

"I think we've all had enough. We've been skating for 1 hour." Vision said.

"Yeah, I agree." Steve said. He waved to the others who were still skating and gestured them it was time to go.

"God, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have left you like this." Bucky said after he took your hand and guided you to the bench.

"Bucky, I'm okay." You replied.

"Your skin is frozen." He said after he touched your naked legs with his flesh hand. "And your little adorable nose is all red. You're cute but it makes me the worst boyfriend." He said as he looked at your face. Then he proceeded to remove your ice skates.

"Wear this, [Y/N]." Steve approached you and Bucky and put his jacket on your shoulders.

"Thank you." You smiled at the captain.

"Here you go." Bucky stood up after he finished with your shoes.

"I love you." You leaned on him and kissed his cheek when he sat next to you to deal with his own shoes. "Did you have fun?" You asked him.

"I did. My only regret is not spending more time with you." He replied.

"It's okay, we'll have other opportunities." You cheered. "I had fun with Thor as well." You added.

"I'm happy you did." The winter soldier smiled at you and then he leaned on your face to put his lips on yours.

"Let's go you two." Sam threw as he walked past you and Bucky. Your boyfriend sighed deeply before getting up.

  
  


You sat around a long table at a café that was still open at the mall and you were currently deciding on what to drink.

"I'll take a frozen coff- Atcha!" You sneezed. "A hot chocolate." You corrected yourself and then wiped your nose with a tissue while your friends laughed.

"My poor babydoll." Bucky smiled as he ran his hand through your hair and then he put a kiss on the side of your head.

"Don't make fun of me..." You pouted.

"I would never." He looked deeply into your eyes with a tender expression.

"I'm hungry, I think I'll take a slice of cheesecake as well." Nat said. "Sharon, do you wanna share it with me?" She asked the blonde female agent.

"Sure." She replied.

"I wanna order a crepe and share it with you as well." Bucky said to you.

"Is it a good idea?" You asked.

"Why wouldn't it? They're our favorites."

"Okay then." You smiled at him.

A waitress came to your table and took all your orders before going back behind her counter.

"I'll come back." Bucky said to you as he got up.

"Where are you going?" You asked.

"Uh... The bathroom." He replied.

"O-Okay." He put a kiss on top of your head and left.

"Achoo!" You turned your head.

"Oh my God, you too?" You asked Thor.

"Dude, careful." Sam said to him. He had sneezed so abruptly the table shaked.

"Sorry-" The God of thunder apologized before sneezing again.

"Well, we might have to drop by the drugstore before going home." Steve said.

"It's always you two, it's funny." Nat chuckled lowly.

"What do you mean?" Wanda asked.

"There was that time we watched a horror movie and they both got scared, another one where they got sick on a rollercoaster-" The redhaired woman explained to the members of the group who weren't there during that time.

"I had forgotten about that." Steve let out a little laugh. You crossed eyes with Thor and you both started laughing as well.

"Ah, I think the waitress is having trouble with all our drinks. I'm gonna help her." Sam said as he got up.

"I'll come as well." Steve said and then they both left.

"Where did Bucky go?" Wanda asked you.

"Bathroom." You replied. "But yeah, he should be back. I'm getting a bit worried." You added.

"Maybe he's just lost. The mall is huge." Nat said.

"Here you go." Sam interrupted you all as he put the drinks on the table with Steve and the waitress.

"Thank you again for the help." She smiled at the two of them.

"No problem." Steve replied.

"Enjoy your drink, don't hesitate if you need anything else." The waitress then left your table.

"Oh, that feels good." You let out after you took a sip of your hot chocolate.

"Oh my God, [Y/N] don't turn around." Nat said to you.

"What? W-Why? What's behind me?" You asked a bit startled.

"Just Bucky, don't worry." Wanda replied. Your brows furrowed in confusion.

"Here." The winter soldier finally came at your table and then he dropped a huge bouquet of red roses in front of you. "For you."

"Oh my God..." You lowered your head. "Bucky, why?" You asked.

"Um, because I love you?" He replied as he took back his seat next to you.

"There's like fifty roses in there." Sharon noticed.

"And it's still not enough to represent my love for my doll." The winter soldier smiled before leaning on you and putting a kiss on your cheek.

"I love you too but you really don't need to shower me in gifts." You bit onto your lower lip as you looked at the roses.

"It makes me happy to make you happy." He said.

"It makes me embarrassed more than anything to be honest..." You said. This was still very nice though and it made your chest warm. You didn't want to make Bucky feel bad for giving you a gift after all. "Thank you, they're very pretty." You smiled at him as you wrapped your arms around his waist.

"Are you feeling better? I mean your cold." Bucky asked you.

"Well, I don't feel as cold as before but I don't know if I'm actually gonna be sick." You replied.

"Hmm, your head's a bit warm." He put the back of his hand against your forehead. "Maybe I should take you to hospital."

"Bucky, it's a cold. I'm not gonna bother a doctor for this." You replied. "I'll just have a warm lemon tea with honey before sleeping and tomorrow I'll be good." You were not going to be good. "Eat your crepe, I haven't touched it yet."

"Why not?" He asked.

"Was waiting on you to feed me." You teased with a smile.

  
  


After the drink you all decided to call it a night and finally go back home but on your way to the parking of the mall your group passed by that familiar photobooth again.

"Oh, I know that look." Steve said when Nat stopped in front of it and looked at you all with stars in her eyes.

"I'm afraid I do as well." You added.

"Brings back memories." Thor grinned in amusement.

"Wanda, Sharon, [Y/N], come! I wanna take a picture with my girls." The redhaired woman announced excitedly.

"Do I have to?" You asked a bit sadly. "I look bad and sick-"

"Go in there, you look perfect." Bucky said to you with a smirk. He had his arm around your waist and without any warnings he suddenly slapped your butt with his hand. You gasped loudly as your eyes widened making everyone turn their heads towards you both. They didn't see him do that. You brought your hands to your mouth and blushed in shame as you looked at your boyfriend. The winter soldier was proud of him, you could tell by the amused grin on his face. You just stared at him while you walked towards the photobooth, the other girls were already inside.

"Why did you shout?" Wanda asked you when you closed the curtain after you got in.

"N-Nothing..." You replied.

"Alright, smile girls!" Nat said to you all. You sighed in resignation before looking at the screen in front of you and starting to smile as well. Then you heard a click sound.

"Here we go." The black widow said. "[Y/N] stay in, take one with Bucky." The girls stepped out and then your boyfriend was pushed inside the booth. You rolled your eyes after you looked at him. You moved to the side to let him share the lone seat with you.

"What?" He asked.

"Why did you do that? Are you crazy?" You finally asked him.

"Crazy for y-" You slapped your hand against his mouth.

"Oh! Bucky!" You let out in slight disgust. You removed your hand when you felt his tongue against your palm. He clicked on the buttons in front of you both to program the picture while you pouted.

"Come on, smile. I wanna keep this." He said to you as he put his arm around your shoulders and brought you closer to him. Bucky gently put his fingers on your chin and made you turn your head. "You look so adorable, your little nose is all red." He smiled tenderly before leaning on you and gently bite one of your cheeks. Just your chance, that's when you heard the click sound. You turned your head to look at him. "I wanna eat you." Your lips started slowly curving into a small smile. "Let's take another."

"Okay." You replied softly. You wrapped your arms around his neck and then faced forward for the picture. Bucky hugged you tightly against him and then you both smiled for the picture. Another click sound.

"Are you both done yet?" You heard Sam outside of the photobooth.

"We are." Bucky replied as he opened the curtain.

"We were getting worried when your first pic came out." He said as he handed you two the freshly printed photo.

"I can't believe this-" Bucky said as he looked at it. "I have a picture of your scrunched nose." He looked at you happily.

"Oh my God..." You lowered your head.

"This one is cute." Wanda said as she handed you the second one.

"I prefer this one as well." You said as you showed it to Bucky.

"You keep this one and I'll keep that one." He said to you.

"Deal." You replied. While you were talking Nat went back to take pictures and she dragged Steve and Sam with her. After everyone was done you finally went to the parking lot.

"Are you okay, my love?" Bucky couldn't help noticing you shivering next to him.

"Hmm." You nodded. "Thankfully Steve lent me his jacket but I'm really feeling the cold around my legs." You said.

"We'll be home soon, I promise. I'm gonna put you to bed, cover you with warm blankets and bring you that tea." He smiled at you.

"You're the best, Bucky." You smiled back at him.

"What I wouldn't do for you, doll." Bucky put a kiss on your forehead. You got out of the elevator and climbed inside the cars.

 


	83. "Bubby"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Giving my chapters titles was a mistake.

"Hhh!" You turned around in your bed for the five hundred times stealing all the blanket from Bucky... Again. The winter soldier sighed deeply and just let you take it. It was morning anyway so he decided to get up. He headed to the bathroom to clean up and when he came out he found you still asleep but your breathing seemed weird. He could hear it with his super hearing ability.

"Doll?" Bucky joined you in bed and hugged you from behind, he was only wearing a towel around his hips but you were buried under the blanket so you couldn't notice.

"Mmm?" You opened one eye and immediately closed it, the room was bathed in sunlight.

"Good morning, my love~" He smiled and then put a kiss on top of your head.

"Bubby..-" Your nose was stuffed.

"What did you say?" You both's eyes widened.

"Oh my God-" You suddenly coughed loudly and it sounded really bad.

"Babydoll, I think you catched a cold." You clicked your tongue and then removed the blanket off you to take a sitting position on the bed. "Don't look at me like that." Bucky chuckled lowly. Your hair was all disheveled, your face was pale and your nose was red. You looked really sick.

"My head hurts, Bubby." You whined before laying back on the mattress.

"You're staying in bed and I'm gonna call a doc." He grabbed the hem of the blanket and covered you properly with it.

"Wait! I'm... I'm hungy-"

"Please stop being so adorable I'm having a really hard time holding myself back right now." He said to you with a grin. Bucky approached you to kiss but you stopped him.

"D-Don't, you're gonna be sick too..." You said a bit sadly. You removed the blanket and got off the bed. "O-Oh..." You took a step back and dropped on the bed again.

"Are you okay?" Your boyfriend worried.

"I just got up too quickly, my head started spinning-" You explained.

"Stay here-"

"No, I'm gonna take a shower then go downstairs for breakfast." You argued.

"Call me if you need anything." He shaked his head as he watched you go into the bathroom. He knew there was no way to stop you. While you were showering he heard you sneeze several times. Bucky was starting to worry if you were taking a cold shower. "Are you okay?" He knocked on the door.

"Yes!" He heard you shout on the other side. He decided to leave you alone for now. Since you were in his room and you had no clothes in here besides a few pajamas Bucky decided to grab some warm clothes for you in your room. When he went through your closet he found a few interesting items of clothing he would love to see you in but for now he stayed correct and so he grabbed thick layered clothes, he also found a scarf and decided to take it. When he came back in the room the water sound had stopped but you were still in the bathroom.

"Doll, I grabbed a few clothes for you." Bucky said after he knocked on the door.

"What?" You asked after you opened the door a bit.

"Wear this." He handed you the clothes.

"You went to take my clothes?" You asked. "Thank you Bubby, I love you." You smiled at him and took them from his hand before closing the door. You re opened it five seconds later. "You forgot my underwear."

"Oh right, sorry. Wait, I'll come back." The winter soldier got out of his room again to go get your underwear in yours. Finally he came back. "Here you go." He fetched you your clothes.

"You like those?" You asked him. Your brows furrowed a bit but you smiled in amusement as you looked at the lingerie.

"Caught red handed." He grinned. You smiled at him before closing the door again. Five minutes later you got out.

"Thank you." You hugged him from behind.

"You're welcome, my love." He turned around and leaned to kiss but you stopped him again.

"Nuh huh, I don't want you sick because of me." You argued.

"I'm gonna die without your kisses." He warned you.

"Stop being silly." You giggled slightly before coughing again.

"Alright, come downstairs quickly. You're gonna eat and then I'm gonna put you to bed." He said as he gently took your arm to pull you out of his room.

"Okay." You accepted. After all you were indeed feeling bad and your head was still aching.

"Put this on properly." Bucky faced you in the elevator and wrapped your scarf around your neck.

"Has the tower always been this cold?" You asked as you put your arms around your own body.

"What?" His brows furrowed. "Babydoll, it's literally warm."

"Oh, it's just me I guess then." You replied.

  
  


"Hey, good morning you two." Nat greeted you and your boyfriend when you walked into the kitchen.

"Hey..." You muttered.

"What was that?" Tony asked when he heard your hoarse voice.

"She's... sick." Bucky let out.

"Oh, no." Steve said as he looked at you.

"Go sit, I'm gonna make your tea." The winter soldier ordered you. You gently squeezed his hand before leaving his side and taking a seat around the table.

"Hey, [Y/N]." You turned your head and found Thor grinning next to you.

"How are you not sick too?" You asked.

"I'm not mortal." He replied proudly. "All I needed was a good night sleep."

"Life is so unfair." You grabbed your head between your hands as you put your elbows on the table. "What are you doing up so early anyway? We're not used to having you around for breakfast." You noticed.

"I just woke up earlier." The Asgardian brushed off.

"Okay." You said.

"Here you go." Bucky put your hot drink in front of you and then sat next to you.

"Thank you, Bubby." You smiled at him.

"Bubby?" Nat and Sam crossed eyes before roaring with laughters.

"Stop, I feel like my entire face is stuffed." You said.

"Are you gonna see a doctor?" Steve asked you. You pointed to Bucky with your head.

"Oh, yes, she is." The winter soldier said. "Eat." He ordered as he handed you a piece of toast with honey spread on it.

"Thank you." You replied before taking a bite out of it. When you washed it down with the tea you started coughing again.

"Oh, that sounds bad." Bruce commentated.

"And gross." Wanda added.

"This is what happens when you all force us to join you for an activity." Bucky said.

"He's really blaming this on us." Nat said.

"We should've just stayed together." He put his metal arm around your shoulders and then put a kiss against the side of your head. You giggled slightly, he made you laugh.

"I love you." You said discreetly to him with a tender look on your face. Bucky licked his lips as he looked at your face. You couldn't describe his expression, it's as if he was really holding himself back from doing something.

  
  


\---

  
  


You had stayed in bed for two days agonizing. You catched a cold and you had a fever as well. You really hated being sick, if you had known you were going to end up like this you would've never went ice-skating. A doctor had came to the tower to check on you and before leaving he prescribed you a bunch of meds that Bucky went to get for you.

You were really thankful to the winter soldier. He was so sweet during those two days. He stayed with you in your room, he fed you, he read to you, he caressed your hair while you slept, you were really deeply in love with him. Not that you had any doubt but he just confirmed your feelings.

The others had checked on you as well but they didn't stay for too long, you didn't want them to catch your cold and Bucky chased them away naturally anyway. Even if you were sick he still wanted to spend his time alone with you. You hadn't touched each other since this, the only thing you did was hug or hold hands. It reminded you of your first weeks at the tower. You didn't know if Bucky was... frustrated but if he was he hid it really well.

"It's been 5 minutes, open your mouth." The winter soldier asked you. He took the thermometer and checked your temperature. "Hmm, 37.9°c. It's higher than normal but not alarming. Maybe you're getting better. Do you feel better?" He asked you.

"My head doesn't hurt anymore and my nose isn't stuffed but my throat is still sore." You explained.

"I'm gonna make you another tea."

"Bucky, I had one thirty minutes ago." You whined. "Stay with me, please." You requested him and pulled the blanket off you a bit so he could join you.

"How can I say no to that?" He smiled before letting out a little sigh and laying next to you. You wrapped your arms around his waist and hugged him.

"I... really love you." You confessed.

"Babydoll, there isn't one thing I wouldn't do for you." You blushed.

"Stop saying stuff that makes me want to kiss you." You pouted and he chuckled.

"You have no idea what I wish I could do to you right now." Bucky turned his head to look at your face.

"S-Soon, okay? I promise, once I'm healed I'll let you do everything you want." You smiled shyly at him.

"I hope you don't regret that." He teased.

"I trust you." You added. The winter soldier gently brought his hand to your cheek and caressed it. He couldn't help his finger tracing over your scar there and his expression turned a bit sad.

"You're the best thing that's happened to me." He confessed in a quiet voice.

"Bucky, what did I just say?" Small tears appeard in the corner of your eyes. You buried your face against his clothed chest and clinged tightly onto him. Bucky smiled happily as he hugged you and rubbed your back.

_**Knock! Knock!** _

"Who's that?" Bucky asked. You and your boyfriend were both confused. "Wait, I'll get it."

"Hey." It was Steve. You waved at him, the captain stayed by the door frame with the winter soldier.

"What can we do for you?" Bucky asked.

"It's the others last day and we're all gathered in the common room. We thought maybe you two would want to join us." He explained.

"Yeah. Yeah, of course." You replied when Bucky turned to look at you. "Let me just change out of my pajamas." You said.

"Sure, take your time. I'll go warn everyone else." Steve smiled. "See you downstairs." He said to Bucky before leaving. Your boyfriend closed the door behind him.

"Are you sure you wanna go? You're still kinda sick."

"C'mon, they're gonna leave tomorrow. The least I can do is spend one last night with them." You said. "And besides, we're not going out. It'll be like chilling in here." You added.

"Alright, then. I'm just worried about you."

"And I love you for it but I'm fine, Bucky." You smiled at him. "Let me just wash my face and brush my hair first." You said before you disappeard into the bathroom.

When you came out you changed clothes and then you and the winter soldier took the elevator to go to the living space.

"Hey, you two." Wanda greeted you both.

"Are you feeling better?" Vision asked you.

"Eh, I'm still sick but yeah, I think I'm better." You smiled at him.

"Come sit with us." Nat threw to you both. You joined them on the couch, Bucky sat first and then he pulled you on his lap with a smile on his face. You smiled back at him as you wrapped one arm around his neck.

"So, I heard you four are leaving?" You asked.

"It's time. Me and Sharon have been hanging in here for a very long time." Sam replied.

"Me and Vis couldn't stay forever, you were already aware of that." Wanda added.

"Well, it was fun while it lasted." Tony added.

"Hm, indeed. It was cool meeting you guys." You said to them.

"It was our pleasure as well, I'm sure." Vision said.

F.R.I.D.A.Y started playing some music in the background and everyone started splitting up, conversations with people naturally began.

"How are you feeling?" Bucky asked you after he put a kiss to the back of your hand and then looked at your face.

"You don't need to ask me all the time." You giggled slightly. "And a bit tired to be honest."

"Do you wanna go back upstairs? We've been here for quite some time now." He proposed.

"I-I don't know, won't it be rude?" You asked a bit worried.

"You're sick, they'll understand." Bucky reassured you.

"Okay th-" You re started coughing.

"Alright, let's go. I'm gonna tuck you into bed and bring you a tea before you sleep." You both got up from the couch.

"You're leaving us?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, sorry. I'm afraid this time it's not an excuse, doll is still sick." The winter soldier explained to the falcon.

"No worries, I understand." Sam smiled at you.

"Goodnight." You threw to everyone in the room before stepping out of the living space. "You don't need to come with me to our floor. I'll find my way." You joked to Bucky in the elevator.

"Okay." He pushed the button of the floor where the kitchen was and then stepped out when the lift arrived. "I'll be quick." You smiled at him before the elevator door closed again.

  
  


"Whew, I'm so tired." You thought out loud after you changed back into your pajams and then got under the covers. You couldn't help your eyes closing when your head hit the pillow.

"Babydoll, are you asleep?" Bucky asked you when he came in the bedroom.

"Hmm..." He heard you under your little nest of blankets and pillows.

"Come on, drink your warm tea first and then I promise you I'll let you sleep." He put your drink on the nightstand and then kneeled next to your side of the bed. He gently caressed your hair out of your face before booping your nose. You smiled slightly as you opened your eyes and found him looking at you with a tender expression on his face.

"Bucky, you're so dreamy." You let out softly.

"I love you so much, doll." He leaned on you and put a kiss on your forehead. "Come on, sit please." Bucky put his arms around your body and helped you into a sitting position. You took the drink he handed you and then took a few sips from it while he changed out of his regular clothes. He only put on his grey sweatpants and... that's it?? He sat next to you on the bed, shirtless.

"Are you trying to tempt me or something?" You asked as you raised one eyebrow.

"I have no idea what you're talking about." He smirked in amusement.

"If you don't put on a shirt I'll take off mine as well, Bucky." You replied before taking another sip. "Which would be very mean of you since you know I'm cold and sick."

"Take it off." He challenged you.

"I'm sorry?" You asked.

"Yeah. Take it off and lay on your back, I'm gonna spread this on you." He got the vaporub from the bag that contained all your other meds that the doctor prescribed you days ago.

"I-Is it a good idea?" You asked after letting out a little sigh. "Wouldn't want you to get... you know, all worked up-" You blushed. "Because I'm really tired and we're not-"

"I'm not gonna jump on you, doll." He reassured you. "I do miss touching you though." Bucky smiled. "I think the vaporub is a perfect solution. It will allow me to touch you and it will make you feel better."

"You should be a salesman." You joked. He was really good at convincing you into doing stuff.

"So, is that a yes?" He asked.

"It's a yes." You confirmed. You put the empty mug of tea back on the nightstand and when you turned around Bucky already had his hands on the hem of your pajama shirt.

"Lift your arms." You did as he said and then he proceeded to remove your clothes. His hands went behind your back and your brows furrowed in confusion.

"I don't think I need to take off my bra for this." You said.

"You're not gonna sleep in it anyway-" He unclasped it. "And I want to see you." Bucky grinned as he finally slipped the straps off your arms and then threw your bra somewhere on the floor.

"Bucky, I'm not helping you if you get... excited." You blushed slightly. He chuckled against your skin while he left a kiss on your neck.

"Lay down, doll." Your back hit the mattress again and then Bucky straddled your hips. "Am I heavy?" He asked. You shaked your head.

"Oh fuck, it's cold." You cursed when he started spreading the vaporub just above your chest.

"It's gonna warm up." You gulped as you watched your boyfriend gently rub your skin. You closed your eyes and let him take care of you.

"Hhh, Bucky... I don't think it's supposed to go this further down..." You let out. His hands traveled from your neck and cleavage until he reached your chest. He gently fondled your breasts and occasionally circled your nipples with his thumbs. "B-Bucky..."

"I'm sorry doll, I can't help it. You're so beautiful, your flustered expression, your quiet sounds... I love them all so much." He smiled as he leaned to put a kiss on your cheek. "I love you."

"You're so troublesome, I just wanna sleep." You giggled slightly. "Come on, enough. I wanna kiss you and touch you too but not while I'm sick. I feel gross." You suddenly brought your hands to your face and sneezed. "Oh God... I hate this. Bucky get off me, I need to grab a tissue." The winter soldier did and then he took a tissue from the nightstand before bringing it to your face.

"Blow your nose." He said to you.

"Give me that, it's disgusting." You took the tissue from him.

"I don't think anything coming out of you is disgusting." Bucky confessed and your eyes widened as you blushed instantly.

"W-Why would you say that?" You asked with small tears in your eyes after you wiped your nose.

"Are you crying?" He asked.

"No... I-It's the vaporub, the smell is very strong." You lied. Bucky wrapped his arms around you and hugged you tightly while he grinned happily. "You're cute but also kinda weird..." You let out.

"You love me though." He said next to your head.

"I do." You rolled your eyes before smiling a bit.

"Alright-" He let you go and grabbed your pajama top to put it back on you. "Go to sleep, baby." Bucky raised the covers for you to slip under and then he nicely tucked you in.

"I'm in love with you Bucky, thank you for taking care of me." You said to him in a soft sleepy voice before closing your eyes.

"Sweet dreams, my love." He put a kiss on your forehead and then you both went to sleep.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Can I speak to you?" You raised your head in surprise. It was Sharon who asked you.

"Um, yeah. Sure." You said. You got up from your chair and followed her into the hallway. Bucky looked at you leave with the blonde female agent but he kept quiet. His brows were furrowed in confusion. You were all gathered in the dining room for breakfast before some of the members were to leave the tower.

"I-" Sharon stopped walking and then turned around to look at your face. "I just wanted to say I'm sorry for what I said to you one time in the kitchen before everything that's happened." Her eyes widened a bit in realization. It's been a really long time.

"It's fine." You let out with a sigh. "I appreciate you apologizing and you're forgiven." You said. "I didn't forget you really tried to protect me while we were... at the village." You said.

"Still, I shouldn't have. We weren't close friends and it wasn't my place to comment. Bucky told me-"

"What?" Your eyes widened. "When??" You asked.

"While Wanda was using her powers on you." She replied.

"I can't believe he spoke to you behind my back, I told him not to." You sighed.

"Oh, you're not the one who sent him?" Sharon asked.

"What? No and to be honest I didn't care anymore after everything that's happened." You explained. "I didn't even remember I told him about it."

"Well, it's fine. He was right to tell me about it. Anyway, sorry again [Y/N]." She repeated.

"Thank you and don't worry, we're good." You smiled slightly at her.

"Ok, cool." She smiled back. You both walked back into the kitchen.

"Where did you go with her?" Bucky asked you after you sat back next to him.

"Oh, she wanted to apologize for what she said about the cereals because you know... Someone wasn't supposed to talk to her about it." You said as you glared at your boyfriend.

"...Crap." Bucky let out.

"I can't believe you did it while you knew I couldn't stop you." You rolled your eyes.

"Whatever. She apologized and it's what you deserve." He said. You looked at your boyfriend before facing forward again but you slowly leaned on him. He smiled as you rested your head against his shoulder.

"Wanda." Vision called out to the scarlet witch while she was discussing with Nat.

"Ugh, already?" She asked.

"We have a plane to take." He replied.

"Well, I guess this is it." Sam said as well.

"It sure is going to be quiet in here with 4 less people." Bruce said.

"Eh, we'll meet again." Wanda smiled.

"Oh, I count on that." Nat said and Steve nodded.

You all got up and started hugging each other in the kitchen, you weren't all going to accompany them in the parking lot.

"Thank you so much for helping me." You said to Wanda while you took her in your arms. "For the trauma and... the mutant part." You smiled at her, you were a bit teary eyed.

"You're welcome, I was happy to meet you." She smiled back at you. "We'll keep in touch?" She asked.

"Obviously!" You replied.

"Ah, my boy's girl-" Sam said to you before hugging you. "I complained a lot about you both but I'm glad he found someone like you."

"Stop or I'm gonna cry." You giggled a bit sadly while you hugged the falcon.

"You make him happier. Don't change [Y/N], you're one hell of a woman."

"Alright, you both have been hugging for long enough now." Bucky came between you both and separated you.

"He was saying nice stuff about you." You told your boyfriend.

"Doubt it." Sam and Bucky crossed eyes before starting to laugh together and hug as well. You shaked hands with Sharon and Vision while everyone else was saying bye and then Steve and Nat went with them to the parking lot.

"There's really just 5 of us in this kitchen now huh?" Tony noticed.

"Months ago it used to be like this as well." Thor said.

"People come and go in this tower, I'm sure we'll welcome someone else new soon too." Bruce said.

"You're the best thing that's happened to this tower." Bucky whispered next to you.

"I love you Bucky." You smiled at him before wrapping your arms around his waist. You still weren't allowed to kiss, your cold wasn't gone yet.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof, I got a bunch of things to say.  
> First, I'm really sorry about what I did to Sharon in this fic, I actually really love her character in the MCU but like Thor in the first chapters of this work I needed some sort of antagonist to make my story progress and I didn't want to create some sort of unnamed character like the agent who kissed Bucky during the party so unfortunately Sharon got sacrified for that part.  
> Second, the next chapter will probably be the last one y'all. It's going to be longer so I'm not sure yet if I'm gonna split it in two or post it in one big chapter.  
> Third, I've been wondering about this for some time now but I always forgot to ask. What versions of the characters do you imagine when you read this? For exemple which version of Bucky do you imagine? His civil war appearance, his infinity war, endgame?? Do you see Thor with long or short hair? Etc... I didn't really describe my characters physically because I wanted the readers to imagine the versions that you liked. Tell me which versions you thought about and I'll reveal in the next chapter which I was thinking while I was writing.  
> Fourth, I would also really like to know which chapters do you guys liked the most? Was there some things that you really liked? Or something that you disliked?  
> As always, thank you for reading <3


	84. Thank You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter is definitively the last one.  
> This took longer to come out but hey, at least it's extra long (+11k words!)  
> Also there's a revelation about Thor... ;)  
> None of you replied in the last chapter (LOL) but anyway when I was writing this fic in my head I had civil war Bucky pictured. It's just the Bucky I fell in love with, his long hair, his beefier appearance, I just really liked that. For Natasha it was the winter soldier, I think she looked her best in that movie. I always described her as the "redhaired woman" so I doubt any of you pictured her infinity war appearance but if you imagined her appearance from other movies I guess that'd work too. For Thor it was the dark world or age of ultron, his hair was really long and I thought he looked nice but surprisngly for this chapter I started picturing his short hair in ragnarok o_O (maybe it's because I rewatched it last week haha). For Bruce, Tony and Steve it was age of ultron as well but well, they looked relatively the same in all the movies so I guess we pictured the same thing.  
> Anyway, enough babbling. Enjoy this chapter guys, I really liked writing it :)

You were finally not sick anymore. Two days had passed since Sam, Sharon, Wanda and Vision left the tower. You spent most of your days in bed reading or watching tv shows. Sometimes Bucky joined you or he went training. He proposed to you to join him and just watch but you didn't feel like it. He continued taking care of you but it didn't escalate from there. No kisses, no foreplay, no sex. You knew the winter soldier probably wouldn't have minded touching you while you were sick but you couldn't. Sometimes you had a fever, sometimes you were tired and sometimes you just didn't want to be touched. You felt gross, your nose was running, your eyes were puffy and your throat hurt. But at long last one morning you were finally cured.

You ran out of bathroom after your shower and jumped on the bed to wake your boyfriend who was still asleep.

"Bucky!" You called out him.

"Hmmm?" He didn't move, he was sleeping on his stomach.

"I'm not sick anymore!" You announced happily. You slipped your arms under his blanket and ran your hands on his naked back. He slept shirtless again.

"...Doll?" He called out in a sleepy voice.

"Good morning, baby." You said happily and then you leaned to leave small kisses on his nape and shoulders. His skin was soft and warm, it felt good to the touch. "I love you so much." You whispered between kisses. Bucky finally started moving so you leaned back. He laid on his back and opened his arms but his eyes were still closed. You giggled as you leaned to snuggle against him. He wrapped you between his muscular arms and God, you could melt. In his arms, that was your favorite place in the world.

"Hmm, you smell good." Bucky suddenly spoke just above your head. Then his hands started wandering on your body and his brows furrowed slightly. "Are you... naked?"

"Hmm." You nodded excitedly. "I took a shower. Finally got rid of all the traces of my cold." You explained. You ran your hand on his side and traced the muscles there with your fingers. You turned around a bit and then you started leaving kisses on his torso as well. "Love of my life." You let out loud.

"I really missed this." Bucky said as he opened his eyes. His heart was beating fast inside his chest, he could really feel your love for him. "Ow?" You started laughing.

"How does it feel?" You asked with a smirk. You left a hickey on his torso and then you gently bit his side.

"Oh, you don't know what's coming for you-" He kneeled on the bed while you backed up against the frame. Bucky grabbed your ankles and pulled you towards him while you giggled.

"Nuh huh." You pushed your foot sole against his chest as you grinned.

"You evil little-" Bucky spread your legs and then leaned to tower you. "Tell me babydoll, what's stopping me right now from taking you?" He asked you while his flesh hand made its way between your legs.

"Nothing." You blushed as you stared into his eyes. "Hhhn...~" You gasped quietly and closed your eyes when you felt his fingers carefully spread your slit. The winter soldier leaned back and then he spread one of your thighs further with his metal hand while his flesh one was teasing you. Suddenly he stopped and he got off the bed. "W-What?" You asked in confusion.

"I'm gonna take a shower, brush my teeth and then I'm gonna fuck your brains out." You brought your hands to your mouth as your eyes widened in astonishment. You were as red as a beet. You regained your senses while Bucky was stripping in front of you before going into the bathroom and then you spoke.

"You got 5 minutes, Bucky." You challenged him. He gave you one last look before closing the bathroom door. You laid on the bed and sighed deeply. You were a bit frustrated but hopefully your boyfriend would be very quick.

You thought about everything he was going to do to you and you couldn't help growing more excited so naturally your hand found its way between your legs. You let out a quiet gasp when your fingers brushed against your clit. It felt different than when it was Bucky touching you but it wasn't bad either. You started blushing in shame and then you removed your hand. You convinced yourself to be patient, it was only five minutes...

Thankfully you heard the water stop and two minutes later the winter soldier came out. You started grinning as he made his way towards you, he crawled on top of your body and finally your lips met again. You wrapped your arms around Bucky's neck and kissed him deeply while he put his around your back. You two hummed happily as you kissed, it's been a really long time.

"I love you so much, doll." Bucky breathed against your lips and you couldn't help grinning as you tenderly stroked his cheek with your hand.

"Kiss me again like you do." You requested him.

"Everything my babydoll wants." He smirked as he caressed your waist before catching your mouth with his again. He ran his tongue on your lower lip and when you parted them he searched for yours inside your mouth. Your tongues danced sensually against each other while your hands caressed your bodies.

"Bucky, I want you so badly..." You whined against his mouth.

"I can tell, my love." Bucky smirked as he suddenly touched your pussy with his flesh hand. "You're so wet."

"Then please take care of me." You blushed. The winter soldier laid on the bed next to you and then when he spoke a chill ran down your spine.

"Sit on my face." The knot in your lower stomach tightened.

"W-What?" You asked with a red face.

"You heard me." Bucky smirked.

"Are you crazy?" Your eyes widened. "I'm not gonna do that, I'm way too heavy and I don't wanna break your neck or worse, choke you." You let out.

"Ok, first of all that sounded very hot-" You rolled your eyes. "And second I'll be fine, you're not really sitting on my face, just spread your legs above me."

"Oh my God..." You brought your hands to your face.

"I promise you it's just gonna feel good." You gulped as you thought quickly. That seemed a bit too much, you weren't that bold and the position was kinda embarrassing... "Doll, if you don't come here right now I'm going downstairs." Bucky smirked.

"God, you're so mean." You said to him.

"Come on, try it. If you don't like it we can still stop but I know that once I'll start you won't get off me."

"You sound awfully confident in yourself." You raised one eyebrow.

"I've seen what my tongue can do to y-

"B-Bucky!" You were so embarrassed. "God, fine. Just... shut up." You said as you started approaching him. He chuckled slightly.

"Put your knees on each side of my head." You breathed deeply before you hid your flustered face with one hand. "You're so adorable." He let out a little laugh.

"And you dare say it's Nat who has a bad influence on me." You muttered. "Ow-" You had finally positioned yourself above his head and Bucky playfully bit the inside of your thigh before soothing the pain with a kiss and his tongue.

"Lower yourself a bit." Bucky put his hands around your thighs and then you did as he said. You gulped, you could feel his breath tickling your sensitive skin. "Why are you shaking, you're fine babydoll."

"I-I'm nervous obviously!" You let out. "I-I've never done this and I-I feel exposed..."

"I promise you're gonna feel good." Bucky reassured you.

"Well stop talking and just st- Hhh! B-Bucky!" You closed your eyes and threw your head back when he licked a long stripe along your slit. You covered your mouth with your hand. The winter soldier didn't lose any time teasing you, he separated your slit with his fingers and then his mouth closed on your clit. He harshly sucked on it before soothing it with rapid licks. "O-Oh my God..!"

"You taste so sweet-" He breathed against your pussy before licking you again. His tongue circled your bundle of nerves and then he sucked on it again making you moan louder each time. "Do you want to get off me?" Bucky smirked.

"N-No..." You admitted. The winter soldier chuckled slightly and then he started teasing your entrance with his tongue. His hands rubbed your thighs and your hips until they stopped at your butt. Bucky fondled your buttcheeks as he licked you making you squirm above him. "B-Bucky..." You breathed in pleasure. It was too much, it felt so good. Bucky knew your body like the back of his hand and especially all the tricks to make you reach your orgasm. You clinged onto the bed frame with one hand and the other went between your legs to pull on your boyfriend's hair.

"Hnng!" Bucky groaned. You knew he loved it as well.

"Ow!" As if to challenge you the winter soldier bit your thigh again. You knew each other's kinks and you both liked to play. You giggled slightly when he eased the pain, he was tickling you.

"I love when you laugh." Bucky smiled after he released your clit with a suction sound.

"I love you, Bucky." You blushed. You took his hands and tangled your fingers with his. The winter soldier squeezed your hands gently before he licked and sucked you again. He definitively planned on making you come on his face. "Hhhn!" You raised your hips a little when it was too much but Bucky decided otherwise. He let go of your hands and gripped your hips tightly to keep you in place. "B-Bucky..!" You held onto the bed frame and threw your head back before letting out a long moan.

"Hmmm." You heard him hum between your thighs. Bucky gave your clit fast licks, he started rubbing you with his nose as well and soon enough the knot in your abdomen broke.

"Bucky! Ahhh! F-Fuck..!" You were feeling so good you couldn't help your hips grinding against your boyfriend's face. His metal hand had a death grip on your hip you couldn't raise yourself up. You held strongly onto the bed frame as your eyes rolled back inside your head and your orgasm finally washed over your body. Bucky kept licking you and lapped up all your juices, he knew you were gone when he felt your thighs tremble against his palms and next to his head. Your body went limp and you dropped next to him on the bed.

"Shh, babydoll." Bucky chuckled lowly after he turned to look at you and caress your hip with his hand, your thighs were still twitching and your eyes were closed as you panted. The winter soldier leaned above your face and kissed you softly. You could taste yourself on his lips but you didn't care, as you kissed him back you felt yourself calm down a little.

"P-Please-" You whimpered.

"Shh, I know what you need. I've got you." Bucky approached your body and then he wrapped you between his arms to snuggle. He knew you liked and _needed_ to be held after this, always. You held onto his bicep with your hand and your legs tangled with his his.

"I love you." You whispered softly after you calmed down a bit.

"Me too, doll." Bucky smiled. "I told you you'd sit on my face one day."

"You're crazy." You let out with a little giggle before sticking your body to his. You stared into his eyes lovingly while your hand gently caressed his torso. You traced his abs with your fingers and then went further down to trace the V of his hips. You leaned to kiss Bucky and then you gently grasped his dick.

"Hmm!" The winter soldier quietly gasped against your lips. He moved and went on his fours above you while you kept pumping him but you pushed him back with your hand and made him lay down again.

"Stay." You said to him as **you** went on your fours this time. You buried your head in the crook of his neck and kissed his skin there while you kept touching him.

"Doll..." Bucky moaned and the sound went straight to your lower abdomen. When you left a hickey on his neck you started going further down to leave several more on his torso until you reached his crotch and then you put him into your mouth. "Oh, fuck..." Bucky breathed.

"Hmm..." You hummed as you sucked him and the vibrations made your boyfriend crazy. His flesh hand went onto your head and then he applied small pressure onto it to make you take more of his length inside your mouth. His tip was rubbing against the back of your mouth but it wasn't uncomfortable yet. Bucky's thighs were twitching and his sounds were getting louder, it made you happy to pleasure him. You bobbed your head faster and then brought one of yours hands to his testicles to massage them. You held your breath and then you went even deeper on him, you were absolutely deep-throating your boyfriend. For Bucky it was too much, he held you head and groaned as he finally came in your throat. You coughed and started choking.

"Crap!" Bucky let go of your head and when you leaned back you brought your hand to your mouth.

"O-Oh God, I swallowed it..." You realized, you blushed in embarrassment.

"Doll, I-I'm so sorry-" Bucky sat up and took your free hand in his metal one. "You were just... too good..." He let out. You raised your head to look at him when you heard your boyfriend let out a chuckle he was trying so hard to hold back. You couldn't help your lips curving into a smile as well and then you both started to laugh. "I love you so much." Bucky grinned before leaning on you and catching your lips with his for a kiss. He could taste himself on your tongue but he couldn't care less about it.

"Me too, Bucky." You said happily as you wrapped your arms around his neck. "Now if I remember, someone said they were going to fuck my brains out, hm?" You smirked.

"Hmm, I do recall hearing that as well." Bucky licked your lips in a playful way before inversing your positions and laying you on your back on the bed.

"Please, fuck me." You pleaded him after spreading your thighs in front of him. Bucky leaned to put a kiss on top of your slit then he towered above you and took his dick in his hand to guide it to your entrance. "O-Oh my God, finally..." You wrapped one arm around his neck and the other went to his back while you closed your eyes.

"It always feels so fucking good inside of you." Bucky let out.

"Bucky, I'm begging you please, start moving..." You bit onto your lower lip after you opened your eyes and looked at his face. The winter soldier thrusted his hips against yours and you moaned. He gripped your right leg with his metal hand and put it against his hip before he thrusted again. "H-Holy shit..."

"Is my babydoll feeling good?" Bucky whispered to your ear with a smirk.

"Yes. Yes, please keep going-" You breathed. You ran your hands on his back and torso before gripping his muscled arms that you loved so much. "Oh my God, Bucky!" He pushed his fists on the mattress next to your body and literally rammed hard inside of you. Your moans got louder everytime he pushed his length back deep inside of you.

"Tell me again-" Bucky panted above you. "Tell me how much you want me."

"So, so badly Bucky!" You said. "I hated being sick and- Hhh!" Oh fuck, he brushed against one of your soft spots. "Not being able to touch you, to kiss you... I-I hated it." You revealed. You brought your hands to his face and stared into his eyes. "You make me feel so good. I love you, Bucky." The winter soldier leaned on you and kissed you passionately while he continued thrusting inside of you. You pulled his hair as you kissed and he bit your tongue. "Ow!"

"Sorry, doll." He grinned. He was absolutely not sorry at all.

"Make me come and I might forgive you." You teased playfully.

"Have I ever let you unsatisfied?" He asked with a smirk. Bucky gripped your hips before he started pounding hard inside of you.

"B-Bucky! F-Fuck!" You threw your head back on the pillow as you closed your eyes and moaned even louder. Your boyfriend buried his head in the crook of your neck to kiss you there.

"Hold me like you do." He requested you. "Are you close?"

"Hmm." You nodded and wrapped your arms under his, you held him so closely and tightly your chest was squeezed against his. "Yes!" You confirmed. Bucky wrapped you between his arms as well and then he slammed his hips deeper and faster against yours until his movements started getting slower and you heard him groan next to your neck. You came at the same time, Bucky could tell because as always he felt you tremble against his body and also your voice died out in your throat. You both panted as you continued to hold onto each other, not wanting to let go yet. Bucky kissed your cheek before pulling out and laying next to you on the bed.

"Come here." He opened his arms and smiled at you. You snuggled up against him and held onto his body. "I love you." You turned your head to look at him and smiled back.

  
  


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"You're late." Tony said when you and Bucky entered the kitchen for breakfast.

"Won't be the first time." You replied. The winter soldier looked at you and smiled while he went behind the counter.

"Your voice is better." Nat noticed when you took a seat around the table.

"Hmm, I'm not sick anymore." You cheered happily.

"Ah, that's good to hear." Steve said and Bucky came back to sit next to you.

"It was about time, it was horrible." You added. "I felt tired all the time."

"Is that why you were late this morning?" Tony asked. You blushed instantly.

"Yeah..." You lowered your head. Nat and Steve crossed eyes with Bucky and he slowly shaked his head with an amused smirk on his face. Nat's lips curved into a small smile and Steve raised his eyes to the sky.

"[Y/N], you must need some nutrients after... staying in bed for so long." The redhaired woman teased and handed you the bread basket.

"Uh, thank you." Your brows furrowed in confusion. You didn't know what she was playing at but you took it anyway.

"Good morning." You all turned your heads towards the entrance when you heard the deep voice.

"Hey, Thor." Steve greeted him.

"How are you up so early?" You asked him.

"I just woke up." He replied as he sat across you. You didn't want to ask him personal questions in front of everyone so you just nodded. The God of thunder would talk to you if he needed to.

"Here." Bucky handed you a glass of milk with a smile.

"Thank you, Bucky." You smiled back at him as you took it.

"So, I wanted to ask you all..." Nat started with a smirk. "How do you feel about going to the beach this afternoon?" Oh no... You tried to make yourself look small on your chair. You were comfortable with your friends the Avengers and showing your skin around the winter soldier only but that was it... Your confidence just wasn't up there yet.

"I don't know, won't it be crowded?" Steve asked.

"Who do you think we are? We'll just book the VIP area." She replied to him. "Only celebrities and rich people go there so it won't be crowded."

"Well, in that case..." The captain said. "I'm in."

"Don't look at me like this..." You said to Nat **and** Bucky. "I-I really don't know..."

"Come, it will be fun-" Your boyfriend tried to convince you. "And I'll be here with you. We'll all be." He said to reassure you.

"You?" Steve asked Thor. He shrugged.

"Okay." The Asgardian replied.

"Yeah, I don't know either..." Bruce added.

"We have work to do." Tony explained.

"Oh c'mon, it's time you both go out." The redhaired woman said. "You're always confined in that lab, you need some fresh air." She was right.

"I'll only come if Tony and Bruce come as well." You said with a little smile.

"Well, I can't say no now, can I?" Tony smiled as he crossed eyes with you.

"Bruce?" You asked. The doctor sighed deeply.

"Alright. If everyone is in, I'll come as well." He gave up.

"Yay!" Nat cheered. Bucky leaned on you and kissed your cheek.

"I can't wait to see you in a swimsuit." He whispered to your ear and you blushed.

"See? This is what makes me **not** want to go. Don't get your hopes up." You said to him.

"You'd look gorgeous in a trash bag, you're beautiful." Bucky smiled at you tenderly.

"You make me so tired." You couldn't help your lips curving into a small smile though. You leaned on him and put a quick kiss on his lips. He took your hand under the table and held it on his thigh.

"It's gonna be great." Nat added happily. She was really excited to go with all of you at the beach.

"I feel like it's been forever since we haven't done something together, just the 7 of us." Steve smiled in nostalgia.

"Brings back memories." You said.

"Like what?" Bucky asked.

"The first game we had." You replied. "Never thought I would have fun with a group of people I barely met." You bit onto your lower lip as you rememberd.

"Sometimes it feels like yesterday." The winter soldier said. "When I first put my lips on your neck." You blushed as you looked into his eyes with a shy smile on your face.

"I love you." You said discreetly to him as you squeezed his hand under the table.

  
  


After your breakfast you got up and approached Thor before grabbing his arm.

"Come with me." You said to him. He raised his head and looked at you with a confused look but decided to follow you anyway. You took the elevator with him and decided to go on the roof of the tower to be alone.

"What?" He asked you after you sat on the border. It had a fence so you weren't afraid to fall over.

"No, I'm the one who's going to ask you what." You started. "You tell me. What's wrong?" You gestured him to sit next to you.

"There's nothing-"

"Tsk." You clicked your tongue. "Come on, sit." The Asgardian sighed but finally approached to sit next to you. "You've been getting up earlier, you're less lively and loud- And yes, I do miss it-" You looked at him with a smile. "Everytime we do activities I see you on your own..." You gently put your hand on his arm. "Thor, I'm worried about you." You finally revealed.

"You have nothing to be worried about." He said.

"But I do. You're my best friend and I feel like you're not doing well. I want you to be happy again." You kept looking at him but he was ignoring your gaze. "Please tell me what's wrong. Is it your father?"

"Yes..." The God of thunder revealed. "It's been months now and he hasn't gotten any better." You didn't interrupt him and let him speak. "I feel useless. Heimdall says that my mother and Loki are doing well so it's useless for me to go to Asgard. I'm useless on Asgard, I can't help my father. I'm useless on Earth, I wasn't able to protect you and I haven't been able to tell Loki about what happened."

"Thor, stop. We talked about this." You said firmly. "You did help me. You're the one who got me out of the cell. Back then I told you that I didn't think I'd be able to tell you how I felt when I heard you and saw you but I'm gonna try to because I feel like you didn't understand." You took one of his hands in both of yours. "When I was in that cell I was terrified. Rumlow had just slapped my cheek open and stabbed my ankle and after that one of his men dragged me by my hair downstairs. I was pretty sure I was going to die of blood loss and pain. I think only 20 minutes passed by from the moment I was thrown in the cell and the moment you found me. When you called out my name..." Small tears appeard in the corner of your eyes. "It's as if I was drowning and suddenly I got a huge load of oxygen in my lungs. You-" You squeezed his hand. "Thor, when I finally saw you I felt as light as a feather. Suddenly all my pain, all my fears, all my anxiety, it all disappeard when you crossed eyes with me. You were there for me, you came to save me." Your brows furrowed a bit when a drop of water landed on the back of your hand. You raised your head to look at the God of thunder and your eyes widened when you saw that he was crying. You smiled slightly and wrapped your arms around the Asgardian's body. "Please, I never want to hear you say that you're useless." You said as you gently rubbed his back. "And don't bring up the fact that you got shot. The end of the story is that Rumlow is dead, you, I and our friends are all alive and well. He lost, we won." You said. "And about your father you said it yourself. He doesn't have war injuries that I can just heal, so what do you expect to be able to do to help him?" You asked him after you released each other. "I understand you feel helpless and you're worried about your family but that doesn't make you useless at all." You brought your hands to his face and gently wiped his tears. "I think me and your friend Heimdall need to speak, he needs to stop using the U word around you." You giggled slightly and you saw Thor's lips curve into a small smile.

"Loki was such an idiot for letting you go." Thor said to you.

"I can't believe you just said that." You lowered your head as you lightly chuckled at his idiocy. "Promise me." You asked him as raised your fist.

"Promise what?" You rolled your eyes in amusement.

"You won't call yourself use- the U word anymore and that next time you feel down you will come to me instead of shutting yourself. Give me your pinky." You said as you looked at his hand and gestured him to raise his fist as well. He sighed deeply before finally doing as you said.

"I promise you." You pinky promised and smiled at each other.

"Thank you." You said to him.

"No, I thank you." Thor said before leaning on you and putting a kiss on your forehead. You blushed slightly as you realized what he did.

"A-Anyway, I should go back downstairs. Bucky must be searching for me." You got up.

"[Y/N], I really appreciate what you did and... always do for me." Thor added.

"Friends support and help each other." You reminded him with a smile. You had told him that once. "See you later, Thor." You waved at him before leaving. He waved back at you and decided to stay on the roof to think.

"...Ah, I'm screwed." The God of thunder lowered his head after he sighed deeply. Your person wouldn't leave his mind... And now his heart.

  
  


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"Where have you been?" You found team cap in the living space after you exited the elevator. Bucky was laying on a couch and across him were Steve and Nat on another couch.

"With Thor on the roof." You replied after you laid on your boyfriend. He wrapped his arms around your waist and held you tightly.

"What's up?" Nat asked you.

"Well, you all probably noticed... He's not doing well and it worried me." You said.

"I'm fascinated by your will to always want to help everyone around you." Bucky said to you.

"He's not just everyone, he's my best friend." You reminded your boyfriend. "Thor did a lot for me, if I can help him in any way I will." You said.

"You're really kind, [Y/N]." Steve smiled at you.

"I'm dating the Goddess of kindness." Bucky leaned and put a kiss on your chin. You looked at him with a smile on your face, your heart was beating so fast inside your chest. "What are you thinking about in that pretty head of yours?"

"How lucky I am to have you." You replied and it knocked the air out of your boyfriend's lungs.

"We've come a long way." Nat raised one eyebrow with a smile. You leaned on Bucky and left a trail of soft kisses on his face, he laughed happily under you and it warmed your chest. His laugh was one of your favorite sounds in the world.

"What were you guys talking about before I came?" You asked team cap.

"Bucky was telling us how he couldn't wait to go to the beach with you." Nat replied.

"Oh my God..." You let out as you hid your face on his chest.

"What?" He asked with an amused chuckle.

"I feel like you're getting your hopes up." You said.

"You don't even know what I'm expecting." Bucky said.

"Alright, how do you think it's gonna go?" You asked him.

"We'll go there, we'll have a swim- No wait. Before our swim I'll put sunscreen on you then you put it on me-" You started giggling a bit. "After our swim we can take a walk on the sand, separate ourselves from the group a bit-"

"How kind." Nat interrupted.

"Bucky..." You rolled your eyes before smiling.

"If we find a nice hidden spot maybe I can do y-" You shoved your hand against his mouth and closed your eyes as you sighed deeply.

"You're out of your mind." You said to him as you tried getting off him but he kept you in place with his arms around your waist.

"Then we'll probably get hungry so we'll share an ice cream cone or whatever you want." Bucky grinned as he looked at you.

"That's such a plan you got there." You giggled.

"Have you ever swum? Or is that a first time too?" Bucky asked you.

"Used to... a really long, long time ago." You replied. "I think I still lived in the village." Your brows furrowed as you rememberd. "I was a kid." You added.

"Why did you never do it again?" Steve asked you.

"Well... You know, the mockery started around there. I was around 9 or 10 years old. Sparing you all the mean nicknames but the one that came the most was being called a whale." You smiled a bit sadly as you rememberd. "One day I just stopped taking off my clothes. I sat on the sand and watched the other kids have fun." Bucky gently caressed your hair and put a kiss against your cheek.

"No one said anything?" Nat asked you.

"You mean defend me?" You let out a dry chuckle. "Quite the opposite actually, they joined in on the mockery and laughed at the mean nicknames they gave me." You said.

"You know, I'm thinking maybe Thor was right. We should go back to that village and kick some ass." Bucky said. You leaned on your boyfriend to put a chaste kiss on his mouth.

"I love you but it's not necessary. I haven't seen any of them for like the past 13 years. I'd rather forget my past." You said.

"I don't understand how people can be so mean for no reason." Steve said with furrowed brows.

"You should know about it, you used to get your ass kicked all the time." Bucky playfully threw at his best friend.

"They like picking on weaker people, it made them feel stronger. No offense to you both." Nat said to you and Steve.

"None taken." You replied at the same time and smiled slightly at each other as you crossed eyes.

"Aw, my babydoll." Bucky hugged you tighter when he noticed you started tearing up a bit.

"I-I'm fine." You said as you wiped your tears. "It just-" You breathed deeply. "It all came back suddenly. It was really awful back then." You said.

"Jokes on all of them now. Steve is a national hero and you're a Goddess." Bucky said to you and it made you smile.

"I love you so much." You said to him.

"Did you hear that? A Goddess loves me." He joked and you couldn't help laughing. You leaned onto him to whisper something to his ear.

"Had it not been for the fact that we're not alone in this room I would've asked you to do me on this couch." Suddenly Bucky moved under you and it surprised you.

"We have to get ready for the beach." The winter soldier announced.

"But it's just 10? And we're going after lunch." Steve's brows furrowed in confusion.

"We have a lot of things to take care of, swimsuits, towels, sunscreen. We better start now." Bucky got up and gave you his hand to help you stand as well. You blushed in shame as you looked at him. It was your fault though, you shouldn't have whispered that to him.

"Alright, see you later." The captain said. You and your boyfriend left the room and then the super soldier turned his head towards the redhaired woman. "They... That was an excuse right? They're not really going to prepare for the beach."

"You're less slow than I imagined." Nat chuckled lowly. Steve raised his eyes to the sky and sighed deeply.

  
  


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"Oh God, it's so warm." You complained after you got out of the car.

"It's not that crowded, it's nice." Nat said next to you as she faced forward.

"Let me get that." Bucky took your bag when you were about to put your hand on it.

"Thank you." You smiled at him.

Steve opened the trunk and with Bucky they took what you needed. Two minutes later Tony arrived with his car and his team as well. As always you had to travel in two separate cars since you were a lot.

"[Y/N], come with me." Nat said to you as she handed you her hand. "Let's find a nice spot while the guys carry everything." She smiled at you.

"Okay." You glanced at the winter soldier before taking the black widow's hand and then you made your way towards the sea.

"Damn, it's burning." Nat had removed her flip flops before re putting them on after taking a few steps on the sand.

"I had forgotten the salty smell." You commentated as well. "The waves are looking great though."

You walked a few meters until you found a nice spot. There weren't people around you and you even had some space if you wanted to play ball or something. Nat waved at Steve and the boys to gesture them to come where you were.

"Careful." Thor jabbed the parasol in the sand.

"Oh my God." You crouched down. "You almost killed this crab." You said to him.

"Ew! Where?" Nat turned around and started looking down.

"He's gone in the sand." You replied with a disappointed look.

"She's so adorable, I'm gonna melt." Bucky said to Steve with a grin.

"I think the sun's getting to your head." The captain joked.

"Give me that." You grabbed a bag from Bruce that contained towels for everybody, you started laying them on the sand so you all could get settled on them. "Thank you guys for carrying everything." You smiled at them.

"It's nice being praised for once." Tony glared at Nat but she ignored him. She wasn't even paying attention.

"Well, this is starting to look like something." Steve said as he looked at you guys spot. Suddenly all the six Avengers started taking their clothes off in front of you and you couldn't help checking them out. You were baffled. How come everyone in this goddamn team had abs?? The men wore swim trunks and Nat wore a one piece swimsuit, with her perfect body you wondered why she didn't wear a sexier bikini, she could clearly afford it. Even Tony and Bruce who were older and you secretly hoped would help you feel comfortable with having a less shredded body than their teammates looked hot as well. Guess it really helps to be on the fighting side. You started thinking that maybe going to the training room with Bucky to actually exercize and not drool at him would do you some good. You wouldn't feel so insecure at the moment. Wait a minute... Bucky didn't remove his shirt. You started looking away and pretend you were busy with your stuff when you noticed him coming towards you.

"Stop overthinking, you're hot." He sat down on your towel next to you.

"You really can read me like a book, huh?" You smiled slightly at him. "L-Listen, I-"

"Shh." Bucky leaned on you and kissed you softly. "I didn't ask for anything, did I?"

"Thank you." You brought your hand to his cheek and caressed him while looking into his eyes. You turned your head and saw the others starting to put sunscreen on. They were talking about going into the water soon. You wore a one piece swimsuit under your clothes as well but you really didn't feel confident enough to reveal it right now. Even if you weren't going to swim you wanted Bucky to have fun. You wanted him to join the others for a swim. "Do you want me to put that sunscreen on you?" You asked him with a small smile. "Like you mentioned this morning?"

"I dream about you putting sunscreen on me and then we'd both go swimming but-" He lowered his head. Your brows furrowed a bit.

"Bucky? What's wrong?" This time you sensed it, there was something else.

"Let's go!" You heard the others before they started running towards the ocean leaving you and your boyfriend alone.

"Is it because of me?" You asked. "Even if I don't want to swim I don't want you to not have fun, you can go with them." You said to reassure him.

"It's never gonna be because of you." He took your hand and put a kiss on the back of it.

"Then... what?" You dared to ask. He lowered his head and sighed deeply before replying.

"Maybe you're not the only one feeling insecure." Bucky finally revealed. Your eyes widened.

"W-What?" You were confused. "Is it because-" You took his metal hand in yours. "Of your arm?" He nodded as he kept his head down, avoiding your eyes. "Bucky..." You kneeled in front of him and took him in your arms. "You have nothing to be ashamed of, nothing to hide. You're the most handsome and hottest man I've ever seen." You smiled as you held him tightly against you. "I'm sorry I had no idea..."

"I never told you about it." He said after he let out a small dry chuckle.

"Hey, I understand." You leaned back and put your palms against his face. "It's me." You smiled at him.

"Kiss me." He whispered in front of your face and you did. You kissed him passionately and ran your fingers through his brown hair while squeezing yourself against him. You took a deep breath after you broke the kiss and then you put your hands on the hem of your shirt and raised it to take it off. "What are you doing?" Bucky asked you with widened eyes.

"I want to put sunscreen on you and then I want to go swimming with you." You said to the winter soldier while you unbuttoned your skirt and then you slided it off your legs.

"Doll-" Bucky was out of breath. "You're so beautiful, I'm so lucky." He wrapped his arms around your waist and tackled you on the towel. You giggled as he left a trail of kisses from your neck to your cleavage. "You look so good, I want to do you right there, right now."

"B-Bucky!" You gasped. "We already did it twice today and the others are waiting for us." You stopped him.

"But it's calling me. Your nipples are poking against the fabric and I can see the line of your-" You slapped your hand against his mouth.

"You make me so tired." You sighed and he chuckled. Then he gave you his hands and helped you sit again.

"Turn around, I'm gonna put sunscreen on you." He said.

"Are you sure that's a good idea? Don't travel your hands where they shouldn't Bucky. Don't get... excited." You blushed. "Ow!"

"I love you so much." He kept laughing after he playfully bit your shoulder. Bucky grabbed the sunscreen bottle from your bag and then he dropped some of its content onto his palm before spreading it on you. "Lower your straps."

"Oh fuck, it's cold." He massaged your shoulders after you lowered your straps. "You're tickling me, Bucky." You giggled when you felt him leave a few kisses on your nape. He came in front of you and started spreading more on your cleavage and arms as well.

"And... here!" Bucky exclaimed after he spread some on your face. "I need to take care of that nose of yours." He grinned happily.

"Thank you." You said to him when he was done. You put your straps back properly on yourself and then you looked at him. "I'm not swimming unless you come with me."

"Yeah-" He sighed. "I understood that." Then he proceeded to remove his shirt and you grinned happily.

"I'm proud of you." You leaned on him and kissed his mouth passionately.

" **I'm** proud of you, doll." Bucky took your hand in his. "Thank you."

"You're the one who makes me feel confident everyday." You wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him again. "Alright, give me that." You glanced at the bottle after you released him. He handed you the sunscreen and then you went to kneel behind him. Bucky smiled tenderly and closed his eyes when he felt you leave a trail of soft kisses at the base where his skin and the metal connected. You loved every part of him.

"If you keep kissing me I'm afraid we're not gonna join the others." He joked.

"I love you." You breathed against his skin. You leaned back and opened the sunscreen bottle to drop some of its content onto your palm. You ran your hands on Bucky's back, it was muscled, his skin was warm and soft, all of him was perfect. You went on his side and started spreading sunscreen on his flesh arm as well. "Bucky..." You giggled when he started flexing to make his bicep bigger.

"I bet you're enjoying this more than me." He chuckled.

"I am." You replied seriously and it surprised him but he was amused. "I love your strong arms." You praised him. "I love all of you, you're perfect." You gasped when Bucky seized your waist and brought you on his lap. "Oh my God, Bucky, there's people around." You blushed and panicked a little when he started fondling your buttcheeks. Though it didn't feel bad so you let him continue have his fun while you spread a bit of sunscreen on his face. "I never noticed before but you have freckles, that's so adorable."

"They only appear when I'm under the sun." He explained.

"How are you so perfect?" You asked lovingly.

"You like them?" He asked you with a confused look.

"Hmm, I think they're really beautiful." You replied with a smile as you spread more product on his torso.

"God, I'm so in love with you." Bucky breathed out as he stared into your eyes.

"And me with you." You leaned onto each other's faces and kissed deeply. "C'mon, we're good. Let's go join the others." You both got up.

"Give me your hand." You stared at him in confusion but did as he said. Bucky made you do a little twirl on yourself. "You look gorgeous." He said to you with a grin. You blushed slightly, you felt a bit weird wearing a swimsuit especially since there were other people around.

"Thank you." You replied in a soft voice before biting onto your lower lip. You started walking towards the ocean but suddenly you stopped. "Damn, Nat was right. It's burning." You whined.

"All you had to do was ask, babydoll." Bucky smirked before coming behind you and picking you up bridal style.

"Waah!" You gasped. "Bucky, you don't have to!" You wrapped your arms around his neck. He laughed as he ran with you in his arms towards the water. "Oh God, Bucky you're not dropping me. I bet it's freezing." The others started waving at you two when they noticed you finally arrive. "Bucky!" And he did it. The winter soldier entered the water with you and you got swallowed by a huge wave. You were entirely drenched in seconds.

"Doll, are you okay?" He dared to ask after **he** did this. Bucky expected you to be mad at him but you were laughing. You were actually having fun. You wrapped your arms around him and squeezed him tight before making him lean on you to kiss. You released your boyfriend and took a few steps back before splashing his face with the salty water. "Oh, you want to play?" He challenged you. He ran after you while you tried to get away from him but he was faster. Bucky picked you up and dropped you in the water again. You tackled his legs and made him fall as well. You were both laughing as you played like children. You were really glad everyone convinced you to come.

  
  


You continued playing with your boyfriend for some time until the others joined you both as well. Steve and Bucky challenged each other to a little swimming race and during that time you were with the others. You noticed Nat being very friendly with Bruce. You were glad your friends were having fun as well. Tony got out of the water after some time, he said he was tired and so he went to lay on his towel.

"Aah! Thor, put me down immediately!" You laughed when he picked you up and put you on his shoulder.

"Beware, there's a huge wave coming." He warned you and your eyes widened.

"Then why are you walking towards it??" You started panicking a bit.

"Don't worry, nothing will happen to you." The God of thunder reassured you and laughed as he put you back on your feet.

"Oh God, it's coming and it's too late to get away. Thor, don't let me go!" You jumped on him and clinged on his body like a koala on a tree while he wrapped one arm around you. You pinched your nose and closed your eyes before the wave finally befell on your forms.

"Are you okay?" He asked with a chuckle as you coughed.

"I think I drank some water." You made a disgusted face. "It's so salty and gross." Suddenly you realized you were still clinging on him. Your hands were on his naked and muscled body. You let him go and stood on your own feet as you blushed a bit. "I-I'm sorry." You blurted out.

"There's no harm." The Asgardian smiled at you, he still had his arm wrapped around you.

"Hhh!" You froze before starting to move around.

"What's wrong?" Thor asked you in worry.

"S-Something touched my foot!" You stared at the water but you couldn't see anything. Suddenly Thor went under the water and when he stood back on his feet with _what_ touched you you facepalmed.

"It was just seaweed." He couldn't help laughing.

"Y-Yeah, well, it could've been something dangerous and scary." You defended yourself. "Stop laughing!" You splashed his face with water. "Oh no, don't you dare-" You took a step back. "Thor, no!" The God of thunder picked you up again and you couldn't help laughing. He dropped you into the water and you both laughed. You were having a lot of fun with your best friend.

"I love spending time with you, [Y/N]." He suddenly let out and you couldn't help feeling warm in your chest.

"Really?" You smiled a bit emotionally. You stepped back towards him and then you hugged Thor. "I'm really glad, it makes me happy you say that." The Asgardian put a kiss on top of your head before you released him, you didn't mind.

"Hey, so who won?" Thor asked Steve when he came towards you both. Bucky was just behind him so you left your best friend's side and went next to your boyfriend's.

"It was a tie." The captain replied.

"Maybe we can help you untie it with a game of beachvolley?" Nat and Bruce joined you four as well.

"Oh, I'm game." Bucky replied instantly.

"It sounds fun, I'm in as well." Thor added.

"I wanna play too!" You said excitedly.

"Alright, let's go then." Steve concluded and you all got out of the water.

"I wanna have a drink first." Nat said. "It's really warm."

"Me too, it was good playing in the water but I'm a bit tired." You said.

"It's fine, we brought snacks." Steve said. "We can eat a bit before playing."

"You had fun?" Bucky asked you. You nodded happily with a big smile on your face.

"It was awesome." You replied.

"Do you know how cute you look with your hair all wet and that swimsuit sticking to your body?" The winter soldier asked you with half lidded eyes.

"Bucky, you have no idea what your wet body illuminated by the sunlight does to _me_." You teased. "That's an image that wouldn't leave my brain since we were at the cabin and you swam in that lake." You added.

"You got mad at me for swimming there." His brows furrowed as he suddenly rememberd.

"I got mad at you for swimming in there naked and for being reckless." You corrected him. You sat on your towel and Bucky came next to you.

"There's sandwiches, snacks and juices so help yourself guys." Steve announced to you all.

"We're gonna play beachvolley next, do you wanna join us Tony?" You asked him.

"Eh, I'll pass. I'll be the referee if you want." He replied to you.

"Okay." You smiled at him.

"Here you go." Bucky went to get your food and your drink.

"Thank you, I love you." You kissed his cheek when he sat back next to you. "Oh my God, your freckles are really there now. I have to take a picture." You put your food down in front of you and then leaned to grab your phone inside your bag.

"I'm only taking this picture if you're in it with me." He said.

"That's so unfair to ask me this when **you** take pictures of me while I'm sleeping." You rolled your eyes.

"Yes but I'm awake right now and you were not back then." He chuckled. "Come on, take it with me and then send it to my phone. I want a picture of you looking as cute as ever at the beach too."

"Fine." You gave up. You giggled slightly when an idea came inside your head. You leaned on Bucky and kissed his cheek then you took the picture.

"That's unfair, I can't see your face." He complained after you both checked the picture.

"Sucks to be you." You mocked. "I can see your freckles." You smiled happily as you stared at the picture.

"Whatever makes you happy." He sighed.

"You do, you make me happy." You said before catching him by surprise and putting a kiss on his lips.

"Don't make me take you somewhere else and away from everybody." He warned you with a smirk.

"That'd be mean of you, I'm hungry." You said with a fake sad face and then you bit onto your sandwich.

"I'm craving a different kind of food." He said when you pointed the sandwich towards his mouth to feed him too.

"Yes but for now this is all you'll get." You smiled at him. Bucky finally bit the sandwich in resignation.

  
  


After you all ate and rested on your towels you finally decided to play that game of beachvolley.

"Alright, 3 against 3. I made the teams to balance you lot since not everyone has the same skills. No offense to you, sweetheart." Tony winked at you.

"None taken." You smiled.

"So, on the first team [Y/N] with Steve and Thor." Your team walked towards a side of the court someone had previously marked on the sand. "Second team is Natasha, Bucky and Bruce."

"I think it's well balanced." Steve said.

"Come on, you have a God on your side!" Nat complained.

"But my team has me." You said.

"You're perfect, babydoll!" Bucky shouted at you on the other side of the court with a grin.

"I love you, Bucky!" You shouted back as well. You loved him so much you didn't care if the others were around. You saw him blow a kiss at you and you couldn't help feeling really happy.

"I can't put Bucky and Steve on the same team since it's a revenge match between the two, you and [Y/N] are the only two women so you're in different teams and Thor and Steve's strength will balance with [Y/N]'s." Tony explained to Nat.

"C'mon, who cares?" Bucky asked her. "We're gonna win anyway." He grinned confidently.

"The losing team gets dares." Tony announced and Steve sighed. Really? This again? He thought.

The volley ball was finally being thrown in and the game started. Damn you didn't know running and moving in the sand could be so tiring. You fell a few times but so did the other Avengers as they tried to catch the ball. The points were tied to your surprise, even if you weren't that good of a player Steve and Thor were really going all out. You were thankful they never looked annoyed at you when you made them lose a few points.

"Out!" Tony shouted.

"Great, Bucky." Nat complained when he sent the ball flying far from the court behind your team.

"It's fine, I'll go get it!" You said to everybody while you started running towards where the ball was sent. It had landed next to a small group of young adults but thankfully it didn't land on them or on their stuff. You apologized for bothering and then bent over to pick it up.

"Ew, what's that?" One of the girls of the group let out. It was composed of two girls and two guys. The girls wore small bikinis and they were tanning on their towels while the guys were smoking.

"I thought whales were supposed to stay in the ocean." One of the guys said and then the four of them started laughing as they looked at you in disgust.

"I-I'm sorry..." You were in shock. Living in the tower actually made you forget how hostile the outside world had always been to you.

"Bucky, wait!" Steve tried to stop him when he noticed his best friend suddenly start running towards you.

"What's wrong??" Bruce asked. They all had their eyes fixed on your form waiting for you to come back with the ball.

"They're making fun of [Y/N]." The captain revealed before he and the others started running towards you two as well. He and Bucky had heard everything thanks to their super hearing abilities.

"What the fuck did you say to her?!" You didn't have time to blink suddenly you found your boyfriend at your side. He grabbed the guy who insulted you by the throat with his metal hand and lifted him off the sand. The girls started yelling and you grabbed Bucky's other arm.

"B-Bucky, it's fine! Drop him." You pleaded him. He turned his head to look at you and when he saw tears in your eyes his hold on the guy got tighter. The guy started scratching at Bucky's metal wrist with his hands but in vain, it did nothing.

"Let him go, you're choking him!" One of the girls shouted at your boyfriend.

"Bucky, please! I don't want you to get in trouble, drop him!" You begged him.

"Bucky, stop!" Steve came at your level and hit his best friend on the arm to make him drop the guy. He landed on the sand and started coughing while holding his throat between his hands.

"I'm gonna sue you!" One of the girls said to your boyfriend but Bucky kept his gaze on the guy on the ground. His eyes were cold and intimidating, it was even more terrifying than the day he glared at you at the cabin.

"Oh fuck, that's Tony Stark. Doesn't your dad work for him?" The other guy asked the girl who threatened Bucky. Her face got pale when she recognized him as well. All the Avengers had now joined you. You didn't care about what they talked about, you approached Bucky and hugged him tightly against you. The winter soldier started calming down when he felt your familiar warmth and smell. He carefully passed a hand on your hair and left a kiss on top of your head.

"Why don't we settle this with a game of beachvolley, huh?" Bruce proposed.

"Yes, I think that's a good idea." Thor said. He raised his arm and suddenly Mjolnir came flying through, the Asgardian closed his fist on the handle.

"What do you say? You guys wanna play against us?" Nat asked their group.

"What? C'mon, that's unfair. You guys are the goddamn Avengers." The non injured guy said.

"Yes, exactly." Tony spoke. "Next time you wanna beef with one of us remember you're against the goddamn Avengers." Your friends stood in front of you and Bucky.

"Apologize." Bucky suddenly spoke. He was looking at the three of them and then he lowered his gaze on the guy on the ground. It wasn't a request, it was an order.

"He won't repeat it." Steve said to them.

"I-I'm sorry." The guy on the ground let out in a raspy voice. Bucky glanced from him to the three others with a glare so cold it made them freeze.

"W-We're sorry as well." They said. The winter soldier put his arm over your shoulders and then made you turn around so you could walk away from them. The Avengers didn't add anything and so they walked away too.

"Are you okay, my love?" Bucky asked you in a soft voice suddenly and it surprised you. It had nothing to do with the voice he just used against those young adults.

"Hmm." You nodded.

"We're gonna take a walk." Bucky warned the others. The sun was starting to set as well and the beach got emptier. The others nodded and let you two walk away. When you were a bit far away and you calmed down you spoke.

"Bucky, I love you." You raised your head and looked at him. He stopped walking and smiled at you tenderly. You wrapped your arms around his neck and forced him to lean a bit so you could reach his lips. You kissed him passionately. "I-I'm sorry you had to do that-"

"Stop, you're not gonna apologize for other people being dicks." He said to you.

"A-And thank you for defending me." His arms tightened around your waist and then he leaned to kiss you again.

"No one will hurt you or disrespect you, not on my watch." Bucky promised you.

"Love of my life." Your lips curved into a shy smile and you kissed him once more. You held hands and then continued to walk on the beach while looking at the sunset.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Brr! I'm freezing." You let out.

"Oh no, you're not getting sick again." You two were sitting in front of the ocean and snuggling against each other. It was almost 7pm and it was nighttime now, you were on your own with Bucky for a good hour. "Come on, let's go join the others."

"Oh my God, did they make a bonfire?? That's so cool." You let out after you noticed something that looked like that near where you laid your stuff with them.

"Like that you'll get warmed up." He added.

"Hey." Nat greeted you two. "We thought you had gone home."

"You guys spend enough time with her but remember she's mine alone." Bucky teased. You rolled your eyes as you searched for your clothes. Your swimsuit was dry now so you put on your skirt and shirt again. "Come here, babydoll." The winter soldier sat on a log and then brought you on his lap.

"You guys made this? It's so pretty." You said to them as you looked at the fire dance in front of your mesmerized eyes.

"Yep. And do you know what the best part is?" Tony asked you.

"We got s'mores!" Steve announced excitedly.

"W-What's a smores?" You dared to ask.

"Beg your pardon?" Tony asked, he almost looked offended.

"Oh my God, that's so adorable." Bruce let out.

"W-What did I say?" You asked Bucky who was chuckling behind you. A small blush had crept on your cheeks.

"It's just a type of food." He replied as he grinned, amused by you.

"What is it composed of?" You continued asking.

"It's graham crackers with chocolate and marshmallows that you roast in a fire. It's delicious." Steve explained to you.

"Don't worry, I didn't know what that was either." Thor said to you.

"Well, it sure sounds tempting." You smiled. Bruce got up and went to get what you needed to make them while Steve passed you all the sticks to roast the marshmallows.

"Here you go." Bucky put a marshmallow on your stick and gave it back to you. "Now put it over the fire until it's brown." He explained to you and then he put a kiss on your cheek.

"God, I love the smell." Tony said while you all had your gazes fixed on the fire in front of you.

"Hold this for me doll while I prepare the graham crackers and chocolate." Bucky asked you.

"Okay." You took his stick and then you proceeded to get off him but he stopped you.

"Stay right there." He smiled as wrapped his metal arm around your waist. He leaned and catched the treats with his flesh hand then he started unwrapping them.

"Oh, it's starting to melt." You noticed.

"Then it's almost ready." Nat said. A few minutes later Bucky glanced at your sticks and then he decided it was good.

"They're roasted enough. Bring the sticks here." He said to you. He took the graham crackers and put a piece of chocolate between them then he closed them on the roasted marshmallow creating a little sandwich. "Here, try it." Bucky handed the treat to you. You looked at it and blew a bit on it before taking a bite.

"Mmm, it's so good!" You let out excitedly.

"That's so adorable." Nat smiled.

"I got the cutest girlfriend in the world." Bucky grinned as he looked at you eat.

"E-Eat your food, Bucky." You blushed slightly as you looked at him.

"Ah, crap. It's hot." The winter soldier was so lost in your eyes he just bit into his treat forgetting about the roasted marshmallow. He burned his mouth.

"See what happens when you're not paying attention?" You smiled.

"My attention is all yours." He replied seductively.

"You're an idiot." You leaned on him and kissed his lips happily.

"Did you just... heal me?" Bucky asked you with furrowed brows in confusion but he couldn't help his lips curving into a smile.

"Maybe I did." You teased.

"Kiss me again, I think you missed a spot." He asked you as he looked at your mouth and you did. You french kissed him forgetting a bit about the others around you. You were starting to feel hot, Bucky was gently stroking you as you kissed. You broke the kiss and sticked your forehead to his.

"I love you." You said quietly to him.

"I want to make love to y-"

"Shh!" You interrupted him and let out a small giggle. "Are you crazy? Oh my God." He amused you though. You took another bite of your s'mores as you stared at his eyes lovingly.

You continued roasting marshmallows and talking with the others, it eventually got darker and you could barely make out where the sea was. You had spent a really good day and you were sure you would never forget about it.

"Guys, I-" You started. You were all still sitting around the bonfire after you were done eating. They stopped talking and turned to look at you, waiting for what you had to say. "I-I just wanted to thank you for today." You said. You took a deep breath when you felt tears coming up, you couldn't help getting emotional. Bucky tightened his grip around your waist. "Not just for convincing me to come to the beach and you know... Swim again and all... But also for-" You took another deep breath when your voice started getting higher. You wiped a tear off your face and continued. "I-It's the first time I-I got defended against a group of people." You revealed. "A-And it really moved me." Bucky couldn't help it, he wrapped you in his arms and kissed your shoulder from behind. You giggled slightly as you caressed his flesh arm.

"You're never getting hurt ever again." Bucky said behind you.

"He may be your boyfriend but he's not the only one who's got your back." Nat added.

"We'll always be here for you, [Y/N]." Steve added as well.

"You're family." Bruce said.

"And family is the most important thing." Thor smiled at you.

"If anyone wants to mess with you we'll remind them they're messing with all the goddamn Avengers." Tony concluded. Suddenly they all got up and approached you and Bucky for a group hug. You two got up as well and then you all hugged. You couldn't help letting out a sob, you loved each one of them and they loved you back.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading <3


	85. At Long Last

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You found a friend and more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, I can't believe this is finally over.  
> It's been a little more than 3 months, I wrote the biggest work I've ever done and I'm really proud of how it turned out to be.  
> Thank you so much to everyone who's been following since day 1, encouraging me, leaving kudos, comments and being supportive.  
> Enjoy the last chapter ♡

"Bucky!" You surprised your boyfriend. You approached him from behind and dropped a plastic bag on his lap. He was sitting on his own on a couch in the living space.

"What's this?" He asked you with furrowed brows.

"Open it." You asked him with a grin. You couldn't help being excited. The winter soldier opened the bag and looked inside of it.

"Soap, shampoo, bath salt... Is that your way of telling me that I smell?" Bucky asked and you let out a small laugh.

"No, silly." You smiled as you wrapped your arms around his neck from behind. "It's my way of telling you I want to take a bath with you." His eyes widened instantly.

"Really?" He asked excitedly. "Like, finally??" You turned your head and looked at him as you nodded. "Is that where you were this morning with Natasha?"

"Hmm." You nodded again. "I had to buy a few things. I told you I wanted to make it special." You smiled and then bit onto your lower lip. "You know that floor of the tower downstairs with like the really huge relaxing area? Looks like a whole spa." You asked him and he nodded. "Meet me there in 30 minutes." You whispered to his ear before teasingly biting his earlobe. You winked at him before leaving the living space with your bag.

"God, she's gonna kill me one day." Bucky passed his hands on his face and his hair before letting out the breath he was holding.

  
  


You went to that floor you mentioned earlier. It was crazy. It had showers, massage tables, jaccuzis, it really looked like an empty spa. It just missed the employees. You went to the back of the room, it's Nat who talked to you about this place of the tower. In front of you laid a gigantic bathtub that could fit like six people perhaps. You put your products on the side and opened the water to fill the bathtub, this was gonna take time. You dropped a bit of soap, bath salts and even rose petals, it all started to smell so good. You had previously brought drinks and a fruits salad that you put inside a mini fridge that was in the corner of the room.

You stared at your work and it looked so beautiful, you couldn't wait to soak in there with Bucky. While the tub was getting filled you quickly took the elevator and went back to your floor to take what you needed. You stepped inside your room and picked the new swimsuit that you had also bought in the morning. Nat convinced you to take a bikini for the occasion. You accepted because this time it was just Bucky who was going to see you in it and he already knew your body by heart, you weren't afraid of wearing that in front of him.

When you took everything you needed you went back to the spa floor. Bucky could be coming at any minute now, the thirty minutes were almost spent. Next to the bathtub were changing rooms, you left your clothes in there and changed into the bikini and then you put your hair up with a clip. You also put on a bathrobe and then you waited for your boyfriend.

  
  


When Bucky stepped out of the elevator his eyes noticed something on the side of the entrance. There was a bathrobe for him as well with a note sticked on it.

" _You once told me you didn't have a bathrobe :P_ "

He chuckled slightly. Bucky wondered if you just didn't want to see him in his goddamn towel hung around his hips like he always wore. Well, you were about to be really surprised. The winter soldier went into a changing room to put on the bathrobe. There were a few ones on the floor, after all the area was huge. Bucky didn't know where you were but all he had to do was follow the smell of the soap to find where you wanted him to be. He finally went to the back of the area and when he saw the huge bathtub filled with different things he guessed that's where he needed to be.

You discreetly went behind him and wrapped your arms around his torso. Bucky smiled in amusement, he knew you were there but he didn't want to ruin your fun. After all, he was a super soldier and so he sensed your presence.

"My beautiful doll." Bucky turned around and leaned to put a kiss on your lips. "I'm so lucky to have you." You grinned happily.

"You like what I did?" You asked him as you gestured the bathtub.

"I love it." He replied truthfully.

"You don't regret waiting now, do you?" You teased.

"I never regretted waiting with you for anything. I don't regret waiting to kiss you, I don't regret waiting to make love to you, I don't regret waiting to take a bath with you." He smiled tenderly as he looked at you with heart eyes. "The only thing I regret is not telling you I love you sooner... Before your birthday." You made him lean since he was taller than you and then you kissed him deeply. That was in the past now.

"How about we get in while the water is still warm?" You asked him.

"Please." He breathed before putting his hands on the knot in front of your bathrobe. You let him untie it and then take it off you. "Doll..." He blushed. "Y-You're so beautiful, you look so good."

"Thank you." You blushed as well. You hung your bathrobe on a hook on the changing room door while Bucky was untying his own knot.

"I'm gonna die." He suddenly let out and your eyes widened.

"What??" You asked in surprise. While you hung your bathrobe you were giving him your back and so naturally he glanced at your butt in the bikini.

"You look so good." He repeated again and you giggled nervously. You felt a bit embarrassed. Bucky finally took off his bathrobe and when you looked at him you gasped. "B-Bucky! Y-You're naked??" You couldn't help bringing your eyes to the sky.

"What about it?" He asked.

"I-I thought we said swimsuits..." Your face was as red as a beet. You didn't even know why you were blushing, you had seen him many times and even touched him there.

"Don't remember." Bucky chuckled.

"Oh my God... Anyway-" You sighed. "Just get in there." He hung his own bathrobe and then he gave you his hand to help you climb in. "T-Thanks." You said.

"You're absolutely welcome, my love." He smirked. Your heart did a jump inside your chest. You both got in and finally sat.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. don't let anyone come to this floor until we leave." You ordered the AI.

"Yes, miss." She replied. Bucky looked at you with a smirk.

"And please start playing the playlist I gave to you earlier. Just quietly in the background." Calm synthwave music started playing. You liked to call it space music, it was relaxing and made you dream when you closed your eyes. It was perfect.

"You really planned everything." Bucky was impressed.

"I have more but we got all the time in the world at the moment." You replied. "Is the temperature okay to you?" You asked him a bit worried. "Otherwise I can ch-"

"Everything-" Bucky interrupted you and wrapped his arms around your waist to bring you against him. "Is perfect, doll. You're perfect."

"Oh wow, okay, that's your-" You blushed as you glanced down before quickly looking away. "And it's touching me now." Bucky chuckled lowly, amused by your reaction. You turned your head and stared into his eyes this time. You couldn't help smiling, he was so handsome and most importantly he was yours. All of him. "Kiss me." You asked him. Bucky smirked before leaning on your face and catching your mouth with his. You wrapped your arms around his neck and squeezed your chest against his. He broke the kiss and buried his head in the crook of your neck to leave lovebites there. "Bucky..." You moaned quietly. He searched for one of your hands around his neck and as he tangled his fingers with yours he slowly guided it to his crotch. You felt it twitch when you closed your hand around it. Bucky's breathing got funny when you started stroking him.

"I love you so much." He whispered to you.

"Me too, Bucky." He took your hand again and tangled his fingers with yours. You looked at him a bit confused.

"We got all the time in the world." He repeated your words with a smile. "I want to enjoy this bath with you first." You smiled at him as and then licked your lips before kissing him again. "Stop kissing me you temptress or I won't be able to control myself." You both smirked.

"Alright." You replied. "Can I wash your hair?" You suggested.

"You want to?" He asked.

"Hmm. "You nodded in confirmation.

"Alright." Bucky replied. You got up and sat on the edge of the bathtub behind him. He took your legs and put them over his shoulders. He started caressing them making you giggle while you leaned to grab the shower head. "Ticklish?"

"Stop asking questions you know the answer to, Bucky." You smiled. "Close your eyes." He did as you said and then you started wetting his hair. When you were done you grabbed the shampoo bottle and dropped some of its content onto your palm. You rubbed your hands together before spreading it on his head. You carefully scrubbed his scalp before massaging it. Bucky let out a soft hum of pleasure and it made you happy.

"Why did you stop?" He whined.

"Don't worry, I'm not done." You said before washing the shampoo off his hair. "You can open your eyes again." You opened a tub of hair mask and took a bit of the product to put it on his hair.

"That smells so good." He commentated.

"Right? I love it too." You massaged his scalp from front to the back of his head, you didn't forget the area near his temples as well.

"Doll, I'm in love with your hands." Bucky let out.

"You're in love with all of me." You smiled.

"That's true too." He said. "That feels so good, I love what you're doing to me."

"I'm very glad you're pleased." You said as you kept massaging his head. "Your hair's gonna be so soft I can't wait to run my hands through it when it's dry."

"Let me wash your hair too." He requested.

"Are you sure?" You asked.

"Yes, please." You smiled happily at his answer.

"Okay. Let the hair mask rest, don't wash it off yet." You said as you rinsed your hands. Bucky helped you sit back in the bathtub and then he took your place behind you. He removed the hairgrip you had and then he proceeded to wet your hair with the shower head.

"Uh, it's this one right?" He showed you a shampoo bottle.

"Yes, Bucky." You giggled slightly. The winter soldier dropped a bit of shampoo in your hair and then he started carefully scrubbing you. Too carefully... "You can scrub harder you know." You said to him.

"Don't wanna hurt you." He said. You knew he was worried about the metal part of him.

"You're not." You giggled. "Bucky, that hand of yours went into places inside of me and only made me feel good, I'm sure it won't hurt my head."

"Stop speaking like that, you have no idea what you do to me." Bucky smirked. He took a deep breath and finally started scrubbing a bit harder.

"Like that... It's good." You commentated with your eyes closed. Then he washed the shampoo off before using the hair mask as well. He recognized it because of the scent. "Hmmm...~" You hummed of pleasure as well as he massaged your head. "God, I'm the happiest." You let out. Bucky gently tilted your head back and then leaned on your face to put a kiss on your lips. You giggled happily against his reverse kiss, it felt funny but not bad.

"Wait until I scrub your body." The winter soldier teased. You bit onto your lower lip as you thought about it. "Here you go." He trapped your moisturized hair with the clip.

"I'm surprised you could do that." You said.

"I have long hair too, doll." He replied. You took his hand while he got back in the bathtub next to you and then you hugged him tightly.

"I'm so in love with you." You left several kisses on his face as he laughed happily under you.

"Can I remove this?" Bucky asked as he eyed your bikini top.

"You can do whatever you want." You replied.

"You shouldn't say that." He smirked as he put a hand behind your back to untie the knot you made on the back. "You could regret it."

"I never regretted any of the times you made me do something." You grinned. The winter soldier removed the bikini top off you and put it away on the edge of the huge bathtub.

"You're so beautiful-" He left a kiss on your nose. "And all mine." You gulped when he brought his hands to your breasts and shivered when he started fondling them.

"Bucky..." You moaned his name and closed your eyes as his thumbs circled your nipples.

"Come here." He whispered sensually. Bucky wrapped his arms around your waist as you sat on his lap and then he raised you a bit higher so his face could be at your chest level.

"Oh, fuck..." You bit onto your lower lip when he catched one of your nipples in his mouth. He circled it with his tongue and then sucked on it. "Ah!" You gasped and then covered your mouth with your hand in embarrassment. "S-Sorry, I just got surprised." One of his hands had ventured inside your bikini bottom and grabbed one of your buttcheeks.

"Don't apologize." He chuckled in amusement before attacking your other nipple.

"Bucky...?" You asked.

"Yes, my love?" You started blushing, you were a bit embarrassed.

"C-Can you... Do- Fuck." You cursed. You took a deep breath, you were nervous.

"Tell me what you want." He whispered before continuing his kisses on your chest. "It's just me, you don't have to be nervous." You bit onto your lower lip.

"Bite me." You finally dared to ask. Bucky raised his head and looked at you. "P-Please." He started chuckling lowly.

"God, I love you." The winter soldier grinned before putting his lips on your skin again. He licked your nipple and kissed it before gently biting the side of your breast.

"Hhhn~" You closed your eyes. You put your hands on his shoulders. "D-Don't hesitate to be... rougher." You said. "Ow!" You let out but then you started giggling a bit.

"You're really into this, huh?" He was amused.

"It's your fault for biting a total stranger in the past." You said. "I can't believe you did th- Ah!" You brought your hand to your breast. He had really just bit your nipple.

"Did I hurt you?" Bucky worried.

"I-I don't know... It's weird." The winter soldier let out a small chuckle. "L-Like it hurt me but I-I didn't dislike it..." You tried to explain.

"Maybe I can try again?" You nodded. Your boyfriend put his mouth around your other nipple, he teased it with his tongue before you felt him using his teeth.

"O-Oh my God... Ow!" You winced. "I-I think I get it, it's right before it starts hurting it feels good."

"Tell me when." He re put his mouth on your nipple and applied small pressure with his teeth.

"Oh God, here." You said.

"You don't like biting, you like nibbling." Bucky explained to you with a smirk.

"I don't care what it's called, do it again... Please." You pleaded him and he laughed.

"Everything my babydoll wants." He nibbled on your nipple and you squirmed against him. You took one of his hands and guided it between your legs. "Take off your bottom." He said. You quickly untied the knots on the sides of your bikini bottom and then threw it towards where the top was. "Ride my thigh."

"W-What?" You asked him.

"Do it, rub yourself against it." Bucky laid his thigh in front of him and made you straddle it. God, it felt so strong between your own thighs. He was so muscled. Bucky raised his leg a little and his skin finally came in contact with your clit, you couldn't help a little moan escape your lips.

"O-Okay..." You said. You put your hands on his shoulders for support and then you started slowly grinding your hips on his thigh.

"How do you feel?" He whispered.

"N-Not bad..." You replied truthfully. Bucky put his hand on your nape and then made you lean to kiss. He licked your lips and you parted them so he could invade your mouth. You moaned a bit louder as your hips grinded faster.

"Tell me when you're close." You nodded. He kept fondling your breasts and pinching your nipples as you kissed.

"B-Bucky..." You warned him before gulping. The winter soldier put his hands on your waist and raised you to make you sit on the edge of the bathtub. You didn't have time to whine about the loss of friction that he spread your legs and then you found his head between them. He licked a long stripe along your slit and you threw your head back instantly. "Oh, fuck! Bucky!" His mouth closed on your clit and he sucked hard on it before applying pressure with his tongue. He teased your bundle of nerves and when you started pulling on his hair he knew you were there. He gave your clit rapid licks and you came. You let out a long moan, your lower stomach and clit pleasurably ached. It felt so fucking good. "T-Thank you..." You panted.

"You're thanking me for eating you out?" Bucky grinned.

"I'm thanking you for satisfying me and making me feel so good." You corrected him.

"Anytime, babydoll." He smiled as he stroked your twitching thighs.

"I-I'm shivering, please hold me." You asked him. He helped you in the bathtub again and then he pulled you against him again, hugging you tightly. "I love you so much."

"Me too." Bucky smiled tenderly.

"Crap, we should rinse our hair now otherwise we might go bald." You rememberd you still had the mask on.

"Come here." He grabbed the shower head and turned it on. "Close your eyes." He went behind you and gently washed your hair. "It's so soft." He commentated as he ran his fingers through it. "You're done."

"Thank you." You were about to put it up again but Bucky stopped you.

"Let your hair down, it's pretty." He requested you.

"Okay." You smiled. "Your turn. Close your eyes." And then you did the same to him. You closed the faucet and went to hug your boyfriend. "It's soft and smells so good." You giggled slightly.

"My God, I can't wait to take so many more baths with you." Bucky let out excitedly as he slowly twirled on himself with you against him. He started leaving several kisses on your face and it warmed your heart. "You're the cutest thing I've ever laid my eyes on."

"Bucky, stop..." You blushed.

"Hey, what did we say now?" He asked.

"Just the truth." You smiled.

"Only the truth." The winter soldier smiled back. He took one of your hands and brought it to his lips to leave a kiss inside your palm. You both knew you loved that.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Mmm. Delicious." Bucky hummed in a satisfied way after you put another slice of fruit inside his mouth. You put the bowl on the border and leaned on him to kiss.

"Very sweet, indeed." You grinned. "Wait here." You said to him before getting out of the bathtub and opening the fridge in the room to get something else that you had hidden previously. "Close your eyes."

"Okay." His brows furrowed a bit in confusion but he trusted you so he closed his eyes and waited for whatever you had prepared. You climbed back in the bathtub and then you straddled his thighs. You gently took his flesh hand and put something inside of his palm. "Hmm, it's cold."

"That's because it was in the fridge." You giggled slightly. "You can open your eyes." And so he did.

"What's this?" You rolled your eyes as you smiled.

"I really have to do everything, huh?" You took the tiny pouch you had put in his palm and untied the knot on it. You dropped its content in his hand. Bucky's eyes widened.

"You're giving me... a ring?" He was astounded.

"Hmm." You nodded. "I-It's not much, really-" Suddenly you found yourself being nervous. You didn't realize until now what it could mean to Bucky. "I-I just wanted to give you something as important as the necklace and the bracelet are to me. Something you could look at and be reminded of me." You smiled shyly. Bucky stared at the ring. It was in gold and despite looking very simple was beautiful. You took it from his palm and then you put it on his flesh ring finger. You caressed his hand tenderly. "S-Say something, please." His silence made you very nervous.

"Doll..." Your eyes widened. Bucky had tears in the corner of his eyes. He wrapped his arms around your body and held you tightly against him before leaning back a bit and then he kissed you passionately. You softly hummed against his lips. Bucky's hand stroked your cheek as you kissed. "Thank you."

"You like it?" You asked him with a shy smile.

"I love it. I love you." He breathed before kissing your lips again. "You're the love of my life." You grinned happily as you caressed his back with your hands.

"I'm happy you do. I love you too." You said. "Say..."

"Yes, my love?" He replied.

"Remember the day after my first time..." Bucky started thinking.

"I brought you breakfast in bed?" He asked.

"Hmm." You smiled. "But not that. You gave me a massage." You reminded him.

"You want one again?" You looked at him excitedly.

"Not quite." You answered. "I want to give **you** one." You finally let out. "I want to scrub your body, run my hands on you and give you a massage. Is that okay?"

"How do you want me to refuse? What kind of madman would refuse?" He chuckled. You leaned to put a kiss on his neck and another one on his lips before grabbing what you needed to wash his body.

"Sit on the border with me." Bucky gave you his hand and helped you stand then you both proceeded to sit on the border of the bathtub. You grabbed a loofa and put some body soap on it. "Give me your arm." The winter soldier raised his flesh arm, you grabbed his hand and then you started gently scrubbing his skin.

"I feel like I'm dreaming." Bucky let out with a bright grin as you continued to scrub his body.

"I felt like I was in a dream since I came back from my first mission." You said with nostalgia. "You... Were you actually waiting for me in the parking lot?" You asked him.

"I was." Bucky replied. "I had woken up from a nap that Steve forced me to take because I was going crazy worrying about you in the tower." You smiled slightly, he moved you. "I found him in the kitchen cooking a feast, he announced me you were finally coming back." Bucky smiled as he rememberd, his eyes were focused on your hands scrubbing him. "I-" He chuckled slightly. "I rememberd I wore a tight white shirt. You said you liked my arms so- Doll?" You couldn't help it, you started tearing up a little but you were smiling.

"I-I... It's so hard to believe... Even to this day... that someone could genuinely like me." You spoke. "Why did it have to take 25 years?" You asked. "No one cared for me before and I-I just think about Steve cooking for my return... You waiting for me-" The winter soldier came closer to you and hugged you tightly against him.

"I don't know why it took so long just like I don't know why I was being kept alive for so long but I want to believe it's because we needed to find each other." Bucky said next to your head. "All of it happened so it could come to this day, that's what I want to believe." You wiped your tears with your wrists that didn't have soap on them after he released you.

"You're so adorable, I really love you Bucky." You said to him with a shy smile. "You have no idea what it does to me knowing that... sometimes you were as nervous as me."

"I told you babydoll, you're the best thing that's happened to me." Bucky leaned on you and catched your lips with his.

"You're literally the only thing that's happened to me. The only thing about my life that I don't want to forget. And even with all the misfortune I've encountered in my life I still feel lucky... because I met you."

"God, I want to make love to you right now." Bucky put his hands on your waist but you stopped him.

"We will, I promise you." You smiled at him. "But first I want to finish this." You said as you guided your hand to his chest and washed him with the loofa. "Come on, turn around so I can rub your back like you wanted me to the first time you mentioned us showering together." Bucky sighed in resignation and gave you his back. "Don't pout, I promise you I'll do whatever you want when we're done."

"I have a few ideas." He smirked. You continued scrubbing him from head to toe until you were finally done. "You can massage me another day-" Bucky interrupted when you put the loofa away and brought your hands to his shoulders. "I want to run my hands all over you, doll." He pleaded.

"Alright, fine." You accepted.

"Come here, baby." He grabbed you by your waist and brought you on his lap, you were facing forward, giving him your back.

"Are you sure? It feels a bit dangerous, you're all slippery." You worried.

"Don't worry, I'm not letting you go." Bucky grinned as he put his metal arm around your stomach and then he left a kiss on your shoulder. He grabbed the soapy loofa and started rubbing it against your skin like you did to him earlier. "Your skin is so soft." He praised you. You bit onto your lower lip as you blushed, you really loved him taking care of you.

"I was so wrong to wait this long to have a bath with you." You let out and he chuckled behind you. "Bucky..." You giggled slightly when he guided the loofa to your chest and then you felt his fingers slightly tickle your nipples.

"I love when you laugh." Your stomach did a backflip, God, he was always so sweet to you. "Spread your legs." Bucky gently scrubbed the insides of your thighs before going a little further up.

"Hhh..." You closed your eyes and sighed of pleasure when he lightly brushed your slit. He put the loofa away and grabbed the shower head to rince his hands and your crotch from the soap.

"Bend your left leg over here." Your brows furrowed a little but you did as he said. Bucky put his metal hand under your left knee and brought it a bit higher to have you spread your thighs. Then his flesh hand went to your pussy.

"Oh God, Bucky..." You understood what he wanted to do now. "Hhhn!" He brought his index finger to your clit and slowly circled it to tease you. "You really couldn't wait..." You whined.

"Please-" He whispered behind you. "I want to hear you. Please come for me." Bucky flicked your clit and then he slowly inserted his middle finger inside of you. You gulped, you started breathing a little faster. He pushed in and out of you to spread you then he shoved a second finger in. "You're so warm, soft and-" He brought his fingers out to show you how slick you were. "So wet and ready for me." You were as red as a beet as you looked at his fingers. He pushed his digits back inside of you and you moaned. "That's it babydoll, don't hold back your voice." You held onto his forearms as he fingered you, the winter soldier kept praising you, he whispered sweet words into your ear to get you very turned on and damn, it worked.

"O-Oh, fuck... Bucky..." You started panting. The knot in your abdomen tightened.

"Rub yourself while I finger you." He ordered you. Fuck, you felt so good and you didn't want it to stop so you did as he said. You slowly rubbed your clit, it was warm and throbbing, needing to be touched. "Are you feeling good?"

"Y-Yes..." You admitted.

"Do you want me to go faster? Deeper maybe? Should I add another finger?" He asked you.

"N-No, it's perfect..." You replied. "J-Just curl them a bit mo- Oh God, fuck!" You threw your head back. "B-Bucky!" You cried out his name as he rubbed against your soft spot. Suddenly he started drilling his fingers inside of you and without any warnings you came on his hand, screaming his name in pleasure. Bucky left kisses on the side of your neck and gently caressed your thighs as you calmed down.

"I love you, you're so beautiful." He praised you. He took back the loofa and finished scrubbing your entire body. He looked at the little soap bubbles covering your skin, you were glowing he found you so adorable. "I'm done." He said after leaving one last kiss on your skin. You both stood up and then rinsed yourselves off the soap. "Come here." Bucky handed you his hand.

"Where?" You asked as you grabbed his hand. He helped you out of the bathtub.

"The bath water's all dirty now and I don't wanna do you in there." He explained to you with a smirk. He guided you to a resting room where several deck chairs were neatly settled. The deck chairs were in wood but had a mattress on them, they looked very comfortable. Bucky laid on one and then gestured you to come join him. He let out a satisfied sigh when you laid on top of him. "I love feeling your weight on me." He chuckled slightly.

"I can feel your... against my stomach." You blushed as you rested your head on his chest.

"You're warm and soft, I love holding you." Bucky smiled as he gently caressed your back. "So... You said you'd do everything I wanted?" He asked.

"What do you want?" You grinned as you turned your head to look at him.

"I want you on top... Please." The winter soldier requested.

"Everything you want, baby." You smiled before putting your lips against his. Bucky whined of frustration when you leaned back, he already missed your kiss but he quickly changed his mind when you proceeded to sit on his hips. You didn't even need to touch his dick to get him ready, Bucky's been erected since you two entered the bath. You laid it flat on his abdomen and then you started slowly grinding your hips against his. His dick slid between your wet folds.

"It's so pretty, I wanna kiss you there again." Bucky said as he stared between your legs.

"Enough about me, this is about you now." You replied to him. "You've been so good to me, I love you Bucky." You smiled at him as you leaned a bit forward. You placed one of your hands on his chest for support while the other went between your thighs to grab his dick and guide it towards your entrance.

"God, you're so hot." You both let out a quiet sigh of pleasure when your bodies finally connected. You put both of your hands on his chest and then you started moving.

"F-Fuck..! I feel so full." You closed your eyes as your brows furrowed a bit.

"It feels so fucking good inside of you." Bucky put his hands on your waist and held you there while you moved against him. He gently rubbed your skin there with his thumbs to soothe you. Soon enough they crept futher up and stopped on your chest. Bucky played with your breasts, he squeezed them and pulled on your nipples to tease you. You bit onto your lower lip to quiet some of your moans. You got louder when Bucky started thrusting his hips against yours as well. He went deeper inside of you and it felt amazing.

"I love you, Bucky." Your voice died in your throat when he brushed against one of your soft spots.

"Me too, doll. You're doing so well." You took his flesh hand in yours and brought it to your lips to kiss his knuckles. Bucky traced your lips with his thumb and when you opened your mouth he put it in. You licked and sucked on his finger, never breaking eye contact. The winter soldier looked so good. His face was red, his hair wet, his pupils dilated and his lips parted as he panted quietly. The sight made the knot in your abdomen tighten. Bucky put his flesh hand on your nape and brought you against him. He crashed his mouth on yours and you kissed passionately. It was savage, you licked and sucked on each other's lips, teeth clattering against the other, you felt feverish. Bucky brought his hands to your buttcheeks and grabbed them hard before thrusting fastly inside of you.

"Bucky!!" You screamed his name next to his ear. He felt you being close and when he started drilling inside of you you knew he was close as well. You wrapped your arms around his neck and clinged tightly onto him while he fucked you rawly until finally you heard him groan next to you. Your eyes rolled back inside their orbits when you felt him explode inside of you. His hips slowed down and you finally let out the breath you were holding. You gulped before raising your head to his level, you looked at each other for a few seconds before smiling and kissing. Bucky held your face between his palms as he kissed you, gently caressing your cheeks.

"You're the love of my life, [Y/N]." He breathed against your lips as you stared into each other's eyes.

"And you're mine, Bucky." You smiled tenderly. "I love you, you love me and that's only the truth."

  
  


End.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really gonna miss Bucky, not gonna lie. As I told you guys in the previous chapters I'm currently writing a Loki x reader that will happen 10 months later in the future from here! It's not posted yet, I want to write a few chapters first before publishing it. I also want to take a little break, I've been writing OTT everyday non-stop for 3 months and it really drained me.  
> I'm also thinking of maybe writing a little something for Thor and why not something for Bucky that could happen after the Thanos snap. You guys suggested that when I asked for recommandations but I couldn't add it to this story.  
> I hope you keep in touch with my future works, thank you again for reading until here, leaving kudos and comments.  
> It has been my pleasure to write for you guys and for myself.  
> ❤

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, hope you enjoyed!  
> Comments and kudos motivate me to write!


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